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#i don't have a consistent theme oops
ohwolfling · 5 months
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Hi, welcome to Galeposting with a sound design drop out who never seriously learned composition but can pick up on vibes and has a lot of feelings. I'll be linking to blog posts by composers and every musical piece I talk about.
Gale's introduction music has this instrumentation that feels like the wind, then these mournful swells above it and under it. I'll dig around more but I think the most consistent things in Gale's theme, the Gale-ness of it, is this soft, curious, playful sort of bouncing thing. Some of the more wind-like instrumentation I think is just... the Weave, it goes between comforting and foreboding in every Gale scene. The more sinister and haunting pieces you hear less and less in your romance with Gale (though I think all romance has the same variation to Down by the River to a certain extent - I need to go through all of them to track where it DOES shift- there's a lot of natural sound with Gale for sure and the Act II romance scene has the same sort of playful plodding and adds string, lmk if it's the same in any other act ii romances), so those to me feel decidedly Mystra?
I have a few pieces that I listen to as a sort of IDEA of what Gale's theme would be without the influence of Mystra or his conflicted emotions about the Weave, still a little playful, still deadly curious, and ultimately mournful. Our inescapable sad boy...
The French Library by Franz Gordon jumps around minor chords in a way that threatens to become triumphant or whimsical but ultimately returns to the same melancholic steps, sort of folding in on itself. It sort of reminds me of Mozart's Symphony 40 having a depressive episode instead of a bit of rage.
If you want these things but in a way that feels like a lullaby, a clumsy attempt at comfort, another Gale staple for me right now is Midwayer by Joep Beving. Beving has spoken about his music being a way for him to re-engage with his humanity, which I think you can FEEL on this entire album, but especially here. This quote in particular I really love in thinking about my little Gale playlist-
“We are either trained or we’re designed to respond to particular stimulants. For me it’s rediscovering the human skill in things so for me the message would be we have a common or shared understanding of what it’s like to be human. And we should not lose that connection.”
This brings me to a favorite fictional parallel I've found with Gale - Gaius Baltar from Battlestar Galactica. Composer Bear McCreary stayed away from themes in a traditional sense with a focus on music that world builds, establishes stakes/settings, over traditional sci fi theme/motif spamming, HOWEVER, you can track all major players through the show, which includes Gaius... I'm gonna go into these character parallels mostly by digging into the score for Battlestar Galactica below the cut here.
Gaius, a mortal plucked up by a God via a Six Cylon. The Six Cylons were designed for love- in this case, while God's feelings towards Gaius seem ever changing, focused on his PURPOSE over his comfort or happiness or anything else (SOUND FAMILIAR), Caprica Six very genuinely loves Gaius & they get what I think is one of the most beautiful endings in the show (arguably happy, although I don't think "happy" was the goal of any of those endings). Gaius' Folly is instead of loving Caprica as equals he walks right into the hands of the Cylons by handing her his ego instead and giving her access to a defense mainframe for "journalism" (she ended the world, oops). Anyway, in Gaius' pieces, you always have mournful swells, ominous things above and below him, the conflict of a man chosen by God, tortured by God, loved by something and someone who borders the line between a demi god AND is the fruit of man's attempt to play God.
Bear McCreary on the earliest interations of Gaius Baltar's theme, starting properly in season 2 (blog post here):
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Dark Unions is on my work-in-progress Gale Dekarios playlist and I didn't realize it until I sat down to try and pull pieces unique to Gale that it is almost, sonically and structurally, a dark echo of how Gale is introduced. If you listen to one into the other with no knowledge of the work they're from, it feels like they could be manifestations of the same piece.
When Gaius Baltar accidentally wields his relationship to God and stumbles into creating a cult (I mean, THE PARALLELS), his theme evolves to a kind of chant, The Cult of Baltar. Bear McCreary describes it as a drone, but the same whimsy and desperation remains. Here's what Bear McCreary has to say about the dichotomy of spiritual, cult leader, hand of God Gaius, sonically and thematically (McCreary's blog post here):
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And here is the prayer, translated to Anglo-Saxon, that the cult says to Baltar, and some thoughts about the two sides of Gaius Baltar still warring with one another, showing up sometimes where the other should instead:
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Are there any pieces of music in Baldur's Gate that define a Mystra theme more concretely? For those of you who have done multiple romances all the way through (I still haven't finished a play through, I'm TERRIBLE), is there anything unique to Gale that I should pick at more?
The Shape of Things to Come isn't technically a theme for Gaius or any one character, but it's so pivotal to how he transcends himself at the same time that he is forced to acknowledge his own frailty as compared to god(s). If you're unfamiliar with the show, the scene it first appears in is worth gazing at... (spoilers obv but trust me, you'll be confused & it will still be worth watching the show) it inhabits, along with Gaius, a kind of liminal space that Gale does in the story of Baldur's Gate I'd argue, and this sort of sweeping piece is the kind of piece Gale DESERVES in a world where this game gets to be even longer and about every origin character as individuals.
anyway...
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valentinaonthemoon · 29 days
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Spell your url with song titles and then tag as many people as there are letters
Thank you to @imlivingformyselfdontmindme for the tag! Her post is over here. We both have quite a long URL so this is going to be fun!
Valentino - Diane Birch
All the things she said - t.A.T.u
Let's Dance To Joy Division - The Wombats
Evacuate the Dancefloor - Cascada
No One - Alicia Keys
They Don't Know About Us - One Direction
Indietro - Tiziano Ferro
Nobody's Perfect - Jessie J
Applause - Lady Gaga
Oops, I Did It Again - Britney Spears
Non ti scordar mai di me - Giusy Ferreri
Tra Pioggia e Nuvole - Lost
Halo - Beyoncé
Everything back but you - Avril Lavigne
Madness - Muse
(One of those) Crazy Girls - Paramore
On The Floor - Jennifer Lopez
Naturally - Selena Gomez & The Scene
I especially chose songs from my teenage years, just so it could complicate it more have a consistent theme :D
I tag @pollodigitale, @not-the-face, @the-eclectic-wonderer, @wordscannotlie, @an-imaginary-raven, only if they want to do this <3
Hope you all have a lovely day!
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xoxo-ren-xoxo · 1 month
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What the Hell is Comms AU?!
Well first of all, Comms AU is a Hermitcraft fic I am writing. If you want to go into it blind, then the link is here!
[also, hey, if you like it, perhaps consider reblogging this post ;) ]
But if you'd like to know a little more before diving into it, I've decided to compile a fun little resource introducing the fic, its format, some of the most basic pieces of lore (so very mild spoilers, but it is stuff you would pick up on by chapter 3 or 4, honestly!) and a few tidbits about the characters. BELOW!
What the hell is Comms AU (For real this time)
I started Comms AU (full name INCOMING MESSAGE - COMM RECORDS) back in the middle of 2023, after reading some really great fics like the From The Archives series. It is a multiverse drama first and foremost, with elements of horror, betrayal, personal agency, and some religious themes [though the latter is mostly aesthetic]. There are also some comedic moments, and some sad moments. There's a lot of moments.
Comms AU follows five versions (universes) of Hermitcraft as they are all just kind of subjected to The Horrors. It is formatted as a series of transcripts recorded from different characters' communicator devices (or comms) which I imagine as sort of like sci-fi wrist watches with touchscreens and buttons. Though each universe could have slightly different models!
Formatting
As I mentioned, the fic is set out like a series of audio transcripts (though I kind of bend the rules to be honest, it can be read as if it is being played back as a recording), so the writing style is more like a script or screenplay than a standard prose piece. Your average chapter may look like this:
GRIAN: I'm saying a line now. SCAR: I'm also saying a line. [square brackets and italics to indicate a non-dialogue sound] GRIAN: Dang what was that?!
I also play around with writing out the communicator's 'screen' prompts such as its logging out message, 'call incoming' functions, etc. These I try to keep consistent between chapters, but I'm pretty sure I lost that consistency in a couple of places. Oops.
You may be wondering how you know which universe a certain scene is taking place in. It's quite simple, really! Each scene starts with a line of text like this:
[COMM RECORD: P#003]
The letter indicates the character whose comm we are listening/reading through (i.e., the perspective) while the number indicates what universe we are in [or what universe that character comes from, anyway...]. So the above example would be Pearl from universe three!
Lore?!
Okay this isn't really 'lore' as that would be total spoilers, but I want to talk about what kind of themes and things come up a lot in the fic - especially in terms of who is 'what'. For example, I've written Xisuma as a voidwalker, a type of end-hybrid which breathes better in thinner oxygen environments.
Scar and Cub are generally vexes, though there are differences between universes that become important later. Grian (at least, the times we see him) is a Watcher, and EvoSMP is canon [to some universes] but I try to explain everything within the fic itself so there shouldn't be too much confusion if you don't know much about all that.
Themes-wise, the fic revolves a lot around conversations and relationships between the characters, obviously. Words are very important, while actions must be left mostly implied through the audio medium. Characters aren't always reliable, and neither is sound. The fic takes a bit of digging and theorising to truly enjoy, but I am slowly revealing more and more as I write, so things will mostly get cleared up!
Also this fic mostly takes place in season 9, and there are references to season 9. There's some reference to season 8 too!
Characters
This is the important bit! I can't write all the hermits, obviously, as that would be too much to manage, so instead lets focus on the names that come up the most often:
Grian, Scar, Cub, Pearl, Xisuma, and Mumbo are probably the most 'recurring' characters, though Etho, Bdubs, and Cleo show up quite a bit especially towards the start.
[I am a Grian girlie and this is obvious from... everything about this fic, but I wouldn't say it is entirely about him! He does show up in most chapters though haha]
Relationships get a little complicated, due to the multiverse stuff, but I will say that there is mumscarian endgame because I love them. The actual 'romantic' side of things aren't that important, though, and most of the other relationships can be read kind of ambiguously. Just check the tags for more info!
It's still gay as hell but the multiverse horrors are more important, to be honest.
Or are they... ?!
YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO READ TO FIND OUT!
[psst, I also did some art, you can find it in my #comms au tag on my blog]
[psst psst, if you ever wanna message me, send an ask, or even make art (!!!!!!) to support this fic PLEASE feel free to do so. I love every comment, every ask, and all the bits of creative work people have made. REBLOG, COMMENT, GO CRAZY, ILY!!!!!]
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shallowseeker · 6 months
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fyi jack doesn't appear in rocky's bar
Probably shouldn't be answering these when I'm in a bad mood, but since you're poking me. Yeah. Neither is Mary. The bar is a workers'/coworkers' paradise, and that's all Dean's allowing for himself here. It's an anemic, starved happiness, where Dean is...endlessly waiting on a happiness that is so Paused that nothing truly bad can happen.
And Rocky's is mostly empty.
Dean's lost a lot of friends, and here, he's subconsciously aware that even if he retires, his loved ones might still be fighting/working, not at home with him. Thus, you get...the roadhouse. He is become like Ellen Harvelle.
