lustforunspokenwords

[lustforunspokenwords]

I wish my body was a sacred temple A sanctuary for my mind and soul A place where tranquillity has found its home A place where I can find recourse An oasis of calm that no one dares violate That no one dares to enter without permission Not even you The one who claims to love me But you already wreaked havoc in me You already disturbed my inner peace And left your marks on me

J.N. It’s all just wishful

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[lustforunspokenwords]

There are people whose glass could be filled to the brim, almost spilling over and still, they will say they need more water, they are still thirsty. Leave such people, exclude them from your life for they’ll only make you question whether you are enough.

You can not quench their thirst. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

Before I met you home was always just a place where my bed would stand and my body would rest but now that I came to know you my body won’t find rest until your body is laying next to it. I guess home is more than just a bed to sleep in.

J.N. Without you it’s not a home anymore. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

I want to belong  To belong somewhere To a place To a person To anything I can call home Where both my body and my mind can finally rest without fears and doubts  For I've been aimlessly wandering for far too long

J.N. I’m exhausted 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

She has become weak or maybe she was never strong Perhaps she was never confident nor loud Only a faint whisper, a sigh, a mere murmur She was easy to dismiss and to oppress To neglect and to trivialise  But after years of mistreatment and suffering through external voices, it's time to not just listen to her but to carefully listen To soak up her advice To satisfy her desires And to ask her for advice before anyone else For she always knows what's really good for me

J.N My inner voice has suffered enough 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

Sometimes I feel like worn-out socks. Used and abandoned.

J.N. Sometimes often. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

I want to believe in sugarcoated lies like they are the truth   I want to eat them like cornflakes with milk I want to put the spoon into my mouth To chew and to swallow It does get better, it does get better Taste the sugar that is running down my throat But I can already feel the tears in my eyes Another spoon, and another spoon But even if the package was empty and my stomach was full The sour taste on my lips, it reveals it all

J.N. You can’t eat your feelings away.

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[lustforunspokenwords]

How fickle and unsteady my feelings are I sway backwards and forwards between happiness and sadness, joy and desperation in just a few seconds But when I think about you everything’s just calm There’s no storm of emotions in my body threatening to drown me in despair No water that is leaking from my eyes ready to make my feet wet No anchor pulling me down into the depths of depression Just a serene sea and a clear blue sky And your infectious smile that radiates inside of me

J.N. I find tranquillity in you

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[lustforunspokenwords]

You talk about the weather because you can’t endure the silence. But is it really the silence you can’t endure or is the reason for your small talk the voice in your head that judging and punishing voice of yours that is so audible when there’s dead silence that you desperately try to silence with noises and chatter?

J.N. The voice in our heads. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

The stranger I call a lover

A naked body, always seen by judging eyes of mine How odd it would be to feel gentle fingers up my spine To feel eyes that do not belong to me but to a stranger Meant to make me feel anything except for pain and danger

The stranger I call a lover Who has yet more to discover Than stretch marks and scars For there’re inner wars A whole universe of trauma and pain I hope you will still consider me sane When you have become a part of my mind Promise me to be still there to be found  In the early morning hours  For I believe in love like ours

@lustforunspokenwords

[lustforunspokenwords]

A naked body, always seen by judging eyes of mine How odd it would be to feel gentle fingers up my spine To feel eyes that do not belong to me but to a stranger Meant to make me feel anything except for pain and danger The stranger I call a lover Who has yet more to discover Than stretch marks and scars For there're inner wars A whole universe of trauma and pain I hope you will still consider me sane When you have become a part of my mind Promise me to be still there to be found  In the early morning hours  For I believe in love like ours

The stranger I call a lover 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

Forgive me for not remembering your name for my mind was thinking about the divine things your body could possibly do to mine.

J.N. Sex with strangers 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

We speak the same language but still, I can't understand you.

J.N. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

It's the people who can not love tenderly and honestly who make love cruel and dangerous and with it the world.

J.N. It’s the people not love.  

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[lustforunspokenwords]

What is it that other people could see in us but we can’t see in ourselves? I asked myself while I observed a couple exchanging affections. How he whispered to her sweet words of affection and she slightly blushed in embarrassment. How they gazed upon each other's eyes, mesmerized by what they saw in them. How he tenderly caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, longing to put his lips on hers as if they were the salvation he desperately needed. Their lips met and then they parted. It was a quick kiss. One that told an outsider that what they felt for each other was tender and innocent. She leaned into him while his arms engulfed her. Is it our worth that we can not see in ourselves but others can? Do we believe that we are not worth their kindness, their affection, their love because someone made us feel like we are not worthy of their affection? That merely existing is not enough? That breathing in and out is not enough? But a bit of air is enough to utter the words I love you. It is enough to kiss your lover. Breathing is enough to be loved.

J.N. Breathing is enough to be loved. 

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[lustforunspokenwords]

Call it lust but don’t call it nothing. Call it love.

Call it love. Call it affection. Call it passion. An ardent longing, spreading across your chest, making you want to spend the night with me, or just lust if you can’t articulate your feelings if you are too afraid to admit the truth I can forever taste on your lips. Then, only then call it lust, the pursuit of pleasure. But don’t tell me you didn’t feel anything when you eagerly covered my body in kisses. When you left your marks on my skin in a desperate attempt to be remembered on my skin and in my mind. When I invited you to be a part of me. And you opened my legs with tenderness and adoration. When you and I became one and felt suffused  with joy because it is more than lust we share every single night.

@lustforunspokenwords 

[lustforunspokenwords]

You stopped caring so I cared more. And perhaps this was my greatest mistake. To care for someone who didn’t even spend one single thought on me.Your carelessness wrecked me.

Your carelessness wrecked me.

@lustforunspokenwords

(via 24hoursopen)