They say love is not poetry
Thats it is a choice you make
And will i agree with the latter
To me the former has never made sense
I cannot see your eyes
Caramel is the sunlight
Chocolate in the moonlight
And not think there is poetry in that
I hear your laugh
Its loud, carefree and easy
It reminds me of the rain on a warm summer's day
Unexpected but right
I cannot look at you in the face
And not want to write odes about your beauty
I could write lyrics about your words
It feels like there is poetry in all that you do
So why would it be different in the love we share
When my thoughts orbit around the sun of your smile
There is poetry in that
And yes i made the choice to love you
But even in that there is poetry
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For how long are you going to be at war with yourself? Raise your white flag already!
.
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OCTO OCTA // LOOPS FOR HEALING
[FOR LOVERS EP, 2019]
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If ... you loved someone for a very long time, moving on feels like a betrayal. Betrayal to the love you offered, to the person you were, to all the efforts, hopes, and chances you're always willing to take for that person.
It just doesn't seem right to fall for someone else. It's painful but it feels so right to keep loving that same person and to keep hurting for him and because of him.
And you'll get lost between wanting to have a future for yourself and wanting to comfort, stay, and hug your past self. You will feel as if loving him was the only thing that you should do— the only thing that you can do.
And that's how you get stuck. You're aware that the love is gone but you don't acknowledge it. You don't want to— because it also means leaving and saying goodbye to your younger self.
For years, that's what will keep you going. That's what will haunt you— fooling you into believing you still love that person.
But, no.
So, mourn for your younger self who didn't achieved the kind of life and love story she wanted to have. Mourn and cry and grieve for all the hopes and dreams crushed. Keep crying. Keep grieving. Keep mourning for everything that has kept you alive for years but are now dead.
You can never be you if you keep holding onto the past version of you. It doesn't matter if that was your best version, just let it go.
You only think that was your best version because you're letting it hold you back from being the bestest version of you.
Cherish the past but do not hold onto it. You can move on. You can let go. Your younger self will forgive you. Your past self will be happy for you. Your past self needs to be freed— it will thank you for letting it go, it will be happy and proud. So, do it.
-vena
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I already have what i need
I have found my salvation
I have found the reason for my creation
Here in your arms
What deity could compare
To the love i feel for you
When i would choose
Time and time again
To bite that poisoned fruit
If it meant i could have you
If i could simply exist as yours
What could compare
I may be a sinner
But i have been held in the arms of an angel
And if that is not enough salvation
Then they are searching for what does not exist
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major lamp state of mind right now!!
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