The roadhouse is the domain of road warriors. It's and "after-work drinks" type of contentedness, not the "toes in the sand" type he'd been alluding to just a half-season before. That's why the bar itself is filled with the motifs of coworking and friendship. It's why it's full of those "sublimation's kinda your thing, Dean," motifs, like the Tombstone symbols.
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Dean sublimates his own desires. He'll take a big place doing who-cares if everyone can just be there. Ergo, roadhouse.
///
It's also why Sam and Cas are still working; they're out on a hunt, but they're not too far. They're "just down the road," in Wichita. Still in Kansas. It's why Dean is still working, albeit in a work-from-home situation, where he kills vampires ("theme of hunger") on an endless loop.
Mary isn't there at all. May! The thing "we finally found...after all this time," and the most broadly consistent part of Dean's "everything we've always wanted," is not here. Mary is integral to Dean's happiness, and he desperately wants her happiness too, as evidenced by Lebanon and all that's signified by his limbo-wandering in the companion series, The Winchesters.
And Jack? Jack is the thing he never gets to keep. It's the thing he's been steeling himself to lose since the very beginning:
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People like Mary and Jack are not in the roadhouse because they're very much a part of the things he wants but can't have, you see. They don't even one-to-one work motifs, because they're not and never have been co-workers to the degree that the others have.
So, Jack would be in a bunker version of a fantasy, no doubt. So would Mary. And probably versions of Sam and Cas (and Dean) that aren't, you know, working.
EDIT: Oops, I forgot the attributions. Scripts are from here. it's Tombstone and Jack in the Box.
(Text Attributions// Supernatural scripts here via @spnscripthunt. Transcripts are located here via SPNWiki. Visit their Tumblr to donate.)
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darishima · 9 months
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hello it is i anon who is definitely not you. you should show everyone ur super cool manga collection and also tell me about your favorite characters in great detail . btw
why hello anon who definitely isn't me!! thank you for asking because i have been waiting for someone to ask!!!
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here's the main shelf and my bulletin board!!! closeups + unnecessarily in depth rambling + other collection stuff under the cut (please please click keep reading please click it please please ple)
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closeup of the top shelf, this one mostly has my hero academia and one piece stuff. also has my junji ito books, and the demon slayer funkos i couldn't fit anywhere else. the mha figures along the top are knockoff wcf figures, not the real thing </3 bought them as cake toppers actually. i don't have all the mha manga i'm missing quite a few, but i have smash 1-2, team up missions 1-3, and all of the school briefs light novels
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middle shelf, this one is half midari ikishima shrine and half assorted manga and figures. plus the kyoka jiro plush that wouldnt fit on the top shelf
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bottom shelf! the manga is double layered on the sides for space conservation, the ones in the back are et cetera 1-9, chronicles of the cursed sword 1, psychic academy 1-2, .hack legend of the twilight 1-3 and .hack another birth 1-3. those and the buso renkin books were all given to me by a friend
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this is one of my favorite figures, himiko toga by banpresto. it was surprisingly cheap for how good it is, i think it was like $38? the kyoka jiro sticker is something my friend got for me when he visited japan, and it still has the original price tag on it which i think is cool. in this pic you can also see the shoyo hinata funko pop (held up by sticky tack lmao) and the kurogiri + twice funkos. these (and my many other tiny funkos) are actually keychains but i removed most of the keychain part and i display them as figures instead
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jiro section!! i really want to get her other funko variations, the school festival version of her with her guitar and the gamestop exclusive ofher with her microphone. and i REALLY want a scale of her, the newest one that's on preorder right now is so fucking cute but i'm too broke for it rn :( someday she'll be mine, but for now i just have a counterfeit wcf lmao
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YAMATO !!! goddd i love him so much. got this figure super recently actually, it was like last week. i saw him in boxlunch and couldnt resist
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the one piece section! i accidentally cut off the nico robin wano figure in this one oops :( i have the two ace's story light novels, the heroines ln (in japanese), the first manga volume in japanese, and the first fullmetal alchemist volume in japanese (doesn't fit the theme here, i know, but it didnt fit on the other shelves). here, i also have a vinsmoke reiju figure, a boa hancock figure in the back, a robin figure (dont ask why she's in her underwear i dont know either. but man do i like it), a yor forger figure, matching wano zoro and luffy funko keychains, and all my demon slayer funko keychains. i'm pretty sure this is the full set of them, i might be missing a nezuko variation though
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this small bakugo figure (which sits on top of mha ultra analysis) is the first figure i ever got, i think i got it like five years ago? i don't even remember where i got it from, it was probably a gashapon machine somewhere idk. i lost his original stand ages ago so now he's sticky tacked to a lego :(
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here's a closeup on my beloved midari ikishima shrine!! on the side is stickers of her sticky tacked to the shelf, and to the left is a hatsune miku drink can and a small yuji itadori figure. the shrine consists of 6 acrylic stands, 3 keychains, 3 button pins, 2 enamel pins, two sets of stud earrings, 6 stickers, 1 playing card with her on it (above the stickers but its cut off in the pic) and a bottle of purple nail polish that exactly matches the shade of hers. and kakegurui volumes 1 and 3 ofc (i plan to add kakegurui midari and the other kakegurui manga volumes to this soon). i really want more officially licensed midari merch but it's so hard to find and there's barely any of it. the white stand that some of the stuff is sitting on is a funko pop box with paper attached to it lmao
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moving down to the second shelf! here's a brook figure, i really love this guy. the sculpting on his hands is SO good
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next to brook is a zenitsu figure, a giyuu tomioka figure i got from a gashapon machine, and two tbhk pins
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meruem and komugi funko pop on top of the manga :') my god i love these two so much. i really want to get that bandai figure of them but its like $500 at the CHEAPEST and it's not even good quality :( i'd like to get the hunter fan studios figure of them but alas, its also $500 dollars. someday i will </3 there's also a yuji itadori acrylic stand and a yuji funko keychain to the left that i forgot to take a closeup of
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i've also got the komugi funko because of course i do, and it's displayed in front of hxh vol 25 because of course it is. someday i'm gonna get the meruem and pitou pops and i want them soo fucking bad but they're harder to find. also a zoro figure! from the same set as brook and the robin and otama figures from the top shelf.
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had to do a closeup on this adorable killua and alluka pin, and the killua funko keychain
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bottom shelf closeups! here's the middle of the shelf, with the rets of my hxh funkos (netero, bisky, and kurapika), my radical ed funko (i want the other two so bad but they're expensive :( got a matching keychain though), a honey senpai funko and a kuromi one. plus a cool large miku pin, a yor forger pin, and a pochita plush. i really love the all in one death note book. also, death note volume 3 (the blue one that's slightly taller than the others) was the first manga i ever got! i got it at a thrift store like four years ago i think. the k-on omnibus is the most recent manga ive gotten
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yugioh section! duelest 1-4 and millennium world 1-3 were both gifts from a friend, and i got zexal 1-2 at a thrift store. they were from a school library, hence the stickers on the bottom that say west and south. really annoying, but i mostly covered them with a yugioh gameboy cartridge (i do not own a gameboy lmao). also ohshc pins!
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on top of the yugioh manga is my other mha funko keychains, cubone and pikachu figures, a gudetama keychain, and a pochita necklace (which is actually a friendship necklace with my friend @/fartfeild)
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other side of the shelf! the demon slayer pins have a glare on them in the pic which sucks. also have a miku pin, a gudetama coin purse thing, a mimukyu plush and figure (there's another mimikyu figure on top of the k-on manga), and four one piece pins
btw, the way i prop up the pins is by sticky tacking them onto legos!!
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that's all for the shelf!! the shelf below this one is just full of empty boxes from the scales and funkos. onto the bulletin board!!
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kyojuro rengoku, denji, zero two, tamaki suoh, takashi mori, honey senpai, and katsuki bakugo enamel pins! the chainsaw man and one piece things are cardboard packaging from other things that i cut out.
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i LOVE this power pin, she's so fucking cute. the nami pin is gorgeous <3
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two my melody pins, a hello kitty pin, and a chainsaw man button! plus an iguro keychain i got from a gashapon machine, and midari ikishima panels i printed. cause obviously i did
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sailor mercury keychain! it's from 1999 (does that count as vintage? i think it does)
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anya forger, all might, and bakugo keychains! plus a really high quality boa hancock enamel pin and a kurapika pin. the pretty flower is a pin i got from a melanie martinez concert, and the pink paper is confetti from the concert
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dr stone lanyard, hxh keychain, kuromi pins, more midari panels, and multiple enamel pins (2 zoros, straw hat jolly roger, decidueye pokemon, yumeko jabami, and a dragon pin i got from a local artist at a fair)
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jet black keychain (got it in a blind bag and im still mad i didnt get ed. i love jet too though), an emma keychain, more manga panels (ririka momobami and himiko toga) and a joey wheeler keychain that tragically got cut off in the pic. the chopper and luffy pins are part of a set with the zoro one, and i wish i'd put them together instead of splitting them up. i'll probably rearrange this sometime and then i'll pt them all together. there's also another melanie martinez pin from a concert, and two more pokemon ones
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this thing came with one piece heroines, it's basically a second dust cover that advertises other one piece books. i kept it because of this cute nami drawing and oda's signature
also, the way i hang the button pins up is by sliding the wire piece behind a thumbtack :) please ignore my awfully chipped nail polish
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tumblr won't let me add more images so i'll have to do a second post for all my posters. sorry this was so fucking long i know literally nobody cares or will read it but i needed to ramble about all this somewhere :3 my animanga collection is my favorite thing ever in the world. also on the off chance that anyone who does care reads this, if anyone wants to know more about a specific thing (where i got it, how much it cost, etc) please send an ask or dm and i'd love to tell you!!!
