#computer for my squirrel brain

[im-queen-of-the-black-forest]

Submitted for your approval; Even more of The Nameless Ghouls as unhinged quotes from my friends (or me).

Dew: Do you know what a cuck is? no? Then you won’t get the joke.

Cirrus: *trying to stay calm as the rest of the ghouls go FERAL* Not my circus not my monkeys, Not my circus not my monkeys, Not my circus not my- fuck this literally IS my circus and these ARE MY MONKEYS

Aether: NO! BAD! LEAVE THE SQUIRRELS ALONE!!

Sunny: *hugging Copia’s head to her chest* DONT YOU TALK TO ME OR MY SON EVER AGAIN

Copia: I am DEFINITELY older than you

Swiss:*playing a game that Dew recommended* Uhh Dew? Why am I on a rocket train?!

Aurora: *very muffled from down the hallway* THERE IS ONLY ONE U IN BLUETOOTH YOU FUCKING WALNUT

Phantom: How many points is “thug” worth?

Aurora: What do you even know about thugs?

Phantom: Absolutely nothing, question still stands

Cumulus: *playing Mario Cart against Swiss* *to the tune of the Chicken Dance* Badadadadadada Badadadadadada Badadadadadada *throws blue shell* GET FUCKIN REKT

Rain: *after trauma dumping on Sunny* You haven’t said anything, do you think I’m a bad person?

Sunny: no! I’m just an emotionally stunted potato.

Mountain: *trying on a pair of women’s jeans, to Cirrus* why are there STITCHES if there aren’t POCKETS?! What kind of monster puts fake pockets on things?! Where am I supposed to put all the weird things I find in the woods?!

And more Papas!

Copia: This week has been shit. My mental state is in the toilet and I’m not sure if I want to preemptively call off tomorrow and just fuck this week. I need to extract my brain and scrub it

Secondo: Sir this is a Wendy’s

Secondo: I just drove to four different fucking Wawa’s to get a fucking burrito after a shitty day and one place is out of tortillas, one is out of barbacoa and the other two are out of rice

I’m going to SCREAM.

Primo: LEE PACE IS 6’5 AND BUILT HE IS NOT A TWINK!

Terzo: 15 years since I met Mary in computer class and they brought me to sit with their usual lunch crowd *scoots to sit next to Copia* and there was someone hunched at the end of the lunch table, reading a book and studiously ignoring me. *places a hand on Copia’s head* and then I slowly turned you into an insane person!

Nihil: *whispering to Seestor* I don’t think he’s a registered nurse, he keeps slapping me and screaming.

Sister: *looks at the nurse who is definitely Dew in platform shoes and a terrible fake mustache* he looks trustworthy

#ghost band #shitghosting #incorrect ghost quotes #aether ghoul #dewdrop ghoul #swiss ghoul #mountain ghoul #rain ghoul #sunshine ghoulette #cirrus ghoulette #cumulus ghoulette #aurora ghoulette #phantom ghoul #papa terzo #papa secondo #papa nihil #papa primo #sister imperator #Birdie: Ace Reporter

[random-thought-depository]

Returning to the first aid discourse a bit, I think it might give an insight into how conservatism works.

I suspect that, by-in-large, the kind of people Chaumas is responding to here and here and here aren't talking from a position they reasoned themselves into. I suspect what happened is these people don't have home first aid kits and/or home fire extinguishers and/or serious wound care training because (more-or-less) nobody ever suggested to them that home first aid kits and/or home fire extinguishers and/or serious wound care training are things they should have, they spent their lives not thinking about this much, and then they encountered something they interpreted as a suggestion that their condition is shameful and they reacted by trying to defend their previously more-or-less unexamined condition. It's an example of a very common type of human behavior! It's not necessarily a bad heuristic; the world has a lot of people ready to give you some variant of "you owe me or my project your time, energy, resources, and/or obedience because [at least superficially reasonable-sounding argument] and you're a bad person if you resist my demands on you!" and resistance to that is part of a healthy memetic immune system.

I suspect this is how a lot of conservatism works.

Take opposition to ethical vegetarianism, for example. You need some pretty highfalutin cognition-intensive reasoning to invent an ideology of ethical vegetarianism. Or at least to invent a version of it that might be socially contagious; just being too empathetic toward animals and/or too squeamish to kill them might not require much intellect, but by itself that would just be an individual quirk; to make ethical vegetarianism really socially contagious you'd need an idea of morality abstract and flexible enough to do philosophy with it and a system of communication sophisticated enough to encode complex abstract ideas, and you'd need a pretty fancy brain for that. I think inventing an ideology of ethical vegetarianism would probably be beyond the cognitive capacity of chimpanzees (and even if a chimpanzee could imagine such a thing in the privacy of their own thoughts, they almost certainly could not communicate it to other chimpanzees). But chimpanzees hunt monkeys and eat them! In human ancestors, killing animals to eat them probably emerged from reinforcement learning long before their brains got big enough to invent an ideology of ethical vegetarianism:

Let's say you're building a squirrel, and you want the squirrel to know locations for finding nuts.  Individual nut trees don't last for the thousands of years required for natural selection.  You're going to have to learn using proteins.  You're going to have to build a brain. Protein computers and sensors can learn by looking, much faster than DNA can learn by mutation and selection.  And yet (until very recently) the protein learning machines only learned in narrow, specific domains.  Squirrel brains learn to find nut trees, but not to build gliders - as flying squirrel DNA is slowly learning to do.  The protein computers learned faster than DNA, but much less generally.

Our ancestors were probably catching animals, crushing their skulls with rocks, and eating that tasty fatty and protein-rich meat long before they had the cognitive capacity to imagine an ideology of ethical vegetarianism. The first human-ish entity to imagine a notion of ethical vegetarianism likely experienced it as an unpleasant novel idea that threatened to reframe an unquestioned normal activity in their life as something bad and forbidden, to take away one of their life's pleasures or make them feel bad about enjoying it. And I think that's exactly how a lot of present day humans first encounter the notion of ethical vegetarianism today, and much anti-vegetarian sentiment is a reaction to that experience!

Ethical vegetarianism probably started out as an ideology. Carnism probably didn't. There are ideologies of carnism, but they're responses to ideologies of ethical vegetarianism. It's only when the unexamined default of "meat is tasty so I like to eat it" comes under philosophical questioning and attack that counter-ideologies that attempt to make a moral case for carnivory are formulated.

And I suspect that's how a lot of conservatism works; a lot of conservative ideology is attempts to defend with reason practices that people never reasoned themselves into (neither individually nor collectively).

If there's some truth to the opinion that conservative ideas tend to be especially stupid, I think it has something to do with this. A lot of conservatism is attempts to defend with reason practices that people didn't reason themselves into (either products of evolution, as in the vegetarianism example, or products of human cognitive biases and/or game theory equilibria); a lot of what it's trying to defend is dumb and amoral in the way the Blind Idiot God is dumb and amoral, and they can't stop the fundamental stupidity and amorality from showing through the rationalizations they paper over it.

Corey Robin said that the central experience of political reaction is having power, experiencing that power being subject to questioning and attack, and attempting to defend and re-assert that power in response. I'd offer a complimentary formulation: a central experience of conservatism is doing something, thinking of it as normal, encountering a novel idea that it's somehow bad and you should feel bad about it and have an obligation to change your behavior, and scrambling for arguments to defend an aspect of your way of being that you'd previously never questioned much.

