#I'm kinda afraid

[cyberspiderrrr]

I WROTE A POEM threw it under the cut

I hate forgetting. I know I want something but, If my subconscious was interested in letting me know what I want, Well that’d be a fucking shame, wouldn’t it? There’s thirst behind my teeth, my skin longs for your warmth Mildew-filled lungs power my body. Oh, don’t you know I’m burning like this all for you? You know me, can’t you guess? No, you’re forgetting just like me. We’re always just the same, It’s crazy. I guess it makes sense. Forgetting granted me my “me,” And you your “you.” And I learned that forgetting granted me myself from you. And yet the way we forget is so different. You’re empty, nothing’s there, And for the while nothing needs to be– Nifty, isn’t it? I’m empty, just like you nothing’s there, just like you And god, if there remains to be nothing, I think I might die. I watched someone who, If I were a touch more unfortunate, I’d see to be my father, Get his memories of my time rejected out of his body. My ribs are rotting. My body and mind are empty, And they long to be filled with you. They’ve wanted it for so long I’m not sure they’re satiable anymore.

#this is the first draft of this wreck be nice #poetry #poems #›› arachnid verse #original poem #this is my first published poem ever fun fact #i'm kinda afraid #also being plural is just so fun #i have more disturbing poetry about it if you guys want it #both more in quantity and quality

[flightdescending]

badly frankensteins the thing

#i forgot to put the underbelly back whoops #oh well #timelapse included to show that originally i didn't think it needed wings but it didn't read dragony enough #i think it's perfectly possible for a wingless FR dragon but the thing i made just there needed something #maybe big spikes or something #uhh what else #i gave it baragon ears because i hate how few fr dragons have EARS #PUT EARS ON THE BEAST #BIG OL EARS #the spike is not necessary i'm not afraid of the baldness it is also a baragon thing lol #i haven't even scried a single one of these guys but i do realize that they have a lot of terts that play with their baldness #but i think that's lame i dont think that they should look like naked paper dolls before you put a tert on them #oh also i wanted it to be kinda bipedal #too many quadrupeds in this menagerie

[djservo]

dykes to watch out for

#meant to post this last week but suffered from an extreme case of Rush To Pack The Morning Of Flight-itis . i'm afraid it's chronic #ts4 #ts4 edit #kinda wanna do a part 2 bc i know exactly what hairs i'd use for jasmine + samia hehe

[uncanny-tranny]

I love (sarcasm) that the two options for working when disabled are:

1. Work at the risk of (permanently) disabling yourself further. Go home to a paycheck that won't cover much, but at least you have money. Fight the urge to cry when you're home because you're in so much pain and you can't do basic things anymore

2. Don't work. You'll be in just as much pain, plus you will have even less money. Getting a disability check probably won't cover anything, but chin up! A single dollar is better than no dollar, right?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Nobody should be forced to make the decision to work or starve, but there's an added layer of torture when your body literally cannot handle these options. My heart goes out to us all, the world can change for the better

#disability #ableism #ableism tw #i'm still in pain after this shift i am feeling so fucking pissed #NEITHER of these are necessarily a 'privilege' and there are layers to this fucked-up cake #having money is better than having no money. but nobody should have to put their lives on the line because there is no. other. option. #i'm glad i can work but i'm so afraid of my body and my safety and my future. i'm scared that i'm only going to Get Worse because of work #every disabled person on government support should get $60004737 as their funds for the month #also point two is sarcastic are the end if that wasn't clear #kinda scared for my future ngl! 👍👍

[smultronviol]

Ppl going "waaahh unpopular opinion but Alice is kind of annoying and obnoxious and I don't think I'd like be her friend irl" is so funny to me bc like.

