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takeme-totheworld · 4 months

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Aziraphale and Forgiveness, Pt. 3: You Think Too Much

This series is now complete! Here's where you can find the other parts.

Part 1 here. Part 2 here. Part 4 here.

I have been so gratified by the response to these so far! Thank you so much to everyone who has been reading and commenting and reblogging, I'm really happy that my thoughts about this are speaking to people.

Same disclaimers from before apply: this is all based on parallels to my personal experience with religion, my biblical and theological takes (when I have them) are probably sloppy, and I haven't read the GO book so this is all based solely on the show.

Aziraphale shows a level of emotional distress about Heaven's bullshit that we don't really see from the other angels. I wouldn't be surprised if some of this is because he is one of the main POV characters, and we eventually discover that he's not the only angel grappling with this stuff. But I do think he's fairly atypical. He's a demonstration of something often observed by people who leave super dogmatic religions: A system designed to keep people ignorant is extra hard on the ones who think too much.

It's a big part of what makes Aziraphale a misfit in Heaven. The archangels regularly respond to his ideas and concerns with annoyance, dismissiveness, and patronizing non-answers. When they come to Earth to confront him in season one, Uriel flat-out tells him, "You think too much." They are constantly communicating that they don't like this about him.

This aspect of Aziraphale isn't just because he's spent so much time on Earth, or with Crowley. It's clearly innate. We see it before the fall, when he tried to warn Crowley about asking questions. A different angel might have shrugged the whole conversation off and flown away, or unthinkingly blabbed about it to the wrong person later, or even deliberately snitched. But Aziraphale was already thinking independently enough of what he'd been taught to conclude (1) that this could get Crowley in trouble, and (2) that he didn't want that to happen because it wouldn't be deserved.

We also see it when he gives the sword away. Would it have occurred to most other angels to worry about Adam and Eve's survival? As they’ve been depicted so far, it seems like most of the angels—if they thought about it at all—would think, "That's not my business. It's up to God's whether they live or die." Not because they're necessarily all callous jerks, but because that's how they've been trained to (not) think about things. But Aziraphale thinks too much. That's always been who he is, he can't help it.

So what happens to a person who can't help thinking too much, who is caught up in a system that punishes that tendency? Often, you get someone who twists themself into mental and emotional knots to try to make sense of what they're experiencing.

Here’s are some things Aziraphale knows, or at least thinks he knows, in no particular order:

God created everything, is in charge of everything, and knows everything.

Aziraphale is an angel, and he works for Heaven, and Heaven’s sole purpose is to carry out God’s will.

God is good and Heaven are the good guys, so in addition to carrying out God's will his purpose is to be a force for good.

Sometimes angels who go against God’s will are kicked out and declared enemies. No one to whom this has happened to has ever come back. On the other hand, sometimes angels who go against God’s will get to go on being angels.

Sometimes humans behave wickedly and God harms or kills them as punishment. Other times, humans behave wickedly and God doesn’t do anything.

Sometimes humans behave righteously and God harms or kills them anyway (or lets Satan do it). This is apparently a test, but not all righteous people get tested like this.

Sometimes humans are sent to hell to be punished forever after their deaths. Sometimes they aren’t. This has something to do with how wicked they were during their lives, but Aziraphale isn't actually clear on how it works (see the Edinburgh minisode).

And while Good Omens hasn't delved deeply into this topic (yet), we know that both Jesus and the Second Coming are canonically real in this universe, which means the whole “Jesus died so that God could forgive people’s sins” thing is as well.* So, a few thousand years into Aziraphale's time living on Earth, God's son became a human, lived a life among humans, and then died, all for the express purpose of doing some kind of ineffable forgiveness miracle that would save more of the humans from Hell.

* I have no definite proof of this, Neil might decide to go totally off-script with the theology, but that wouldn't be in line with what he's done so far. This show has an established MO of examining existing religious stories and doctrines in order to deconstruct them. So, knowing season three is going to be about the Second Coming, I would honestly be very surprised if we didn't get some Gaiman and Pratchett style deconstruction of the crucifixion and all the forgiveness of sins stuff.

It's a complete mindfuck. He's serving a totally capricious system in which punishment vs. forgiveness is what everything hinges on, but only God knows how they are being applied, whether there's any rhyme or reason to it at all. The other angels seem content not to think about it, but Aziraphale is not most angels.

He's supposed to be protecting and guiding humanity, securing souls for Heaven, but he doesn't know exactly how the souls are judged. His best friend is a demon who is serving an eternal punishment for—something (asking questions? rebelling?)—and he has no idea if he will ever be pardoned, if such a thing even could happen or what it would take. He's committed numerous transgressions himself without ever falling, but that doesn't mean the next one won't be the thing that finally gets him cast out.

There are surely a lot of ways one could react to a situation like this. But for someone who is deeply inside the system and committed to it and whose overactive mind is working extremely hard to square all the confusion and fear of his situation with the idea that he's working for The Good Guys?

I think Aziraphale has come to live in constant fear of being Unforgiven, of one day transgressing so horribly that there's no possibility of redemption. And I think he is constantly projecting that fear onto everyone around him. It's why he lies his ass off to Heaven to cover his mistakes and broken rules. It's why he openly wishes, on multiple occasions, for Crowley to be granted forgiveness from God even though Crowley himself is visibly antagonistic to the idea. And it's why he feels compelled to forgive others even when it hurts to do so. (Like when he's just had a horrible fight with his best friend/the love of his life and he's overwrought and angry and not actually feeling forgiving at all, for example. Or when his memory-wiped ex-boss who once tried to have him executed suddenly shows up on his doorstop needing help.) Because forgiveness is such a powerful force in his world that withholding it feels like an unspeakably cruel thing to do, and he's supposed to be one of the good guys.

