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gayspock · 2 years

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ok trek dump of recent thoughts

- i really cant remember much about the reckoning, as an episode - except for... well. its just, its so strange. it FELT like what happened in there should have been important but it really didnt feel like much to me. and again ive said it before- but it IS such a shame, bc i really, really do want them to explore bajor and the prophets more, and do them a good service, but... ehhh id otn know.

- i really, liked valiant though. nog and jake centred eps, i feel, are actually generally some favourites- theyre both VERY lovable, you know, but also... realistic, in a very specific way? familiar. like ive said before: theyve really NAILED writing characters that are of that age, as most stuff either makes them too stupid or too mature and i think theyre the right level of very component dumbass pieces of shit. and i think their faults really just... help realise

- that being said i wouldnt even consider valiant a nog and jake story necessarily. obviously it is about them, and they are important but yo uknow like... i just really like that they revisited red squadron. on so many different levels. like, not only does this kind of pull back the curtain on starfleet itself- the fact that yes, babe, it IS a military ... and obviously that has been approached during the run of ds9 a lot already, but this explores... that whole other gross aspect of how predatory and brainwashing it is. these, like, kids (i mean? young adults- i would assume theyre MY ageish, at oldest which not right at all there babe) being so willing to die. and moreover its also like...

- ok im not going to engage in wesleydiscourse bc honestly this isnt abt him but OK LET ME. let me touch on it a LITTLE. gifted kid narratives in stories... i very rarely like them , and sorryyyyy for the amount of talk im abt to do abt gifted kid syndrome etc. etc. bc i KNOW!! BITCH, i know, but like... see the thing is: in principle i dont hate the idea of exploring, like, extremely gifted and young individuals. but the writing never... does it right. there was a lot of that with wesley in early tng- WHICH, by the way? its one of the reasons why i do like to defend this little guy (other than the fact i think ppl are fucking WEIRD) bc like. i really do not think wesley himself was annoying but instead it was literally. all of the early tng writing which sucked so fucking badly.

and i think with lots of "gifted children" characters they weirdly infantalise them but also jsut. make them totally infallible in the weirdest fucking ways. like i said: early tng is written soooo rough, babe... but i remember there were so many episodes where characters would just be bent out of shape and written to act stupid as hell, so that wesley can do the smart thing. which is like. again i see why people are then annoyed at wesley in that case but frankly. it jsut doesnt... READ right at all like. you just made everyone kinda frustrating to watch in this episode. if you WANT wesley to save the day theres more elegant ways to do this than just... screwing over everyone but ok. its like you have to be more balanced with your approach here my love.

(and it was most egregious with wes, but frankly- hell... theres lots of picard instances, too, in tng that kinda just make me roll my eyes. where its like- the ENTIRE episode plot will not include picard at all. it will be narratively unsatisfying for him to conclude the episode's issue, rather than the people actually involved who have DONE all of the legwork todeal with the situation, and wherein it would actually MEAN something if they get to do the resolution. but then they just.... randomly bring in picard to do a speech to end the episode anyways. and its like i get it hes the captain, you want him to look sooooooooooooo competent- but i literally... do not want to see that bald cunt right now. its like its just SLOPPY you know bc if you want to have that moment of picard making a speech, then write the context for it? actually build it up? dont jsut... randomly slap it in like my goodness gracious. bc again ur just... robbing other characters and doing him himself a disservice bc ur just kinda. making it more irritating than anything anyways OMG)

omg im getting sooo off topic and anyways its WHY i liked wesley a hell of a lot more in later stories, his last one with the traveller notwithstanding (as they... literally went back to insisting he was oh so special just? for no reason!? i guess??? and putting him on a weird pedestal- which is so... contrary to what they'd done more recently). bc its never HIM who was irritating but literally. tng incompetence early on. LIKE, for example!? his run-in at starfleet academy, where he almost got expelled... that was literally my favourite wesley ep i think. like i WANTthat you know. i wanna see a little guy whos very clever and talented and does have a good heart- like give it to me, baby.... but i want you to actually write me a character whos living that life rather than writing an episode around a character whos just that if that literally makes any sense.

- anyways where was i im so rambly im very ill have i mentioend that i mean im not very ill but ive been wrong in the head for days

but yeah . thats what a lot of these cadets also really felt like. where they are all clearly extremely gifted and intelligent and wonderful kids but also... very fallible in their own rights. and i think its also like- theres a self awareness here that i also really appreciate and its actually ok.

ok BACK to wesley discourse for a SHORT, short second. i feel bad im about to vague someone here i dont mean it in ill intent but someone in a tag (NO idea who it even was but hmm i cant remember if the post circulated a lot or if it was a rando personal one- it just stuck with me, and either way idc abt op i dont mean it this way but like) ppl hate wes bc they hate ND kids - or at least, it was that effect and i think yes i agree thats ehrm. definitely a motivating factor but i do also feel... very uncomfortable as an ND person who was also a "gifted kid"- and i know eye roll babe, eye roll but like... my actual point here is like... ehrm. the white audacity of that<3.?! HELP SORRY ITS JUST- yes i do think its facilitated by that, but also... please dont just... flat iron the whole thing bc there ARE some parts of wes' situation specifically regarding his NDness that do kinda. make me uncomfortable with the way hes treated. BECAUSE its the (white) culture of gifted kid burnout on tumblr dot com just being. infuriating and insufferable so so fucking much of the time. like YES. yes i agree it all sucks a lot. its- its bad, and again i KNOW babe its not right bc ive also been there too but like... we all also got fucked over for one, and furthermore... you are very much sorta going over your own privilege here like. sorry to say that babe sorry but its just- bc thats.... what i see a lot of when i look at wes also. and the script is never aware of that like

yes i think hes a lovely boy and whatnot. but you cannot deny... the absurd special treatment you have to get, where you're allowed to work on the bridge of the flagship of starfleet bc you've been clever once or twice and the captain was besties with your dead dad . like its . exactly how gifted and talented classes work irl: select kids are cherrypicked, and not by any proper metric, to be handed more opportunities and to be given a leg up in literally EVERYTHING... and not only that theres. and theres- again theres some eps in particular with wes- god.im sorry i cant remember which ones its been so long since early tng for me rn but its like (squeezes myself) HMM WHAT WAS IT. where like wesley will say something thats "right" and ppl wont exactly take him seriously and its like thats shown as a bad thing and i agree its not good that they dont listen to him all the time, but also.. i do not at all feel comfortable with the way the show used to sometimes reward him, bc he was "cleverer" than everyone else and went over everyones heads to do what he thought was correct? like- again uh... gifted kid environments. ive known so many ND white boys especially who just... get off so easy with shit and praised for stuff like that and its not right and its not fair and i KNOW its not that deep within the context of the show. (LIKE IM BEING WAYYYY TOO SDIOGJSDGPJS- like fyi i dont rllyhate wes. frankly i should be taking potshots at aos kirk because i KNOW hes way , way, way fucking worse, but im aware of the plot of aos and thats it i havent seen it because i know it would boil my blood) but the way its written babe you know what i mean... like yes things did all work out- bc its fiction, and thats how its written- but also you just cant guarantee that! and yes i know its sorta elitist to insist that ppl have to have went through starfleet to be respected in SOME ways but also... like. i do think that without adequate, rigorous training and being tested that your expertise, YES, should sometimes not always be listened to!? bc like- youre on a fucking spaceship, babe!!! like- i know hes clever.. but also im like. cringing a lot bc i dont think smartness should just GET you such amazing opportunities, like... im thinking of all the ppl in starfleet who probably worked tooth and nail and proved themselves repeatedly through hard work and its like... bestie arent ANY of them allowed to have work experience on the flagship. why is it that the kid that hangs about but they see him and theyre like wow hes pretty smart. let him do it i guess like its just- SORRY omg im taking this too personally here... my point is its that sort of. privilege that comes with a lot of white, nd boys who like. yaaayyyy.... their nd qualities definitely do not get them treated right, but theyre let off the hook way too often whereas like. poc and many girls are treated like. absolute fucking dogshit. and often traumatised in very serious ways by the education system because of the racism and vilified and never afforded the same opportunities. black kids,other kids of colour esp... they'll be called rude and violent and all sortsa bs if they ever. TRIED any of this- and you know, anyways i might delete this all bc this is too ranty andits getting less abt wes now and more about the general culture of fucking gifted burnout kid syndrome thats been pissing m off so much again recently its sick in the head my g

ANYWAYS my point is. i loved this episode bc what they DID with red squad was like- like i said. tng was never self-aware with the ways wes got major favouritism and therefore could never criticise it. whereas HERE... its really showing 1) how that facilitates such a fucked up fucking culture, because you CAN be so talented all you please but sometimes you really do NEED the experience, you need to have lived through things before you make big decisions to fully fathom what you're doing. wow my god: of course it feels so good to say we WILL risk it all, we KNOW we must be right! but sometimes theres things you just wont anticipate and you also jsut.... its so good to saayyy that but you have to really fucking know what youre risking sometimes and 2) how that in of itself can give these kids such a fucking . complex and how this pressure isnt right to put on them its fucking them up too and like... this closed system of kids who are absolutely convinced theyre special and good enough to be doing all of these things and that they know just as much as the adults who do these things and can therefore make these executibe decisiosn my goddd and THE BRAINWASHING BITCH. i think i rambababled abt that above and up there didnt i just. whereinits like- theyre DEDICATED to this way, to dying for this cause like.... girl this is fucking horrifying? like this is a franly horrifying insight into what starfleet is cultivatinfg, whether this specific thing was intentional or not the actual... structure of thought they instilled in these fuckin kids man . hi. like-

-i thibk ineed to shut up it wasnt that good i cant keep talking like this for a bajorian years bc i just got sidetracked there soo badly eek l olz

- i cant go into detail with profit and lace. theres not. i cannot fucking unpack that. what i WILL say, if you literally cut out the plot itself and what this episode is doing, structurally... they really are improving with the ferengi eps otherwise. early ds9 ferengi eps just really did not do it for me but a lot of these later ones usually hit the right tone and humour and pacing that it works. like this episode obviously fucking sucks but like.. again. structurally. functionally? i donr know. im not very good at analysis isnt it quite clear... #womeninstem #ihaventdoneenglishsincegcse<3 so im never quite sur ehow to PUT it omg its not my talent is it girlie. hrm. theres just this certain RHYTHM to the script now that just feels so right- even if the actual episode itself sucks... like theyre honing the art of writing ferengi eps i guess. wherein the earlier ones they weren't quite right: both in subject matter, but also more primarily that execution and now ... these ones yeah they do kinda rock with involving so many of them and leaning more and more into the comedy that really works well. but this episode is still rotting from the inside. in ways i cant even think of because they begin to melt me.

- ....

- ITS JUST!

- HHHOW BABE HEDLP HOW CAN YOJ... ITS LITERALLY EVEN WORSE THAN TURNABOUT INTRUDER. ITS LITERALLY EVEN WORSE. IT- I.... holy shit. holy shit. SCREAM.

- AND ITS IN THAT WAY AGAIN WHERE THEYRE JUST BEING SO OFFENSIVE HALF THE TIME I WANT TO SAY well now its just getting camp (takes it and twists it because youve literally gone so wrong somewhere parts of this are just hysterical in ways you could never have fathomed)<3 like the WEIRD. VAGUE FUCKIG...

- BUT QUARK DID FUCK THAT GUY, YEAH? QUARK... QUARK DID... YOU GUYS MADE THAT HAPPEN I AM BAFFLED. AS TO LIKE. I MEAN YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS VERY FUNNY BUT ALSO- QUARK LITERALLY..... SORRY..... NO IM NOT . I CANT TOUCH THIS AND WHAT HAPPENED HERE.

- anyways onto the ep i watched and actually i was going to just comment on this one: times orphan i feel soo bad bc .ehrm oops (blushes) i... really want to like this but its just... its not quite right here is it my love

- like i feel like a combination of: 1. the key themes of this episode have been done way better by other episodes of trek; 2. the extremely weak writing between the o'briens as a unit makes this really hard for me to care, because like you quite literally just ship keiko and molly and yoshi off constantly like... frankly i really was just expecting them to leave molly in the past like that and for there to be no fucking bearing on miles or the rest of the show... bc i literally do not think there would be even if you did that; 3. and theres just some decisions in here that jsut... dont WORK you know? worf trying to bond with yoshi- oh thats ehrm. sweet. and it does git with this ep i guess but like?a very horrifying thing has happened and it just- it feels like... cant we focus on that. this is another one of those eps where it WOULD be hardhitting if you cut out the B-plot. even if its thematically relevant it jsut... i really would rather focus on the pretty horrific thing thats just gone on and its also like. ahhghmmeerr ok hang on not and lasty bc; 4. and LASTLY it just feels like. hm. ok im going to be honest im very autistic and i have issues so osmeitmes i just get confused but it jsut... feels like the way people were reacting to this situation!? were NOT .... NORMAL.... !? like i like that keiko got frustrated- that makes sense that they wouldnt totally understand molly but its also like... nmy ggod it felt like they so easily and readily accepted that this happened to her. i know you guys are adjusted to trauma but- you guys seemed kinda calm1? and then so easily decided to let her go back and i think thats like. again a consequence of the above point wherein i feel like you werent really immersing us in this and its just a matter of execution AND also the second point but it sjsut i dont know... i just feel like i did not care my love. and i should of my goodness me. like i would have liked better focus on the strain and- the actual consequences of this rather than just... a very superficial look at how molly is acting like. i dont know but its also very hard to do that with molly and keiko because uhm. like i said you really havent built proper characters to work with, have you hmmm? have you ds9!? noo yiu havent! <3

anyways end of ramble i need to sjut up

#egg.txt #star trek liveblog

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kendrixtermina · 4 years

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Further reactions to "The book of lost tales":

I appreciate that Idril canonically wears armor and does swordfighting.

I feel like I can actually imagine adult!Idril much better now like in armor and with open hair, distraught but ready to fight while babby Earendil does not yet realize the danger...

My first thought is that Earendil was probably cute in that baby chainmail. My second thought is OUCH, Idril and Tuor always made sure their growing baby had fitting chainmail cause they felt the apocalypse might get them at any moment. Imagine that, imagine them having the baby armor fitted every year or so :(

Its fun how much of the basic structure already exists but most of what you'd consider the main characters doesn't exist or is scattered across various minor roles The only Prince anywhere in sight is Turgon - Except for Team Doriath, theyre all accounted for. I suppose Maeglin is kinda there in name only with vaguely the same role & motivation, but looks personality and background all did a 180 since. Luthien is still pretty much "princesd classic" at this point, not quite the fearless go-getter from the final version - markedly this version tells Beren that she doesnt want to wander in the wilderness with him whereas the final one says she doesnt care and its Beren still wants to get the shiny so as not to ask this of her and also for his honor.

I mean in the finished version Id consider the 3rd and 4th gen royals to be the main characters (well, alobgside Team Doriath and the varioud human heroes) and theyre hardly here. Imagine the silm with no Finrod!