God forbid a cast of characters be multifaceted and have actual flaws and unpleasant aspects other than "grr angsty hero" and "whoops i'm so clumsy". Sometimes character dynamics and arcs need to be prioritized above "who would i personally be niceys with irl"

2. bro just WAIT until you hear about season 1 jon lol

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #season 1 jon was obnoxious and sometimes a straight up ASSHOLE and you were supposed to find him kinda grating!!! #yes alice IS a bit annoying and too much sometimes (esp in the first episodes) and i love that <3 #like. its p obvious that she uses the over the top-thing as a shield (to push ppl away/as a defense mechanism/to avoid being vulnerable) #we see her drop the act sometimes w ppl like teddy and sam who she actually feels comfortable around (and who know and understand her) #but like. she's stuck in a job she hates and is kind of afraid of (she KNOWS smth abt the horrors and is keeping her head down to survive) #(shes obviously afraid of sam going to far bc she KNOWS its dangerous) #so yes her act gets too much sometimes and yes sometimes she crosses the line into straight up mean (esp against gwen) #(but their dynamic is a whole other can of worms) #but like. i'm pretty sure its supposed to be seen that way. the audience isnt supposed to just find her kooky funny #the facade is supposed to be dismantled by the viewer etc etc #kind of like SEASON 1 JON the obnoxious bastard!!!!!!! #like. if you ever think alice is too mean towards gwen pls listen to s1 jon again and how he speaks abt martin?? #from a position as his boss no less? ngl i wanted to throttle him sometimes #you kinda forget abt it in the later seasons and if you only engage w fandom content. but like. go back and listen to the shit #he actually says. jesus christ man. i remember kinda hating him in the beginning #and to be clear i love jon! i think hes a great character! #and like. its almost as if his early season personality and facade was an important setup for his character development #and relationships with the other characters??? #but anyway 'alice is kind of annoying' is not an unpopular opinion its literally the FUCKING POINT #and both her and jon are my sweet baby angels <3 #alice dyer #jon sims #(and obviouslyyy you're still allowed to dislike a character ppl can have their own opinions etc etc etc. i just personally find it funny)

[rubiconas]

Wet beast hours ft. Iggy

#art #my art #digital art #doodle #Rain world #The Rivulet #Rivulet #He got the silly disease #I'm afraid it's terminal </3 /j #Absolutely ZERO thought behind those eyes #I might redraw this somtime bc this kinda sucks lmao

[azurityarts]

uhhh i don't really have a title for this lol

Just wanted to have another go at colouring and shading since I haven't done either in a while!

also while working on this I accidentally turned off the wrong layer and

ngl my guy don't look too bad

#pokemon #pkmn #art #umbreon #pokemon oc #oc tag #azure umbreon #umbreon really is just one of those pokemon that is kinda an oc template lmao #how to make umbreon oc? just change the ring colours on that bitch and boom #nah but there are a ton of ways to make a fun design #don't be afraid to experiment! #just also be wary that *overdesigned* is a very real thing and can kill the whole ensemble #not always! definitely not always; but it can #i'm not sure why i went on this rant oops

[lampochkaart]

Kokichi is asexual and you can't change my mind (and Kaito is an ace too 'cause i said so)

Here is why i think that way

Disclaimer! This post is not created to judge or shame anyone. I created it to explain why i think about them in that way and maybe try to make this headcanon to be more popular. I might sound kinda salty at times here but in general I don't mean to hurt anybody.

It kinda confuses me why so often Kokichi portrayed a little bit too intrested in making sexual comments and jokes. I probably shouldn't be surprised, because I know that we live in a sex obsessed world. I'm kinda used to it at this point. But I think people kinda exaggerate it.

In actual game he doesn't make sexual comments and jokes THAT often and 90% of the time they are directed at Miu who is the MAIN sourse of them in game. I even think that he would not say so many of those things if Miu wouldn't be starting it first.

He even get's confused for a second when Gonta tells him he couldn't catch Miu for Insect Meet and Greet because his "face got hot".

And in bonus mode Dangan Salmon Team he isn't particularly intrested in that either. In most cases when the player chooses sexual option even though the game states that it was a good option Kokichi will often just change the coversation to a different topic. Yeah, they had fun, but they didn't really talk that much about initial chosen option.

"Let's read a dirty book."

"How about joining my organization instead?" *starts rambling about his organization*

And yes, I REFUSE to call this protag Shuichi. This is NOT my favorite protagonist. He would not fucking say this.

Look how they massacred my boy *cries*

One thing Kokichi also does very often is being sarcastic. I really like this scene. But surprisingly I've seen people taking his excitement as genuine and was like ??? How? Have you gone so crazy after you've seen his first phrase that you blacked out and missed part when he went "nope :)". He literally was like "Is that what you wanted me to say? You wish😊🖕"

I also like how sometimes when the protagonist say something sexual Ouma redirects topic from himself. And he often suggests Tenko as alternative. For a long time I couldn't understand why it was her specifically. And then I realised. It's because Tenko will beat up any man who says something like that to her. He literally indirectly tells player to fuck off.

