#i will l word you forever

[hitmeupaep]

destiel angst but imagine a world where when cas tells dean there real dean replies screaming and sobbing “really cas? an angel of the lord sent down here to put gods chess pieces into place? how do i know your not just another false hope your dad made to destroy me?”

#this is essently just if supernatural did what lucifer season 5 did if i’m being honest #im bad at wording it but if you know what i’m talking about i hope you get it l #like dean being so scared of everything being a lie he lashes out on cas #every story needs there tragic love and god does this feel exactly like that #of course chuck would dangle this in front of deans face give him the perfect man #just watch dean fawn over him forever unable to have him #destiel #supernatural #castiel #dean winchester #destiel angst #fic ideas #spn fic ideas

[grasslandgirl]

enough about the tragedy of loss of friendship. let’s talk about the beauty of the same thing instead. there’s something so unspeakably beautiful to me about the fact that friendship doesn’t ever end if you don’t let it. you meet someone and let them into your life and then they’re a part of you. a part of your world and your life and there’s no end to it. if you put in the world and the care and the communication to take care of it, the lifespan of your friendships is. forever. you get to have those people in your life for as long as you live; and you get to take care of them and they take care of you. and isn’t that beautiful? in a world full of things with limits, friendship and love doesn’t. it just doesn’t. it goes on forever. even after you’re gone and your friends are gone it lives in on in the lives you touched together and the little worlds you built together. that’s beautiful. 

#brought to you by my undending love and gratitude for my friends <3 #and more specifically the conversation jamie and i were having about this specific thing. wow i am full of love. it is overflowing. #words #i just !!!! #there is something so lovely about turning to someone and going 'i want to have you in my life forever. for as long as you'll l #let me be here.' yk? think about that. say that to the people you love.

[deus-ex-mona]

man. this song reminds me of physiology class

#throwback to physiology class [x] years ago when this clique sitting behind me drank a sip of water every time #our lecturer said the word ‘infarction’ #they kept tricking her into saying the word which was pretty funny at the time #but that’s just what this song reminds me of with the frequency at which they say the phrase ‘white day kiss’ #of all of the new album songs to get stuck in my head… it’s this and abs. #can’t stop thinking about meoto but white day kiss is looping in my mind aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #i. i think i need some sleep. but my album’s supposed to arrive within the next 2 hours and aufhhfjfjjfjrjdjdjdjdhs #5-7pm delivery is too cruel of a delivery slot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #g god i really shouldn’t have stayed up for meoto… maybe i’d have a little more sanity then… #i keep going back to my tl to look for typos and im just. wondering if this song is really real. #like. dammit. promises to stay by each other’s sides forever???? even through reincarnation too??? #wh. what are the chances that we’ll get a meoto mv this week? (pls say more than 0) #i think we could all windows movie maker a 1-2 image white day kiss mv from the honeypre event illusts if we tried hard enough sooooooo #i sure hope that if any new song gets an mv this week it’ll be meoto!!!!!!! #pls lemme see them being in love all through the seasons ill c r y #ok i’ll shut up for now see you within 2 hours (maybe) when d to the h to the l finally gives me my album

[performapals]

the world if the widely accepted ship name was egaoshipping instead of counterpartshipping 🌆

#koi.txt #THIS IS NOT A F*LLENANG*L POST . THIS IS FULLY ABT COUNTERPART. i hate that egaoship is another word for f*llenang*l #die forever. sorry im a hater forever #im bpdboy and etc etc. you understand

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some recent pressed leaves and stuff to add to the collection :0

