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#i should have danced for her
mayasaura · 1 year
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I think the best possible time travel fic would be to slingshot Harrow from the end of Harrow the Ninth back to the beginning of Gideon the Ninth. Highest hilarity potential, highest angst potential, highest pining potential
Things Harrow knows now that she didn't before:
Who Alecto was
The names of God and his lyctors
The secret of lyctorhood
That the lyctor trials are a death trap
Gideon could be easily persuaded to die for her
Gideon dying for her is the worst thing possible
She would do almost anything to prevent Gideon from dying
Gideon's sword is haunted by a very angry and oddly familiar-looking woman who bears a remarkable resemblance to Gideon
Things Harrow still doesn't know:
What Alecto is
Gideon's parentage
Jackshit about BOE
Mercy and Augustine are both traitors
Things Harrow knew then and still knows now:
Gideon—this Gideon here and now—hates her
She owes a debt of two hundred lives and a future to the Ninth
The survival of the Ninth depends on her becoming a lyctor
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chirpsythismorning · 11 months
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There isn't much discourse about how Mike went from saying that El was a weapon in s1, even encouraging the others to use El's powers when she was still recuperating after finding Will in the void, to then in s3 accusing the others of being reckless with her powers, saying she's risking her life for no reason.
Now, I want to make clear that I'm not bashing Mike here, this has less to do with what he's doing being right or wrong. What this is about is how Mike went from doing something himself, to calling out other people for doing it, without acknowledging that fact and why the writers chose to frame it all this way.
You might think it's insignificant, but these two following scenes are clearly being paralleled to each other. And so the fact that Mike himself is acknowledging this as something to be critical of, makes me wonder what exactly is going on in his mind...
I want to preface this scene from s1 by saying that Mike is giving very off vibes here. I know that I certainly viewed this scene as romantic the first time I saw it, but since rewatching it recently, I was getting completely different vibes.
They literally make a point to focus on Mike being distracted, on the verge of impatience. Then, the way El reacts upon Mike getting up abruptly, gives this feeling of uncertainty about Mike's consideration for her in this moment, as she's clearly not what's on the top of his mind right now. And it just makes you wonder, are we truly supposed to be feeling peak romance rn?
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I never realized how out of place this scene was until now (or is it...). It's just such an odd choice to have El resting her head on Mike's shoulder for comfort, only for Mike to cut it short with him being distracted, and with Dustin and El looking awkwardly at Mike like "Okay?...", then followed by a scene where he's trying to convince the others to use El's powers to help.
Here we have s1 Mike displaying behavior that s3 Mike was calling out the others for displaying:
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Here we have Lucas, who was very, very critical of El being dangerous ALL of s1, and yet now in complete contrast to that, he is showing more consideration and common sense for El's well being than Mike, the supposed love (at first sight) interest ...
'That's the most important thing, remember?'
A question, followed by Mike just standing there in silence, like he's only just now really thinking about El being safe as their main priority... This is something that combined with everything else unfolding over the course of this season and the seasons after, that makes Mike's behavior a whole lot easier to understand.
I'll have to make several other posts about this, because there are a lot of aspects to it, but for now I'm just going to focus on these two parallels.
Here we have what happens in s3, with Mike being critical of the others doing something he himself literally did in s1:
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In fact, how careless all of you are.
THIS. When Mike makes it a big deal to call out everyone for doing something he himself has already done, he's outright admitting that it's something that he believes is wrong, and by not even slightly acknowledging his role in doing something similar in the past, it's very likely that he feels guilty about it.
This was probably his way of trying to make it right, by standing up for El in a way that he didn't before because he was treating her like some superhero and not a real person back then.
It's just that the word love slipped out, in the heat of the moment. And El, upon overhearing this, is seeing this development of Mike herself, with s1 Mike going from, yes being more kind and considerate than the other 2 boys in the beginning, but still sort of expecting stuff from her without her being able to verbally agree to it, to now having developed and changed to saying that one of his big priorities is her safety.
El is taking this as being evidence he went from not loving her, to loving her. Another reason why it's pretty obvious El didn't believe Mike's monologue, bc she herself witnessed Mike develop his apparent romantic feelings for her over time, and so him saying it was love at first sight, was probably the catalyst that made it abundantly clear to her that he wasn't being truthful, bc she knows it's not the truth. She's not stupid.
