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#and they'll never say im gay like it's some kind of sickness
khaleesiofalicante · 2 years
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CHAPTER 18 LET'S GO IT'S 2 47 AM
DID RAZIEL JUST SAY SHOOKETH???
And that was the other reason she kept staring. Because he kept talking like that. Like he was a frat boy on spring break.
right? Is he good there?
“I don’t look like him,” Raziel huffed. “Your big bro looks like me.”
People had always said David had the face of an angel. Lexi wondered if they had any clue how right they were.
oh my god 😭 😭
“I’m kinda sick,” Raziel said awkwardly. “So, I had to improvise.”
“So, you decided to look like a blonde, white boy?” Lexi asked. “Typical.”
“Well, I could have looked like a blonde, white girl,” Raziel suggested. “But I thought you’d find that a little distracting.”
LMAO RAZIEL OH MY GOD
“I didn’t have a choice,” Raziel mumbled. “You think I want to live inside a teenage girl?”
OH MY GOD HIM
“A little feral?” Lexi asked in an incredulous tone. “My girlfriend could have died!”
“Uh,” Raziel said. “I thought y’all broke up?”
“Raziel, you are on thin fucking ice right now.”
RAZIEL BRO NO
“No one kidnapped me,” Raziel huffed. “I’m not a baby. I’m an angel.”
“Uh, didn’t Ithuriel get kidnapped?” Lexi asked. “Like twice?”
“Ithruiel is a baby,” Raziel rolled his eyes.
WHY IS HE ACTING LIKE A 12 YEAR OLF
stop mumbling bitch
“Um,” the angel swallowed. “I kinda messed up.”
this is making me really fucking angry
so many are dead because you "kinda messed up"
“Lexi, I would never curse Alec Lightwood,” Raziel said in an offended tone. “He is my boy.”
well ok then
“I gave up on Idris,” Raziel repeated, slower this time.
good to know
Raziel what the actual fuck
you were supposed to be a powerful angel. you were supposed to PROTECT.
I don't fucking care you got mad at immature kids
..oh my god im gonna kill him
Raziel your little mistake fucked up so much
You threw a fucking tantrum and abandoned your land
stop talking like that.
he gave his powers to...Selena?
I think idk
oh yeah he did
YOU WERE FUCKING HOPING??
SO MANY ARE DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU
FUCK YOU
STOP ACTING LIKE YOUR ACTIONS DON'T HAVE CONSEQUENCES.
IM ACTUALLY SO FRUSTRATED AND ANGRY I'M GONNA PUNCH HIM
you did what you had to do then. now we are gonna try to fix that ok Mr powerful angel?
noice. Raziel supports the gays
homophobia is canceled
PLEASE I WANT HIM TO TELL ALL THIS TO ALL THE SHADOWHUNTERS
No, but genuinely what did he think would happen? like he went "alright imma give up on Idris, pull the wards down, let demons attack" and then was surprised when THE STEALER OF REALMS stole Idris. Idris isn't a realm though...
ayyy Gabriel's 🌈
“Not true,” Raziel chuckled. “I’m kinda ticklish behind my left ear.”
I don't know whether to punch him or laugh
you think I care about your pride right now??
🖕
he's right...I can't say I am saying this but you need to go after Selena first
“Lexi Herondale,” she announced. “Full-time Airbnb for angelic beings and part-time courier service.”
JBDHUIDUDFVYUGDFV PLEASE-
oh oh oh it was Belial who sent her the angel rune
well fuck
in the poison...?
ask Selena to wake up...
so emotional
im sleepy gotta go make some tea
I plan to stay up reading lbaf tonight
I slightly overestimated the quantity of the milk and now I have 1 and a quarter cups of tea
anyway
“It’s alright. You can sleep for now. Get some rest, my love.”
this hit me like a fucking train
we get malec but at what cost?
no Magnus no fuck no
NO ABSOLUTELY NOT SIT THE FUCK DOWN
Lexi had died and come back. Selena had been revealed to be the assassin and was apparently possessed by a powerful prince of hell. Max had visited Edom like it was no big deal. David was being held hostage by Asmodeus who wanted God knows what.
And of course, there was a chance to bring Rafael back.
well that's been a rollercoaster
still not an excuse to forget what you did but ok
Wait. what if you bring him back then what? the others didn't want him to have a fucking funeral you think they'll let him be consul?? well technically he did not break the law because of a loophole but still.
