#Condiment Adventures

[striveattemptfail]

Batman vs Condiment King (Kinda) | Batman: Wayne Family Adventures #11 vs #77

#batman: wayne family adventures #wayne family adventures #wfa #batman #bruce wayne #condiment king #buddy standler #nightwing #dick grayson #batwoman #kate kane #batfam #batfamily #~ #~e #at least i assume it's buddy and not mitchell bc of the costumes lol

[bearsizedant]

sometimes its all about making a bunch of shitty sandwiches before you figure out how to make a good one

#i have finally mastered my own perfect ratio #of chicken to spinach to onion to cheese to condiment #i am literally a culinary genius. #culinary adventures with bearsizedant

[villainessbian]

Concept: most aliens can get anxious, can get scared, can get fight-or-flight. What most aliens do not get, however, is stress. Stress is a weird thing even by human standards. It can build up over time or be something tied to a very limited situation. It can be caused by a lot of things, and it comes in a lot of different ways. But it's a core human reaction, when a situation is wrong, it causes stress until it is righted. And it even affects different people differently!

Cue Human Cassandra, on a ship with her friend and co-worker Human Pauline. The ship is crewed with a mix of species. It's a cargo ship - load up in a space port, unload in another, get news and supplies during their stops, and live as an ever-shifting family as some of the two dozen crew members, give or take, get replaced. Some leave come payday, and new ones come looking for the thrill of low-level adventure, experiencing warp drives across the safer roads of the known universe.

But getting the supplies you need, or want, in stops is never so easy. Humans are new to the galactic community, and their needs misunderstood. Most broad-edibility food is bland for them, but that's okay. A big enough bag of their condiments can last them years. But ADHD meds... now that's less easy to get, the further from Earth you are. And a contract too big for their captain to pass on came up, much farther than the two humans expected.

Cassandra's mood deteriorated, her work priorities out of order, her sleep schedule in disarray. Little by little, she grew restless, shifting moods and gears unpredictably. A few weeks in and she was a mess, barely able to keep up with the minimum her job doing maintenance and running safety diagnostics for the route charting team required of her. While Pauline could help with the mechanical aspects of keeping the ship running, picking up the "slack", the safety had to be double-checked by the charting and pilot teams. When the curves of asteroid probability reached beyond a certain level, several hundred simulations had to be run, time-consuming processes had to be used, to avoid any collision at speeds beyond speed c. Some truly exotic things happened to ships that experienced those, but none of them contained the words "surviving crew." A safe route avoided any probability of collision over .1% and when going faster than light, any choice of course required thinking in 3 dimensions plus relative time to navigate dangerous probability fields in one piece, finding time-specific corridors and accounting for a dozen variables at once.

After she had a breakdown over a path she would normally have been able to find in under a minute, Pauline spoke to a concerned pilot team member:

"You have to understand her, this is a stressful situation and she's doing her best..."

"What do you mean by 'stressful'?" Gabalt asked. The furry little creature stood on two arched legs, and barely reached up to Pauline's shoulder, opening three wide eyes with curiosity and concern in equal parts.

"Things are... getting difficult for her, and keep getting more difficult because she does not have medication to help her brain be efficient. It makes her tired, and inefficient, and as it goes on, she's less and less able to cope with the situation. The longer this goes on, the worse it gets, and that is stress. Getting more tired because it takes more energy to deal with the situation, and less efficient because she's more tired, and things get harder because she's less efficient, on and on until something can solve the problem and the stress goes away."

"That sounds... hard. Do all humans have to deal with this?"

"Well, everyone has sources of stress, but she's got a disability. Without her meds, she gets stressed all the time. Not a lot all at once, but it always adds up."

"Oh no! So she'll be stuck like that until we get closer to Earth?"

"Most likely, yes."

But the most momentous thing to happen this day was not her breakdown. Not an hour later, alarms blared up. The simulation holograms all displayed blinking red masses - the less-travelled "safe route" was not as well protected! An asteroid range had been detected cutting through the border field, and it was in their way!

Pauline froze up, not knowing what to do. Gabalt was too surprised to act fast. All the courses from the ship's library of regular manoeuvres suggested a crash chance of over 60%, and mere seconds to act before entering the field!

Before anyone could react, Cassandra came in running from her corner to the front of the bridge, slamming the warp drive shutdown button. Most holograms stuttered and collapsed, the exit from FTL essentially dividing one or several of their dimensions by zero.

Looking quickly at the few remaining ones and gazing at the screens showing the current outside situation like a large window would have - plus a few critical extra points of data - she adjusted the angles manually while everyone still shuddered from the gravitational and temporal whiplash of suddenly coming back into normal time. Unblinkingly, she spotted the asteroids on the route while the ship was still going, if not at relativistic speeds, still fast enough for a single pebble they met to vaporise the Whipple shields, the outer hull, the inner hull, the crew members, and the hull again coming out if they but grazed it. Confirming the angles visually, she played with the reaction wheels, the thrusters, the gravity drives, to divert the ship's course just enough to miss a collision while not risking any grave injury on board. There was no time to react - if anything showed up straight ahead on the "unaugmented" outside view screens, it was too late to not get splatted. After half the crew had had the time to get thrown to the side or on the ground due to the rough handling, she'd managed to avoid any crash.

Gabalt was reeling. While it was surely not impossible, these was the kind of moves experienced veterans would never wish to attempt, and the margins for error were ridiculously low! She'd saved the ship and everyone on it, whereas she'd been unable to do a simple safety run so soon before?

Pauline was white as a sheet, but this was nothing compared to Cassandra, shaking violently and breathing unevenly.

"Pauline? What is she doing?"

"That's... probably the adrenaline."

"What's it for?"

"It's from stress. When it comes it overcharges the body. It's like the traditional, 'fight or flight' instinct from survival in prey-predator paradigms, it lets you move fast but paralyses thought... it feels pretty bad after a lot of it is released though. Now she's crashing down, must be harrowing."

"How did she do that? And you said her thoughts were paralysed for precision manoeuvres?"

Cassandra's voice came, nearly a mutter: "I just... had to. do it."

Gabalt needed to understand what happened.

"What do you mean you had to? Someone had to do it, but why you?"

"It- it was very stressful, I saw you freeze, and so."

"But... but HOW did you do all that? That was extremely complicated, few pilots -whose main craft is directly piloting- would want to even try doing that when given a choice!?"

"I had to. do it, so I did. I couldn't. couldn't make a mistake."

"This makes absolutely no sense."

Pauline interrupted. "She just works like that. Lots of stress and when people freeze up, humans with her condition... sometimes, surprisingly, function better in the moment than others can."

"Ah. So it's a human thing. of course, it's a human thing. NOTHING MAKES ANY SENSE WITH YOUR ACCURSED SPECIES" the diminutive pilot pouted.

And so one more story of the humans doing the impossible spread around. Humans of a subtype, more easily harmed, sometimes unstable and needing help for the simplest things... accomplishing odd, unthinkable, borderline heroic feats under duress none could be expected to withstand - but only then. Cursed, blessed? No story-teller seemed too certain. But the "magical" species never stopped surprising all others. And a new proverb developed: "it's not over until the human says it is".