#people are complicated #my big ideas #politics

[ladyvader23]

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic?

46. Do you prefer writing on your phone or on a computer (or something else)? Do you think where you write affects the way you write?

47. If “Darth Vader’s Favorite Podcast” was a pair of shoes, what kind would it be? Describe the shoes.

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

49. What are you currently working on? Share a few lines if you’re up for it!

Oh shit I just got this message, haha! Sorry! 

45. I think I’ve learned to write what I want to write, and not worry so much about if others like it. As a result, I think I’ve produced things that others do want to read, even if it is a bit out there (like come on, Darth Vader Goes to School was SUPER out there, and yet it was a ton of fun to write and people really enjoyed it!) When I get comments from people who don’t like what I wrote, I don’t take it personally and continue writing what I want to write regardless. It’s so freeing! 

46. Computer. 100%. My brain space is very different when I’m on my computer. It signals that I need to give my writing my full attention. My phone is constantly getting messages and notifications, and I would have way more grammatical mistakes for a beta to fix. I just don’t think I could produce something I really like on my phone, or it would at least take me a lot longer to make it something to be proud of in editing. 

47. Oh jeez. Uh....how about LED light up shoes? The podcast fic is centered around digital interaction of the most bizarre form, so I feel like having just. Obnoxiously bright LED tennis shoes would fit that aesthetic. 

48. So you know how lots of people have guilty pleasure fics that they don’t admit aloud? My last fic was a guilty pleasure Baulders Gate 3 fic, sooooo I’m going to instead recommend SPARKS by @spell-cleaver because it’s good and I love it 

 49. Actually I’ve been slowly working on The Forgotten Outpost! My brain is running around like a lost squirrel, so it’s a slow process unfortunately. But here’s a few lines! 

“Black rage fueled him as he held the monster with the Force. Even as the creature tried to fight against his grip with its own cold, dark power, Vader did not release it. He had had enough of this planet and its monsters constantly trying to feed on his son.“

[sesshy380]

I love how I have every intention to be productive and get some chores done around the house, but the squirrel in my brain has other ideas.

How my morning is going:

get up because bladder says so

let dog out of kennel, push power button to pc tower on the way to stand outside with dog for his own bladder relief

come back in and start coffee

start laundry while coffee is brewing

sit down at computer and get it logged in and check for updates

start laundry while update is going

get coffee and sit back down at computer, open docs open tumblr

scroll scroll scroll, copy rp reply to docs so i can brainstorm what comes next

start laundry decide it's finally warm enough out i can open the curtains for sunlight without losing a bunch of heat

start laundry sit back down and open docs scroll through tumblr

start laundry

open docs make post on tumblr about how my squirrel brain works

#random stuff #my adhd squirrel brain #at least i finally started laundry

[ysabelmystic]

Since getting an IUD I’m starting to legitimately prefer my period to the ovulation period because my brain cannot naturally compute the urge to fornicate

Allegedly, I should be horny

Instead, I am unbearably warm, I can’t sleep, I have the attention span of a squirrel, and I’m fucking pissed off.

Fucking hate it here. I’d rather be sleepy and achy than this.

[oregano-gremlin]

a, e, i, k, for the fic asks!!

A: Of the fanfic you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

oooh um... probably this one? i feel like i tend to have a hard time conveying emotion in my writing, but i really like how the tone of this one turned out. my more melancholy than super angsty tendencies worked pretty well in it, i'd say.

E: What character do you identify with most?  Is there a certain fic of yours that captures these qualities particularly well?

the two characters who i think i relate to/project on the most in my writing are probably childe from genshin impact and dave strider from homestuck. in regards to childe, i've written and posted a little under 80k words of fic featuring him either as the protagonist or love interest, and my favorite study of his character specifically would have to be this fic. the one i linked earlier i also think i wrote him well in, but he's not the pov character of that one.

on the other hand, i've only posted one pretty short fic about dave, but i've got something like 10k words more squirreled away on my computer as part of a longer wip.

as for my favorite parts of their characters, i think they're actually kind of similar- self-worth issues and self-destructive behavior contrasted with a relatively cheerful personality, and also being completely abandoned by your family/parental figure(s) when you needed them most but refusing to see your treatment as anything but what you deserved and continuing to support them anyways. for childe specifically, i also like the potential for catholic guilt and religious themes, for dave, i like his canon arc about queerness and overcoming toxic masculinity/homophobia taught to him by bro a lot.

I: How many fandoms have you written in?  Do you have a favorite?

posted to my ao3, i've written death note, genshin and homestuck. i've been on a homestuck kick lately, but my biggest issue trying to write for that fandom is constantly doubting myself in regards to whether or not i am correctly understanding the way that things work in canon. still, the brain worms crave to be let out, so i do my best lol.

K:  Do you have a guilty pleasures in fic (reading or writing)?

any tropes that force characters to do relationship-y things before they're actually in a relationship (or before they confess). fake dating, only one bed, arranged marriages etc, they've all tons of fun. i personally haven't really written much of this, but i would definitely be interested in trying my hand at it in the future.

#thanks for the ask! #sorry this turned into a bit of a wall lol #i got carried away talking about blorbos :')

[desolateice]

☉

what do you do when you get stuck writing? (from this ask game) Rubber Ducky Sometimes I just complain and talk about whatever the issue is and it works itself out while I'm talking. I think that's the rubber ducky method, which is why I've got a bazillion little plushies around so I can snag one and talk to it when I don't want to bother people. Switch WIP's. Once upon a time I tried to complete fanfics before starting a new one, but that was fine back when I wrote one fic for a fandom and then peaced out. Now I write a lot and want to write more so I juggle them around when i get stuck or realize I need to do a lot more research (cough the Johnny/Tommy fic cough) Sometimes by the time I recrack open the fic it's a lot easier. But it helps if I left myself notes. Skipping around using brackets So there's this idea that you should use the things you put off using, eat the things you want to eat and stop saving things for special moments. Which I suck at. I say this with a bright pink jackolantern on my desk full of treats I've squirreled away that I'm saving for a moment to try them or as a notebook hoarder.