Once again I have written so many more words than I intended to, but I'm finally coming up on the end of this series! Part four will be the last part of this, where I look at specific instances of Aziraphale and forgiveness in more detail.

#good omens #good omens meta #good omens 2 spoilers #character analysis #aziraphale #religious indoctrination #religious trauma #forgiveness #i forgive you

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lgbtpopcult · 2 years

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40 Sapphic TV Shows You Have to Watch or You're NOT Gay*

We've already established I make the rules 😌

1. First Kill

2. The Haunting of Bly Manor

3. Harley Quinn animated series

4. Derry Girls

5. Yellowjackets

6. Skam Espana

7. Dickinson

8. Atypical

9. Killing Eve

10. Wheel of Time

11. The 100

12. Vigil, BBC

13. The Wilds

14. Orphan Black

15. Invasion

16. The Owl House

17. NCIS: Hawaii

18. Motherland fort Salem

19. The Outlaws

20. Everything sucks

21. Shera and the princesses of power

22. Legends of Tomorrow

23. Adventure Time Obsidian

24. True love or true lies season 2

25. Welcome to Eden

26. Fantasy Island

27. Orange is the new black

28. Skins

29. Runaways

30. Feria The Darkest Light

31. In my Skin

32. Station 19

33. Hightown

34. Run the Burbs

35. Kevin Can Fuck Himself

36. The Haunting of Hill House

37. Home Economics

38. Eldorado KaDeWe

39. The Sex Lives of College Girls

40. Astrid & Lilly Save the World

*This is a joke, you're the gayest person ever, I said so and I'm the ultimate authority on this matter. Case closed.

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deancasbigbang · 7 months

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Title: Solitudes

Author: ilovehowyouletmefall

Artist: sidewinder

Rating: Mature

Pairings: Dean Winchester/Castiel, mentions of past Dean/Cassie and Dean/Lisa

Length: 21400

Warnings: Canon typical alcoholism, alcohol withdrawal, vomiting, suicidal ideation, hallucinated major character death

Tags: angst with a happy ending, the mixtape, atypical formatting, season 12, canon divergent, open-ended

Posting Date: October 3, 2023

Summary: Dean and Castiel understand each other more than anyone else. They misunderstand each other more than anyone else as well. After Cas is nearly killed by Ramiel, Dean is coming very close to acknowledging that he wants something more from Cas than friendship. Cas, however, feels the weight of his responsibility very heavily. When Dean asks Cas to stick around longer, Cas says he needs to keep looking for Kelly, leaving Dean feeling dejected. But Cas agrees to help out on one more hunt before he leaves. Neither him nor Dean realize that the monster they're after can make their worst nightmares come true. Or: Dean thinks Cas is killed. Cas is there to witness the aftermath.

Excerpt: The address takes them into a residential area. It's clearly a well-off neighbourhood, large houses set far back from the street on carefully landscaped lots. Mature trees cast shade across the street, dappled light filtering through fresh spring leaves. It seems to Cas like a lonely place to live. He pulls up in front of a lot that has more trees than yard, puts the truck in park and cuts off the tape deck. Between the branches, at the end of a sweeping driveway, Cas can see a concrete block of a mansion, gray and hulking and crawling with vines. Closer to the road, a weathered “For Sale” sign tilts in the dirt. “Cozy,” Dean remarks. “Mm,” Cas hums. The tension that hung between himself and Dean during the drive settles over them again. The house looks dark and abandoned. Dean pulls his flask out of his pocket, and knocks back a shot of whiskey. He shakes the flask, checking how full it is. It must be empty because Dean scowls before tucking it away again. Castiel can be patient. He’s spent millenia watching the formation of galaxies. He can wait for Dean to break the silence between them. He can do that. “Are we going to talk?” Cas asks instead. Dean picks at the denim wearing thin across his knee, and mutters, “Sure, yeah, what d’you wanna talk about?” “You’re angry--” “I’m not--” “You are,” Cas insists. “And I don’t know what you want from me.” Dean looks sternly out the window, scanning the house, not looking at Cas. “I told you already.” Stay with me, Dean had said. Cas holds those words inside of himself. They make him feel warm all over, like stirring embers. He thinks about making his home with Dean, and it’s a shimmering, glowing idea. Having a place that’s his, theirs. He feels the tugging at his heart, the wanting. But then Cas thinks about how much he has to do before the world is safe, and about how much of the danger he’s responsible for, and how far away he is from redemption. Reality washes over him like grief. He imagines being sidelined, now, of all times. Cas shakes his head. “Dean…” he says gently, “don’t ask me for something I can’t give.” Reflected in the window, Castiel sees a crack in Dean’s frown, his eyes widening briefly before they go hard again. Dean shrugs. “Okay.” For a long time, the street is quiet around them. A nearby tree rustles with the movement of a squirrel. Further away, a woodpecker rat-tat-tats against a trunk. Then a scream pierces the air.