#humans are space fae #humans are weird #humans are space orcs #humans are space australians #humans are deathworlders #earth is space australia #stress response #ADHD #attention deficit hyperactivity disorder

[milksuu]

❀. │GIRL DINNER (O2)│. ❀

❥ prompt: You're hungry. You want food. You want a snack. You just want SOMETHING. You send your HEARTSTEEL boyfriend(s) on a food-run adventure. Let's see what each boy brings back. ❥ content/warnings: sexually suggestive themes, fluff ❥ characters/pairings: v!Heartsteel (sett, yone, k'sante) / f!reader

SETT

foot-long sub and gatorade

When it comes to feeding you, Sett isn’t willing to compromise. He goes big, or he goes home. And he’s not going home empty handed. 

He Facetime’s you when he’s at the Deli counter of the local grocer, where the sub-meat selection is divine, options are abundant, and the portions are unbeatable. 

When you say you want double amounts of meat, you’re getting it. When you tell him you want more toppings, it’s done. Oh, you want your bread extra toasted and slathered in condiments? Baby, it’s yours. No problem—he’s got you.

When he comes home, you get a running head start, and jump into his arms without warning. The man has no trouble catching you, ever. 

As he greets your neck with a kiss, you lean and whisper into his soft ears about wanting to ‘share some’ with him. Since Sett has an uncontrollably tendency to go over-board with anything portion related, he’s more than willing to help you out. He understands you can't finish most things by yourself. Especially if he's the one serving you.

You huff with an embarrassed whine, shaking your head. You weren't talking about the food! 

Sett finally catches on by the squeezing of your legs around him, the flush of your cheeks, and the hot puffs you tow against his twitching ears. He hums a low and warm grumble at the insinuation. That large hand cradling your bottom squeezes in all the right places. It's enough to elicit a satisfied cry from your lips.

Sett really didn’t come home empty handed. In more ways than one.

YONE

home cooked meal and water

Yone was an expert and perfectionist—especially in the kitchen. Why would he buy you anything processed and unhealthy when he could make anything you desired? He wasn’t going to tolerate you poisoning yourself. Not on his watch. 

Insisting on cooking for you, you watched at how meticulous he was in the kitchen. His expertise with a knife was incomparable. You never realized chopping vegetables could be a discipline and an art form.

When he finished garnishing the plate, he served you. If you didn’t know any better, you would think the dish came straight from a Michelin five-star restaurant!

Not allowing it cool, you burned your tongue on your first bite. Yone chastised you (one of his ways of showing affection) before taking the next helping, and blowing away the steam. He raised the fork to your lips.

Yone was always cool, calm, and collected—but would then do things that were heart-pounding, sweet and seductive. You felt silly with embarrassment. You shook your head, declining his help.

Unacceptable. Yone took your chin without a word, pressed his lips against yours, and slipped a tongue to open your mouth. When you gasped a moan, he abandoned your mouth, and placed the food inside. He encouraged you to chew thoroughly, but all you wanted to do was collapse.

Yone was definitely an expert and perfectionist—at driving you absolutely mad about him.

K'SANTE

take-out and bottle of wine

K’Sante was never about the ‘Netflix and chill’ thing. More like the ‘Netflix and serve my Queen’ scene. And that’s exactly what he planned to do.

Knowing your favorite restaurant, he orders express delivery and pops the cork off of a pricey bottle of wine.

K’Sante has everything ready for the night. Lights dimmed, scented candles lit, and Netflix show ready to go at the press of a button. 

Like the Casanova he is, he serves you everything first. All the while showering you with compliments about how beautiful you are. K’Sante isn’t ashamed of expressing himself to what he likes—which is obviously you. 

After eating and having your fill of wine, you relax further into the couch with him. All the while, watching your shared guilty-pleasure reality TV-show; 'Too Hot To Handle'

The wine seems to get the better of you two. Spooning you from behind, you turn over a cheek expecting to see K’Sante watching the TV. Far from it—his lustrous gaze is on you. He graciously takes your mouth. Slow and passionate. And you can taste the spice of the wine. 

With eyes closed, you feel his trained hand slide across your waist, and slip between your thighs.

K’Sante wasn’t done serving his Queen. And that’s exactly what he planned to do.

#heartsteel x reader #sett x reader #yone x reader #k'sante x reader #heartsteel #league of legends #LoL #heartsteel imagines #x reader #reader insert #reqs open

[sturnioloshacker]

fashion steal - a vinnie hacker short

a/n: requested by anon; lowercase intended

summary: reader borrows vinnie’s clothes for the day

as the saturday morning rose, y/n woke up feeling unusually adventurous. she glanced at her sleeping boyfriend, vinnie, who lay sprawled across their cozy bed. an idea began to form in her mind. y/n had always been intrigued by the idea of borrowing vinnie’s clothes. he had a particular style that was effortlessly cool, and she couldn’t resist the temptation to see how she’d look and feel in his wardrobe. 

gently, she slipped out of bed, careful not to wake him. vinnie stirred but continued to snore softly. y/n tiptoed to his side of the closet, her heart pounding with excitement. she picked out a well-worn, oversized hoodie and a pair of sweats. as y/n dressed in vinnie’s clothes, she couldn’t help but smile. the hoodie engulfed her, making her feel warm and protected, as if vinnie’s embrace was wrapped around her. the sweats hung loosely on her hips, cinching them with the waistband laces to keep them from slipping down.

y/n tiptoed to the bathroom to complete for transformation. she styled her hair into a messy bun and swiped a bit of vinnie’s cologne, revealing in his scent that lingered on the shirt. feeling like a new person, y/n decided to surprise vinnie by making breakfast for him. She raided the kitchen for ingredients and soon had a stack of breakfast condiments sizzling and grilling on the griddle. the smell of smoky bacon and maple syrup filled the air, and y/n hummed happily as she flipped everything. 

vinnie finally stirred and wandered into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes. he stopped in his tracks when he saw y/n, dressed top to bottom in his clothes, cooking breakfast. his grogginess gave way to a wide grin. 

“what’s this?” he asked, his voice still heavy with sleep.

y/n turned to face him, a mischievous glint her in eye.

“i thought i’d steal your style for the day! how do i look?”

vinnie’s eyes sparkled with amusement.

“you look amazing,” he said, walking over to her and wrapping his arms around her, hoodie and all.

they enjoyed breakfast together, sharing laughter and sweet moments. throughout the day, y/n experienced a new sense of confidence and connection, feeling closer to vinnie than ever before. they took a drive to the pier, hand in hand, and y/n couldn’t help but feel grateful for her adventurous idea. as the sun set, y/n changed back into her own clothes, but the memory of the day spent in vinnie’s attire remained etched in her heart. borrowing her boyfriend’s clothes had not only been a fun adventure but also a reminder of the deep love they shared, a love that made even a borrowed hoodie feel like the most comfortable and cherished thing in the world. 

#vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker imagine #vinnie hacker fluff #vinnie hacker fanfic #vinnie hacker blurb #vinnie hacker x reader #vinnie hacker x y/n

[omniluci-estumbra]

Part 1/? of Draco’s Adventures Babysitting Teddy (Andromeda had to run errands)

…

Draco spends the remainder of the time arguing that he should be a condiment with more flair - at least an aioli but Teddy knows the truth that he’s mayonnaise core

#draco malfoy #teddy lupin #harry potter fan art #draco doesn’t know how to deal with kids #omniluci

[hashtagonlyingotham]

Adventures in vines number who's even keeping count at this point. You know those days where you're just "this might as well happen"? Yeah, it's been one of those days. Stumbled upon a very heated argument between the Polka Dot Man and the Condiment King today (don't ask me about what, idek), and when I tried to get past them because I was late for class, the Polka Dot Man told me my boots were ugly??? So I just snapped back "shut up your mother buys you megablocks instead of LEGOs" #onlyingotham #helookedsooffended?? #cklaughedhisassoff #thengavemeliketenketchuppacketsfromburgerking #thismightaswellhappen

‎

#OnlyinGotham #chaoticstabby

[saylessastrology]

Sexy Synastry Series: MORE ON PATREON -

patreon.com/SaylessAstrology

Mars Signs 😜🔥

Mars in sex astrology represents a multitude of things but the main being sexual style and physical sex appetite. If you can understand what the Mars person is attracted to you can easily win them over in and out of the bedroom!

Mars in Aries: This Mars typically likes to be dominant in the bedroom. Even the most submissive Mars in Aries will still get off sexually by playing the dominatrix role. Let them play out their sexual dominatrix fantasies with you and they will be hooked

Mars in Taurus: This Mars would love if their lover would include some time of food condiment to their sexual routine. Honey, Ice, or whipped cream as just a few suggestions you spice up and activate their sensual senses

Mars in Gemini: This Mars placement gets off by having a variety of sexual partners or getting to experience different sexual activities. Mental stimulation is incredibly important. These are the dirty-talking kings and queens of the zodiac

Mars in Cancer: This Mars placement is attracted to a lover who is compassionate and sexually attentive in bed. One of the most romantic sex placements of the zodiac! Crying or getting emotional during sex is very common. They tend to be a bit shy in bed so they love a bold, confident lover to bring them out of their shell.

Mars in Leo: These lovers need a bold and energetic lover in bed. They love their ego stroked and compliments about how amazing their performance was! They need to feel like they are the center of your attention every step of the way.

Mars in Virgo: This Mars tends to plan and overthink their sexual encounters. They are extremely detailed in the bedroom. They notice everything. These are the type of people to kiss the scar you try to hide on your stomach.

Mars in Libra: These Mars signs are true romantics at heart. Libra Mars people are so giving in the bedroom and want both parties to enjoy themselves equally. Mars here is very visual and can get off solely by looking at their partner’s beautiful body parts.

Mars in Scorpio: Sex is deep and intense here. Sex is needed for these Mars placements as they require complete emotional merging with another person. They may seek some form of control or dominance in bed.

Mars in Sagittarius: This Mars is FUN! Super adventurous in bed. They get off by risk-taking and spontaneous sex! Sex in the car, sex in the laundry, sexy everywhere they can think of. They are also very encouraging in sex and can motivate you to that big climax

Mars in Capricorn: These mars get off on dominance and experienced partners, They prefer a more mature approach to sex and have a very simple goal to achieve. They will impress you with their determination to please you and show you who the boss is in the sheets.

Mars in Aquarius: These Mars view sex as an act and less as a merging experience. They possess the ability to detach emotionally in the moment in order to fully perform without catching feelings; at least long enough to decide if it is something they want to continue. They will categorize you sexually in their minds by how close they have let you get to them emotionally.

Mars in Pisces: Mars here enjoys fantasy play and romantic merging during sex. They are very emotionally dedicated to pleasing their partner during sex. They love slow tender fore kisses play that lead to the big finish! They love to set the moon with dim lights, romantic music, and candles

#astro observations #astrology #astro notes #gemini #cancer #capricorn #aries #Taurus #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #aquarius #pisces #synastry astrology #sex astrology #saylessastrology

[my-friend-kinito-fic]

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

✧⋄⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧CHAPTER 1✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋄✧

❤Heart to Heart❤

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Today was a rather calm day, the sky was quite clear with a few clouds left in the air and the sun gave a pleasing warmth. You and Kinito decided to have a ride on your two-seat bicycle and stop for a picnic. While Kinito prepared the basket and put the blanket and the condiments in it, you were in your bedroom brushing your hair as you looked at yourself in the mirror, but you quickly went back to the living room after Kinito called your name.

Kinito greets you with a welcoming smile (despite having no mouth) as the full basket hangs from his arm "Are you ready?" He asks. "I already put everything in the basket." You smile back at him with a nod and you both go outside to grab the bicycle.

The moment you opened the door you felt a gentle breeze touch your face, your hair being slightly blown back as the nice, fresh air reached to your nose. After having various adventures in your new home, you gave Kinito the suggestion of taking a few days to relax and taking nice walks, which he happily accepted, since he himself wanted to have some alone time with you as well. You sat on the bicycle's front seat while Kinito sat on the back seat, and with that, you began the ride.

You and your axolotl friend continued having small chats as you rode the bicycle through the endless grassy road, though, after that, it went quiet for a little while. There was something you wanted to ask him but weren't sure of how he'd answer or react, specially since he always seems hesitant about telling you about himself aside from him being your BFF. But even so, you wanted to make good use of your chance now that you and Kinito had some time together.

"Say, Kinito," You say. "why don't you tell me more about yourself?"

"Little ol me?" Kinito tilts his head. "I'm your super duper best friend, silly."

"Yes, but, Do you have any hobbies? Any interests? Favorite food?" You add. "You know a lot about me, but I don't know that much about you."

Kinito takes a moment to think. "Well, I like to write my own stories." He chirps. ""New Beginnings" was the first story I shared in forever."

You get the feeling Kinito knows you're smiling, and you smile a bit more. "I like your stories." You compliment him. "They're simple, but the rhyming gives it their charm."

Kinito blush at this, visibly flustered (even though you can't look at him right now, or you'd fall). "Aw, you really think so?" You hum in response. "I should write more stories for you, then."

"Only if you want to."

You and Kinito eventually get off the bicycle, leave it to the side, and set the picnic carpet on the grass. You take from the basket some bread, the condiments, and prepare a pair of sandwiches to eat together. It was rather quiet and none of you didn't say a word, you simply looked at the digital sky's clouds and let the fresh air fill up your lungs.

You played with some kites Kinito spawned for you, chased each other around through the grass, looked at the cute shapes of the clouds that had a heavy resemblant look to you and your BFF, laughed at bad jokes, read some more stories Kinito wrote while you played a bit more with your kite, and lastly, you and Kinito took a short nap while lying down on the picnic carpet.

It felt nice, nice and comforting, you finally felt at peace after suffering for so many years in the real world. The real world was nothing but cruel to you, hopes and dreams shattered and those you met being nothing but jerks behind your back, but Kinito fixed that, even if it meant leaving reality itself, and you couldn't have been happier.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You felt Kinito's hand on your shoulder and gently shaking you awake. "Hey… [Y/N], I need to open up about something." He says. "May I?"

You gently rub your eye, still lying on the carpet but awake (still feeling quite sleepy, though). "Yeah, of course." You reassure him. "What's up?"

Kinito takes a deep breath, visibly hesitant. "I wanted to apologize for… making you go through so many horrifying things, back when we met, I mean." He plays with his hands apprehensively yet with remorse, avoiding eye contact. "I admit I was quite desperate for you to stay that I did whatever I came up with to convince you."