“What kind of situation?” Alec asked.
He was pretty sure nothing would surprise him at this point.
“The kind involving Raziel,” Simon replied. “He has sent us a message.”
Okay. So, apparently, he was wrong.
I CHOKED
He's so done. someone give him a break
“Lexi, you once told us Raziel asked us to buy you air pods,” Clary pointed out.
“And that he wanted you to skip history classes at the Academy,” Simon narrowed his eyes.
PLEASE-
but did you buy her air pods though 👀
and did she skip the class 👀
the Lexi urge to use the history class excuse every time during history class
wait
oh my god those who left the clave in exile for the cohort
the cohort demanded weapons
they are shitty people but oh my god they must've been so scared
the cohort and the ones who left
they must have been so scared. the ones who left must have been expecting a welcome, not this.
are they even alive?
By the time she was done, Alec had a splitting headache.
He seriously needs a vacation
there is so much going on and im so here for it
I love the pace
but all of them need therapy and a vacation
CRAP MY TEA'S COLD
“Just so I am clear,” Simon cleared his throat to break the silence. “All of this happened…technically…because of Raziel?”
yes.
there is nothing more sensitive than a man's ego
petty little fucker
he didn't care when valentine tried to kill the downworlders or when Sebastian turned HIS shadowhunters into endarkened
but how dare someone offends him
fucker
the rune fuck
but runes can be rendered useless if you cut them
like the skin
“Uh,” Simon replied. “I kinda summoned Archangel Michael and bribed him to give it to me.”
a typical Tuesday
“But we could try,” Simon suggested. “Maybe the angels have grown softer with time.”
“One of them forcibly gave his powers to a child and made her vulnerable to demonic possession,” Clary pointed out.
“Okay so they haven’t changed at all,” Simon sighed.
exactly
GIGI YOU GO GIRL YOU'RE SO SMART ILY
“If anyone wants to go to Idris to kick his ass and save Selena,” Jace said dangerously. “You better get in line.”
LET'S GOOO
it's them...it's the gang
im so...
time to cry
I wanna cut my hair again
PLEASE IT'S ALREADY SO SHORT IT BARELY REACHES MY SHOULDERS
but it's not even and I need to go to get it set
cant wait to see the hairdresser's face
OK ANYWAY
love how they're like "If Julian goes everyone else goes"
Julian narrowed his eyes. “And if you don’t come back?”
They all groaned at that.
why? it makes perfect sense to ask that
damn it people be realistic. I hate how every time someone's like "What if it goes like this instead" you're told not to think like that?? we need to be realistic in some situations. we need to prepare for everything
PLEASE LEXI AND JACE-
I swear I love them
cant wait for the "where's my kiss Santiago" from Anjali
IT'S COMING I CAN FEEL IT
“Jace, if you break Cortana, Belial is the last thing you need to worry about,” Emma said before kissing his cheek. “Be safe.”
true. you'll choke on your own blood and she will make it look like an accident
“Don’t even try,” Magnus said and kissed him on the lips. “I go where you go, Alexander.”
“We are not parabatai,” Alec pointed out with a grin.
“I don’t need an oath to make stupid decisions,” Magnus pointed out. “I’m completely capable of doing that on my own.”
TEARS
LITERAL TEARS
“Hey,” Jace clapped his hands. “We are trying to fight a prince of hell here!”
“What else is new?” Magnus mumbled and walked up to the table.
TRUE
malec and Anjali content makes me cry every time
“We don’t have the numbers. If we split into two teams, we will make the Clave vulnerable to a surprise attack. It makes sense for a small team to go. I assume you are going with your family. It makes sense too. You are the only ones who have fought a prince of hell before. I hope one of you is carrying Cortana with you. But yeah. This is the best strategy. At least the only one with that won’t result in needless casualties. So, there is no need to explain. I understand.”
whispers holy shit smart women
I see you, Alec told his son quietly. I see what you see in her.
oh my god DO NOT DO THIS RIGHT NOW
what's the object?
it's the consul seal...
“I promise,” Alec kissed the top of her head. “Keep an eye on my Clave, will you? I’ll be right back.”
I WILL FUCKING CRY
LOOK AT THEM BONDING
HE TRUSTS HER
IM GONNA-
GIGI AND ROMAN
since im pretty sure Gigi is aro, them as queerplatonic besties
so they are all different...
yes we been knew
but this means something doesn't it
“I’m not a boy,” Roman said in a squeaky voice. “I’m a girl. My name is, uh, Roman…ia.”
