the man trained by the shimotsuki since childhood, the mind behind the three sword style, the demon pirate hunter, vice captain of the Strawhat Pirates,
easily stopped with a hand on his shoulder by his captain (currently in a silly hungry vibe)
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I realised the other day that part of my severe anxiety (co-morbid with AUDHD) is to do with task completion. It falls under the umbrella of executive dysfunction, but here's what the physical and mental process looks like for me:
I go into a room to get something for a task. Whilst there, I see an empty glass. I think, 'I should take that glass to the kitchen'. I get the item I came into the room for. I leave and continue the original task. In my mind, something has been logged: there is an incomplete task (the empty glass to go to the kitchen). But it's not important enough for me to retain the details, so I forget them. The emotion of 'task incomplete', however, remains.
When I have that horrible nagging 'I've forgotten something' feeling, it's most likely because I have.
I have to trust that if it's truly important, I will remember or be reminded in some way. Alternatively, if it is important and I forget, I have to trust that the people/systems I have chosen to be in my life will understand and forgive me.
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more old man yaois under the cut 💕
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If you’re feeling anxious, some of these might help!
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I just want to talk about the nursery being painted and the purpose of the Tomb to be without a door. Anastasia had a family - and putting to the side the pact with Alecto there's some implicit symbolism to John asking for the workers of the Ninth to die constructing the Tomb with that image of new life. (Still can't articulate my disbelief that he went and didn't think that asking Anastasia of all people, The one who lost her cavalier to him, would have problems)
Yeah. Especially finding this out about the Ninth, where nurseries becoming tombs is a thing we're sensitive about.
On one level we've always known Anastasia had a family. Like, we know she's Harrow's direct ancestor. You can't be heir to the line of someone who never had children. But the nursery.... Yeah. It really hammers it in. Her friends painted a nursery mint green for her children.
And now it's a tomb.
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I need help.
I don't know if I'm even allowed to do this, but here goes.
I am currently a full-time university student living on campus. I am diagnosed with CPTSD, generalized and social anxiety disorder, and major depressive disorder, and I also suspect ADHD and/or autism which are constantly dismissed when I bring it up. I am taking meds and in counseling, but my issues have made it impossible for me to get even a part-time job while also attending school due to extreme burn-out which just makes all the other issues worse.
I looked into getting supplemental security income but was told that I would have to drop out of school and it could take years to prove I'm in need of benefits. I don't want to give up my chance at a degree which could greatly benefit me later on just because of my struggles now, just to be waiting possibly years for an uncertainty of receiving SSI.
I am embarrassingly asking for donations to help me to pay my bills, a $200 a month car payment, and two $100+ credit card payments. My room and board are covered by my student loans but I am dangerously close to not being able to pay those other bills which will destroy my credit and potentially lose my car.
Literally ANY amount could be of great help to me and would be appreciated beyond words. My CashApp and Venmo are written below. Thank you for any help, even just sharing this.
$lindsypaige - cashapp
@liiindsy -venmo
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The funny thing about Pharma and the Delphi situation is that that's where the concept of the DJD was first introduced (with the first scene with the DJD at work happening literally the issue afterwards, issue #6) and literally the more you learn about the DJD the more it vindicates Pharma in his paranoia and being convinced that he couldn't ask for help like
In the Delphi issues we learn that the DJD hunts down Decepticon turncoats/traitors/etc and that Ambulon, one of the Delphi staff, was a Decepticon traitor. We also learn that their leader is evidently terrifying in addition to being a t-cog addict, but that's it.
Except in the subsequent issue #6 and all issues with the DJD afterwards, we learn a variety of fun facts about the DJD such as
Several of the members either literally transform into torture equipment or have said torture equipment built into their bodies
Their leader, Tarn, the guy with the t-cog addiction that forced Pharma into blackmail, can kill people with just his VOICE
We later learn that the DJD have a fanatical devotion to the Decepticon cause/Megatron such that they literally worship an idol of Megatron
Even later on, we learn that Tarn's kill-you-with-his-voice powers work both over the phone and via recordings of his voice
Tarn is also very talkative during torture sessions and he seems to find pleasure in his stupid, smug-smart guy persona where he likes to describe to victims what's happening to them and why. And there's no reason he wouldn't apply this to Autobots just as much as he does to Decepticon traitors
The DJD have access to signal jamming technologies that make it so that even if their victim can get a help signal out, no one will receive it until weeks after the fact
Their entire system of hunting people down is based on pursuing them no matter what, isolating them from any help, driving them mad with psychological terror, etc
They're capable enough warriors to slaughter an entire ships' worth of people, apparently without sustaining any meaningful casualties
They're drug addicts that are prone to overdosing and/or losing control and slaughtering people while they're under the influence
So like???
