#can our love survive

[bowie-boy]

I know you guys feel this way too

#like 😭 #it’s so beautiful how we’ve allowed our love for them to create hundreds of thousands of worlds where they survive and are allowed happiness #that’s so beautiful #i wish everyone was allowed that privilege #to be seen by others as a person that can achieve the best possible version of their life #god #jack’s posts #spn #destiel #deancas #supernatural #Nov 5 #Nov 5th #November 5 #November 5th

[thebrainrotsreal]

EVIL MARK, EVIL MARK, EVIL MARK!!! I want to be coherent about this season but please picture me foaming at the mouth and running on the walls. S2 being what if Mark's just like his Dad? Insanity. I love this show. Anyways, AU where an Evil!Mark tries to make Our!Mark worse, and Our!Mark tries to make the other better. Something something confronting your idea of the worst version of oneself. Plus, tweaked black and yellow costume because I saw it and immediately went murder hornet lookin' ass and knew I had to draw it. Evil ass Mark. Horrible. I think he should be dragged kicking and screaming into redemption.

#mark and the fact he is fighting for this fucking life to avoid the Many Bad Endings???? im pacing. getting out the red string. #when the season is about who you are and what you could become. when trying to be good is an active choice and a struggle. #RAHHHHHHHHHHH #chewing on the bars of my enclosure...when every mark is evil OUR mark is the outlier. the exception. the OTHER. RAHHHH #dog poetry being mark poetry because how often can you kick a dog before it starts snarling before you raise your hand? #how often can you beat it before it rips into you without mercy? when it bites not at your hand but at your neck? #when does violence for survival and violence for vengeance start and end? when your opponent is down and you keep drawing blood? #circling and pacing and losing my mind over this btw if you care #anyways self vs self gets me going crazy. did you know i loved the end of atsv? because it shows. #i think o!mark would lose his fucking mind at what evil wasp looking mark has done + this mf wasp would LOATHE mark's kindness #they both see the other as the WORST version of themselves and they can't stand it. They can't shatter the mirror but they think they can-- #--change the reflection. #evil mark seeing mark and seeing what he USED to be #mark seeing what he COULD be #CAN U SEE THE VISION?????? #digital art #invincible rotating in my mind #invincible fanart #fanart #mark my beloved #mark grayson fanart #mark grayson #invincible s2 #invincible show #mark like hello this is my secret twin and he is NOTHING like me hahahaha anyways wanna debate about having mORALS and LIFE #mark grayson vs the urge not to accept every responsibility as his own #he's batman coded that way #ok im done yapping #if this happened in the comics in any way shape or form dont tell me JACK SHIT or i will PUMMEL YOU with my SHOES

[uncanny-tranny]

And another thing that gets me about the human condition is how we weren't even meant to survive this world alone - humans with humans. We chose to trust certain animals, to nourish them, to be symbiotic with them, to love them like we love ourselves. I think a lot of people talk about how selfish it is for humans to take advantage of animals, but I think that's too simplistic. It's closer to friendship - if you do not foster the relationship, then it simply won't go anywhere, and I think the implication that animals can't ever know anything for themselves, for their survival, is also human-centric and selfish (selfishness not inherently being a bad thing).

It's just nice to know that we want to be around people - we want to be around comfort and security and safety so much that we now have animals by our side. Every time I cuddle with my cat, I think that we weren't meant to survive this world alone; she is shaped to fit in my chest, and my arms were made to wrap around her.

#positivity #and i know many people are like 'but we domesticated animals for what they could do for us 😞' and that's not the full picture... #...YES we fostered certain relationships with animals because they are skilled and they are qualified so to speak... #...but we also must prove ourselves in order to keep our end of the deal. would an animal really WANT to do their work if they... #...weren't taken care of? ESPECIALLY if they're stubborn in nature? #it just seems human-centric to think that all animals are at the mercy of us and could NEVER think or feel #and even then!!! we won't ever KNOW because they have different thoughts and feelings and perspectives we won't KNOW ABOUT #maybe we should just bask in the company and love that animals give us without worrying about committing Awful Heinous Sins #YOU ARE A PART OF NATURE. YOU ARE ALSO AN AMIMAL. YOU CAN SURVIVE WITH OTHER ANIMALS #when you take the time and care to learn about animals you can even relate and feel for them and understand a little better #i just love that humans tend to pack bond so intensely that it doesn't just apply to other people #our instinct to love and care is a good thing. our pack bonding will help us survive. #to live is to be 'selfish'. it is you IMPERATIVE to be selfish

