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#borderline tag
lamictaltears · 1 year
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liability by lorde.
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thequietborderline · 2 years
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today's mood, 06/09/2022.
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szaskn · 1 year
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thisuserisgonesorry · 10 months
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when you're having a hard time and trying to reach out for support and suddenly you're a child again hearing "i'll give you something to cry about"
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brokenbxnny · 1 year
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I get really lonely sometimes. I have a lot of friends and I know they care about me, but I know I’m not anybody’s favourite person. I’m not close with anyone, I’m not anyone’s first choice. Im kinda just the backup friend who people could probably live without tbh.
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profoundlypained · 2 years
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Sometimes it's really hard to be soft and patient and kind when you're overstimulated and it makes you feel exceedingly violent.
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cvsgirl · 2 years
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how do i explain to someone that i don't regret anything i've ever done and that i regret everything i've ever experienced, at the same time, constantly
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cryying · 2 years
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I am waiting for the day when I am happy that I did not die when I wanted to. I wait for the moment when all the pain makes sense and all the scars have been worth it
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finelineborderline · 2 years
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when you’re so perceptive about the way others interact with you, it makes you hyper focus on every element of yourself in relation to them. whether you were too loud or too angry or too rude or too attentive to them or too *anything*, having borderline personality disorder means you are constantly paying too much attention to how others speak with you, how their body language presents itself, and even in the absence of those things, your brain will come up with a storyline anyway. i don’t have to see someone physically to imagine them rolling their eyes in disgust when they see my name light up their screen, or picture their pity and imagine themselves wishing they had the guts to just unfollow me. i don’t have to be in the same room as my friend to think they’re just working up the courage to tell me to fuck all the way off. i don’t have to see any of it to come up with imaginary scenarios.
having BPD means being on high alert, constantly, with everything and everyone, and it's perpetually exhausting. i'm sure many others can relate, but i wish i had the ability to just stop caring so deeply about so many things, but i can't, and it's almost like the opposite happens when i try to care less. i end up caring more. and it's just beyond draining, beyond tiring.
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frank-ieros-bitxh · 1 year
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what it's like having an fp i think my ideal world would be just me and them. because that way nothing would change for me, but they'd know what it feels like. the closest literary comparison i could possibly make is the way basil feels about dorian in The Picture Of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, except this isn't romantic. is this romantic? i don't believe so, it transgresses that. i don't know if there's a word to describe how i feel about them, besides wholeheartedly. the way basil feels that he is entirely dominated by the existence of dorian, and that he is nothing if not fully and purely infatuated with him. i genuinely believe that there's not a thing they could ask of me that i wouldn't give them, or at the very least kill myself in an attempts to do so. i could be the most philosophically and academically inclined person in a room until they enter it, because then from that point forward i'm a child, desperate for the attention and affection i never received. i've carefully chosen the term "platonic intimacy" to describe this, the crave for such delicate interactions that i deny from everyone else. it doesn't matter who you are, if you try to hug me, or hold my hand, or any other form of gentle physical touch i will recoil, denying you the interaction. unless, that is, you're them. i will actively refuse verbal and physical comfort from anyone else under the sun, because i cannot, for even a second, let my guard down to accept said comfort. what if, in that second when my defenses are down, they recognize my vulnerability and attempt to cause me harm? that's why i refuse to be weak, unless it's with them. they wouldn't hurt me, and if they did, i deserve it and would feel the overwhelming need to end my life. i genuinely believe they wouldn't hurt me on purpose, but then again there's times their tone of voice changes, or their posture or their mood and it feels like my world is crashing down around me. what's wrong, darling? is it something i said? or maybe you don't like the way i said it? or is it the way i chose to do my makeup or my hair or dress today? please tell me what's upsetting you about me, so i can change it immediately so you'll love me more. please, just love me. a simple "love u" text instead of "i love you" feels like tiny daggers being injected into my bloodstream, making their way to my heart. i'd die for you, i'd live for you, my whole existence revolves around you, anything to make it not revolve around myself. no matter how hard i try to change it, my entire day is determined on how we interact. i could he having a great day, nothing bringing me down, but when i see you, you're distant and upset. you matter more to me than i do, please, just let me help. i'll make it better, i promise.
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lamictaltears · 1 year
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"I'm Okay Though" by Sara Kays
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thequietborderline · 1 year
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jar of hearts by christina perri
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bunnieborderline · 2 years
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thisuserisgonesorry · 8 months
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when you miss them but you know that if they missed you, they'd reach out but instead they go weeks without talking to you :3c
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borderlinepdfeels · 2 years
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hopefulqueer · 2 months
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just started re-writing My Novel that i haven't touched in almost 5 years and which i first started almost 10 years ago. i've drastically changed several things about the story, but i've written a couple of lines that are so these characters that my chest physically hurt. i've missed them like friends.
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