DCBB 2023 Posting Schedule

#dcbb 2023 #fic preview #2023 promo #deancas #destiel

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shopcat · 1 year

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HI. this is the steve harrington autism post. source: i have the steve harrington style autism that makes me autistic about him

to preface this i would like to say i am working off of personal like interpretation and thru the lens of my own experience :0... also this is long lol <3 so, tl;dr, here are the autistic traits or things that are caused by autism i believe steve showcases, (except.. do read if you like <3):

sensory issues -> wearing only ever the same style of clothes, adjusting/touching his hair, (potentially) eating certain foods

stimming -> walking in place to think, fiddling with small objects, spinning/flipping/throwing objects to keep himself focussed or entertained, listening to music

scripting -> repeating phrases/words aloud and practicing what he's going to say, repeating the "plan" aloud

routine -> strict hair routine with specific steps, was in routine sports with strict rules/timing and enjoys them otherwise, driving robin to school every day without even knowing she couldn't bc it was routine, working jobs that require mindless but engaging tasks including organisation

poor grasp of social cues, especially with girls, and saying the "wrong" thing at the wrong time (including the 6 little nuggets speech, "he ate dustin's cat", confessing to robin, etc)

other people feeling like they have to tell him things he's "missed" socially (dustin telling him he likes robin, eddie telling him he likes nancy)

likes to set/follow rules and is upset when people deviate from them (i.e. max wanting to leave in s4)

out of-the-box/atypical/lateral thinking

delayed processing of thoughts/concepts/complicated subjects especially in high-intensity scenarios

picking up on small details (like background sounds in large areas or recognising something) that other people don't pick up on

fixating on certain things (hair, clothes/shoes, sports, etc)

high pain tolerance/sensory dysregulation (shaking off concussions/consistent, continued ability to function while severely injured)

inability to conceptualise his OWN mortality/safety and engaging in at risk situations with little thought other than instinct + making impulsive choices

developmental differences/delays (literally crawling backwards)

poor grades in school/not getting into college

trouble regulating emotion

poor self esteem due to feeling worthless :(

i also have adhd so i also keep this in mind a little and obv at the end of the day this is just my own interpretation + autism is a spectrum :) NOW. i will go into detail >:)

SOOO i'm not sure if steve was deliberately coded as autistic but i DO think they intentionally in one way or another coded him with a developmental disability of some kind!! which i will talk about first!!

this is shown particularly in season 2 in a couple different instances and continues into season 3 at undercurrent ..

we've discussed this a little before but i also think this is why when people like to just describe him as genuinely "dumb" it like hurts people's feelings 😭 my feelings... and that's not intentional ofc but while it is a personal insecurity of the character himself that is being ironically picked at, positively or not, by those who love him in fandom, it's also evident of something happening under the surface that people may be unaware of imo

i think he display a out of-the-box, atypical or lateral way of thinking combined with delayed processing in a way that is very typical to neurodivergent behaviour!! and more...

in season 2 we get a really nice little look into his psychology about it when nancy is reading his college admission essay (that he presumably asked her to do) and he's sitting there SO nervous and full of doubt and worked up about it he's like. basically twitching 😭

he says "it's crap i know" and nancy's like no it's not! and he's like "ugh it's not good..." sooo stressed out.. and nancy says it just needs some reorganising, which is INTERESTING!!! someone who is insecure in his own skills and inability to get his thoughts across in a succinct way + has good, complex ideas that translate poorly when he tries to explain it out loud or in text + a host of insecurities pre-rooted and explicitly about his own intellectual "failings" all = a very neurodivergent read of Steve Vs School i think

also, maybe a tangent, but: in that essay itself nancy says he starts by using one of his basketball games as a metaphor for his life, then he confuses the metaphor by comparing it to the war his grandfather was in. nancy says she doesn't see how they're connected and he's like "um. it connects because we both won" (i actually think she's being very sweet in this scene!! idg when ppl say she's mean here)

ik this wasn't the show's intention and just extrapolation but i find it really cool + interesting that there IS a war of some kind that steve could talk about that HE fought in, there is a description of high stakes combat where it's him VS them and he is the only one who now has to make this high stakes, risky choice, instead of playing it safe like he always does that relates directly to his life as a metaphor and he DOES feel connected to his grandfather in this sense...

but he can't actually talk about that. so it's basketball. and it's a slightly clunky metaphor that makes it seem like, trite, like oh silly steve, basketball isn't WAR. the essay itself is actually really well-written and evocative!! but to me signifies this inability to directly translate what he's thinking, hence it needs a little "rearranging", or maybe it's a little "all over the place" even

(also, that he crumpled up the entire essay and dismissed it entirely and fell back on nihilistic thinking and "i'll just work for my dad i guess". he already had cast disbelief upon his own ability to thrive because he feels he's not good enough :( )

his failing grades, which ended in not getting into college, tech or otherwise, is a big part of his post-highschool arc i think. to me it also shows sympathy to a problem many young neurodivergent (in every which way, btw) people face, including myself, and is potentially a really almost kind portrayal of the capability of a person not being wrapped up in their intellectual or i guess SCHOLASTIC endeavours and "achievements", and that you can be successful and "useful" to others in different ways :0

to call him dumb and really mean it (both in and out of show -_-) after all this is a certain kind of disservice i guess? like okay i think a little jokey joke is fine and also absolutely RELATING is fine (and another extension of another one of my points which is basically just "he's just like me fr" can actually = "he's JUST like me... like For Real". he's dumb in the way i'm dumb and we're both not actually dumb) but let's all be cool okayyyy

beyond school, i think he displays SOO many behaviours both characteristically and even like in his physicality that build to this beautiful conclusion... i think steve is this guy who was served up to be an initially one dimensional being who proved himself again and again to have a multitude of complexities beneath the surface :). i think his literal entire character arc is adjacent to the autistic experience LOL... perhaps...

he showcases a certain need and comfort in routine in a variety of ways, like:

being interested in sports both watching recreationally (which have timed matches and he HAS to be there on time, too) and as the hobby itself. sports are a high-routine activity with strict rules and rituals, before, after and during, as well as the extra work you have to put in otherwise!!