Again this isn't about Mike doing this back then or even the others doing it now as being bad vs. good, this is about the writers going about it this way, sending a message that Mike feels guilt, enough to try to make things right, but is apparently not ready to unpack the actual guilt that is beneath the surface which lead him to this point.
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And then there's this scene, which... it's actually terrifying how obvious it is they instructed Sadie and Caleb to lean out of that shot with Will and Mike reacting to El entering the room... Like... It's SOO obvious when you watch it now what they're trying to hint at without saying it.
Not only are they hinting at Will's feelings, because that is part of it, they're also hinting at Mike's internal struggle. Will is always on the back of his mind whether he's willing to address it or not. And all while that is happening, he is feeling unaddressed guilt about how he treated El when they first met and spent that one week together helping her run away from the bad guys while also looking for Will, something Mike viewed as being worthy of El using her powers...
I'll have to make the other posts regarding this soon, because it all starts to click what's going on with Mike when you look at all of these things together.
While Mike is just a kid like pretty much everyone else in this story, and while he didn't mean any harm by asking El to help them find Will (none of them did), I think that's kind of the whole point?
I think that he got lucky superman landed on his doorstep, who just so happened to be in danger herself, giving him his own purpose to help her too, with her needing him as well, and so it became a situation where they both needed each other.
But because El could literally not speak, it's not like she could really voice her feelings about things they were doing, beyond yes and no. She had Lucas sort of being critical of her, with Mike encouraging El to do things that would make the others see her as being worthy of sticking around so they can find Will. It goes without saying she felt obligated to do these things, even if they didn't outright tell her she had to or else. We literally see almost all of these scenes with her doing stuff for the others being instantly juxtaposed with scenes of Brenner doing the same. It's not the same scale of severity, but it is an acknowledgment that although she is outside of the lab, she still feels like her powers are what define her and it's all people want from her.
I think what it comes down to, is that in that moment when she is sacrificing herself to the demogorgan at the end of s1, we are seeing in real time Mike realizing what he and the other's have been asking of her this whole time, without outright asking her.
And you can literally see the retaliation and devastation hit him all at once. The instant regret, where he's backtracking and El stops him from even trying.
'Goodbye Mike' singles him out, because while he was the one out of the three that showed her the most kindness from the start, he was also the one who at the end of it all, was still expecting her to risk her life for them...
And that just makes it hit so much harder when you think about how that made Mike feel in that moment.
And then in s2 how that impacts Mike and his journey going forward.
His breakdown at the end of s2 upon her return.
His behavior in s3-4, in relation to him juggling his relationship with Will and El, now that they are both in his life at the same time.
It all starts to make sense.
I won't go too much into it because those other posts are bound to be long with a bunch of pictures too!
But on that note, there's at least one thing Mike isn't acknowledging, and it's literally what led up to the unintentional love confession that then led us to 10 more episodes of miscommunication because of it...
It's going to be important for him to address this guilt for him to fulfill his arc and to also close off his expectations that he has to have a romantic relationship with El in order to keep her in his life at all.
The audience themselves seeing this and being forced to face it is also going to make it a lot easier for them understand why Mike did what he did, not only because he's a queer kid in the 80's who has every reason to doubt and repress, but also because he understandably feels sort of indebted to El after everything.
It's more complex than him just falling out of love with her and falling in love with Will because of XYZ.
I think there is a lot of guilt and shame and trauma connected to their meeting and the events that followed. And addressing that is going to give a lot of closure to the ending of the story and also the beginning.
#byler#stranger things#mike wheeler#i feel like mikes arc always comes off as convoluted to most viewers bc they’re missing the whole picture#like this is literally canon#Mike went from doing something to saying other people doing it was wrong without acknowledging his role in that from the beginning#and so ppl using that development as aww he loves her now…#doesn’t even work when apparently he loved her since the moment he saw her…#not being willing to pay attention to how they are building up mikes arc#dancing around all of his actions with#everyone makes mistakes bc they’re children and that’s okay#and just leave it at that…#bc yes obviously all of the characters should be able to make mistakes and be forgiven#but were ignoring the elephant in the room here#it’s canon Mike feels guilt for how he treated el in s1 yet he hasn’t acknowledged it…#instead of acknowledging his history of doing something similar#he’s pointed out everyone else doing it as if they’re doing something wrong he himself would never do…#as if he doesn’t have first hand experience#they could have actually made this moment romantic and genuine IF they wanted to#they could have had mike open up about how he used to do that#but after getting to know el and realize she is her own person#it made him think differently and he wants to do better by her#then maybe when she confronted him in front of everyone he could have said it again or asked to be alone to say it to her directly#and to apologize for how he acted in the past by expecting stuff of her#and THATS why he is extra cautious now#and then got her reaction#instead they give fans the impression Mike is the ideal male love interest#who is perfect for el#with this moment being one of their top reasons#and it’s a scene where he avoids confronting series long built up guilt…
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crystallizsch · 1 month
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who is your favorite fearless hero?
