— ˚₊‧⁺˖ RED BULL GIVES YOU WINGS.
fandom. formula one
pairing. max verstappen x snowboarder fem!reader (fc: zoi sadowski-synnott)
about. y/n l/n, olympic gold medalist, goes viral after her unusal win. her boyfriend silently cheers from the sidelines
content warnings. social media au, not edited/proofread
notes. i vaguely remember seeing the headlines (years ago) of a teen snowboarder oversleeping because he was watching netflix the night before the race LMAO. so this is kinda the inspiration for that
SKYSPORTS
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername, redbull and 3'370'884 others
skysports Gold Medalist @/yourusername had a rough morning during the Winter Olympics, she overslept thanks to a late game night binge with her boyfriend. Yet despite also forgetting her coat, she takes the win by storm, all while flueled by three Red Bull's she had as breakfast.
"When me and my boyfriend sim race, we totally forget the time. It's his passion and I like to challenge him in something he thinks he's best in. I think it was 3am when I finally went to bed, luckily I found a some cans of Red Bull. You can also thank my boyfriend for that, he drinks that sh*t as if it's water."
Y/n takes the whole incident with stride, jokingly saying that she will have to repeat this routine if she wants to win gold the next time.
user SIM RACING WITH HER BOYFRIEND???
⤷ user don't know if we should thank him or not
⤷ user you'll probably never be able to thank him, y/n and her bf have been together for years now but she never revealed who it is
⤷ user does she even have a boyfriend??
⤷ user check her insta, she's been posting the same man for a long time now
user SHE'S SO FUCKING UNSERIOUS I LOVE THAT
user she's literally the definition of genz
user i don't care what anyone else says, this right here is queen shit behavior
⤷ user i crown thee, y/n l/n, to the queen of whatever this whole mess is
redbull See! Red Bull gives you wings, we take no longer any criticsm
⤷ user you better sign her up
⤷ user imagine she actually lands a red bull sponsorship just because of this
yourusername lol, that was fun
⤷ user LOL???
⤷ user i can't do this anymore 😭😭
maxverstappen1 👏👏
⤷ user MAX?!
⤷ user game recognizes game fr
user i don't know what's better. the camera catching her downing her third red bull right before the race or her cursing after she won
⤷ user meme of the year fr
YOURUSERNAME
liked by maxverstappen1, redbull and 1'552'082 others
yourusername happy to announce that i'm flying with @/redbull now! if one red bull doesn't work, try three. i won gold with it 😉
user SHE DID IT!!! Y/N NATION WE WON!!!
⤷ user now only the x games left
user can't wait for the insane promo shots
⤷ user bet she will do tricks from a cliff, right after drinking four red bulls
⤷ user straight from the skilift is my bet
redbull Proof that Red Bull gives you wings! Welcome to the family y/n ❤️💙
⤷ yourusername ❤️💙
user ahh the bigs smile makes me so happy, she deserves it
maxverstappen1 Welcome to the winners
⤷ yourusername thank you champ, i'll enjoy my stay!
user MAX LIKED AND COMMENTED
⤷ user MAXY/N NATION WE WON TODAY‼️‼️
⤷ user can we not pls... she has a bf
mathilde_gremaud welcome to the team y/n, so happy to see you here!!
⤷ yourusername thank you 😚
user i love red bull athletes welcoming newcomers
⤷ user a big family fr
⤷ user big and batshit crazy
⤷ user never said they're not lol
YOURUSERNAME
liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 2'003'863 others
yourusername the moment this trophy comes in our home i will throw it off the balcony. how dare you not kiss ME when you won your fourth world championship?!
all jokes aside, maxie, i'm so fucking proud of you, my #1 racer, my favorite dutchman and cat dad 🫶 to many more years of red bull domination (max and y/n version) love you sm!!
maxverstappen1 You will not touch my trophy.
maxverstappen1 Don't worry, I'll kiss you until you're sick of me
⤷ yourusername impossible!!!
⤷ user STOP THIS
⤷ user ew, that's sickening sweet (pls don't stop you guys are the sweetest)
maxverstappen1 I love you too, schatje
⤷ yourusername i love you more
⤷ maxverstappen1 Not possible? 🤨
⤷ landonorris okay we got it, you both love each other stop this shit
⤷ yourusername @/landonorris get out of my comments if you don't like it norizz
⤷ user WHEN IS IT MY TURN??
⤷ user not lando catching strays 😭
user IT HAS BEEN MAX ALL ALONG???
⤷ user five years of softlaunching... only for us to be hit by the biggest hard launch of the decade
redbull The Red Bull Powercouple™️
⤷ user simply lovely!
landonorris fucking finally! now max can bother someone else with his yapping
⤷ yourusername max doesn't do yapping, he just loves talking about me🫶
⤷ landonorris well, i got sick of it!! i literally should've ruined your softlaunch and tell the press about you guys
⤷ maxverstappen1 That's not what a friend would do
⤷ user HOW DID LANDO KEEP THIS SECRET FOR SO LONG??
⤷ user i bet y/n threatened him with violence
⤷ landonorris she did.
⤷ user HELP?!
user if max can comment on his girlfriend's post like a sap WHY CAN'T OTHER MEN AS WELL??
⤷ user they will never be max verstappen...
user brb, the highway is calling me
user con 😭 gra 😭 tu 😭 la 😭 tions 😭😭😭
⤷ user the bf was real... i fear i'm not strong enough to fight him for mother y/n...
⤷ user at least she's happy!!! (i'm actually crying my parasocial relationship is officially over)
taglist. @keyz-writes , @obsidianjewel , @aimixx , @themercyverse , @lem-hhn , @lupicalbestwolf , @akiraquote , @lilypadlover , @adorablezhui , @peqch-pie
DO YOU WANT TO JOIN THE TAGLIST? please send a non-anon ask to be added to the taglist. taglist can be general taglist (all fandoms and all works), fandom taglist (all works within the fandom), series (all works for specific series) or nsfw taglist (all nsfw works and all fandoms).
crossed off tags mean i can't tag you!
ARKHAM MAID 2024
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Murderbot Holding Hands
(Minor spoilers alert for Artificial Condition, Rogue Protocol, Exit Strategy pls check the tags)
First real post because I’m shy. Don’t know why it’s going to be a hyper-specific murderbot meta but here we go:
I’ve been rereading all the books after finishing System Collapse <3 and I want to talk about a small moment in Artificial Condition that I’d never noticed before. It’s near the end of the book when Tapan is in ART’s medsystem after nearly dying, and SecUnit says that when Tapan wakes up it’s holding her hand.
When Tapan woke, I was sitting on the MedSystem’s platform holding her hand. (Artificial Condition, p. 155 in my ebook)
I thought it was a really sweet moment, but it also kind of puzzled me because of SecUnit’s aversion to touch. Later when I was reading Exit Strategy, I noticed a similar moment when SecUnit holds hands with Mensah to help disguise them as they’re trying to escape TranRollinHyfa.
[Mensah] took a deep breath and looked up at me. “We can look calm. We’re good at that.” Yeah, we were. I did a quick review to make sure I was running all my not-a-SecUnit code, then I thought of one more thing I could do. As we stepped out of the pod, I took Mensah’s hand. (Exit Strategy, p. 87)
Reading these scenes felt different in a couple ways. In my opinion, SecUnit taking Mensah’s hand in Exit Strategy seemed like more of a big deal because it was a part of SecUnit’s reunion with Mensah, and we see its thoughts and emotions leading up to it. And it tracks that SecUnit might feel ok holding Mensah’s hand in that situation because of their close friendship. But the moment in Artificial Condition is more mysterious. We don’t get any of SecUnit’s internal monologue at the beginning because the scene opens when Tapan wakes up. And even though it’s clear in the book that SecUnit likes Tapan along with Rami and Maro, I wouldn’t say their relationship is anywhere near as close as its bond with Mensah. So why did it hold her hand?
I think it’s a neat moment that’s fun to ponder! And I have some vague ideas I’d like to share about it. (Some of this is based on the books and some is my speculation as an ace/aspec person dealing with touch aversion.) (Also none of these thoughts are mutually exclusive!)
Maybe SecUnit saw holding Tapan’s hand as a form of first aid after her traumatic experience and didn’t want her to panic waking up in a strange ship’s medsystem. This fits with SecUnit bracing itself to hug Mensah in Exit Strategy. (The memes of this moment are perfect lol)
But I was the only one here, so I braced myself and made the ultimate sacrifice. “Uh, you can hug me if you need to.” She started to laugh, then her face did something complicated and she hugged me. I upped the temperature in my chest and told myself it was like first aid. (Exit Strategy, pp. 82-3)
But I feel like SecUnit might not care as much about comforting Tapan in a similar way if it hadn’t already built up some kind of trust with her? Which brings me to Thought 2:
I think SecUnit might have felt safe holding Tapan’s hand because of the moment in Artificial Condition in the second transient hostel when Tapan laid down next to it. (Ofc I think rescuing Tapan from Tlacey’s ship was also a factor, trauma-bonding and all. But to me this moment in the hostel is more important.)
Thirty-two minutes later, I heard movement. I thought Tapan was getting up to go to the restroom facility, but then she settled on the pad behind me, not quite touching my back… I had never had a human touch me, or almost touch me, like this before and it was deeply, deeply weird. (Artificial Condition, pp. 136-7)
This is one of my favorite sequences in Artificial Condition (which is also my favorite book in the series because of ART! And because I find it quiet, reflective, and weirdly cozy even though objectively few cozy things happen now that I think about it). The scene is pretty mundane with a lot of fun bits like SecUnit pretending to need to use the restroom, be on a diet, etc. And we usually don’t get to see SecUnit hanging out with only one person. So it gives room for some small, but important feelings that I don’t think SecUnit has time to explore when it’s busy saving the day. Like how it feels about physical contact with humans.
(idk it reminds me of how like in ghibli films there’s usually at least one scene with the characters eating a meal or something because it sort of grounds everything else. I just like it!)
Tapan being close to SecUnit seems to throw if off-guard, but the context of the scene feels non-threatening and pretty mellow. So I think this gives SecUnit the opportunity to check-in with itself about this new experience. It still feels weird about it, but not in a scary or upsetting way. I think it’s almost this mutual vulnerability (Tapan feeling vulnerable and seeking comfort and SecUnit feeling vulnerable about her closeness and its own boundaries) that creates a bond between them, and that’s why SecUnit reaches out to Tapan to comfort her when she wakes up onboard ART.
That scene has become really special to me. And I would argue that it’s an important moment to SecUnit too because it brings it up again in Exit Strategy, along with a later moment in Rogue Protocol, thinking about times when it’s experienced physical contact with humans in a non-traumatizing way.
Except it wasn’t entirely awful. It was like when Tapan had slept next to me at the hostel, or when Abene had leaned on me after I saved her; strange, but not as horrific as I would have thought. (Exit Strategy, p. 83)
These moments seem to lead up to SecUnit offering to comfort Mensah later on because it’s reached a point where it feels willing to do so for her sake, even if it doesn’t want to seek out that kind of comfort for itself. And it’s really cool to see SecUnit navigate this throughout the books.
SecUnit starts the series with a strong innate sense that it doesn’t want to be touched by humans, but it’s allowed to refine those feelings in light of its new experiences. It’s boundaries are situational and personal, and even well-meaning humans sometimes struggle to understand them at first. Other times, SecUnit finds it difficult to understand it’s own feelings regarding touch and even changes its mind. But, importantly, the narrative always presents this as valid and worthy of respect.
This is a much more nuanced and realistic portrayal of defining boundaries than I’ve seen in a lot of media- one where it’s a constant and sometimes confusing process of self-discovery.
And these might seem like obvious concepts to some people, but they weren’t for me growing up. I really wish I’d read these books when I was younger, and maybe I would’ve given myself more grace to define my comfort level, grow, and change. But I’m glad that I’m in a place now where I can see and appreciate these things in what’s become one of my favorite series.
Anyway, I don’t want to say "thanks for coming to my TedTalk” lol. But very grateful to anyone who reads this and hope it was thought-provoking. Would be interested to hear other people’s thoughts on these scenes!