Feanor had no affiliation with the royal family whatsoever, and is also generally less super. He's just the guy who won the jewelsmithing competition, not the inventor of the whole discipline. Still seems to have been envisionad as a respected member of the community who gets called to the palace for crisis meetings and is listened to when he stsrts giving speeches. From the first he already has the backstory of going off the deep end (or at least growing disillusioned with Valinor) after a family member is killed by Melkor and theyre still the first to die, but its just some other rando unrelated to the royals

The situation regarding the humans is different - instead of Melkor leaking their existence, its Manwe who explains that the other continents were supposed to be for them eventually. So Feanor goes off on a tirade about weak puny mortals comes off as a more of a jerk unlike in the final version where Melkor barely knew about the humans and described them to the Noldor as a threat. On the other hand in this one, also very much unlike in the finished product, Melkor dupes even Manwe into being unfair to the elves as a whole. In this the final version is a definite improvement, both Feanor and the Valar come off as a lot more sympathetic and though still deceived he's partially right in some things at least, so you have more of a genuine tragedy rather than a simple feud

There is something to the idea of Commoner!Feanor tho. I guess some of this survived in his nomadic explorer lifestyle and how both his wife and mother (who arent mentioned here) eventually were the ones to get that background of being not especially pretty ladies who are not from the nobility but got renown, respect and acclaim for their unique talent and contribution to society, with each having invented things and Nerdanel also being renowed for her wisdom. Hes sort of an odysseus-like Figure in that sense. I suppose later developements necesitated that Maedhros & co. have an army not just a band of thieves, which means they needed to be nobles/lords. That said this being a society where artisans are very respected and half the lords have scholarly/artistic pursuits going, the gap was probably not as big to begin with as it might have been in say, medieval England. Esoecially since Nerdanel's father had been given special honor by one of the local deities and that the social order might have been a very recent thing in Miriel's time. One might speculate that the first generation of Lords started out as warriors during the great journey, or perhaps just Finwe's friend group.

Also found that bit intetesting where the Valar have to deal with the remaining political tensions and effects of Melkor's lies on the remaining population in Valinor... - i guess with the change of framing device it was less likely for news of something like this to reach Beleriand. That, or the existence of Finarfin and his repentance made this go smoother this over in later cannon

Turgon's go-down-with-the-ship moment reaaly got to me. Im half tempted to write a fic where his wife, siblings and dad glomp him on arrival in Mandos. I dont care that none of them exists yet in this continuity i want Turgon to get hugs

I love all the additional Detail that got compressed out in the shift from fairytale-ish to pseudohistoric style especially all the various Valinor magic insofofar as it is compatible with the final version - particularly love the idea of the connection between the lamps and the trees that is now integrated into my headcanon forever

Its actually explained what the doors of night are

If I had not already read unfinished tales or volumes X to XII where this is also apparent, this is where I would say: Ah so the Valar were supposed to be flawed characters. Manwe has an actual arc; by the time he sends Gandalf he finally "got" it. I think in the published silm the little arcs of Ulmo and Manwe are mostly just lost in compression/ less apparent when only some of the relevant scenes got in but not all

It occurred to me way too late that the "BG" chars are the most consistent because theyre at the start and most stories are written from beginning to end. Finwe doesnt get a dedicated paragraph of explicit description until HoME X but my takeaway was that he's described pretty much like I always imagined him anyways/ same vibe I always got from him... charismatic, thoughtful, enthusiastic, sanguine temperament, brave in a pinch but at times lets his judgement be clouded by personal sentiment (though that last bit is more apparent/salient as a character flaw once he became the father of a certain Problem Child) ...i guess this would be a result of jrrt having had a consistent idea of him in his head for a long time.

This means Finwe's still alive at the time of the exodus which is just fun to see/interesting to know... Interestingly he sort of gets what later would be Finarfin's part of ineffectually telling everxone to please chill and think it over first while Feanor simply shouts louder (which is consistent with his actions before the sword incident in later canon where he initially spoke out against the suspiciozs regarding the Valar) - but its not exactly the same, he's more active than Finarfin later in that when "chillax" availed nothing he said that then at least they should talk with the other Kings and Manwe to leave with their blessing and get help leaving (This seems like it would have been the clusterfuck preventing million dollar suggestion in the universe where Feanor is related to him and values him) but when even that falls on death ears he decides that he "would not be parted from his people" and went to run the preparations. I find it interesting that the motivation is sentiment/attachment (even phrased as "he would not be parted from [his people]" same words/ expression as is later used for the formenos situation), not explicitly obligation as it later is for Fingolfin (who had promised to follow Feanor and didnt want to leave his subjects at the mercy of Feanor's recklessness )

Speaking of problem children. It seems the sons of Feanor were the Kaworu Nagisa of the Silmarillion in that originally all they do is show up at some point and kill Dior as an episodic villain-of-the-week. And then, it seems their role got bigger in each continuity/rewrite... probably has something to do with the Silmarils ending up in the title later making it in the sense their story that ends and begins with them. They have zero characterization beyond "fierce and wild" at this point, though in what teetsy bits there is we already have the idea that Maedhros is the leader and Curufin is the smart one/shemer/sweet-talker, though not the bit where Maedhros (or Maglor, or anyone really) is "the nice one". Which I guess explains why "Maglor" sounds like such a stereotypical villain name.

"The Ruin of Doriath" was purportedly the patchworkiest bit of the finished product, but I never noticed and it actually left quite an impression of me upon first reading, the visual of Melian sitting there with Thingol's corpse in her arms contemplating everything thinking back to how they met... she had the knowledge to warn him not to doom himself but couldnt get him to understand it because he doesnt see the world as she does.... After reading this though I wish there was a 'dynamic' rendition that combined all the best bits like, youd have to adapt it to the later canon's rendition of the dwarves, have Nargothrond exist etc. But i mean that just makes Finrod another dead/doomed relative of Thingol's whom bling cannot truly replace, like Luthien and Turin. In the Silmarillion you could easily read it as just an "honoured guest treatment" but here and in unfinished tales I get the impression that Thingol actually did see Turin as a son.

Already you see the idea of trying to make the stories all interconnected but there is less than there will be (the human heroes aren't related yet and there is basically no Nargothrond, which is later a common thread for many of the stories - a prototype shows up in the 'Tale of Turambar' tho complete with half baked prototypes of Orodreth and Finduillas

O boi im not even through yet

#silmarillion #the book of lost tales #history of middle earth #baby reads HoMe

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rqs902 · 4 years

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enyu’s mom calls him "公子哥" is he rich or is this a JOKE LOL and his mom is at a bar IM CRYING HAHA

i just get a feeling youku eliminated shiwei for dramatic effect...

but aw xue en crying over weihao and mxy saying star master kids are all worthy to lin mo

L O L i was gonna be like oh thats nice enyu’s dad asked about his friends, he’s really been paying attention but then he starts throwing these

L O L I SEE WHERE HE GETS HIS REALNESS FROM HAHAHHAHA

LOL NOW HE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS

omg xikan wanting to call luo zheng!!!! im grateful theyre still close, theyre doing such different things now

awww mubo !!! being all supportive and protective of zuo ye

hHAHAHA omg fan yu talking on the phone to renyu is so cute, so expressive with the gasp when renyu says they just recorded elims and then the AHHHH and OH MY GOD when he says he and zaixi were eliminated and the ALSKJLAKS and loud sigh when renyu reveals he just tricked him hahahaha theyre so cute omg can fan yu pls show up at the next perf, id die

lin ran’s “new world new me” im cry

lol renyu’s getting roasted by his team mates but at least they didnt really ditch him

what is this set up anyway? theyre given a mission to leave, so theyre allowed to run around... but not? who planned this lol youku......

LOL jin fan tryin to reason why theyll be ok going to guangzhou

did their group just get special permission bc director li hao?

hahaha ayyy zhan yu jumped first, you go child! not surprised somehow that he’d love it

lin mo’s group went to the same place? LOL but also they seem so much more under control LOL such a guai group

LOL WHY ARE THEY SO LOUD HAHAHAH i dont think ive ever seen people that loud on a roller coaster LOL

LOL why am i not surprised enyu is the one carrying xzx

i cant with xzx and his heelys omg

leave it to csp to relate bungee jumping to some great deeper meaning for zlj’s personal growth hahahah but good on the kid for going through with it. interesting that zixin said he sees himself in zlj so much

HAHAHHAHA THIS FACE

when reminded he’s the hormone representative his face changed so fast im crying

ycw is laughing his butt off and i love how it says “children’s playground” in the background

when ycw gets thoroughly ignored

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA OSCAR’S SSHHHHHHHH AND XUE EN TELLS HIM TO WATCH HIS “LANGUAGE LANGUAGE” HAHAHAHHA

i just realized theres an english speaking line in this group :’) syh, xue en, oscar

awwwwwwwwww them all planning to sing him happy birthday on the dot and setting it up so he can be at the top at that moment awwww thats so fun

LOL the way that oscar cursed his way to the top and is sweating so hard LOL the poor kid omg HAHAHHA

aw he can tell syh drew the card

LOL ITS OKAY OSCAR I STRUGGLE WITH READING TOO

get you a friend like ycw who’ll tell you that you can decide how to pronounce words right, just because its your birthday

struggling to read xue en’s handwriting LOL

HHAHAHAHHAHAHA HOW DOES XZX RECOGNIZE IT’S HUANG ENYU BY FEELING HIS PECS HAHAHHAHA

i feel the need to just say huang junrong looks so adorable in his bright yellow outfit hahah

there’s two types of kids in this group: hjr and enyu screaming their butts off, and lin mo and xzx wallowing in regret of their life decisions

hjr and enyu always saying its too short when the ride ends LOL

lin mo talking real talk over dinner about their feelings BC HES A REAL LEADER and knows how important it is to address this. these concerns are obviously very present in his mind, even when theyre out having fun to relax, and he’s still trying his best to figure out how he can help them and motivate them.

makes sense that they would include enyu interview clips bc hes surely spouting the real talk, but i think its interesting its mainly him and lin mo getting screen time.

enyu would be the one to speak up and say something when lin mo is trying to talk to them though. i think theyre both right though, im guessing lin mo is in part too nice, bc he doesnt feel comfortable enough with them to be as strict as he normally is, bc he knows they have reason to not be motivated and he feels bad for them. but at the same time, he brings up a good point that they themselves need to have their own motivation. it cant just be him putting in effort. and i HUGELY respect that he is telling this to them straight up bc its a hard conversation to have, esp bc im sure he wants them to like him as a friend. but i respect that he knows if they have problems they have to air them out bc lack of communication will be too costly.

momo is lucky he has someone like enyu on his team who’ll actually talk to him with real opinions rather than just hide in fear of disrupting the status quo. literally enyu is the one voicing that he doesnt want takeout and he doesnt want to stay up late, and other people agree, but the surprise on lin mo’s face just tells you that he wouldnt have even realized these are things that are bothering his teammates unless they straight up told him, and thankfully enyu did, bc lin mo thankfully is reasonable and willing to change his habits for the sake of the group TO HELP THEM. hes willing to do anything he can to help them, as long as they tell him what they want from him. huang enyu’s lesson in communication, dont let people guess, just tell them straight up

its interesting bc its clear enyu respects lin mo a lot, says he has the experience and the skill and the right to yell at them to get it together, but hes still not afraid to tell lin mo he thinks lin mo should be more strict with them. and then i respect lin mo for not backing down when being criticized and for strongly insisting that they need to put in effort themselves too. he cant force them to do anything they dont want to do themselves. they themselves have to want to do well.

lin mo is really out here taking care of his group of children and leading them and helping them and looking out for them and im just floored by his leadership yet again. i really hope they can pull it together.

lin mo is a dork and stanning him leads to mostly either second-hand embarrassment or disappointment. from qcyn to snzm, it just always feels like he’s being mistreated and taken advantage of and stepped on, and sad things just keep happening to him. but then he has these moments where he reminds you of why he’s worth stanning. why it’s worth waiting for something good to finally actually happen. and why he deserves those good things. its just so nice to see hes getting some appreciation and recognition for the things he does. at least youku let us see his leadership in action.

totally not surprised akey is there to drive the conversation for their group’s real talk time. tyger co-leader translates clearly hahah

LOL LI HAO TOTALLY FORGOT THE SNZM DANCE LOL

im like not surprised xikan’s group got the least adventurous adventure bc hes not afraid to show how serious hes taking this competition, but also somehow still feel like hes not getting better treatment relative to being number one?? maybe im just overthinking

honestly all things considered im okay with this being the debut group

i mean i love ycw and zry but i feel like this makes sense to me.

this looks scary lol lin ran wyd

but yea even the way they framed the cliff hanger for next week... why do i just feel like xikan is not being treated with the respect he deserves??

anywayyyyyyyyyyyy for 少年營業中

LOL gz’s impression of zlj watching scary movies sounds so accurate im ded

zixin is so adorable!! i love his outfit too ahhah

LOL gz’s sassy response to zlj responding when xue en says he’s gonna talk about a cute trainee with highly regarded visuals

why am i totally not surprised xue en didnt get scared but zixin got scared AGAIN lol

why do i suddenly get the realization that we hardly ever see ycw and zlj interact

it just feels weird to see them together even tho they obviously have overlapping friend groups lol....

poor shiwei isnt even here and they keep talking about him LOL at least theyre not even really roasting him LOL ycw and yzx too nice for that

im just DYING at the cto gege’s laughing SO HARD HAHAHA

and ycw’s face LOL

xue en’s laugh made this ep worth it LOL

wow should i be happy that lin mo is finally in the next ep of this side show, or sad that jin fan never got to appear and itll be the last ep :( im also excited to see lin ran again! wow its weird to think that snzm is ending soon, it felt like the first 7 eps were like a slow burn and now its a mad rush to the end

#rants #in which i get in deep enyu and lin mo feels

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fuckdavestriderheistheworst-blog · 6 years

Note

you too buddy all the SO questions

ugh why damn it i did not ask to be punished by means of talkin about vantas until my fingertips bleed

but fine

Significant Other Asks

1. Tell the story about how you met.

it was over the summer about three years ago and tumblr kept pushing a certain blog at me and upon checking it out i decided to give him some troll asks (which looking back upon now were lame as fuck? what was i thinking honestly)

anyway that became me revealing my blog over tumblr and then lo and behold we had a college class together and we realized we were sitting beside each other and i told him that his major was an “easy major” or something and basically he hated me for a while there

2. Was it a gradual increase of trust and love, or was there a specific moment where you knew “I want to be with this person for a long time”?

it was gradual for sure i went from picking on him to agreein to let him tutor me in english to craving his friendship and then falling in love with him without even realizing

before i knew it i was head over heels and here i am, happy as fuck that im dating my best friend

3. Describe their eyes. Describe their hands. Describe their laugh.

his eyes go from being like cinnamon to being like hot chocolate, in color accordin to lighting and in mood, his hands are warm and comforting to hold and are quick as all hell on a keyboard, and his laugh is rare but memorable, like its dusty from misuse and drizzled over with the annoyance i usually provide him

4. What’s your zodiac sign and mbti type? What about your partner’s? Do things like that reflect your actual compatibility or is it just bunch of bunk?

i had to google what my zodiac was because i think both of those things are bullshit but im a saggitarius and an isfp (or was it istp i dont remember its been years)

vantas is a gemini and...

i dont think he ever tested for it because he isnt internet quiz garbage but hey what does it matter without knowing his results i know that we are a fine match