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cathalbravecog · 9 months
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Man... I can't stop thinking about the things that were talked about on the stream, especially the answer on my question - so... get ready for a ramble! its a long one. oops. i dont even know where im going with this, im just dumping my thoughts somewhere. half is about ttcc lore in general and the streams, the other half is about cathal and me projecting onto him deeper.
before i even hop deeper into this, it wasn't until early today that i learned that there was a whole drama about cranky's answers (regarding the graham and flint question and the whole "keep it sane" thing. i thought it was...off, but i understood it as 'do what you want people, just don't start any harassment because of ships and your favorite pairs'.
definitely could have been phrased better, though. at least we got a good response and an apology later from maven on twitter. but i legit did not know this was a drama until those twitter posts were made LOL. i dont interact with the fandom so i do not know how that answer was percieved by most. or if anyone except for me and my friends have had any thoughts about the question i asked that got answered.)
and what im tryna get to is that i get cranky isnt the one to be answering lore things, and probably didnt know what to answer... but it's still something to think about
because being told "cogs and toons just dont become how they are out of the blue" (paraphrasing here) as an answer to what cathal initially thought of seeing his dad be bet up and thrown off a tower is... confusing? he did say first and foremost that it has to be built upon before saying that. i understand that this is... a lot of characters! and cathal did have some focus on him thanks to the comic and they wanted to focus on other managers... but some have deeper, more intricate lore that's easy to grasp (especially the more, well, angstier managers like chip and misty.)
and we have gotten some extra lore for other managers like belle, mary, tawny.... thanks to thomas' rambles.
and it's definitely difficult for a team of volounteers working hard on a fan game together to make lore for all the characters, that are still very young in their *life span*, having been around for less than a year. despite ttcc being more character driven and focused on the cogs, it's still a game they have to run so they cannot focus on lore only and some game management has to be done first. there's a bunch of things they have to consider, like consistency and how fans may react, or possible themes or what they want the story to be...
and. yeah. its hard since. come on lets admit it. clash has an issue with how these are all given to us. hell, there's lore bits i still dont know about and im still learning because it's..so all over the place. a new player will not know about it. maven acknowledged this in the tweet and i really appreciate that, as it's honestly been my number one issue with clash, especially as someone who is there for the lore. (i mean, and the gameplay, i know some people who don't play the game itself much. well i sure do a little TOO MUCH because i have PROBLEMS. but im interested in the lore, too, yknow?)
some lore you cant learn from the wiki, and unless you interact with the community, you may never learn *where* all of this even is. if you werent live for certain lore there, it's hardly accessible to you. lore locked behind one time events, an arg website, wikis, discord chats... all that. it's hard to keep track of! i'm sure it's like that for both the fans and the writers. these characters are great, fun, and i love them, but the way we are given this information is... not the best. it's very easy to miss certain details.
it's especially bad if you're like me - only ever interacting with a close group of people you trust, (because people are scary especially a lot of... lore driven fans. yeahnoimeanshippers.sorry.and just big crowds of people in general) having only gotten back into the game recently AFTER most of the major lore events (first played once in 2019, then never again until january 2023) and also you dislike youtube and video content, so you dont watch it. something in your brain would rather if you step on a nail than watch a playthrough video (especially with commentary).
like in general it shouldnt be necessary to go through all these hoops just to know the lore! especially for things that may have little lore...
anyways, uh, back to cathal. i cannot stop thinking about this.
it definitely wasnt an answer to what i specifically asked - but possibly more so about... why cathal is the way he is? and despite what my brain and low self esteem during hard times may tell me - i do not believe that anybody is truly "lazy". i just dont think that exists. there's always some reason behind a person being unmotivated or lazy. even the little things!
but like... that's just kinda obvious. all toons and cogs have motivations. thats like... one of the basics of writing characters. have motivations for characters and reasons for why they are how they are. doesnt have to be anything tragic, just.... how they are as people.
it's totally unrelated to the question of what cathal thought about seeing his dad like that... but oh well! i asked that because i made up my own story around that already, and i just wanted to see what someone working on the game thinks about the same idea.
not to be Tumblr User CathalBravecog, but, of course I have projected heavily onto cathal. i have already stated how important cathal is to me as a character, especially with appreciating myself when im.. not exactly the most motivated. when im not doing much. taught me to appreciate breaks. hell! i keep preaching this myself. its okay to take breaks! and yet i often end up not doing it and i overwork myself on games and art and other things.
there's... a lot of things "wrong" with me that i don't have names for yet, especially due to not having a diagnosis for them, but they're very real feelings and they cause me to be unable to do things a lot of the time. various mental blocks and a new member of the gang... physical pai! hooray.
this... endless productivity we are forced and expected to do. it can take a toll on you. breaks are just as necessary and to say it's a thing that has to be re-learned is... sickening. hooray for living in a Corporate (clash) society, fellas.
one thing i can say is that i absolutely headcanon that cathal has adhd - though, maybe not the same type i do. i do not think he gets randomly hyper and wants to (and does) jump around everywhere and blurt things out randomly and impulsively. cathal here has the low energy, yknow.
i like that a lot of the content around him doesnt even describe him with the words "lazy" and "sleepy" instead.
every day is the same... even if his job is relatively simple, just watching over the camera feed - it's definitely boring... and having to do it every day is not rewarding. and being mostly alone and without consequence, he gives into wanting to do something else. he's got these huge screens and a room to himself, and he loves watching shows and cartoons... so he's gonna do that. it's more fun. it's stimulating. and especially with his dad being the one to give him his position, he knows that he's got nothing to really worry about there.
i also think it's a bit hard to be motivated knowing that... this war between the cogs and toons is just. endless. hell, again, he has to see his dad *everyday* be attacked by them. his body damaged after the fall - only to be fixed again. rinse and repeat. i would too, find it pointless. especially if you're like cathal, since i pointed out before that he is very kind and caring towards the other cogs. he's also thoughtful, noting that yknow... a lot of stairs to get to his room.
why do all that when you can chill... and feel good. do something that feels nice...
i don't have any names for this, but with how sleepy he usually is, that's definitely a thing to consider too. and just, from experience... being tired and/or sleepy it... dismotivates you even more. its so hard to start tasks even if you *want* to do them. and considering cathal mooost likely doesn't want to do his work on his own - then these tasks can be just. impossible to start.
like, i have struggled with this my entire life myself, just because of my adhd screwing with everything, but after getting covid and most definitely getting a form of chronic exhaustion from it.. things have been even harder. i pull myself through day and i barely have the energy to even start anything. sometimes i dont even do anything all day and... woops! still no mood or energy to do anything. i just work on random bursts of motivation and things that captivate me...
not sure how it relates to cathal, but, hey, if im personal here ill ramble about it too because WOW it has been biting me in the ass and i need to speak to Professionals About It
like... i dont think hes being "lazy" willingly, yknow? theres a reason behind it. it definitely is just... being sleepy, the comfort... the fun and stimulation doing something fun he's interested in (his shows) are just... stronger desires and way easier for him to get to. why struggle through something when it takes up all your energy, and then you feel no reward for it? yeah. exactly. even just "not feeling like it" is a reson. "not having energy" is a reason. hey, are these things to get better about if needed? certainly. i wish i could get help with this, it would help me in my life so so much. but should it be seen as ENTIRELY negative and as being a "hinder to society". hell nah. and i think thats swag. cathal is swag he can do this, good for him lmaooo. my brain is deteriorating i apologize.
there was... another thing i wanted to say, but i forgot. so i'll move on.
but just... yeah. i dont think cathal is just lazy. i dont believe in "laziness". he's got reasons for why he prefers naps and just... watching tv instead of doing his work. perhaps he does want to do these things, but gave up on trying. its not worth the effort, it does not feel good. its not stimulating enough to keep him going.
#long#ramble#cathalposting#i...may delete this later i dont know. i both wanna talk to ppl i know about this#but also Do Not Percieve me. I am Afraid Of What People Think#Stay Back Foul Beasts !#alsoy eah i had other stuff to talk about...more on the negative side i guess but??? its. a bit difficult to#give and .. angstier things? negative thoughts? to a character who you see a lot of comfort in. they make you happy#they help you feel better about yourself. you want to see them happy. if theyre happy#youre happy. if theyre sad...well. you are sad. sadness is natural. its a real thing. it happens sometimes. its a part of life#and i have attached some of these things to cathal already. but a few things are hard for me to consider because of The Brain Worms.#i dont want to see him hurt either yknow.#anyways i hope you enjoyer my mental illness ramble. im not normal and you shouldve known that when you followed me#thank you for existing cathal ray toby braveswag#hey fun fact remember how i said i get tired of stuff myself easily well this whole thing made me tired. i was gonna#answer an ask but now im like. man. (melts into a puddle)#(doesnt take a break bc i need instant stimulation and makes things worse for myself)#do yall see why i like cathal so much now gamers?#ya. sorry this got personal. if any of you can handle reading this u deserve a reward.#and maybe i need to start talking about personal things this much. but whatever#this is my blog i can talk about anything and thats the COOL THING!#MWAHAHAHHAHAHA!#dies#ivegot a lot going on in my brain rn cant u tell
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mtngh0ul · 3 months
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𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙸'𝙳 𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙺𝙽𝙾𝚆 𝙱𝙴𝚃𝚃𝙴𝚁 !
favourite colours: red. i love red. i am also partial to green, some blues, and even though it's not a colour, black. most of my characters are themed around the colour red, actually, which makes mtn such an outlier in comparison lmao. it's ok tho, i fucking love my greens too! favourite genres: sci-fi and fantasy have always had my heart. oh, and historical stuff. the sci-fi thing has been sticking with me since i was little bc of stuff like jak & dexter and ratchet & clank, fantasy kinda started with this ps2 final fantasy game i have vague memories of + spyro, and historical stuff is traced back to assassin's creed and even god of war. and some western game. that's not even mentioning movies and stuff LMAO i live for these genres so much. favourite music: rock is EASILY the top for me. the artist most consistently in my top bands on spotify is linkin park, and that's because i was literally raised on that music. along with bon jovi, guns n roses, evanescence, nickelback... also no surprise that ghost just hits the Right Spot with their music, but my reigning artist this year was starset. and RIGHTFULLY SO. sci-fi electronic rock has been my absolute fucking jam and devolution has been on repeat. funny enough, my second type of music is pop, though i think that's mostly lady gaga... and then synthwave has been my more "unpopular" favourite genre. favourite films: ooh this is a tricky one... but one of my all-time top films is the original blade runner. i love dystopian futurism with all my heart, and i even read the short story it's based off of (do androids dream of electric sheep)! i also loved captain america the first avenger (periodic piece technically), aliens (SPECIFICALLY the second one), hellraiser up to three, the greatest showman, deadpool, inception, and uhhhh... yeah. most of my favoured fantasy things are game based. favourite series: ahem. westworld, altered carbon, dragon age: absolution, the legend of vox machina, house of the dragon... there's been a few. and look, listen, westworld was legit the first one i thought of because it was fucking AWESOME. getting my head around the first season was a nightmare, but it was so worth it because it has similar premises to blade runner and it's also meant to be in a world that mirrors the wild west? loved it. altered carbon gave me my sci-fi dystopian fix with some phenomenal storytelling imo, dragon age absolution may have been messy but the games have been a safe haven for me for SO LONG, and vox machina had me losing my mind. i watched it with my mother. (and i was thoroughly more entertained by hotd vs. got. thanks aleera!) last song: last song was talking in your sleep by the romantics, currently is square hammer by ghost! last series: i believe it was prehistoric planet with aleera! last movie: i think i sat down to watch nimona with aleera because she hadn't seen it before. i'm... pretty sure. i don't actually watch movies often anymore. currently reading: LMAO i don't read. oops. currently watching: not really anything, besides some youtube stuff. i haven't thought about picking up something new to watch.
tagged by: @divinehr ! thank u nerd tagging: ummm u
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knowlesian · 2 years
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ok, it doesn't look like anyone else asked, but i do want to know what your favorite jokes are (other than the genius crystal one)!!
A MILLION YEARS LATER and while i am drinking starbucks i have none to share, etc etc etc jokes.
and speaking of jokes (what a transition robert evans eat your heart out, shoutout to any other behind the bastards fans) here's another favorite on the list, since i've covered a couple since you sent this as i am wildly behind on asks, oops.
this time it's frenchie's response to stede trying to get everybody to say they'll talk it through as a crew.