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song mingi boyfriend headcanons
genre: fluff
word count: 0.8k
warnings: cursing
requested?: yes
song rec: holy by justin bieber, chance the rapper
pls like and reblog if you enjoyed! feel free to request anything <3
ugh
when i tell you this man has my HEART
i love him he actually deserves the world
him as a boyfriend?? the best. the bestest.
when i tell you he is hopelessly in love. like. hopelessly. when he falls, he falls hard. and there's no turning back for him
we all know that mingi can be playful and lively, but he also has his shy moments. especially at the start of your relationship, he might stumble over his words or laugh awkwardly, and its mostly because he just can't believe he's finally dating you!
he is so cuddly. like. he wants physical affection a LOT. tries to reign it in at the start of your relationship but it's pretty obvious that he just wants hugs and kisses and cuddles :( he just craves it. he doesn't want to be too overbearing though, so sometimes he will wait for you to initiate any physical affection in the early days. your touch is so relaxing and reassuring to him honestly. as you guys get more comfortable with each other he will feel he doesn't have to worry about being 'too much' and definitely initiate most of the skinship for you guys <3
his favourite cuddles with you are sloppy, messy cuddles. like... a big mass of tangled limbs. he loves being as close to you as possible as well as you both being comfortable, which ends up with you guys being in odd positions a lot of the time. its fine for you guys but every time one of the member
his lips are so soft bruh. and he will constantly have them on you. he kisses you all. the. time. one minute he's sitting there, the next minute he is trailing tiny, ticklish kisses on your neck that make you giggle. even in front of the other members, he's puckering up those smooth lips of his. idk he just likes that sort of contact! so make sure to give him kisses back!!
wants you to wear his clothes. like i know some guys who get annoyed if you keep constantly borrowing their clothes but that is not an issue with mingi. he literally offers you his clothes without you even asking?? he just likes the way they fit on you. he's bigger than you so most of his clothes fall in a droopy, oversized manner, which he thinks makes you look super cosy and cute :(
he has the tendency to rest his head on your lap. will demand you stroke his hair because he absolutely loves it. while you stroke his hair he will tell you about his day but you could hear his voice getting more and more sleepier. will probably end up dosing off like this tbh
mingi has a habit of taking lots and lots and lotsssss of pictures of you. he especially loves the embarrassing ones like when you are snoozing on the couch, mouth open as you snore softly, or when you have just shoved your food in your mouth and he calls your name so you like directly into the camera. then he's run away whilst laughing obnoxiously - he was in the need of a new lockscreen
when you guys are away from each other, he tries to send texts as much as he can. and they are always funny, he might send a bunch of memes and spam you with emojis until you are online lmao. he does prefer facetiming you, especially when he's on tour and hasn't seen your face in ages. he will call you before he's about to go to sleep, but he would end up talking to you longer than anticipated, but all awareness of time goes out the window when mingi is talking to you. who needs sleep anyways?
dates with him would include:
karaoke dates - because he just completely lets loose in front of you, he is would love to do something crazy and random. taking you to a karaoke bar would be a spontaneous thing instead of planned. you guys will be belting a ballad together, hitting all the wrong notes in your awesome duet
shopping - i think it's safe to say that you guys are going to come back with a bunch of random shit. mingi will love to buy cute little things that he probably doesn't need. impulse buys all around!
spa dates - bro loves top be pampered i can't lie. loves having a massage or getting a facial done, he finds it so relaxing especially after a long week. he would love to treat you both to a luxury spa experience, and he would want to do everything like go to the sauna, the steam room, and the jacuzzi!
overall, he is so thankful to have you as a partner. you make him feel safe <3
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Can you do some fluff long distance headcanons with ran, rindou and kazutora pretty please?👉👈
sure!! i hope they’re alright, i feel a bit eh. about these hcs ngl ;w;
note: they are from different timelines as requested after chatting with requester~ // gn!reader
.・LDR with kazutora, ran, and rindou (hcs)
ーーー
hanemiya kazutora (post bloody halloween timeline)
kazutora is kind of used to talking to people long distance - he’s been in juvie twice where he was only allowed the occasional visit and basically lived off of letters from his closest friends
so when you told him that you were moving away and how anxious you were about your relationship, he was a sad that he wouldn’t be able to see you everyday, but he was also quick to reassure you that things would be fine
“you know, now we both have smartphones, so i’ll send you messages everyday. it’ll be like we’re right next to each other all the time.”
tora would probably buy you two matching keychains for your phones, like... a cute tiger thing but in slightly different colours for the two of you.
“so you’ll think of me everyday.”
“kazutora... you know i would already...”
but once in a while, he does also send a handwritten letter to you with a polaroid to keep!
he gives small presents, but they’re always well thought of and full of love <3
the best was a handkerchief which he sprayed with his cologne.
generally, he’s probably the calmest if he were put in an ldr situation ><
and when you two finally get to meet again, he would be running over and hugging you real real tight~
haitani rindou (tenjiku)
side note but i ALWAYS want to make rindou look good because 2nd best bf in tenjiku but ANYWAYS
rindou is a man that loves you very very much and he wants that to be known, even if you’re miles apart.
and it’s also partly because he can’t stand being away from you for so long :(
since we’re talking tenjiku, i do believe smartphones weren’t that big yet so... he also has to write letters and EMAILS OMGGGG EMAILS
he’ll attach photos and videos of what he’s doing throughout the day
and the thing he looks forward to the most every week is getting to read your letters or emails!!
he has a box where he stores all your letters and sometimes on days he really misses you, he’ll open them up and start reading them all over again…
umm assuming you two shared an apartment before you moved away, he would always hug your pillow at night to sleep :,(
he got used to cuddling you to sleep and now you’re not there so :((( it feels empty…
obvs hes not gonna tell u tho
thank GOD ran lives with him
rin is Down Bad i tell u
last thing omg.
rindou once sent you a CD in the mail and it was all just your favourite songs and remixes he made to suit your preferences
and at the end was an original song he wrote for you??!?!?!
you can practically hear his voice cracking nervously and him clearing his throat, but it’s so endearing you absolutely love it.
and at the end is “i love you. we’ll see each other soon.”
haitani ran (bonten)
i have a hc that ran is a bit of a bad texter
like. u know people who read ur message on the lockscreen and think of a reply, so they thought they replied but actually they didn’t?
yeah that’s ran
HOWEVER !
he changes a little when you move and you two can’t see each other so often.
mainly because he’s itching to text you all the time
will randomly send “this reminded me of you” pictures and it’s some weird ass meme that rindou sent to him but also some are those like
“this could be us but you’re halfway across the world :(” memes
he also likes to send voice messages telling you he loves you <3
hitn ran asmr pls
and on that note
nsfw just for ran below the cut <3 (minors do not read pls!)
some of the audio he sends is him moaning ur name while jerking off like my GUY CALM DOWN IT IS 2 IN THE AFTERNOON FOR U!!!
ran also sends dick pics or like a picture of him grabbing his bulge through his pants and it’s always captioned something
“fuck i miss you so much”
also sometimes sends a video of him jerking off to you and a message after like “a little gift for you <3”
he’s so horny someone stop him
at this point you’ve received more porn attachments from him than non-porn attachments.
ran also likes mailing you stuff (read lingerie) and asks you to send pictures of you wearing it.
cue another picture of his hard-on
honestly he thinks this is really fun and makes finally being able to meet you again all the better with all the pent up tension <3
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Busy with important family events over the next couple of days, and so I thought it would be good to get a day-and-date release for this Debrief on the latest entry in my Sapphic Valley series, "How You Get The Girl." Be sure to read the story before jumping in!
Did you do it? Did you read the story?
Alright, I'm trusting you. Go ahead and hit that 'Keep Reading' button you scamp.
It only seems appropriate to start this Debrief off by addressing the elephant in the room. I haven't posted anything in over a month, and "By Moonlight" came about a month after its predecessor, the conclusion to "Stone-Cold Lovers."
Work, naturally, has been a major factor.
You can see me talk about that almost two weeks ago in this Tumblr post I made about writing in a coffee shop, which came weeks after I actually started writing during a trip to a friend's house.
===
Side note:
Just wanted to take a moment and acknowledge my beautiful Haley and Emily keychains. My friend who's responsible for the affairs of one ghostly farmer named Jizzabelle (Gisabelle to the laymen) got them for me! Only appropriate after I commissioned some art of her and Abigail.
Emily was my first Stardew wife, and Haley currently holds the biggest place in my heart. They make a lovely duo!
And I'll avoid any sister-wife jokes
===
While I've had some other projects like Zine writing to take care of, work and life can't explain the full absence.
The best way I can think to explain things is that:
I had the general writer's block, and
Despite the best intentions and advice of my irl friends and online pals like @alchemicallymoon and @duelbraids, I couldn't force myself to "break" that block by just... Writing something else.
This is entirely the result of my own psychosis. I have a tendency to carefully plot things out and impose a timetable that really doesn't need to exist. When I feel the cause is righteous enough, it's hard to get around that. In this case, I knew I needed to get my poll-winning idea out after dawdling for holidays like Valentine's Day, and then I knew I only wanted to post one more story before jumping on a very special event for my upcoming 30th AO3 post.
Thus, here we are: arbitrarily forcing myself into a spiral of writer's block misery because of a silly promise on Tumblr and my own sense of ordered chaos.
At the very least, this meant it's coming out not long after my AO3 pal InsertACatchyPennameHere also emerged from the woodwork to tell me they're working on something INSPIRED by my four-person friend group farm adaptations.
Much love to them, wherever they may be.
I'll probably start writing more eclectically now that my shoulders are unweighed, but don't expect my next publication to hit until I'm finished working on teasing the big event. All you Pokemon fans better get hype!
And oh how sweet this publication feels. Between my great set of recent ceramics, the figure drawing class I've been attending, and creative writing, I've felt more fulfilled than ever.
You're here to talk about Stardew, though. So let us talk.
This idea began less with any one event as it did a desire to advance the Alexis/Haley relationship, and Haley's characterization in particular. It was always going to end with watercolor painting reference, but 2 Willow Lane was what I really wanted to dig into.
As I see it, a lot of what keeps people invested in Stardew when its comfy vibes becoming routine is the air of mystery in Eric Barone's worldbuilding. Haley and Emily's parents being some world-traveling duo who left their home in the siblings' care for who knows how long (and who knows how many times over their lifetime) really piqued my interest. So much so that the new writing challenge I set for myself in "How You Get The Girl" was crafting a particularly long set of descriptions that emphasize how overwhelming the parents' influence feels — without creating an impenetrable wall of text.
Hopefully I succeeded in that. Let me know!
I tried to include some vaguely real world-adjacent references into that description of the house, as happens with the magical-realism world of Stardew Valley. For example:
The computer sitting next to their bonsai tree is an iMac G3, the kind of old 'futuristic' tech that my dad loves!
A Speedwell refrigerator is based on even more vintage tech, the Mayflower fridge, but named after a different ship ridden by Pilgrims coming to America.
That city that the family visited in an old photograph with a "monument of arching, interlocking steel" is, of course, Paris — with the statue bookends referencing any number of statues in the Louvre.
Haley's FAD magazine could be referencing any number of publications, but Vogue is probably the closest analogue to what I imagine her reading.
Furthermore, I took some notes on describing the home's layout off of my sister's apartment building, and I asked my bestie @trybard for input on what kind of hanging plant should be used in the transitional hallway. Hanging pothos, philodendron, and spider plants were the three options provided, and my response was appropriate:
They know so much about plants.
Go bug them about it.
I drew on other friends' knowledge to help decorate the house. Specifically, I asked one of my witchiest friends what kinds of protective wards someone like Emily would leave around doorways and windows. She had... A lot of reference material.
I picked Hazel given it purportedly "protects against evil; encourages abundance and inspiration." I also picked Amethyst as one of Emily's loved gifts, one that purportedly "absorbs negative energy, promotes harmony."
My witchy friend is the same one who provided the TikTok that I referenced in my advertisement post:
Perhaps the most important thing about 2 Willow Lane was the recurring motif of Barbie's Dream House.
As a surface-level reference, I think the groundwork is clear. Blondie's love of fashion and general queen bee demeanor fits comparisons to Barbie well, and she lives in a big ol' house full of stuff. We all saw Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie last year. It's still in the cultural zeitgeist.
I'm hip with the kids.
Yet, early on I also tried to make it clear that if this is a "dream" house, it's neither Haley's nor Emily's dream. Haley is a Barbie in that stereotypical sense, but also there's much to be mined from the analogy of a sort of powerless doll in an immutable house, constrained by social obligation to her family rather than literal plastic and stickers.
The cold open of Jodi and Sam was meant to stand alone, but in execution I also think drawing Kent's absence into the conversation makes for a more thematically rich comparison to these sisters who appear to have themselves more put together.
My beta reader said this wound up being one of my stronger stories because of how all of that intertwined, which I appreciated given how down on myself I was following the whole writer's block thing.
But also.
Also.
Alexis gets to be horny. She's hitting on lonely MILFs and watching girls shake their asses to the tune of bad reality TV.
We love a buff dommy mommy farm girl in this house.
Haley is probably horny too, she just doesn't realize it yet. For now I think it's fun enough to play into her being coy about building excuses for Alexis to come over, and then getting incensed when Emily barges in on their private time meant to learn more about this farm girl she just can't get out of her head.
===
Fun fact:
Every story in this series is named after a Taylor Swift song, but I know next-to nothing about her discography. All of them are suggestions by my friend whose house I was at when starting this story — the same one who controls Gardenia on the farm.
While I went with "How You Get The Girl," her alternative suggestion was "The Man."
===
All that w|w talk aside, I also want to give Sam the loveable idiot a shoutout. Had to do a fair bit of research into how skateboards are constructed for his failed ollie, and I slipped in a reference to shitty old technology that's exclusively for my beta reader to enjoy.
I also tried doing some agricultural research to figure out how the folks at Kevin Farm could have grown cucumbers so there'd be a jar of legitimate pickles... But that was getting too in the weeds.
Insert laugh track here
Decided to just go with pickled artichoke hearts to save everyone a lot of trouble.
And where does "Kevin Farm" come from, you may be asking yourself. Or the fabulous "Kevin's Special" with its definitely not innuendo tagline.