5. Are you long distance? Have you met in person before? When do you get to see them again?

no, yes, and probably this evening when i bring back dinner

6. Tell me a story about a happy experience you two shared. Something that makes your heart warm whenever you think about it.

something that makes me feel really happy to remember is the new years eve after he got those color correcting glasses and i took him to watch the fireworks and he was so happy and amazed at the color and the show and i was so proud that i could do that for him

7. Tell me a funny story. Did they do something silly? Did you do something silly? Talk about your inside jokes.

one time i groaned into his ear and called him daddy to test and see if he had a daddy kink or not and he was SO into it so now im waiting to call him daddy again when he least expects it

8. Are your families supportive? Does it matter if they’re not?

yeah as far as i know both sides are

9. Would you ever have a pet together? Do you already have one?

we sort of have pets together but theyre also just kinda our own pets but with shared care

10. Do you have children together? If not, are you both interested in raising children some day?

i dont really want kids and i dont think vantas does either like ever we arent even married and also having kids would be a hassle

11. If they’re having a bad day, what do you do to help?

i usually just sit and talk to him and support him like a friend and boyfriend should do its not really anything special but it works every time

sometimes i surprise him with relatively cheap gifts or food too but he doesnt like me splurgin so i try not to make him uncomfortable

12. If you’re having a bad day, what do they do to help?

same thing really hes always there for me to make me feel better and talk things through

13. What’s something that your partner does that would be annoying if anyone else did it, but it’s cute when they do it?

scolding me like he is a third parent, somehow its endearing when he does it

14. Have you ever went on a vacation or adventure together? Tell me about it. If not, do you have plans to do something fun in the future?

yeah weve gone on a few sort of technically

that one road trip to texas we took and spent a while on

the trip to malibu

were planning (or i am) for a trip to europe this summer if its at all possible with our schedules

15. What’s something that you learned about yourself because of being with your partner?

that im enough just being who i am and that i can have a relationship without cash at the forefront

16. What’s a piece of advice that your partner gave you that has resonated with you?

you dont have to bend over backwards for somebody to please them or make them like you just be yourself

not the exact wording but that is the moral

17. Which one of you kills the bugs (or captures the bugs and places them safely outside)?

we take turns but i dont like to kill them unless theyre wasps or venomous spiders id prefer to catch and release

19. Do you prepare meals together? Does one person enjoy cooking more than the other?

neither of us can cook for shit so other people prepare our meals for us always

20. What are the best restaurants to go to? Do you see movies at the theater? Do you do things like golf or bowling, just to bond more?

i like taco bell and pizza hut, yes, and i dont think weve ever done either

21. Tell me about a time that you got into an argument over something silly.

we used to get aggressive over gay chicken sometimes early on in our friendship that was always fucking ridiculous

22. Tell me about a time that you got into an argument over something serious. How did you compromise? What did you learn?

one time vantas said he was disappointed in me and i took it hard and im pretty sure it ended with him leaving but i dont remember what brought it on or how serious vantas had been or how sensitive i had been

we got over it. not sure i learned any super moral from that but it did help me learn about him better in the long run and vice versa

23. Is there a famous couple, fictional or otherwise, that reminds you (or other people) of you and your partner?

will and jada pickett smith

24. Do you have a shipname?

vantder i dont know

maybe film boyfriends because he writes and i sort of direct

27. Do you have extremely similar personalities and interests? Or extremely opposite? Or is it a balance that just makes sense? How do you try to better understand each other? Do you ever have to experience things you’re not interested in, or vice versa?

we sort of click here and there but mostly our interests are different

i know he isnt super into art but he shows up to support me like he went to the award event with me and said he was proud of me and i like to offer up romcoms and movies akin to his interests when we settle in for date nights

he is supportive as hell but i dont think either of us have ever made a point of saying we arent interested in the other’s interests

28. Has your partner ever changed one of your opinions on morals, politics, society, etc?

he helped me to be better about takin school seriously so id say yes

he has also changed my opinion about myself almost completely

29. Tell me about a time that you were really proud of them.

when he got that book deal i was so happy i felt like huggin on him for days

i knew he could do it and it made me real proud to know that he did it and i am STILL proud of him

30. Does physical affection and/or sexuality have a role in your relationship? Are both of your needs being respected and fulfilled?

yeah both are heavily involved and fuck i hope so im not sure how much more i can step up my game

31. How often do you talk? On the phone, Skype, in person? Are you two the type that stays up too late because the conversation is too good to end?

we talk all the goddamn time and basically never leave each others side

i know i regularly stay up hells of late talking to him because i like it so much

talks get so much deeper at night when youre curled up next to somebody you love

32. Talk about your sense of humor, and your partner’s. Do you laugh a lot together? Which one of you is funnier?

were both assholes with sarcasm as our main crutch and im pretty sure we have both laughed at the others expense at one point or another but i would have to say that we are damn near a tie because both of us have a pretty deplorable sense of humor stand up comedy will not be in our futures any time soon

33. Is there anyone who doesn’t like the idea of your relationship? What’s the reason? How do you and your partner overcome disapproval from others?

no i cant think of anybody who is against our relationship

nobody that matters anyway

34. Have there been any hardships that have ultimately brought you closer than before?

i mean i hit my head and got retrograde amnesia and still had feelings for him so i think that eliminated any doubt i developed feelings just because of sex

i didnt remember it and i still loved him

35. What’s their contact name in your phone?

vantas

36. Tell me about what your partner is good at. Are they an artist, are they good at math, do they play a sport, etc?

vantas has stamina when it comes to running and shit for DAYS i thought id die the first time i went running with him

hes also a really great writer and im not just saying that to be supportive i think if he sat down and wrote a book itd get a film adaptation nigh instantaneously

steven spielberg would shit himself

37. Get really sappy and gross for a moment. Be so gushy that your friends would groan in mock annoyance if you told them. What’s adorable about your partner? What makes your heart melt? What’s something cute that they did that you’ll always remember no matter what?

god i just fucking love his eyes and his lips and his hair and the way that he scoffs over dumb “rich guy” things and how good his coffee is when he makes it and how i can NEVER replicate it that good even when he guides me through makin it. i love the sound of his voice in the mornings and late at night when i should be asleep but am clinging onto him and talkin about nothing in particular. i love how he says my name and i especially love that hes the only one who really calls me by my last name so affectionately. i love the way he reads and i love the way he still looks a little too long at colorful things sometimes when we are outside and walking. i love the way his hand fits with mine and i love that we can reassure each other through anything, that we will be there for each other through anything. i can easily see myself spendin the rest of my life with him and if not as a boyfriend then as a best friend

38. Let’s talk about life goals and hopes. Do you two have a similar idea for the future (regarding careers, getting a home, family, finding meaning)? Do you two make a good team? Can you imagine spending the rest of your life with them?

weve talked about moving in together or gettin a house but our careers are pretty up in the air right now except for vantas’ teaching job. i think we make a fuckin great team and id love to spend the rest of my life with him in any way shape or form

39. Reflecting on all of your experiences, what advice would you give to a young couple?

pick your best friend to fall in love with because youll never have a better love than that

40. Is your partner on tumblr? Tag them here and write them a small message, it can be anything.

@crimsongenetics hey vantas sorry for gettin all gushy here i hope i dont make you throw up at school i love you

#ask meme #literalillbeats #((m i s E R Y but THANK U

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theday · 7 years

Note

ALSO!! ALL!! (you can skip '''brian''' if you want hsksjskssm)

we’re in for a long ride boys..... under read more im ready

Wonpil: How would you describe your personality?

i wanna just say pass but we die like men so. im pretty dang sure i have 2 personalities one for online stuff and one when im doing irl shit but lately ive been trying 2 be consistent anyway not 2 toot my own horn but im fairly nice i feel like? i send nice asks because it makes me happy seeing the responder’s answer and i try to give comments on art/fics whenever i can in tags or in the comment section so id say im fairly nice. online its easier to say i love you every second and the love is real obviously so i would say im also a big friend lover?? however ! negative time boys.. im also generally rude which is something that defines me really i used to be really sarcastic on purpose too which has somehow disappeared over the years but whatever i can be mean and i will be mean and i kind of hate that so i wanna try to stop going out of my way to be mean to people who .. well I MEAN this person is kinda asking for it their behaviour is .. disgusting so.... not that its okay to be mean on purpose though but idk man im just shady to people i dont like thats who i am unfortunately yike.. . but i will never try to be extremely mean/rude to my friends and even if i am i will make sure its in a joking manner although i do tend to get carried away so my mouth/hands move quicker than my brain and if i do make any of my pals uncomfortable please tell me so i can corrwct my ways and this got long wtf abyway 2 sum it UP i am a nice but rude person lmao also i try 2 b funny sometimes but.. .. ..

Young K: you prefer sexy or cute concepts?

im gonna answer this anyway lol day6 dont know a sexy

Sungjin: are you more of a childish friend or a mom friend?

i try 2 b the mum friend but only with bell lmao ok actually... im always asking my pals 2 go the FUCk to bed so maybe i am the mum friend... ..

Dowoon: Do you get shy easily?

ya with strangers who are most definitely 2 cool 4 me but when i warm up 2 the people im really wild lmao i was attacking jen like 3 seconds into our friendship the duality of megan

Jae: Do you wear glasses?

my middle name is glasses ive had to wear them since i was 6 bc i watched too much pokemon while sitting way 2 close to the screen im p sure im gonna go blind soon

Congratulations: When was your last relationship?

i didnt even have 1 lmao

Letting Go: Who is someone you miss very much right now?

monsta x :-( theyre grandpas so they dont use twitter as much as our children astro

I Wait: Favorite genre of music?

i dont have a favorite since i can listen to anything and find it nice lol but I really really really like day6′s music so much because i have a preference for bands and day6 make such amazing songs wtf i wait just started playing so my favorite genre? day6

You Were Beautiful: Tag your fave mutual!

if this blog was still just u and me falen youd be tagged but now i have 5 mutuals and i love all of them so im gonna have to pass

I’m Serious: Vacation on the beach or vacation by the mountains?

by the mountains? i cant even live by myself in a house id die if i went anywhere near that rocky and unstable so beach please

Dance Dance: do you know any choreographies by heart?

bits and pieces of certain songs only ive had the i need u choreo by bts (the chorus part) stuck in my mind lately bc bin sanha and mj danced to it in that one video its the best bts song ive ever heard 10/10 idk a dna (i dont even stan bts)

My Day: How long have you been a Day6 stan?

since 25/06/17 i thank boxy everyday of my life for this honestly without her i wouldve never found so many amazing people both my mutuals and the groups i now stan

EveryDay6: Fave Day6 song?

pass but bc they just released their oct tracks so id have to be when you love someone but i need somebody is cutting it real close i cant just have (1) favorite song when all their songs are so different it makes me wanna love all of them

Pink sweater: Describe the worse outfit you’ve ever worn

godt.................. so i was a big power rangers fan back in the day and i really loved the yellow ranger from the dinosaur power rangers idk the name but anyway the person wore this like.. pants? and a skirt over it ?? which makes 0 sense now bc it was jeans and a fucking ballerina skirt shit and i hate skirts but i still fucking copied her outfit bc im gay for that yellow ranger and i cant believe i went out in public wearing a skirt over jeans??? wtf was i smoking so. never again

Chicken Little: What fictional character can you relate most to?

oh bOY? i dont know man? it changes every time i get into a new thing but i feel like theres no character ive actually related to yet? ive only had favourite characters so far

Bob: What’s a nickname your friends/family call you?

my family idk man but my friends can call me whatever they want im cool

Are you a bear: What’s the weirdest question you’ve ever gotten?

my memory is so bad i dont remember anything??? um m idk fam

Terry He: How long is/was your longest friendship?

with an internet friend it was like 5 years? i cut ties with her though thankfully and with irl buds 4 years bc u knw sch.. i doubt we’ll hang out again depending on our results rip

ASC: YoungFeel or JaehyungParkIan?

i breathe jaehyungparkian

thank you sosoosososos much for asking falen wt f i love you my soulmate.. no lie tho the question i was looking forward to the most was the last one

#softshouyous #asks

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benvoliio · 7 years

Note

pls I want to know everything about your OCs I want to ship them

music to my ears my friend pls ship them id Die here are some things you should know for shipping purposes:

the first time they met was after chris’s first day at his new school when he went to get a drink from the local coffee shop, eric works there and the first thing he says to chris (for reasons i can explain) is “do i know you?” chris, who is awkward af and also has never seen this guy before in his life is like uh???? no?? eric is like “oh uh sorry can i take your order” and thats about it until chris is walking home and realizes eric wrote his phone number on the cup sleeve thing and is like aaa?? aaAAAAA?? because how does one react in a situation like this. i dont know.

anyway after that the other three members of the oc squad™ (marin, kit, and jaden) each meet chris independently, they eventually realize all their encounters are with the same guy and try to get him to join their band because one of them (jaden) shared a writing class with him and realized he’s really good at writing lyrics and the others like him too bc he’s a sweetie. also eric wants to meet him again (partially because he’s In Love (although he doesn’t realize that yet) and also partially because of his backstory which i guess i should explain maybe oh boy here we go)

so about eric: this story is set about 50 years from now and obviously technology and medicine and stuff has progressed a Whole Lot so what this means for eric is that test tube babies are now a Thing and he is one. they’re mostly a legal Thing as an option for parents who can’t/don’t want to have children naturally, unfortunately because people are terrible there is a sizeable underground system of politically-motivated-artificial-children-making-facilities. unfortunately for eric that’s where he’s from. he doesnt know it though because his aunts rescued him as a kid and his memories got somewhat erased. so he’s a high school senior with this weird hole in his memories and naturally he wants to like Figure This Out. his aunts told him it was because of a head injury as a kid but he doesnt quite believe them. sO when he sees chris in the coffee shop that time, something about him sparks something in the back of his mind. not much, not even anything you could call a memory, more like a Feeling. but he knows Something is up anyway and because he’s a huge nerd he’s like “i’ve gotta see this guy again to see if it has the same effect, maybe my Tragic Backstory (you have no idea my guy) will finally be revealed”

so that’s the initial reason he tries to hang out with chris a lot, but eventually he ends up being completely enamoured with the guy, and chris because he’s a big romantic dork has quickly fallen head over heels right from the start. they dont actually get together officially though until after i put them through some Bad times for a few months (rip). they day they officially start dating (and first kiss hooooooooooooooo) is january 18th

uh what else lets see hmmmmm do you want some angst?? i can tell you some of the angst let’s do that

eric sort of…. never mentions the memory thing to chris. it’s a sensitive subject, that’s understandable. unfortunately when he does he does it in a way that makes it sound like the only reason he’s expressed interest in chris at all is because of the memory thing. chris feels hurt and reacts badly (he really should’ve kept in mind that this is a really personal thing for eric but he’s human he’s flawed ok) they end up not talking for a few weeks because theyre both hurt and things are Bad. sadly i am awful and things get more painful. turns out those bad guys that are running the secret politically motivated test tube baby place eric escaped from are not real happy they lost one. and they’re looking for him. luckily for us the tracker chip they gave eric was deactivated by The Aunts (which is actually what caused eric’s memories to be buried because this is the future and it’s a super high tech chip). unluckily for us, when eric’s memories come back, the chip reactivates momentarily. luckily for us, this only happens when eric is around chris and the bad guys cant tell which one of them is the escapee they want. unluckily they just decide to search for a chip on whichever one they can get alone first. this ends up being. uh. chris. who does not have a chip. the bad guys are pissed. stabby times. chris ends up in hospital. he makes it through though and eric comes in and they have a heartfelt conversation (communication is important boys) and talk about their legit feelings for each other and apologize for being jerks. a couple weeks later when chris has started to heal up properly and is out of the hospital they make it official and start Dating™ after that theyre that annoying pda couple that are Stupidly Obviously In Love but it’s mostly cool within the squad because jaden and marin and kit are Loving and Supportive friends

uhhh i have so much more info but this post is super long how about i leave you with this link to peruse at your leisure there’s tons of art of them by me (and others!!!!!!) in there tHANKS FOR ASKING ME ABOUT MY OCS I LOVE THEM & YOU

#LONG POST #omg #dorkboyandboyfriendo

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decadenttimetravelmentality-blog · 6 years

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Hutchinson Kansas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 67501

"Hutchinson Kansas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 67501

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""I am interested in purchasing life insurance, but lack general knowledge of the industry?""