(i feel like i read an interview with joel where he said that line was ad-lib, but i also might be entirely misremembering that. if i am not just making that up, as a writer sidenote i love how a lot of the improv moments seem to be done in the style of 'here's the basic thing going on, we will give you space on set to come up with the funniest version of it' nods from the writers. when you've got a cast like this let 'em rip, etc.)
frenchie has this cool thing going on where he's capable of both realistic codeswitching and what i am forced to call narrative codeswitching (mostly because i don't know what else to call it). if we attack things from the lens where ed and his crew switched metaphorical canons from gritty pirate drama to muppets, frenchie is the one who realizes that and asks ed if they're about to die instead of muppeting out about how cool it is that Thee Blackbeard is on their ship.
(in a fun beat since they're the other member of the crew ed keeps around, jim also identifies the potential of non-comedy stabbing but doesn't say anything about it until later, when frenchie has gone back into muppet mode and is nailing his sleeve to the deck.)
so: in order to codeswitch, you have to know how to speak your audience's language and hear what isn't being said. codeswitching is most often talked about in terms of literal language, but it doesn't stop there. behavior and piecing together what's going on behind the scenes nobody talks about are also part of it, because if you want to fit in you have to do what's expected of you; and in order to do that consistently, you have to understand what's expected of you.
whiiiich gets me to the actual joke and why it's even funnier coming from frenchie. because stede may tell other people to talk it through as a crew, but that's never his first move. stede tends to spill his guts when he's pushed into it; sometimes because somebody else went first, sometimes because intense circumstances and/or emotions overwhelm his instinct to lock everything down and insist he's fine.
stede does not talk it through as a crew. stede does backflips more than once to avoid talking things through with a variety of people over the season. stede bottles things up.
which is exactly what frenchie suggests stede wants them to do.
i should add that joel's delivery is great because this whole cast ringers all the way down, every goddamn person, but i'm obsessed with the way that takes a fun joke into a moment of telling us a lot about who frenchie is and what he's capable of, before we know anything else about him other than 'has a lute'.
he may not remember the rhyme, but he does know how to look past what people say to what they actually mean when that becomes necessary.
there's also a fun layer there where in-world we know frenchie learned the fine art of fancy people and their massive aggression because he was around them in a service capacity, so there's an in-world logic reason he is able to real world codeswitch between the world of Real Piracy and the world of aristocracy and think on his feet that echoes the thematic stuff working with the same theme on a more galaxy brain level.
i like this show a loooooot, the end.
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depizan · 1 year
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Some questions for you!
Fandom questions: Is Star Wars the only fandom you write for? Have you tried any others?
SWTOR questions: Why did you pick the smuggler/agent to interact the most in your stories? If you were to rank the canon class stories 1-8 with 1 being the best, where would those two class stories rank. Your Fic questions: Which characters are the easiest to write for? Is there a specific decision/scene you're struggling with now that's killing the inspiration? Do you still draw?
Oop, this got kind of long.
Fandom:
Star Wars is the only fandom I've written for. Unless you count the crossover between Star Wars and Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers I wrote a million years ago back in high school, before I knew fanfic was a thing. (Mad science caused portals between universes, I think? It was a verrrrry long time ago.)
Though, I have done a few one-off "how things could've gone" things when discussing fiction on line that got detailed enough to count as fanfic. At least one for Narnia did.
SWTOR:
Kyrian, Jezari, and Savler were the first characters I created when I started playing, so they were the first characters who really became characters. And when it came to fic, Kyrian and Jezari were set up nicely to continue interacting. (Granted, that would be true of Jezari and Savler as well, since I created them as friends.) They also ended up being the right kind of characters for the kind of stories I usually write.
I'm going to rank Agent as 1. It basically nailed it on all counts. It had a solid idea and themes and executed them well. The story feels like a coherent whole, feels Star Warsy without duplicating any existing Star Wars thing, and has enough give in it for the player to shift the tone a bit depending on their choices. It also feels like there's room for a really broad variety of characters as the Agent. (I admit it helps that the nature of the story leaves a lot of room for why your character says what they do.) It's not flawless, but most of my complaints also apply to the game as a whole, and even where it could have been better, it never drops below decent/good.
Smuggler is...oh god, how do I rank the Smuggler story? The only thing it nails consistently is tone. Everything else is a hot mess. That said, I find it more enjoyable to play than some of the stories that are more coherent. And it does feel like Star Wars, so the worst I could rank it would be a 7. Also, its best moments are quite good. It's just that it has no focus, doesn't seem to know what it's doing most of the time, has too many "we did this just because Han Solo" bits, and has some other bits that are absolute WTFery. Also, while I haven't played a male!Smuggler, watching YouTubes of it makes me never want to. I don't know. I guess we average things and call it a 5.
Fic:
Jezari and Kyrian (another reason why they feature in fic so much).
I think my general tendency to second guess everything is most of what's killing my inspiration. Though, wrecking Kyrian's life has made things a little more of a challenge, both because that ended one source of tension and because the usual paths back from that sort of thing (for fictional characters) aren't right for him. (Also it makes the Empire a scarier threat. Damn, they really could kill you horribly. Which, I mean, nothing actually changed. It just the weird effect going even mildly "reality ensues" has on things.)
Technically, I still draw. I just don't very often. I stopped long enough that I'm all squidgy about starting up again. Though I did draw my character for a coworkers one-shot D&D game:
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hi!! i really love your blog, i love reading your posts, your analysis... after the most recent chapters, couldn't help but wonder how you would be feeling about megumi's fate. his character has also intrigued me so much, i find the implications of his paths and of his world view so interesting - even though i strongly disagree with most of it today, i really identify my past self with him, and sometimes also my present self - he makes me think and feel so much about life, my life, my relationships, identity, choices, traumas etc.... it's been rough with the last chapters.. anyway, i know the possibilities are not exactly on our side, regarding his fate/ending, but i can't help but wonder how fulfilling it would feel like to see more development from him. yes, a lot of development was made, but he has repeated some fateful mistakes, and i think, if he didn't die, that we would be yet to see him build for himself a new philosophy, a new fundamental understanding of the world and his place in all of it, making different choices and taking different paths. i also know a lot of characters don't get this chance (or don't take this chance) before ......dying, but this time, i would really like to see him changing and growing, learning even more from his mistakes.. what do you think about this? is there anything in particular you would like to see about his character development? if you have the time, i would love to hear your thoughts about it! really sorry for making this ask so long though!!! xx
HOLA!
So... first, thank you for sending Megumi love ♥, I love it when people share with me why they love the characters they love, ESPECIALLY if it's about Megumi.
Second, your ask gives me life in so many ways. Thank you for the kind words and taking the time to reach out.
So let's see... "how are you feeling about Megumi's fate?" you ask.
This is what I'll say above the cut.
I really hope there will be a moment of "poetic justice" that underscores and gives meaning to what happened to Megumi. I don't know that, of course, but I feel like it's consistent with how Gege writes... even if he flops the ending.
More word vomit under the cut...
After all... there's meaning in everything but if only we choose to create it in the face of the existential dread that is the chaos of the human experience.
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After keeping up with this manga for the better part of nearly three years, I've fallen in love with Gege's writing style for several reasons.
The main reason is that JJK is very dark and gritty but not for the sake of dark and gritty per se. Rather, JJK is dark and gritty for the sake of characters exploring and giving meaning to the existential dread that comes from the circumstances of the world Gege has created.
So... to me... this alone tells me that even if Megumi were to die and even if the execution is lackluster (think chapter 208), it won't feel like an inconclusive ending once it's all been said and done.
Megumi isn't Aki after all, and Gege isn't Fujimoto.
As you say, "i know the possibilities are not exactly on our side, regarding his fate/ending" and what I'll say is that it's not that I don't trust that Megumi can do amazing #things like getting back control of his body. It's the cursed cat that I don't trust because he will kill any character off if the themes he is trying to depict call for it in the plot.
There IS good reason to think that, thematically, Megumi is getting out alive (for the sake of meaning-making) AND I STILL DON'T TRUST THE CAT AFTER WHAT HE DID IN CHAPTER 212!
Also...
Oops, I did it again, I typed a whole response to your ask, and then the chapter 214 leaks started dropping and I had to go back and delete what I had written.
So if you haven't seen the leaks/spoilers for chapter 214 you might want to wait until Sunday to read the rest of my response.
The thing is... I also wasn't sure how Jungian I wanted to get in my response to you.
So after much debate I decided to get Jungian af... After all, you bared your own soul to me. Why shouldn't I do the same? So... there will be personal rambling lol.
BASICALLY this is how I'm excusing myself for always taking forever to answer asks lol. In the end, I just want to give thoughtful and insight provoking answers if at all possible.
So thanks for your patience. You were never for a moment forgotten.
Anyways... as I like to say: without further ado...
You see, I have this condition...
You see, I have this condition... and I feel like you can relate.
But this condition--I call it character myopia, its main symptom is that when I love a character with my entire sense of self, I can't tell where a character begins and where I end.
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his character has also intrigued me so much, i find the implications of his paths and of his world view so interesting - even though i strongly disagree with most of it today, i really identify my past self with him, and sometimes also my present self - he makes me think and feel so much about life, my life, my relationships, identity, choices, traumas etc
Everything you've said about how you relate to him, from his life, to his relationships, identity choices and traumas... yes. Thank you for sharing your Megumi love with me.
Honestly, since we're having this convo. idk about you, but it's not often that I love a character to the point of seeing myself in them.
I don't know that there is a whole lot more that I can add to this. I just love what you said so much.
This has got to be one of my favorite parts about experiencing works of fiction and deeply resonating with certain characters.
Fiction can be such a transformative experience and Megumi has been just that for me and it seems for you as well. I love that in Megumi, Gege has created a character that is a container for exploring ourselves creatively.
I agree with the sentiment of identifying with him.
I think for me, right now... I am going through a phase in my life where, like Megumi, I keep bumping my head up against my own self-inflicted limitations.
In addition, in Megumi I have found a reflection of my own darker instincts.
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I don't know how to explain what Megumi has done to my psyche. Literally... it's like he's working behind the scenes in transforming how I see the world.
I've literally had dreams with Megumi in them that also include black and white dog symbolism. In retrospect, the dreams have felt archetypal, like a reflection of psychic processes I am unaware of that are working underneath the surface and transforming my consciousness.
With Megumi getting possessed came a new dream with clear satanic symbolism that I thought was really interesting. More specifically because I wasn't scared to face what I saw in myself.
i can't help but wonder how fulfilling it would feel like to see more development from him. yes, a lot of development was made, but he has repeated some fateful mistakes, and i think, if he didn't die, that we would be yet to see him build for himself a new philosophy, a new fundamental understanding of the world and his place in all of it, making different choices and taking different paths
Yes 🥺🙏🏼! This. All of this.
You made me realize I want to see him believe in himself again. When Megumi believes in himself, literal magic happens.
And going back to what is happening at the end of chapter 214, I cannot wait to see Megumi wreck Sukuna from the inside.
There's so much happening for Megumi right now, and he's told the audience before that he will do whatever it takes to protect the people he holds in high esteem.