ESPECIALLY something like swimming, which is all about certain timing (and an individual-based sport as opposed to the team-based basketball) which he took for years!! (and actually got his cpr verification for, which you absolutely don't need to just like. be on the swim team. but it would be the "right" way to do it LOL) (also idk how it worked in 1980s fictional indiana but you need your verification a year in advance to actually do anything with it where i live!! which means he did it FROM freshman year)

driving robin to school every day, and then presumably picking her up for work sometimes too, despite not even knowing she COULDN'T drive herself because he was so dedicated to this routine (and friendship :D <3)

his hair routine!! it's SO specific (four puffs EXACTLY!!! no more no less... and when it's DAMP not WET) and i am honestly of the mind it's actually far more complex of a routine he even makes it out to be .. and i am willing to bet the multi step experience of it all is sooo long and has to be just as specific too. also extra points for it being something he does that aids in his own self-image and would make him feel like he's putting himself together.? so to speak

i think, in a way, that he owns about 9 pairs of shoes and most of them are white sports shoes with a colour accent + he's been shown to wear the colour accent that matches his outfit more often than not. which i spose is a certain kind of. ritual or routine or something.

he also shows a whole host of sensory issues/complexities/...things!!

he wears the same style of clothes like CONSTANTLY. almost everything he owns is either a soft sweater or a polo shirt, plus the same style of jacket he cycles through, all of which are well-worn (despite him being like, rich) :) the exception is that colourblock denim vest (which i think is the exception for him too because he just wanted to look like marty mcfly. which is so autistic)

i.e. wearing something that you know is comfortable over and over that doesn't give you a poor sensory experience, and continuing to buy the same style of clothing because you know it's safe to do so because he FEELS comfortable. super autistic trait. beloved prep trait as well i also just think he doesn't actually care what he wears but whatever

he also sometimes favours tight clothes and sometimes looser/baggier ones (think one day the s4 blue/white polo and jeans, the next a sweater and loose chinos) which indicates to me possible different sensory needs in the day by day...

he also wears a lot of undershirts, including with the scoops ahoy uniform (which could've been to avoid a POOR sensory experience)

he adjusts/runs his fingers through his hair and makes sure it's in a nice state at an almost compulsive level but it's also like an afterthought kind of. it could also just be a sensory thing to want to retouch his hair and play with it and follow through with the prior routine of it Looking Good + a grounding technique for sure

along with that he stims a LOT, including the thing where he has to twirl or throw ANYTHING in his hands up to and including -> a lighter, the baseball bat MIDFIGHT, a torch, a phone MIDFIGHT, his ice cream scooper, keys, his sailor hat, a banana, a random ball he found... he's also very fiddly and tends to sort of be happy sitting quietly and doing something over and over like that (this is also a trait with adhd :) )

the jobs he worked are relatively low intensity despite customer interaction and had him working with his hands plus at FV there's a lot of sorting/organisation. also "not my TAPES man" because he already sorted them and now it's ruined 😭

you tend to see him taking a little moment for himself in the background of scenes a lot, sometimes with robin as well!! he kind of just wanders off and does his own thing but in the wake of the high emotion, high adrenaline various combats in-show it makes sense, even more so if he just needs a little moment to himself to unwind

he walks/paces to think!!!

the reason he and robin only even threw up in season 3 is a) the stimulating lights he noticed that then b) over-stimulated them

this one's a little less obvious but he listens to the same kind of music and listens to it LOUDLY when he's stressed 😭 he also doesn't turn it off even if he like, technically should like on the way to fight monsters. i think he just likes music a lot tbh but also very autistic to me (and also a reason why he and eddie would be friends and/or kiss on the mouth)

one of the biggest things that sounds off to me is his social interactions :0 he is hailed as this like, ladies man but almost near constantly plummets to the earth in insane social blunder which personally i love actually (and it extends beyond these situations too!!). all the hottest boys are autistic...

i know that this is to show him just like, losing his charm...? and that he peaked in highschool or something and i do love his patheticness but it's also sooo autism. one of the reasons i actually think he's gay (lol) is his compulsive need to try and "land" a social interaction with a woman, then fail, while also not "feeling the spark" with the women he DID land and failing to see why (like his date at the basketball game). he's constantly seeking companionship but it feels like it's just out of his reach and he doesn't get it... sigh... and that it's definitely in part bc he feel he can't relate to them because HE'S so different i think. for whatever reason. multiple.

in season 3 the ENTIRE you rule/you suck board is like a beautiful shrine to this... he's honestly so funny . but like constantly awkwardly flirting and somehow saying the wrong thing every time whilst also not getting that they're Not responding to him until they like, leave, which is like. a statistical unlikelihood to me of times this can happen without something else going on in his little brain. i also like that he "invented" a makeout point bc that opens up the ability to just go um. let's go to skull rock. and the person would be like oh okay yes i am going to makeout with steve harrington.

beyond just girls or failed flirting or whatever a lot of his interactions with the kids or his other friends ping to me as having trouble with social cues and some accidental bluntness!! a FAVOURITE being -> "dart ate a cat?" "no. what? no." "what are you talking about? he ate mews" "who's mews?" "it's dustin's cat" "STEVE..." 😭😭 i love him. also him suggesting he could work his charm on the dean of the school and nancy being like... not that kind of charm.

oh another good moment for this is in the epilogue to season 3 actually like he's trying so hard to show he's seen Some movies (but only remembers the significant/stand out details) and then when robin's like can you give us a moment he's just like. Why. and does this funny little head shake movement. and robin does the steve -_- and he backs away kubrick staring... beautiful scene

he also falls victim i think to saying the wrong thing at the wrong time which is a lot of the time not necessarily his like FAULT ofc but suggests further little issues or . unalignmentd with social interaction. the entire 6 little nuggets speech to nancy to me is one of these situations (and maybe the convo in the woods with her?? idk) where he's kind of just talking and digging a hole and the other person is sort of just sitting there. it's also shown with like "like the germans?"