What kind of life insurance would be best suited for a 26 year old in good health who is the sole income in the family? Keep in mind that I support a stay at home husband, and have 3 children. No assests and no debt. Thanks.""

Licence and car insurance in different names?

I have recently married and have taken my husbands name. This means for ID purposes I have changed my last name on my driving licence. However out of spite I chose not to change it on my car insurance as it meant paying an admin fee and rather change it when it comes up for renewal in 6 months. Does the different names invalidate my insurance?

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For a first time driver who is 28 who is good for cheap car insurance?

In the uk

Is affordable life insurance possible for someone over 70?

And from where can I get such insurance?

How much do you pay for car insurance?

I'm a 22 year old male living in GA and mine is $770 every 6 months. I've never had a wreck or nufin. How old are you and how much is your car insurance every 6 months. It's confusing because some people will say they pay, for example, $1000 in car insurance, but they don't say whether it's every 6 months or every year. Please be specific as to if it's 6 months or a year. Thanks very much. I just want to know how much more I'm paying than all of you. lol""

Who's car insurance pays for an accident?

I lent my grandson my car one day while his car was in the shop and he had an accident. Who's insurance covers it

Insurance: Get car fixed?

On Friday, I was rear-ended by a 2000 Mitsubishi Montero Sport. I got some minor damage done to my 2004 Mazda 3s. My bumper has scratches and a dimple-- which really isn't noticeable. The car has 100,000 and I'm debating whether or not to get it fixed. I am thinking of taking the insurance money to pay off debt. Should I or should I get the car fixed? Will I get into trouble if I use the money to pay off debt?""

Car insurance costs more than car!?

So i got a 2001 Acura EL premium with 148k a week ago and i was quoted for $387 a month/4644 a year for a car that i got for $4100. I live in Toronto and i know it costs more for insurance but its ridiculous when it costs more than actual worth of the car. Should i try sell the car or keep it as i need it for school and work?

Is minimum coverage car insurance the same as an SR22?

In Tennessee, is minimum coverage car insurance the same as an SR22? I already have minimum coverage but am now required to get an SR22. Is this something that needs to be added on or will minimum coverage suffice? Thanks.""

How much would you estimate the annual cost of living to be in central New Jersey?

This would be for a simple lifestyle- one bedroom apartment, utilities, food, clothing, phone, internet, cable, basic car, car insurance, gas, car maintenance, computer, pet, gifts, and a one-week basic vacation. You can provide an estimate both with, and without, a basic health insurance plan premium. I am just trying to figure out about how much it would cost to live in this area. Thank you for your advice.""

Math Problems about insurance!!!!???? Urgent?

A- You have just bought a new and therefore fairly expensive car. You have to buy insurance. The insurance cost is $1000 for a year but the deductible is only $150. If we assume that the probability of your having an accident in the next year is 10% and that the average cost of an accident involving a car like yours is $5000, what is the expected utility for you of buying insurance? 2- You have just bought a new and therefore fairly expensive car. You have to buy insurance. The insurance cost is $1000 for a year but the deductible is only $150. If we assume that the probability of your having an accident in the next year is 10% and that the average cost of an accident involving a car like yours is $5000, what is the expected utility for you of NOT buying insurance and driving without it?""

Young Drivers Car Insurance?

My son is 17 in January and already owns a car, im looking for car insurance for him as a learner then obviously as a passed driver. Most comparisson sites wont search as he is not 17 at the moment. He insists that he does not want one with a box fitted to the car. Any ideas of companies that will give a reasonable quote would be appreciated.""

Motorcycle insurance?

I'm just wondering how much this will cost if I get one in the future. I'm 17. I have had a car accident recently (last thanksgiving). And yes, I was at fault. I don't feel like naming my excuses... the insurance companies won't care anyway. But don't worry, no one was hurt. So anyway... what prices are we looking at if... 1. I get it now with my parents insurance? (we own four cars... I already have one) 2. I wait until I'm 18 and move out to a college dorm and have it as my only vehicle? 3. sport bike vs regular bike? 4. I wait a few years until the car accident is off my record? No lectures about safety please. just give me some numbers.""

Have lots of car insurance questions ?

hello had a car accident i am not in fault my medical bill are almost $100K the other party insurance accept its fault in the accident and it appears that they have full coverage if the insurance i have is the basic that covers $25K in medical bills so the other insurance tells me that there limit is $25K-$50K how can it be possible that it only covers $25K same as mine if she has full coverage and i don't?? Next question. How can i make the insurance or the lady that hit me to show me the policy??? is there anyway i can force them?? i have an attorney working on the case and he said that the insurance did not let them see the policy but i want to know and see the policy so i know that neither the insurance or my attorney is lying. next question from the accident i was really damage after 6 months I am still going to therapy I have proof of all my bills and doctors reports from all my illnesses in which I have deafness caused from the accident I had a head injury and was hospitalized for 5 days the docs had said that it was really a serious accident including my attorney. How much is fair to fight for pain and suffering, medical bills, compensation for hearing loss including seance of smell and taste, everything I have paid like taxis, pills and more. don't want to take advantage from the accident but how much can I fight for?? thank you for answering but please only answer if you know. this is very important for me.""

How much does a person need to pay per month for car insurance?

If i cancel my car insurance will the rate later go up?

If I cancel my current monthly car insurance plan for my car, will getting a new play later down the line increase its premiums? i am wondering a few months down the line, or other time frames. i will not drive my car after this cancellation. currently my annual insurance is around $5,600.00 I am 24, male, live in toronto.""

Why do people spend so much on insurance?

I mean other than general health and drug insurance.

Insurance companies that insure homes?

Do not have change&a was wondering insurance companies that will insure my home in Alabama

Is my parent ever eligible for coverage on my insurance?

My mother is disabled. Is it possible she can be covered through my insurance?

What is a good affordable health insurance company?

I am 21 yrs old, with no existing health conditions, but I make too much money to get coverage from the state. My employer does offer insurance but it's very expensive and the coverage isn't worth the amount of money they want me to spend.""

""Court date for driving w.o car insurance, what are my likely outcomes?""

I got tagged for driving w.o car insurance in January, now I got a letter in the mail to attend court in a week for the incident. I live in MA where it is illegal to be uninsured and by law your registration also expires as well. I've already been towed and got my car back, now I just have to attend court. Any ideas what's going to come out of this? I have a perfectly clean driving record.""

Car insurance for car hire?

I'm going to Virginia for a week and will be renting a car from rentawreck.com. Would they provide insurance or would I be covered by a joint policy will my mum? BTW I'll be 18 + british. Don't say I can't rent because I can.

What would be the highest insurance group car i could insure when im 17?

What would be the highest insurance group car i could insure when im 17? like the 1-20 ratings?

What type of insurance/coverage do I need to purchase from a car rental company?

I want to rent a car for 24hrs from either Hertz or Enterprise. I dont own a car therefore I dont have car insurance of my own. I already have to pay under age 25 fees, so I really don't want to be be up sold coverage that I don't really need. So if anyone could tell me exactly what coverage ill need to purchase from the rental company, if any, that would be great.""

Car Insurance in UK for a driver new to UK?

I have over 10 years of driving experience, but all my experience is in India. I have recently got the driving license in UK. I want to buy a Car here, but just can not afford the insurance. The insurance companies do not take my over 10 years of driving experiance into consideration and are equating me to a new driver. Is there any insurance company who would consider my driving experience and provide a better quote?""

""What company can I use to purchase private dental insurance in Seattle, WA?""

which dental company can I use to purchase affordable dental care privately, not through an employee? For anyone age 18 and over and would cover basic dental visits and surgery such ...show more""

""For insurance, will a total loss raise my future insurance rates more than a repair? Any idea by how much?""

I filed a claim on my motorcycle, I have read you can do some negotiation in terms of if your bike is considered a total loss versus just needing repair -- EG telling them that certain damage is inconsequential towards the vehicle's safety and it's something you don't care about -- like maybe one small scratch on an otherwise fine fairing, or by getting your own estimates from shops to contest their estimates. I was just wondering what the longer term consequences on my insurance rates might be for it being repaired or considered a total loss.""

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How am I supposed to get Medical Insurance if I'm out of work?

I am 59 years of age. I've been out of work since Oct.'012. I live in SC. I have been trying in vain since 012 to get a parttime job. I live alone with my mother. She is 86 ...show more

Car Insurance?

Im Thinkin Of Buyin My First Car, but my Insurance Is costing 4000, my mates is getin it for 1300, when i tried the same insurance company as him, i got 2500, How could i lower this?""

What to know about cars and car insurance?

okay so i will go out to look for a car in a couple of months and i would like to know what look for when buying a car to make sure i will make a good buy, also i would like to find which car insurance would be a good one to get, my mother told me something about paying once a year or every 6 months and i would like to know which are the insurance that offer that type of paying plan and please do tell me if your insurance is good or bad ... we had an issue with allstate when my brother got hit by someone so, allstate is out for me""

Liability insurance price for honda civic 2006?

how much is the average liability insurance cost for honda civic 2006 4 door and 32 year married driver with 100% clean driver's history?

""If I Buy Rental Car Insurance, do I or My Personal Car Insurance Pay Anything?""

If I pay for insurance offered by the rental car company, do they pay for everything in the event of a collision? Or, does my insurance still have to pay some of the liabilities? Do I have to pay my deductible? I am simply trying to understand how this works. I have no plans to buy the insurance since I have my own insurance and my credit cards also pay.""

19 Y/O searching for health insurance advice?

I am 19 years old, I will be starting college in late August/early Sept. as a full time student at comm. college. I am not employed and my mother supports me. unfortanatly, she ...show more""

What insurance company in bc offer out of province insurance?

Just asking for cheap insurance!

Can you get life insurance if your already sick?

I have life insurance, and my children have the gerber grow up plan, but my husband doesn't have any and now he's sick. He's 21 - in case his age matters - he was tested for lymphoblastic leukemia last night - but no results yet. Probably because it's Saturday. If he ends up having this, can he still be approved by life insurance?""

Anyone have experience with Medi- Cal? or some other heatlh insurance assistance in CA?

I live in California. I am afraid that I might lose my job and health insurance before I have the baby. Does anyone know anything or every been on Medi-Cal? If so how did it work? Or are there any other options in California for pregnant women with no health coverage? Any information will be helpful and thanks!

How much do most people pay per month for life insurance?

I need help with Car Insurance... Please!?

I am a 17 year old male in the UK and have just passed my test on september 2012. I cannot get insured anywhere because they are all charging me at least 500 pound a month to be insured on my mams car (Corsa SXI 2002), i cannot afford this... obviously. I have tried almost every car insurance site and i cannot seem to find any cheaper than 500 pound a month! It is very frustrating because i am a very sensible driver. I need some help!!! Is there any cheap cars that i can buy that will make the insurance cheaper? Can you recommend any cheap or used cars that have cheap insurance for young drivers? Can you recommend any good insurance sites for young drivers? Please any help will do!!! Thank you""

How can I make my car insurance quotes cheaper?

I am a 21 year old, married, female driver; with no ncb and a fresh license (only just passed). I'm looking to buy a Fiat Panda 2004, 1.2L automatic (insurance group 2)...the cheapest quote I've found for this car is 1300 and that was using moneysupermarket.com I've tried other search engines such as compare the market and go compare; and insurance companies like diamond and sheila's wheels and have been quoted anywhere between 1600 and 3000! I've also tried adding my husband or my mum to the policies, but this only increases the price... Can anyone recommend any other site or insurance company to try? And please don't just comment to criticise on my choice of car as I'm not interested. Thanks :)""

Can I drive my friends car without insurance?

I don't own a car. I don't have auto insurance. If I borrow a friends car, am I covered under his insurance? is there a special type of insurance for people like me?""

Motorcycle insurance in Guam?

Individual has military orders to Guam and is ONLY shipping a motorcycle (no POV). Most company's I've called will only cover auto insurance and let you add a motorcycle policy to make a combo. Does anyone know of independent motorcyce insurance policies covering overseas (particularly Guam) without having to insure a vehicle along with it? (I've tried most big named companies and even the independent companies on the island, and so far no luck!)""

""Since we pay for car insurance in case sh-t happens, shouldn't we get that money back if sh-t doesn't happen?""

Car insurance is the biggest rip-off ever. I hate paying it. Sooo in case stuff happens, insurance takes care of it but then your rates go up!?! WTF? So if nothing goes wrong for a full year, shouldn't we get our money back?""

Whats a cheap major health insurance plan?

im paying way too much right now and need a cheaper plan

How does go auto insurance payments work? ?

Like if your bill is due on the 18th and you have a 10 day grace period which would make it be due on the 28th but you don't get paid til the 2nd? Do they charge you a late fee or do they cancel your insurance?

WHO HAS THE CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE (FULL COVERAGE) AND THAT'S NOT GEICO?

I just had geico and I would like to change car insurances. Whose rates generally have lower down payments and monthly?

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance?

I'm a 17 year old female that will drive a Vauxhall Corsa but it's kind of old like this one: http://www.ajb-enterprise.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/vauxhall-corsa-club-2001.jpg Does the amount of lessons/make of car/pass score change the price of insurance? All the insurance sites want me to enter my details, which I don't want to do. Is there a big difference between cost when I'm 17 compared with 18? Sorry for all the questions but thanks (:""

Which auto insurance companies use Equifax?

My credit score is highest on Equifax. Does anyone know which auto insurance companies use Equifax to provide quotes?

Insurance question for my situation?

What do you think would be the cheapest insurance company to go with in this situation? 16 year old female, 1992 Ford F 150""

Anyone know any good insurance?

Does anyone happen to know of any good insurance companies that may help pay for some of the initial tests for infertility?

Auto insurance claim?