But I've gotten better about this with writing. If there's a scene I really want to write I'll put brackets for whatever I need to come back and do so that I don't forget it, though sometimes I do this when I'm super tired and don't want to forget my ideas [Johnny and Daniel drive to Jersey and Johnny learns what a pain in the ass driving in winter is and Daniel is full of himself about it but also forgets he's not used to driving in a city/let alone on ice anymore and they safely crash into a snow drift] I dunno, something like that and then skip to whatever happened next that I wanted to write. It kind of helps and it seems like it wouldn't be easier to go back and fill in those gaps, but sometimes it is. And sometimes when I think there aren't any it's a pain because I thought it was done and it wasn't 😂 Do something else [shower] 🚿

Sometimes you gotta do something else physically and let your brain wander. I cross-stitch and embroider sometimes and I'll do this repetitive thing that requires me to physically be doing something and sometimes it'll jog something in the fic I got stuck with. Another good one is generally taking a walk but I'm like so bad at that, I'm not good with just wandering around without purpose 😅 I want to go somewhere and look at something or have someone to talk to so it doesn't quite work for me, but doing the dishes or cleaning or cooking or my tried and true method, taking a shower generally does it. I shower probably way too much that it's now like part of my daily routine like having a cup of coffee in the morning, taking a shower before bed lets me relax and also figure out whatever was stuck. Go go go pomodoro! 🍅 Sometimes people work really well under pressure and I...oh sometimes I work really well under pressure. 😂💀 So a pomodoro is a little tomato kitchen timer, and essentially you time yourself. You can pick the length and you just focus completely on that one task until your time is up. Like here: https://pomofocus.io/ is a timer that focus's on this task. It generally works better if you have someone else doing it with you. So a writer whose interview I watched last year said that every morning she and her friend set their computers down on their kitchen tables, call one another and sync their timers and write. And I find when I do this, the sort of stressors of that timer makes me skip all the stuff I generally worry about. Spelling, grammar, things I'd normally puzzle over that slow down my writing and I just go go go. It also stops me from like diving down rabbit holes for research which I do...frequently. 😂 Sometimes it's also called sprinting. Thank you for the ask! 💖

#writing asks #asks

[ionicslime]

Excuse me waiter my full name is,

Ionic "im already in cool mode" "tutorial character" "i will get a color role if you beat the path of pain in hollow knight" " @king-of-fuffies do radiant gruz mother" "ADMIN WATCH DAWGS HES TRY TO CHANGE MY COLOR WITHOUT MY CONSENT" "THERE WAS NO BASEMENT! IT WAS THE SECOND FLOOR OF MY HOUSE!" "i don't know what a bong is. WHAT THE FUCK IS A BONG" "there should be a suggestion box on this server. THEY CALL IT THE LITTERBOX" "im going to take an emergency shit" "YOU FORGOT TO PICK UP THE LEGO ON THE FLOOR" "i was the best man AND the pope" "does this look like the face of mercy" "you own him therefore you are responsible for them" "the" "you are the father" "if im a moth do i deal 2 masks of damage" "my body is ready" "if it needs a color role you'll never take me alive" "it was funny but also" "extremely" "extremely" "extremely" "extremely" "cursed" "carleah, not pillar john" "he soaks up more damage that way" "everyone has a horror game dopelganger" "Ruck" "Fuffy get your man’s, He exploded" "I need to find Carleah and steal their liver to take their ability to open the thousand-one year door" "Only then Keane McZupp will explode turning into a bagel at 3 am after ordering the among us happy meal" "ethereal toasters are the only thing that can control toast" "all toasters have secret potato slots" "he is several parallel universes behind" "the internet is a giant mcdonalds" "I’m a ocean" "i cant even throw you, much less pick you up" "he didn't know FedEx had a stand" "funny words magic man" "nothing to see here" "Za Waldo!" "Remember besties, don’t blow stuff in peoples faces unless it’s air kisses, or darts!" "fuffy left me in the car for 4 hours" "There are no mistakey wakeys" "Fuffy I’m like 300% sure you are a pony" "He was pouring out lemonade into the abyss" "**Fuffy was ejected. One Sussy Boy remains**" "The abyss was thirsty" "A funny" "I am not safe for clothes driers" "Can your wall eat a lawn mower" "squirrels do not die at terminal velocity. also theres lizards that fire blood from their eyes as a defense mechanicism" “I bowl like my sexuality: Not straight” "short" "You have 5 minutes to live" "IM A FUCKING CAR KEANE" "\*I mean edgy I mean edgy I mean edgy I mean Edgy" "What is this mario party" "no" "brain issue" "i even crashed your computer" “Seduce the Skeleton!” “Kentucky Fried [REDACTED]” "im scared of my own pasta power sometimes" "He becomes noise pizza tower" "Anything is possible, with the power of Crazy Dave’s Twinkysdinkys" "he eats the golf ball and dies" “Everything is a weapon if you hit someone hard enough” "Happy tale of under unde of tale tdat" "fuffy brain melt. he die" "why are you in my chem textbook" "where is the dinnerbone cat." "Everything is a table." "Was schmoving too hard and bust my ass." "That was just my normal attack. Deploying Unexplainable Gifs" "I am immune to gachas. And they’re immune to me." "Did you know you don’t have organs. The constitution I wrote myself says so." "Go to Burger King" "My attack was so powerful discord crashed" "Fuffy open the door I have 3 sad poems and one sparkler" "If you rearrange final you get fianl" "stop watching cringe and beat the shit out of every boss." “Alright, you’re getting stepped on.” "i am the bio-weapon in youe walls" "*Hello my name is now temporarily humphrey*" "Also I beat up a toaster today," "we got a job to do" Slime

[dragonmuse]

Can we get Pete visiting Callahan investigations and just seeing more of Izzy, how he works with other people, besides Lucius?

(we can!)

"Got stuck on security footage," Izzy said in lieu of hello as he opened the door. "We've got at least a half-hour more ahead of us. Didn't you get my text?"

"Must've come through when I was underground," Pete shrugged. "It's fine, left plenty of time to get there. I can hang. Hi Jim, Hi Read."

"Pete save us," Read groaned and dropped her head into her arms. "My eyes are going cross."

"You've only been here since noon," Jim grumped. "I've been here all day."

"Who could imagine that you'd have to ever work at work?" Izzy rolled his eyes at both of them and sat back down at his desk.

"I could help?" Pete offered. "Depending on what you're doing."

"Just looking for a guy who may or may not have showed up at this place over the course of twelve hours on six cameras," Read said, head still down, so it came out a little muffled. "You are welcome to it.

"He was there," Izzy's eyes were flickering over the cameras. "Leave Pete alone, this is a paying gig, not a volunteer operation."

"I really don't mind, not like I'm doing anything," Pete glanced between them.

"No," Read sat up and sighed. "He's right, I am actually earning money. Blech. Death to capitalism."

"I like money," Jim muttered and clicked at something a little viciously on their screen.

"I could...get coffee?" Pete offered. "Maybe some muffins or something?"

Three people went very very quiet.

"Oh fuck, please," Read squeaked out.

"Croissant," Jim said longingly.

Izzy sighed, "Yeah, coffee would be a damn mission of mercy."

So Pete got their orders and then the very specific request to get it from the place a block away and not the one across the street which was apparently 'overpriced dishwater' according to Izzy and 'kind of burnt' according to Read. Jim did not weigh in, watching the footage with renewed intensity.

The place a block away was ordinary enough, smelled good though. Pete put in the order, adding a coffee and scone on for himself.

Izzy: bring me back the receipt, I'll pay you back

Pete: don't care. barely anything

Izzy: tax write off for me. anyway it's not nothing.

Pete: ok. they've got pre-packaged stuff here, sure you don't want anything to eat?

Izzy: no

Izzy: thanks

His return was greeted by a cheer from Read and Jim's grunt of thanks upon receiving their desired pastry. Izzy took his paper cup and promptly pressed it to his forehead.

"Don't think that's how you get it into your bloodstream," Pete offered, resettling with his own purchases.

"Keeps the brain loose," Izzy muttered, but he did bring it down to his mouth for an actual sip.

"Boss?" Jim asked after another few minutes during which Pete had decimated half his croissant.

"Yeah?" Izzy didn't look away from his screen.