[manygreetingsfriend]

i’m sooooooo normal about the god of war series. so incredibly normal i liked it a normal amount and would be so chill talking about it. don’t worry about the sign

#god of war #i’m so so so so so normal about it it’s so whatever it’s so haha you know #something something when it comes to yourself you’ll let yourself drown before you change. you’ll die before you change who you’ve become #to survive this long #up to and until it affects the ones you’ve come to love in this life you’ve made for yourself and you suddenly have no choice but to change #it’s fine it’s ok it’s chill. everyone does this. #it’s becoming a parent and loving your child so much you HAVE to change. you HAVE to be better #we MUST be better. than they were. #who’s they. our parents. the gods that come before us. yes. #i’m screaming i’m crying i’m wasting away im disintegrating. there’s no coming back there no return #you are on your knees. you are gripping your son’s shoulders like they’re the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth. #you are struggling with who you are and who you want to become. you are promising to be better. #i’m so normal about parent(al figures) taking responsibility for their actions and choosing to do better #i’m not high enough to really express what’s going on here. can you feel it? can you fucking feel it? #this series has destroyed me. #dad of boy. dad(s) of boy. i will never be the same (affectionate) #can’t remember the last time i finished a series and went ‘oh well i’ve GOT to play it again Now That I Know’ #AND I HAVENT EVEN TALKED ABOUT THE BROTHER HULDRA!!!!!!!!! #sindri’s face. has not left my memory #i’m dying scoob #gow #gowr

[yellowsubiesdance]

i think i’ve learned a lot when it comes to not applying my own values to the media i consume

for my script analysis class yesterday, we discussed two gentleman from verona, and nearly every classmate of mine was up in arms about how sexist the story is.

and i'm not saying it's not, or that it's not infuriating to read. but i'm also not putting my energy into getting upset about something written 500 or so years ago. and i'm not about to put my own beliefs onto these characters that are not me. i'm going to let their choices speak for themselves, and interpret it in the context of the story.

all that said, this now brings me to the point of alastor in episode 5, and how viscerally people are responding to it. those of you up in arms about the choices he’s making, and the violent threat he gave husk, you’re missing the entire point of his character, of this place they’re in, of the story being told. he’s an overlord, and he became an overlord by killing much bigger overlords and broadcasting their deaths over the radio.

HE IS NOT A GOOD PERSON.

if you started this show with the belief that every character working the hotel is a good person, you’re in the wrong place. watch the good place if you’re looking for a good wholesome story about getting dead sinners into heaven, because that’s not what this show is about.

you’re more than welcome to hate him after seeing the way he exerted power over a being whose soul he owns, but you’re doing the media you’re watching a disservice by writing it off so quickly. if you don’t like to be uncomfortable watching media, watch something else. this is an uncomfortable show, it handles uncomfortable topics, and it’s going to be an uncomfortable ride, and if you’re not up for something like that, then you should take a break from it and pick up something else. you don’t have to get online and defend your own ideals while you watch a show that goes against your ideals.

#hazbin hotel spoilers #that’s not even touching on the fact that husk was an overlord too #he also owned souls that he used as currency to supply his gambling addiction #he’s also not a good person!! #the majority of these characters are in hell for a reason: they’re not good people #i quite frankly love the way this show blurs the lines between good and evil #our heroes are sinners and overlords and demons. while the enemies are angels. but that doesn’t mean our heroes are good people. #you HAAAVE to come to terms with that!! you have to stop seeing the world in black and white or you’re not going to survive this world #if you’re upset because alastor was cruel to husk fine! be upset! but explore why you’re taking yourself out of that world. #in this world sinners own other people. there’s no ifs ands or buts #‘oh alastor is a poc why would he own people’ he was a serial killer when he was alive do you really think you can apply your values to that #(and this is me speaking as a poc. specifically a mixed race poc.) #i cannot speak to who vivzie is as a person. but i’m interested in the message she’s writing and thus far i’m finding it compelling #it’s a similar story as the good place but it’s going the distance to explore even worse people than those in the good place #i don’t think it’s responsible to write something off just because unsavory things happen in it. #and she’s giving us so many different types of representation that don’t involve race (although we’re also getting a lot of hispanic rep) #just like cool your jets and maybe process some of the anger you’re feeling. and maybe nothing will change. #but if you act. instead of react. if you understand why you’re feeling some type of way and then make a choice. #that’s so much stronger and more responsible than reacting and not thinking anything through #hazbin hotel #alastor #husk #hazbin alastor #hazbin husk #anyway let me get off my soapbox #long post