My car came out of the autobody shop this week and I paid my deductible based on the insurance. Now my insurance expires the same month. I am transferring the title over because I wont be in the states for next two years and leaving at the end of the month. Will I get a surprised invoice from the auto body shop because I didn't renew my auto insurance and the insurance company decide not to pay? Thanks in advance

Can the insurance company really auction off my car?!?

there was a wreck. they towed my car. i thought i would get it back. my insurance claims guy emailed me this-- Your vehicle is currently on its way or has arrived at a salvage yard in Defuniak Springs. An employee with Progressive will be inspecting it today or tomorrow to determine the value. That employee will then be in touch with you to discuss how we can settle your vehicle claim as a total loss. The vehicle is then sold at a salvage auction; it is not returned to Progressive or to you. We will be able to discuss this in further detail after your vehicle is inspected. i worked and paid for this car. its old but i want it back, the front is wrecked but its mine. what can i do?""

Are there any ways to make car insurance chaper when your 17?

In october im going to be 16 and neither me or my dad want to pay the massive charges for insuring a teenager that has just passed there test at 17. What i would like to know is if there is anything i could do when im 16 that would make the insurance cheaper, for example getting a scooter and riding that so i have one years no claims or getting driving lessons in a private area where it is legal. Or am i going to have to pay the massive insurance charges no matter what? Thanks for your help Daniel""

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To restart car insurance they want money down?

I was paying $140 a month for 6 months of car insurance. Around the 6 month mark or a little before i said i want to cancel and they said if i cancel today i wouldnt owe anything and my policy be good until 6-22-2011 (i called in may). I tried to restart the policy today and they want $290.04 down,which includes $143.68 for any previous balance and/or any state-mandated fees or charges* If there was a previous balance why did i not owe anything???""

Where in missouri can i get insurance with a suspended license?

i know it all depends on what state ur in and the guidelines, but does anyone kno wher i can get cheap car insurance with a suspended license. i need to get my car registered but cant do it without insurance, plz only answer if u kno insurance companies specifically that will allow me to get it""

Is it legal in the state of Kentucky to own a car without auto insurance if I don't drive?

Rental car insurance?

I just rented a car from Budget and it being my first rental, I wasn't exactly sure of all the terms and conditions... unbeknownst to me I could have used my own full coverage insurance with me. I flew out of state and rented a car for the wedding and just assumed I would need to buy their insurance policy, no one ever told me different. I did take my policy with me, but was never asked for that information. Then I get the bill back and they charged me 32.50 a day! Has anyone ever had this happen and how lenient are they if you've already returned the rental? Anything I can do? I'm back at work and won't be able to call in until this afternoon, just wanted some feedback. Thanks in advance.""

Can someone tell me what the cheapest car insurance is for college students?

Can I suspend my car insurance?

I am 18 years old, male, clean driving record, good student, going to college. I will only be going home for occasional weekends, and vacations, and I would like to be insured so I can drive my car (saturn 2000 sl) around. I want to have coverage when I need it, but don't want to pay for a whole year of car insurance. I do not know a lot about car insurance but, Is it possible to just call up my car insurance company (MetLife) whenever I want and suspend or unsuspend my car insurance? This way I don't have to pay for a whole year of car insurance when i am only using it for weekends, week breaks, or winter and summer vacations (probably 5 months per year). Is this a normal practice? Thanks!!""

Insurance on a reeeeeeally cheap car?

So here's my story. I want to learn to drive standard before I purchase my serious car but the thing is, I dont know how! Now, I've asked almost everyone I know that can drive standard to teach me but no one has kept their word. I found a cheap car that's standard (has a turbo too!) for a really low price. When I'm driving the car home (when/if I buy it) and when Im driving around learning how to drive a standard, do I need insurance on the car? Is there anything I can say so to the insurer so that I dont have to pay that much insurance? I plan to drive the car for maybe 2 weeks until I'm confident driving one. How about license plates? Do I need to buy a new one? Can I just renew an old plate I have laying around? Thanks!""

So how long and how much will this type of insurance cost ?

Who has the cheapest auto insurance in California?

I have a second car that has been inop and I want to sell. I only need insurance for about a month.

What happens if you are about 10 days late paying for your car insurance?

School is about to start, and i have an insurance payment coming up on the same week i needed money the most to pay for school supplies including a graphing calculator that costs over $100. If i spend this money, i won't be able to afford car insurance till the week after and i might be 7-10 days late paying for car insurance. Will anything bad happen if i'm late?""

What car insurance should I use?

I'm 17, I live in Texas, and my mom is making me get my own car insurance. which would be the best and cheapest for me?""

What are the cheapest cars to insure for a 17-year old?

What cars would give a 17-year old just-passed Male a reasonably cheap insurance? Is Ford Ka a good choice? How much are these cars and what do you think would be their insurance from this information?

Car insurance when buying a new car?

I may be buying a new car this weekend but the renewal on my current car insurance isn't due until December - what is the usual procedure for this? Do I just call them and advise of the change of car and pay the difference? Also will my new renewal date then be in October every year? Or will I still then have to renew in December?

How much is Motor Cycle insurance?

I'm 21 years old female and have had my license for 3 years, I went to driving school. So what would be my car insurance for a motor cycle each month? Is it more or less than a car? and if you don't want to answer can someone direct me to a source? Thaaaanks! <3""

Insurance companies that offer...?

insurance for cars that are not yours.... ie cars that you rent etc... is it worth getting it? It's time to renew the insurance for my car, and as i was comparing quotes.. i was wondering should i get the extra insurance that covers rental cars..... or is it just a waste of money? The past couple of years ive had it added to my insurance..... but didn't really fly anywhere, where i needed to rent a car, and have not moved nor am i planning on moving.. but in case in an unforeseen event i have to rent a car............. my two main questions are 1) would the insurance that a rental company offer on their cars be cheaper than the insurance that my own insurance company offers for the rental... or about the same?? 2) if one was to have insurance for rentals, would the rental companies care about it, or force their own insurance upon you? Also..... if they were to accept your insurance company's insurance for their rental.. how would they do it? do you have to fill out extra forms etc? because if its a lot of hassle, and their rates are the same.. then there's no point in adding the rental insurance to my regular insurance right??""

How do I get car insurance if my car was stolen?

I wrecked my car recently & was given a ticket for no insurance. My car was stolen shortly after & now I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do about the ticket or getting insurance. The court date is approaching very quickly! HELP PLEASE!

What a good auto insurance for a college student?

going to be my first insurance so i really wanna get a good n cheap insurance

""Car insurance help, please answer!?""

im 19 years old got my license when i was 18, im moving in with my grandma for a year or so, would it be cheaper to put me on her insurance?""

Progressive is hiking my Massachusetts car insurance rate by 23% this year! Is that normal?

My policy is about to come up for renewal and they're going to hike up my rate by 23%! I just talked to their customer service person and she said they're doing it all over Massachusetts. Are all the car insurance companies raising their rates so much in Massachusetts? Was there some law that passed which changed their profit margin or something? Is there another car insurance company that will give me a better deal?

How much would insurance cost for a 2010 Camaro?

My mom told me if I get a 3.0 this semester and throw in about 5,000 dollars to help then she would get me a 2010 camaro for christmas next year. She said it has to be the v6 base model. I'm 16 years old, a junior in highschool, a guy, my grades are decent, and the cars gunna be white with black stripes, not sure if that affects the price, but its gunna be automatic and my First car. I know some people think are gunna say im stupid for spending soo much on a first car but I really don't need to hear that from you. All I need to know is how much insurance is going to be since im the one paying for that with a part time job.. so what do you think is the cheapest my insurance will be?""

""Question for the car dealer...getting used cars for resale rock bottom..Manheim, Insurance Auto or co-part?""

ok.. I want to try my hand ( and if it works .. I will apply to be a dealer or some sorts myself ) at getting cars low price and selling them quick of like 10-20% profit. I 'd like to know what's the best place to buy cars CHEAP ( even if they are sightly damaged ) .....and resell them....Manheim ( I know thats a dealer-to-dealer auction . So I'd expect stuff to be very well marked on the price tag)... copart or Insurance Auto ( iaai as its called ) which one sells cars that are otherwise roadworthy , but very well discounted ( though some might need a cosmetic facelift )""

How does car insurance work? my mom recently wrecked our car-it cost 2000. we have 25000/500 deductible.?

what part do we pay

How does Obamacare make health care more affordable when it only deals with insurance and not with costs?

The doctors and hospitals will still be charging an arm and a leg. How is regulating insurance going to lower what doctors and hospitals and pharmaceutical companies charge?

Medical insurance bill?

hi guys my hubby had a motorcycle accident and he went to the ER, he got a cat scan and x-ray and it came out to be $750. he has no health insurance so he gave them hes name but misspelled like 2 letters in hes first name and 2 letters in hes last name.. they never took down hes drivers licence or ask for hes social number... only thing they have on file correct is hes birthday. even the address is all right but the apt number instead of 7 he put 8, we wanted to know can they actually send him to collection still? like will they be able to still find him even though they don't have drivers licence number or social? and if they can find him will it affect hes credit score if he can't pay.. we are students and are struggling real bad :( so any help from you guys we would really appreciate it we live in California. thanks guys!""

Will I get my parent's insurance after age 18?

I plan on taking a year off of school when I graduate high school. When I turn 18 during that year, because I am not a full time student, will I get taken off my parents health care?""

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https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/safeco-car-insurance-quote-sean-wagner"

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samanthasroberts · 6 years

Text

The Great Dying: Happiness Comes on Day Five

My family has come to Hawaii.

Hawaii, like an aging model, is still gorgeousjust sometimes in a fragile, wasted way.

My parents were here a long time ago; they came on their honeymoon, back in the Old World times. They bought a hotel-and-airfare package to Honolulu. They went scuba diving in the coral reefs and touched real rays and even one dolphin, they said.

Of course thats not an option anymore, but you can snorkel all you like in fiberglass reefs stocked with colorful farmed parrotfish and now and then a robot shark.

I love the parrotfishs bulgy, fat lips.

Lydia Millet

About

Lydia Millet is an American novelist and conservationist. Her third novel, My Happy Life, won the 2003 PEN Center USA Award for fiction, and she has been a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize as well as a Guggenheim fellow. Her newest novel for young readers, The Bodies of the Ancients, comes out in January. The Great Dying is adapted from her YA book Pills and Starships, published by Akashic.

Back then, they ate at restaurants with views of sparkling aqua-blue bays; they went to luaus and drank fancy drinks with paper umbrellas. (We still have those; some of them have my parents names printed on them, from a honeymoon party that was held for them. robert & sara, says the faded writing, hawaii, may 2068.) They took small trips to the other islands, even the one that used to be a leper colony.

These days Honolulu and most of Oahu are seawall and salty aquifers and long, long blocks of abandoned buildings.

But they wanted Hawaii anyway. They were nostalgic. So this time we came to the Big Island, where were staying in a hotel with a view of Mauna Kea. Ive seen pictures of it from way back when, white at the top and majestic. Theres never snow anymore, even at 14,000 feet, but the volcano still looms.

Its just the four of us: my mother and my father, my little brother, and me. Its the four of us here for our last week.

A week is the period the companies usually suggest, once you finalize dates. Any longer and customers can get morbid, or even, if they decide to refuse their pharma, hysterical. And then the whole thing collapses. Any shorter and theres not enough time for good-byes.

My parents arent even that old. My mother had me in her late sixties, and two years later she had Samand though theyre vigorous and healthy on a physical level, on an emotional level theyve decided theyre done.

This would be harder without the training we did at home, without the pharma regimen they have us on. Even with those tools its still intense and vibrant, and everything seems inflected with meaning. Cursed with meaning, almost. Meaning attaches itself to everyday objectstoothbrushes, swimsuits, dangly earrings. Here in the hotel suite, I look at these normal items and everything seems like it portends something.

We just got here and already were on the brink of tears at times, or at least my mother and I are. My father and Sam are trying to act stoic, though now and then I catch one of their hands or a bottom lip trembling.

Meanwhile the edges of objects glow, blur, and fade as I look at them. They all seem permeable or aliveas though the aliveness of objects is there to compensate for my parents being ready to die.

I dont think its the pharma thats doing it, either. Sam and I arent even on a full pill regimen yet. On Day Four well have the option of a powerful tranquilizing blend: Thats Good-Bye Day. They like the contract holders to have their memories intact to say good-bye, because the fifth days pharmathe last pharmacauses forgetfulness. It brings on a long-term memory loss that wipes all memories associated with trauma, so they go out happy.

Happiness comes on Day Five.

Its early afternoon. My parents and my brother have gone out for a walk, and from the balcony of our suite I can see them strolling, their light clothes flapping in the breeze off the ocean, on a trail along the high jagged bluffs.

They carry umbrellas that protect them from the sun but also hide their faces from me. They could be anyone.

The bluffs were well engineered and have been planted to look wild, in a fake way. There are scrubby bushes from the desert, South American cacti and Chinese beach roses (according to the brochure) and even, now and then, dune grasses and sand. They hide the concrete seawall beneath the artificial bluffs so that you dont have to remember where you are or whenso you can almost forget youre not in Old Hawaii. Forget, in other words, that youre living at the tiny tail end of the fire-breathing dragon of our history.

The company my parents chose is a midsize outfit that likes to boast how it hires locals. So our rep, when it came down to it, was a lady my mother had once played golf with.

My mother isnt the golf type at all, by the way. She barely knows how to play, but one time she competed in a small-golf game for charityits mostly small golf these days, unless you have huge money to throw away on travel to one of the big courses, plus water-use finesand because she had a good sense of humor, at least till recently, she was basically the comic relief, I think.

But that one day was when she first met the rep, Jean.

Jean showed up at our apartment a couple of months ago, in the hour before dinnertime when we usually hang out together and talk about our day and stuff. The four of us were drinking cocktails in the living room. Being 15, Sam doesnt drink that much yet, but my mother had offered him a junior can of wheat beer.

And there she was at the doora compact, middle-aged woman from the 10th floor, frosted hair, braided wedge heels. Id seen her in the elevator once or twice.

This is Jean, said my mother softly. Jean, these are our children, Nat and Sam.

My name is Natalie, but I go by Nat.

The woman smiled and sat down and looked at us with a gentle but still oddly businesslike expression.

Your parents thought it might be good to have me here is how she started in.

Sam looked up right away. Hed been reading off his device.

Youre service, he said flatly.

I do work with a service company, said Jean.

She didnt miss a beat and didnt seem awkward; she had a forthright attitude without being domineering.

Youre the counselor, or whatever they call them, said Sam.

Im coordinating the personal aspect of outreach, conceded Jean.

On the contract we purchased recently, put in my mother, soft-voiced. Mine and your fathers.

Sam picked up his beer and drank most of the rest of it, a flush rising on his skin.

I had been sitting at the bay window, looking out over the garden. Our apartment complex was nice, with trees and water features and little striped chipmunks, because chipmunks always poll higher than squirrels.

Anyway, I liked to drink and take in the view.

But then, without really noticing my own movement, I turned so I was facing the room, my back against the view of the trees. In the pit of my stomach was a heavy new stone. At the same time my arms and legs felt light and liquid, like the bones in them had softened.

Why didnt you tell me? was the thing I said.

Were telling you now, sweetheart, said my mother, coming to sit beside me on the ledge. She put one arm around my shoulders. Its all according to schedule. The timing is what they recommend.

They encourage the parents not to get emotive when theyre disclosing. It only makes things worse. So my mother sat there next to me, her arm on my shoulders light, keeping a kind of professional attitude. With her free hand, she shook the cubes in her glass and raised it to drink.