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That's my boy!!!!!!!!!!
So to your point... I love that he will not go down without putting up a fight as he re-negotiates this new philosophy about himself.
YES!
Again, it's not that I don't trust that Megumi has what it takes, it's the cat I don't trust!!!!
i would really like to see him changing and growing, learning even more from his mistakes.. what do you think about this? is there anything in particular you would like to see about his character development?
Yeah, for sure. This is a bit of a loaded question because there's so much about Megumi that still needs to unfold in terms of how he relates to the world around him.
I personally love how Gege has gone out of his way to show how immature Megumi is compared to other characters who share the same trope. Megumi is a flawed human after all.
And aren't we all?
In the end, Megumi has to grow in many different aspects like...
How he relates to his own power.
The limits of his own sense of self and how he uses his imagination to overcome how his sense of self can become unnecessarily bound by reason.
The much needed growth he needs to achieve in how he relates to others (more specifically Tsumiki and how that is a metaphor for how he relates to his own emotional world).
Bridging opposites together (good and evil).
Taking responsibility for himself and his actions...
I mean there's just so much!
If Megumi dies at this point... ok, yes, and "what meaning will Gege give his death?" is what I would like to know to feel like it was a satisfying end to his arc.
Honestly. I just want to see Megumi work his magic. I want to see him get pissed off, like really pissed off and fed up with his fate, and I want to see how that changes him and what he makes of it.
I want to see him say "fuck this fate, I still have things I need to do."
And then maybe perhaps come to realize, once again, that he can't manipulate others because they too have a free will of their own.
I may be projecting here but... Megumi's manipulative tendencies and the way he relates to others, it feels like it comes from a place in which his inner-child has not learned that it does not need to do anything to fulfill his need to be loved.
Megumi is beloved, and its a real tragedy that he hasn't figured that out about himself.
And... if that is not relatable, then I don't know what is.
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AH but thank you so much again for reaching out! Thank you for your patience too.
I hope to hear from you again especially as we get to see what our Megumi does!
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villanevehaus · 1 year
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Is there any au incoming with borrowed boots supposed wrapping? Or any new work at all? I don't care if it's your favourite omelette recipe I just want something x
i have my nbc hannibal au Tell Me, Eve which is ongoing! currently sitting at 117k and just getting started, updates once or twice a month. i'll also continue updating Undoing as well as Meteor/ites sporatically, there are a few holiday themed ones on the way. lowkey ill probably be doing a followup work similar to meteor/ites with borrowed boots oops.
im not super into omelettes but i make baby dutch pancake like once a week as follows:
½c flour, ½c sugar, ¼tsp salt in one bowl
½c milk, ¼tsp vanilla extract, 3 eggs mixed
whisk the wet ingredients into the dry bowl until it's even consistency. pour into a buttered baking thing (bread pan, cake tin, whatever idk) and bake at 450° F for 15-20mins (depending on ur baking thing shape) until its brownish at the edges :)
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97-liners · 1 year
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ok I listened to the recs, thank you for that btw <333, so far i think nct u is my fave unit just cause i'm absolutely obsessed with misfit (and ok! and 90s love) but i both don't know who's in that unit and don't really understand the concept of the unit (side note i think i have successfully gotten to the point where i can recognize and name all of the 127s just from seeing them on my dash all the time even if i just found out that jungwoo existed like yesterday oops ) from the songs you recommended you're so right back 2 u is CRAZY especially the bridge + final chorus and love on the floor is also super fun (second side note i feel bad that i didn't know they could sing like that but to be fair their title tracks, or at least the title tracks i've heard, are NOT doing them justice) but yeah overall i think i prefer their rap heavy songs and uh mark if you're reading this i'm free on saturday which is the day that i am free which is saturday (third side note i am choosing to ignore the fact that johnny is from northbrook because i am 100% sure that someone in my life has probably met him before and i refuse to ever have less than 5 degrees of separation with any idol)
my next goal is to learn about wayv, the only things i know is a. they get diarrhea a lot and share that information frequently??? b. ten is shorter than i thought he'd be and c. that video of xiaojun vlogging in a flood
i was gonna answer this ask this morning but then i forgot so. <3 i can't believe i'm seeing noa nctzen transformation in real time. nct u is like,,,, a changing subunit and imo the coolest thing about the whole nct concept. like, depending on the theme of the comeback, the nct unit could have different members. misfit, ok!, and 90's love all have different lineups, tho i think mark is the one member that's in all three.
tbh i think nct as a whole is great for people who are fans of concept groups, because nct is sooo flexible yet consistent for that. like, 127's sound isn't unique anymore but they were doing boy group noise music since 2016, back when people were using noise music as an insult for them. wayv has such a consistent sound and concept (and tbh the only nct unit with lore) and nct dream.... used to have a very strong concept but now just makes generic 4th gen boy group music but i digress
also. wayv and 127 are definitely the music units, and wayv is my bias unit. they're having a comeback soon!!! imo all their title tracks are good (except regular chinese version) but my favorites are take off, moonwalk, and turn back time. second tier wayv title tracks would be bad alive and kick back. and.... that's all for wayv.
AND ALSO, SAME ABOUT JOHNNY LJFDSAKJFDSL he went to glenbrook north !! and he graduated in 2013 and i graduated in 2015 and i'm very sure our degrees of separation is like. one. if he went to IMEA or science fair or model un or scholastic bowl, then we might have even met at state or smth.
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plutothe-pup · 3 months
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RP RESOLUTIONS AND HABITS:
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TW: .........i used a lot of memes............im sorry. idk how to be serious. im in a silly goofy mood idk. do u see the header u know what u signed up for ok
Real TW: very minor drug mentions.
Write your RPer Resolutions for 2024! (What are some goals for yourself as a writer? Improve descriptions? Plot with more members? Etc.)
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Once again, I am asking myself to learn how to plot. That is going to be the theme here, just wait. Seriously though, I am pretty terrible at it. I do not like to approach people because I am........... idk weird. I am somehow anti-social even online and tend to just sit there twiddling my thumbs instead of reaching out. It's been a problem for me for literally ever. Sometimes I even get scared when people reach out to ME. But one year maybe we will get there. I also want to get back to regular activity. I've been really slipping these past few ... well, years I feel. I want to be more consistent at the very least, and not just post, disappear, spam, disappear, etc. I know I say this every time - but maybe just once: do a big plot. Do a big plot for yourself buddy. You can do it. Best Supporting character's get a sequel spin-off series one day, right. Just do it. JUST DO IT. I also feel like my writing recently compared to years ago has gotten poorer in quality. Idk what that's all about but I would like to improve that. Make proofreading a thing for me again 2024 or whatever.
me @ myself:
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Write at least one resolution, or “goal,” that you have as an RPer for your character(s):
Oh - you....... you think I have GOALS? (tbh I think they align with my character's own. We're on the SAME TEAM)
Greg: RECONNECT WITH HIS PARENTS. This was like a silent plot I started literally over a year ago where Gregory got more and more distant with his parents until they stopped talking entirely and he moved out to live at R2F. He's been on and off about trying to reach out - and this is the year to do it. Also probably come to terms a bit more with his relationship with Zero. He's comfortable in it and loves Zero very much - but there's that voice in the back of his mind still saying that he'll leave. Sebastian: Get over his crush on Lo that he did to himself. I want him to fully accept uncle life. To get over his fear of hurting people. Milo: BREAK. HIS. CURSE. .........nah. That's not my goal for him this year lmfao. I want him to find his passion, actually. Will it be in working out and being a jock? Does he actually have a fond passion for cooking? Does he yearn for theater? Fawn: Get her into TROUBLE. I didn't really do much with this yet, but she's a TROUBLE MAKER. She's nearly been kicked out the hollow for god's sake. She is a TERROR. It's time to UNLEASH IT.
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Write at least one resolution IN CHARACTER for your characters. What do THEY want to accomplish or change in the New Year?
Greg: Reconnect and apologize to his parents - but to do that... kick the minor drug problem first. Sebastian: Don't die. (.....i can't stress enough this man doesn't have outlooks) Milo: BREAK. MY. CURSE. Fawn: Discover a new creature in Enchantra! Befriend the creature! Train the creature! Sick the creature on Eboshi so it eats her and the forest is free again :)
List one or more characters you have never interacted with that you would like to do so:
.....disclaimer: I have bad memory now. soooooo. if we did interact and I list u here I am so sorry i am so so so so sorry.
Clarion: For obvious reasons, and also as stated above - Fawn is on mighty thin ice in the Hollow, so I think any interactions between them would be great and funny. And........ well maybe she gets kicked out oops. Doc: I'm not counting twitter interactions - I just think because of the whole Luca thing, I feel like Doc has flip flopped on his opinion of Milo multiple times and it would be funny for them to finally meet and talk. (and prove he's a good boi!) Any of TAM'S characters strictly because - I believe u have escaped me so far. Eluded. (That's not hard, as we discussed in point 1 I am very inconsistent) That should change!! ....I am sure the format of this post is very enticing...... sorry.
Talk a bit about your plotting style – what plots are you most drawn to? Do you prefer to come with a fully-formed idea and plot off that, or throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks?
And here dear reader we return to the beginning again. Roll credits: oh man, I simply do not. I am by default a 'buckle your seatbelts and lets just see wtf happens' kind of person simply because I am SO BAD at plotting in the first place! So many of my 'plots' revolve around other people's well equipped talents, or throwing my characters at opens/events/etc and seeing what disaster strikes. I'm just doing drive bys at all times of day.
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Talk a bit about character relationships – what relationships are you most drawn to? How do you prefer to approach shipping (if at all!)? What, specifically, are you looking for right now for your character relationships? 
I love just good old fashion friendship and family relationships! Like I adore the relationship Milo has with Pip/King/Luca. The Greg/Jun relationship, Sebby and his bros. I think it's pure and good and writing BFFs getting into dumb things is my favorite. I also like BEEF. I am a fan of rough-housing so to speak. Drama? Sure. Pile it up. Beef? Grudges. Fights. Whatever. It is okaaaaay. I love a good ol' beefin' between people. Same as above. I barely plot as it is - but when I do, it's definitely not relationships/shipping. In fact, I don't really 'ship'. i don't plan around ships, I don't get characters for ships, I don't anticipate ships. If one develops while throwing fruit--- I mean characters at other people, then that's great! That's how.......... both of my current relationships are! Phineas and Fawn were completely random and not at all my intention but they vibed from the start and it happened to work out in the timeline. Gregory and Zero were incredibly unlikely but started talking here and there, and Z and I didn't really say........ anything to each other at all until they were kissing in Pixie's and even then - we didn't think they'd become a #thing. ..........which they did. So I'm pretty much just...... looking to expand on the ones I have? Explore Phawneas a bit and see what on earth is going on inside their head, see where Glo takes us. ............figure out if Seahound can survive not jumping each other's bones forever.
Plotting Exercise! Pick one of the resolutions/goals in #3 and plan a rough guideline to how you could accomplish it.