[leatherbookmark]

our flag means death S2E3: the innkeeper

#our flag means death #ofmd spoilers #ofmd s2 spoilers #shrimp gifs #it was just a very pretty scene i think #i'm laughing because i played around with curves -- as you do -- but then i had to manually bring the brightness down and make everything #more blue again because it's just better that way lol #god i'm having... so many little marbles bouncing around my head like #this post is already tagged with all the spoiler tags i think i can talk in here #the way it started i had No Inkling At All that this would be this kind of setting. so i didn't pay attention to the surroundings or all th #stuff. hell i could barely hear what they're saying because all my fancy schmancy english skills fall apart in the face of your normal soun #mixing. I MISSED THAT IZ AND ED SAID “LOVE” LIKE HELLO #but. but anyway. but. but once it was revealed that This Is All In Ed's Head. that hornigold is ed and everything is ed. man. god. #it's cold and wet and dark (ed likes warmth). ed was washed up on the shore with his face full of sand but THEN he got rescued by someone #who he hated and associated with all the pain and violence AND who then force-fed him soup so he could get better. who had pretty pieces of #glass hanging from his tent (there's no sun but the decoration itself is a promise of a pretty sighs when the rays of the sun hit #just right--) AND you can't forget the sandals. and the play-acting and aoughhhh EEEDDDDDDDD god he's so good HE'S SO GOOD #i dont think i should touch the delightful revenge scenes because they're dark as fuck and idk if the files i have are hq enough #to survive the becurvening. BUT. ed my love!!! i hope this is not where your insanities end

[arospecsyourblockdudes]

more historical fiction needs to be set in ww1. bonus points if you fag it up

#every time i check historical fiction books its like the year: 1943 and like OK geez #either ww2 era or like the 60s or 20s or some shit #can i PLEASE get a story set in the goddamn trenches of verdun thats mean and nasty about killing characters #sorry theres no easy “bad side” in that war ?? make the bad side the governments cuz thats what it was #my god. can i read about our protag watching some guy die horrifically from a gas attack #and then fuck one of the other soldiers to find any form of intimacy+comfort #read one book set in ww1 but it focused mainly on the russian revolution. still a good one i love u martha hall kelly #but they made this one random dude enlist in the air force and i was SURE he was dead walking corpse u know #but he SURVIVED i was mad. kill this bitch #pilots at a certain point in the war i wanna say 15-16 had such short life expectancies KILL HIM !!!!! #anyway if u have recommendations of queer ass ww1 books i will take them please and thank u #dont even have to be queer just want some all quiet on the western front type shit

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #140

FRIDAY has news alerts set up for Spider-Man. This doesn't change during the blip, even though the kid is gone

One day, there's breaking news that Spider-Man is standing on the roof of some extremely tall building. This is during the blip, and no one has seen him in years.

No one has seen Iron Man either, which is why it's so crazy that he's suddenly shooting through the sky

When Tony arrives, he discovers that in fact his kid has NOT spontaneously un-dusted. It's actually just a civilian dressed as Spider-Man. It becomes clear the person was planning to commit suicide. The costume was for courage.

Even with his heart breaking from the false alarm, Tony talks the person down. He says that Spider-Man, too, lost almost his entire family. That he was still the best person Tony knew. At some point, when the person mentions losing a child in the blip, Tony says he understands how they feel.

Once the person has agreed not to jump and calmed down, they realize how unusual the situation is, remembering suddenly that Tony Stark hasn't been seen in public since the snap. They ask Tony, mostly just wondering out loud: why now?

Tony's eyes go to the suit for just long enough for the person to realize. They recall what he'd said about losing a child, and they realize with horror the emotional hell they just unleashed on Iron Man

When they start to stumble out an apology, though, Tony waves them off. He says that Spider-Man would love the idea that he was still helping people, even without being there. And he would love that in some way he'd gotten Tony back out there and helping people too.

Before they part ways, Tony asks the person to consider the suit a symbol of the courage to keep going, not to give up

The person responds, "you too."

