grownupkid94

[grownupkid94]

#RIPMFDOOM (at Phoenix, Arizona) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJe1-McHcXD/?igshid=16hy21958fm9w

#ripmfdoom

[grownupkid94]

[grownupkid94]

Love this. Check it out. (at Phoenix, Arizona) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJKRF2bHgwJ/?igshid=8rjc8sgqqyfn

[grownupkid94]

#WinterSolstice (at Phoenix, Arizona) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJETZn1narC/?igshid=klzmf36g2ncn

#wintersolstice

[grownupkid94]

Crowns

Stole wisdom from the gods like Prometheus stole fire/Terrence Howard ain’t the only light-skin building an empire/this ain’t the wisdom you get from Koran, bible or vedas/this the wisdom you get from growing up playing sega/with your mama bcuz your dad off fighting/my cousin being wronged is what got me into writing/my hands never idle, but the devil still working/been a reject since new boyz was jerking/

[grownupkid94]

Back

Still wearing snapbacks and backpacks/still sagging out my beanies and talking about my feelings/still spending days getting high and chilling on the stoop/still spending nights trying to move from sedans to coupes/sometimes I miss the days when it was me and the troops/

[grownupkid94]

Can't wait to get famous so i can make the music drake ain't since take care/regrets of all the girls I love in my nightmares/last time I got high I told her I loved her/next time I get high I won't be thinking of her/all I wanna do is build the cornel west Cosa nostradamus/that's very smart brothers with future vision timeless/don't know who I'd be if Kanye ain't get with Rhymefest/used to wanna be someone else, now I wanna be honest/used to think it was jus me, bj penn and mike Bibby/

[grownupkid94]

Name

All I wanna do is profit off my own name/the same way my favorite rappers made their money off cocaine/80s, that’s when my parents learned who they really were/every day I look in the mirror I look less familiar/lines in my face but black don’t crack/pipe bomb like CM Punk, still hoping he comes back/like the cubs did in game five/2016, thank Montero and Montgomery I’m alive/wasn’t raised in the city but I’m still a Chicago-getter/and Hawaii still home, you know I can’t forget her/learned my science from rakaa and my inglish from Chuck/Midwestside connection like when K. Lamar’s family bumped/out to LA, but I don’t go anywhere near Calabasas/plotting with the queens to reach the masses/I ain’t preoccupied with glory/I jus wanna tell my story/but if there’s glory in my story, call me Denzel/crazy spicy like curry, love the game like valentine/if the price is authenticity, then I can’t sell/pay me in two currencies, money and time/I prefer Apple Pay and g-shock/I prefer invested conversation, not cheap talk/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

I spent so long pushing away my emotions and trying to be the hardest motherfucker in the room that now I’m kinda having that come-down into vulnerability.

[grownupkid94]

Numb (unreleased)

It feels real but this fears real/looking at my phone, I sent it, signed, sealed/eyes glued to the screen like a breaking news reel/waiting for what your words reveal/we driving through life/you were behind the steering wheel/you my Achilles heel/

I stopped getting calls from this girl I used to see/I woulda said used to love, but I’m speaking truthfully/she didn’t seem to care when missed calls would pile up/by the time she answered what she told me messed me up/I’d given her my all and it still wasn’t enough/that’s when I realized there was no such thing as love/started asking myself it was a wonderful life/scared of my decisions trying to make it thru the night/she said she was my soul mate/instead she made my soul break/real became so fake/brushed me off, Colgate/had to keep a stone face for the family crest/left me like the hornets did, at least their aqua still stayed fresh/shoot out of a slump like my name was Steph/followed her to anything like her last name was Koresh/

It feels real but this fears real/looking at my phone, I sent it, signed, sealed/eyes glued to the screen like a breaking news reel/waiting for what your words reveal/we driving through life/you were behind the steering wheel/you my Achilles heel/

When I’m alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the fan/pretend like I’m not waiting for a message on Gram/listening to frank ocean while I’m sitting on the bus/thinking about if you and I had become us/these are fantasies, I’m more into sci-fi/dreaming about you introducing me as my guy/in Hawaii scared to drink the mai-tais/addictive and suicidal, woulda blown myself sky high/I apologize, I get sentimental after dark/seeing a birthday party as I skate past Kleinman Park/my brother asked me how to write music/I told to Luke Skywalker, stop trying and do it/at least that’s how my third eye views it/redefine the sound into something therapeutic/

It feels real but this fears real/looking at my phone, I sent it, signed, sealed/eyes glued to the screen like a breaking news reel/waiting for what your words reveal/we driving through life/you were behind the steering wheel/you my Achilles heel/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