#LOV giant nasturtium leaves #and they press weirdly thin like when they dry out it's almost like a super super fragile sheet of tracing paper or something #I also just really enjoy collecting textures and patterns and stuff. like it's not really about them looking pretty but more just #something notable. like the cool dotted pattern or the stripey veiny looking one #I have so much I want to get done by the end of the year but have been so unproductive still lol ToT #I've had new costumes and like Actual Stuff To Post for probably 2 months now but they just sit in a folder and I forget about #them and like walk in circles talking to myself all day instead or something hhh #I think it's the classic cycle of like 'I am too stressed to be productive > the fact that i'm not being productive stresses me out > i am #even more stressed and no more productive > being unproductive stresses me out > so on and so forth forever' lol #or the 'I have so many goals in life and so much motivation and so many things I love and want to do > there are too many things to do #at once and it's overwhelming > do none of them instead' cycle lol #I think my main focuses in the new year though are to finally finish the worldbuilding slideshow. Do more costumes. And do more sculptures #since I haven't done a lot of those in a while. And still work on my games and short stories and stuff that takes place in my worldbuilding #world but those are more difficult longterm tasks so I think they should be like. not the MAIN main focus or else I'll never feel like I do #anything. I think that was the problem for the past while is that the things I had delegated as my Main Focuses That Go Above All Else #are so long and difficult and tedious that you never feel like you're making progress so it's like you're ignoring all the other stuff you #could be doing in favor of a thing that feels like you're not doing anything thus you get a chronic feeling of never finishing anything ever #Whereas like. I can do a sculpture in a day or two. and I can do costumes in a day or less. Having a steadier flow of Small Things i can fee #l like I'm actually accomplishing will maybe help it not just be like 'okay I spent a whole day doing somehting and have nothing tangible to #show for it because it's just text in a word document that probably nothing will ever even come of because it will take me years to finish' #The biggest insurmountable task at the moment is the worldbuilding slideshow but I am chugging through.. slowly lol.. It takes me about #2 hours to read 25 slides (they're not bullet points it's like little paragraphs on each slide). and I have about 800 to go. so thats.. #naur.. i shant even calculate it... plus editing one hour of vidoe usually takes about 2 hours so you double it. if I have that much recordi #ng of me reading slides to edit. then turning them all into a final video should take.... i cannot say. i shall not think of it #And I've just had a very stressful few weeks HOWEVER I just always like tp start the new year with stuff cleared like.. all of my messages I #haven't answered in 3+ weeks responded to. all of my emails to my doctors checked. house cleaned and organized. photos cleared and organized #off of the computer. everyting backed up in some sort of physical storage. clear out drafts. rewrite all of my main todo lists. decide prio #rities and yearly/monthly/weekly goals. consider the trajectory of my life and what I need to do. etc. etc. So I feel like I don't have any #time to waste and can't rest. yet.. alas.. It doesn't help that I feel sick out of nowehre like 50% of the time #I know some poeple can work/focus on tasks with body aches and etc. but my brain is just always like 'No. :)' .. grrrbb

[quicktimeeventfull]

I'm asking more because I love your headcanons so much (if you're still doing these!) 26, 31, 37, and 38!

thank you!!! sorry this took me a while -- trying to find uninterrupted time to write was a comedy of errors dfjsf but they were really fun to think about and write.

26. how do they comfort one another hands down the easiest way to make light feel better is to workshop solutions to his problems with him. this sounds good. it is not good. when light is upset, his solutions range from ‘that seems likely to cause future complications’ to ‘you will go to prison forever & you will deserve it.’ so L doesn’t do that anymore. usually he removes light from the situation and walks around with him for a bit. movement is good for light — he tends to get full of Bad physical energy without realizing it, and this helps shake some of it away. there have been lots of nights walking around and around the alleys behind their apartment.

99% of the time L doesn’t really want direct comfort. it stresses him out more than it helps because he starts overthinking how he’s supposed to show the other person that he has been Definitively Comforted. (he’s going to get a good grade in being comforted, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve.) instead light usually just sits quietly with him and pretends he just happened to want to be in that exact space in that exact time. comforts him in the same way a cat would. light is very good at this. many people in his life consider his complete lack of interest in doing anything whatsoever when someone is clearly upset to be a flaw, but it is in fact something L both wants and needs form a partner. 31. what’s the relationship like? smooth? rocky? 

i always see their relationship starting off as a complete mess. they’re compatible on the big-picture issues but constantly at odds when it comes to smaller things — who does the dishes, when does the alarm get set in the morning. all the things that keep people together from year to year are in place, but they’re a little short on the ones that bring them from day to day. they have this idea that their relationship is in some way special and they don’t have to put in the work that other people do, but it’s a classic case of two people who adore each other but let each other down in a million unimportant ways that begin to scale.

but they do eventually figure it out. i like to think of matsuda or sayu pointing out what’s going on, persistently enough that they start to take them seriously. and i think as the year go on and on they learn how to actually take care of one another in the little ways. they’ve always been willing to kill for one another and by the end they’re also willing to like, put a coaster down so the teacups don’t leave rings on the nice new table.