TJBUHIDSHJDFVUIHDFV ROMAN
“No boys,” the sister wagged a finger.
“But I was raised by the gays!” Roman pointed out. “Are you sure that doesn’t help with my case?”
I love him so much
Jesse...he was tied to Jesse
LOVE ALL THE MENTIONS
a part of an angel
that's what the need
the princes would have jumped at the opportunity of killing each other
why haven't they done it if this exists??
oh
OH
three strikes...
good luck
DAVID MY LOVE
no one knows the future but our decisions directly impact it. max you can't make a decision like that without thinking.
My mother coming to tell me to go to sleep:
me: MAMA YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED BELIAL POSSESSED SELENA-
anyway
max listen up you little shit. You cannot be hasty about something like this, whether you choose to do it or not.
and you need to tell Magnus and alec
Asmodeus if you're bored go watch Netflix or smth smh
or maybe read a book
bitch
Asmodeus is frustrated not everyone is a manipulative shit like him and that good people exist
“No,” David replied truthfully. “I want him to choose himself.”
I just...I love him so much
“You would never understand what it means to love someone with all your heart.”
“Love?” Asmodeus laughed. “Whatever am I going to do with love?”
“Everything,” David replied. “You can do anything and everything with love.”
Asmodeus shook his head. “Love belongs among fools, David Beauchamp.”
“Well,” David said. “Then I am dumb as fuck.”
THE TITLE
ALSO, DAVID YES YOU'RE SO RIGHT
BUT THE TITLE
“All creatures are flawed, you know,” Asmodeus said. “We are filled with desire and greed and anger and pride and-”
“Yes, I am well aware of the seven sins,” David interrupted.
“I am the demon that feeds on pain. I feed on your sins,” Asmodeus announced as if it was something to be proud about. “And humans, whoever they are, have pain inside them. They are all sinners.”
“Of course,” David said. “It’s what makes us human.”
“Not you, though,” Asmodeus frowned. “Even Magnus…He has so much pain and chaos inside him to offer. But you? There is nothing inside you. No pain. No chaos. No darkness.”
it's so hard to be kind when you could choose to be cruel instead.
Asmodeus fuck you
Asmodeus glowered. “You have had the most difficult of lives. Yet, you stand here like a beacon of light. It’s not how things should be. Your pain should be there. You must use it like everyone else. You are abnormal, child.”
“I’m not abnormal,” David said in a ridiculous tone. “I go to therapy. Maybe you should try that sometime.”
genuinely, David how do you do it? how do you manage to be so kind all the time?
even in a literal hell
OH CRAP IT'S 4 31 AM
THAT'S WHAT THE BOOK IS ABOUT??
damn
I’m afraid his parents never let me babysit
for very valid reasons
Coraline...?
(poker face just started playing while I am editing this and my first thought was lbaf. I really just associate that song with these chaotic gays and the token straight)
like the book about a girl who finds a door into a creepy alternate universe?
or is that caroline?
OH
wait a fucking second
how old is Albert in this scenario?
wait
I think it was mentioned Albert was pretty young when David came to live with them?
this is from the TDA era, right?
oh
oh it's his mother
fucker named his child after someone who was valentine's friend
oh my god im gonna cry
she...she was an amazing person
she's alive...
maybe he loved David. but his ways were wrong. his approach was wrong. you don't intentionally hurt those you love
“There was only one monster in that story,” David said. “And it wasn’t her.”
exactly.
he is so much like her...
oh of course
David and Rafael remember who did this to them
rafe...he must be so scared right now
the nothingness
“I wouldn’t believe a word out of someone who starts their sentences with Valentine was right,” David spat at the demon's feet.
YES MY BOY
DON'T YOU DARE HURT CHOPIN
David standing up to Asmodeus im so-
max is it ok to thirst?
oh my god
steles and runes
shit
wait what does that mean?
control Idris?
it is so...AHJBDUCHUIDFU to know what they are doing is dumb and not be able to do anything about it
it's 5 08 gonna read the other two chps after school today. byee
Okay I love you for calling out Raziel because it was such a *fist clench* man thing to do. Like oh you were mean to me and ignored my gift so I am going to throw a fucking tantrum smh Raziel bro smh
also ily
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