ALSO, a lot of the time people end up coming to him specifically and sort of like... telling him what to do/how HE feels?? and i think he just sort of goes along with it. in season 3 dustin tells him he has a crush on robin until he kind of talks himself into it and then he accidentally crash-fails for a second time by confessing to her at a sort of insane time as well (not that i think he actually had any feelings for her!!). and in season 4 eddie does the SAME with nancy which is almost spectacular.

alsoo while i think he struggles with certain social cues i also think he's very emotionally intelligent and he picks up on people's feelings easily which i guess someone could say it seems to counter? other autistic traits (silly) but to me i think. autistic people are aware of PLENTY of social cues sometimes the cue is just stupid -_- and i can read other people's emotions for sure in fact i'm almost like hyper attuned to it i just don't know how to RESPOND to it a lot of the time. whereas steve picks up on dustin's nerves at the snow ball and reassures him accordingly (and so cutely..), then picks up on robin's emotions after his confession and near-immediately course corrects after her confession in order to make her laugh!!! he was also really good with picking up on nancy's feelings and knowing exactly what to do about it/using forethought about it (like idk holding her hand when they were having sex or something to ease her nerves but also noticing she was upset at the library) when they were together at least 🤔

there are also a number of other various things very dear to me that i have no where else to include. LIKE:

his high pain tolerance!!! he's able to shake off torture, multiple concussions, various beatings with little to almost NO actual repercussions. in s4 it was actually really interesting how he was feeling bad enough to almost faint after the bats but once he was patched up he was "fine", and acted like he was fine for... the rest of the entire show. he did a backflip. high pain tolerance is an offshoot of a sensory dysregulation!!

specifically a lack of filter and moments where he goes "too far" especially when he's struggling with an emotional dysregulation of sorts, like with dustin in s4 or even with jonathan s1, but also like. the dumb faces he was making behind his date's back.

"when i was a baby, i crawled backwards"!!! autistic children can have different development i.e. their early CHILDHOOD development that can present itself in a variety of ways!! atypical to the norm crawling/walking is one of them (also matches up with robin taking 6 months longer to walk than other babies which she Also said to nancy and i think this is significant of something and i don't know what. maybe it's just funny. also stobin soulmates ofc).

to me, being the guy who mid plan debrief is the one saying "so let me get this straight" AND that he's the one asking the necessary questions to get everyone's minds (and in the 4th wall sense the literal plot) moving suggests that he both feels the need to want clarification of like, plans/instructions and what the situation is so everyone is caught up and he didn't get it wrong, and that just speaking it aloud helps cement it in his mind (which is also scripting as well i believe). also his ability to ask the RIGHT "wrong" questions suggests out of-the-box thinking as well (i would say both of these are also an adhd trait!)

his friendship with robin is honestly a point for me LOL. robin is an example of a character i do believe IS intentionally absolutely autistic coded, especially in season 4 but also 3, and his bond with her seems to be a personal one based in trust in each other and their own similarities... in season 4 when they're lamenting their love lives and say they should "just combine" is so important to me.. ugh

he's very particular and possessive about his belongings in an almost pedantic way (c'mon man not my SCOOPER! and wipe your feet before you get in my CAR and honestly even that he refuses to let max drive it fullstop, a little bit)

he also ate. SO many bananas at scoops i think for a time being it ended up being a safe food which literally happened to me as well. a very small thing but i like it

he scripts!! ie he repeats words and phrases aloud as a form of stimulation and getting himself to think or practices what he's going to say before things so he's "scripting" it (his "i'm sorry wtf am i sorry for" speech before he runs into dustin in s2)

he gets along better people who, by majority, aren't in his peer group i.e. the kids!!! and even robin and nancy were a little younger! he is very genuinely friends with the kids and it is Very Genuinely so sweet, but particularly with dustin too i found it sooo... <3

he also shows like these moments of high-intensity like silly child-like qualities of (autistic) joy LIKE when he sees dustin in scoops and they have their little lightsaber fight (which they. had practiced and made beforehand) that is just so sweet to me...

he picks up on things that other people don't!!! as the Normal Guy in a group of people he typically ends up settling in that role BUT he's multiple times picked up on small details that other people don't or DIDN'T notice, which is a neurodivergent trait!! he recognised the song in the russian recording, recalled where it came from like. right after + was the only one who heard dustin in the upside down + other things like noticing when someone's missing from a room

i also think he may be prone to like. i guess sensory overload/emotional dysregulation when he reacts what i think is appropriately to these HUGE scary scenarios but everyone else is like chill out and therefore it's inappropriate to them that he's losing his mind about it. but as time passes and he gets used to it all it lessens for sure (most evident in season 1) but there are moments where he struggles to reign in his truest reactions to things i think LOL. he is also just very dramatic tbf ☝️

his other vague neuroticisms but specifically commenting when things aren't Correct or Right or Safe including complaining about the sterility of the needle he was being injected with mid TORTURE

when he defaults to sports metaphors bc that's the easiest thing he can relate to in s2. god

100% of autistic people i talk to about this all go OH YEAH he's so autistic. tbh i think autistic people relating to a character can be enough of a diagnosis to me. peer diagnosis...

i just think so :)

in conclusion...