That story will have to wait for another day, my friends.
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chapter 15
Can’t you like it for me?” he says with big puppy eyes.
You look away.
“You’re being emotionally manipulative here.” shut up girl im loving u too much i cant
“You are playing with fire here, Bunny. Try not to burn yourself”, you grumble.
He chuckles and pecks your cheek.
“I like the burn”, he rasps against the shell of your ear, turning to the front afterwards.
SHUT UP IM CANT TAKE IT. try not to lose your shit challenge- mission failed successfully
He treated you so goddamn fucking well that sometimes you still felt the urge to punch him in the face and run away jk in the corner, i'll take that as a compliment
Lately the latter have become more and more. YAY
“Hey kiddo. How are you doing?” he says in a surprisingly deep voice for such a small frame. me with felix and taehyung
“for half a million bucks I expect to have the painter constantly working on it in a metal cage in the middle of my living room or something.” - ........ - a few bystanders had heard you and were now looking at you with weird eyes. SHUT UP THATS SOO ME except my voice would be low and nobody would hear but could be loud too cuz universe makes it louder at times when u dont want anyone to hear shit
although he was stressed and exhausted he never once smelled of alcohol. AHHHH IM SO PROUD OF HIM *gives a big ass hug and a smooch
WHY DOES NERO'S SHOULDERS LOOK FAMILIAR TO HER AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK FAMILIAR TO HIM AHHH STOP I HATE IT THIS CHAPTER IS A ROLLERCOASTER
again a fluffy moment after the tense thank you, her threatening to buy green and purple pillows PLZ that sounds like me trying to threaten my parents by telling them im gonna marry a cat crazy dude
“I’m not asking for it. I am very much anti punishment uwu i love this stupid noodle
He swallows heavily, “a-are we going to make out now?” he asks, grasping for your hips. he is such a cute and horny noodle pls and no u are about to cringe for the rest of your office time
FUCK GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN FIGHT FOR YOU IMMEDIATELY
“don’t say that what the hell my cock twitched.”
“I am not going to apologize because I am way too turned on to care.”
He looks from side to side with the tip of his nose rosy.
“What’s with the sudden horniness oh my god?”
“It’s just that I never really saw you work before and it’s kinda doing things to me.” SAME HERE IM FEELING IM WATCHING SOME HOT CEO FROM KDRAMA BUT EVEN BETTER AAAAH
It makes his ass cheeks tense up and forces a quiet whimper from between his lips. SHUT UP SHUT UP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON FROM THIS MOVE ON WITH MY DAILY LIFE????? VANESSA HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITAUTIONS ??
I REPEAT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITUATIONS??? JIWOO SOUNDS SIERIOUS OH SHIT NOW SHE KNOWS AAAH
WHY IS SHE CONNECTING THE DOTS SOMETIMES CHARACTERS SHOULD BE DUMB PLEASEEEE also why is there a group of people surrounding kook??? 👀
the whole thing was soo tense i sweated through my shirt now im a stinky kid -_- BUT WE LOVED IT the emotions was captured soo well and he was supportive yet very unsupportive if your brain's going haywire with an anxiety/panic attack
Twirling him threw him straight into subspace. *insert meme i hope i dont fall, her: twirls him
kook : oh no mommy
the mom is sweet AND I CANT STAND THE DAD UGHHH
i prayed for her to not go to the mirror AND SHE DID NOO its really the worst thing to do during a panic attack :(
that was soo scary even i felt the uncontrollable demons while reading and thanks it ended on a good note and it was cute.
anyways i wish her a great day next morning(tho the story has ended) cuz them muscles be hurting like a bitch oof
Me reading through all your reactions:
hahahahha I love how you went on an emotional rollercoaster with this chapter jfdjsf also you quoting so many parts is my weakness hehehe thank you so much for doing that
BROORORORO THE TWIRLING PART WAS THE ONE OF THE FIRST TIMES I WENT "oh fuck i have a mommy kink" LIKE IDK IF YOU GUYS KNOW BUT AAOL WAS MY MOMMY KINK AWAKENING FADSFAHH
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ello :D i was wondering if you had any hcs for dtqk boxing scenarios? every time sap gets donos where he’s asked about who he’d win in a fight with i go insane
i haven’t stopped thinking about dream massaging george’s biceps after a boxing workout and george getting all giggly about it for over a year lmao
(Hi thank you thank you for the ask, I’m a big fan of yours :)))
They’d do boxing-lite, I imagine. Padding and no head shots. The fight ends when whoever is reffing says it does or one gives up. It’s for show and for fun. Of course, some of them get wayyyy to into it. (Sapnap. Sapnap, and also Sapnap)
Lmao I love Sap he’s so ballsy. Like I get he’s strong, we can all see his muscles but…pls he’s so small?? And he always wants to fighttt. I bet he starts off real strong and it goes downhill quickly against the majority of them. The onlyyy person he’d be able to get ahead with is Quackity.
Speaking of Quackity, what in the world is he going to do?? He’s so tiny and noodle-y. That boy can’t fight. The others don’t want to go to tough on him, probably just little tummy taps that really just make him giggle. The teasing possibilities for Quackity are endless too. Mickey Mouse boxing? Guys Plssss? His beanie?
Karl has the most potential out of all of them. I imagine him having a hard time holding back his giggles during all the ‘seriousness’ though. But I think he’s strong!! Luckily, he’s a sweetie. Like, he’ll meme them, but he can’t help but be a sweetieeee in the end. He’s such a cuddle bug, the second he wins he just clings to them, nuzzling their face into his opponents neck. “I’m sorry!!!”
I probably would have thought George would do better if I hadn’t already seen that video where George, Wilbur, and Jack go to the gym and he’s the only one who doesn’t take it serious for even a second. Literaly giggling and joking and jumping the whole time. This isn’t his scene and everything is so so funny. I bet it would hard for the other boys to step to him with his big goofy grin. And his boxing stance?? Remember him winding his arm up like popeye? Pfft.
I think this scenario would stress Dream outttt ahaha. He doesn’t want his boys to be hurt. Also, he’s the largest by far and knows he would just decimate the others. Picture this- Dream using his big boxing-gloved hand to hold back Sapnap’s forehead, holding him at arms length, while Sapnap just screams and swings at the air between them. I’d say most of the fights and training with Dream would just devolve into something similar.
I think if anyone would push it from boxing into a full blown tickle fight it would be him, too. Cuz he actually doesn’t want to hurt any of them even if it’s not going to be that bad. Also, how could he even resist with George or Karl? They’re both there just being so giggly and stupid. If Dream tossed his own gloves aside and then cornered them and attacked their sides and tummies…perfectly fair right?
And the aftercare aspect with Dream is so cute stahp 🥺🥺 I headcannon he’s kinda mad that they even wanted to do this, but now he wants to take care of them. His dummies. George bicep massage?? I’m dead I’m dying. “George stay still, you’ll feel better in the long run!!” *George squirming and giggling hysterically, pinned in place by mama-Dream*
And I actually always headcannon Quackity’s worse spot as his back and Karl’s worse spot as his neck/shoulders. So now I’m picturing them off to the side watching Dream tickle tor-I mean massage George and are just like :0. Maybe they look at each other. Quackity’s poor little face heats up at everything so I’m sure Dream would catch on instantly. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you guys next!”
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Season 3 Episode 6 Thoughts
WOW this episode was as Ricky put it “heart wrenching”
Like I know he’s been feeling it all season but I’ve been so well fed with the content. This episode I genuinely felt what Ricky felt. That was hard
But before we get too into rina I’ll make some other notes first
Ashlyn feeling the fireworks and pw not??? Oh sorry pw you’re bones but that was so sweet for Ashlyn
I have really enjoyed watching her discover herself and her sexuality this season. I remember season one thinking she was not super straight and so it’s cool really seeing her find her full identity this season (something she stated she had a hard time with). Which is an interesting insight to who she is at EH because she always has loads of clubs she’s in and stuff right? It’s like she could never settle on being one thing because maybe she actually didn’t totally know herself but now she does.
I also appreciate the Maddox and Jet storyline. I was team blue but very happy yellow won. It seemed like a really sweet victory for them and it was nice watching Jet try to restore that relationship
I kind of expected that storyline to resolve this episode so it was interesting seeing that Maddox still doesn’t feel totally resolved. I wonder what else will happen
I’m SO excited for Sebby to come back for prom 🥹 I miss him so much and I’m sure Carlos does too ❤️
The scene of Miss Jenn teaching EJ her directing tips 😭😭 pls it was so funny. When she talked about angrily shoving the papers in the binder. I NEED someone to gif Ej doing that so I can use it as a reaction meme lmao
I also LOVED her referring to herself as mommy or that they were her children, her son, etc. anyone else it is kinda weird but idk it works for her?
Although it didn’t work for Miss Jenn last season when Ricky got mad at her 😶 but I didn’t say that
I also wonder what the Miss Jenn and Mike agenda is? This cruise feels kind of out of left field for their relationship? It doesn’t seem like they were together that long for her to just hop on a boat with someone? But also what happened to Mozzarella Stick? Tbh I’m indifferent as of right now to both couples. I would be happy with her with either guy… I’m just confused because S2 left her relationships sooo up in the air so I’m curious to see if that gets more resolved S4
It was SO healing for my childhood to see Corbin perform again. I am actually sad he didn’t do the wildcats cheer too. It was a nice rina moment that came from it but I’m like 🥺
I also appreciate the implications of Corbin reliving his Disney games days. And then mixing dancing and basketball together after Chad made such a big deal about dance and baseball/basketball not mixing. Just loads of nostalgia 🥲
Carlos kept mentioning something about wanting a dressing room?? And they showed miss Jenn giving a little face that seemed like she was up to something with that? I wonder what that was about? What if she made him his own little dressing room before the rehearsal? 😭 she showed ashlyn how important her part is and she might do the same for Carlos 😭😭 oh that’s cute
Also miss Jenn finding the licorice at some random store was a shout out to the “big summer blowout” in frozen. I love 🥰
I made a separate post about this on my page but I think the pw canoe scene was very on the nose to The Little Mermaid? I kind of think it might be a hint at next seasons musical
I’ve been so-so about the jetney agenda but watching him cheer her on and the parallels of them having stuffed animals + some of the looks have been cute I’m ngl
I kinda got annoyed at Val this episode. She was very… pushy? Like pushy with Kourt, pushy with Ashlyn understanding “who she is”… idk something about this episode rubbed me the wrong way with her
Ok now for the best part RINA
MY SWEET BABIES I MISSED YOU (lmao am I miss Jenn coded??)
The HUG AND HAVING ONE EVERY EPISODE 6. So now they have massive parallels for each 5th and 6th episode of the seasons? Tim you better keep this up for future seasons
But really the hug was so sweet and watching Gina go to him first because she was proud of herself 🥲
ALSO the troyella basketball parallels??? Hello?????? That was so cute. I wanted to see him go behind her and help her shoot.