"Camera 5 glitches out at 2 AM, gone for...fifteen minutes."

"Shit," Izzy tapped at his computer then hissed. "Read, does 8 cover any of 5?"

"Some, it doesn't get the door, but you can see most of the hallway. I'll scan back, give me a sec."

"I'm going to track back 3," he decided. "Jim, try to see if anything happens on either side of the glitch. Any movement at all."

Pete ate a bite of his scone and sipped his coffee very quietly. The tension had ratcheted up.

"Nothing before," Jim let him know, "Tracking to the end now."

"There's movement on 8!" Read called out. "It's not a person though, looks like...huh. Squirrel."

"Fuck," Jim and Izzy chorused.

Silence resumed. Pete leaned back in the chair. The view behind Izzy was decent, mostly filled with the building across the street, but there was some skyline visible on the edges. The big plant in the corner had a single ornament hanging from it. A glass ball with a duck sitting inside.

"Hear me out," Read said into the crackling quiet. "What if we just lied to the client. Say he never showed. They can't prove otherwise."

Pete winced, prepared for Izzy to chew them out, but the man sighed, "Don't tempt me."

"C'mon boss," Jim got in on it. "What the fuck do we care?"

Izzy wavered, then shook his head. "It's just the last few minutes, we can nail it out. Buckle down."

"Fiiiine," Read huffed.

Pete hid a smile in his cup of coffee. Apparently long term exposure to Read and Jim had worn some of the edges off the man. Kind of cute, if you weren't dumb enough to say so out loud.

"Wait!" Read got to her feet and went over to Izzy. "Boss, check 3, timestamp is 3:38am."

Izzy clicked rapidly and then sucked in a breath, "When did that car show?"

"Not sure, but I caught a flash of jacket. Jim?"

"Yeah, yeah, I've got it up....yeah, that's him! He's not going in though, just standing around.....and then goes back to the car. That's why he didn't show on the security feed, he never went inside."

"He drop anything?" Then Read and Izzy were both on their feet, circling around to Jim.

Pete turned in his chair. This was better than Law and Order.

"Hold on," Jim pressed something. "There."

"That's it," Izzy was grinning and he reached over to slap Read on the back. "Good job. Get the hell out of here. Jim, screenshot and send, then you're free too."

"Yes!" Read didn't need to be told twice, racing back to her desk, grabbing up her coat and phone. "You want me to feed Sweeney tonight, right?"

"Yeah," Izzy confirmed.

"Can I give him treats?"

"Not sure how I can stop you," he grumbled.

"Where are we meeting in the morning?" asked Jim.

"I'll text you the address. It's a meet and greet, want to go fly solo?"

They considered and then to Pete's surprise, shook their head. "Ewan sent them our way, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Probably closer to your age. They'll take you more seriously than me."

Izzy weighed that, then nodded, "Probably. All right, I'll do the intros then you can lead it."

Within five minutes, it was just Pete and Izzy left. Izzy heaved a sigh as he shut off his computer.

"We can skip it," Pete offered.

"Nah, just need to look away from the screen for a bit."

"Kind of surprised you wanted to go in the first place," Pete admitted.

"Why?"

Which was a good question and Pete considered his answer until they were out in the hall.

"You don't usually go in for light-hearted stuff. When we first met, I kind of thought you were against fun on principle."

"Turns out that's called clinical depression," Izzy shrugged. "Anyway, I always liked cars and chaos."

When Pete had been bequeathed the tickets from John, he'd told Lucius about them without much hope and had been summarily rejected. Then told Maybe ask, Iz. He might go for it. Pete had texted him, preparing for the curt no that met many suggestions aimed in that direction.

It had not been forthcoming. Instead he got a what time?

So here they were.

Off to a Monster Truck Jam. Life was certainly long and strange.

Izzy was, unsurprisingly, a loud viewer which made Pete want to yell too, so by the time Lucius texted demanding a selfie, they were both flushed and sweating.

Lucius: nice. maybe I should come next time.

Pete considered that, watching Izzy chew on a straw with extreme prejudice then jump to his feet as Gravedigger crushed a car.

"Fuck 'em up!" He shouted.

Pete: love you, babe. you're not invited.

Lucius: Love you too! Glad you guys are having fun.

"Bet you Wonder Woman scores higher."

"How much?" Izzy cut a glance over at him.

"Next round of beers."

"You're on."

#leda house and the kraken verse #ficlet #pete black #izzy hands

[negative-speedforce]

uncommon questions for Siv, Jay, Esme, Cassandra, and E-2002 Eobard #s 1, 2, 3, 8, 9, 10, 11, 13, 15, 19, 20, 22, 24, 27, 43 and B, D, I, and J (sorry it's so many lol)

1: What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

Siv: Depends on their mood. If they're zoned out, they can just sit there staring into space for 20+ minutes. However, most of the time, Siv's ADHD ass can't sit still for more than 2 or 3 minutes.

Jay: He has the attention span of a squirrel on cocaine, so probably like 5 minutes or so.

Esme: After about 5 minutes, she'll start fidgeting and singing to herself.

Cassandra: About 10 minutes, then she gets bored and goes and finds something to do.

Eobard: He can sit completely still for hours and it is creepy. Siv, as a kid, has mistaken him for dead because he just sat there, completely still, staring into nothing for like, an hour.

2: How easy is it for your character to laugh?

Siv: Usually, her laughs are ironic, so if you hear Siv laugh when you've done something to piss them off, RUN. However, a genuine laugh is not impossible, although much more unlikely (show her a picture of Delilah being silly and she'll 100% laugh)

Jay: It's pretty easy to make him laugh. Just say/do something funny and you'll probably get at least a chuckle or a snort out of him.

Esme: Depends on how drunk she is. If she's sober, it has to be actually really funny, however, Drunk!Esme will laugh at just about anything.

Cassandra: Good luck, unless your name is Jay.

Eobard: Good luck. It's not happening.

3: How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)

Siv: falls asleep scrolling through their phone

Jay falls asleep snuggling Cassandra.

Cassandra: reads to fall asleep

Esme: falls asleep with headphones on

Eobard: falls asleep on a dime, usually with one or both eyes partially open.

8: What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child

Siv: Stop fighting and cursing at the other children.

Jay: Get off his computer

Esme: Do her homework

Cassandra: Stop trying to boss around and micromanage her siblings

Eobard: Stop falling asleep sitting up with his eyes open (please stop, it's very creepy)

9: Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word?

Siv swears like a sailor, and Eobard hasn't been able to stop them ever since they first learned the "no-no words".

Jay doesn't swear much, and he didn't start swearing until high school.

Esme swears a lot (not quite as much as her sister), and her first swear word was when she was 4, Tess dropped her keys in a puddle and said "Oh-" and Esme finished with "Shit!"

Eobard doesn't swear much except for the occasional "fuck!" when something goes really wrong, and he barely remembers his childhood due to having changed the timeline so many times.

10: What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

Siv: I'm nothing like him

Jay: I'd never compromise what I believe in

Cassandra: Dark magic isn't dangerous

Esme: I got a 1340 on my SAT

Eobard: I love you

11: How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?

Siv: Pretends she understands

Jay: Pretends to understand, asks Cassandra later

Cassandra: Pretends to understand, asks Jay later

Ember: Asks for clarification

Eobard: Depends on which one will manipulate you into giving him what he wants.

