#When we raid Area 51 who’s bringing the snacks? I can bring the drinks

[animatedtext]

#When we raid Area 51 who’s bringing the snacks? I can bring the drinks #gif #animatedtext #wordart #transparent

[musicnoots]

The Raid - Storming Area 51 (2/3)

Band of Brothers

A/N: Listen here, I wrote this over the course of three days in which I consumed an ungodly amount of caffeine so the writing here was pretty decent and then spiraled out of control.

Synopsis: The car ride and the raid on Area 51 doesn’t go as planned, but the men do whatever it takes to see those aliens. 

Part 1 Part 3

Tags: @gottapenny @dustyjjumpwings @higgles123 @wexhappyxfew @medievalfangirl @bandofmarvels @croatianbagudna @curraheev

“I said I didn’t want to go.”

“Well, Dick—life sucks, and then we die.” Lew kicked up his feet on the backseat of the driver’s seat of Lip’s minivan, stretching his arms and yawning as the Nevada landscape flew past them. 

Dick was pretty sure he made it clear that he didn’t want to accompany the men on their voyage to the alien prison. He clocked out early last night, making sure everyone left his residence before midnight. He even double locked his front door and the door of his bedroom, but everyone knows that with Ron Speirs, the man can get everything and anything he wants. 

It took less than fifteen minutes for the men to break into Dick’s house, pick the lock of his bedroom door and carefully shove him into the backseat of Lip’s minivan. Not to mention that they stopped by to take Liebgott, Webster, Guarnere, and Toye because in the words of Ronald Speirs—the more the merrier.

Now, they were awfully close to the site of Area 51, and everyone was ecstatic to go and see the aliens. They were like little children on a field trip—fighting over the snacks and singing car ride songs over and over again while Dick sat with his arms crossed looking like the kid whose mom forced him to go.

“Looks like we’re almost there!” Lip exclaimed, pointing at a billboard with grey aliens on it reading Area 51 — Alien Center. “Okay, so make sure you have everything you need before you go. Lew, I have your camera here, so you can take pictures with the aliens and—Ron! Stop eating all of the string cheese!” He leaned over to the passenger seat and wrestled the pack of string cheese out of Ron’s hands, throwing them back into the center console.

“But I’m hungry!” Ron whined.

“Well, I told you to eat a full and hearty breakfast at Dick’s place, and plus, we have guests, so leave some for them.”

“My place?” Dick popped into the question, just now knowing that these men weren’t in his house just to kidnap him but to also eat his food. “You men ate my food?”

“Relax, Dick. We only made six peanut butter sandwiches, and Web ate all of your veggie straws,” Lewis said before out stretching his arm out and around Dick’s shoulders.

God, they kidnapped him and ate his food? And Webster ate his goddamn veggie straws? That was his favorite snack!

He slumped back onto the seat in both anger and annoyance. Not only was he pissed at the fact that his friends took his food and his veggie straws, but they kidnapped him when he said numerous times that he was absolutely, positively not tagging along.

“Oh, cheer up, Dick. Look at the bright side: you’re gonna see some aliens.” Lew drank his bottle of water, definitely not his preferred drink, but Lip said he can’t bring his Vat 69 into his van.

“Aliens?” Web spoke up from the back. “That’s where you’re taking us? I thought we were going to the beach! I even brought my camera to get some pictures of the ocean!”

“Pfft. C’mon Web, get with the program and forget your stupid shark creatures. Aliens are the superior species here,” Liebgott said, and the Harvard graduate merely rolled his eyes and held onto his camera through the bumpy car ride on the verge of tears because he’s trying to convince himself that it’s okay to take pictures of aliens instead of sharks.

Meanwhile, Bill was busy tugging on the back of Joe Toye’s hair just to mess with him and because he was bored. Bill forgot to bring his Mad Libs book where he put dick in the place of every noun.

“Guarno,” Joe warned, but the tugging persisted. Then he snapped and turned around, swatting the square jawed man’s hands away. “Bill, stop! That hurts!”

“What? I’m bored! And you gotta weird hairline, too.”

“Fuck off!”

It was like a school bus there. Dick buried his head into his hands, trying to block out the sound of Joe and Bill fighting and bickering like twelve year olds and the soft whimpers of Webster who really wanted to go to the beach for shark watching while Lew was taking up all the leg space. Dick should have never sat in the middle. He’s hit his head on the roof of the car seven times since they hit Nevada.