Also I wanted ricky to be the only one who helped her up after she fell but we can’t always win 😭
Isn’t it interesting that EJ ONCE AGAIN points out to Ricky something he can’t figure out as ginas boyfriend? (Why she hasn’t laughed at his jokes but is laughing at Ricky’s) oof the jealousy is strong in this one
But also Ricky made gina laugh 🥹
I LET COLOR WARS SLIP THROUGH MY FINGERS
Also watching Ricky’s crying was HARD. He hasn’t cried that hard for anything else, including his break up with Nini. (I pointed this out in another post). Like this REALLY affected him
AND THEY DID THE RINA CUE WHILE HE CRIED BECAUSE TIM IS EVIL AND LIKES TO WATCH RINAS SUFFER
Ngl I was a teeny bit disappointed with that scene in the cabin. I thought that we would get the flashback or even a little more around why Ricky was so upset but jet made things about him then Ricky had an idea and the scene was over. I just feel like the dialogue got cut really short and there could have been even a couple more sentences to make the scene feel a little more whole. I would have LOVED the flashback here too but we can’t always win
I will say though, I’ve had this theory that the characters that the kids are playing not on stage is Ricky being Kristoff and jet being Sven and this scene amplified that. Remember how annoyed in frozen Kristoff got at Sven when he tried to make Kristoff go back to Anna or keep going through the woods with her? Kristoff got snappy. Me thinks Mr Bowen is portraying that same quality
I loved watching Ricky cheer Gina on in all the events 🥹 you can even hear him in the scene where she is rock climbing. It’s just such supportive boyfriend material unlike SOMEONE 🫥👀
Also did you notice when Ej was telling gina all the reasons he needed the show to go perfect she was the LAST reason? It was like he was explaining all of his anxieties and stress and then it was like “oh yeah and you too so I don’t have to stress over that either”. It was just.. yikes
(I still really would love a Kourtney and Ej scene where they talk to each other about the anxieties they’ve been facing)
I would love to see some sort of parallel where Gina feels or hears the words or something about the fireworks when she’s with Ricky. It’s interesting how miss Jenn pointed that out and we clearly saw them with Ashlyn and we also clearly saw how pw waited and waited for them to show. It was very in your face that they wanted these fireworks to happen so badly and they were never going to come. Instead of showing pw watching the fireworks to show they came we just got Ricky crying to the rina cue. I think having some sort of parallel to the fireworks with rina is going to be our way of knowing rina are finally on the same page. Ricky knows his feelings and whatever feelings gina has swallowed or push to the side have resurfaced and she acknowledges them too. Their love will feel like fireworks 🎆
ALSO (someone on Twitter pointed this out can’t remember who so if you know pls comment so they get credit) the scene where ricky takes Ej to gina parallels the scene heavily where Kristoff takes gina to hans. It’s not what he wants but it’s putting the other person first which shows you love someone. (Which I pointed out was a direct quote from frozen)
And sorry not sorry I’m gonna say it: I don’t think Ricky is just crushing on Gina or just likes her. He even made this a point “on accident” last episode. Ricky is IN LOVE with Gina. His feelings are so much deeper than he or others may be willing to admit
Ok friends I’m sure I have more thoughts but it’s 3am so my brain is VERY tired. I will post more throughout the week because it’s going to be tough waiting to get to episode 7 😅
Please send asks talking to me about theories, questions, etc through the week. I would love them! I have one in my inbox right now I’ll get to tomorrow but I’d love to discuss more with ya’ll :)
Ok have a good night! ❤️ rina endgame
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&&. @igniferous is not safe from the besties
i didn't rb a meme and u didn't send me anything but i love and just wanted to fill this out fot them okok <3
texts the other memes at 3 am: hakuno!!!! but very out of context and very likely to be cats. wolf would probably be like "wtf is this". would like to think that infects him a lil bit tho! and the next time he sees a meme he's just -squints eyes- -tentatively sends to the moon menace girl- (wolf vc this is what she calls a "meem" isn't it 🤨)
tries to convince the other to do an idea that definitely sounds questionable: hakuno: "hey wouldn't it be fun if we-" wolf: "no." (she manages to drag him into it anyway)
is the designated driver and who always gets wasted: don't think neither of them would ever be Wasted(TM) but hakuno doesn't enjoy drinking so she'd appoint herself designated driver. i just imagine chilly drunk wolf in the passenger seat telling her some story while hakuno is :| but listening attentively actually. seems fine and dandy except hakuno's not the best driver and with the way she's driving, you'd think they're from gta pulling the biggest bank heist in the world (hakuno: this is a nice podcast -bounces up from speedbump but it unbothered bc she's too short to hit the car roof- -she would've gotten a concussion if she did-) (wolf: SVFKSG ok anyway- it was 428472 years ago when FEKGJSJFKSJFKDKFJ)
always has to host the impromptu sleepover: ok but i'm thinking wolf........ because hakuno would come over and wooooh oh hey it's real hecking late now! she's fine with going back herself (even though she's homeless actually) but hold on wolf's not gonna let her go into the dead of the night like that-- it's dangerous 😤
who’s netflix account gets mooched off of: don't think either would have one but!! i imagine hakuno talking abt it (unable to buy it tho bc she's penniless 😔 /hj) every now and then and wolf ends up getting one some day. he doesn't say it but hakuno sees that there's an account with her name on it already and she's just :0 !!
brings all the snacks and who supplies the movie: hakuno would split the work between em! it's funner that say, she thinks (hakuno: nod nod.) so if she brings the snacks, he supplies the movie, and vice versa. it'd be so funny tho because it'd rlly show the difference between poor simple girl hakuno and rich boy wolf sjghdjg
is usually the first one to say sorry after a fight: 🤔 i don't think they'd ever get into a serious fight but maybe wolf.
.. after he says it hakuno's like "...we were fighting?" Σ(°ロ°)
is the ‘ mom friend ‘: WOLFF ok hear me out!!! i just think he'd be like those seemingly very strict but actually caring mothers okok. also hakuno's good at taking care of others but not herself so, yes. wolf pls look after ur bestie thank uuu
calls the other at 12 am to wish the other a happy birthday without fail: hakuno and she'd be so extra p l s ...... tosses pebbles at his window (if he has one) to get his attention and then starts singing happy birthday with the most flat voice everrrr. bonus: you know that one scene in kungfu panda 2? where po's yelling to shen but he's so far away shen can't hear him? if that happens with them i just know hakuno's chaotic enough to start climbing the damn walls to get to wolf 😭😭 (hakuno vc it's faster-)
is the better wingman to the other: somehow i feel like they both could be a real good wingman for each other :chinhands: it'd make for an interesting scenario tho!! i think it'd be vvv fun to explore >:3
‘ the strong must protect the sweet ‘ , who’s the ‘ strong ‘ and who’s the ‘ sweet ‘: hakuno can kick ass so i think she might just be the strong in that aspect (tho i think wolf is pog at magic!!! iirc!) (...wolf teaching hakuno magic when? 🧐) but she doesn't choose violence okok-- she's the strong that encourages wolf to show more of his sweet side 😌
pulls the other up for karaoke to sing a duet together: wolf with a very big sigh after hakuno's continuous and not so subtle hints for him to sing ("do you want the next song?" "there's no need to be shy" "oh, this song seems like it'd be fun. want to try?") but it comes with the condition that she sings with him !! hakuno chooses drop pop candy and if wolf feels like he might die from embarrassment i would not blame him!
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@dcviated asked:
Dogelace :v
Ship meme? Ship meme!
General:
Rate the Ship:
Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs
How long will they last?
I imagine a lifetime, I'm sure it's fair to say you can't always say for certain - but they are cute together and I personally love both of them. They have similar hobbies and likes, but are different enough to keep each other on their toes too - plus anyone who gets Anelace plushies is an instant love interest let's be real.
How quickly did/will they fall in love? -
I think it was fairly quick, compared to our other ships, but at the same time, it works well for them? It was mutual pining/unrequited for a while too which just butters my bread, huhuhu.
How was their first kiss? -
Sweet, oh so very sweet - I could've gotten cavities from that ask. I love to re-read it from time to time, just from the sheer pleasure of Anelace's feelings being requited alone!
Wedding:
Who proposed?
This is something I imagine Dogi's doing, at least to me he seems like a traditional sort of guy - and plus, we wanna see Anelace cry.
Who is the best man/men?
Hurrr, Adol - maybe Goban if we're talking fantasy verse. Feel free to let me know if there are other best men you can see.
Who is the braid’s maid(s)?
Estelle's gotta be a bridesmaid, Carna too - Mizuki if we're talking AitSF, and maybe the other girls if they meet each other in verse.
Who did the most planning? -
I imagine it's a joint effort, maybe Anelace does more of the decoration side of things and I can see Dogi dealing with the food and stuff. Yeah, I imagine they work at it together.
Who stressed the most?
Probably Anelace between the two.
How fancy was the ceremony? -
Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.
I'm not sure between bigger than a Normal church wedding or smaller than one, but I can see it as a small wedding, but a fun one? I just see Anelace and Dogi being happy to be together for the rest of their lives.
Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? -
No one? Maybe Dark Fact (LOL).
Sex:
Who is on top?
In most cases Anelace - but I can see them mixing it up.
Who is the one to instigate things? -
Both? Both is good.
How healthy is their sex life? -
Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now
Whether they're camping, traveling together, or just together - I can't imagine they wouldn't be together on a regular basis.
How kinky are they? -
Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head.
I think they're still figuring out what they're into.
How long do they normally last?
Uh... a healthy amount of time.
Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms?
Sharing is caring.
How rough are they in bed? -
Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.
How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? -
No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.
Children:
How many children will they have naturally?
One or two? I'm not entirely sure - it's something we'll have to discuss one day :3c.
How many children will they adopt? -
Mmm, I guess if they got attached to a child they might adopt, again it's something we'd have to talk about.
Who gets stuck with the most diapers? -
Both? Both is good.
Who is the stricter parent?
Ahh, Anelace maybe? Not so sure on this one.
Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? -
Oh this is definitely Anelace.
Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? -
Ah - Dogi I think.
Who is the more loved parent? -
Dogi? Dogi, totally.
Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings?
Mmm - I'm sure they both tend to attend. Both are probably super nervous but also very thankful for their kid(s).
Who cried the most at graduation? -
Anelace, hands down. Fight me on this.
Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law?
Dogi, without a doubt, he was a ne'er-do-well himself once upon a time.
Cooking:
Who does the most cooking?
I wouldn't be wrong in saying that Dogi tends to enjoy cooking, but I'm also sure Anelace likes to make things for Dogi too.
Who is the most picky in their food choice? -
Considering Dogi's choice in profession, at least in modern verse? Anelace - but even then not so much. Unless it comes to Ice cream.
Who does the grocery shopping? -
I feel like it's something they both tend to do.
How often do they bake desserts? -
Anelace loves to bake desserts all the time.
Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? -
Yes, very yes.
Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? -
Both? Both is good.
Who is more likely to suggest going out? -
Dogi is a connoisseur of restaurants and local delicacies so, I'd have to say, Dogi.
Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? -
I guess Anelace, but not really.
Chores:
Who cleans the room? -
Dogi, Anelace has way too many plushies.
Who is really against chores? -
Anelace, she'll do it - she just hates it. There are more important things she could be doing! Like appreciating her plushies, or protecting those who need her.
Who cleans up after the pets? -
I think they both would clean up after the dog, but he's a good dog.
Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? -
Anelace.
Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? -
Neither, I think they both tend to enjoy company.
Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? -
Hmm, Dogi.
Misc:
Who takes the longer showers/baths? -
Probably Anelace, she does enjoy a good soak.
Who takes the dog out for a walk? -
Both? Both is good.
How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? -
Every holiday, Anelace dedicates a day to it!
What are their goals for the relationship? -
Hmm, I think for now they're just happy to be together for now - they need to talk about goals still.
Who is most likely to sleep till noon? -
Anelace tends to get up early, and I get the feeling that Dogi's the same.
Who plays the most pranks? -
Again, I see both of them playing pranks - Anelace more teasing rather than actual pranks though.
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Stormy & Haseul
˗ˏˋ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ultimate ship meme / @sparkssflv
General:
Rate the Ship - Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs
How long will they last? - for a long time i believe.
How quickly did/will they fall in love? - i don’t even remember? maybe a few months. i guess love came after they dealt with the sexual tension you know...
How was their first kiss? - full of hatred but that made it ten times better.
Wedding:
Who proposed? - WHO WOULD i guess stormy would
Who is the best man/men? - hmm maybe dongjun or daeho or anyone of the band. all of them??
Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - ilsung and juho. I KID. dohee would be.
Who did the most planning? - pffft haseul for sure... she would want it to be perfect
Who stressed the most? - i think she would stress the most but might stress stormy out too cause she can be really indecisive and annoying about it.
How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.
Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - haseul’s father for sure.
Sex:
Who is on top? - stormy because she prefers to be a bottom in bed even if she emits this dominatrix vibe most of the time hhhh
Who is the one to instigate things? - oh no... stormy, we know who gets nasty. but she does too so.
How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now
How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head
Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - yeah, most likely they do.
How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.
How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.
Children:
How many children will they have naturally? - maybe one.
How many children will they adopt? - they could adopt one as well.
Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - they both would ...
Who is the stricter parent? - i think haseul might be a tad bit stricter than stormy.
Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - haseul for sure. would nag them from here to the moon and back. would tell them what is the law and what happens if they break it.
Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - neither of them..
Who is the more loved parent? - oh, both are loved.. okay maybe it’s stormy.
Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? i’d say haseul but i see storm going too.
Who cried the most at graduation? - haseul for sure. she would cry her eyes out.
Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - they both will, especially haseul because ... lawyer.
Cooking:
Who does the most cooking? - they just go to eat outside majority of the time so not much cooking is done.
Who is the most picky in their food choice? - neither of them to be honest.
Who does the grocery shopping? - i guess they both do, together or separately.
How often do they bake desserts? - never.
Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - pretty sure they are more of meat lovers.
Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - haseul would do that. romance is not dead!!!
Who is more likely to suggest going out? - both of them.
Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - i have a little faith in stormy but who knows, maybe they both would.
Chores:
Who cleans the room? - haseul does.
Who is really against chores? - stormy? change my mind.
Who cleans up after the pets? - they don’t have pets i believe.
Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - neither
Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - oh haseul would be stressing over that to be honest.
Misc:
Who takes the longer showers/baths? - they both do, especially if they shower together.
How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - i’d say they don’t go all out with decoratig even though they can afford it.
Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - you bet it’s haseul. but maybe storm too.
Who plays the most pranks? - i think he’s more into pranks and she hates it so much but lowkey also loves it. it’s complicated.
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Five: *staring out the window existentially*
Five: *turns and points at Vanya*
Vanya, trying to hold back laughter: Why are you pointing at me?
Five: *moves closer to Vanya, making a cross with his fingers*
Vanya: If anything, I should be pointing at you, for you killed my father, Julio!
Five: You don't even have a father! And my name isn't even Julio!
Klaus: She doesn't have a father anymore.