#steve harrington #🍦#WARNING . this is like 3k #sts

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kataraslove · 3 months

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saw this on twitter so i decided to start a version on tumblr 💗

fan card - avatar the last airbender

fan since: 2010 (but officially had persistent brainrot since 2021 after the renaissance)

favourite character: katara!!!

least favourite character: ozai

favourite season: book 2

favourite episode: the waterbending master

favourite ship: kataang 💖

tagging others if they’d like to do their own version:

@chiefesskatara @survivalove @atypicality @flameohotwife @coyotelemon @akiizayoi4869 @transboyzuko @transaangg @autistic-katara @my-cabbages-gorl @ididgettomeetyou @yangvik @dukeofdelirium @leantailean @galacticmountains @khrystyav @northerngoshawk @toph-bi-fong @vibee2001 @coconutsaiyan @arcmagecallum and anyone else who would like to do it <3

#atla #avatar the last airbender

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errantemilia · 6 months

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Good Omens Fandom and Body-Type Representation (1/3): Lady Crowley

The Good Omens fandom is on fire after the release of Season 2 (we need to cope, yes). There is a lot to say, but let me focus on the visual representation of Aziraphale and Crowley as women. It has always been done, gender swap is a sort of internet rule, but in this case it's canon: in Season 1, during Warlock's childhood, Crowley is a woman; and Neil Gaiman himself revealed that among the flashbacks planned as possible for Season 2, there was "a 1960s American one with Crowley and Aziraphale female presenting." The fandom has gone wild, and the fan art of ineffable wives has multiplied.

So, let's talk about Crowley as a woman – I’ll call her Lady Crowley.

She. Is. Glorious. When artists draw Lady Crowley, they depict her as confident, bold, and beautiful, while retaining Crowley's physical features. Now, I'd like to draw attention to my own physical features. I have a hooked nose, a sharp jawline, I'm very tall and very thin, without curves. In short, I'm very David Tennant-ish (it even happened a couple of times that I was told I looked cartoonish). Rarely in my life have I seen myself as beautiful. Even more rarely have I seen women like me in cultural products who weren't the comic relief, or the villains. Certainly not the primary romantic interest of the story.

The portrayal of Lady Crowley expands the concept of "feminine beauty." Not only it reiterates a figure of a woman unconventionally or atypically beautiful – and the more you see her, the more you'll be inclined to represent women like her – but it surrounds her with coolness. It's the imaginary that feeds itself.

Sure, it's a small slice of imaginary. However, maybe the next time a tall, thin, big-nosed teenage girl gazes herself in the mirror, she won’t think, "I'm ugly, I look like a Scottish man," but rather, "I look like Lady Crowley, I'm awesome!”. For me, this would already be enough.

For the post about Aziraphale, aka Mrs Fell, see here.

#good omens meta #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #neil gaiman #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #ineffable wives #ineffable husbands #feminism #go2 #aziracrow #david tennant

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motleyfam · 1 year

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Consider: Tim having walking pneumonia. It starts in august, ragweed season, and so when he starts most days with a scratchy throat, sniffles, and some coughing, it’s easy enough to think “allergies.” At first the batfam is Suspicious(tm) bc they know better than to trust Tim at his word in all matters of self care. But there’s no fever, not at first, and while his symptoms don’t really go away, they also don’t get worse. Allergy meds do help his sniffling a bit so - okay! After a few weeks, Tim starts to feel more emotional. It’s so stupid, but he can’t stop himself from tearing up at the smallest compliment or any sign of conflict, even Jason’s affectionate teasing. He guesses he’s just sad right now, especially because everything is so draining. Brushing his teeth, doing homework, even helping out on comms (his FAVORITE) makes him feel all wilted and hollow inside. And then, the night sweats, leaving his sheets horribly damp and chilly. Sometimes it clings to him and soon he can’t seem to shake the cold. He can wear hoodies and blame it on the air conditioning inside, but it’s early September and even the baking heat off Gothams black tar makes him feel shivery. Tim gets snappy with everyone, because he’s so Tired, and so frustrated with being Tired, and for some reason, so Sad!!! One morning not long after, Jason and Dick and Bruce are all getting on each other’s case about, well, a case and Tim bursts into full on sobs at the table. Bruce only has to hold Tim for a moment to sense he’s warm. And then: the thermometer, the throat checking, the hair petting. Nothing horribly high but “uncomfortable enough to really throw you for a loop, huh bud?” If it gets any worse they’ll call Leslie. Meds, cuddles, repeat. But the next night, a slowly climbing fever. Not a spike, but a simmer. Over 8 hours it creeps higher even with meds and at 104 Bruce decides enough is enough (well, only right after Jason emphatically shouts Fuck This). Tim gets high fevers, sure, but something about this feels wrong. So around Leslie comes, with a barrage of tests and a “huh….oh. YUP.” And there it is: atypical pneumonia. Slow to progress, hard to notice. And poor Tim’s body just started to shut down after a while. All that coughing sure makes sense in retrospect. He’ll be fine with some antibiotics and A LOT of rest, as long as the fam can keep their guilt complex under control for 3 seconds around him. Just his luck, right?