Melthru (unreleased)

I tell her I wanna die/She tell me to call the hotline/Asking for signs/They sending numbers/And I can’t read between the lines/Decimals, commas and dollar signs/Why my calls keep getting declined/And why do I feel like you keeping me on the sidelines/I just wanna know if you’re fine/And could you really be mine/You creating a monster in your head something like Frankenstein/

She a goddess, she a muse/I’m a extroverted recluse/opposites attract like a peaceful man who packs/like a strong man with no strap/complementary like continental breakfast in the hotel/coordinated like we decided if the cops ask, we won’t tell/if I’m a monster, she a doctor/if she a monster, I’m a doctor/some days, my mind is an imposter/rain without warning like it didn’t show up on Doppler/if she decides to leave, I won’t stop her/but she might be the last thing between me and the chopper/chopper like machete, cutting off what won’t grow/chopper like a nine waiting to blow/chopper like a helicopter on the pad waiting to go/chopper like Jesse James on the west coast/ain’t seen you in a minute/hope you deserve what you’re getting/I know I gotta move on, but this home feel like a house/three days and I’ve only gone between bed and couch/might go-go to DC/somewhere they ain’t seen me/extra large slice like this song, extra cheesy/but that’s the way I feel/scary bcuz it’s real/and I still ain’t heal/thought wedding bells would peal/and it’s been days since my last meal/put my guard down, my heart died on its shield/

I tell her I wanna die/She tell me to call the hotline/Asking for signs/They sending numbers/And I can’t read between the lines/Decimals, commas and dollar signs/Why my calls keep getting declined/And why do I feel like you keeping me on the sidelines/I just wanna know if you’re fine/And could you really be mine/You creating a monster in your head something like Frankenstein/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

Weigh

Suicide been weighing on my mind/This shit robbing my sanity blind/The stars ain’t aligned/I’m running out of time/Put in the rear view, Leaving it all behind/God if you real send me a sign/

She said I look tired, I said I’m high/she said I don’t smoke that much, is everything all right/I told her I’m ready to die/and to be honest, I’m more afraid to cry/got tears for fears bcuz everybody wants to rule/the world is too deep for me to be wading in the pool/like I’m waiting for my moment/realized I gotta own it/and I’m scared I’m gonna blow it/we in the same boat, so you better start rowing/swear this whole rock is in a hard place/baby girl, let’s put a smile on that face/you wanna know how I got these scars/opened up my heart and they took me apart/did their best to put me back together/but I still feel broken when it gets to colder weather/

Suicide been weighing on my mind/This shit robbing my sanity blind/The stars ain’t aligned/I’m running out of time/Put in the rear view, Leaving it all behind/God if you real send me a sign/

The holidays are bookended by saints/two more days to realize what we ain’t/I’m not All Hallows’, I’m jus me/and I’m too late for Valentine’s Day since I was born a Pisces/and of all the fish in the sea, I guarantee you no one out there swims like me/asking if I’m mookie, wondering did I do the right thing/writing the story I’m acting in, everything on purpose, no accidents/choose my words carefully/don’t trust it if you didn’t hear it from me/kill the past like Kylo/renaissance man, driving to plastic beach bumping stylo/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

Eve

Sitting in my car on the night before Christmas/trying to figure which way would be simplest/I could drive north and never come back/or fly out west because that’s where home’s at/chase the horizon, my path lit by the sunset/never going back to Chicago bcuz that’s where the guns at/my mama helped raise my cousin, that’s where his sun set/I pretend like I’m cool like the crew on the bebop/but I’m scared I won’t be scared of the day that the beat stops/my phones ringing and it’s you, eight texts and three calls/your mama wants to meet me but I ain’t got the balls/I pop another piece of gum in my mouth/anything to help me chill the f-word out/I wanna be Squall, i wanna be Marston, I wanna be Lincoln clay/but all my heroes live a world away/I gotta be me and that’s the person I’m least comfortable being...another text asking where I’m at/I pull out of the driveway and tell her I’m getting gas/lemme get watermelon 5, mango vitamin water and the expensive gummy bears/girl behind the counter notices I’ve been growing out my hair/smile and laugh so I can turn on the charm/pass me a mega millions, won’t do any harm/back in my car and they’re playing Gambino/if I disappeared right now, wonder if she’d know/drove eight hours, stomach dropped once I crossed the border/right then is the moment I shoulda told her/...text the girl I’m in love with, told her about my dilemma/tried to remind her of our past, she said she didn’t remember/if six was nine, you’d be mine, but the letters don’t add up/and the numbers don’t lie, seen yours, knew you’d waited long enough/I’m in the driveway, I lied, trying to buy some time/I’m here and I don’t see you was your reply/I pull in and fake a smile and a kiss/lie again and tell you I wouldn’t miss this/it’s showtime, so I put on the mask/tonight I’ll dream about the day I’m free at last/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