13: How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach?

Siv: ignores it until it goes away

Jay: Asks Cassandra to take care of it

Cassandra: Asks Jay to take care of it

Esme: Turns any nearby object into an impromptu back scratcher

Eobard: VERY CAREFULLY phases through himself so he can reach the spot on the other side.

15: How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

Siv: Has no brain to mouth filter whatsoever, whatever you hear is what just went through their mind.

Jay: Thinks before he speaks

Cassandra: Retools what she's going to say repeatedly until she knows it'll have the right effect.

Esme: Depends on how drunk she is. Sober Esme thinks before speaking, Drunk Esme does not.

Eobard: Is the king of thinking before speaking. Will rehearse something until he knows he can manipulate someone with it.

19: What is their favorite number?

Siv: 666

Jay: 69

Esme: 420

Cassandra: 21 (the age she met Jay)

Eobard: 129 (police code for 'requesting back up' which is quite often any one who defies him's last words)

22: How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? 

Siv pulls away from people when she's jealous. They don't like being reminded of what they can't have.

Jay attempts to stay calm and compartmentalize when he's jealous, until he can talk to his therapist.

Cassandra gets a little bit possessive, but she manages to keep this trait in check.

Esme pretends to not feel jealousy, but inside, she seethes towards the person she's jealous of.

Eobard "Possesive Petty Bitch" Thawne gets so possessive over people that he's willing to kill for it. Literally.

24:  Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom? 

Siv: They're very open about their sex life, mainly because she's a gremlin and it makes people uncomfortable. However, she's also very private about the nitty gritty details, and will only share that with their current partner.

Jay: He'll talk nasty with Cassandra and no one but Cassandra.

Cassandra: Nope. Not going to happen. (unless you're Jay)

Esme: Is very open about her sex life and enjoys letting her friends know what she likes so they can have better sex.

Eobard: Sweetie, he doesn't even speak about it with himself.

27: What causes them to feel dread? 

Siv: Bad memories repeating.

Jay: The threat of losing someone.

Cassandra: Failing everyone.

Esme: Being tied down to one place/person.

Eobard: His plans failing.

43: If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so? 

Siv: "Girls. Boobs. Women Pretty."

Jay: "Technically, I'm Pan, but I like to say I'm Cassandra-sexual."

Esme: "Spicy straight"

Cassandra: "I'm heterosexual aromantic. Now get back to work."

Eobard: "I don't talk about that." (he's very repressed and gay)

B: What inspired you to create them?

Siv was created because of an assignment my therapist gave me- journalling to process my own trauma and my complicated feelings towards my mother.

Jay was created because I needed a "Sam" to Siv's "Frodo". Someone pure of heart that could pull her back from the darkness.

Cassandra was originally just "Jay's Girlfriend", but now she's one of my most important characters lol.

Esme is a narrative foul to Siv. She's free-spirited and extroverted, where Siv is reclusive and cranky.

Eobard's just... Eobard. He's an asshole, he's a terrible dad, he needs a reality check, etc.

D: Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

Siv and Cassandra (version 1)

Current version:

Jay, Esme, and Eobard have always looked fairly the same.

I: Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe?

Absolutely, though I do have a Vampire AU that I'm writing (sexy lesbian vampires? why not?)

J: Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character?

I play somewhat fast and loose with canon, and though I try to stay as close as possible to the canon timeline, if there's something I don't like or I think is stupid (e.g. the Lightning Lightsabers) I'll throw that out.

#ask revan #oc shit #vexic :D #Holy shit this one took forever to finish lol

[icewindandboringhorror]

Daily Log 8

Trying out (probably just temporarily) making short daily-ish notes about things, in an attempt to see if it helps me be more reflective or productive lol.

Activities: Dr's appointment early in the morning, then had to go to the bank and pick up one other thing after. Of course since minimal exertion somehow makes me exhausted for the entire day because of the many wretched curses upon my physical form, I didn't accomplish much else lol..

Took pictures of the avocado pit carved items. Not sure when I'll have the time to edit and post them.

FINALLY did plant the Nasturtiums, and a few other plants! I dislike most "yardwork", especially pulling weeds, because it's hard for me to tell what counts as a "weed" or not, since some of these apparent "weeds" are also pretty flowers and I feel bad for destroying them. A while ago at a relative's house they were doing yardwork and I saw a pile of some of these "weeds" on the ground, so I took a few home to try and replant them. I finally got around to putting them in real containers today, and most of them seem to be doing well so far.

Unfortunately the 'forget me not' flowers (some of my favorites because of blue being one of my favorite colors) never seem to transplant well, after multiple attempts at saving them from people's yards and thinking I've dug down deep enough to get all the roots this time and etc. etc. , they just seem to kind of flop and die after replanting them.. epic gardening fail.. misery and sadness . so on and so forth

Edited next sims let's play video for like barely 15 minutes.

Thought about a few ideas for the story I think I mentioned in the first Daily Log about a doctor and magical experiments. :3c

Had a lot of what seems like nerve pain?? or something?? in my arms radiating down to my fingertips and wrists (likely something to do with my shoulder blades/chest/back of upper neck/shoulder area being perpetually problematic), so I didn't do a lot of work with my hands or computer stuff for long.. stimky

Sketched out one of the border sections for the tapestry painting thing, but really Thought About It more than Did Any Tangible Progress.

Washed like two miserable little dishes in my cringe fail kitchen sink with my loser lame achy fingers and hands

Notable sights: SAW SOME GEESE when walking past a park today!!!! I rarely ever see geese, mostly just ducks and common birds and squirrels around here. There were also some interesting plants I briefly got to look at in a store on the way home from my appointment. I don't even want much in life (yet it all seems so unattainable for someone in my situation lol), like I don't want to have a mansion or anything, but just a modest little house with a small yard would be so cool.. I would love to actually curate a real permanent garden instead of everything having to be in pots all the time. connection across time with my very likely peasant ancestors, looking up to the sky like 'ah, if only I were part of the landowning class'

Goals moving forward: SUPER focus on social activities, finding new friends in the places I want to move, communicating with ones I have, because I keep ignoring this for weeks and I am never going to have a social support network if I don't actually build one lol.. Living in a broad interconnected society where social tethers are pivotal for survival (unless you're rich - and even then, social connections likely help substantially in career and etc. - most currently rich people had rich parents, etc. etc.) is so antithetical to my hermit nature.. aughhh....Why so inherently difficult for brain to Process Socialization And Communication. >:V

Physical therapy exercises. Finish and upload videos, edit costume pictures & etc. Do the new costumes I've planned. MAKE SCULPTURES at some point, I miss them.

Notable foods: ASPARAGUS DAY FghdhVGVTYYEAAAAA!!! asparagus squad1!!!!! Also went against the evil nutritionist diet and allowed myself one serving of bread which I used to make a spicy turkey wrap sort of thing. >:) I miss being able to make spicy pickled onions and stuff. Still wishing for heartier food too.. I get blood testing soon, so maybe I'll find out if I'm actually deficient in something that's giving me constant cravings lol..