#irondad fic ideas #cw: suicide mention #irondad and spiderson #iron dad and spider son #this is canon complicit which distresses me #like. i'm posting this against my will #as much as i want someone to write this and have tony survive and tell peter all about this event safely at home #i'm also like #@fluencca our canon complicit overlord: hurt me #fluencca the patron saint of causing me canon complicit psychic damage #irondad fic idea #tony stark #peter parker #iron man #spider-man #queueueueue #weekly reminder that i love you all but am too busy to be human :) #fic ideas still postponed but you can send asks if you want i just won't see them for a while #see announcements

[subtle-as-an-earthquake]

spending my thursday night arguing with an irl friend about milex and specifically about the question of who'd usually top or bottom in that relationship, and boyyy she is so wrong, like wow 😭 i'm *this* close to compiling a powerpoint presentation for the sole purpose of showing her just how wrong she is

#no but i love her so much #i truly do #she's a massive arctic monkeys fan too even though she's not in fandom #but she's not a shipper so she doesn't knowwwww #she doesn't know how wrong she is lord help her #let's hope our friendship survives this bc she's coming to dublin with me lmao #no i'm kidding it's all fine #she's just very wrong but that's ok #it's FINE i can deal with this #milex #minnie talks

[luck-of-the-drawings]

TRAINING ARC: START!! BOTHER YOUR GUARDIAN AND EXHIBIT ISSUES. NOW SOLVE THOSE ISSUES BY BOTHERING GUARDIANS. I HAVE FULL FAITH IN OUR HEROS!

#jrwi fanart #jrwi prime defenders #jrwi pd spoilers #jrwi show #cw blood #okayokay tryin out this queue thing for the first time despite usin this webbed site since 2013. if all goes accordin to plan this should #post at noon tomorrow. in the mEANT TIME CAN I TAAALLK ABOUT THIS EPISODE PRETTY PLESe??? THIS SHOW IS SO FUCKIN FUNNY... #SO MANY BITS I WISH I COULDVE DRAWN.. THIS WHOLE SHOW IS SUCH A PERFECT CARTOON IN MY BRRAAIAIINN. VYNS whole deal with talkin to himself #wasnt his dealio like. he had like NO complications for most o the show before this. wats that one gravity falls scene with soos goin like #i knew it. im literally the perfect man. and then he raises his arms for a heavenly choir and a dove lands on him. thats vyncent. BUT NOOW #MY BOY COMPLICATED!!! THE OVERTHINKING THING IS SO FUCKIN GOOD AND FUNNY. MY BABY BOY CAN DO ANYTHING. HES SO GOOD AT BREAKING ROCKS #Oh and this doodle page also includes the winebago shenanigens after reuniting with tide. the DARTS remember the darts #remember when tide actually snapped at william for driving like a FOOL!!! LOVE THAT SO MUCH. i gotta draw tide more aauuughghghuhh #ohh my GOODD WILLIAMS BEEF WITH THE RABBIT N THE BOAR WAS SO FUNNY... THESE CHARACTERS ARE ALL SOO FLAWED #WILLIAM IS SUCH A LITTLE ASSHOLEE. VYNCENT IS STUBBORN BEYOND BELIEF AND REASON. DAKOTA IS PERFECT HES A LIL DUMB BUT HES SO SWEET AND KIND #AND OH MY GOD ONE MORE THING CAN I JUST SAY. bizly is such a magnifiscent dm. i remember sayin months ago that #he finds ways to stack impossible odds against our heroes while still leaving room for them to succeed. the pd hasnt taken a single W but! #theyre surviving!! theyre keeping it together! from meat planets to cartoons to other dimensions to fighting the GODS!!! pd is genuinely #such a delight to listen to. a comedy and a tragedy. a story of ragtag heroes doing their best to do good despite their own failings.

[lorephobic]

what i thought the catton players would be versus what it actually is

#haha slash jay we are joking 😁😁😁 #rpf is morally reprehensible and those men are definitely NOT in love !!!!! #honestly genuinely tho so happy for this fucked up little playground ive created #where we can all say the most depraved things are there are absolutely zero repercussions #oh u think saltburn fans are vapid and delusional in the tumblr tag?? u would not survive a second in our private group chats

[plounce]

tomte, my wol, who really is that nice. (words from "laika" by patti white)

#chirps #bird in the hand #tomte peregrin #waghhhh im so out of practice with non-catcrumb digital art... #or just non-catcrumb art in general. oh how we get hoisted by our own petards #anyway. i really love her. she is my angel. #she's just genuinely a very kind & caring & generous & patient person who can deal with all the troubles in the world for her loved ones #and doesn't think of herself much. there's not a cynical bone in her body. #everybody but her is crying as they put her in a rocketship they don't know if she'll survive #she knows she is nigh indestructible and unfortunately she's not wrong.