Miss

Do I miss her or do I miss her memory/do I love her or the time she was a friend to me/when I talk to her does she even remember me/scared of loneliness, that could be the end of me/I realize now I went the wrong direction/ask myself if it’s too late for course correction/should I keep it to myself, scared of rejection/used to dream about someone like you, inception/maybe mans not hot, big Shaq/maybe I missed my shot and i can’t turn back/maybe I’m jus a ghost living in the past/maybe bcuz I’m still wearing backpacks/

My dad told me not to cry unless someone died/I didn’t cry when they found my cousin on the south side/I didn’t even cry when I attempted suicide/jus bottled it up and put it deep inside/it comes out in the music/this is almost therapeutic/I know that line is corny, but I’m still gonna use it/paraphrasing Montell Jordan, this is how I do it/I’m busted and blue/when I think of you/me and her used to be California dreaming/loving south of jersey was when I found out she a demon/now I’m back home and stay scheming/til i join the chess club and start beaming/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

God

Losing my religion, no Jesus, Buddha or Allah/used to worship Yeezus, now he can’t tell me nada/west Mesa, Filiberto’s for horchata/somewhere between an armada and a regatta/dressed up for war because the devil wears Prada/and Burberry and Gucci/airports in Europe wearing Jordans and hoodies/red eye flights and red eyes at night/landing by morning, shelter from the storming/met this girl an underworld away/before I started thinking, I knew what to say/You the kinda devil I wanna get to know/ lean your head on my shoulder/hotter than hell while the world get colder/not sure what’s talking, my ego or my dro/bought my halo from a thrift store in Florida/right when I left, dude on the street said it ain’t gold enough/I told him the year is 2019/we live in the future and replicants reign supreme/I wanna be between californicating/and at home playing house and easy-baking/guess that’s what it means to be twenty-five/ain’t halfway dead, ain’t all the way alive/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

Elements

Out of my element like aang in the fire temple/meditative mindstates so I can cleanse my mental/war for peace like tai chi and kendo/look to new directions, Buddhism and Shinto/remember to breathe and not jus the endos/nothing but amore like my name was Enzo/mean right hand like my name was hendo/wanna be smooth like my name was bendo/gotta stay low, even if I get high/swing down sweet chariot and let me ride/to my final heaven/if I was any more serious my name would be seven/learned how to be a preacher, but could never be a reverend/bow to the punk gods, reverently irreverent/breathe, but bcuz I want to/even in the light my darkness shine thru/wanna tell the youth that your dreams can’t hurt you/hard to believe when your own mind curse you/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop

[grownupkid94]

(Beat rides out)

Last call, lemme have one more dance/last night I’m in this city, gimme one more chance/look in the corner and your friends laughing at me/bcuz they know the way you’re acting with me/they don’t like me but that’s nothing new/I’m still the same Braven, jus a new pair of shoes/same attitude, some new tattoos/same person, I jus got a new hairdo/take you by the hand and walk you to the balcony/meet you on the roof, tell your friends not to follow me/not sure when I’m gonna be back under these stars/like being close, love being far/it’s not you, it’s me/so turn your phone off and dance with me/tryna show you things you ain’t never seen/take you to places you ain’t never been/arm around your waist, your hand in mine/trying to push my flight itinerary out the back of my mind/stay with you till the sun tells me I gotta go/here’s my IG, Twitter, WhatsApp and the number to my phone/if the wind ever brings me back your direction/I’ll take you to the beach and we can change our complexions/you lay next to me and tell me you don’t work for the next two days/my head says go, my heart says stay/bags packed and they sitting by your door/we’re playing mancala on your bedroom floor/I’m sorry I ain’t hear your question/I was jus thinking how you belong on the cover of essence/love the way your hair looks before you had breakfast/love the way your curves look in all those sundresses/I know I’m not the guy that’s your usual preference/westside hippie raps with nerdy references/honestly I ain’t figured out how to end this/bcuz the Pisces in me saying love is endless/I appreciate you giving me one more chance/let me take you to the beach bar so we can dance/

#lyrics #poetry #hiphop