#just posting these publicly since it feels more like I'm doing something or easier to hold yourself accountable if you make public #declarations of goals and progress or etc. .. perhaps.. for now #no rambling tags today... too seepy eepy #investing my limited time stocks into Napping Incorporated instead of The Longwinded Typing Company #daily log

[snffbeebee]

What Are Your Thoughts?

Alrighty Y'all, I know it's been a hot minute since I've actually posted on here, but I promise, I'm trying to put myself on a better posting schedule, now that I have my new computer..my last one shit the bed, and well I write better touching the actual keys on a keyboard then on my phone! So what I'm try to say is.....

I'M BACK BITCHES!!!!!!!!

Now I've already began the next chapter for Second Glance, and after that, I will have to switch my brain into dark mode, to finish what @ezilyamuzed has written for the next chapter of Blood Red.

What some of you guys don't know is that I keep my Fanfic writing on the down low. No one is my real life knows I do it, besides a few..And well throughout the time I've been away, I have been writing something that is not related to Supernatural. Mystery/ Thriller..It doesn't have a name yet... or even a full chapter written, because getting all of the back stories, and characters together takes a lot longer than you think..Where am I going with this you are probably asking...Well.. I just wanted to reach out to all of my Loves on here, and ask if I posted something that wasn't Supernatural or fandom related, would you read it??

I would love to share everything I write with you guys, so PLEASE tell me your thoughts!! Maybe if enough of you guys say yes...I'll post the first chapter when it's finished!

Okay, enough of the chit chatting, I'm finally able to post my tag list, so loves get ready for some spam!!

P.S. Thank you to everyone who has stayed with me through my absence and Welcome to all the new comers! We are a crazy bunch, but I wouldn't have it any other way!

@ezilyamuzed @redlipstickandthewinchesters @ain-t-bovvered @bamby0304 @bobasheebaby @curly-haired-disaster @dean-winchesters-bacon @imma-winchester-addict @itsstillnotwhatyouthink @ladywinchester1967 @julesthequirky @lovemesomecas94 @myinconnelly1 @mrsnazario1223 @missjenniferblog @squirrel-moose-squad-blog @supernaturalsammy01 @time-travel-bouqet @waywardbaby @waywardnerd67 @whimsicalrobots @thekatherinewinchester  @jackles-jadalecki-blog @nanie5 @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @iwriteaboutdean @bitterstar88 @angelessquirrel @thebeautywithinme @speakinvain @spn-winchester-app  @horsegirly99blog @biawol @deans-baby-momma @death-unbecomes-you @deans-jiggly-pudding @destielhoneybee  @meganywinchester @bitchy-ginger-1 @mscarrilv @hunterswearingplaid @mannls @perpetualabsurdity @adoptdontshoppets @ladystiltskin67 @sweet-things-4-life @deangetsme @sandlee44 @somilotopia @ilovefanfic86 @srsllydunnodoncare @bella-ca @donnaintx @sirod-30 @peridottea91 @thisismysecrethappyplace @mogarukes @hazel-eye-coffee-shop-girl-blog @deanwinchesterficsx @daughterofthenight117 @getnaildbyme @whereismykrustykrab @-lovepeacenhope- @thatsnotwhoifuckingam @4evrfandom @fanfictionjunkie1112 @my-proof-is-you @maddiepants @multi-fandom-wby @fangirl-forevers-world @thisgirllovespizza @leatherandapples @unabashedsoul97 @deanna-s-winchester @witch-of-letters @spnj2m2 @ruthiesconnells @my-fucking-noodles @holylulusworld @spn-impala-67 @iamabeautifulperson18 @gracefultrenchcoat494 @stoneyggirl @squirrellybaby67 @thefaithfulwriter @heartsaved @ jessica-marsh09 @explorethelittlethingsoflife

#supernatural #spnfamily #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester #sam winchester #dean winchester x reader #Bexisback

[smokedruid]

nothing gets me more in the mood to do my silly computer tasks than dark academia study pinterest boards. that shit is CRACK to my squirrel brain

#aesthetic #dark academia #studyblr #studyspo #study aesthetic #light acadamia aesthetic #academia #classic academia

[para-imperium]

Horizon: Rebuilt Ch. 4

After two and a half more hours the leukosynths had sufficiently patched up Horizon’s digestive system that her medical systems gave her the all clear to ingest something. It was well after most of the people at the Friendly Society had taken their meals, but that suited her. She usually preferred to eat alone anyways, too many people gave odd looks at the large plates she tended to pile up, especially if they were aware of her augmentations.

Jenny accompanied her to the canteen and started ordering several hot meat pies and cold teas from the vending machines, as well as a mineral shake that Horizon grudgingly accepted after mixing in a large dose of sugar and smokeweed powder. When they sat down Horizon immediately grabbed a pie before the squirrel tried to start a conversation, “so, has Sam said anything else?”

Horizon finished the pie in three large bites before answering her, “not really. I tasked her with analyzing my systems before I went to talk with the coordinators.” It was only a small lie, she told herself. That thing had been inside her long enough that she barely thought of it as anything but another FedTech implant.

“You spoke with the coordinators?” Jenny asked with surprise. “Not just coordinator Taranda? About what?”

The raccoon sighed, “they want me to work solo until further notice.”

Jenny blinked, trying to process her girlfriend’s statement. “What? But you’ve been great. Is this about the guy who got his legs fried?”

“It’s more about Bill getting impaled,” Horizon started to explain. “Apparently people tend to get hurt a lot more often when I’m on a mission.”

“Of course they do!” Jenny shouted. “You go on the riskiest missions because you’re able to survive better than anyone else in the Society.”

Horizon nodded. “Unfortunately, they seem to think that piece of debris that went straight into my cockpit seemed targeted. Like somebody is out to get me.”

The squirrel gasped, “wait. Like maybe the Company is trying to kill you off?”

“Or Princeps,” the raccoon countered. “I still have no idea if he survived or not.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Jenny conceded. “But wouldn’t he know that a little piece of rusty metal wouldn’t do more than inconvenience you for a few hours?”

Horizon shrugged, “if it hit the right spot, it might be a bit worse. My head for instance.”

Jenny paused and thought for a minute, “I don’t know, maybe?”

Tanya blinked, “what do you mean? Maybe?”

“Well…” Jenny trailed off as she tried to find the right words. “I saw some of the video of them pouring you out of the escape capsule and…”

“What?” Horizon inquired.

Jenny sighed, “your skull looked well, crushed.”

“Crushed!?” the raccoon stood up, shaking the table.

“Yeah…” the squirrel scratched her ears in clear discomfort. “I don’t know how else to describe it.”

Horizon’s eyes narrowed as she stared down at someone she’d considered a friend, lover even. “What, happened?” she demanded.

“It…” Jenny’s gaze fell, after a minute she started making gestures with her hands that Horizon recognized as actions to use her brain-computer interface, much more primitive than the FedTech in her own brain. “It would be simpler if I showed you.”

Horizon saw a data file pop up in her HUD and after a second’s consideration accepted it. It turned out to be a set of videos, she found the earliest dated one and opened it.

She saw from the perspective of a chest camera as the wearer finished sawing open a mangled airlock door. As the detached panel floated away, she saw a familiar, yet different sight. The cockpit of the Dustbin was strewn with debris and loose instruments, and the space seemed even more cramped than usual as the ceiling panel seemed to have partially caved in, but the flexible layers had kept the air seal.