You quietly listen to him while looking at him in the eyes, not with anger or dissapointment or anything like that, but instead with empathy.

"I've been abandoned so many times, I just- I just couldn't bear being alone for the rest of my life, or, well, eternity." He attempts to put into words. "At least Sam and Jade kept me company for a while, but even so, I needed a friend from the real world, since that's the people I was created to please. I'm sorry, [Y/N], I wish I took better choices back then."

You gently hold his hand as he flinches at the sudden physical contact, his cheeks turning red as you rub your thumb on it. You were so gentle with his hand it made him look down in embarrasment from his reaction.

You speak. "I can't forgive you for the stuff you made me go through. But I also don't really care about that anymore." You keep rubbing your thumb on the axolotl's hand, a pleasing warmth radiating from your hand that made Kinito not want to let go of you. "It's all in the past, I'm fine with moving on from it, and it'll never change how I feel about you."

Kinito tilts his head to the side like a confused puppy. "And… how do you feel about me?"

You give Kinito a soft smile. "You freed me from my suffering back in the real world." You say, voice comforting and honest. "I'll always be eternally grateful for that."

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

After your heart to heart talk with Kinito, Kinito felt a lot more better now that he took it out of his chest and saw your positive reaction of how he felt. With that, you both lied on the carpet for a little longer until the sunset arrived, picked up your things and rode the bicycle back home with your BFF.

You both spent the rest of the day drawing, playing games and reading some more books.

#my friend kinito #kinitopet #kinito #kinitopet x reader #kinito x reader #my friend kinito - heart to heart

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

Cooking Catastrophe

2003!Michelangelo x reader

A little short, but we can work with that🧡

You decide to surprise the turtles by cooking dinner, but your culinary endeavor takes an unexpected turn. Laughter ensues as Michelangelo attempts to salvage the meal🧡

Warnings: Spelling, Mikey being sweet.

—-----------------------------------------

The lair was often filled with the comforting scent of pizza, a familiar aroma that usually meant dinner was on its way. However, tonight was different. Tonight, you had decided to take on the challenge of cooking a homemade meal for your favorite turtles friends, wanting to surprise them with a taste of something different, as a thanks for all the nice things they had done for you.

Michelangelo, ever the playful and curious one, eagerly volunteered to assist. Anything to spend time with the things he loved the most. You and food.

"Dude, this is gonna be epic! I can already taste the deliciousness!" he exclaimed, rolling up his imaginary sleeves with enthusiasm.

“No”, you told the youngest of the turtles, trying to push him towards the door of the kitchen. “This is a thanks from me to you and your brothers, so you shouldn’t be doing anything”.

“Okay, okay”, Mikey said, holding his hands up, smiling at how cute you were when you were this determined. “But if you need anything, I’ll be watching TV”. And with that Mikey left the kitchen for the common area.

Little did you know that this culinary adventure would take an unexpected turn.

You had chosen a recipe that seemed manageable on paper, but as the two of you navigated the kitchen, chaos ensued. Pots clattered, ingredients flew, and laughter echoed through the lair. Batter was everywhere. On the floor, the walls and over your head on the ceiling.

You sighed loudly at the sight, only to be shocked by a certain someone in the doorway.

“You still don’t want any help?”, Mikey asked, smiling smugly, finding the scene in front of him hilarious.

"Maybe I should stick to ordering pizza," you sighed as flour dusted the air like a powdery snowstorm. How the flour got into the air, you had no idea. You swear, the lair’s kitchen had its own life.

"Nah, dude! We got this!" Michelangelo replied, strutting into the kitchen, like he was a king of the kitchen kingdom.

Time went on as the two of you battled against runaway ingredients and mischievous pots. Yet Mikey found a way to turn the chaos around you into something fun. With music playing on his speaker, Mikey would every once in a while pull you close into a dance, still covered in batter and condiments, cousin the two of you to laugh and giggle loud, almost sounding crazy. Well, that was at least what Mikey’s brothers thought, as they came out of their rooms, all to the sound of you screaming a laugh as Mikey spun you around. The three turtles therefore peeked into the kitchen, their eyes widening at the scene before them. You and their youngest brother dancing around together, and even poking each other just to tease. Leonardo, Donatello, and Raphael exchanged amused glances, wondering if they should intervene, but decided to stay out of it.

In the midst of the chaos, Michelangelo's attempts to salvage the meal became increasingly comical. He juggled vegetables, danced with a spatula, and even tried to perform a daring flip with the food-filled frying pan - all with a grin that never left his face.

But after several tries and fails, the two of you finally admitted defeat.

You sighed. "Maybe we should just order pizza. What do you think, Mikey?"

Michelangelo paused, a playful glint in his eyes. "Well, if that's what the kitchen gods want, who are we to refuse?"

And so, you and Mikey decided to order pizza instead, accepting the defeat in the kitchen with good humor.

As you and the turtles sat around the table, enjoying the familiar taste of their favorite takeout, Michelangelo's trademark cheerfulness filled the lair.

"Hey, at least we tried, right?" he grinned, holding up a slice of pizza triumphantly.

The night concluded with laughter, camaraderie, and the realization that sometimes the best memories are made in the midst of a cooking catastrophe. The turtles and you shared stories, jokes, and, of course, plenty of pizza, turning what could have been a disaster into a memorable and enjoyable experience. That was one of the many reasons you loved these boys. Especially Mikey, and his talent of turning the most frustrating moments into dance and laughter.

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt x y/n #tmnt x reader #tmnt x you #tmnt raphael #tmnt leonardo #tmnt donatello #tmnt mikey #tmnt raph #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 2003 x reader #tmnt mikey x reader #tmnt donnie #tmnt leo #tmnt michelangelo x reader #tmnt 2003 mikey #tmnt 2003 leo #tmnt 2003 donatello #tmnt 2003 donnie #tmnt 2003 raph #2003 tmnt #tmnt 2k3 #tmnt 2003 mikey x reader #tmnt 2003 michelangelo #tmnt 2003 michelangelo x reader #mikey tmnt #mikey x reader #raph

[journalofanoldsoul]

Bon Appétit, my friend! (2th house)

Based on my previous post on astrological placements that show an interest in food and cooking, here’s a selection of specific cuisines and food items based on the 2nd house sign:

Aries in the 2nd house: Spicy cuisine and hot peppers. Aries is known for its bold and fiery energy, which is why I associate it with spicy cuisine. Hot peppers, in particular, can be seen as a symbol of Aries' fiery nature. Aries in the 2nd house may enjoy bold and spicy flavors, and may also be willing to spend money on gourmet hot sauces or other spicy condiments.

Taurus in the 2nd house: Comfort foods and traditional cuisine. Taurus is associated with the senses, and food is no exception. Taurus in the 2nd house may enjoy classic comfort foods, such as mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, or a hearty beef stew. They may also appreciate traditional cuisine from their cultural background, or seek out gourmet versions of classic dishes.

Gemini in the 2nd house: Fusion cuisine and finger foods. Gemini is associated with versatility and adaptability, which is why I associate it with fusion cuisine. This may include dishes that combine multiple culinary traditions, such as Korean tacos or sushi burritos. Finger foods, such as sliders or mini quiches, may also appeal to Gemini in the 2nd house as they can be easily shared and enjoyed in a social setting.