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⭒ kaeya/reader: the wrong kind of captain ⭒
request for killshot anon: killshot anon! here's that kaeya idea i had it sounds kinda dumb now that i type it out but it can't live in my head forever: kaeya x pirate!reader. i know everyone likes pirate!kaeya but hear me out--
he jokes about inheriting his eyepatch & being a pirate by blood, right? but this is the cavalry captain; he's probably never been on a ship bigger than a rowboat in his life. so imagine him meeting actual pirates and trying to turn on the charm (pirate jokes..) like he always does but they're just 🧍♂️. not buying it. maybe he's in the traveler's party & accompanies them to liyue & plans to go to inazuma w/ them as well? so he's on the alcor for the trip too? just a setup idea idk. we know how he likes to boast & play around, and we also know how the alcor's crew responds to newcomers (much less one who claims to be a pirate, however jokingly, but knows nothing abt sailing). he talks a big game, but the crew sees right through it and he makes a fool of himself somehow (tries to show off but doesn't know shit abt ships? hmm). it's like the "you know, i'm something of a scientist myself" meme, kinda. the only one who isn't offended by his wildly inaccurate statements (save kazuha & beidou) is beidou's first mate (us??👀), who finds this horse boy to be quite unintentionally funny, & they wind up talking more & oops kaeya gets a crush. i'm running out of plot but i can visualize kaeya trying to impress them, only to be knocked down a peg when the ship hits a rough wave and he nearly falls to the deck (bc no sea legs) before the first mate catches him with a knowing & faintly amused smile.
anyways i know this relies a lot on my hcs of him and also i've been up for like 24 hrs so forgive me if it doesn't make much sense/is ooc,, i just thought it was a funny dynamic. you're free to write or not write something for this of course, i just had to get it out of my head dfkdsfhkjsdk
I KNOWWW THIS IS FROM HALF A YEAR AGO BUT THIS CONCEPT LIVES IN MY HEAD RENT FREE!!!!! he’s so cocky but pls he’s not gonna know jackshit cuz it’s all for show. he’s ridiculous i love him kaeya can we make out. this got kinda long congratulations ur ideas r always banger /gen i stayed up til 2am writing this
⭒
pairing: kaeya/reader
characters: kaeya alberich; mentioned traveler, paimon, beidou, kazuha
genre: fluff
word count: 1795
⭒
This isn’t the first time you’ve seen the Traveler and Paimon, but the blue-haired fellow next to them is new. You weren’t expecting more than the two extras aboard the Alcor for the trip to Inazuma, but you suppose it’s nothing strange. The closed nation isn’t exactly friendly—and this unfamiliar companion seems like he’ll be useful, if the cryo Vision at his hip means anything. You’re sure you’ll find out soon enough. You huff to yourself, tearing your eyes away from where Beidou is—across the deck—speaking to the newcomers. Your attention turns toward the ship’s bow, staring absentmindedly out at the horizon as you cross your arms and lean back against the railing behind you.
Your moment of peace doesn’t last long as you spot a flash of blue approaching out of the corner of your eye.
“Captain Kaeya.” Your head turns to face forward again, where the blue-haired man—Kaeya, apparently—stands. He’s extended a gloved hand, which you do nothing more than glance at.
You raise an eyebrow. “You some sort of fleet captain?” You ask, and he grins.
“Sure,” Kaeya says. “My grandfather was a pirate, too.”
“Was he now?”
He hums.
“Who else do you think I inherited my eyepatch from?”
He can’t be serious. You’re not even sure how to respond to that, staring dumbfounded—and frankly astonished—at the man before you. His uncovered azure eye sparkles, and you think there’s no way this isn’t a joke.
But he doesn’t say anything more, doesn’t burst out laughing or knock you on the shoulder or say “gotcha!” No, he just winks—or maybe blinks, you’re not sure—turns on his heel, and strides back over to the Traveler.
You initially thought he’d fit in well. Maybe Kaeya wasn’t lying; you’d say he certainly looks the part, albeit a little more extravagant than you’d expect from someone who spends their days getting tossed around on the seas. He gets along with the crew, and Captain Beidou seems to like him. Certain members have their doubts, and you’re not alone in thinking he’s lying. Despite this, you’d say he’s fun to be around—charismatic and witty as he is. Although he claims to know the ins and outs of a seafaring vessel such as the Alcor, he’s all too eager to spend the days before you all head out trailing behind various members of the crew, paying a little too much attention as they work.
More often than not Kaeya’s shadowing you. Archons forbid you ask him to assist you, he’ll put his hands up helplessly, throwing on a pout as he tells you how he’d love to, but you’re just so much better than him at whatever you’re doing. Every time. You asked him once, perhaps a little sharply, how he manages to command his own alleged crew if he won’t help with even the simplest tasks.
“Now, now,” he’d responded. “You said it yourself: commanding, not doing.” As if Beidou doesn’t do just as much—if not more—than her crew combined. But you’d bit your tongue and let him get away with it.
The act ends the first day out on the open sea, when a particularly large wave sends the blue-haired “Captain” stumbling in front of everyone, nearly crashing face-first into the deck… had you not been there to catch him.
There’s a burst of giggles and sneering, though it passes quickly as Beidou hollers for everyone to get back to work.
It takes you a second to realize you still have your arms wrapped around Kaeya, his face tucked under your chin, his hands hovering somewhere behind your back as if he’s not sure if he should touch you. Clearing your throat, you straighten up, dragging him with you. You hold him at arm’s length by the shoulders, ensuring he won’t just fall back over.
Aside from a few unkempt hairs—which Kaeya fixes by running a hand through—a stunned expression, and you swear a slight flush to his cheeks, he seems unharmed. “You okay?” You check, and he nods.
“All thanks to you, dove.” And he does that thing again, where you think he winks, but he could just be blinking. You’re not sure you want to think about why you feel like he winks at you all the time. Instead, you sigh, grateful he seems to be back to his normal self.
“It was nothing,” you say, brushing past him to get back to your actual job. But you can’t resist teasing, pausing to glance back at him as you allow a smile to creep onto your face. “Captain.”
You swear you hear him snort, and Gods does the sound make you awfully giddy.
Kaeya finds himself alone more often aboard the Alcor as the days stretch on. He understands the crew’s misgivings, and doesn’t necessarily mind that the only people who will still talk to him are the Traveler, Paimon, Beidou, and that Inazuman samurai, Kazuha.
Oh, and you.
He’s sure it’s mostly out of pity, but he likes when you talk to him. He likes when you sit next to him at mealtimes, or invite him to accompany you throughout the day—you show him how to actually work a ship; maybe one day the pirate thing won’t be a joke—or, like now, when you find him at night, gazing out to where the dark, star-speckled sky meets an even darker sea.
Kaeya’s not sure what makes you stay, but he’s not complaining. He could listen to you talk for hours, and he would embarrass himself again and again if it meant he could hear you laugh and see you smile. He’s lucky he doesn’t have to humiliate himself; you find yourself smiling regardless when you’re with him.
“It’s Cavalry Captain Kaeya?” He jolts as you whack his shoulder, but he knows you’re not angry.
“I was telling the truth when I introduced myself as Captain Kaeya,” He states, almost matter-of-factly.
You roll your eyes, giving him a playfully exasperated shake of your head. “You still lied to me.” Kaeya snickers and tilts his head toward you.
“You’ve only just figured that out? How smart,” He croons, and you whack him again.
You like this; just you and Kaeya—Mondstadt’s Cavalry Captain—above deck, everyone else below in their quarters winding down for the night. Aside from your voices, the only sounds are the wind and the waves against the hull of the ship. He’s not a bad guy, you’ve found, though you never really suspected so to begin with. His lies are moreso jokes that sometimes go a little overboard—his exact wording. There was never malicious intent, Kaeya just enjoys getting reactions out of people.
Two can play at that game.
“Still, horseboy—” He parrots the nickname back at you, appalled, and you struggle to shush him as you break into a fit of giggles, “—I’m surprised a wave was all it took to knock you over.”
“Riding horseback is a lot different than staying steady on a violently rocking ship,” Kaeya hisses, eye narrowing. “I’d like to see you even mount a horse without falling off.”
“You’re just mad you don’t have a decent set of sealegs, rookie.” He doesn’t seem to have anything more to say, and a comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you turn back to the ocean.
It’s weird to think that in a few days’ time, you’ll have to say goodbye to the man beside you. The thought makes you queasy, twisting your insides tighter the more you think about it. It’s strange, really. You just met him, and you already don’t want him to go. And he’s going to Inazuma, of all places. You know the Traveler’s plenty strong to protect themself and those around them, and Kaeya’s a Knights of Favonius Captain, but you can’t help worrying. The Electro Archon has been unforgiving to her own subjects for two years, you can only imagine how she’ll treat outsiders—ones that snuck into her nation, no less.
You shiver, from your thoughts and the breeze and the ocean spray that hits you as the ship rocks. Kaeya watches as you frown.
There’s a rustling beside you that you barely register, and then there’s a weight around your shoulders. It startles you out of your thinking, and you realize Kaeya’s dropped his scarf onto you.
“You seemed cold,” he hums, flashing you a genuine, gentle smile. You swallow harshly.
“Yeah.” You nod, nuzzling into the fur. It smells like him, and it only wrenches your heart more.
Because you love him, you realize.
Maybe he’s a pirate after all. But of the worst kind, you think, because all he’s stolen is your heart. And there’s no way he’s giving it back.
“You’ll be safe, right?” You ask. Your question seems to surprise him, if the widening of his eye means anything.
“Of course,” he purrs. “Why? Are you worried about—” He stops when his gaze meets yours, over the fur of his scarf. Kaeya’s face softens, and he steps closer, taking one of your hands in both of his. “Darling, you’ve nothing to worry about.” Raising your hand to his lips, Kaeya’s eye stays locked with yours. “We’ll be careful.” He places another kiss, feather-light, on your forearm. “I’ll be careful.” Tugging your arm—and consequently, you—closer to him, his lips hit your forehead. “I promise.” He’s so close, his chest almost brushes against yours as he breathes. In and out, again and again. You feel the puff of his breath against your cheeks, his face inches away from yours. You wait for him to move, heart thundering wildly, but he doesn’t.
“You really promise?” You ask, breathless.
Kaeya nods. “I do.” And then he kisses you, lips connecting with yours as your eyes flutter shut. His hands move upward to cup your face, thumbs stroking your cheeks—which are burning at this point. As he sighs against you, you toss your arms around his shoulders, attempting to pull him even closer to you.
By the time you separate, you’re both panting. Kaeya takes a step back so he can look you in the eyes better, and your stomach drops when you see the twinkle in his gaze and the smirk gracing his lips.
“Pirate’s oath,” he says, touching a hand to his heart dramatically.
You shout, and the man has the audacity to laugh after ruining the moment with his ridiculousness. You shove him, and he stumbles backward. Kaeya makes sure to grab the collar of your shirt as he falls to the deck—no, you had not pushed him that hard—pulling you down with him before locking his arms around you.
You can feel his grin as he buries his face in the back of your neck, and despite your struggling, you find yourself laughing along with him.
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— genshin boys as your late night study buddy
ೃ ft. childe, diluc, kaeya, zhongli, xiao and albedo x gn! reader
ೃ 200-299 words per character! (they are your bfs in this! bc MAN do i desperately want one of the genshin boys to cram school works with and shower me with luv and affection.) ♡
ೃ tags: college au, modern au, and lots of fluff.
ೃ thank you so so much for 1k notes on my very first batch of genshin hcs! i appreciate all the luv it received and i can never thank all of you enough 🥺 i’ll be making a genshin masterlist soon to compile all of my current and future works so pls stay tuned for that!
ೃ if you want to be a part of my taglist, answer this form! ♡
ZHONGLI:
– Zhongli would be a very chill study partner. He will always keep his cool and focus, never letting his attention stray away from less trivial things. If he can focus, he’ll focus. There’s always this sense of comfort surrounding him that brightens up your mood and productivity. The both of you are sat in this long table, papers, books, and cute matching pencils are sprawled about. You lean your head on his shoulder, as he serenades you with his deep and butter voice, explaining all the formulas to you. Being able to study in peace and quiet with him is always a blissful experience. He never fails to brew you green tea (as it helps the brain function) even if that meant going down to the kitchen at 2 in the morning. He always brings a small humidifier and some essential oils with him that can help brighten up the study mood and that emits a wafting vanilla pinecone scent to keep you happy. (He’s just fancy like that.) When he doesn’t understand the concepts right away, he’d turn to you, his sharp amber eyes gazing at yours with nothing but innocent and love, and asks: “(Y/N)... what reference is this supposed to be? pepe the frog? kermit the frog? here come dat boi? aren’t they all just amphibians? what are the differences between them? I am very intrigued.”
CHILDE:
– Childe loves a challenge. An academic challenge. He loves the thrill of finishing school works the night before the deadline, he loves studying for a pop quiz twenty minutes before the bell rings, and most importantly, he loves to pretend he doesn’t know how to solve point a to point b if that means getting to spend time with you as you tutor him on how to do so. He’s at the top of the class, He’s popular and friendly, He’s the captain of the Archery Team, and one of the vice council members of the Fatui Club. But, no other title will ever come close to being your study buddy. You and Childe always chill on the bed whenever you study. Especially when the both of you have the sudden urge to just laze around. Well, it is the wee hours of the night, so just lounging around and trying to resist the urge of sleep is pretty understandable. Sometimes, the two of you would take power naps in between study sessions. This meant cuddle times! Childe will always cuddle with you, (he’s the big spoon and you are the smol spoon) and often times you would be immersed into your textbook while he’s scrolling through his phone and looking for some of the current and popular memes. He’d poke you on the cheek and show you what he’s found. It was quite annoying sometimes and you would reprimand him for it, but it never fails to make you laugh. You jokingly suggested one time that the two of you sneak in the library after closing hours, and your chaotic boyfriend turns to you with the biggest smirk plastered on his face. “Let’s do it baby. I know the law.”