I can't belive how often those moments are overlooked.

I think that's all my main points regarding Kokichi. Everything else is not very convincing and can be dismissed. But I just want to point out that his color palette basically resembles asexual flag, because I think that's a neat detail.

Now Kaito. I'm gonna be honest. The main reason I headcanon him as ace is because I headcanon all my favorite characters as asexual. But there is a reason I fully accepted him as ace.

The scene in Talent Development Plan where he's discussing "man's passion" with Leon and Teruteru. While they were talking about girls it turned out Kaito this whole time was talking about chasing passion in more philosophical sense. And by exploring "unknown worlds" he probably meant space (they really should've seen that coming).

That's pretty much it. I just saw 1 (one) reason to make it canon for me and immediatly jumped on it.

I think that's it for both of them. They're not the only characters i headcanon to be on the ace spectrum (and i also have some on the aro spectrum too!) but they're the ones I think about the most, so I thought I'd explain it.

#my art #artists on tumblr #danganronpa #danganronpa v3 killing harmony #danganronpa v3 #drv3 #drv3 kokichi #drv3 kaito #kokichi ouma #kokichi oma #kaito momota #asexual characters #asexual #using this tag feels kinda scary #i'm afraid i'm crowding the tag with my silly little post about this silly little characters #edit: tumblr was being mean and messed up post but i fixed it #analysis by lampochka #can i call it that??

[front-facing-pokemon]

#blipbug #yeah i have no idea what's going on with this thing #tall little thing. elongated little head with its big ol' eyes #tempted to say “not really very interesting evolutionary line” but i'm afraid some orbeetle fans will obliterate me in the comments #so i won't. because. it kinda is a cool evolutionary line #just one that i personally had forgotten about

[skeletoninthemelonland]

#it's me i'm the wind blowing #y'all things are a little more complicated when it comes to these two #(sits down and takes a sip from my dark blue coffee mug) #(thinks: i wish i had springtrap coffee mug) #so... #both of them have difficult pasts #both are parents trying their best on raising their children #THE THING IS #one can't let herself get too attached #while the other is still afraid all humans are the same #but at the same time. they just want to find peace and happiness #and they've found it at home #they found happiness living those very brief and mundane moments #like waking up every morning #having breakfast next to people that make you smile #making your way to school/work and seeing sunlight pass through the trees #and going home after a tough day and there are rain clouds approaching. you just know you're going to sleep well at night #this is how they heal. and in the mean time. let themselves open up to each other #I have a feeling this is gonna be a slow burn kinda thing #COUGHING REALLY HARD #ENDING THIS RIGHT HERE OKAY BYE #starbstalks #springdad au

[thesherrinfordfacility]

the thing that is actually making me giddy with the possible angst is that i really think that we are about to see the most monumental shift in not only how we saw these characters but also how they previously saw each other.

the fact that we literally now have confirmation that a) they knew each other before the fall, b) aziraphale has had heart eyes since before time began, and c) crowley... possibly not so much, completely changes the context on not just the eden scene but also all the historic scenes that followed.

aziraphale knew crowley as an angel, and knew even then when crowley was meant to be 'perfect' that crowley was maybe a bit different, always asking questions and toeing the line. maybe out of a bit of bastardy himself, or out of begrudging awe of his ability but also his audacity, or just plain attraction, aziraphale immediate takes to him. but this has meant that aziraphale has placed crowley, perhaps unconsciously, upon a pedestal. and the pedestal that aziraphale puts crowley on from that moment may have wobbled throughout their history together, but it's stayed relatively intact.

this worries me, that aziraphale may not have quite let go of the fact that crowley just isn't that person any more, maybe never was to begin with, and continues in some measure to idolise him. my interpretation of this is that yes, crowley can be a bit of a dick (because, well, obviously) and aziraphale knows this, has done since the beginning, but aziraphale continues to hold crowley to an overall moral ideal that is so firmly ensconced in aziraphale's first perception of him as an angel that crowley will never be able to live up to it. not because he isn't a nice person, or because he can't live up to it, but maybe... he just simply doesn't want to.