My father stood facing us all with his tumbler of whiskey. His face bore a kind, bemused expression, as it used to when Sam or I would cry and he had no idea how to stop it.

You can still take it back, said Sam, with a kind of hurt urgency. Please, MomDad! Take it back!

Honey, said my mother, we dont want to. Or maybe a better way to say it is that we weve lived for you two ever since the tipping point, sweetheart. Youve been whats kept us going.

The tipping point was when we couldnt do anything more to stop the planets runaway warming. There were feedback loops in the climate system, like the albedo effect and water vapor increase in the atmosphere and plankton die-off in the oceans. So even though wed stopped emitting so much carbon and methane, we couldnt stop the seas or the temperature from rising. At least for a few centuries.

Both of you are practically grown up, said my mother. And when it comes right down to it, you dont really need usnot in the day-to-day sense. You think you do, maybe. But we know deep down that you can take care of yourselves. And you will.

You cant say what were feeling, said Sam, shaking his head. Only what you are.

It helps, for peace of mind, said Jean to Sam, if you keep argumentation for later. During this encounter, this time of disclosure, weve found that what allows for peacefulness is just listening.

Fuck listening! said Sam.

He was bright redlike someone had dealt him two slaps, one on each cheek.

And really, went on Jean calmly, as though he hadnt said anything, theres no rush here. Theres plenty of time. Remember, all contracts are voidable right up until the end. So theres absolutely nothing to make you nervous.

She didnt mention what we all knew: that theres a stiff financial penalty for last-minute cancellations. She didnt need to. My parents knew a couple whod canceled just five hours before their contract was about to start, but at that point it cost like 90 percent of the full price. And they ended up buying a new contract a couple of months later. That meant less money for the survivorsa tainted legacy.

But youre doing so well, begged Sam, turning to my mother.

I felt frozen.

Youre doing really well, youve got your moods well stabilized lately, he added.

No, yeah, son, said my father. Well were not too bad off. Were not personally complaining. We feel so lucky, compared to lots of people. No question. And you knowits not any one big thing. You know? Its not a dramatic situation, theres no particular, exact catalyst here. But we feel like, for one, heywhy not quit while were still ahead? You know, leave while weve got our health. And theres still no impairment. We all saw how Mamie got after she passed 100.

Youll be all right. You have such great resilience, added my mother. Wewe think youre very strong.

Oh please, said Sam.

Try to see it from our point of view, my father said. When we were young, there were still big animals swimming all over the oceans. The rivers and the forests had all this life in them, not just the squirrels and pigeons. You could go anywhere in the worldwe drove a gas-burning car when we were young. We flew on huge airplanes. Whenever we wanted to!

My parents keep thinking, somehow, that one day well hear about how different the world used to be and for the first time well understand them.

But isnt the world always different for the kids than it was for the parents? Sure, maybe its more different now. We get it.

But this is the only world we ever knew.

For Old World people like us, you know, said my mother, weve had as much as we can take of seeing everything go away. And we dont think we can bear towhat happens if, if it keeps going how we think it will.

Of course, we hope and pray it wont, said my father staunchly, tossing back the last of his whiskey. We figure, go early, while everythingswhile theres still hope. You know.

But I knew what he wasnt saying: They couldnt stand to see our future. They couldnt stand to watch us struggle.

Its never an easy decision, put in Jean.

Not helpful, I thought.

But then, the companies put the counselors in the room partly to deflect the family members feelings. Or fears and tears, as they say.

Your mother is so tired, Sam, said my father. He was fiddling with a pile of black and green olives on a tray. The olives were stacked in a pyramid, like in a picture Id once seen of ancient cannonballs. They should have been a tipoff that this was a special occasion, so to speak, because olives arent the kind of food we get every day. We both are, if Im perfectly honest, he added.

We sat there for a while, not knowing what to say.

Eventually Jean suggested we take a walk outside, through the courtyards of the complex. Walks are popular with service companies. Low-cost momentum, I guess, and a natural mood boost.

So we prepared ourselves fresh drinks, mostly in awkward silence, and took them with us into the elevator. We gazed outside as the car descended.

The elevators in our complex are external and made of a shaded glass, so you can see the sky and then the buildings below it, and as you drop, the trees in the courtyard come up to meet you.

Down through the green canopy, down along the tree trunks. Finally we landed facing the rock gardens, the fountains and splashing waterfalls of perfectly reclaimed sewage.

What a nice evening, said my mother, and we looked up dutifully at the fading bands of red and yellow in the western sky.

One thing we do have, in the New World, is beautiful sunsets.

I think what put my parents over the edge was a trip they took a few months ago, a light-rail weekender to the place where my father grew up. It wasnt a coastal town in the strict senseit wasnt right on the beachbut it was on a river delta, maybe 20 miles from where the true coast used to be. When the first storm surges came that couldnt be stopped by seawalls, the town got an influx of coastal refugees. Wave after wave followed, though most of the people didnt stay. Back then they were migrating to places like Ogallala, with fertile land or thick forests. If you look at an old map animation, you can see the masses moving away from the coasts, inward and upward from New York and Florida, from Southern California and the dying cities of the desertLas Vegas and Phoenix, say. The animations look like storms or vast, sky-darkening flocks of birds.

Sometimes, at home, I take a mild mood softener, sit at my screen, and gaze at the animations dreamily. You can customize them to show whatever details you wantthe continent shrinking as the oceans rise plus the massive migrations. I also like to watch the building of the seawalls. You see the swamping of Cape Cod, the swallowing up of the Florida Keys. Islands all over the oceans contract to the size of pinheads, then vanish. You can zoom way out and watch the planet rotate, see the surges of ocean that followed the melting of the ice.

Theres something lovely about it, lovely like Eno or Mozart, thoughespecially without pharmait can be sad.

Anyway, my fathers hometown had been leveled by the waves of refugee camps. Nothing was left of the houses and gardens of his leafy street, the school he walked to holding his younger brothers hand, the swing sets and climbing gyms at the park where he played. All that was gonethe whole town had turned to tent cities and landfills and fields of composting toilets.

My dads baby brother died a while back, a do-it-yourself deal. He hated the service companies. So other than us, my dad has no family left.

For a while after that weekend trip, he and my mother were so quiet that sometimes we forgot they were there.

Before we left for Hawaii, my parents helped Sam and me move to a group facility for survivors who arent old enough to live alone. The two of us will go back there after the trip, to live for a few months till I turn 18.

Then, the morning we left, Sam and I picked them up to catch the boat that brought us here. That was the worst. The apartment where we had lived was bare. Their luggage stood in a neat row against the wall, small cases packed with only bedrolls, some toiletries, and a few clothes. It was a shock to see the sterile whiteness of what used to be home.

Well, said my mother, turning back to cast a glance at the empty living room as we were filing out the front door, good-bye, everything.

Sams coming up the path again toward the hotel building, so close hes almost beneath meI see the circle of his shiny white umbrella. My parents arent with him. I squint: I can still see the two of them, out at the edge of the cliff.

The oceans turning anoxic, scientists say. Its what happened 250 million years ago in the Great Dying, otherwise known as the P-T extinction eventthe biggest mass die-off in Earths history. And now its happening again. The seawaters turned more acid from the carbon its storing, so the ocean food chain has mostly collapsed. Big burps of methane are bubbling out of the water along the continental shelves.

Where there used to be corals and whales and sea lions and seahorses, now theres mostly bacteria and archaea and viruses. The odd school of mutated jellyfish. Plus the garbage vortex and the chemical streams.

But still, Mom and Dad stand at the edge of the bluff, their arms around each others waists, and look out over the faraway waves like anything could be therelike those waves might still be the glittering roof of a marvelous underwater country.

The Fiction Issue

Tales From an Uncertain Future

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/

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somedaypast-thesunset · 6 years

Text

i feel neutrally tired about all of this. you know, i’m not angry or sad or stressed, i’m just kind of tired of this whole routine. it’s become glaringly obvious that this man is very very spoiled and ungrateful.

yesterday was a fine day. he took me to the farm to get a pumpkin like i asked. he bought me food and was overall really nice and in a good mood - he was focused on pei and the things he would do or need for his trip. i felt comfortable and relaxed despite not even having weed and not having much sleep.

this morning when we woke up, we had sex and i went about my morning - made a tea, had a smoke and he had a shower. he asked his mother for the survey plans for their cottage in pei so he knew what to prepare for when he wanted to build this garage (the whole 6 month master plan’s goal). she said she would have to look. this set off a chain reaction - he went to look for a crock pot the family owned but he had never used ad couldnt find it immediately, when his mother offered cookig advice he freaked out ad then when she asked him about a few set of chores he was supposed to do, he freaked out again.

at this point i had literally spoken no words from when we had sex. i was just passively floatig throughout the house, gathering my things just to be organized. i went to look at what he was actually making and he said something like “i’m going to drive you home after this i want to do my own thing and i dont want to be around you”. to be fair, he couldve said “people” - i’m ot entirely sure what i heard but it more likely sounded like you. i simply turned around, got my bag from downstairs, got my stuff from outside and walked home. i did not even reply or say goodbye - theres not even a point. like i would get either some argument about how he said he would drive me home or a grunt goodbye; both still equally rude replies.

but i was kind of proud of how i reacted very immediately and without hesistation. i didt think like ~what would he want or ~whats appropriate to do. i just did what i wanted to do which was leave. it wasnt like oh i think id like to sped the day alone, do you wat a ride home - it was just ‘fuck off’ without being ‘fuck off’. and i don’t deserve that.

on top of this, during sex he asked outright if anyone else has touched me. not like ~oh no one else ca touch you or ~would you let anyone touch you - just outright ‘have you let anyone’ and its not a light thing. its not joking. if i said yes it would hurt and we’d probably stop. but the parameters he stil puts forth is that he “cant” cheat. but what about me? and why am i used like this? i literally spoke _no words_.

its very unhealthy. and i dont believe its about me. i’m glad ive come so far in personal relationships that i am able to seperate myself from them and not take things personally.and like i do feel “used” but its not like this is the absolute worst part of it. he said to me, “you havent been around long enough - this is what i do, im excited about something until im not and then i drop everything and go to the next thing” -- as if i havet been witnessing this the entire time weve been together. its all one exciting thing to the next and nothig is ever what its hoped to be.

and hes very negative. which i guess is a bit ironic coming from me. but everything - everything sucks. and like to its greatest pit of whatever terrible thing it could have. you know - “king of the losers”. acknowledging that “i’m” okay but its really just being on top of a pile of shit.

its just.. its getting too hard to remain optimistic about a future with him. whatever my life is doesnt affect him nearly as much as his does me. my whole life is built around being available to him and i was okay with this becuse it was like “investing” in a future i wanted to have. or i do want to have. i want a partner. some “family”. but i just dont feel optimistic like this is going to lead to idyllic happiness. not the way he sees it. and why should i spend my time following such a volatile perso who is unable to commit to anything. i guess it was easy to walk away because i thought like - what if i was across the country? what if i coulnt just walk away from this rude person and i was _stuck_? i dont want that and i guess if i dont want that, i dont want him. i’m just... too scared to live with him. like i want to live with him. i reall really do but everything in my being says omg no. no no no no. anyone i told that this was a thing would tell me absolutely do not move across the country with this person. its not like.. dont change. dont live somewhere else. its that this particular person is very ... not the right person to do this with. maybe i need to be a ifferent person too. maybe i need to be a very strong indpendent individual who works super hard and hustles lots of cash an then its all just fun and games and wooo life. but i cannot be dependent on this person. they are not dependable in any way shape or form. they are a fucking prayer. and in order for me to make such huge changes in life i would be very dependent on this person. especially right now. maybe in two years ill be a better version of me but the me right now would need a lot of hand holding an encouragement to make such drastic life changes and decisions.

if it was plausible to just get a nice apartment in this city together - great. thank you. not even long term, lets just exist with each other before making giant life decisions. thats a marriage. with no commitment. i cant. i just cant.

and you know - i’m very sympathetic. i know exactly what it feels like. to have no fucking clue what you want, where to go, what to do, who to be friends with, who to have a relationship with - i get it. i’m really confused too. and this is such a shitty time - i dont know if other times have been more shitty but this seems like a pretty shitty time after society going through so many wars in the past 100 years that have grown more powerful under the advancements and like we, collectively, are different people from 50 years ago so what was “right” and “good” 50 years ago is not relevant to today and we are floating without guidance. how do we survive now? weve evolved to a different mental state and we dont know how to nourish this. its like falling into great advancements with no mental capacity to understand their affect on the social psyche.

theyre right. the colective “they” - your parents have little to do with your chances. their social standing and coping amongst evolution to bring them to such standing has a lot more to do with your chances but if along the line you figure out your way of coping in evolution then you may rise above or find your own level of “happiness” which is mostly fulfilling basic personal needs. but when evolution continually transitions through different ways to fulfill these basic needs or possibly gives you even more ways to do this, it becomes more difficult to realize how you will find your way to cope in evolution. milennials are realy seen as weak and a joke; like re-branded hippies but focused on mental health and emotions, “refusing” employment to ‘feel better’ in life when there was a time when people just took any job because the only way to cope within that evolution was to exhance your service for money or boarding itself. thats not the case anymore. society evolved in such a way that this generation is capable of fulfilling may basic personal needs sometimes by just existing; perhaps their parents pay for food and shelter and provide them with clothing well into their “adult” years. many older generations started working to SURVIVE at 12 - 14 years old. our generation worked because “thats what you do” or to save up for an iphone. most of our grandparents worked to buy bottles of milk or to help the family or for their own vehicle but why save for one when your parents let you drive theirs anyways?

and again - it’s not the parents fault. it’s now easy in society for parents to do this. a large majority of parents, nd the majority leads the collective society. could my parents? no. but a lot of people around me did have parents that did this and my parents cared for me in other ways. society allowed them to breed children who would become introspective because they were no longer in such dire straits for survival. and older generations are upset about this - dont you know they had to want to die regularly to survive? why shouldt we?

so as we gain this introspective into ourselves and “new” psychological ideas come up and vast people are “diagnosed”, it becomes harder to accept things which harm our psyche. so we get a big rise in racial inequality and gay rights and things which seem “liberal” but is simply termed this way because some people - maybe a large amount even, could not refuse employment and worked to survive even in this era. that was the generational hand down - exchange your service for money or starve. and theyre not “in the wrong”. other things affect how you build your coping tools - where you live, the climate of politics etc. maybe you realy just had to do that and there wasnt time to invest in this modern evolution of introspection. you dont have time to look within when youre starving on the outside. so this resentmet and bitterness builds between these two sides which may even exist in the same generation but neither of them is wrong. should one work to survive? probably. animals hunt most of their lives. we should probably work to survive. no one can just be handed food ad shelter forever unless you’re a very unique and special person in royalty. and 99.9% of us are not. but should we also kill our psyche? animals dont deal with smart phones and insurance rates and credit scores and bankruptcy. they just go out and take what they want and our society has evolved past this. so we cannot just assume you just work to survive when survival has been complicated. it takes a higher level of thinking which wemay not fully even comprehend at this stage in the evolution.