“Boys, looks like we’re here!” Lip announced, and almost everyone crowded the mirrors to get a peak of the secret alien storage area. 

It was nothing but desert and dust, but not too far away, there was a gate with a big stop sign on it and multiple warning signs. To Dick, it looked like a recipe for life in prison, but to Ron, it looked like a Disney store. He was about to get everything he wanted, shove it into a backpack, and go home with it. Hell, he’d even take a guard home.

As soon as Lip put the car in park, everyone was filing out of the car with their bags, complaining of the hot Nevada sun and the dust of the ground beneath them. Bill cursed especially loud because he dropped his bucket hat, saying something along the lines of Jesus fuck! Look at this Joe! Fuckin’ dust on my hat. I swear I’ll shoot it. 

“Alright, boys!” Lip said out loud as he was getting out of the car, hands on his hips. “Make sure to get your snacks! I want all of you to get at least one fruit or else no Area 51.”

All of the men groaned at his announcement. “Aw Lip! Really?” Lew pouted. He’s not much of a fruit guy.

“Yes, Lewis. Here, everyone get an apple,” he said, passing out red apples from his snack box before bringing out the second snack box. “Get your snacks, boys!”

Everyone ran towards Lip, raiding the snack box of its string cheese, trail mix, beef jerky, granola bars, salted nuts, and dried fruit. Web and Lieb got into a brief argument when they both touched the last pack of trail mix—the one with extra M&Ms. 

“Boys, stop fighting over the last pack of trail mix! M&Ms are not for men,” Buck said, separating the two and grabbing the packet for himself, “they’re for Buck Compton.”

“Lip! You didn’t pack my mini cinnamon rolls!” Ron whined, tapping his feet on the ground like a toddler throwing a mini tantrum.

Lip shot him a warning look. “Ron, cinnamon rolls are heavy. Wouldn’t want you slowing down on your quest for the aliens.”

“Fine. As long as we get ice cream on the ride back.”

“Of course we will, and that reminds me—boys! Change of plans! I’ll be driving you guys home, so I’ll be waiting here until you’re done!” Lip announced, watching the boys stray further past the gate with the big stop sign. “Okay, stay safe! Ron, I want you to text me every fifteen minutes, okay?”

“Yes, I know! You’ve told me eighty-seven times already!”

“And Lew! Take pictures with the aliens, please! Bill, get a souvenir for Babe! Nothing too scary, though! Stay safe!” he yelled one last time before turning to sit in the car, turning the air conditioning up full blast to beat the hot Nevada sun beating down on him. 

He started to eat Ron’s leftover fruit snacks before he saw Dick still standing at the side of the car with his arms crossed, looking defeated and beat down. Rolling down his window, Lip spoke, “Dick? I thought you’re looking for them aliens with the boys?”

Dick simply shook his head, still staring straight at the ground, and Lip invited him into the car to escape the heat. 

It’s not the fact that they’re literally breaking into top-secret private government property that bothers him, they can do whatever they want. It’s them breaking into his home, kidnapping him, and taking him to the middle of nowhere that makes him so annoyed. He thought was so clear with his distaste in accompanying them on a death wish, but he really should have planned more accordingly. I mean, we’re talking about Ronald Speirs and Lewis Nixon—two men of spontaneous tastes and interests who will do anything to get whatever they want. Even worse, Dick’s probably going to forgive them for this entire ordeal because he just can’t keep a grudge against them for longer than ten minutes.

“They took me even though I said I didn’t want to go,” he sighed, crossing his arms across his chest. “I told them at least seven times last night that I didn’t want to go on their alien adventure. I locked all of my doors, and they still managed to break in.”

“Well, you’re also dealing with Ron Speirs, and the man knows how to pick a lock when he needs to. What he wants, he gets,” Lip said, cracking open a pack of crackers and cheese and then offering it to Dick. “Want some?”

 At first, he didn’t reply. Dick was too angry to even pick up his head and look at Lip, let alone grab the pack of crackers and cheese. 

“He ate my veggie straws, too.”

“Who?”

“Web. Those were my favorite.”

“Ah, that’s alright, Dick. We’re getting ice cream after this anyways,” Lip smiled, and Dick felt okay for once. Sure, his friends were going to get into a load of trouble breaking into top secret government property, but they were probably going to get away with it anyways. Well, Ron will. He’s not so sure about Nix but deep down, Dick does worry about his wellbeing during the raid.