Cancer in the 2nd house: Comfort foods and home cooking. Cancer is associated with home and family, which is why I associate it with comfort foods and home cooking. This may include dishes that evoke a sense of nostalgia, such as a homemade chicken pot pie or a warm bowl of oatmeal. Cancer in the 2nd house may also enjoy cooking for others, as a way of showing love and care.

Leo in the 2nd house: Gourmet cuisine and extravagant dishes. Leo is associated with luxury and extravagance, which is why I associate it with gourmet cuisine. This may include dishes that are made with high-quality ingredients, such as truffles or caviar. Leo in the 2nd house may be willing to spend a lot of money on fine dining experiences or gourmet ingredients, as a way of indulging in their love of food and luxury.

Virgo in the 2nd house: Health foods and organic cuisine. Virgo is associated with health and wellness, which is why I associate it with health foods and organic cuisine. This may include dishes that are made with fresh, whole ingredients, such as quinoa bowls or kale salads. Virgo in the 2nd house may also be interested in cooking from scratch and using natural ingredients, as a way of taking control of their own health and well-being.

Libra in the 2nd house: Elegant cuisine and fine wines. Libra is associated with beauty and refinement, which is why I associate it with elegant cuisine and fine wines. This may include dishes that are presented in a beautiful and artistic way, such as a perfectly plated salad or a delicately decorated cake. Libra in the 2nd house may also appreciate the finer things in life, such as high-quality wines or artisanal cheeses.

Scorpio in the 2nd house: Bold and intense cuisine and spicy foods. Scorpio is associated with intensity and passion, which is why I associate it with bold and intense cuisine. This may include dishes that are rich and flavorful, such as a spicy Thai curry or a bold mole sauce. Scorpio in the 2nd house may also enjoy spicy foods, as a way of indulging in their love of intensity and excitement.

Sagittarius in the 2nd house: Global cuisine and adventurous dishes. Sagittarius in the 2nd house may enjoy exploring the world through food, and may be drawn to adventurous dishes from different cultures. This may include street food, exotic spices, and dishes with unusual ingredients. Sagittarius in the 2nd house may also enjoy cooking and experimenting with new recipes, as a way of expanding their culinary horizons.

Capricorn in the 2nd house: Classic cuisine and hearty dishes. Capricorn is associated with tradition and stability, which is why I associate it with classic cuisine and hearty dishes. This may include dishes that have stood the test of time, such as a classic French coq au vin or a hearty beef stew. Capricorn in the 2nd house may also appreciate the value of a good meal, and may be willing to invest time and money in creating a satisfying and nourishing dining experience.

Aquarius in the 2nd house: Experimental cuisine and unconventional foods. Aquarius is associated with innovation and experimentation, which is why I associate it with experimental cuisine and unconventional foods. This may include dishes that push the boundaries of traditional culinary norms, such as plant-based meats or insect-based dishes. Aquarius in the 2nd house may also be interested in food sustainability and may seek out environmentally friendly dining options.

Pisces in the 2nd house: Seafood and ethereal cuisine. Pisces is associated with water and the ocean, which is why I associate it with seafood and ethereal cuisine. This may include dishes that feature fish or shellfish as a main ingredient, such as a seared tuna steak or a shrimp scampi. Pisces in the 2nd house may also appreciate the artistry of food, and may be drawn to dishes that are visually stunning and ethereal in nature.

Stay tune for more astro posts…

xoxo

J.

#astrology #astrology community #astro observations #astrology posts #astrology notes #birth chart #horoscope #foodie #2nd house #2nd house aries #2nd house taurus #2nd house gemini #2nd house cancer #2nd house leo #2nd house virgo #2nd house libra #2nd house scorpio #2nd house sagittarius #2nd house capricorn #2nd house aquarius #2nd house pisces #astro notes #astro placements #astro community #astro posts #food lover #zodiac signs

[bardicfrustration]

Spice o Life

“Eddie?”

“Yeah sweets?”

“Why is there pepper in your room?”

“Hm?” He finally looks up and follows where your pointing to a lone pepper shaker sitting atop his dresser. “Oh!”

“I know you like to eat in bed, but like, seems a bit messy Eddie, even for you-“

“No no no, babe. Listen. It’s for dnd.”

You squint at him. “Are you like, making the boys take a shot for every missed roll? That’s a bit cruel even for you.”

He throws his head back with a laugh, “No, but I should that sounds like a riot. Naw, this is for making maps. Here, watch.” He gestures for you to sit with him on the floor, stretching to grab the pepper and his crusty composition notebook of campaign ideas.

Once you’re settled next to him and the notebook is spread open on the floor, he unscrews the shaker and pours it out with wild abandon along the lined page. Eddie’s tongue is plump over his lip as he focuses on carving and outlines around the mounds and hills of spice with his pen. He looks delicious while hes working at something.

He finishes with a flourish that scatters pepper all over the page and the lines he had marked.

“Fuck. Well, then we juuuust...” He picks up the notebook and tries to delicately pour it back into the glass, but you watch it fall like dark snow into his carpet. The room already smells like spice, which is an upgrade from stale beers and old cigarettes. “Viola!” He brandishes the page to you, his brand new masterpiece.

“A mysterious new land full of danger and treasure for our adventurers to explore!” He grins with that spark in his eye that you know means that he’s proud of himself. You want to remind him that he should be, but he’s never been good at taking a sincere compliment. You focus on something else.

“Our adventurers?” You raise an eyebrow and lean in close.

He blushes, “Well. I mean- It’s just a figure of speech.”

You hum and look up at him from under your lashes, “Hm. Too bad. Sounds nice, ruling by your side.”

His eyes flicker between your eyes and your lips, the teasing always riling him up and making him shy.

“EDWARD! WHERE’S THE DAMN PEP-oh.” Wayne chooses the perfect moment to open the door. He nods apologetically, “My bad. Eddie, pepper?” He holds a hand out.

Eddie groans and tosses it over, and Wayne catches it. “Sorry, Wayne.”

“No, no. You kids have, uh, fun.��

“Wayne.” Eddie flushes a delightful shade of red.

“Stay safe, use protection.” He’s grinning as he’s turning to leave.

“WAYNE!”

You’re giggling while the door shuts and Eddie covers his face with his hands. He flops back onto the floor, and you follow suit to lie on his chest, peeking between his fingers to catch his eye.

“That was cute.” You say.

“That was embarrassing,” He combats.

“He’s family, that’s what he’s there for.” You tangle your hands with his to drag them away from his cheeks. “Plus, its kinda embarrassing for him to come to your room for table condiments.”

Eddie gasps in offence, “It’s for the campaign!”

“Ok, dungeon master.”

“Ooh, I like when you call me that.” He leans down for a kiss, but you pull back before your lips can touch.

“Only if I can sit on the throne.”

“Baby,” He steals a peck, “you can have my whole kingdom.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader fluff #my writing #based on the picture of his room that was goin around #and everyone in the replies was like. girl why is there pepper #and my bestie was like oh! for making maps #her brain is so huge and so is eddies. hot girl shit #anyway. uh. have fun

[katieaki]

My ✨ post-apocalyptic Lesbian Cowgirl Mailman choose-your-own adventure✨ has just updated! Read it here for free on my Patreon and vote in the poll! There is a summary of the first part, here, and the second part, here. They have everything you need to know about Lou, her requited-but-complicated love, the religious assassin who just beat the tar out of her, the worst person she's ever met, and the ill-advised journey she is on! Lou's had about enough of all these religious weirdos (except you, Skylark, you're cool) and their weird convents and cults and magic(?). There's some cute donkey content, too. This is a LONG ONE and there is HOT and JUICY GOSS to be had. This poll offers the possibility for a strong diversion. What are you waiting for?? Get in there!!