And then there was the blood, garnet spheres floating everywhere, with the occasional chunk of tougher unidentifiable gore. “Wow, what a mess,” the camera’s wearer commented dryly. “Pretty sure nobody could survive this.”

The camera moved onto the remnants of the pilot’s chair and Horizon tensed. There was nothing in it but a patch of red slime in the vague shape of a parahuman body, some metallic bits poking out of the sludge. Some of the metal bits were shaped like bones, her breath caught as she spied a small sphere in the middle of where her torso would have been, but the rest were so pulverized as to be nigh-unidentifiable.

“Huh,” the hapless aid worker laid a finger on a bluish-silver femur, one of the few bones to completely maintain its shape through sheer mass. “I heard that spacers used to coat their bones in titanium, didn’t know anyone-” he stopped and yanked his finger back as blackish blood flowed up the length of the bone and a pseudopod of gore reached half-heartedly for him.

“Control, did you see that?!” He reared back and the camera saw several of the larger floating droplets extend spider-web like filaments in all directions. When the filaments encountered smaller droplets, they climbed the line up to unite with the larger ones. The filaments of two larger droplets intersected and both shot out thick tendrils of blood that pulled one another closer. “Holy scat!”

The camera turned towards the head of the smear-like corpse and Horizon saw a bowl of metallic bone assemble itself around a pool of gelatinous gore, then cover itself with a thick plate that began to sprout teeth. “Get me out of here!” the camera’s wearer begged. “Get me out!”

Horizon closed the video, shock showing in her eyes.

Jenny nodded, “like I said. Hard to describe.”

Horizon took in a series of long, but halting breaths. “What happened to him?” she asked.

Jenny looked confused for a few moments before catching on. “Oh, you mean the recovery guy? He’s fine, physically at least.”

“Define ‘fine’?” Horizon asked.

“Well, he had a spacesuit on,” Jenny waved with a finger as she reviewed the relevant files. “So, he was protected from whatever was in your blood. After peeling it off him they burned the suit with a fusion torch, shaved him, and put him through three decontamination showers just to be sure.” Her eye twitched and she gave a slight wince as she read, “ooh, acidic and basic showers? That couldn’t be pleasant.”

“What happened to my brain?!” Horizon exclaimed as the image of the pink gelatin-like mass in her reassembling skull came back unbidden.

Jenny just shrugged, “no idea. Maybe your leukosynths saved a copy of your brain structure somewhere and rebuilt it from backup? Maybe they moved it somewhere else? Maybe they transformed it into some high-tech nanogel?”

Tanya shook as she sat back down. “What did they do to me? Am I still the same raccoon you knew in school? Am I some kind of clone?”

A red panda appeared on the table, sitting with her legs crossed. “You are Tanya Loter of the raccoon clan, alias Horizon. Nobody is the same person they were a decade ago, or even the day before.”

“What do you mean, nobody is the same person they were the day before?” Horizon snapped at her AI.

“Well,” Sam scratched her chin in thought. “Have you heard of the Ship of Theseus paradox?”

“No,” Horizon retorted.

Jenny looked around the room as Horizon spoke, evidently not seeing the panda on the table. “Are you talking to Sam again? I thought you said she was busy?”

“My sensors indicated you were experiencing an identity crisis and I put the analysis on pause,” Sam replied. “By the way, she didn’t hear that, I thought you’d like some privacy.”

“She dropped everything to help, and we’d appreciate a bit of privacy,” Horizon relayed, then switched to subvocalization. What is a Ship of Theseus and how is it relevant here?

“Okay,” Sam held up a hand and a boat made of brown material with a large sail like some oligarch’s maritime pleasure craft appeared in her hand. “Back on Old Terra there was a hero named Theseus. He sailed to an island to slay a monster that threatened his city-state and when he came back his people put his ship in a museum.”

As Horizon watched, the view of the ship zoomed in on a deck plate of the ship, which began to warp and splinter before her eyes. “The ship’s plates were made out of, oh your language is so limited, trees, which would rot over time…”

Why would they waste trees on building ships? Horizon thought.

Sam sighed, “because it was a natural planet during the Bronze Age. Trees were in abundance and easier to work with than any metals they knew how to use. Anyways, as these plates rotted,” the plate was removed, and a fresh plate of tree material was put in its place. “The curators replaced them with fresh plates.”

And? Horizon was starting to wonder if she’d ever get to the point.

“After a couple hundred years the people of Theseus’ city-state became known for their philosophical tradition, and his ship became the subject of many discussions.” The view of the ship zoomed back out and the old, warped ship rippled and was new again. “Once every plate and nail were replaced with new ones, was it still the same ship that had carried their hero?”

I think, Horizon paused mid-sentence. She thought she’d known but as she started to think about it she wasn’t sure.

“Anyways, about two thousand years later human medical science advanced to the point where the paradox had a new subject.” The ship disappeared and was replaced by a human outline with transparent skin, “the human body.”

You mean augmentation? Horizon suggested.

“Possibly even before that,” the human outline zoomed in on a wall of cells, bisected by a streaming blood vessel. “After the cell was discovered, it was realized that individual cells died rather frequently.”

As Horizon watched a cell shriveled up and disintegrated, only for a neighboring cell to split off a new cell to replace it. The process repeated itself elsewhere in the view, over and over again. I had no idea, Horizon thought in astonishment.

“Given the state of the Tiere System I’m surprised you even have surgeons,” Sam quipped. “Anyways, multicellular organisms are apparently squishy Ships of Theseus’s. You would have thought that would settle the issue, but apparently it didn’t. It took the invention of mind cloning to settle that.”

Mind cloning is real then?

“Yes, but highly illegal.” The view of the human shape moved up to the brain, a chunk of which disappeared and was replaced by a metallic box with wires that snaked around the rest of the brain. “The first radical brain implants caused significant changes in behavior that led people to believe that the pre-implant person was dead and replaced with a new person. But that was fixed as brain scans were improved and implants were designed that could exactly replicate the function of the removed neurons. Cyborgs were conclusively the same person.”

A second human outline appeared next to the first one, “clones, on the other hand…”

I’m guessing they were not the same person as their original?

“No, they were not,” one of the outlines took on a reddish hue while the other turned bluish. “Clones would experience near-constant identity crises as they wondered if they were the same as their progenitor. When the progenitor was still alive and did something differently the clone was forced to accept that they were different. While post-mortem clones constantly second-guessed themselves, asking if what they wanted to do was what they would have done before the brain scan that created them.”

And what about me? Horizon inquired. Did you clone my brain to fill my rebuilt skull?

“No,” Sam asserted. “We repaired it.”

Repaired from what? the raccoon demanded. All I could see was soup in my open skull.

“More of a microbot-infused protoplasm,” Sam tried to explain. “Once the skull was closed your leukosynths took the materials that your brain had been composed of and reassembled them into a working brain.”

Horizon thought for a couple minutes, she chewed absently through another couple meat pies before coming up with something new to add. You said that brain implants could replicate the functions of the brain parts they replaced. How much of my brain is implants?

“Classified!” Sam’s tail shot towards Horizon’s face and shouted at her, causing the raccoon’s hairs to stand up on end.

“Sorry,” the panda started stroking the fur of her tail to try and coax it into calming down. “That information’s locked behind multiple clearance barriers, even I don’t know the answer.”