Meanwhile, the boys were busy getting into Area 51 and running around trying to find the aliens after successfully distracting the guard by shoving Web into one of the guards because Web won’t do anything. Why did we bring him? He’s useless. The distraction allowed the boys to make a run for it into three totally different directions even though Harry literally screamed for them to follow him. 

“Man, did we really have to ditch Web like that?” Lieb asked. He was the only person upset after seeing Ron shove Web into the guards. It was like watching a horror movie. “Like, I know he’s useless, but we really have to leave him? Couldn’t we have just waited for him?”

“Son, your friend thought we were going to the beach,” Buck said, taking lead of the group that was him, Lieb, and Harry. They took a left when the group splintered off into different directions and ended up in pitch black room with Buck holding a flashlight to light the way.

“He’s gullible!”

“So what are we lookin’ for anyways?” Harry asked and yawned from looking at the shelves of metal parts probably used to make the spaceships. He reached over and took five metal parts even though he had no idea what they were used for. He plans to give them to Kitty once they get home and display it on the bookshelf. “We buildin’ a spaceship of something?” 

“The aliens,” Buck said, “but looks like we went the wrong way.”

“This sucks!” Liebgott huffed, hunched over and crossed his arms, looking like a skinny hunchback of Notre Dame as he followed Buck and Harry through the dark hallway. He tried to make it look like he was still pissed for having left Web to elements of the security guards, but in reality, he was really scared of the parts and pieces displayed on the shelves. I mean, why does the US government even have this many probes? Just looking at them made the cab driver shiver. “Wish we had Web’s camera, then we coulda taken pictures of this shit, but nooooo! We gave him away to the fuckin’ guards! Like, who does that? We’re a team!”

Buck rolled his eyes and sighed. This was like babysitting an eight year old. “Shut up, Joe, or I’ll nail it to your head.”

“You said the same thing to Malarkey!”

“‘Cause it made him close his damn mouth. Now shut up.”

Putting Harry, Buck, and Liebgott maybe wasn’t the best decision, but it was one of the directions the men took after running past the guards during a quick adrenaline rush. While they were busy looking in and taking things from the shelves, the group that consisted of Lew, Joe Toye, and Bill went ran into the direction of the aliens, but it wasn’t quite what they were expecting. 

“Boo!”

Bill flinched back, his hands almost reaching over and strangling Joe after he jumped out at him out of the blue in an attempt to scare him. “I swear, Joe. I swear I’ll shoot you if you do that again. Fuckin’ bastard.”

“Hey, guys! No fighting!” Lewis said in a hushed voice, trying so hard not to yell and give away their position.

“You’re the one who’s drunk at least twice everyday.”

“It’s actually three times a day, and I’m very content with that statistic, thank you very much.”

Joe rolled his eyes. What did Lewis know? He might even be drunk right now! “So, these are the fancy little aliens that we’ve been raving about for the past seventy million hours in that damn car,” he said, touching the jars on the shelves until Lewis swatted his hands away. 

“Don’t touch that! Do you know what’s in those?”

Joe blinked. “No.”

Lewis opened his mouth to speak, but Bill spoke for him instead, pushing him to the side with his hips and taking ahold on Joe’s shoulders.

“Alien juice! Goddamn fuckin’ alien juice!” Bill whispered, almost on the verge of yelling. “You drink that and you’ll become an alien, and if you become an alien, we’re leavin’ you. You belong here now.”

They had taken the path that was way more interesting than just shelves of metals but also way more creepier than anticipated. It was shelves upon shelves of jars filled with alien specimen in some sort of juice that had Bill muttering alien juice, alien juice, alien juice over and over again. It was beyond creepy—more creepy than those unsolved mysteries Bill likes to watch at two in the morning in an empty house. 

It was the fact that these aliens were just looking at you, as if they were waiting for the right moment to pounce on you and eat your guts. That was what made all three men shine their flashlights in a 360 degree angle every two minutes, making sure that it didn’t suddenly become like the movie Cloverfield.

Lew was especially scared, and he wasn’t even drunk. Actually, if he was drunk, then he probably would have tried to open the jars of alien specimen and shove the contents into his pockets. “I miss Dick.”

“Yeah, yeah, you miss your boyfriend, but can you please tell us what we’re lookin’ for?” Bill groaned, and Lewis turned around faster than Sobel revoking weekend passes.