DILUC:
–You and Diluc are the cutest pair of night owls. So, studying late at night is never a problem with him because with the help of each other, the both of you are unstoppable. An actual power couple. Batman and his love interest who? I only know (Y/N) and Diluc. Mondstadt University should be giving you the title of #NoSleepGang for the “Campus Cuties” awards because the two of you are able to ace every test still despite lack of sleep. You and Diluc are very very organized. The both of you own matching couple planners (that the both of you had gifted to each for Christmas) and have your entire study schedule planned out already. Since the two of you prefer to study at night, your dates are usually done during the day. Which meant never having to worry about the upcoming finals whilst you’re at a cute little café with him. The both of you have respective desks whenever you study together, but you never fail to gaze at your crimson-haired boyfriend with the cutest pout and biggest puppy eyes. He always gives in and next thing you know, your swivel chairs are practically glued next to each other and the both of you are cuddling in your seats. One thing that Diluc never fails to do is pamper you with comfort food or little gifts that you love after a long and tiring week of hell (aka exams) It’s such a sweet gesture and the blissful relationship that you have can’t get any better than this.
“I got you some boba and that necklace from Pandora that you’ve always wanted. I-I’m so proud of you (Y/N). You did great, my love.”
KAEYA:
- You are the Lawful Good to Kaeya’s Chaotic Evil. Kaeya is always tempted to ask for answers from your professors. He’s quite the teacher’s pet, but with good intentions. That’s just how he rolls. Every time he jokes about going to the faculty to help out and the answer sheets are just out in the open, waiting to be snatched, you always glare at at him and punch him softly on the arm, every time he tries to bring up the idea. To which he would always reply with, “I’m kidding. Just kidding my love.” You and Kaeya have amazing study hacks. He is always able to find a movie that is somewhat related to the topics that the both of you are currently studying about. For example, when the topic was an introduction to different branches of science, Kaeya chose Big Hero 6 as the “Educational Movie Of the Day.” He is always able to find something fun and informative for the both of you to watch. Well, Kaeya does find fun and interest in everything. Another effective strategy that both of you do is every time you or him get an answer right, you reward each other with either a kiss on the cheek or a bear hug. Both of these affectionate gestures give you butterflies in your stomach anyway, so it doesn’t matter which is which. With the ideas that Kaeya constantly makes up every single day of your study sessions, there’s a high chance that you’ll never fluke a test ever again.
“Oh. That’s pretty cool of you (Y/N). You got 30 correct answers! If we count everything, so I basically gave you 15 forehead kisses and 15 bear hugs. Congrats! I know we’re going to ace our finals!”
XIAO:
– Xiao is extremely intelligent and talented in a myriad of things. However, he lacks self-confidence. You’ve sworn to your boyfriend that you’d help him gain confidence in his academic abilities. Which is why you became study buddies in the first place. It served as dates with him too! Although he stubbornly refused at first, his reasons being that he can do things by himself and he doesn’t need any help. You continued to encourage him that this was going to help the both of you and it was a way for the two of you to bond, and Xiao hesistantly agreed right after. As the captain of the soccer team, “The Liyue Adepti”, The only free time that Xiao has was during the evening which is the reason for your scheduled late night studies with him. This brought so much more intimate and sweet moments with him though! It meant sleepovers with him, midnight snack runs, and casual early morning strolls in the park. It became sort of a routine. Your hand interlaced with his, the crisp morning air, the little chirpings birds, and the tranquil swaying of the trees brought so much comfort to the both of you. Xiao would be the type of student to not speak up unless he’s called. Even if he knows the answer. The both of you sit on some floor pillows whenever you would study. So, whilst you read aloud, Xiao always hugs you from behind, resting his head on your shoulder.
“I don’t deserve the patience and love you give me, (Y/N). I am eternally grateful for everything you’ve done for me. I hope you know, that I’ll always be here for you.”
ALBEDO:
- Being the university’s library assistant has it’s perks. Access to infinite knowledge, quiet solitude within the library walls, and being able to hang out with your boyfriend. It was truly a perfect deal. After classes, Albedo would be heading straight over to the library to do his work. You’d meet him there and wait until he gets his work done, and then the two of you head home together or have dinner. Albedo likes to plan things in advance. He’s quite busy, being a part of university’s alchemist group and as a library assistant, but, he will always study with you. He even brings Klee with him at times too! She’s always an energetic and cute addition, + she tattles on and on about how in love Albedo is with you and how he would never shut up about you at home. Albedo puts a lot of effort into creating review materials for the both of you. He makes very intricate drawings of modules, dioramas of certain science models, and has all the formulas memorized for him to list down. He’s a genius after all, and although you’ve constantly told him time and time again that he doesn’t have to make a review paper specifically catered to you, he still insists. He always gifts you one whenever it’s exam week (he adds extra detail to them during your finals) The cutest thing about these papers are scribbled about in all of the pages. The cutest doodles of the two of you with hearts and flowers drawn all over. Albedo + (Y/N) is even written in the last page, along with a heartfelt message:
“I put all my faith and belief in you, (Y/N). I know you can do this. I’m proud of everything you’ve reached so far, my beloved. and I know you’ll reach greater heights. Let’s continue to excel and thrive together. I can’t wait to spend the rest of this journey with you.”
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long shots ; miya osamu
pairing: miya osamu x f!reader
synopsis: miya osamu is the teacher’s assistant for food chemistry i. you can’t stop thinking about him.
tag(s): college!au, slow burn, TA!miya osamu, grad student!reader, fluff, reader is a go-getter!! ; warning(s): profanity, suggestive themes, talk of insecurities and imposter syndrome ; wc: 5.6k
a/n: happy birthday to @starrysamu! i love u. pls excuse any errors. i’ll weed them out later! btw this fic is not a sugar daddy au LOL
HIS NAME IS Miya Osamu and he always looks like he has it all figured out. Comes in every class with his black hair perfectly tousled, the sleeves of his dark button-up rolled to his elbows, a cup of coffee in one hand and the strap of that black messenger bag in another.
“He drives a BMW, did ya know?” Isla says in your ear one morning. Your only friend in Food Chemistry I gives you a pointed look before sitting back in her chair in the lecture hall with a smirk on her face. “Saw it this morning. Bet he’s loaded.” The two of you watch the subject in question walk across the classroom and settle in his seat at the table in the corner.
“Shut up,” you whisper with wide eyes. A grin–– far from innocent–– makes its way onto your face. “Imagine being Miya Osamu’s sugar baby.”
“He’s not old enough to be a sugar daddy.” Isla looks at her nails disinterestedly. “And that’s too many AUs in one. He’s already the TA, for god’s sake. This isn’t some shitty Wattpad novel.”
A light giggle slips out of your lips. “I can see the title already. My Sugar Daddy is the TA?!”
Now, if anyone had been listening in on your conversation, they would’ve assumed many things about you. The first being that you’re both gold-diggers. This is untrue–– at least, in your case. Isla, you’re not so sure about, given how your friendship only goes back about one month. But she tags you in memes on Instagram so maybe it’s as real as real gets. Their second assumption would be that you have a big fat crush on your TA. That one’s complicated, mostly because it’s true, but only kinda. It all started in the second week of school when Isla caught you staring at Osamu and slipped you a post-it note with both your initials encircled in a heart. And, because you’re shameless with a good sense of humour, you made a show of kissing it while she was looking. And thus began your meaningless but incredibly entertaining, satirical, co-written fantasy about Miya Osamu.
It also didn’t help that on the first essay you got back, Isla’s paper had been marked up with “are you sure?”s and “this is a jump”s, while yours had “excellent reasoning” and “insightful analysis”. You’d even gotten a little comment at the bottom: y/n, fantastic work. you should speak up in class more often. –– OM
But Miya Osamu doesn’t play favourites because the next week you’d gotten another essay back, this time with another comment at the bottom: y/n, not your best work. you could’ve done better by connecting your first paragraph with the second using grant’s reading. conclusion lacked punch, too. all the best. –– OM
Every time you’d read the words scrawled in blue ink, you’d felt a pair of eyes on you. But you chalk it up to Osamu being a careful grader. A good TA. Someone who cares about his students.
Isla calls bullshit on that. You’re not really sure how to feel about her stance.
The classroom door opens and shuts again. You don’t have to look at your phone to know that it’s nine on the dot. Instead, you and Isla straighten your backs, pull out your notebooks, and focus. Your no-nonsense professor says “good morning” in her usual perky manner before jumping right into her keynote presentation.
“Did you all find the reading okay?” Professor Lee asks an hour into the lecture.
A chorus of “yes”s fill the air. You bite your lip, wondering if revealing that you didn’t understand shit will out you as the class idiot. Or maybe your silence is telling enough–– maybe the people in the seats beside you have noticed the grimace on your face and are having thoughts like ‘gee whiz, am I glad I’m not dumb like her’. Heat rushes to your cheeks. Sometimes you really wonder if you’re smart enough to be here. Occurrences like these do nothing to dispel your insecurities.
You vaguely hear her ask something like, “Any thoughts about the reading?” It’s not that you’re actually dumb. It’s just that this class is ridiculously hard for an introductory course, even for a graduate programme. From the start of the semester til now, fifteen people have dropped the class. There’s just twenty of you left. Guess a ridiculously hot TA can’t save a course’s drop-rate.
Before you can make your mind up on what to say, your professor moves on from her question.
As you look off to the side of the room for a break from your thoughts, you find a pair of blue-grey eyes pointed in your direction.
Everything about you, from the expression on your face to the way your muscles tense, makes you look like a deer caught in headlights–– even though he was the one caught staring in the first place. So maybe your shamelessness works on a scale.
Miya Osamu lifts one corner of his mouth.
And as if the exchange hadn’t happened at all, he looks back down at his laptop and continues typing.
The rest of the lecture goes through one ear and out the other.
“Everyone, I believe Osamu has something he wants to say,” Professor Lee says as everyone begins packing their bags.
The raven-haired TA slides out of his seat and sits on top of his desk. “Yeah.” Osamu clears his throat and crosses his arms over his chest. You notice how the muscles in his arms bulge from the movement.
“Whipped,” Isla mutters, grinning mischievously.
“Him for me,” you whisper back, though your eyes do travel back to his face where they should’ve been all along. Osamu catches your gaze and holds it. And then he looks away again.
“Now, I know you’re all Nobel prizewinners in the making,” he begins, garnering a round of snickers and giggles from your classmates. Most people say that cliques dissolve in college. That there’s no such thing as popularity amongst graduate students. That much, you agree with. But no one ever said anything about popular teacher’s assistants. Especially smart, attractive, witty teacher’s assistants like Miya Osamu. “But in case you didn’t understand the reading or would like to develop a deeper understanding of it, don’t hesitate to email me. I’ll try to host a review session all of us can attend.”
Professor Lee smiles appreciatively at Osamu, adding, “That’s a wonderful idea, Osamu. Guys, please take this opportunity if you struggled with the reading. I know eighty pages is a lot, but our next three classes are structured around the concepts in the reading and the mid-term next week will almost exclusively be about it, too.”
Well, shit.
Hi Osamu,
I was wondering if I could get some help with the reading from last class. To be frank, I couldn’t make it past page 15 and I’m lost like a snot-faced five-year-old in a shopping mall on Black Friday. Sorry. Thanks in advance!
Regretfully,
Y/N
MS Candidate
College of Agriculture and Life Sciences
Haikyuu University
no problem. is 5 pm tomorrow at jack’s okay? we start on the concepts from the reading next class so i want to get you up to speed asap. let me know. thanks.
OM
PhD Candidate
College of Agriculture and Life Sciences
Haikyuu University
It’s five minutes to five when you pull into the parking lot of Jack’s Diner. The shiny, retrofuturistic eatery is a university favourite but the empty parking lot tells you it’s completely deserted right now (and rightfully so–– who eats dinner before six?). The black BMW parked a few spots from your car, however, says that you’re not alone.
Osamu’s figure comes into view as you reach for the handle to the front door of Jack’s. The twenty-six-year-old sits by himself at one of the bright red tables in the back, typing away on his dark grey laptop.
His head lifts up at the sound of the opening door. Osamu calls out your name and waves you over.
“Hi,” you greet with a smile, sitting down across from him.
“Hey.”
You look around before leaning forward on the table. “Is anyone else coming?”
“No.” Osamu sits back in his seat. “I thought about hosting one big group, but then I realised that it’d probably be stressful for the staff here.” He nods his head in the direction of the kitchen. “And I had a hunch that everyone would have different questions. Forcing everyone to review concepts they already know is a waste of time.”
At first, you nod. That makes sense. But then you furrow your brows. “So how long have you been here?”
Osamu blinks. He hadn’t expected you to ask about him. “Hmm? Oh.” He taps his phone to check the time. “Just a while.”