i think psychology is very important because we dont understand why people are people. we dont know. we know why the sky is blue but we dont know why we are people. and not just psychology but science and the belief of how our being, our physical being on this planet came to be. we collectively have not agreed despite the very obvious misgivings of current theological theories.

how or in what way should you survive on this planet? why are we required to exist as we are in this society upon birth. like all of these rules and obligations an responsibilities of being a “good human” are placed on you for the rest of your life and all you did was be born. all you want are basic needs fulfilled but you cant even do that until you acknowledge the land you were popped out on to does not belong to you so you abide by these rules now whether you want to or not. and thats just government and law but on this deeper spectrum its an obligation to be a ‘good child’ a ‘good citizen’ - pay your taxes, go to work, have children, buy a house; these are the quest objectives. but why? i think our generation is not the first to ask why but the first in a very long long time to ask why are we doing it this way. not so much why are we here. many of us have decided for ourselves. but why are we livingin society in this particular way and what can we do to survive in a society which is not designed to really benefit anyone. its not about that homeless man geting up and feeding himself, its about taking responsibility to feed that person. animals do a better job at this and we feel we’re in evolved thinking.

society has become very convoluted and confused which has bred confusion in its most recent generation. ive lived a very unique life and yet feel the same way abou these things as my peers because the “temperature” of the environment is the same. its hot, we all know its hot an we’re trying to figure out ways to deal whether its running through a sprinkler, going to a public pool or looking ridiculous in a kiddie pool on your front lawn. it’s gross, it’s not a good time, no one wants to do anything and we’re not feeling it. and this evolution is like climate change. there is absolutely still people capable of coping under this stress, farmers still work, lumberjack still cut wood but theyre fucking miserable and they do it because theyre used to feeling like they want to die to survive. but its getting hotter and its getting harder and even though they feel it the only thing they know is to keep working until they cant anymore then die crippled and miserable. being popped out inexperienced and then thrown into a change which even the experienced are struggling with creates a lot of unrest. a lot of anxious and depressed people.

what do we do? what should we do? you cant change society you can only follow the ebb and flow like flock of birds or schools of fish. this is how we cope as humans, to live as a society. and if society is in upheaval it directly affects the ability to easily obtain our basic needs.

i used to feel envious of stupid people. like atleast they didnt ~know this shit. because this felt depressing. like being stupi would be easier and id be happier but those who choose to remain ignorant or passive hurt a lot and they struggle through some of the barest traps society has created durig this shitty time and now i feel sorry for them. spinning your wheels over and over, dragging yourself through the mud, throwing away money, living extravagantly and ignorantly but going absolutely no where. not going up, down, side ways - no where. i’m there too. i’m right there too on the train stopped at the station waiting to fucking go and we’re here nd we’re buying shit from the dining car and we’re chatting and excited but we’re not goig and we’re not really sure why and we’re all talking about why we’re not going but we’re still not going but hey atleast hey still got cookies.

no one person is driving the train either. its like a group effort where everyone on the train has to believe youre moving forward for it to start but if one jack ass thinks youre not, then its a complete halt.

life is hard but i dont think alot of people realize exactly how hard it is. im trying to learn to appreciate the little things. people with greater minds who had better understanding and less luxuries of the era coped with appreciating little things. taking bike rides in the fall in the nice downtown streets; it’s been a highlight of the season. painting in a studio this week; sure it was not glamorous or anything but i actively went out and created art with others. my room is neat and clean and organized. i did laundry with ease on my own time for free.

i wasnt upset i “had to” walk home. i apreciated the fall weather & buzz of halloween approaching, time to think without screens of distraction, exersize and activity, the ability to buy cat food & cat litter. im not angry about it. i’m tired of being angry about a train im not really driving. if i can never truly conceptualize what i want because of society why keep trying. why cry over spilled milk.