“He is not my boyfriend! He can never have my body!”

“You’ve literally said that you miss him eight times already.”

“You will never understand the connection between us, Bill,” Lew huffed before shoving his camera into the hands of Joe and standing next to the biggest jar of alien specimen. “Here, take a picture of me with the alien. I wanna show Dick what he missed out on so I can make him jealous.”

He put on his best smile and a peace sign—something that became part of his natural reflexes without any good reason. Dick was going to be so jealous, he would probably be all over Nix and his Area 51 souvenirs like a fangirl meeting their favorite boy band. That’s probably not going to happen, but Lewis has dreams. He has dreams.

Joe snapped a picture of Lewis and the alien, and then handed the camera back. “So, you aren’t dating Dick?”

“Pfft. Of course not. He is too good for me. Shit, that reminds me—I need to get a souvenir.” He shoved the camera back into his backpack. “You two, help me find the perfect alien souvenir. The best one for Dick, of course.”

Whatever an alien souvenir is, Bill and Joe had no idea and they were one hundred percent sure that Nix had the biggest crush on Dick and was really, really bad at pretending that he didn’t. It was him taking pictures of him and the alien specimen claiming that he was going to print it out and frame it in his home, but everyone knew he just wanted to make Dick jealous. He's really not that good at handling his own feelings, and even the aliens could tell.

As they scoured all over the dark and eerie room for things they can bring home, Ronald Speirs was having the best luck out of the eight men that entered the restricted area.

He had run on his own path which caused the initial split within the group. He had run over so many of his friends that by the time they got back on their feet, he was gone. Lewis was the one he actually ran over, knocking him down with the force of his body running faster than the speed of light, faster than the bullets ringing out from the guns of the guards trying to stop him from entering the jackpot. 

It was a huge, dimly lit room filled with full sized aliens.

Whether or not these aliens were alive and actually saw Ron looking at them with eyes the size of pinheads is unknown, but Ron was definitely going to take one of these home. How was he going remove and take them? Well, that was up to him.

Ronald Speirs was so full of surprises, you can never tell what the man was going to do. Once, he wanted sweet tea from the supermarket but it was closed, so he went to Alabama and made his own tea from organic ingredients. How he managed to find the ingredients and a kitchen at two in the morning will remain a mystery. Even more, how he managed to do all of that and come home with a pitcher of sweet tea by dawn is something never to be discussed. He just does as he pleases. There are no rules.

His eyes scanned each of the aliens, deciding on which one he wanted to take.

He wants the perfect alien. Nice and lean with a gorgeous turquoise color. Big eyes, too. He doesn’t want to worry about getting them glasses because they can’t see shit. They also have to be experienced in combat, specifically running in the middle of a battle and making it out alive. It has to be a super alien.

It’s been approximately forty minutes since Ron reached the vault, and he was still making up his mind.

So many aliens, yet just one Ron. He can only carry on, but if he could, he would free all of them and make his house into an alien sanctuary. Not even PETA can stop him.

It was until he heard the yells and screams of the other guys outside of the vault that he made up his mind, a shit-eating smirk dancing on his lips as he broke the glass of the incubator with his knife.

“Get your hands off my friend you filthy animals! Web! C’mon, we’re goin’ to the beach!”

“Lieb, please get off of him.”

“Guarno, I swear I will strangle you if you tie my shoelaces together again.”

“Eat shit, Joe. I have your souvenir, so think about that next time you threaten me.”

The pterodactyl screeches coming just feet outside the vault didn’t stir Ron even one bit. His eyes and hands were concentrated on taking the green alien out and onto the floor, waiting for it to invoke a reaction.

Please. Please be alive.

“Ron! Where are you buddy?” The voice of Lewis echoed throughout the facility, but Ron’s eyes were fixated on the extraterrestrial in front of him that was slowly but surely moving its fingers. “We’re leaving soon!”

Leaving soon? Ron Speirs leaves whenever he wants to.

Once he saw the alien blink and wave, Ron swore he could cry. He smiled and wiped a nonexistent tears from his cheeks. “Let’s go home, alien.���

#band of brothers fic #band of brothers imagines #band of brothers imagine #band of brothers fanfiction #band of brothers fanfic #band of brothers #easy company #hbo war #joe liebgott #richard winters #dick winters #david webster #lewis nixon #joe toye #bill guarnere #buck compton #ron speirs #ronald speirs