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..........what if I said no, huh? I'm so BAD at this (it all comes back to it yanno)
GREG TALKS TO HIS PARENTS:
GREGORY and ZERO have a discussion post-Zero's parents coming to town, where ZERO tries to prod about what is going on between GREG and his parents, and Greg comes clean to him about the fight that happened between them. Zero gently offers to go with him to talk to them but Greg doesn't think it's time yet.
Still too uncertain, GREG asks IAN if his mum has said anything about Aubrey, or about Greg. He tries to gauge if his parents have been talking about him to their friends, if they're upset, or if they've moved on.
PLOT CALL: Gregory anonymously looks into sources for mental health, and tries to find people with experience in the same struggles he's had. He either forms or joins an anonymous online/twitter support group for such problems / group therapy.
Having overheard various times through the grapevine, GREG finds and approaches TAD to see if he can talk to him about his recovery and sobriety and find advice/guidance for that path.
Knowing that he might get the most brutal honest answers, GREG confides in JUN and asks his advice on what he should do or how he should handle it.
GREG finally bites the bullet and drags JUN and ZERO to his parents house for support to talk to them again after over a year of radio silence.
PHEW. A tough one.
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Anyways. ...........................
my deepest apologies again. idk what happened. this did start serious but then it went off the rails. it's sincere between all the...... whatever that is.
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russburlingame · 6 months
Text
A is for Accident
So, here goes.
A few weeks back, I was supposed to have started work on the Alphabet Superset, a project from Struthless that's aimed at helping motivate artists who are a little...stuck.
I am, strictly speaking, not stuck. I actually have more on my plate than I can handle most of the time. Still, it seemed like a cool project, and something that could help me hone some writing muscles that I don't use very often. I have a fiction project that has been percolating in the back of my mind, but it has been literally years since I wrote more than a few pages of fiction. And longer than that since I showed it to anyone.
So. The Alphabet Superset. It's a weekly challenge format, where you have a consistent theme and approach to the art, and each week you come up with a piece of work representative of that week's letter of the alphabet. I SHOULD have just started with D -- especially since I know what D is, and it's exciting! -- but I also know myself well enough to know that if I bail on A through C, I'll probably do basically none of the letters down the line.
Recently, I have been going through a bunch of my old archives to see whether there are any diamonds in the rough. So my "style" is going to be creative writing -- fiction and creative nonfiction, mostly not journalism, which is what I do the rest of my life. And the theme I'm choosing is autobiography. That doesn't mean you're going to get a lot of stuff that's super revealing about me -- although there will be some of that. It means each project will speak to a theme, an idea, or sometimes an archival project that was significant to a part of my life.
For the first installment, I'm going with "A is for Accident." The accident in question? A first-time hitman kills the wrong guy.
Oops.
This is a reworking of the first bit of 'I Got Him,' a novel I wrote once...but didn't back up before my computer was stolen. Back in the 2000s, not everything was always being loaded to the cloud. That was a rough lesson to learn, kids!
The only part of 'I Got Him' that survived was the first 40 or so pages. And I have always fantasized about bringing it back to life. This is not entirely new content, but a piece of the original version, lightly edited. I may tweak and hone a little more during a future week, but the hope here is to get myself back on track for the Alphabet.
So...here we go.
Oh, and this story takes place around 2003.
CHAPTER ONE: Somebody Got Murdered
  “I got him,” Martin said into the phone. “Just like you wanted, I got him!”
  “You didn’t,” Alderman said coolly, the background buzz of a crappy payphone not enough to mask his irritation.
  “Best part?” Martin continued, undeterred. “I knew the bastard! Fucking comes into McVeigh’s all the time and gives me shit because his burger has mayonnaise. Like I can help it that nobody reads the ‘special order’ line.”
  Alderman sighed. “What are you talking about?”
  “What, I gotta say it?”
  “That’s what I’m asking for.”
  “How do I know the phone’s not bugged?” Martin asked, and instinctively looked around as he said it.
  “Why on earth would it be?”
  “Alright, fine….I killed the Zlomek guy for you.”
  “Somehow I’m guessing that one of us has got something very confused here,” Alderman said, sarcasm starting to creep in around the edges of his frustration.
  “How do you mean?”
  “I’m very busy right now, actually. Can I call you back?”
  “Oh, right, right. Fine. But we’re solid here, right? You’re going to make sure I don’t get blamed for this?”
  “I really do have to go. I have a friend from work here right now,” Alderman said.
  “Oh,” Martin said. “Didn’t realize. Sorry!” And then, after a pause, “We’re not on speakerphone or anything, right?”
  “No, no. Eugene Zlomek is here, is all, and he’s telling me about his plans for the weekend. I think I’ve mentioned him before, right? A business acquaintance from the City.”
  Martin felt his stomach fall into his testicles. “Fuck,” he said.
  “That’s right.” The happiness in Alderman’s voice was the kind you only heard when businessmen were placating a customer, or an employee. Professional Happiness.
  “How about I’ll call you tonight, okay? Have a drink and unwind while you wait, alright?”
  Franklin Alderman didn’t wait for Martin to respond before hanging up. Martin had said, “Ri—” before realizing that nobody was on the other end, and then hung up with a petulance rarely seen in a grown man. He tapped the end of his rifle impatiently against the side of the phone booth for a minute, but his mind was moving too fast to remain focused on that, and he inadvertently put the barrel through the thin plastic panel.
  The Verizon logo on the outside of the phone broke outward and away from the booth and bits of plastic rained on Martin’s hair. The reason it had rained on his hair, rather than on his shoes, is that when he heard the sound of the plastic popping and breaking away, he hit the ground in terror, dropping the gun. He was convinced that, somehow, it had gone off in the booth. Having no bullets in the chamber, though, the gun of course hadn’t go off, and continued not to do so when dropped. Suddenly he wondered what the hell he had been doing carrying the murder weapon around with him in the open to begin with.
  Martin picked it up and forced it into his long, over-packed gym bag. It was nylon-and-mesh, and intended for use by baseball players (hence the length to accommodate a gun). It was loaded up with shorts and towels, on the off chance that anyone should want to take a look through it and Martin couldn’t dissuade them. The bag had a Champion logo on the top of it, which Martin couldn’t help but feel was a little ironic riding next to his face at the moment, while he tried to figure out how he botched his job so badly and who, exactly, he had killed.
  He jogged to his car—a red, 1991 Ford Mustang LX waiting at the curb about fifteen feet from the payphone—and jumped in. He tossed the Champion bag in the back and shifted gears all at the same time, in one motion as though the release of the bag by his left arm had caused the right one to pull the lever between his front seats. The car failed to roar to life, but gurgled a bit, and rolled down the street in the way that 1991 Mustangs are wont to do.
  The street was well-lit for the night drive home, and Martin was thinking of his terrible mistake, wondering what would happen next, when he saw the lights of a police car in his rearview mirror. He looked at the digital clock he had fastened to the dash when all of the vehicle’s interior lighting had failed months before. It read 1:39, which meant it had been a little more than forty-five minutes since Martin had killed someone who was not Eugene Zlomek.
  He grabbed the pack of cigarettes from his dashboard and took one out. He lit it with a Zippo from his jacket pocket because the cigarette lighter in the Mustang had been removed by the previous owner, who thought he had been improving the transmission at the time. He rolled down the passenger side window and blew the smoke from his cigarette in that direction. He leaned onto the passenger seat and opened the glove box.
The police officer, carrying a flashlight that was completely unnecessary given the intensity of the spotlight he had pointed at Martin’s rearview mirror, used it to tap on the driver’s side window. Martin opened the driver’s door a crack and half-shouted out it.
  “The window doesn’t open, Officer,” Martin apologized. “Wiring’s all screwed.”
  “Can I see your license, registration and insurance card, please?” The policeman asked, with no clear indication that he understood or cared what Martin had said about the state of the Mustang.
  “Absolutely. Hold on a minute.” Martin felt a cold sweat coming on as he rifled through the open glove box. He coughed a little on the cigarette, as he didn’t smoke. Instead, he had lit up to mask the odor of smoke in the car.
  Having worn gloves for the killing, Martin thought that maybe they would have gunpowder residue on them, and started the light them on fire in the bushes outside the
Zlomek house. But when people inside realized that someone—not, apparently, Eugene
Zlomek—had been killed, they started to mill around by the window and Martin had felt
obliged to get out of there, carrying—in his dazed panic and hurry—his flaming gloves
with him. The smell of smoke was very strong in the car, and he had made use of some
very old, very cheap cigarettes a friend had left in the car months ago. He sat upright in
the driver’s seat, passing his license and insurance card to the patrolman outside.
  “I can’t find the registration,” Martin said. “Can you take it off the windshield?”
  The patrolman shone his unnecessary flashlight at the windshield to confirm that
there was, in fact, a registration on the car. “I’ll get it from the plates,” he said, and
walked to the front of the car, shining the flashlight some more.
  The officer walked back to the open door. “Where is your front license plate?”
He asked.
  “Vanished a few weeks ago; haven’t had time to report it,” Martin said honestly.
  “You’d better.”
  “I will.”
  “Next time,” the cop warned, “you’ll get a ticket.”
  “Is that why you pulled me over, Officer?”
  “I’ll tell you when I get back.”
  “I wasn’t speeding, was I?”
  “I’ll talk to you when I get back,” the officer said, increasingly frustrated.
  The patrolman walked back to his car, clicking the flashlight on and off, and then
sat in the driver’s seat for what seemed to Martin to be a very long time. Finally he got
out of the car, still hefting his flashlight.
  “What’s that smell?” Asked the police officer when Martin reopened the door for
him.
  “Smell?”
  “Smoke. Do you have an exhaust problem, too?”
  “Not that I know of. Maybe my cigarette?”
  “Is it cloves or something?” The cop asked.
  “No, just very cheap.”
  “Hm. Maybe.” He straightened up. “Mr. Bidwell, do you know why I pulled
you over?”
  “Because I have no front license plate?” Martin ventured.
  “No.”
  “Oh. In that case, I’m not really sure.”
  “Have you been drinking?”
  “No. Absolutely not. I’ve never had a drink in my life.”
  “That sounds very defensive,” said the police officer, shining his flashlight around
inside the car.
  “No, Officer. Just definitive.”
  “Do your headlights work?”
  Martin looked at the switch on his dashboard which controlled the headlights. It
was in the “Off” position.
  “Shit,” Martin said.
  “That’s what I thought when I saw you barreling down the road like that,” said the
patrolman.
  “I just pulled away from the gas station about two miles back. This is a very well-
lit road…!”
  “I understand. Are you related to Jonathan Bidwell?”
  “My second-cousin.”
  “His father was on my softball team last year.”
  “Mike’s a great guy.”
  “Yeah….I’m not going to ticket you tonight. Just be a little more with-it, okay?”
  “Thanks.”
  “No problem. And get your exhaust checked. I don’t think that’s tobacco.”
  “Thanks.”
  The patrolman walked back to his car and sat in it while Martin pulled back into traffic, turning on his headlights and blinker. In the back seat, the odor of the burning evidence still lingered. He left the passenger window down to get rid of it.