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huggpheonix · 7 years

Text

Oc shit

"Wolf! Rae! Margo!" Shouted Gared. Margo appeared before him with Rae and Wolf came behind them. "What is it?!" Wolf asked frantically. His eyebrows furrowed, he was covered in blood and dirt and bruises. He looked so tired and so done with everything. "Its.. Angel...!!" He whispered. Wolf stepped backwards and covered his mouth. His eyes shone with tears as he saw the girls injuries. Her eyes opened meekly and she smiled, a soft baby smile.. She was only seven. Margo kneeled next to Gared and put a hand on his shoulder squeezing it softly. Rae concentrated on extracting the venom from most of her wounds. "Mamar... Rae.. There is no need.. For Im going to perish..." She shuddered coughing violently. Pink blood sputtered onto her clothes and Rae's face. Tears spilled down Rae's face. Rae translated it for all of them in their respective languages. Margo shook and Gared held onto her tightly. She pointed weakly to Rae. "Bright purple.. Ressilience in numbers.. Kind,warm hearted a bombshell.. Rae.. Never forget.. Who.. Loves you.." Rae choked and rested her head into theg irl's shoulder. Angel layed a hand on margo's hand. "Grey.. And black.. Your soul shines with mistrust and grey areas.. Yet grey.. Means a sharp power source.. Youre great.. Margo.. Never forget." Rae translated it with great difficulty. Angel looked up at Gared. "Gared... Neon pink.. With a bit of black.. And emerald green.. You love someone... You love them with all of your heart... Bright,love,kind, a big heart... Dont forget.." Angel coughed again. She finally stared at Wolf. She smiled. Rae had finished translating for Gared. Gared blushed furisouly. "Wolf... Gale.. A huge heart of gold.. You are a complicated kid... Not one to admit your love for someone.. But loyalty and kindness spills over in you... When you love.. You love with all your soul and being.. Treat.. Him.. Well.." She finally lost light in her eyes and closed them.. She stopped breathing. Rae glanced at Wolf, who flushed visibly. She was shooken to reality by a yelling Gared. He screamed and cried and sobbed. He shook the little girl in his arms but could not wake her up. Wolf ran. He ran hard. Rae took the little girl from gared as margo made to hug him tightly. She lay her down beside her little cousin. She then prayed for both of them. Margo held gared tightly. --------------_____________________>€\+|+.'dowksnjcocndowowjdncjownskcdonwosn ndjsd "Hey mom hi dad!" Korra greeted her parents enthusiasticly.she hugged both of them and they all sat down. "Korra! You look so beautiful and healthy! My how youve grown.." Her mother gushed. "My beautiful daughter." Tonraq said with love. Korra blushed and waved a hand. "Oh you guys... Its been a really long time since I saw you.." She said and looked towards the doorway. Outside Asami stood waiting patiently for her que to come in. She filed her nails and looked up occassionaly. She blew out a sigh and looked at the beautiful landscape. "Well, anyways, I uh.. Have some news for you." Korra admitted putting her hands out. Asami smirked and came out from her hiding place. She strode to where Korra sat and took a seat beside her. Korra blushed and took a deep breath. "Now I know.. This might be a shock? Cause.. Like.. I was dating Mako.. But .. It isnt that way because.. Well.." Korra stammered. She glanced to Asami. She mouthed 'help me' "What is this about.. Girls? Dont tell me.." Asami and Korra sat up straight and gulped. "Ugh, korra, how many times have I told you not to destroy my kitchenware.. You know how many times Ive had these remade?" Senna said exasperatedly. Korra let out a nervous laugh and Asami let out an audible phew. "I dont think thats what.. Theyre getting at.. Come now Korra, tell us. You and that Mako kid are.. Getting married.. Thats it isnt it." Tonraq said with a glint of dissaproval in his eyes. "Good spirits! Youre not pregnant are you?!" Shouted Senna covering her mouth. Korra blinked. She looked to Asami. "Korra.. Is trying to say.." But by then Korra had met her lips in a passionate kiss. Asami was so shocked she fell over in her chair and Korra came right down on top of her. They both spluttered and then they erupted in laughter and giggles. Senna had stood up and Tonraq looked... "Dont be ridiculous." Tonraq said in a firm tone. He walked around the table and held out hands to them both. Asami flushed and looked down. She avoided eye contact with him as they both stood up. Senna had come around the table too. Korra looked fearfully at her father. She felt ashamed.. Because now.. Her father wouldnt accep-- Senna and Tonraq both smiled and pulled them in for hugs. "Asami, welcome to our family." Asami was shocked and Korra was too. When they pulled away Asami was at a loss for words. "Youre not mad?" Korra asked quietly. "Of course not. Why would we be?" "Cause.. Shes.. Shes not a he?" Korra said. "Look, you two. I could care less. Plus, if its any consolation, we knew." "You knew?! How did you?! How!?" Asami felt herself asking. "Korra you gaze at her more often than friends do. Youre happier around her, and.. I may or may not have caught you two making out before you came.." Tonraq said. Korra and Asami both looked at each other. Then they burst out laughing and crying. "We love you two. May your happiness be forever." Bap u party favor The used "Hey This is my general partner. She was there when Crazed took us over... This is Margo and Rae." He introduced them. She shook both of their hands and smiled. "I'm Yorse." She said. Margo snorted. "What?" He asked. Rae glared at him. "My name is Yorse. Y-o-r-s-e. Ancient to my culture and clan." "Yeah you stupid fuck." Rae growled at Margo. He only surrendered his hands up and then got serious again. "All joking aside though, we'd really like to know your power ability, I know little of your specific clan but.. I believe you all differ in strength?" Rae said. "Well, I can suck the life out of anything I come in contact with. I can crush bones with my fingers and on tuesdays I can get high out of my mind." Margo whistled and Rae only gulped. "Of course, anybody on my side or for a good cause or who are my friends, dont die. So you two are all g." "Excuse us, but we arent really all that used to english.. Margo can barely string two sentences together.. But I can be the translator." "Of course Rae. Constabel. Where is Furio?" "I saw her on the other side of the party last. She said something about the children." He creased his eyebrows and then took another swig of the alcohol. He saluted them with the drink and then made for the rest of the party. "You'll have to excuse, Colen. He's been hurt by the war quite a bit. Im going to go see to the children." She took a deep breath and then bowed her head. She pulled her gloves off as she walked away and Margo caught a glimpse of beautiful tattoos the likes of which he hadnt seen in his life. But.. He recognised them from somewhere... Rae sighed and pushed him away from her. "Personal space, Marg. Lets go and find the healers. Come to think of it.. I need to see Juke." Margo nodded. Most of the children were very scarred by what they had witnessed and most were injured. They varied in all ages but a lot were kids. "Cranire. This one needs immediate attention, his arm is burned.. But that can be recovered. His face is just scratched up.. Nothing a little healing cant help buddy." She said. She smiled a reassuring smile and then began to talk to him. "Whats your name?" She asked while activating her powers. She sucked out the bad blood and curse and then expelled it. Her eyes glowed a soft pink and then she restored the melonin to his skin. "Seran..." He said quietly. He looked at his arm and his eyes grew wide. "It doesnt hurt anymore!" He croaked. "Of course, little buddy. Healers, we attend to any wound, and we do what we can. Youre a brave little boy, you know that?" Seran grimaced a little and looked away. Cranire glared at Gus. "Im sorry.. Did i say something wrong?" Seran looked up. "I let him go.. I dont know where he is.. And.. I dont know if ill ever find.. Him.." Gus met cranire's stare. "Who?" Cranire asked. "Huse... My baby brother." CrNire bit his lip and Gus choked a little. "I-I m sure youll find him.. Seran." Seran's eyes were sad but a little hope sparked in them. "Cranire. Do you need help? Extra bandages?" A man in bright pink asked. "Ginkr..." Cranire stood up and glanced at the sad little boy. Then he looked at his partner, Gus. She was healing his bruises and staunched the bleeding in his knee. The reslove in his eyes showed as he switched his regular language on. "This little boy's baby brother.. Huse.. Is he anywhere to be found?" "I'd love to assist you anyway I can... Ill go and find a finder." Cranire smiled and then kissed him. Ginkr pulled away after a second and returned the smile. "I love you. Go." He said pointing away. Ginkr nodded and then dissappeared. Cranire sat beside gus and then healed Seran's feet. "Cranire, i think im fine here, can you go and heal another kid? Ill catch up to you after." Cranire nodded and then got up again. He waved at seran and seran returned it. He left for an open spot. Everywhere he looked there were crowds of healers and helpers. The most damaged kids were being attended to by groups and clusters and the immediate okay ones were helped by groups of two and three. The ones with little scrapes and bruises were patched up and sent to the feast with a buddy from a different clan. It was sweet seeing two clans mixing together in ways of friendship and it warmed his heart. They were so young. While he walked to find a kid he saw a two little girls, spenick and Half hero by the looks of it, walking hand in hand. Cranire continued on and eventually found a little girl by the looks of six. She opened her eyes at him . He sat next to her. "Are you okay?" He asked simply. "If I wasnt okay, Id already have five swarming over me." He nodded. "Whats your name?" He asked in her language. "Kratinel, yours?" She replied. "Cranire. I am a healer. Im going to heal your injuries." "You dont look like a healer." She said abruptly as soon as he layed hands on her leg. "Really? Im very curious, what does a healer look like to you?" She considered the question while he concentrated on turning his powers on. He had a little difficulty because he was such a new recruit. He knew he could do it though. "Youre a very honest and down to bussiness person. Honest to a fault. You dont take any shit from anyone. But youre kind. Loyal to anyone who respects and treats you well. Plus, you dont where the uniform." He looked down at himself and then back at her. "Youre a reader, from the Graren clan. They value knowledge and perception above all else." She nodded. "Most healers ive come across.. Well.. From here.. Theyve all been very off point and warm hearted." He snorted. " wow thanks ,Kratinel,i sometimes need a reminder im not a very sensitive person, especially from a six year old." "You seem to be having trouble healing me, are you sure youre a healer?" "Of course, wait look!" He said and she did. Turquiose and purple shone dimly before them and swam in and out of her cuts and bruises leaving them sealed off and clean. He then saw her cut off arm and winced. He touched that part very sensitively and it sealed off and cleaned itself. "I am sorry Kratinel.. I am not a very good healer.. Not like the great Juke.. I cannot restore limbs.." She shook her head, "nonsense.. I am glad and greatful for your service Cranire." He nodded and then began to heal the minor wounds. "I'll get an arjor to fasten and make you your very own arm. Arjors are very skilled craftspeople. They can take anything and make something out of it.. From what i hear." "That is true.. Arjors... They dont get along with my family..." "Look, Kratinel, from all thats happened, its very foolish to think we can go back to hatred and animosity between clans. We need to unite and serve and come to one anothers defence, in order to take down Crazed. We are all the same inside." Kratinel considered those words. "I suppose you are right. I had you pegged wrong. I may be a Graren.. But.. I am young." He smiled. "Alright.. Kratinel.. Im going to take you to the overseer and get you a partner. Then Ill get the arjor." She smiled and he helped her up. "Thank you. Cranire." "No problem." They walked away to the overseer. "Fryn, we have a little girl here." "Ah, Cranire. Youve done a good job on her injuries. I do expect alot out of you, you hear me?" He saluted to her. "Ill see you at the feast, good luck Krat." She smiled and waved. He then left for the arjor. It was only then that he noticed the gashes going up and down his hands. They revealed themselves and he gasped. "Shit." He swore. "You dreyt! You know, youre not supposed to feel for anyone. You know that! Thats the first rule of being a healer! You feel too strongly, too connected and.. And.. " she lowered her voice. "You wind up like Juke Snake." He nodded. "I know! I know, im sorry.. Ill try harder next time. Really, I will." "Look, injuries sustained in these circumstances dont heal. Let those be a reminder to you. You may pretend to feel while you are healing. But do not feel while actually healing." He nodded solemnly. "Those will seal off though." "The notions there then.. Look, Ginkr.. Have you found him?" "The little boy's brother? We have reason to believe he is still in his village... We sent a squad over to evacuate him without Crazed noticing." "What? Hes a baby! Im going." "Are you fucking crazy? You think im going to let you leave?! Theres kids who need healing and you... Youll get hurt.." "Im not a good healer.. I need to rescue that boy.. Ill never forgive myself if i let him die.." Ginkr sighed heavily. He rubbed his temples. "Fine.. Hurry though. Please come back to me alive." Cranire nodded solemnly and kissed him again. He ran off at a fast pace and bulleted past healer groups. He arrived at the tent and found six girls standing there. "Who are you?" "Cranire.. Searcher." He panted out. He grabbed for his knife and staff but was cut off. "You dont look like a searcher. Who sent you?" "Girls, he wants to come.. Let him. Come on Cranire. We dont have all day." He swallowed and slipped on some armor and sweatpants. He grabbed a mask and they all nodded approvingly. "Im Saniteu, Dreyn origins. Grew up in a forest all my life." "Oh, good to meet you." They were all walking briskly and when they got to the forest they would vishere to the point village. "Inere. Graren clan." "Laylpa, Spenick" "Crandiy, Gale." "Sincu, Kechin." "Mari, Half hero." Cranire gulped and bowed to them. They were all so advanced... He didnt even know where he came from. "Theres a little boy and We believe a couple other kids." "Good. The more to rescue the easier escape it will be." They transported and arrived just outside the village. "Alright.. Alright.. We're all good? Watch out for his guards.. We havent seen what he has for servants. They could be deadly." "No match for us though. Right girls? And Cranire." Cranire smiled bleakly. Saniteu rolled her eyes and gave the signal. They snuck in and split up different directions. All was well and quiet in the village. All say except for fire and wood snapping. They heard laughter and horrible noise. Cranire tip toed closer for a good look at what they were facing and almost fainted. At least half a dozen Half hero people all holding the kids in place as a punisher? Lashed at them. "Customs!!! When Crazed is done with you, youll all be equal! No more silly cultures and silly clans!!! All the same in the eyes of Crazed! Bow!!! Do you not see youre resistance? Its useless! Bow Girl! Bow!" He whipped at her but she refused to kneel. Tears sparkled in her eyes as she bit her lip. Whip lashes adorned her arms and legs. She stood in front of all the trembling bowed children. She glanced back at them and smiled a little bit. They were all safe and okay. They werent dead as long as she kept up her torture they would be fine. They wouldnt be hurt. She closed her eyes. 'It will all be alright. Do not listen to this liar. Be safe. Do not be stupid. Ill protect you all.' She thought it and they only nodded slightly. Cranire blazed with fury and seven searchers popped out and it was a frenzy. They had the upper hand because of their surprise attack. Cranire smashed the half hero girl in the back and she let go. The little boy in her grips ran for the trees not looking back. "Keep fighting!" Crandiy yelled. She ran for the kid and dissappeared. Laylpa took on four half heros at once. They overwhelmed her and Cranire ran for her backup. "Mari! Fight back! No! What are you doing?!" Cranire turned around and was hit by the punisher. He saw stars erupt in his vision and he swam in and out of conciousness. Mari was frozen to the spot at the sight of her clan members. She did not move and was eventually the target for all the half heros. They stopped fighting the others and instead walked to her. Cranire was about to be stabbed but Saniteu had slammed the punisher in the head and he wrnt down like a bag of rocks. She slapped him and he came to his senses. He was helped to his feet and she pushed him to the others. The girl with the whip lashes was pushing the other kids to safety and yelling at them to run. To run for their lives and to not look back. They all obeyed except for a little baby who couldnt walk yet. He shook and she limped in agony over to him. She lifted him and ran for the forest towards the others. It couldnt be helped. They all pried at the swarming half heros but were overpowered. Cranire pulled Saniteu away from the crowd. "No!!! Not mari! Not her!" She sobbed. He managed to kick one of them off. And then they fled. Inere and Sincu shouldered their greiving leader and ran for the forest. Cranire took one look back. All he could see was Mari's blank, dead stare. Laylpa shoved at his back and he ran. Crandiy yelled at them all to gather. They found her a moment later and saw the group of scared traumatised kids. The girl was shaking holding onto the baby boy. Crandiy sighed and panted. Inere and Sincu held Saniteu in case she decided to run back and help Mari. Crandiy grabbed Cranire's hand and he grabbed for the girl's she held onto his grip like a vise. And thats something he will never forget. Is the grip like a vise. The kids all held hands with the group and they vanished. They appeared in the campsite ready for healing. Inere and Sincu carried the sobbing form of Saniteu into the tent. Cranire gasped and panted for breath. To gather words for what he had just saw. The girl collapsed but the little boy caught the baby. He kneeled beside her. Cranire dropped to his knees and then yelled. Laylpa had already deserted them to gather help. She returned with groups upon groups of healers all lifting kids off into the tents for emergency healing. For arjors and to take the little boy. They took the girl last upon her frantic request. "Takrt them first! Take the-'m fi-first!" She said quickly in her language. The kids all screamed and cried and yelled and sobbed. They clawed at the air to not be left alone. They had no parents.. All they had was each other.. And to bd even torn up like that.. Even for healing? Cranire shook his head. Ginkr ran to his aid upon hearing the news. "Ginkr.." He stuttered. "Yes?! What is it?!" "Dont split them up.. Dont split them up.. The kids.. The girl.. Dont spkit them upp,,,," he stammered and then.. He fainted. He awoke. He blinked and then sat up quickly. He wished he hadnt. His spine groaned and his bones protested. His limbs were on fire from his injuries. He blinked away the sleep and blurriness. He was in a tent. He was next to Saniteu. She sat holding her arm. It was bandaged. She clutched a photo of her and Mari. He winced at the pain. He looked around. On the other side of him was Inere. She had horrible claw marks down her arms and legs and part of her stomach was bleeding. Healers were working on her. Upon attempting to roll off the hard cot her stumbled. He glanced at Saniteu. It did not faze her. He stood up and limped over around. Sincu was rolling around in pain on her cot. Healers and helpers were clustered around her. He coughed and choked. He stumbled out of the tent. "Where are you going?" Demanded Laylpa. She was trying to br tough.. But failed. She choked up wigh tears and began to bawl. She held onto him. He held her. She evetually let him go and didnt question him. She just sat down because it hurt her legs to stand. He limped into the weapons tent and grabbed his staff. It helped him walk and he coughed up blood. He made it to the healers row. A huge row of kids who needed help just lay there and waited for healers to save them. He walked down the row. He stopped when he saw the girl. She opened her eyes when he collapsed next to her. "Youre very brave" he choked out. She didnt answer. Instead she sat up. The whip marks were all but healed up. They were only faded scars. Her hand was bandaged and so was her head. Her eyes were a fiery golden amber. And her hair was messy, but they were dreadlocks. It was shoulder length, her hair. And she wore new clean clothing.. Not the usual traditional garb she would wear. "The others... Theyre safe?" She asked him. With great difficulty because her mouth was still healing. He shrugged and stood up. "Ill find out. Wait here." She nodded and looked down. He stumbled off and found one of them. He was around five. He had bright red hair that was shaggy. His grey eyes stared off at nothing. His body was thrown into remission and he was bandaged up. He didnt wear much except for a big shirt and little shorts. He carried on and found another. A little girl around six. She had beautiful shiny black hair that was now matted and tangled. She had black obsidian eyes that looked everywhere tearily. She wore a bright yellow flower dress with a bow on it. Healers had already helped those two. He found another. A boy who looked nine. He had long brown hair that was tied up in a ponytail. His brown face was dirty from the dirt and blood and sweat. He had orange unusual eyes and wore a wool sweater with a dragon on it. His pants were red. He was sitting up and was self aware. He found another. A girl, age seven. Blonde hair that was cut short. She had faded healing bruises but nothing major. She had blue sky eyes and wore a sheet. Another. A boy age thirteen. He had big black eyes and black black hair. He wore a baggy dress shirt and baggy dress pants. Black face paint covered and smeared his eyelids and neck. There was one more. He looked up and down the row... Until eventually he spotted him. A chubby little boy around the age of eight. She had curly black hair and turquoise eyes. He wore a blanket and a board around his chest. He finally breathed. He didnt know how long since he had been relieved. He turned away and walked back to the girl. She looked back up at him. He nodded and she sighed in relief. She finally stood up. "Thankyou.. Im ready for the feast. As long as i have my kids." His heart warmed in ways he couldnt explain. He held her shoulder as they walked down the aisle. She beckoned for the boy with shaggy red hair to come and he staggered over to them in a hurry. She hugged him tightly and kissed the top of his head. They held hands. They both waved at the girl with obsidian eyes. She crawled over to them. They held her up as they walked. The nine boy spotted them and ran over to them he hugged them all and he held the girl with obsidian eyes. The sky eyed girl walked with them. The thirteen boy almost tripped in his hurry to hug them. He picked up the red haired boy and the seven girl. Finally the chubby boy walked over. He smiled a cute smile and hugged them all. Cranire teared up and staggered over to the overseer. "Cranire. Oh dreyts... " she hugged him. She let him go, and spotted all the kids. "Arjor Trane!" She bellowed. She ran over as quickly as she could. "Mamar?" "Wheelchair." She nodded quickly and wheeled a chair over. The nine boy kissed the little girl on the top of the head and sat her down in it. "Crutches. Iron braces. Leg. Arm. Thats all." She handed the crutches over to the red head. The iron braces went to the thirteen boy. The arm to the sky eyed girl and the leg to the nine. "Beautiful.. Youre all happy with what youre wearing?" They nodded. She smiled and finished fastening and screwing the metal and finally stepped back. "Great. Thanks Trane." She nodded and walked off. Cranire said see you to all of them and staffed it back to the tent where he kissed his boyfriend. ////////3456§2:&.92&2'sovlmfsoqkmcjdkdksmoskdmcmfkdodmcmkfkdmsokfmfkdoskcmfkeo "Sirius, why do you have to rush off without thinking properly? Dumbledore said, Harry would be fine.. Jame's son.. Hes going to be fine without us." Remus said trying to stop Sirius. Sirius scoffed, "Dumbledore knew I was an innocent man, Remus. He knew.. And he did nothing.. So that Harry would grow up to kill you know who. Raising him like a lamb to slaughter... But.. We are going to stop that from happening." "Ugh.. Alright.. I'll trust your judgement. But only is once. Lets hurry up. We will attract unwanted attention." "When have you ever, doubted my judgement?" Sirius asked with a smirk on his face. "Come on." Sirius and Remus apparated into the sleeping dormant Dursley's house. He heard loud snores coming from one room and nothing from the other. Remus pulled his wand out and tip toed into the loud room. He expected to see Harry being cuddled by the family and loved. But what he saw was a very very large man and a very very skinny woman holding a huge baby boy. Remus blinked, 'this is harry?' Sirius tapped his shoulder and Remus followed him out. He glanced back and with further investigation saw bright blonde hair. He blew out a sigh. "I knew that couldnt be him... He has black hair." "Jet black untidy hair, and green eyes, Remus, just like James..except with lilly's eyes." They entered the room and saw a sleeping baby boy. Sirius let a breath of relief out and went over to his side. "Odd, youd think he would have a crib.. But its just.." "A cardboard box. Is that napkins at the bottom?" "I think so... Merlin.." Remus gasped. At second examination he saw his ribs and little frame having trouble breathing. "How long has it been?" Remus asked. "Four years.." "Hes really really small for a five year old.." "Oh god are those bruises?" Sirius flared with anger. He took a step but was stopped by Remus. "You idiot. Dont blow our cover, we are going to get Harry out of here, you hear me? Dont think about revenge now." Sirius was furious but obeyed. He picked up Harry very gently and then he held him out to Sirius. Sirius's expression softened and changed to one of great affection at the little bundle. "My godson.." He whispered. "Our godson, Sirius." Remus corrected him. Sirius smirked at Remus and then kissed him. They pulled away and took Harry with them. Two years later. "Dad..?" Harry asked. He was seven now and going on eight. "Harry, Im Sirius. Okay? Sirius, and thats Remus." "Ok... Can you come and show me this spell again?" "Of course, Harry. Which one are you trying to do?" He asked him. "Oh, well... Im trying to get this to.. Float!" He said. "Well, lets see your stick." Harry handed him the small stick and then he shook his head. They both held it and Sirius showed him how to wave it. "Repeat after me. Wingardium..." "Wingardium.." "Leviosa.." "Wingardium leviosa.." At the sound of the spell it levitated powerfully. "Great job Harry! Keep practicing." I once thought i could break bonds just as fast as i built them But i guess i was wrong because it was a rose stem Thorns and beauty all in one Sometimes I think I can run Faster always gaining speed, just as my demons catch up to me Im breaking barriers and haunting ghosts These are the things that hurt the most and its tiring some of the time Im catching sleep or spitting lies right through my teeth Grey areas in my mind send me to space and through time Kings and queens rule the land of a horrible mime Moneys always scarce and friends always betray But at least some of my abusers stay You see Im always getting hit around for one thing or another Sometimes its because of my 'awful' mother My abuser always tells me Im bad if i go, im worse than scum if i think of the better And I guess thats why i stay true to the letter of dont dissapoint, always be there Even when the lady at the daycare stares Shes always askin me.. What my abuser and i do but its not that easy To repeat the mean things they say. Im talking hung on a rope like im strung out on dope Flying through clouds through the galaxy i cope Im always beggin to a god any if they hear me to grant me new hope but Im falling through lines ingrained into my grave i swear They shouldnt have called it a razor if im splitting the veins On new years when my abuser came home i could smell the twinge and sour smell of alcohol on their breath You see I guess its better than meth but Im not so sure alcohol is the alternative My abuser gave me a black eye on christmas and a bruised lip on valentines I guess somewhere along that line i called it quits I strung out the pieces and bits That werent already smashed and mamed. I remained to this day a survivor and Ill be damned if thats going to happen anymore. Seth ran a hand through his hair and sighed deeply. He was glad to be back in Malice, but he missed Kady deeply. "Seth, mate... Youre gonna see her again. So just in the mean time.. Focus on getting through this forest." "Yeah.. I guess.. I really love this world Justin. Its just... I wont see her for a long time.." Justin lay a hand on his shoulder and brought him in for a hug. "We narrowly avoided death back there and youre thinking about your girlfriend?" "She isnt my girl-" "Dont even want to know. My point is if youre so miserable... Then.. We can grab you a ticket and you can go and visit her. But you have to come back." "Its been three years... And my mind would get wiped." "No it wouldnt. Now that Tj is gone, kids who leave can keep their memories, cause it was all part of the comic." Seth thought of that for a moment before deciding., that yeah. He needed to see Kady. "You gonna come?" "Nah.. You two lovebirds can kiss it up all you want. Goodbyes arent my department." Black out days Adolesents

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