37. what do they like least about each other? (i love this question so much dfgjkd)

L about light: so i think light can be really, really mean. L isn’t fond of this in general, but he can deal with it when light directs it towards him. what the does find incredibly unpleasant is when light directs it towards people who have nothing to do with them and who really do not deserve it. getting snippy with him is one thing, but he finds it incredibly unpleasant when light snaps at some poor barista who’s just trying to do her job. (which like. i think light is generally pretty sweet to strangers, but he Does Not Take Well to being corrected or made to feel stupid, even if this clearly wasn’t the other person’s intention.) i think he can look at this with compassion and recognize that light basically just has terrible emotional regulation, but it’s still one of his worst flaws.

light about L: 

i think L is bizarrely non-confrontational about certain things. he expresses his desires quite strongly so he often comes across as very stubborn, but he’ll often fold when someone pushes back against them. not all the time, but fairly often. more so if he’s tired or generally having a bad day. it takes light a few months to notice they’re literally always ending up at the restaurants or movies that light wanted. also, sometimes people treat L like he’s stupid or an inconvenience because of what are clearly autistic traits — ie, not looking in the ‘right’ direction or responding as quickly as they’d like — and L will just let them do it. this isn’t necessarily something light considers a flaw, but he does not like it at all. he finds it both concerning and frustrating. it freaks him out to see L being anything other than 100% invulnerable. 

(99% of the time light is genuinely being mean for no reason but every now and again he's actually snapping at someone who was being weird and condescending towards L. it takes L literally years to notice this, somehow. best three detectives in the world but his oh-my-god-my-partner-is-being-mean-in-public mortification response is so strong that it short circuits his brain.)

38. what was their most memorable date?

probably the one time they went for a hike and L promised light that the plants he kept pointing out were absolutely 100% not poison ivy and light-kun was being ridiculous and he’d walked through this exact patch a million times before and yes he was sure, he would remember if he broke out in a horrible rash after touching them. it turned out that a very small number of people are, in fact, not allergic to poison ivy. they did see some really cool birds, though.  

#thank you for asking this was very fun #i think L's biggest everyday flaw is Severe Passive Aggression but i think light would actually be more upset by the sense that L could #be like. weak in any way whatsoever. he wants him to be perfect and unbreakable forever #i always see L as kind of wanting to please everyone around him but coming off as if he doesn't care at all #just based on things like how he's always got food ready for everyone & coffee available even if he's personally drinking tea #i think being quite sharp and authoritative is a skillset he has & is very good at but not necessarily something he actually likes doing #im never quite sure how to put that into words dfgj but i hope it makes sense #.txt

[puthyflapps]

The way the writers don’t know what the fuck they’re doing with Shane’s character kills me. I don’t understand this whole plot line where we’re tryna figure out whether or not Shane can ever grow up, settle down, and move on from her past ways when it was shown in the very first season of gen q that she has. She got married for fucks sake and the relationship didn’t dissolve because of infidelity. So why are we going through all this in season 3??? Can we not find anything else for her to do???

Not to be a hater but my thot process is at this point we know Shane is fully capable of making the ultimate commitment and if she’s cheating on you as we speak, babes she just doesn’t wanna be with you. Move on and stop acting stupid. Let the shess ship sink plssss it was barely sailing in the first place. It’s so forced at this point. Shane had more chemistry with Ivy and they had a more civil break up than any other couple on this show and they weren’t even dating plssss 😭😭😭💀💀💀

#also sidebar Max and his I guess husband are a little judgy for my taste #they were all up in maribels business and then after not seeing Shane for over a decade Max wanted to be all up in Shane’s business too like #why’d he ask the question that way??? why not just say are you seeing anyone these days like it’s been forever you don’t know her like that #anymore and your first instinct is to lowkey be rude to her #the l word #the l word gen q #anti shess #also bringing max back before Carmen 😐 marja I hate you

[grimalkinmessor]

The line between Shigadeku and Bakudeku is veeeery fucking thin and that is something you only realize once you start writing Tomura's dialogue :')

#its the curse words #shigadeku #bakudeku #bnha #boku no hero academia #istg there is a pipeline between bkdk and sgdk #ITS NOT JUST ME DAMMIT #if you see me keeping baku single in all my fics its bc i dont ship him w/ anyone else lmao #pine bitch #PINE FOREVER #meanwhile im smacking shigs and midoriya together like barbie dolls #panicking every time i make shigs swear bc he and bakugou are sO FUCKING SIMILAR ISTF #THE P A R A L L E L S #i could make a whole post about it but also im lazy #i might after i file away some things

[trashbaget]

.