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(not yuusha she is a girlfailure)
sigh boob window 😮‍💨 anyways- MASQUERADE OUTFIT FOR YUUSHA
still not 100% sure about the colors and the overall design but i’m pretty content with it right now
(i also need to give her more clothes she can’t always be wearing that ugly ah hand-me-down school uniform)
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WHO IS NEXT TO OCHAKO?
WHERE THE HELL IS TOGA??
IS THAT ACTUALLY OCHAKO???
IS THAT ACTUALLY TSUYU????
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figs-oyster · 1 year
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When Emily Axford said “I feel like the dreams [especially for young girls] get thinner as you go through puberty” I felt that. Dear god I felt that.
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fischiee · 4 months
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thinking abt how carolina was in her early 20's in pfl makes me go so crazy every time. she should've been at the club
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ace-cf-cups · 1 month
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Friendly reminder that up until 4B/S5 (so, until writers began to mess her up), Belle has never had problems with Rumple's magic, in Enchanted Forest or Storybrooke. She even liked it.
In fact, her only issue with Rumple in earlier seasons wasn't his use of magic but his reluctance to be completely honest with her / share things with her.
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possamble · 7 days
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realizing im kind of a weirdo about laios and marcille
#possramble#ignore this im just babbling but#the thing is that like. i don't ship laios and marcille together. their relationship is so so important to me in that laios comphets himsel#and THINKS that he might be in love with her but he isn't and that's my insane obsession#platonic soulmates for real but they're so sweet together that i fully expect them to be shipped together#like i get it. that's almost the appeal for me. if dungeon meshi were any other series there'd be an epilogue where they get married#convention dictates that they're meant to be together as the male protagonist and his beloved female deuteragonist#but dungeon meshi DOESNT do that and i love it so fucking much they're the comphet besties ever for my strange little brain#like if i ever did an arranged marriage au it would absolutely be laios and marcille having a platonic political marriage and then just#the most insane mutual pining with marcille and falin while laios and marcille struggle their way into becoming best friends#the imagery of the king and his beautiful court mage being tender to each other and everyone thinking they're in love is like catnip to me#like yeah they'd be like that and have no idea people think they should be together and the subversion makes me so obsessed#the more people ship them romantically. the more i enjoy their platonic dynamic it's like some sort of weird comphet fetishism idk#people think they're in love and im outside the window like YES... YES!!!#but also the second i see stuff of them kissing on the mouth or fucking im like oh god no i went too deep in here i gotta get out#don't wanna see that. i'll go feral over the idea of laios and marcille being arm-in-arm like king and queen but they would not fuck.#i want marcille to be his default comphet beard and dance partner/plus one at official royal events but they're not kissing.#she's there on his arm because he's scared of the other noble women tryna get him and being a baby about it#and people see them muttering to each other and laughing and generally being very sweet and think that they're dating but they're not.#she's actually covered in hickies from falin underneath her dress and is gonna get dragon dicked right after the party is over#like she's in her bedroom and falin's helping her take her ridiculous dress off while listening to her complain about politics#and falin is the person she goes home to the person she falls asleep to and wakes up with#they're a triad of utter devotion to each other but only farcille's side of the triangle is romantic#it's almost like an open secret because they're not trying to hide it at all but people assume and are surprised to find out#like people are so right about her relationship with the toudens but with the siblings' roles switched#love of her life & irreplaceable life companion. does anyone get it#anyway. i don't know what's wrong with me#it bothers me that they're not the undisputed most popular het ship for marcille on ao3#it's unnatural. marcille being paired with any other man should be a fringe case.