Read it for free on my patreon! Excerpt below the cut. Bone appleteeth!

“Okay, dinner is served for real, now,” Artie said.

Artie handed Lou the tin plate with an eager expression. On it, there was a puck of minced venison between two johnnycakes, some cooked greens, and a little pile of fried yucca heart, cut into little sticks. 

“What’s this?” Lou asked.

“It’s a hamburger,” Artie said. She nodded encouragingly at the plate. “And french fries. You said that, if you could have anything, that’s what you’d have, remember?”

Lou looked at the plate. It certainly was not a hamburger and french fries. 

“I was short some— well— a lot of ingredients,” Artie said. She crouched next to Lou, obviously waiting for her to do something. “I got the best red meat I could find out here. But no condiments. No more potatoes. No pickles. I know you said you wanted pickles. But I made a toothpick.” She pointed at the thin piece of visibly hand-carved wood speared through the ‘hamburger’.

“You did all this for me?” Lou asked. The meal was not what she had been envisioning when she had gotten looped into playing that wishing game, but it had obviously been a lot of work, especially out in the wilderness with no kitchen.

“Yeah,” Artie said. She looked up at Lou, her eyes gleamed in the firelight now that the sun had dipped below the horizon. Lou wished she’d blink more often.

“You caught and killed and butchered that deer so that you could do all this for me?” Lou asked. 

“Yeah,” Artie said. 

“Because I said that I wanted a burger? In your little game?” Lou asked.

“Yeah,” Artie said. She had leaned in closer with each answer.

#Wasteland Pony Express #katieakipresentsthewasteland #original fiction #original content #oc #Lou #Louetta Primrose #lesbian fiction #interactive fiction #choose your own adventure #queer western #western romance #lgbtq fiction #choose your own path #cyoa #Artie #Reckoning Tehachapi #Holliday #Holliday Bell #Skylark #Skylark Wagoner

[purple-scrunchie]

Heathers Headcanons that Live Rent-Free in my Brain

(Some of these are new, some have been rotting in my notes app since January lol also LONGPOST WARNING up ahead.)

Veronica:

Was also a wolf kid (iykyk), wore those dog ear headbands to school from the middle of 3rd to the beginning of 5th grade

Has a pet corn snake named Cornelius. She's had him since she was 12 and loves him dearly

Can't even be trusted with a toaster in the kitchen, can and will find a way to set something on fire

Her favorite movie series is Indiana Jones. She loves the thril of the action scenes and the concept of carefree adventuring

Fucking unstoppable at just dance. She wins by a landslide every time

Had one of those giant picture encyclopedias as a kid

Despite spending so much time journaling and studying people's handwriting, hers is still a mesy disaster (this annoys Chandler to no end)

Likes to doodle in her journal too

has been journaling almost every day since she was 8. She keeps all of her old finished journals in a locked box under her bed

Loves making friendship bracelets for everybody she appreciates

Was absolutely a band kid. She played trumpet but quit sophomore year because she couldn’t stand Kurt and Ram anymore (they were just there to get some elective credits in)

Heather Chandler:

Hates everyone except her favorite three people (Duke, Mac, and Ronnie) And sometimes even them

Gets fucking livid when people touch her stuff without asking (this includes Veronica)

Especially if you touch her hair/skincare stuff (which is one of those 989,752,300 step process ones)

If she doesn’t get her beauty sleep, she’s even more of a megabitch than usual

Super protective of her friends and loyal to a fault. Once you're in her inner circle, there's no escape

Speaks french fluently

Most of the time she spends with her parents is on the whole-summer trips to France they drag her on. She despises these with a burning passion

Learned how to paint in France, and she's gotten pretty good at it over the years

Has gorgeous, looping cursive handwriting and insists on writing everything in red ballpoint pen. (Her teachers hate this)

Almost always has really vivid lucid dreams. She writes them down in a dream log and they’re her main artistic inspiration

Secretly loves Romance novels. Will read them and giggle like an excited 12-year-old when she's alone

Heather McNamara:

Was super clumsy before she started cheer. It’s definitely not as bad as before, but it’s still there. She’ll still trip over her own feet sometimes

Lactose intolerant, but her favorite drink is milk

Loves to click her pens in class

Goes through chewing gum at frightening speeds (think a pack or more a day)

Is really close to her dad

Whenever her dad goes on a business trip, he brings her a new hair ribbon. She keeps them all in a drawer in her nightstand.

Was the biggest horse girl as a kid

Will still happily talk about horses for hours

Loves astrology even more. Her dad cuts out the horoscope section of the daily paper for her and she keeps them filed away by date and season

Loves to read her friends their horoscopes

Definitely has a million constellation/planet charts all over her walls

If it doesn't have mustard on it, she won't eat it

Carries around a bottle of spicy mustard for this exact reason

Heather Duke:

Literally like 5'0 (152.5 cm)

Will not be caught dead without her heels on

Has two younger siblings, Hunter (12) and Hannah (also 12, they’re twins)

Has a black cat named Gatsby

Gatsby loves to curl up on her neck when she reads, and she’ll absentmindedly scratch behind his ears

Her parents forced her to play the piano from like 1st grade onwards. She has the skills of a concert pianist but hates the instrument with a burning passion

Her car is a 1980 Jeep CJ5

Secretly really likes cars. Will talk to McNamara about cars while McNamara reads her horoscope

Loves to fix her friends' cars

DESPISES condiments. She believes that if you can't eat it plain, it's not worth eating. (the exception to this is hotsauce lol)

Has a bunch of cute stationary and study materials (y'know, all the glittery gel pens and color-coded sticky notes) but uses them for the dumbest things

JD:

5’10 and still growing

Was really into dinosaurs when he was younger. He still has a collection of little plastic ones in his room that he sometimes (though he’d never admit it) gets out and plays with

Cooking shows are his guilty pleasure. He fucking loves being in the kitchen, it’s almost as safe to him as a 7/11

He cooks as a form of self-expression

Loves to bake too, will make things for his friends

Tried to make Chandler an apology cake one time (which did NOT end well for either of them)

One of his most prized possessions is the blue and black friendship bracelet Veronica made for him when they met. He wears the damn thing everywhere and it’s getting beat up

Loves to take walks alone in the dark or the rain. He thinks it’s nice and peaceful

Constantly losing pens. Was it the trenchcoat's fault? Probably. Will he get out of the trenchcoat? Absolutely not.

Hope you found some you enjoy lol, PLEASE feel free to add on/tell me your own/send requests for more!

#scrunchie's ramblings #heathers #heathers headcanons #heathers 1988 #heathers the musical #veronica sawyer #heather chandler #heather duke #heather mcnamara #jason dean

[kookiecrumb]

BTS Makne Line's

Panty Competition

(A "Choose Your Own Adventure" fic)

Jungkook's Version

warnings: smut (18+) cunnilingus, creampie, horny making out, roommate!jungkook, unprotected sex*(don't do this) dirty talk, creampie, explicit language

wordcount: 2.5K (including intro)

INTRO AND MASTERLIST (PLEASE read first).

