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self care for when you hit rock bottom

i fucking hate self care posts made by neurotypicals so here’s one from someone who Actually Gets It

-can’t shower or take a bath? me either. dry shampoo can make your hair look and feel cleaner, and baby wipes or makeup wipes work great to get the top layer of grime off your skin.

-can’t wash your sheets and make your bed? i feel you. push your blankets out of the way and shake the crumbs off your sheet. it will at least be a bit more comfortable.

-can’t even change out of your dirty pajamas? been there. hit yourself with some febreeze and a lint roller. if you can, brush your hair. if you can’t, hair ties and bobby pins are fantastic.

-can’t make anything to eat? same. if you can, there’s no shame in ordering food. in fact, it’s probably better you eat something rather than go hungry. if you can’t, try and find something that comes pre-made or takes minimal effort to make. at the very least, drink some water.

can’t respond to messages or reach out for help? yeah, i get that. set an alarm for a few hours from now and respond to any messages you need to once you’ve given yourself time to prepare. if they’re Important Messages that need Professional Responses, you can find fill-in-the-blank format rough drafts on google. as far as personal messages go, don’t feel bad for sending a mass “I’m sorry, I’m in a personal emergency right now. I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.” response to everyone.

-can’t even sleep because it’s so bad? asmr videos always knock me out, personally, but i also watch a lot of bob ross. just try to find something quiet and soothing to use as background noise and take your mind off it, or at least give you a more peaceful environment to think about it.

-can’t go for a walk/drive? try opening the blinds or curtains. you’re still exposing yourself to the outside world. baby steps. (i also play animal crossing or sims; it may be virtual but fuck it. i went on a walk.)

-can’t go into work/school? let people know. let your coworkers or classmates know it’s an emergency and you can’t make it. give yourself up to two days, but then you have to go back. ask to have your work emailed to you so you know what you missed.

-can’t brush your teeth and wash your face? makeup or baby wipes and gum or mouthwash. don’t let yourself physically rot bc you’re rotting emotionally.

-remember that you’ve been here before. if you survived then you can survive now. that’s what this is about- survival. you don’t have to be living your Best Life. right now, it’s more than enough that you’re alive.

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People interpret “expensive wedding” to mean “my fiance and I spent a large amount of money to throw a great celebration that was important to us” instead of “I went into debt because I have been brainwashed into thinking that if I don’t have Barbie’s Perfect Hollywood Dream Wedding™️ by age 27 I have Failed and my life is a sad joke, so I’m going to blow my savings on gilded stationary and custom napkins and have a breakdown if I think my bridesmaids aren’t treating this as the all-important, life-defining moment I need it to be and dieting so they fit in these designer dresses I picked out for them, and I need to make sure everything is Perfect because my fiance isn’t interested in helping me, and a beautiful wedding is the most important part of a good marriage…. right?”

Which is. What expensive heterosexual wedding culture is, because women are literally sold unrealistic princess fantasies from childhood that are promised to them by a predatory wedding industry and portrayed as The Key to Happiness. It’s almost as exploitative as the funeral industry.

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The beauty of loving someone so hard and not needing them to love you back is so phenomenal. Loving someone with all that you are while maintaining a healthy bond with them that doesn't demand anything beyond mutual understanding and respect is so amazing. How could anyone hate that? How could anyone justify hating love that need not be reciprocated? Loving someone without pushing that on them, making them uncomfortable or confused; it's so beautiful and good.

You don't need people to love you the way you love them. Because love is not something that should be demanded. It should be freely given and allowed to grow without fear.

The way you love isn't wrong, it's beautiful. One sided love is important too. You care so much, you love so much. It's beautiful. Your love is beautiful.

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can we just take a moment to recognise mentally ill people who are high functioning?

the ones that constantly question the validity of their illness(es) because they managed to get out of bed this morning/are keeping up with their classes/can still socially interact? because they can do the things that most neurotypicals can do, even if they find it very difficult?

the ones that are questioned by their loved ones on the existence of their disorders? that face constant ableist remarks of “but you can’t be depressed/ill/manic/psychotic/etc!” “you don’t look mentally ill!” “it’s just hormones!” “oh, have you tried yoga?” “you’re just on a journey of finding yourself.” “you’re too happy/too smart to be mentally ill!”

the ones who aren’t taken seriously by their therapists/doctors/psychiatrists because of how self aware they are and how well they can articulate their feelings and thoughts?

the ones that, on their bad days, are told that “others have it worse” just because they don’t outwardly show their symptoms all of the time? the ones that have their pain and their struggles constantly diminished until they don’t know what is real and what isn’t because of this?

the ones that don’t receive the treatments or correct diagnosis in a short matter of time (or at all) because “they’re not bad enough?”

the ones that end up suicidal or manic or psychotic in hospital with no warning because their illnesses aren’t taken seriously until its too late?

as a high functioning neurodivergent young person suffering from a myriad of different mental health issues, i see you and i hear you and i support you.