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daily-hanamura · 7 months
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#persona 4#p4#persona 4 golden#p4g#yosuke hanamura#hanamura yosuke#but he certainly does it with a lot of consistency and i love that so much#yosuke's not the first person to always include nanako#it makes me extremely soft because i feel like yosuke tries to be inclusive with his friends he doesnt want anyone to feel left out#we see it especially in his interactions with the first years and teddie#on some level he knows that the others are less willing to put themselves out there#thinking about the beach outing where kanji says that he would not have gone yo the beach if it wasnt for yosuke's invitation#anyway in this particular instance I'm just very very weak for yosuke looking out for nanako as well#i mean nanako is super cute (and i say that as someone who doesnt really like kids or kid characters) and everyone loves her (as they should#so in a way yosuke keeping her included is not surprising#but on some level its also just... yosuke being considerate of yu#i mean look at yu's title of siscon kingpin of steel in arena - yu cares very much for nanako#so by extension yosuke does as well#also on a more delulu lvl in p4d rise says she'll give nanako priv dance lessons#because it'll just be her yu and nanako and WOW isnt that just like... (giggles) - rises hilarious transparency aside#isnt that exactly what yosuke has with yu and nanako?#ngl im lowkey thinking about romcom single parent troupes and yosuke is just ticking all the boxes#ok ok im jking (im not)#he's good with his queue
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ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE! It’s messy but. Ehh. I was just having a fun time.
EEEEEEvery so often Gaster gets a surge of confidence for this sort of thing. What’s he saying to her? Something lovey-dovey, obviously! You decide~
Here’s a couple alternate versions: no glasses, and one from before I remembered Gaster’s scar + Asteri’s wings:
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ennaih · 4 months
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Not Every Film I Watch In 2024
5. Eileen (2023)
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mayasaura · 5 months
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do you think that Harrow would choose Alecto over Gideon?
I think that depends on how you mean it. Like if they were both dangling from a cliff and she could only save one of them? No fucking clue, and I hope to hell she never has to find out.
If she's choosing who to ask to prom, that's much easier. No. Gideon gets the corsage.
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goldkirk · 3 months
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as I'm going back over my past history and items and journals and years, I come across all sorts of things, like the pencil I saved from that so-precious memory from second grade, and a pair of flip flops I've been missing for two years, and (tw for murder/crime/killings) the modern-high-school-AU-kidnapped-by-a-serial-killer story I wrote in late high school jdfsjdfsjkjlksfd
#i can't wait to find out what red flags I didn't see in my own self back when I last read this thing in 2015 hfdhfdhjsfd#also. there's gonna be like a good sentence here and there and then CRINGE. the whole rest of everything is just me still trying to copy th#breathing pace (essentially) and ways-of-describing-things of mainstream authors like I thought I was supposed to#so this'll be somewhat painful but also god what a joy and a gift and an honor and a delight to get to hold this close to my heart#and witness it with understanding and empathy and slow reflection and care like my past younger self deserves#i'm so lucky i'm alive to be here and do this#i'm so grateful i'm headed towards welcoming back and embracing the last little girl i was that still felt a lot of things#so excited for her focus and precision and tenacity and constant curious joy and movement to be back someday#i'm afraid people won't like the me i was before rule after rule and then dangers#but my god it'll feel so good to be the fully-flowing energy machine and dance and conduit again how will I have enough bother to care?#people who are good to each others' nervous systems cumulatively feel better and better#if i'm not good for you and yours then you really truly SHOULD go elsewhere and find someone who makes YOUR self feel right and light + war#anyway now that i wrote an essay in the tags as usual [nervous laughter]#personal#add to journal#words n rhythm#WHY DID I FEEL CAPABLE OF UNDERTAKING A STORY LIKE THIS#cradling my past self gently but also BANGING my HEAD against the WALL lmao#i'm proud of myself for writing and sharing this and its creative ideas. even if i don't like it now or feel ashamed or see mistakes.#anything. it mattered that it came to me and it mattered that i explored it and it mattered that i poured myself through it to help shape i#and it mattered that I left it on the internet so that now it still exists. i'm going to honor this story no matter what current me would#objectively think about it if it was written by anyone else.#this is a gift i give myself now.#this is a lot of what I learn and learn to do#trauma evolution#mosswrites
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tj-crochets · 1 month
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Hey y'all! I am in the mood for some new (to me) music. Do you have any recommendations for songs that make you want to dance? No limits on genre or language, but if you're sending me a link to a specific music video please give me a heads up if it has flashing lights (if possible). Thanks!
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I’m a demon, I lie.
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sieglinde-freud · 7 months
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every time this banner rolls around i remember how this is the single greatest thing intsys has ever done for me
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