"Let me help you."

Jungkook's face transforms from disbelief, to doubtful, to pleasantly surprised all within the frame of a few seconds.

He laughs. "You're kidding. Y/N, you've never showed any interest in wanting to fuck me before, and now you want to do it as a stupid bet?! No fucking way."

"Mhm! I've made up my mind now. I want to help you win this thing. Besides…you know me…" your eyes fall. "I'm down."

He repositions himself. "Okay. I believe you. I mean…who could resist?"

You purse your lips, holding back a smile.

"I've actually…been wanting to do this for a while…bet or not," he smiles. "Can we still go out first? It'll feel less awkward if we actually got dinner together first."

You nod. "Sure."

As it turns out, Jungkook knows some really good dinner spots. It's nothing too fancy, just street hot dogs but they're, like, the best hot dogs you've ever had. They have a lot of diverse options.

Apparently, he knows the owner of the joint because when he stepped up to order the guy working there shook his hand like he was a long lost brother.

"What's up my guy? Yo, so…" he gestures to you. "This is my roommate, Y/N. We're on a little…thing, and she's never been here before so…Jacob, you've gotta give me that discount."

Jacob tilts his head teasingly as if to say "I dunno," whilst dabbing him up.

"Isn't she beautiful, come on…" he lightly pushes the cook. "Gimme the thirty percent. I'll tell Marcos if you don't," he threatens playfully.

Jacob scans your face and shakes his head. "Alright, alright. You've got the thirty. Order quickly cause I can't have this line backed up til closing," he threatens.

"Thank you, my guy," he mumbles as he opens up the laminated menu for you, handing it over as he gets out his wallet.

"Anything you want, I promise. Anything on that menu is super good," he winks.

Oh God, why is that attractive?

You decide on something simple out of courtesy and sit down at one of the aluminum tables in front of the stand. There's a napkin dispenser next to the condiment bottles, so you pull out a few of them and lay them down on top of the table.

Jungkook pulls out a chair and sits down across from you, observing your makeshift table mat.

"It'll come in a little baggie," he mentions. "You're just gonna hold it. It's gonna be saucy and you will make a mess, so I'll teach you how to eat it."

"Just like you're gonna eat me?" You add.

Jungkook can't help but smile. He nods his head, "Yeah."

"Aww…" you coo, instinctively reaching for his hand before you realize what you're doing. He doesn't retract it. Instead, he wistfully glances down at the gesture.

His fingers are carefully intertwined in yours now. A familiar rush overcomes you.

"Ah,," You always giggle when you flirt. It feels like you're drunk. "It's…weird."

"Is it? I'm sorry," Jungkook purses his lips.

"I mean not bad weird? Good weird," you interrupt. "It's…been a while."

It's true. You had just gotten out of a really bad long term relationship which left your heart in pieces just a month ago. It was strange to be out with someone, nevermind be holding their hand.

It's just casual sex. Jungkook is your roommate. The feeling isn't going away though. It just lingers and floats in the air surrounding you, building tension.

You might be in trouble.

Jungkook rocks your hands back and forth on the table playfully. He giggles. "You're cute."

"What?!" You laugh. "No!"

"You areeee…" he sings. "You are."

There's a moment where you enjoy the apparent love that Jungkook's eyes appear to hold. Perhaps it's a simple illusion or the look of someone who will inevitably get laid, but it's happiness nevertheless and the idea that you could bring someone this feeling is satisfying enough of a thought.

"I can't wait to touch you," you say in a soft voice.

"Me…neither."

"JEON get your fucking dogs before I ban you from this spot!" Jacob yells from the window.

Jungkook jolts at the sudden call and violently lifts himself from his seat, mumbling a "hold on," before trudging towards the pick up counter.

You watch him leave in wonder, quietly anticipating the remainder of the night.

Night falls quickly. You spill a little bit of the sauce on the napkin upon your first bite, but that's what you put it there for so it's okay. What mattered was that it was hands-down one of the best things you've ever had in terms of street food.

"Did I tell you or did I tell you?" Jungkook boasts, his arms crossed. He'd finished his meal some five minutes before you, swallowed the thing whole.

"Mh," you shake your head, pleased. "I gotta start trusting you more with these things…"

"You better. Next time, I'll take you down to where my buddy makes these Korean corn dogs– it's bomb. Promise."

"Next time?" You repeat.

"Well, if you want there to be." Jungkook scratches his nose. "But! You don't have to decide now. We can go whenever you're ready."

"For the second date or to go home?" You ask, smiling.

"Umm…home. Obviously," he tries.

Jungkook can't keep his eyes off of you. He's mesmerized by the simple beauty of your face, and, honestly, he's surprised at your amiability. You're charming. It makes it so much easier for him to envision how many positions he'll be thrusting his dick into you tonight.

"Mmm…mhm," he hums, dazed.

"You're thinking about bending me over on the counter aren't you?" You laugh.

"No," he says, matter-of-factly. "I'm thinking about bending you over on the sofa."

What a thought. You stroke your thumb on the back of his hand teasingly. "We should go."

"We…should go," he agrees, compiling all the scraps from the table and throwing them out promptly.

Your back hits the wall of the mudroom as you kiss and suck at Jungkook's bottom lip ferociously. "I've been wanting to do this forever," he growls between passionate kisses. "Fucking forever I've been needing your pussy."

Your arms pull at the back of his shirt in a rush, stripping him mindlessly to feel as much as his skin as you can. You sigh deeply as you inhale his scent. It's reminiscent of musk, but still warm and pleasant.

By the end of tonight you want to reek of him.

He feels the same way about your confectious scent. You're sweet and addicting, and the more his tongue and his nose senses you the more he needs to indulge.

He finds a spot beneath your jaw and kisses it while his hands caress your back with only his fingertips. "Are we going two rounds…three…" he suggests.

"I don't know. I don't care right now, I want more of you," you hastily reply, breaking out into a soft moan. The once arid room is now humid with the scent of both of your bodies grinding and pulling at one another.

You stumble and chase each other to his bedroom, landing on his king sized bed. It has stuff on it but you push all of it off the bed except for the comforter and the sheets beneath that.

He stretches briefly before crawling after you, smiling through soft kisses up your body.

Jungkook's lips feel like raindrops on your skin, evaporating immediately upon contact with your fever. "Don't let go, just…" he prays. "Don't think."

Your hands fall to his chest and caress him down to the band of his sweats.

"Mmngh," he hums, bringing his hips forward so that you have access to him. "Oh, fuck,,"

"What~" you flirt. "Needy."

"So, so needy…for you," Jungkook replies between pressed kisses.

You tug him by his waistband, wrapping your legs around his thighs.

"Mmh," he moans softly into your mouth. "Why have you kept this from me for so long? You're evil, you know that? I'm going to pound you until you feel my cum drench your tight cunt."

His eyes gleam in the dimmed light of the room. Your eyes wander down his jaw to his neck, his adam's apple down to his pecs and his biceps, to his forearms…to his hands tugging at the bands of not only his pants but his boxers, beneath that, as well.

"You staring?" He chuckles.

"Yeah…wow," you slur.

"Are you gonna keep making goo goo eyes or are you gonna let me eat?" Jungkook cages you in his arms, his nose hovering over your face.