but the issue is that throughout the ages (including the job minisode which ive had corrected for me, so Crowley Anger is now simply simmering), crowley's actions have only reinforced to aziraphale that despite being technically a demon, he has a huge heart and is not a horrible person. bit of a bastard, but not cruel. all of this just feeds and feeds into this image of crowley that aziraphale has built of him, and when crowley has his flashes of, in fact, not being honourable or kind, this threatens to upset the pedestal altogether.

these wobbly moments - when he thinks crowley is going to kill the children, when crowley snaps at him in rome, when crowley first proposes the arrangement, the prospect that he came up with the french revolt, the holy water request, the bandstand, "how can someone as clever as you be so stupid?"... moments where just for a second, in a small or huge measure, aziraphale's faith in crowley... flickers.

and of course aziraphale has been here before, right? he's had his faith, his devotion, his loyalty tested to the absolute limit of angelic endurance. so when his faith in heaven (never lost it in god) was obliterated, well - it had to cling to something. something that wouldnt mean that aziraphale has to lose the concept of faith altogether. so we're back to the old standby of idolatry, that aziraphale's heavenly faith is replaced by his faith in crowley, this angel that despite never originally giving aziraphale the time of day, aziraphale cannot see - for all of crowley's faults and bastardy and the frustration he poses - crowley as anything less than something to be worshipped.

this is exactly why i think that one of the main points of s2 is going to be a rift between them both. obviously i haven't talked about crowley's perspective of this and maybe i will in another post, but i do think that crowley is going to do something, a bad thing for the right reasons, but aziraphale isn't going to see it like that. that crowley will do something awful to protect aziraphale, but all aziraphale will be able to see is the betrayal or the cruelty or the despair, he can't see wood for the trees, and just lose that last vestige of faith he had altogether.

i feel like once all the disillusion and disenchantment has been swept away, and they're both laid bare at each other's feet... that they may not quite like what they find. from aziraphale's perspective, that whatever crowley does in s2 might be crossing aziraphale's line in the sand, and now aziraphale is starting to see crowley as someone that is truly grey, fluctuating between doing things that are Good, and things that are Good for Crowley.

and it's not as if aziraphale was blind to this before, but instead now... he kind of finally sees who crowley is? who he has been all along? the film has lifted from his eyes. realises that love and worship are not the same thing. what he loves, who he loves, doesn't equate to worshipping it/them, idolising them. there's a very big difference that echoes down to the very core tenet of who aziraphale is and his experiences with having and losing faith, but love having remained.

so stripped of the pedestal, crowley is now just simply... crowley. a person, not an angel, not a demon. and there is the distinct possibility that aziraphale might be completely blindsided by what he finds.

#good omens #good omens season 2 #ill let you in on a secret - no idea where i was going with this #but what im essentially saying is that aziraphale has this shiny picture of crowley in his head and heart #and when crowley continues to do crowley things aziraphale kinda steps back and is like #“huh... has it been this was all along?” #and if I'm wrong well honestly THANK GOD #but i feel like there is going to be a real reckoning at the end of s2 where faith and love is concerned #that the two are very different but aziraphale kinda confuses the two #anyway #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #good omens... speculation? Sure why not #not a shitpost but its good omens babyyyy #im saying theyre in somewhat of a toxic and disillusioned relationship and its likely going to (temporarily) end v badly im afraid #rhi needs to stop manifesting

[aro-aceattorney]

GOD sorry i can't get over sad normal. normal who pulled away from the group. normal who married hermie two at 19 and got divorced 2 years later. normal who never stopped feeling weird, no matter how proud his dad is of him. normal who calls hero every week and talks to her for hours. normal who doesn't know his best friends' son. normal who hasn't seen teen high since he graduated.

#dndads #dndads spoilers #sorry i'm obsessed with him #i need the teen talk RIGHT NOW i gotta know what will thinks his life looks like now #i for one think he dropped out of college and works in like . construction or some shit #he has a bunch of queer friends who are cooler than him and he feels like he kinda orbits around their friend group #hes not close to anybody like he was the other teens but he's afraid its been too long for them to be that close again #hes my little guy i love making him miserable #(after the reunion they get close again don't worry)

[techmomma]

I am increasingly certain after 34 years of life that if you are afraid of something, if you want to get better, then you have to face it. Maybe you face it in little pieces. Maybe you face it with help or holding someone's hand, preferably in a safe environment but not everyone has that luxury. But exposure and being around what scares you is the only way to make it better.

