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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Connor: You look a lot like this other android I met. Daniel?
Simon: Okay, well, first of all, we’re the same model. Second of all, I do not look like him, he looks like me. I was built first. That means this face is my face, not his.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Markus: Well, well, well, if it isn’t Connor.
Connor: But it is me.
Markus: No, it’s an expression-
Connor: Your deviant tricks won’t work on me!
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Gavin [uncontrollably sobbing]: I can’t see you anymore, I won’t let you hurt me!
RK900: It was a sit-up, Detective. You did one sit-up.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Markus: I think I have a plan.
Josh: Does the plan include us not dying?
Markus: I said I have a plan, not a miracle.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Chris: Anyone else feel good when their brain releases a bunch of endorphins?
Hank: Can’t relate.
Gavin: Why would my brain release a bunch of dolphins?
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Markus: Simon, could you give me a hand?
Simon: Sure.
Simon: *grabs Markus’ hand *
Markus: Cute, but that’s not what I meant.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Elijah: Just found out the world doesn’t revolve around me.
Elijah: Shocked and upset.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Gavin: Fowler said I need to grow up. I was speechless.
Gavin: It’s hard to say anything when you have 45 gummy bears in your mouth.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Kara: If you had to choose one of us as your favorite, who would it be?
Markus: I won’t do that. I can’t do that. I simply cannot do tha-
Josh: Oh my fucking God, just say Simon’s your favorite, he’s everyone’s favorite!
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Hank: I am decayed. My lungs are full of thorns and mildew. My bones are held together by vines. I am fragile. Be gentle with my corpse.
Connor: Get out of bed, Lieutenant, you’re going to work whether you like it or not.
Hank: I refuse.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Hank: No one’s ever really alone, we’ve got a lifetime of regrets to keep us company.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Gavin: So you’re a little smarter than me. So what?
RK900: No, I’m a lot smarter than you.
RK900: This napkin is a little smarter than you.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Simon: Why does everyone always assume Josh and North are the ones that have a plan? Maybe someone else has a plan!
Markus: Please go ahead.
Simon: Oh no, that was hypothetical. I’ve got nothing.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Josh: Strength is forgiving someone who was never really sorry.
North: Okay, not to be overdramatic, but I would literally rather die.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Connor: Hank, you love me, right?
Hank: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere that I won’t like.
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Josh: It’s very interesting how Markus always looks so calm and composed. I wonder how he does it.
Markus [internally]: Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck f-
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dbhthingsandstuff · 3 years
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Simon: What are we doing?
North: Crime.
Simon: Crime?
Simon [strained]: Great.
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