If Pharma was only privy to HALF of the things that we as the audience know about the DJD, it's perfectly reasonable to assume that Pharma probably wanted to call for help at some point, but was convinced that doing so would lead to 1. the signal being jammed/blocked so no one would help anyways 2. him and everyone else at Delphi (including the TRAITOR WHO IS ONE OF THEIR EMPLOYEES) would be horribly tortured to death by fanatical Decepticon torturer freaks.
Like I get that in the text Pharma only says that he did the Red Rust stuff so that he wouldn't be caught/blamed for the t-cog deal and is prideful about how he stopped the DJD from murdering Delphi, but like...... there's no fucking way that Pharma going "oh I didn't want to get in trouble and also I'm better than everyone" was his PRIMARY reason for everything on Delphi. Pharma didn't go from perfectly normal/sane Autobot doctor to raving egotistical maniac because he was always an asshole and he decided to solve the DJD issue in an asshole way. It's bc according to all canon evidence we have of the DJD and the way they react to traitors/Autobots, Pharma had every reason to fear for his life and believe that no aid would come to him.
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I wish I had know this so much earlier in life, but thoughts like “my childhood was super normal and pleasant why do I feel so broken” are symptomatic. They scream repressed trauma.
If you find yourself wondering things like that regularly, you could very possibly have (c)ptsd or any number of other traumagenic mental health conditions. You should consider at least doing a little research on your own if nothing else.
If you feel chronically miserable or broken or isolated or lost that suffering is valid, always. You must have lived though something awful in order to feel that kind of darkness.
You are a survivor even if you’re not sure what you survived, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
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You know, I don’t think my anxiety about the whole thing would have spiked at all if I’d seen the new DBB interview and then seen that new promo. Because I would have read it and thought, well, that’s what DBB’s been saying for ten months and there’s still wiggle room in his words, even if the person doing the write up approaches it with a “Tech died” framing. I would have been nervous, but not upset. And then I would have seen the promo and gone, “Yeah, okay, he’s just alive then.”
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Do you think Pete sees all these spiderpeople facing threats that tower over buildings, over worlds, that have power, magic, weaponry he could barely understand the scope of, and shudders?
He's resilient, and damn good at what he does, but they're in a different league - an entirely different game. He's got political corruption to battle, but other spiderpeople face truly fantastical monsters.
Do you think he felt, perhaps... unprepared, out of his depth, fragile, small, gleaning the scope of 1610's Rogues Gallery + Collider?
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She Generalize on my Anxiety till I Disorder
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My tic (singular for now, let's hope it stays that way) is annoying me, so you know what. Curse be upon ye. I now headcanon that Rick and Morty both have tics.
Rick's vary wildly and every time he "fixes" one another one develops. They couldn't possibly be caused by his stress or anxiety, no—he's convinced they're all caused by his implants and that he can eventually fix them all. He's forever stuck in the denial/bargaining phase until he sees Morty struggling too and feeling othered by Rick's efforts to "fix" himself.
Rick's tics mostly include jerking motions, weird leg/arm movements. This sometimes includes violent actions like punching; not so bad when he's out on adventures or by himself, but terrible when he's sitting at the table with his family eating breakfast or dinner. More rarely is he affected by making repetitive sounds or consistent facial tics but when those happen he isolates himself more.
Morty's tics are caused by his anxiety but no matter what he does they never really go away. Loud lights, sudden sounds, and caffeine tend to trigger them.
Morty's tics are facial. Eye-flinching, grimacing, the works. One time, it looked like he was winking at Jessica and Brad wasn't very happy about that. Over time he's gotten better at disguising them, but they still make him feel awkward.
Once Rick accepted that ticks were just a fact of life and started supporting Morty, they both felt much less alone.
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overheard my boss saying he'll hire someone else to replace me
I think im gonna need those commissions and donations more than ever now, so im cancelling the hiatus I was gonna have until february
please commission me (details in the fixed post) or donate any amount to my paypal link, now not only I need help buying my meds, I'll need help paying for everything
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Anxious or worried? Try asking yourself these questions!
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I feel like recently, ADHD has kind of become shorthand for “a person who is annoying online and has no real problems,” and I don’t really think that’s awesome news, given the context that ADHD has a long history of being disregarded as a made up disorder that’s just an excuse for poor/obnoxious behavior, no matter how much scientific research proves otherwise. ADHD is not by any means the only disorder that has people making a thousand misleading tiktoks about it, so perhaps do some critical thinking about why specifically ADHD has become the poster child for that behavior. There are certainly valid criticisms to be made of the way we discuss mental health online, but maybe use your brain and determine why this disorder in particular is the one that’s easiest to point at for being “annoying” and “not that big of a deal.”
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