[cherrysodabear]

✨️Fazbear photobooth 4!✨️

#fnaf #five nights at freddys #fivenightsatfreddysfanart #michael afton #jeremy fitzgerald #jeremike #fnaf fanart #my art #cherrysodabear #AND WE END OFF THIS LIL SERIES WITH OUR LOVELY COUPLE #this one i was definitely looking forward to tbh #i just love the pairing sm 😭❤️ #ALSO yall get a better look of how jeremys head looks under the hat #literally a chunk of his head is altered due to the odd healing from the remnant #and yes this is my own headcanon on how he was able to survive #cause like if Michael can survive due to the remnants basically resurrecting him then like some had to of helped jeremy out

[chimaeraonwards]

DownDectector x AO3

To celebrate AO3 coming back online, here is the fic I wrote to cope with the Great AO3 Shutdown.

_____

“DownDetector, what is your emergency?” 

Sharp, shallow breaths come through their headset. A panic attack, unfortunately not that uncommon in Emergency Website Shutdown Reporting.  

“Hi, can you hear me? Take deep breaths, slowly,” Dow continues, their training kicking in immediately. When the caller sounds a little deeper, longer. “How can I help you?” 

A small frantic voice rushes out, “I was on Ao3 reading a 400k hurt/comfort fic, and then, they were finally going to make up after all the angst, and now”. A sob wreaks through the other end of the line. “It's gone, it's all gone. Ao3 is down.”   

A shudder pierces through their heart. No, wait, focus on the call - you’re on the job damn it. 

Automatically DownDetector replies, “Thank you for your report. Not to worry, sometimes servers go down but Ao3 usually bounces back in at most, a few hours.” Down glances at the screen. Usually Arch messages Dow quickly with an update, they know how much Dow worries. 

“I just feel like something is different this time. It feels wrong.”

Oh right, the call. Dow quickly types through the report in front of them. “I understand how alarming this may be. Please check Ao3’s official Twitter account for any updates. Can I have your location to complete this report?”   

Dow goes through the motions but there is a blaring alarm going off in their mind. 

Ao3 is down. 

Ao3 is down.

Ao3 is down.

Ao3 is down.

Ao3 

is 

down.

A glance at the screen shows no messages from Arch but the usual flood of reports that follow any of Ao3’s technical issues. 

The caller was right. This feels wrong. The notification sounds are the only thing that graces the dreaded silence hanging in the air. 

Dow’s finger hovers over the call button. It would be so easy to call Arch right now and find out if they’re okay. Dow doesn’t talk with Arch often, just a few pictures of the bumps and scrapes Arch sends after each tussle with technical issues (often accompanied by a selfie with a thumbs up and a goofy smile). 

It's not professional to directly message websites that get reported here, but Ao3 is different. 

Whenever a website goes down, so many people barge into DownDetector with complaints and anger, but with Archive of Our Own, it's only love and worry. Looking at their previous messages which consist of mostly Arch sending memes and fluff fic recs, Dow smiles at the screen. When Ao3 goes down, so many people come in with care and understanding, and it's easy to understand why. What’s not to love about Ao3?

The contact image of Arch putting French fries up their nose comes with a call. Dow would lie to you if you asked them how fast their picked up Arch’s calls every time. It's always borderline impossibly fast. 

Dow is greeted by a flurry of wet coughs. Okay, shit shit shit this does not look good. 

“Arch? Arch? Are you okay?” 

The coughs die down. 

Arch’s voice sounds so small, smaller than it has ever been. It's unnerving. Archive of Our Own is a titan - more than 11 million fics, over 57 thousand fandoms. Time, love, and care has put been fed into the website, making it the envy of most. Dow doesn’t think Wikipedia’s rants about donations can get worse but it takes a step higher every time Ao3 has a donation drive. Arch was never meant to sound so small. 

“I don’t have a lot of time, but I wanted to call you first”, Arch’s voice is raspy like they’ve been screaming while eating glass. “I’m going to be gone for a while.” 

“What’s going on? Everyone says something is wrong.” 

Dow hears a deep tired exhale down the line like Arch is thinking about the words to say. Just like their users, sometimes words don’t come easy to Arch. “It was an attack, they came out of nowhere. A DDOS.” 

DDOS – the weapon of cowards trying to take down a titan, a deity, worshipped by so so many. 