Afraid of the ocean? Go touch the ocean.

Afraid of crowds? Go be around crowds for a time.

Afraid of being alone? Gonna have to be alone for a time.

Afraid of death? Talk about death, maybe go to a cemetary.

Afraid of becoming your parents? Gonna have to face the idea that you ARE probably like them to an extent, in order to NOT be like them.

Afraid of people not liking you? Gonna have to be not liked, sometimes.

Afraid of those thoughts saying you're a bad person. Gonna have to go talk to those thoughts.

Because humans are funny, paradoxical creatures, and almost always, the answer to being afraid of something is embracing it.

The more we embrace the thing we're scared of, the less control it has over us.

But, sometimes, people are also afraid of getting better. The decision to embrace our fears is not one that everyone takes.

Because sometimes, the fear of what is involved in getting better is greater than the original fear itself. It turns into a self-eating ouroboros.

Brought to you by me remembering me avoiding doing scary things and that made them worse and the only thing that makes them better is doing the scary things, even when scared.

#also brought to you by every time I've done something that seemed kinda insane or terrifying and people were like WHY STEPH #'I did it because I was scared of it.' #'what' #'to teach my brain that my imagination is always scarier than the reality' #I don't do scary shit because I'm not scared #I do it because I AM scared #I don't go talking to strangers because I love talking to strangers #I do it because I'm afraid of strangers. but I don't want to be. #I am so scared all of the time man #no matter how goofy or silly I look to other people or how quickly I volunteer for shit #that is more than 15 years of trying to face face my fears #15 years of fucking practice #and if never ends

[xulips]

I need more info in the freakvamp au. like. does akito have organs? if not, does that include a brain?if n brain, how think? if have, why? if no blood, there's no way to get water around his body? no blood vessels? so uselessly existent organs??????? HELP

HAHSGS SORRY OP I THOUGHT IT FITS HIS CURIOSITY

but to answer ur question, kinda! he only have those that's beneficial to his daily activity, like his digestive and respiratory system. for example he doesn't have a heart to pump blood because he has no blood to begin with.

the way it works is that akito only digest meat (carnivore moment) and the nutrients from said meat (extracted thanks to the help of his special digestive system) helps his internal organs work just like normal, even better if the meat is fresh + has blood on them. more nutrients means an even stronger body

and for the brains and other parts of the organs, it's really just.. pure meat slob no bones whatsoever (this might make people believe he's weak in general because of no skeletal structure underneath him but his muscle power are way beyond comprehension to balance it out) (he's still an anomaly afterall, he can't be easy to kill)

i didn't actually plan for this au to become a real big thing in this account so i haven't done much research BUT! here's what i think about it so far :3c

#do i even want to talk about his excretory system. #sigh. no. he doesn't shit. i'm not explaining that. #talking abt him makes me forgot that he's a monster that u should be afraid of because he's super hard to kill #and not just. a meat slob #but he kinda is one anyway lol #and also addition to the nutrients from the meat he eats #it also dilutes (?) his 'rotten meat' smell for a couple of while. so it's like eating and taking a bath at the same time #he takes personal baths too don't get me wrong but it's helps the smell a lil if it's from within instead of only his skin #ask #freakvamp au #req #<— just to tag the art

[caruskie]

I drew them with watercolors as I promised heheee

Imagine if Ales became evil and started kidnapping other teensies cuz he got rejected by someone lol (but I heard he got mad at Polokus for some reason that I don't remember)

And a lil bit of doodles

What should I draw next?

#rayman legends #rayman origins #rayman #teensie #reyman barbara #doodles #sketch #watercolor #i wanna do an art trade but I'm afraid of it for some reason #i had an art block and now it's kinda hard to draw again #but it's still pleasure and fun for me haha

[sluttylittleslashers]

Plz turn down your volume before watching

#that scene was hot tho #I'm not afraid to say it #I’d give him the fattest smooch #The fucking scream is so funny #it's kinda hot tho....even tho he's blowing glue on her lips..still hot #Plz turn down tour volume whatever bo said in this scene is not wroth unless you want to be scream at #slasher fandom #slasher fucker #slashers #tiktok #i love tiktok #bo sinclair x reader #bo sinclair #house of wax 2005 #house of wax