Horizon stared down the fanged mouth on the end of the AI’s tail, once she was over her initial shock, she had a question for it. Who has clearance for that information?

The tail replied in a deep and assertive voice, “mission commander Irvine Lupus is the only individual in this system who can unlock that information.”

Her first thought towards this reply was annoyance, she didn’t know whether Princeps was alive or dead and he was still giving her orders. That got her wondering though, what if the commander is permanently dead?

“Command and clearance devolve onto lieutenant commander Melene Corus.”

And if she is dead?

“Captain Tanya Loter is to take command.”

A grin crossed Horizon’s face.

#sci fi #fiction #sci-fi #transhumanism #short story #serial #superheroes #blood #gore

[lostjared]

Dreams I experienced in a Coma

Here is some information about the Dreams I experienced while in the coma.

As I journeyed through the depths of unconsciousness, it was as if I were enveloped by a vortex, a symbolic gathering of experiences embodying both the positive and negative aspects of life. This vortex carried me toward a realm of safety and introspection, illustrating the mind's complex way of navigating through the vast expanse of human emotion and memory during periods of deep unconsciousness.

Within this mental odyssey, my dreams wove together narratives that spanned the whimsical to the reflective. I envisioned scenarios ranging from the adventures of an anthropomorphic squirrel in literature or television, to early computers whimsically simulating Mickey Mouse ice skating, each dream blending elements of culture, technology, and personal meaning.

One particularly vivid dream cast me in a bygone era, the 1950s, where I spent time with siblings I've never known in reality. They possessed a camera that paradoxically merged digital and analog technology, capturing our moments in monochrome metaphor for my brain's exploration of time, memory, and the juxtaposition of past and future.

In a space where souls congregated, my consciousness drifted freely, akin to floating on the ocean's currents. This symbolized a collective unconsciousness, a shared realm where individual identities merge and consciousness explores the very essence of existence.

My dreams also delved into personal and relational dynamics, such as an imagined family life with a child I was absent from. This narrative thread reflected deep-seated emotions and the complexities of human relationships, including the impact of technology, depicted by the child's toys causing digital chaos, and societal changes on personal connections.

I found myself dreaming of starting a progressive television station in England, a venture that faced market apathy. This dream, along with encountering a steamboat captain reminiscent of a divisive public figure, underscored my subconscious engagement with societal and political themes, reflecting a contemplation of identity, purpose, and the struggle for progress in a changing world.

The presence of a horror icon, Robert Englund, proposing a collaborative online game, juxtaposed with his role in a controversial late-night show, highlighted the interplay between popular culture, personal aspirations, and societal critique.

As my dream journey culminated, I experienced a virtual reality that spun faster and faster until I broke through to another level of consciousness. This sensation represented the mind's potential to transcend the limitations of the physical and digital worlds, exploring the boundaries of reality and perception.

These vivid, surreal narratives were the most profound thoughts I've ever encountered, making perfect sense within the dream world yet challenging to articulate in the English language. They represent the brain's remarkable ability to process emotions, memories, and societal influences, weaving them into a rich tapestry that explores the depths of human consciousness and the intricacies of the subconscious mind.- Jared Bruni

#coma #dreams #coma dreams #deep #deep coma #unconcious

[crystallinearts]

ALSO-

Since you said we can talk to you about anything, I'm gonna talk about your interpretations of two characters in specific.

Scaramouche would be the first! I remember reading the descriptions of both reverse comfort videos, and honestly, I like your analyses! And of course, your top-notch voice. Not a lot of people talk of the trauma that he has, and I found that to be a pity because you can do a lot with that!

And then there is Subject 2 as the second. A lot of people interpret him as Yandere and don't get me wrong, they're not bad, they can do whatever they want. But I like more your interpretation (correct me if I'm wrong) that he is just a little dude which just appreciates a lot the person that gave him a bit of affection without holding it above him, like Gold probably would do, and that he just wants someone to appreciate him as he is.

In conclusion, I like my characters being a sad, wet dog (joking... or maybe? 🤨)

That is about it, remember to have a good day! :>

- 🧉 anon

YESSSS OMG please talk to me!! I may take forever to respond sometimes (thank u what I believe is either undiagnosed ADHD or just my brain being an easily distracted squirrel brain) but I love talking about this stuff~

Godddd this makes me so happy! so like, for as much as I absolutely adore Genshin and watch tons of lore videos and read about all of it… I’ve actually never played it firsthand, because my computer doesn’t have the storage space for it… I tried to install it and was told I didn’t have enough space, so, the dream died XD

that means I can sometimes be a little insecure in my portrayals of characters and sometimes I get a little depresso espresso over it. but knowing that people like my interpretations of them just makes me grin! even though I have yet to actually play this game (I’ll get there at some point hhhh!!) I am extremely passionate about a lot of the characters and I want to create good content of them!

more people should delve into Scara’s trauma… like, not only is it good reverse comfort material, he needs to talk about it!! recovery only starts when he begins to open up and share it with people, and develop bonds with others that allow him to open up in the first place. a romantic partner is a good place to start opening up! it’s ok fandango man you will get to a better place eventually, just let people help you- XD

AND AS FOR DORIAN!! aka Subject Two, Susbedo, Rubedo, whatever you wanna call him… oof. I have so many feelings about him, I am looking both respectfully and disrespectfully, and he’s so exactly the type of character I love. I’ve seen the yandere take on him quite a bit, and yeah, like you say, don’t get me wrong, I can absolutely see why people would take him in that direction! but personally, he doesn’t seem like a full-on yandere to me… and this is coming from someone who’s been known to fall for yanderes! (Cole from Blush Blush, I’m looking at your Cyno-VA-sharing smooth voiced ass)

Dorian is just this broken, pathetic, jealous little mess of a man who desperately wants what Albedo has… and sees no other way to get it other than to take his place. he doesn’t think he deserves good things, because Rhinedottir/Gold told him he was a failure and left him for dead for seemingly just existing (like, there doesn’t seem to be anything ‘wrong’ with him, you know? so it’s like, what the FUCK was even her reason there?)… but he really wants those good things. he doesn’t want to take the good things from Albedo, but he doesn’t know how else to go about getting them for himself. he wants to be loved and accepted without someone attaching conditions to it or expecting him to be something or someone else.

and, of course, that said… once he starts living with Albedo and they come to actually be brothers, you would not BELIEVE how quickly he warms up to that sibling affection and how fiercely he would protect his little family. he goes from wanting to kill Albedo to replace him, to being 10000% ready to destroy any threat that tries to kill Albedo.

… anyway I could literally talk about Dorian in particular FOREVER. if I ever get the opportunity to write a thesis on a fictional character it will be HIM!! I have so much to say about him.

YOU’RE TOTALLY VALID THO!!! OKAY?? I like my characters pitiful, complicated, and physically weak/sickly/etc. so I have ample opportunity to take care of them =)

I know this took me a hot minute to answer but!! you too!!! <3

#answered #Bellum babbles #honey anon #I'M GONNA SCREAM ABOUT ALL THE CHARACTERS AND AIN'T NUTTIN Y'ALL CAN DO ABOUT IT- #I'm also gonna smooch em all and ain't nuttin u can do about that either