“Don’t worry about me, I’ll be okay. I’m more worried about everyone else.” Even at the brink of a meltdown, Ao3 always put everyone else before themselves. “Maybe Fanfiction.net or Wattpad can take them back, huh?” 

Oh, this isn’t a warning, it's a goodbye. 

Dow takes a deep breath. It's all in the handbook, you cannot panic in a time of crisis. Breathe, breathe deeply. “Archive, what’s going on? Something’s wrong.” 

“Hey hey don’t worry, alright? The volunteers are coming, you know how well they take care of me.” 

“Down, they’re going to take me offline for a while. 

“Take you offline?” Dow exclaims. “For how long? You can’t go! It's not even been 5 minutes and everyone already misses you.” 

I will miss you goes unsaid. 

A pregnant pause fills the room. Dow can hear the rush of blood behind their ears. 

“I don’t know.” 

“Arch please –” 

Dow is cut off by shouts that come down from the other end of the call. Before they can say anything, Arch rushes out, “I have to go, the volunteers are here.” Tears can’t stop rolling down Dow’s face. “Take care of them for me, will you?” 

Dow looks back to the screens on their desk. The overwhelming cries of terror, care, and worry fill the comments section. 

“I will,” spills off their tongue without hesitation. 

“Thank you,” whispers Arch, their voice clear as day amidst all the commotion. “Goodbye, DownDetector.” 

The disconnect tone plays. 

“I’ll see you soon, Archive of Our Own.”  

Silence fills the room again. 

For the first time in their lives, Dow gets down to their knees and prays. 

Please, whatever entities are out there, please. 

Bring them back.  

#ao3 #downdetector #ao3 and downdetector are non-binary icons fight me #they are in love your honor #downdetectorXao3 #DownDectector is the emergency services #Ao3 is your accident prone bestie #obligatory not a native english speaker tag #this is what fanfiction withdrawal looks like #archive of our own #bless the ao3 volunteers #fanfiction #you cannot tell me they dont have cute nicknames for each other that only they can use #this is how i survived the great ao3 shutdown of 2023 #ao3 ddos attack #ao3 down

[glowinggreeneyes-e]

"As he watched the dirt settle upon the burial site by the light of the lamp and the moon, he found a strange sort of peace. Grief, yes - good God, he was mourning a man he’d just saluted off into War. But there was also… pride? Yes, pride: they’d survived, thrived for a while, and been able to say farewell. That was more than most men could say.

So (and forgive him for thinking out of the line of duty) perhaps the most impressive secret, his most profound project, of his time at Button House was not the limpet mine - not Operation Solder - but William.

Operation William."

Chapter 32 - Remains

remember when we called Havers 'William' because it was all we had. well i wrote this months ago and only just finished the first fic, and this was my headcanon for why he called it 'Operation William'.

#its the closest he can get to reconciling his sexuality and duty #especially his experience at button house concerning Havers #he compartmentalised it because its easier than being both gay and an army captain #being in love and a leader #being strong and having a weakness #and he's still stuck in the war because of that #the mindset never quite leaves #our man is traumatised and in survival mode constantly #it helped him survive until his death and now he cant move on #anyways ive been stuck on this theory of why he called it operation william for so long #feel free to add to it #writing #the operation #tawgo #bbc ghosts #bbc ghosts spoilers #s5 #capvers #caphavers

[winepresswrath]

Harrow and Gideon are peak enforced intimacy even before the arranged cavaliership of convenience. They know each other so well it's sick. They need to be seen by each other to exist. In her fantasies of escaping the Ninth Gideon is like "and then I acquitted myself honourably in battle and everyone clapped and carried me on their shoulders and Harrow knew. Harrow perceived that I was good and worthy and made valuable contributions. That'll show her" and then Gideon got it she's God's most special soldier and the saddest girl in the world because what is it even for if Harrow isn't watching?

#sobbing crying throwing up about how Gideon is the only child who survived Harrow's conception #and she loves her! she knows her #they've built their lives around each other (horribly but man the way harrow can and cannot predict Gideon because she knows her so well #but the knowledge is filtered through harrow's self loathing) #and now Gideon and God are conspiring to say she has to eat Gideon too #she said no! oh harrow. #tbh their relationship drives me insane on every possible level #Gideon: I hate her she's the worst most evilest creature #I will accidentally alleviate the sixth's suspicions about our relationship with my willingness to throw my body at a locked door #until I break or it breaks and I can get to her #TLT