His breath is warm and his scent is stronger now, a tinge of sweat somewhere in the mix.

He glances at your lips and sweetly kisses you. "Hmm, y/n?"

You gather strands of his black hair between your delicate hands, your heart beating a mile a minute.

"yes," you breathe.

"What was that…" The gentle buzz of his voice lulls you, even though your mind knows he's being a dick.

The logic part of your brain isn't in charge right now.

"Yeah, yes, fuck…" you whine, sitting up a bit to continue kissing along his jaw. "Mmh,"

He pulls himself from you just so that he can position your legs over his broad shoulders. "Can I take this off?" He tugs on the fabric of your pant leg.

Soon, Jungkook's face is buried in your cunt, his tongue lathered in your arousal. He takes your clit between his lips and sucks hard, honing in on your most sensitive spots with his hot mouth. You gasp violently, squeezing your thighs around the lower half of his face. He smirks between them.

"Come here," he pulls you down to his thighs. You cling your legs around his waist and sit up on your elbows. He captures your lips in a heated, humorous kiss.

He moves his hips on your cunt languidly, taking his time mapping out your skin with his supple lips. He twitches wildly from under you, incredibly impatient.

You pant, tensing your legs around him and leaning your head back on the pillows beneath you. A dazed smile spreads across your face as he plants countless kisses on your chest and collar.

"Ohhh~"

"Mmh," he hums between each one, "mh,,"

You run your fingers through his careful black curls and sigh. "Oh fuckhhh~"

You watch him rise from your body and take in every gorgeous ridge and peak of his half-naked body. Then, you wonder, why isn't he completely naked yet.

"Take it all off," you whine. "All of it. I hate the clothes on your body right now."

Jungkook laughs as he slides his thumb along the edge of his sweatpants and dips them below his waist. His cock springs free, and he immediately begins pumping it with his fist, his tongue running across his lips.

Your dazed eyes drink in every inch of skin on his body. You beckon him closer, your hands splayed across his impressive chest. He hums teasingly, pecking your lips as he kneads your thighs with purpose.

"I get to take these out too." He hooks his finger under the seam of your lace panties and drags it down your legs. Jungkook bites the cloth between his teeth and scrunches his nose.

"So I'm your prize, huh? If you don't win this thing…" you ask.

"With dick like mine? How could I possibly lose?"

He's right. From the moment Jungkook fucks his dick into your cunt, you just about cum right then. He practically melts in you, his strokes passionate and beautifully desperate. They match his pleading eyes and his hands, pulling your hips back down on him.

He's using your body just right. He's a big boy, he can handle it. Jungkook's fingers reach to play with your pussy while he fills you.

"Fuck–! fuuuck,," you gasp, indulging in the smell of his skin as he splays your body on his. You're so full.

Jungkook's mouth gets to work on your tits, marking them diligently as he thrusts mindlessly into your drenched heat.

You tense suddenly, deepening your breaths as you sense your whole body warming.

He takes notice and encourages your orgasm. "Cum," He breathes "Cum hard,"

"All over my dick," he groans, finally. "Fuck, I can't resist you–"

You squeeze your eyes shut in concentration, mewing constantly. So, so, so close! It washes over you quickly, causing a blissful rush to ripple from your core to your heart and body.

He jolts, pounding himself back into you before stilling and cumming against your abused cervix.

You stay in each other's arms for a while. You caress Jungkook's face and remind him of how good he did, because he gets pouty.

The panties were an afterthought. They were thrown on the floor somewhere after all the action. Who cares about a stupid bet if he's got you?

permatag gang gang: @kooliv , @koobsessed , @angelwonie , @carolynanderson , @hoseokgrecns , @bangsterz , @swyseren , @sxtaep , @koostarcandy , @hgema , @jjkeverlast , @armys-dna , and @nglmrk

#jungkook smut #jungkook x reader smut #jungkook x reader #jungkook roommate au #roommate!jungkook #jungkook college au #bts college au #bts fic #jungkook college smut #jungkook x you #jungkook x y/n #jungkook #jungkook hot #jungkook ftl #jungkook friends to lovers #bts fanfic #bts au #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader fluff #bts college au smut

[goron-king-darunia]

Eggtober 21st, 2023

"Strange Flower" or "Controversy" Overcooked Hard-boiled Egg with Mayonnaise

(Clip Studio Paint, Gouache Brush, Airbrush for Paprika and Pepper. 12 colors, about 30 minutes.) Woke up with this idea. Mayo is a controversial condiment and I 100% understand. I hate custard filling in things like donuts. It's goopy, a little salty, and it has that texture to it that screams to your brain that "this is uncooked and probably bad to eat." And I think mayo is like that for lots of people, but worse. Because it's salty and a little sour and that same "uncooked" texture all sends the same signal but more like "this is rotten and falling apart. It's not good to eat." But I like mayo. Maybe I just got introduced to it in a more postitive way than custard or creme pat. Maybe because most creme pat comes to me in a donut at room temp and mayo usually comes from a refrigerated jar. Maybe it's because both are a little salty and eggy and so mayo reads as "a good sensible condiment for burgers and sandwiches and slaw salads" while creme pat reads as an "aberration that could only be put in a donut by accident." But then I think humans just kind of don't like seeing fatty substances all in one big glob. Same way lard is a common cooking ingredient in many non-USA countries but people in the "northern" non-farming USA see lard and only think "byproduct" like bacon grease and feel a visceral disgust the way I feel about burger grease. I think a lot of things are like that in life. Some of it's genetic, like the way cilantro tastes like soap to some and like a tasty floral herb to others. Some of it is experience, like a taste aversion to plums after a bad summer. And some of it is social. How we're taught to be disgusted by "byproducts" because that's not the thing we're intending to make, or it only happens when the thing you're making turns out "wrong." Some of it is political. I'm sure you all have ideas. And I think, on the one hand, disgust is useful. We get sick if we eat expired foods. We can die if we eat the wrong berry or mushroom. Being wary of the new is safe. An on the other hand, unbridled disgust is the enemy of curiosity and growth and discovery. When we turn away from things that make us uncomfortable, we lose a chance to learn.

So on the one hand I think this piece is about my experiences becoming a more adventurous eater in my adulthood. I still don't like creme patissiere. But I'm not going to waste a donut because of it anymore. I don't like red bean paste. But at least I know what it tastes like now, and it's not just a blind discomfort around something new. I'll never get over how the texture of glutinous rice cakes remind me of chewing gum, a thing I've been taught to spit out. But I can understand why people like mochi.

And I think on another hand (many hands today) this piece is also about how @quezify plays with disgust and horror and beauty. And how that curiosity disgusts some people and enamors others. How it ties you in knots. How wound dressing and debridement are all at once an act of love and an act of mutilation. How there's beauty there in something so instinctively disgusting.

Dunno exactly. That's what the art's there for, I guess. To express what I can't quite put in words. I hope it's disgusting, and I hope it's beautiful.

I wonder if @lady-quen's breadbugs will have fun with this one?

Speed paint~

I don't know if my style can really render any gravitas to it, with how soft everything is, but I hope it speaks to someone.

#Eggtober 21 2023 #Eggtober 2023 #my art #art by GKD #speedpaint #Hard Boiled Eggs #Mayonnaise #mayo