reachingfortheskyasifall

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Vermouth and gin

Your lips read sin

Sharp edges

And supple skin

Drawing me towards

And drawn lines thin

#poem #poetry #lust #beauty

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I'm so hungry

Ravenous for your touch

Please let me

Let me feel your strength

Against me

On me

Within me

#poem #poetry #sexetry #sex

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Bind my wrists

With your silken hands

Cover my mouth

With your sweet scent

Caress my skin

With your velvet touch

Envelop my ears

With your sultry whispers

Take my body

With your hard demand

Steal my heart

With your strong resolve

#poem #poetry #love #sexetry #sex

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Revenge is the new taste on my lips

I will get it with a smile and a laugh

I will get it by being happy

Even after all the effort you put into making me miserable

Your effort will be for nothing

You will seethe

But I

I will go on living

With every upturn of my lips

You will fall

#poem #poetry #abuse #happiness #life

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I'm being abused

There

I finally said it

I'm scared everyday

It's not physical mostly

But my abuser does get mad and drive recklessly with me in the car

And sometimes I think I might die

Mostly it's mental/verbal

Subtle threats like "you should be careful"

I want to tell someone everything that my abuser does to try and make me feel worthless or that everything that's happening is my fault

But it's hard to admit that sort of weakness

I kept telling myself that I was strong enough to take it

But I have finally realized that I shouldn't have to be

I should feel safe in my own home

I don't think many people will understand this

But I still do feel strong

I still manage to find happiness

And see beauty

But I'm tired of it being a battle

We all have our fights to fight

But I'm sick of having it in my own home

Where I am supposed to feel safe

Even as i write this, I am fighting the urge to change this whole thing that I have written to make it sound like it is about some made up character

But I think this will be a good first step in finding my way out

#poem #poetry #life #abuse #happiness #anger #lies

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Expectation is what causes hurt

Is it possible to unlearn expectation?

#poem #poetry #life

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Simple happiness

That is what I long for

Slow meals with good company

Quality conversation where everyone listens to what the other has to say and responds

Cleaning up together

Quiet times with good books in places that feel comforting

Shared excitement for your own accomplishments and others

Peace even when you are alone alongside a sweet anticipation of when loved ones will be near again

Laughter that hurts your stomach and causes eyes to tear up

The best kind of tears

I have such longings so deeply

That is what I carry in the once empty pit in my chest

The pit that gets smaller and smaller

The closer I get to that simple happiness

#happiness #love #life #poem #poetry

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Trust is easily broken

And hard to regain

One lie to break it

And many actions

To possibly get it back

#poem #poetry #love #lies #trust

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I would stand firm

Like the ages old oak

Roots planted

Unweilding

Protective

Bearing the forces

Just to shelter

The flower behind me

If the winds were to blow

And the storm were to loose itself

Upon us all

#poem #poetry #life #love

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

You play the game of shame

I hold the burden of accountability

Only one of us

Is having fun

#poem #poetry #manipulation

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Fun house mirrors

Are not the same as mirrors

It's funny they say

It's just jokes

But when it tries to cast your image

It is an untrue image

An image you need not accept

It is not you

Only how it portays you

A party trick they say

I don't want to be at this party

#poem #poetry #life #joke #ridicule

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

The holding apart

The length of arms

The distance so forced

The mirror shows the signs of wilting

The source of illness

Seemed so clear

But now I wonder

If what I really needed

Was to have you near

#poem #poetry #life #love

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I flapped my wings for you

Made things happen

Turned the tables

With my wind

Found solutions

In the sand

Your wants were petty

Easily aquired for a butterfly

With intuition and focus

I provided that

Which you lacked

My mistake was expectation

Of a reward

Or appreciation

All I got in return

Was more expectation

#poem #poetry #life #used

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

The clock stopped

At 21

The hands ceased in their rotation

An age of loss

An age of suffering

And darkness

Loud voices

Blurred vision

Hands that shook in their waiting

For the clock hands to show them how to move again

There was no forward

Only staying as still as possible

As to not be noticed

As to not upset

But the clock started again

Last year

And it's 22 now

But in the wrong time

The hands started moving

But they're angry now

They know something is missing

Somethings been lost

Taken

Stolen

No one should mess with time

#poem #poetry #life #pain #abuse #suffering #im back #anger

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

Empty was the shell

A few had made their home there

But they all moved on eventually

They tried to stay

But at some point they just did not fit

And the shell had its limits

Some stayed even past those limits

And the shell began to crack

Some tried to ignore those cracks

And continue on

But the disregard for those limits

Caused the shell to be uncomfortable to them

There were sharp edges that poked

And cold that seeped in

The shell no longer felt like home

#poem #poetry #home #abuse #love

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I thought this was the one home

Where I wouldn't have to earn my place

Where I wouldn't have to prove that I should be there

This was supposed to be my home too

Our home

But it was just yours along

I was just an intruder and didn't even know it

#poem #poetry #life #pain #home #hate

[reachingfortheskyasifall]

I miss being a daughter

I miss something I never fully experienced

But we were getting somewhat closer

And I miss the progress

And the new feelings

Why did you have to have your life taken

Before we could get there

Or at least continue to grow in that direction

Now I live with the reluctant envy

Of others that know or knew a parents unconditional love

I want to only be happy for them

Envy is not in my nature

But this is the one thing that pushes me over that edge

I just want for that knowing

That feeling

That someone loved me beyond a doubt

I long for a parents love

Or at least the memory of

#poem #poetry #love #life #death