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It’s 1:28 am where I am now… These took quite a while.

And also thank you to the lovely model used for demiguy. They were kind enough to send me selfies to use as reference since I was stuck with the poses <3

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Akoisexual (also called akoinesexual and lithsexual) refers to a person who experiences sexual attraction, but has their feelings fade if reciprocated. Akoisexual can also be defined as someone who doesn’t care or want their feelings reciprocated. Lithsexual isn’t commonly used due to concerns of appropriation of lesbian culture. (By wikia)

He/she is totally hot, but I don't actually want toget involved sexually - since I’m akoisexual I’d prefer to just fantasize from afar. (Urban dictionary)

~arts are Not mine, @danshing-yehet , rockboytod,redrubble, and the aesthetics..i don’t know how made them if you know please tell

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Me, whenever my libido acts up:

#ace #asexual #asexual blog #asexuality #ace spec #ace pride #ace positivity #aroace

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Me anytime a sex scene takes place in a show/movie: This is literally the most unnecessary thing can we not

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A-spec ABC’s  A is for...

Abroromantic / Abrosexual: An orientation that constantly changes or is fluid - Not a-spec specific but can include aspec orientations

Aceflux / Aroflux: An orientation and/or attraction that fluxuates

Ace-spec: An orientation on the asexual spectrum. Can be an umbrella term or an orientation on its own.

Acespike / Arospike:  Attraction that is generally at zero, but can spike for a time before returning to zero.

Acevague / Arovague: Asexuality/Aromanticism influenced by neurodivergency.

Acoromantic / Acosexual: Asexual/Aromantic(spec) because of negative past experiences.

Adfecturomantic / Adfectusexual: Asexuality/Aromanticism influenced by neurodivergency.

Aegoromantic / Aegosexual ( Alternative Labels: Autochorrisromantic / Autochorrissexual ) : Experiencing attraction that is disconnected from oneself.

Akoiromantic / Akoisexual (Alternative labels: Lithromantic / Lithsexual ) : Experiencing attraction that fades once it is reciprocated/a relationship is formed and/or that the person does not want reciprocated.

Aplatonic: A term only for Arospec individuals who also do not experience platonic attraction and do not desire a Queerplatonic relationship. (Does not mean you do not have or want friends.)

Apothiromatic / Apothisexual: A-spec specific orientation for romance/sex repulsed individuals who do not wish to be in a relationship

Apresromantic / Apresexual : An orientation where romantic/sexual attraction is felt only after another type of attraction is formed.

A-spec: An umbrella term for ace-spec and aro-spec orientations, can also be an orientation on its own.

Aromantic: A person who does not experience romantic attraction.

Aro-spec: An orientation on the aromantic spectrum. Can be an orientation on its own.

Asexual: A person who does not experience sexual attraction

Autochorrisromantic / Autochorrissexual (Alternative Labels: Aegoromantic / Aegosexual ) : Experiencing attraction that is disconnected from oneself.

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Aesthetic Attraction:  Attraction to beauty and appearance.

Alterous Attraction: Attraction defined by emotional and psychological closeness. Can be a mix of platonic and romantic, somewhere between, or completely independent.

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BIG MOOD

my ex boyfriend: hey so why did we break up btw

my closeted lithromantic ass: *nervous laughter* heh well you see,,,,

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“you can’t identify your sexuality or romantic orientation as being not attracted to anyone. That doesn’t make you LGBT.”

“okay, then are you straight?”

“what? No, I’m gay. I’m a guy attracted to guys. I don’t feel attracted to girls.”

“So you’re identifying yourself as who you are attracted to, but also by who you aren’t attracted to. Correct?”

“well… Yeah, but-”

“Then why can’t asexuals and aromantics define themselves wholly by who they are not attracted to?”

“well… Because sometimes they date the opposite gender. So they’re like passing.”

“Bisexuals may date the same or the opposite gender. Does this make them straight, if they date the opposite gender? Does appearing to be straight mean you are straight?”

“well no…”

“then why does it make asexuals and aromantics straight?”

“..well they’re just a new trend, they just want to be in the community because it’s cool now.”

“what about this newspaper from 1970 that talks about including asexuals with other LGBT people? Also, there are many historical figures who are thought to have been asexual or aromantic, such as Nikola Tesla and Queen Elizabeth, to name a couple.”

“..oh. Huh.”

“is it possible that asexuals and aromantics are LGBT, then?”

“huh. Yeah, I guess so.”

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To Do List:

1. love and respect asexual people

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This has probably been done before but what an aro mood

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Bringing this back.