-----
  “…But it’s trash, Doug!” Irwin shouted.
  Irwin Shaw was sitting on a rolling chair in an office of white-painted concrete,
shouting emphatically at a stooped, wrinkled man whose white, bushy hair and lively eyes left even his best friends wondering how old he actually was. The man, his editor, walked away toward his own office and Irwin stood to follow him.
  “It doesn’t matter if it’s trash, Shaw,” Doug told him. “What you did was unwarranted.”
  “Completely unwarranted,” Irwin agreed, in a way that expressed a total lack of enthusiasm for, or interest in, Doug’s assessment.
  “You wrote—let’s see…” Doug rustled papers around on his desk theatrically until he found one that he wanted. He squinted at it, opened his mouth to speak and then closed it again.
Then he threw that paper at the ground, and picked up another one instead. He looked pleased with this new acquisition.
“You wrote, ‘…where the only thing greasier than the fish fry and warm beer is the middle-aged barmaid who flirts with everyone under eighty.’”
“It’s true. The facts all check; I have quotes from seven regular customers.”
“I don’t care about your ridiculous quotes. You know you can’t say that shit.”
“Why not?”
“You know damned well why not,” Doug growled, withdrawing a pair of reading glasses from his paper-covered desk and putting them on top of his head as if he may wear them eventually, but not right now.
“I can’t tell the truth about the places I’m supposed to ‘review’ because they’re our advertisers and they might get mad if someone points out how shitty their bars really are.”
Irwin had used air quotes to emphasize his point when he said the word “review.”
“Not bars, Irwin. Clubs.”
“Three quarters of what you send me to cover for the ‘Local Clubs’ column are just crappy bars that have local cover bands playing on systems too loud for the rooms they’re in.”
“Tanner’s called. They won’t advertise with us anymore.”
“That’s not such a bad thing,” Irwin said. “I don’t think I would want our paper associated with that dive anyway.”
“No, no, no. That’s a very bad thing. Where do you think your salary comes from?”
“Salary?! You’re crazy. I get twenty bucks a story. That’s not a salary, that’s money for gas and food to get to, and then do, the story. And the food’s hardly ever any good. But I’m not complaining about the money, trust me. Play money for play journalism. It all makes sense.”
“I told you when you took over this column that the food is free at the clubs you’re writing up,” Doug sighed, putting his head in his hands and knocking the reading glasses askew, then taking them off and putting them back on the desk.
“I’m glad you think that; the bar owners don’t seem to have been told.”
There was a knock on the door, and a young, husky man with very black hair came in wearing a t-shirt that said, “Dammit—I Did Not Have Sexual Relations With That Woman Either.”
The young man said, “Mister Hooper? We really need you out here. It’s almost two,” and left in such a hurry, it was obvious that he was either very busy, or hoping to dodge Doug’s reply.
“Okay, Irwin. You’re off this column.”
“Doesn’t that have to wait until the real editors get here in the morning?” Irwin asked with a smirk.
“No. You run in my edition. And I already talked to Brad.”
“So, I’m fired?”
“No, you still have your other column.”
“Gee, thanks. You know, that one was also a lot more interesting before you guys started to get…”
Doug cut him off. “…And for the next few weeks, until we figure out what else you’re good for, I want you on newsdesk during this shift.”
“What?”
“General assignment.”
“I’m—what? Demoted? How does that even work, when you pay by the story?”
“Not demoted. The new Local Club writer came out of that slot. I just need you there until we fill it.”
“Roger is taking over the Club column?” Irwin choked on the statement, and caught his body trying to laugh without permission.
“Yes. Is there a problem with Roger, too?”
“Not at all, Doug. It suits him.”
“What the hell’s that supposed to mean?” Doug asked, a vein in his head starting to throb.
“Your nephew’s not really a reporter, he’s just the nephew of an editor.”
Doug's face started to turn red, and he rose in from his seat, but Irwin continued. “That column isn’t really reporting, as I said, just kind of masturbation of our sponsors…”
The young man came back to the doorway, still looking harried. “Mister Hooper? It’s almost two.”
“Still?” Doug shouted.
The young man missed the sarcasm, and paused for a second before darting away to process it, as though the question might be a trick.
“…Yes?” He responded hesitantly.
“I’m coming,” Doug said to the young man, and then to Irwin he said, “Get out of my office. I just got like nine e-mails in two minutes, so something must be happening. Go check the places you go check.”
“Will do, Skipper. By the way, nice office you have here.”
“Yeah, Doug said, ushering everyone out the door. “It used to be a bathroom, but the Department of Health said it was too small for that. Now get out of it.”
“I see,” Irwin said, “You’ve gotta take a leak.”
Doug slammed the door.
Irwin walked around the corner behind him and was standing next to the computers that were set to receive e-mails from wire services, freelance writers and letters to the editor. Two of them were idling, waiting for a password to unlock them so that they may crash freely. On a third, there was an e-mail program open. This, Irwin knew, was the computer that John Ramsay, the editor in charge of the Op-Ed section, used to receive all of his e-mail. Irwin sat in front of the computer and looked up the e-mail preferences.
Ramsay had set the computer, apparently, to filter out pornography, letters from a recently-fired Sentinel employee and anything with a subject heading containing nasty language. Irwin knew that there had been some very, very unpleasant language used in a some recent letters to the editor, mostly directed at Ramsay’s mother after a story he’d written on why it was necessary to enforce dog-leash laws that were already on the city’s books. Irwin changed the settings so that anything containing any one of several nasty words would be forwarded to Ramsay’s home e-mail account and marked with a little red flag that said “Urgent!” if you held the mouse over it for a second.
He also turned on an auto-reply feature that would tell anyone e-mailing letters to the editor that The Editor had been “…eaten by a rampaging groundhog, and that future e-mails should be directed to:” and then Ramsay’s personal e-mail address again.
He skated sideways on the rolling chair, then, and punched his own password into another computer to see what had been coming in while he was in Doug’s office.
A few headlines popped onscreen: “Fire at Soup Company Kills 11.” “Classical Pianist Arthur Dent Dies at Age 67.” “French Language More Prevalent In Michigan, Study Shows.”
He printed off each of these and left them sitting on a desk for the news desk reporter to find in the morning, then he walked toward the door.
“Where are you going, Shaw?” Shouted Doug Hooper from a light table where he was looking at the next edition of the Sentinel.
“My People of Interest column,” Irwin said.
“I’ve already got it!”
“The next one.”
“What was on the wires?”
“Gerard Depardieu in Detroit.”
“Just go home, Shaw,” Doug said, waving at him irritably, looking down at the table, then feeling on the top of his head for the reading glasses that were no longer there.
It was 1:40 in the morning when Irwin Shaw left the offices of The Sentinel.
It was 6:51 the next morning when he finally arrived at home. At 1:46, as he was turning into his driveway, Irwin had heard on the police scanner in his car that a man had been found dead about four miles from where Irwin lived.
He arrived at the address of the death five minutes ahead of The Sentinel’s police reporter, Jim Smith. Jim was a tall, jolly guy whose writing was as bland as his name and who didn’t really care if other reporters hijacked his stories. He’d just been working the same beat for so long, it was like getting paid to hang out with his friends in blue.
The house was enormous, but other than that pretty unremarkable. It was white with black shutters, squarish, and had what appeared to be about one window for every room in its three sprawling stories. All of the windows were the same; there was no picture window visible on any of the three sides of the house that Irwin could see either from the road or from his current position in the driveway.
Irwin, flashing his press badge to no one in particular, stepped up near the front door of the house where the police and the press had already set up shop. There was a police line, and just outside of it a handful of uniformed police officers were talking in subdued tones to a young man and woman in their early- or mid-twenties. The young man looked vaguely familiar, but it was the kind of familiarity that easily could have come from living so near to one another and shopping in the same places. Irwin couldn't place him.
The police didn't seem to be talking to the young man and the young woman as much as talking to the young woman and tolerating the young man being there, his hands on the girl's shoulders obviously being integral to keeping her from falling apart. The young man looked around him, and his eyes were red. He glanced through the crowd, fixed on Irwin for a second, and then looked away. There didn’t seem to have been any indication of recognition from the young man in the second they'd made eye contact.
The officer who had been talking to the young couple turned his back and headed indoors, and the couple sat on the bottom step of the house's big, all-wooden porch.
Irwin hung his head, took a reporter's notebook out of the pocket of his gray trench coat and approached them slowly. He spoke, first, to the girl, who had obviously been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy, her hair mussed. There was blood on her shirt, which had been partially covered by the brown corduroy jacket slung over her body. The young man next to her didn't look much better.
"I'm sorry," Irwin started. "I know this is a terrible time, but can I ask you a few things?"
"Who are you?" The girl choked out.
"Irwin Shaw, with The Sentinel."
"Oh. Press."
"Yeah. We always know just where we're needed the least, and that's more or less where we're paid to be. I live right down the way, so my editor figured I might know you guys,. Your brother looks a little familiar."
The young man didn't move, didn't respond. He didn't seem to be acknowledging Irwin at all.
"He's not my brother," the girl corrected. "My fiancé. This is James. His father is...was...he's the son."
"Of the one who passed?"
"Right."
Irwin looked at the young man, whose dark hair was longish and unkempt and who appeared to have been rousted from his sleep to come to the crime scene; he was wearing sweat pants, a mesh shirt and slippers. His eyes were also red with exhaustion and tears.
"I'm sorry for your loss, James," Irwin said, but the young man didn't respond.
The girl chimed in quietly: “What do you need, Mister…hmm…I’m sorry, forgot already…?”
“That’s okay. It happens. Irwin Shaw, Sentinel. You’ve had a long night.”
“So do you know what’s happened?” She asked him.
“I heard on the police scanner that someone was found dead here.”
“Yes, James’ father.”
“You said,” Irwin led her on. “What happened?”
“He was murdered. Shot.”
“Was anyone else in the house at the time?”
“He was shot through the window.”
“Are they absolutely sure about that?”
“I don’t know if they are, but I am. I was in the next room.”
Where was James here? In bed?”
“Yeah, in bed…at home…” the girl seemed flustered. “…At his house. Sorry. I don’t usually talk to the press.”
“You’re fine,” Irwin reassured her, “You’re doing fine. What’s your name, though?” He was scratching out the first notes in his pad.
“My name? It’s Michelle Zlomek. This is my house.”
“You live here alone?”
“No. It’s my dad’s house. I live here. I’m not out of college yet.”
“Where do you go?”
“I’d rather not say.”
“Okay…”
“Don’t you want to know about who was killed?”
“I was coming around to that.”
“His name was Lowe. Edward Lowe.”
“Name sounds familiar.”
“He was the CEO of Keystone Security,” James said. His voice was so hoarse and quiet that it took Irwin a second to realize that he was being addressed.
“We did a feature on them not long ago,” Irwin said, turning to James and trying to keep from seeming put off. “They’re local.”
“Yeah,” James said.
“Was there any reason why anyone would be wanting to kill your father, James?”
“Plenty.”