Quirking a brow, you ask, “And how long is ‘a while’ to you?”
“Seven hours,” he admits, chuckling lightly when he sees your jaw drop. “A lot of people had questions. They just don’t act like they do. Anyway, time flies. Really, it does.” Quickly, he clears his throat and sits forward. “So, about your email.” He grins. “Not sure if you meant it to be funny, but it was.”
“I’m glad my distress was entertaining for you. Do you TA just to watch grad students suffer?”
“Perks of the job,” Osamu says. His grin widens when you giggle. He’s never heard you laugh before and he realises at that moment that it’s really nice. And then that same grin falters. Gracefully, of course, and imperceptibly to you. But not to him. Is it okay for him to be… thinking things like that? About a student? But you’re not really his student since he’s just the TA. Right? Osamu ignores the weird feeling that comes over him and clasps his hands together at the edge of his laptop. “Back to your email. Can ya tell me what you’re confused about?”
Three hours and two Impossible Burgers later, you suddenly understand everything about food molecules so well that you wonder why you’d even been confused in the first place. But besides that, you’ve also picked up things about Osamu. As a person and not an idea. Not that you’d been actively searching for fun facts about your TA. But they’d stuck to your brain like gum at the bottom of a desk. He likes to slip sarcastic quips into a conversation every now and then. Eats burgers upside down (“The right way,” as he’d said, smirking). Is friendlier than he looks.
“You’re really good at explaining things,” you comment as Osamu shuts his laptop closed.
“Well, I kinda have to be,” he says. And maybe it’s the mental fatigue catching up on him or the fact that he’s real fond of the reason why he can break big concepts down into morsels but suddenly, the rest of his thoughts spill out his mouth like wine. “I have a twin brother with potato salad for brains.”
“Oh?”
And before he can stop himself, he tells you about Miya Atsumu, the pro-athlete you’ve definitely heard of but never gave too much thought. And then you hold onto the fact that they were both on the volleyball team and you ask of which school, so then he tells you about Inarizaki, the high school he attended, and then his decision not to go pro to go to college, and then––
“Sorry,” he laughs, cheeks turning pink. “You probably didn’t need to hear all that.”
“No, it’s fine,” you say–– and you mean it. “Your life is interesting.”
Osamu leans back in his chair. “Well, I’m sure yours is, too.” He holds your gaze like it’s the key to your presence. It’s an invitation. The kind that comes from people who don’t really know if they want you around but also don’t want you gone.
You take it.
Osamu shouldn’t–– he really shouldn’t–– but he wonders about the things you didn’t tell him the entire drive home.
Isla laughs when you tell her about what happened at Jack’s. You lay in bed with your phone next to you on speaker, your face turned on your pillow so that you’re staring out the window at the city below.
“He wants you,” she sings.
“Or he was just being nice.”
“Methinks not!” Isla giggles. “He’s intrigued, girl! You’re like that cute little new mystery in his life and he just wants to get to know you.”
“I think he was just being polite.”
“Or he’s crushing on you!”
“In your dreams.”
“You mean yours? Boo, you’re no fun today. Usually, you go along with the jokes.” Isla’s tone is playful on the surface but full of implications.
A few silent seconds pass. Yeah, you think, agreeing. I do.
“Girl,” Isla drags out the word in a high pitch, saying it like a scientist says ‘eureka’. “You’re not playing along anymore because it’s real now. You're actually catching feelings!”
“Am not!” you laugh.
“The Y/N I knew would’ve said ‘nah, bitch, he’s catching feelings’ and I think that says all there is to say.”
“Okay, I think he’s cute but it’s not a crush,” you concede, grinning. “And he’s the TA, Isles. It’d never happen.”
“Not while he’s still a TA in a class you take.”
“Isla.”
“Ask him out once this semester ends! Unless you’re chicken.”
“I’m not asking him out.”
“Knew you were––”
“Have you seen me? He’s asking me out.”
Miya Osamu walks through the door at eight-fifty as usual that next morning, dressed in his usual button-up, holding his usual cup of coffee. But this time, as the rest of his tall frame passes through the doorway, Osamu’s eyes subtly scan the faces in the lecture hall, lingering for just a while over yours. The corners of your lips turn up. You hope he saw that.
“Bitch!” Isla whisper-screams. The students sitting around you turn around at the noise and grin at each other when they realise it’s just Isla being… well, Isla. She shoos them away jokingly.
“What?” you whisper back.
“Care to explain why our TA was literally eye-fucking you?”
“That was hardly eye-fucking,” you retort. “Maybe like an eye-handshake.”
“Yeah, a naked eye-handshake where his thang is handshaking your––”
He does it again the next class.
And the next.
And then he doesn’t. Miya Osamu walks through the door to Food Chemistry I at eight-fifty in the morning in a navy blue button-up with a cup of coffee in his hand and looks through the rows of seats in the lecture hall for your face, only to find it missing.
He debates pressing the matter.
hey osamu,
i wasn’t in class today because i’ve been sick with the flu (no big deal, just feel like i’m dying). a classmate sent me pictures of the slides from today so i think i should be fine, but is it okay if i email you with any questions? thank you very much!
miserably,
Y/N
MS Candidate
College of Agriculture and Life Sciences
Haikyuu University
y/n,
of course. sorry to hear that you’re sick. let me know if i can do anything to help you. the midterm is next week. get well soon.
OM
PhD Candidate
College of Agriculture and Life Sciences
Haikyuu University
“You writing that the midterm is next week did not offer me any peace of mind, by the way,” you say, spinning around in your chair as Miya Osamu enters your pod in the library.
He offers you a wry grin. “Hello to ya, too.”
“Was that an accent?” You thought you’d heard one at Jack’s, but you couldn’t be sure because it’d been so spotty.
Osamu slips into the seat beside yours and pulls out the laptop in his messenger bag. You catch a whiff of his cologne–– something spicy and woody, but clean. It suits him. “Nice catch. Yeah, I speak a regional dialect. Took me a while to smooth it over but it still resurfaces every now and then.”
“Why?”
“It just didn’t seem fitting for a PhD candidate, I guess,” Osamu explains, opening the slides from the class you missed. A day after your initial exchange, you’d emailed him again (with a much clearer mind) and asked if he could go over the slides with you in person.
i literally feel like i’ve been given the homework from russian lit, you’d written. except the russian has been translated to hieroglyphs and my task is to choreograph an interpretive dance based on the hieroglyphs.
Osamu had snickered when he saw your email. that doesn’t even make sense. must be the fever talking, he’d been tempted to write. But that strange feeling had come over him again, the one that’d screamed at him to keep it professional, goddamnit, so he’d played it safe instead and sent is eight pm at the main library okay? He hates that you’re getting a watered-down version of his personality. Osamu swears he’s a lot more interesting when he’s not, well, a TA.
“I think it’s fine,” you say, smiling. “I like it. It’s you.” And suddenly, you’re wondering if it’s okay to be complimenting your TA. If it’s okay to say that you like things about him, or if that crosses some grey, unclear line. Is it weird to treat your TAs like they’re your friends? It’s not like TAs are real teachers. Right?
A grin–– wide and genuine and almost excited–– grows on Osamu’s face. He rubs the back of his neck as his eyes flit over to the laptop screen. “Thanks. Really.”
You nod. But you feel like there’s more that he might want to say, so you wait.
“I got a lot of shit for it when I came here for my master’s, y’know. Not to my face, of course, but people would refer to me as ‘the guy with the accent’. A professor once said it made me seem crass. Said it’d hold me back in my career.”
“So you changed.”
“Adapted,” Osamu corrects. “It’s hard to admit but conforming is sometimes all you can do when you don’t have the power to change the system. Can’t really make everyone suddenly respect a dialect.”
“And after you’re finished with your PhD, you’ll go back to speaking in that dialect?”
Osamu looks out the window and smiles, probably imagining the plans he’s already made about the future. “Yeah.”
“What if you have to speak the standard language at your job? Like, your boss is all, ‘hey man, if you don’t speak––”’
“I’ll be the boss.”
“Oh?”
And with a little more prodding, Miya Osamu tells you about the restaurant chain he plans on opening after graduation, the slides about food additives left completely untouched.
The librarian knocks on your pod a few minutes before eleven to tell you they’re closing.
“Shit,” Osamu murmurs, running his hands through his hair. You’re still laughing about something he’d said before the librarian interrupted him–– one of his stories from high school–– and he thinks that you’ve completely forgotten that the reason you came to the library was to catch up on the material you were already behind on. And now you’re behind on that. But you look so carefree right now and, actually, you’re very pretty and you’ve got such a good heart and it’s a lot for him to process but he knows he just wants to see you happy a while longer. So Osamu just slumps back in his chair and laughs along with you.
He says your name as his chuckles grow softer. “It’s pretty late. How’re you getting home?”
“I’ve a bike,” you reply. It’s good for the environment and is a pretty solid form of exercise if you do say so yourself. Sometimes you just don’t feel like driving.
Osamu presses his lips in a thin line. Would it be too much to offer you a ride? “I can drive you home. It’s really not safe for you to be alone outside, especially near midnight. You can get your bike tomorrow. Or I’ll get it for you.”
He drives fast. Not the unsafe fast that speed demons drive at, but the kind of fast where you know he’s got some edge to his character. You bring it up to him–– especially since it’s nighttime, for god’s sake, he could hit something–– and all he does is remind you how there are lamps as bright as the sun lining the entire road to your dorm. And the fact that you live in the least accessible dorm on campus.
“A twenty-minute drive?” he’d exclaimed when he saw the GPS monitor.
“A bunch of roads are closed for construction. It’s a ten-minute bike-ride because I can cut through campus.” And suddenly feeling a little burdensome, you’d added, “Sorry. I can still bike––”
“No.” He’d held his hand out in front of you, gesturing for you to stay in the passenger’s seat. “It’s not a bother at all.” Because it wasn’t. Osamu was… happy. Not that he’d admit that.
“So this BMW,” you start in a teasing tone.
Osamu smirks. “A gift.”
“Can I guess from who?”
“Sure.”
“Atsumu.”
His brows rise. “Colour me impressed.” He hadn’t expected you to remember anything he’d said about Atsumu. Or maybe he had but told himself otherwise to lower his hopes.
“I’m smart like that.”
He snorts. “Not if you keep distracting me and using your review time to…” hang out with me, get to know me, tell me things about you… “…goof off.”
You grimace. “Yeah. Sorry about that.”
Osamu makes a turn down a familiar street. It dawns upon you that you're ten minutes away from your dorm and suddenly you wish he’d just make the wrong turn at the next intersection so that you could talk to him some more. It can even be about the health benefits of fish or the molecular makeup of kale–– you don’t mind. You just want to be around him longer.
“I think you’re really smart,” Osamu says quietly. “I think you’re not processing the readings because you’re distracted, or just not fully applying yourself. Obviously, last class’s slides are a different thing, since you were absent. But you really are smart. I’ve seen your papers.”
You bite your lip to hide your grin, feeling heat rush to your cheeks. “Thank you.” You look out the window, too jacked on dopamine to think straight. “I think I still need you, though.”
And that innocuous little sentence floats right out your mouth into the air, settling between you like a little wedge before either of you even realise it. Neither of you says anything. You marinate in the awkwardness before stuttering out a clarification. “To, um, to explain things. Y’know, since you’re, uh, so good at… explaining things.”
Osamu clears his throat and chuckles stiffly. There’s a slightly pink tinge to his cheeks. “Thanks,” he says, looking straight ahead. He can’t even look at you. Fuck. It’s so awkward. “I’ll try to keep… explaining things.” Fuck. What does that even mean?
A few uncomfortable minutes pass in silence. The night can’t end like this, you think. It can’t when everything else had gone so well. You still have to see him for a few more months. “Did you know,” you start, catching Osamu’s attention, “that Jack’s Diner has a location in Italy?”
“Oh?” he asks, making the final turn to the street where your dorm is. He actually hadn’t.
“Yeah. I asked the owner about the chain a while back. Have you ever been to Italy?”
Osamu shakes his head. “I’ve been to Paris, though. To see a friend. He’s a chocolatier.”
Now, if Osamu had been your friend, you would’ve said something like well, let’s go to Italy together, except he’s not. He’s your TA and you’ve been reminded that enough tonight. So instead, you say, “When you open that restaurant of yours in Italy, let me know.”
“That’s gonna take a while,” he laughs. He appreciates how you said ‘when’, though. And he tucks that little bit of confidence you have in him somewhere deep in his mind so that it doesn’t get lost.
“Isn’t that just seven hours?” you shrug, grinning. Osamu’s BMW pulls up outside your dorm and parks as he marvels at what you just said. You’re amazing. You unbuckle your seatbelt and turn to face your driver.
“Thank you for driving me,” you say, offering him a smile.
“Yeah,” he replies.
You stretch out your hand. With a puzzled look on his face, Osamu grabs it and shakes it. Firmly. You can’t help but notice how nice his hands are. Calloused for sure, but they feel nice.
“Goodnight, Osamu.”