Oh I am HIGH KEY considering

#I love this so much #you’ve got like all my favorite sickfic tropes rolled into one #slow progressing illnesses that are easy to write off at first!!#crying from feeling overwhelmed!!#fevers making people emotional!!#guilt complex Waynes!!#love love love this #and now would be a good time to mention #if ANYONE wants to write a fic inspired by one of my fics or set in the universe of one of my fics #you are MORE than welcome to do so #and I’ll be DELIGHTED to read it #so like OP you got some solid bones here if you wanna flesh this out…. 👀

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valenteal · 3 months

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I don’t know if I can even express how much I hate miraculous season 5? Like words just don’t exist to express the depth of my disappointment and anger at that cluster fuck? Like, when season 4 was coming out I wasn’t exactly happy with all the choices they were making but season 5 is just… gods it sucks so bad! I mean, Luka is easily my favorite character in the show but after Truth I was just like ??????????? the fuck you doing? It’s like Luka became popular with fans and for some reason they decided to just retcon the fuck outa him and Juleka? They’re twins now? No! Luka is the cool older brother! He has a bit more experience and maturity so he can understand Marinette but also understands when she’s being immature and ridiculous because that’s what happens at that age! Also great to see a non-nuclear family with a single mother and two kids with different fathers. The Coufaines are a much more positive representation of an atypical family dynamic than the Bourgeois family. Their all white and snobbish and damaged and they don’t love or support one another. Totally realistic and good to represent the struggles of different kinds of people, including those with privilege but it’s a pretty negative view and the Coufaines made sure kids watching the show could see how loving families can come in all shapes and sizes. Of course this was all before Chloé’s redemption arc was slashed to pieces.

And they sent Luka away!? And they started being open about hero identities like Alix? And suddenly Kagami’s mom is a villain? And Gabriel isn’t just insane with grief and power but it was all an evil plot from the start? What is even happening with anything?!?!?!?!?!?! Talk about losing the plot oh my fucking god!

Oh! And! They made Marichat canon but they took everything that made it great away?! Like, Marichat was great because neither of them were aware that they liked each other! They were able to be themselves and relax without trying to impress their crush. They both already saw one another as friends but couldn’t let the other know. It was sweet and fun and they were each other’s safe place and then they just took everything I hate about Adrinette and Ladynoir and projected it onto Marichat and UURRGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck Miraculous seasons 4 and 5. Fuck miracle queen too. As far as I’m concerned Miraculous got tragically cancelled after season 3 episode 23.

#my ramblings #rant post #mlb #miraculous ladybug #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #mlb season 5 spoilers #mlb spoilers #mlb salt #mlb season 4 #luka couffaine #chloe bourgeois #they deserved better

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raccoonfallsharder · 6 months

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One of the funny things to consider: in the MCU Rocket makes fat jokes about Thor and Quill (Quill wasn't even fat). Imagine Rocket letting his instincts take over on earth during winter season then realizing "oh... I get it now... i feel so warm and content... not hungry and angry like usual"

sweet nonnie ♡♡♡

let’s fuckin scrub those cheap, clumsy, poorly-written and atypical jokes from canon. the truth is the infinity war & endgame writers did the guardians SO fuckin dirty and my boy would never have made those jokes because (1) he would’ve understood too much about what thor was going through to mock him for anything right then and (2) he’s so insecure about his own body that he isn’t gonna risk holding anyone else’s up for scrutiny and (3) i doubt he’d have any real adherence to terran fatphobia any more than he understands weird terran ideas of gender binaries. too many bodies in space to have that kind of beauty norm

also comics rocket fucks so many different body types. all sizes are sexy to him

so now that we’ve cleared that greasy shit out of our brains, let’s focus on the important part, which is the fact that rocket has been eating more and more while he’s been staying with you this autumn. you’ve noticed that he’s finally been able to stop hitching up his loose pants, and on the rare occasions that he lets you hug him (grumpily, but you can tell he likes it ‘cause of the way his tail twitches) you realize you can no longer feel his ribs. he’s less sharp and pointy and you feel like his fur’s getting thicker too. healthier, more lustrous.

plus he’s in a better mood.

one night while you’re both eating snacks and watching movies on the couch, he looks down into his bowl of ice cream or popcorn or whatever and is like

“have i been actin’ weird lately?”

you frown. “what do you mean?”

he shrugs and turns his eyes back to the screen, takes another bit of whatever snacks you’ve been sharing. “i dunno. i feel—“ he hesitates ‘cause he’s never been good at examining his emotions. “i dunno,” he repeats. “i feel like i been bein’ less of a jackass, i guess.”

you snort. “i mean. i hate to call that weird, but… yeah, okay.”

“m’not as…” he trails off, groping for words. “hungry, anymore, either.” it doesn’t sound like he just means for food, but you doubt he wants to unpack that just yet.

“well,” you say slowly, “you have been eating more. maybe it’s all related.”

he looks down at the little paunch over his belly. “m’gaining weight.”

“does that… bother you?” you ask carefully, not knowing if any of his plentiful insecurities might revolve around his size.

he looks nonplussed. “nah. why would it?” he grins. “m’still just as fast and mean and smart. can still build a bomb in three seconds, beat drax an’ quill at poker without ‘em ever catching me cheating, and charm the hell outta you.”

“okay, okay.” you roll your eyes. “still just as modest, too.” you shrug. “anyway…” you’re not sure exactly how comfortable he is with the whole raccoon-thing yet, so you hedge your words. “lots of… people… put on an extra layer for the winter. to keep warm.”