“Want to tell me some of them?”
“Not really.”
“Want to tell me who? I might be able to bring them to justice….”
“I thought that was the police.”
“Them, too,” Irwin quipped, trying his hardest not to sound overly glib and failing.
“I think I’ll stick with them. They’re kind of officially doing it.”
“They’re just part of the Executive Branch. The press is the Fourth Estate.”
“I am greatly disturbed by the death of my father, which comes as a shock to our family,” James said. It sounded as though he were reading from a script. “I look forward to seeing his killer brought to justice and will support the law enforcement community in any way I can during the investigation.”
“Wow,” Irwin said.
“Is that what you needed?” James asked, ice in his tone. “A comment?”
“Did you kill your father, James?”
“Fuck off.”
“I’ll fuck off in just a minute. Just wanted you to know—if you give a press conference and make a remark that shallow, in that tone of voice, anyone who sees you on TV will think that you killed Edward Lowe.”
“Off the record?”
“That all depends.”
“I already know who killed him. I also know they’ll never be held accountable. I just don’t know what I’m going to do about it yet.”
“Tell me what you think. Maybe I can get some evidence to supply to the police.”
“Why can’t I just tell it to the police?”
“Or that.”
“You’ve got my statement, Mr. Shaw. Please just go away now.”
“Miss? I forget your name.” He looked down at his scrawled notes. “Michelle!”
“What?” She sighed.
“Why was Mr. Lowe at your house so late?”
“My father works with Ed at Keystone.”
“What’s your father’s name?”
“Zlomek.”
“His first name?”
“Just go read some press releases or something,” James hissed. “I’m sure you can put it all together.”
“Thanks for the help,” Irwin said.
He stood, much to the chagrin of his knees and ankles, and turned around. He almost walked into a uniformed police officer who was making a beeline for something important.
“Whoa! Sorry,” Irwin said. “Irwin Shaw. Sentinel. Got a minute?”
“No,” the cop said, and tried to sidestep Irwin, who followed his movement.
“How about half of one?”
The cop’s jaw tensed for a second and then relaxed. “What do you want?”
“Whose house is this?”
“No comment.”
“What relation is he to the deceased?”
“No comment.”
“I hear he worked with the victim. What’s the homeowner do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Did you know that Lowe was the CEO?”
“Yes.”
“But you don’t know what Zlomek was? Is.”
“No.”
“You guys got on this pretty quick. I don’t live far.”
“I was in the area.”
“Doing what?” Irwin wondered if there was evidence to be had, which a slow patrolman might not put together and might, therefore, accidentally expose to the press.
“Someone busted in the side of a phone booth.”
“Sounds thrilling,” Irwin said, “What’s your name?”
“Shane Norton.”
“Thanks.”
Irwin put his pad and pen back in the pocket of his coat without having written anything about a vandalized payphone.
---
Martin’s phone was ringing.
He had been sitting up in bed for over three hours, waiting for the call, but he was slow to answer. On the small coffee table in front of his television was the morning’s paper. On the front page, with a tabloid-sized headline, was a story about a CEO of a locally-owned, New York-based company having been shot to death at his partner’s house the night before.
“Edward Lowe, 53, of Brick was killed last night in Red Bank….Lowe, the CEO of Keystone Security, was shot through the window of 212 Marsh Drive….The building belongs to Eugene Zlomek, Lowe’s business partner and the CFO of Keystone.”
Martin had killed Edward Lowe. Edward Lowe, the annoying bastard who always came into work and bitched about his cheeseburger. For a moment, Martin was struck by the pettiness of a millionaire—someone who obviously could have gone to a better establishment after one or two disappointments and left Martin the hell alone—coming every single day and bitching about mayonnaise. The thought, though, was hard-pressed to remain long in Martin’s mind, given the thoughts it was fighting for attention and the ringing of the phone that Martin knew could not possibly be good news.
“Yes?” He answered, tired and anxious and not at all happy to be alive.
“Martin, how are you?” Came Alderman’s voice from the other end of the phone; his good cheer was infinitely more frightening than if he had just called and started shouting.
I’m so sorry I fucked up, Mr. Alderman,” Martin said into the phone, so fast he could hardly be understood. “Please give me another shot—chance. I’ll fix things.”
“There’s nothing to fix. I’ve got things under control on my end, I think. You’re not going to be paid for this travesty, certainly. You did, after all, screw up the job rather severely…but you had the right idea and you got away without implicating any of us.”
“Thank you, Sir. Do do I…?”
“I want him dead by Friday, and I don’t want it in the papers. I don’t want my people to hear about it until it’s too late to be helped. This is kind of against the rules.” His sinister, faux-European voice paused to assume a more professional air. “Zlomek will be named CEO on Friday if he’s still alive when the Board meets in emergency session to discuss the passing of Mr. Lowe. At that point, he’ll become very useful to us. I’d rather he didn’t; he’s a prick and I don’t want to work with him for the rest of my days.”
“And you’re sure there’s nobody listening on the other end of the phone, right? I mean, I’ll get away with this, right?”
“The only thing that could get you in trouble now, Martin—is if you keep asking that. It’s really very unprofessional. It’ll give people the wrong idea.”
“Sorry.”
“Quite alright,” Alderman said. “I’ll call you when I hear that Zlomek is dead. In the meantime, you just sit tight.”
Before Martin could say goodbye, Alderman hung up the phone. Martin sat for a second, scowling at this indignity, and then hung up the phone and silently threw himself at, more than into, his huge blue easy chair. He picked up the remote control from the seat, flicked on the television and caught the news:
“Edward Lowe, President and CEO of Keystone Security, was killed late last night at the home of the company’s CFO Eugene Zlomek. This could spell more trouble for Keystone, whose bid to take over CopCo fell through very publicly last month and whose stock has been steadily declining since rumors surfaced that the company could face charges relating to union-busting. Lowe’s family says they intend to release a statement this afternoon. Keystone, meanwhile…” and Martin switched the channel. On HBO, they were playing a documentary about Lenny Bruce, and Martin left it there while he closed his eyes and tried to decide whether to cry or just take a nap until the phone started ringing again.
---
Irwin's phone was ringing.
After having filed the late-night story on the murder of Edward Lowe, Irwin had returned home and slept. His sheets were tossed everywhere, and there was a pretty clear trail of disorder from where Irwin had entered the dark room the night before, to where he'd hopped onto bed. In that trail were all of the pieces of junk that he had stepped on before falling asleep at five in the morning. He could see it all now, with his clear eyes and the light flooding the cheap lace curtains of the bedroom.
Monumentally disoriented, Irwin faced the wall and reached out. His hand struck the wall and he turned back around and reached out again, this time grabbing at his alarm clock.
"Yallo?" he muttered into the phone when, after its fifth ring, he finally had it in his hand.
"Shaw, what the hell were you thinking?" Hooper demanded.
"Say again?"
"I said, 'What the hell were you thinking?' Last night."
"Last night, I was thinking, 'I should hand in this story to Doug, so that he'll stop bitching.' Shows you Daffy Duck was right when he said it doesn't pay to think."
"Smartass. Stop screwing around. You were hounding someone else's story."
"Oh, come off it. You know he doesn't care."
"We have to have some semblance of order here, Shaw."
"It didn't seem to bother you last night; they said they were planning on running it on the front page."
"They did."
"Great. So what are you complaining about?"
And Irwin hung up.
Of course, I didn't know any of this yet. I figured it all out later.
"Blah-blah-blah!" The TV told me. I had been, for the previous hour, watching an HBO special on Lenny Bruce. Sunk low in a star-spangled camping chair in the living room of my small apartment, I stared vacantly at the television, too exhausted to either change the channel or take in the information in any meaningful way. My phone rang, and I ignored it. Finally, the answering machine kicked in.
"I don't know how you got this number," my voice came from the machine, "but there must be a good reason for it if you did. So state that reason and maybe I'll get back to you." There was then a series of beeps long enough to irritate all but the most persistent caller.
"Mr. Abernathy, we need to talk," a voice said. I cocked my head a little bit and hit the mute key on the remote control. Lenny Bruce was silent, but the TV continued to buzz with electrical life. The caller pressed on. "I believe that someone has tried to kill me. I was fortunate in that they failed, but I'm worried they may try again. I also have...fears...about the legal ramifications for me of their failed attempt. Please return my call at 200-8870. I will pay handsomely."
I clicked the sound on the television back on and mulled over what he had said. I already knew who he was, of course--it had been all over the papers about Ed Lowe at Keystone. There are only so many people who can afford my services, so there isn't a lot of room for coincidences in these matters.
There were only four or five people who could be calling me, asking for my help in this particular circumstance: Board members fo Keystone. I knew off the bat that I could count Mrs. O'Keefe out, clearly, and probably Bill Munger, too. He was too good a guy to be in a compromising position and too hapless to realize it even if he was. Also unlikely was Vittorio Graves, who was too old to be a suspect without a really solid motive--which nobody yet knew he had. That left the CFO, Eugene Zlomek. He made sense as a suspect; unfriendly, corrupt, young and strong...and the murder had happened at his house. So of course he hadn't done it, but the police would be positive he had.
Shit. I had to do this, didn't I?
I tuned off the television and sunk lower in my chair, closed my eyes and bowed my head. Might as well get some sleep.
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dravidious · 15 days
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You're more good than less good things
My computer randomly decided to be a cryptic bastard today. There I was, browsing custom 3DS themes (I found a nice PMD one), when my computer suddenly grinds to a crawl. Everything is going super slow, so I close Firefox. Still slow. I open task manager, and nothing looks out of order. I close All The Things. Still slow. I restart my computer.
After waiting for half an hour for it to finish "Getting Windows set up for you. Don't turn off your computer." I turn off my computer and turn it on again. It STILL takes forever to start up, and it's still super slow. Checking the task manager, I see that the disk usage is consistently at a solid 100%, but the only thing using it is the system. I figure there might be some malware causing it, so I redownload AVG Antivirus and run a scan. Nothing. AVG is now also using the disk, making the problem worse, so I uninstall it. The uninstall says "Something went wrong" or something and gives me a button to restart the uninstaller. Oops, it wasn't to restart the uninstaller, it was to restart my entire fucking computer! Because apparently it didn't trust me to know how to restart it normally!
So it takes 10 minutes to shut down and then 20 minutes to turn back on (faster than last time. Progress?), and the disk usage is STILL locked at 100%, though thankfully AVG did actually properly uninstall. I have an assignment due this week and I REALLY need to have a functioning computer, so my only hope left is that this is some kind of maintenance that the computer didn't tell me about and that if I just let it work it'll eventually finish and everything will be fine.
That's exactly what happened. So apparently it was just some maintenance thing or something.
Moral of the story: FUCKING TELL THE USER WHAT THE SYSTEM IS DOING!!! COMMUNICATION IS KEY! SECRETS HARM EVERYONE! CLARITY OF INFORMATION IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD!
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student-by-day · 4 years
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16. 02. 20.
can’t find a consistent theme or lighting, but oh well.
currently listening to: “honeymoon fades” by sabrina carpenter
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