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
He watches you jog into the building before driving away. And it’s like you’ve possessed his car or something because the smell of your shampoo and perfume is everywhere and it’s too much but it’s also not enough at the same time and he can feel your palm against his as he spins the steering wheel to make a turn and for the first time in his life he doesn’t turn on the radio to fill the silence in his car. Osamu replays everything you said in his head.
But he especially thinks about that part where you said you need him.
Weeks melt into months. You turn in essays after essays for Food Chemistry I, each coming back with detailed commentary in an all-too-familiar blue scrawl. All your other classes go well–– extremely well, actually. You might just end the semester with a 4.0 if Food Chem doesn’t fuck you over. Isla still tags you in memes on Instagram. You still tell her about everything that happens with Osamu.
Speaking of.
“That’s the wrong equation,” he says behind your ear as he settles in the seat beside you. The sound of his low voice so close to your ear sends a small shiver down your spine. “You gotta switch the hydrogens.” Osamu knocks on your skull lightly. “What’s goin’ on up in there? Ya got somethin’ on your mind?”
You laugh and elbow him in the side. “Shut up, ‘Samu.” He’d told you during one of his office hours that he’d gone by that nickname because he had a teammate with a foreign name in high school. It sounded so cool, he’d said, grinning.
I think Osamu sounds pretty cool already, you’d teased.
And he’d replied, Let’s trade. I like yours, you like mine, why not share?
You teeter on the line between friends and less-than-friends and, oddly enough, more-than-friends. Sometimes you still play it safe. Sometimes he pauses between texts and real-time conversations, no doubt to scrap an instinctive reply for something more “professional”. Sometimes you say things that make him look at you with the ghost of a smile at the corners of his lips. Sometimes he calls Atsumu to scream about you.
“S’not a no,” Osamu points out. He’s dressed in a black sweater and grey trousers today. You’re suddenly reminded of how the weather’s been getting colder when someone opens the door to the university café and lets in a gust of chilly autumn air.
“Okay,” you admit, setting down the pencil. “I just… don’t really feel prepared for this next test.”
Osamu frowns and looks down at your worksheet. “Your process is correct, though.”
“Right, but… I don’t know. I’ve just not been feeling great about myself lately,” you laugh, looking down at your feet. “Food Chem’s the toughest class I’ve ever taken. And remember how I completely embarrassed myself in that class discussion last week? It’s not really making me feel like I belong here.”
“Imposter syndrome,” Osamu remarks.
“Correct-o.”
He says your name softly and puts a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Maybe you’re not the smartest, but you’re definitely smart. And you belong here. I’ve seen your papers. They’re just as great as anyone else’s and I don’t hand out compliments for nothin’. You’re gonna do some great things but ya can’t improve if you ever give up.” Osamu searches your eyes for a sign of your understanding.
There’re a lot of things you want to say but you don’t know how to put them into words. “Can I hug you?” you finally ask.
Osamu doesn’t even think about it. “Of course.”
He feels you smile against his chest and wonders if you can feel his heart beat faster.
Isla camps out in your dorm as finals come around the corner.
“I don’t understand shit!” she wails, throwing her notebook into the air.
“Isles, it’s okay,” you laugh, slipping out of your chair and walking over to her nest in the corner. “You gotta chill, dude.”
“Not fair! I didn’t have a hunk holding my hand through this course all semester,” she retorts, humour glittering in her dark eyes. “I had the Organic Chemistry Tutor and his accent’s cute enough but, girl, you had Miya Fucking Osamu!”
“You’re literally the worst.” You giggle and sit down beside her. “Tell me what you’re confused about. I’ll try to explain it to you.” The way Osamu does.
You text him that you’d channelled his brains later that night.
His reply comes seconds later. all you, einstein.
From: osamu
good luck on the exam
you’re going to kill it
To: osamu
would u like to divulge any… information about it? 😏 😏 😏
From: osamu
bye
To: osamu
i was kidding :(
From: osamu
fine. tip #1: write your name
To: osamu
not very helpful. 0/10
From: osamu
keep running your mouth and 0/10 is what your score’s going to be
i’m kidding
you got this, y/n
“Holy fuck,” Isla groans as you cross the street to head to lunch at Jack’s. “If you don’t see me next semester it’s because I’ve gotten my grade back and decided to drop out.”
“What would you do?” you ask, amused.
“Maybe move to New Zealand. Raise some sheep. Marry a hot, blond shepherd and fuck off to a cliffside cottage.”
“Solid plan.”
“What about you?” she asks.
“What about me?”
“Remember that conversation we had at the start of the year? About your man?” The two of you reach another red light for pedestrians.
“We’re friends. He’s not my man,” you laugh. Though it pains you to. Something about being Miya Osamu’s friend doesn’t really sit right with you, but you don’t know how to not be his friend. You don’t know how to move out of the corner you’ve backed yourself into.
“But you wish he were! And now you can finally hit him with that ‘Hey, Osamu, I’ve been madly in love with you since the start of the semester, wanna fuck like rabbits and then open that store in Italy?’ and he’ll be all––”
A throat clears behind you. With wide eyes, the two of you turn around.
Holy fuck.
Miya Osamu stands behind you with his hands in his pockets and an enormous smirk on his face.
“He’ll be all what?” he asks, eyes fixed on you.
Isla murmurs an excuse and starts walking on her own to Jack’s.
“Um.” You swallow nervously and shrink in your coat. “You heard all of that, right?”
“Yep.” Osamu grins. He grins. He’s grinning. He’s smiling like he’s won the fucking lottery and you honestly don’t know what to do with that information.
“So, like,” you look down at the sidewalk and kick at a pebble, “what are your thoughts about that?” God, you could die. “‘Cause I know you’re a TA and it’d probably look pretty bad and I don’t want anything bad to happen to you because I like you and it’s cool if we just…”
Osamu interrupts you with a laugh. “My thoughts,” he says, “are that I want to kiss you.” His fingers lift your chin up. “What are your thoughts about that?”
Well, shit. “I think that’s pretty cool, yeah,” you breathe, eyelids fluttering shut as his face comes closer to yours.
He tastes like mint. And his lips move softly, slowly against yours like he’s savouring the moment. And then you feel his hands snake around your waist to pull you closer–– closer because you both are tired of forcing the distance between bodies that want to be near each other, closer because he’s thought about kissing you just like this for so long, closer because you remember the last time he’d touched you was three days ago and it was just a brush of his fingers against your arm and that feeling of wanting more haunted you for the entire night. But holy shit, Miya Osamu is kissing you. He’s kissing you.
And then he pulls away. His dark eyes flit over yours. “I,” he breathes, “I need your course load next semester.”
“What?” you ask, disbelief written all over your features, chest rising and falling as you try to steady your breathing. You just kissed, for God's sake, and he's––
“I need to know which courses not to apply to TA for,” he grins, cupping your face in his hands. “Can’t be teachin’ in a class with my girlfriend as a student.”
“So we’re official?” you ask, beaming.
“If you want,” Osamu replies with a smirk.
You grab the front of his coat and tug him down for another kiss. “Hell yeah, I want to be official.”
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𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐩𝐭. 𝟏
part 2
— haikyuu characters and what they’d do to help you sleep ♡
— feat. akaashi, atsumu, bokuto, hinata, kageyama, kita, osamu, suna, and tsukishima
— contains: gn!reader, established relationships, food mentions, slight manga spoilers, & slight crack bc that's just how it is <3
— a/n: this is for my beloved insomniacs, and here's my first headcanon !! LETSGOOO <3 i hope u enjoy and pls reblog if u liked it !! part 2 is up now╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
⇨ 𝐀𝐊𝐀𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈 reads you a book !! have you heard of his voice ?? SO soothing which will lull you to sleep <3 he asks you what book you want him to read but he sometimes insists on reading you stories you haven't heard before, just because he knows you'll love what he picks. sometimes would make fun of you and would search the web to read smut. he says it'll make you uncomfy and force you to sleep. you know the ones that are so explicit? yeah, we won't elaborate on that. don't ask me how he reads them with a straight face. "akaashi, please stop" "but this is really good" "yeah but i wouldn't be able to take you seriously" "then i'll read more passionately" "babe if you don't sTOP-"
⇨ 𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐔 is SO hyper. mans still has energy after volleyball practice and doesn't hesitate to ask you if you "wanna pillow fight?" ?? then proceeds to hit you before you even begin to talk. you gasp in shock as he hits your face so you try to hit him back, but the way he sways his pillow onto you is so strong which overpowers your will to do so. how strong is this man anyway ?? his last hit makes you fall back onto the bed, then he lays down beside you to trap you in his arms. "you tired?" "yes, 'tsumu, now let me go" "no" "you should've just asked if you wanted to cuddle so we can sleep" baby just wanted snuggies after all :')
⇨ 𝐁𝐎𝐊𝐔𝐓𝐎 asks "you can't sleep? mE TOO" then turns the TV on to watch a movie with you <3 he storms out the room before the movie starts and grabs a bowl of popcorn on the way back and you chose not to mind the ones that fell on the floor when he ran back to you. he likes cuddles and initiates to be the big spoon bc he wants you to be comfy. he'd pick a romcom so both of you would feel light-hearted before sleeping. but really, it's just an excuse for him to avoid watching horror movies with you, and you insist otherwise. "bo, why don't you want to watch a horror movie anyway?" "i'd be too scared to sleep" "but i'm here?" "i have you and me that i have to protect from ghosts ok" i can imagine him instantly standing up just when he hears a strange noise coming out of nowhere HFJSDGF A BIG BABY
⇨ 𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐀 is really excited to hear that you can't sleep because he was too hyper to do so. will ask you if you wanted to bike with him. bike ?? but he insists Miyagi's roads are safe to stroll around at night. he grabs the two bikes for you and both of you start to talk about life under the starry night <3 "what do you think of my spikes" "hinata, you ask me this literally everyday" "but you give me the best compliments!!" "fine, you're really good. but next time don't hit kageyama's head while serving" "you don't have to bring that up!!1!" all the cycling made you tired, so as you get back home, you feel drowsy and tired enough to fall asleep, and he is as well <3
⇨ 𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐘𝐀𝐌𝐀 tells you that it’s good to drink milk before sleeping. he actually does this and you notice that he’s fast asleep afterwards (when does he ever not drink milk anyways ??). whenever you tell him you can’t sleep, he makes sure that there’s a stock of milk cartons in the fridge just to make sure to never run out <3 “i can’t sleep” “how about you drink your milk” “but i'm gonna feel full” “well i’m not one who has a messed up sleep schedule, boke” he didn’t have to call you out like that 😔 but he got out of bed to pour you a glass of milk regardless <3
⇨ 𝐊𝐈𝐓𝐀 is really strict with you since he knows how sleep is important to you. he will NOT hesitate to wait for you to say that you can’t sleep. instead, he would give you lavender-scented candles and an eye mask before bedtime. he also cooks you boiled eggs since he says it helps with the melatonin, but will give you a tart cherry juice instead if you preferred not to eat <3 vERY responsible boyfriend, don't argue with me on this !! he'd also tell you to do the 4-7-8 breathing technique if you still can't sleep. "are you sure this will help?" "Obachan told me about this technique and it makes me fall asleep faster, try it" then proceeds to cuddle you whilst you do it. before you know it, you're already fast asleep !! although you'd have to ask him the next day about which helped you sleep faster <3
⇨ 𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔 insists to cook you something. you told him you were too hungry to sleep, so he brings you to the kitchen so you can watch him cook :') he says ramen is too heavy to digest at night so he cooks you miso soup instead !! this soup contains a lot of benefits so he's more than glad to offer you something that will be good for you <3 you watch him prepare all the ingredients before putting it altogether like magic. even if you don't like miso, the way he cooks it will be a life-changer for you because this man not only cooks, he cooks with passion !! you both devour the carefully-made soup then head back to your room to prepare to sleep <3 "did you like it?" "i did, 'samu, it tasted really good" "don't make yourself hungry before bedtime next time" but really, you just can't resist his perfect food recipes <3
⇨ 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐀 shows you his stolen pics of the team (especially atsumu LOL) which makes you both laugh so hard your cheeks and stomachs hurt !! he would also tell you the backstory of each picture so you would know the context. there are several questionable scenes, one of which is kita massaging his forehead in the background while atsumu flashes his butt to the team inside the locker room. another one is a blurred selfie with the team in the background dancing to tiktok songs. "and if you look closely, you'll see a disappointed aran" "i bet this was atsumu's idea" "yeah, especially this one song where you throw it back." both of you get exhausted with the laughing and cackling so you finally fall asleep afterwards, with his arm around your waist <3
⇨ 𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐀 gives you his giant dinosaur plushie. you’d be confused at first, because he doesn’t let anyone, not even yamaguchi, touch those plushies he cherishes very dearly. he actually has to choose since he has a ton of these in different dinosaur species. you know this, because he snuggles with different ones every night. you know that meme with the girlfriend sleeping with her 500 dollar four foot tall mareep? yep, that’s the sitch 😔 heart been broke so many times. BUT tsukishima is actually sweet enough to let you hold his plushies. “tsukki,, i can’t sleep” “here, have this T-rex” “but you don’t let anyone touch your plushies” “these help me sleep and it’s you anyways, take it” 🥺🥺🥺 then he insists to put the plushie between you both so he can cuddle it as well. tsukki said sharing is caring <3
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