“huh,” he says, like he’s intrigued. like the concept is completely alien (which in a way it is, of course). he looks down at his belly again, then up at the tv. “don’t think it’s that,” he decides after a moment.

you half-smile. “then what is it?”

he shrugs and doesn’t take his eyes off the screen. “think i might just be…” he hesitates. “…happy?”

#rfh asks #rocket raccoon headcanon #chonky baby #my best raccoon boy #rfh fluff

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chronic-claire-universe · 1 year

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Tokyo Revengers: Seasonal Flu

Hello my dust bunnies, today reading some medical notes about influence's vaccine I came up with this scenario in my head: tokyo revengers dads taking care of their sick babies, enjoy it!

Characters: Haruchiyo Sanzu, Izana Kurokawa, Rindou Haitani

Warnings: Fluff, Child Crying, Lot of Cuddles

Sanzu couldn't stand it, there was so much he was willing to do, he promised to, might kill even whoever decided to let his daughter cry, but what can a man do when his 3 years old daughter got the flu? You were currently out since you couldn't be absent from work anymore, working at home with Senju, Sanzu didn't mind taking care of Ayame until you were coming back. "Yeah yeah she's sleeping, I'm cooking her the sou-", a voice interrupts the call with you, turning around Sanzu finds his little girl, lucid blue eyes, pink starred pajama, blanket and her teddy bear on hand "Daddy" she mumbles wobbling towards him, tiny feet touching the cold floor make Sanzu wide his eyes "I'm calling you later, our princess woke up!" he says before saying you goodbye, "Princess, why are you up?" he says taking her up and cleaning her nose, "Daddy wasn’t in my room, I went looking for him" the h/c girl says gripping his hoodie, "Let's go you're going to eat something while daddy watches with you your favorite cartoon" her eyes wide, expression similar to her father's let Ayame shows her entire surprise, finally a smile on the sweet baby in a day full of pain for her little body.

“Y/N I’m not sure, Hiro seems to feel really bad, he’s coughing, crying and he has lucid eyes” Izana speaks on the phone pulling his long hair in exasperation, “Zana you have to calm down, no one is dead for a seasonal flu ok?” you say while rummaging through the documents in your office table, “Are you sure?” he says for the nth time, “Yeah Izana I’m sure” you reply raising your voice annoyed and continue “Let me speak with Hiro” and so the ex gangster walk with the softest walk towards the kid who’s looking tiredly to his dad, Hiro isn’t your biological son but for Izana it’s like he raised the kid since he was an infant, that’s why with the most atypical calmness he comes closer to the toddler and give him the phone “Hey kid it’s your mama, she wants to know how you feel” he says with a smile caressing his forehead to feel it burning.

“Ma-mama” your son says sniffing a bit, “Hey baby, mama has something important to ask you” you say with a smile while hearing your husband grumble and your son nods with a smile looking at his father and letting him cuddle on his lap, “Do you want this bad virus to go away right?” you ask, waiting for your toddler’s reply and he nods “MH - YES MAMA!” He says almost convincing himself that he will feel better if he shouts it, “Then would you eat the green soup that helps feeling better and all your veggies to feel better?” you are tricking your son who gasps at your question, “No mama, no veggies please!”, Izana laughs hearing that your son he’s making a fuss over a simple cold and that’s why your husband takes the phone and ruffle your son’s hair, “Go to bed, you eat your veggies later” and before leaving his bedroom he looks at his son with a smile only meant for your small family. “You were right, love, you’re a great mother” he says making you giggle, “Maybe it’s time we think of giving Hiro a sister” he says with a smirk and you can only laugh “Maybe, but I already have 2 babies to take care of at home”.

“I’m not going to tell you another time” Rindou warns his son as soon as try to dodge the spoon he’s trying to give him for half an hour, “NO - NOO DADDY!” he shouts, dodging the spoon with the bitter medicine. Rindou sighs and with a scowl he looks at his smaller copy who suddenly sneeze on his hoodie, this wasn’t supposed to be the life Rindou imagined and with a look of disgust he cleans his hoodie, “Sayuri I’m not going to tell you again you take the medicine or I’m going to throw all your toys” he says trying to see if this threat works, “Mommy will buy them for me even if you do it, and she will scold you” he says with a smirk similar to his uncle Ran, “Do what the f- do whatever you want” and he stands up to go out of his son’s room huffing in disappointment, “Look at daddy struggling” Ran says teasing his brother, “Shut up!” he says a bit aggressively, frustrated from his son’s tantrum.

“Now you know how it’s raising a kid” he says patting Rindou and helping preparing the breakfast for Sayuri, “I was a good kid, y/n spoils him and he doesn’t listen to me” Rindou says with a huff, “It’s not y/n, he’s just a kid, look” Ran says taking the syrup and putting it into his niece favorite glass and mix it with water, “How do you think I did with you?” he says before turning and hearing little feet padding on the floor, “Heyyy buddy look Uncle Rannie is here!” Ran shouts seeing a mop of blond hair sneezing and dirtying all around his pajama and blanket, “Uncle Rannie! Give me food!” he says and Ran smirking says “Cmon why don’t you ask your dad?” he says taking his son on his lap and cleaning his red nose, “Daddy doesn’t sing me the song” he says lowering his gaze “Cmon baby that was the problem? You should have asked me” Rindou says, taking his son and giving him the medicine before engulfing him in a warm hug.

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#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers fluff #haruchiyo sanzu #izana kurokawa #rindou haitani #tokyo revengerd dads #sanzu fluff #izana fluff #rindou fluff #tok rev haitani #tok rev izana #tok rev sanzu

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