#teehee guess what time it is #it's rae wants to simp time woo! #he's just some guy #but he makes me laugh so much i can feel my smiley muscles being absorbed by my eye sockets #when he gets on tangents about things he's passionate about it gives me such a warm feeling #i could talk to him forever i swear it. we just eat away the hours with our words and i can't imagine a minute spent with him NOT saying.. #everything that pops into our heads (except for the part about feelings & my liking him & his possible mutual liking but were not talkin abo #anyway i really fucking like him and it's stupid how much i do and how much he makes me happy #and the STUPIDEST part is the way my silly little mind thinks of him as 'my boyfriend' even though we're not together?? #actually no that is the second stupidest thing because the ACTUAL STUPIDEST thing is how RIGHT it feels to think of him as my boyfriend #also yall the cliche little finger brushes happened so many times today and it drove me insane #i am telling you there werent just little sparks and it didnt just feel right but i EXPECTED HIS HAND TO KEEP MOVING AROUND MINE that is how #goddamn fucking right it felt #god i feel so silly about this but i really really do like him #and he just makes me really happy and i want to be around him all the time and i want to take an impulsive trip to chicago and kiss him unde #the bean and i want to walk around a park holding his hand and talking about everythign and i want to lay on his couch with my head in his l #lap and i want to watch his favorite movies and my favorite movies and watch tv shows we've both never seen and laugh at kurtis conner video #s with him and befriend his cats and get them to adopt me and i want to buy him dinner and him to buy me dinner and to go to museums with hi #him and watch him get excited about the history of it all and i want to go to go to new cities with him and him to watch me marvel about how #different the world is from what i know having only ever been in this dumb little state my whole life and i want to go see movies with him #even and especially if they're bad because i want to crack jokes with him under our breaths and giggle so much we get kicked out of the thea #and i want to go shopping with him and clean the house with him and cook dinner with him and go on long drives with him and kiss him and hol #hold his hand and cuddle him and pet cats with him and be with him and call him my boyfriend and live laugh love with him and tell him i lov

[flabbergasties]

you know things.... hmmmm..... tell me about kate scott turner?

Kate Scott Turner, known for:

Kissing Sue while they were away at school, BIRTHING one of the best queers of all time (thank you, Kate)

Visiting Sue in Amherst and QUICKLY latching onto Emily instead

Becoming the OBJECT OF EMILY'S VERY VERY GAY OBSESSION for no small period of time

Taking a photo with Emily (allegedly), which is the only (disputed) photo of Emily in adulthood

Receiving knitted lingerie from Emily coupled with a note that says (and I'm paraphrasing) (but not by much): Wear these and I'll always be touching you 💀

Gallivanting off to Europe and POTENTIALLY sending Emily into such extreme heartbreak that she writes the Master Letters*

Very obviously still being in love with Sue, whom she writes to later in their lives to say basically that

I believe that before people pieced together Emily and Sue, they pieced together Emily and Kate, so Kate was not only Sue's gay awakening but also...like...America's awakening to gay Emily...

Which is all to say that Kate's a fucking a queer LEGEND storming into these people's lives, deeply fucking them up, and then leaving without a SINGLE GLANCE BACK, and I do very much enjoy her for the drama that she has given us.

Like I'm not going to compare anyone to Jenny because no one deserves to be compared to Jenny, but...

*This is just one alleged Master theory, and I'm not sure I buy it.

#jk kate isn't a jenny kate is a shane #but this description gives her enough of a jenny energy for me to have cracked that joke #using l word characters to describe historical figures from the 19th c might be my peak wow #you're welcome #there's more to say but i have covid and my brain is fried so this is all you're getting about kate scott turner APOLOGIES #i say apologies like i haven't made you wait for forever for this response lol there's so much to apologize for EVERYONE DON'T HATE ME #asks

[arklay]

sits on the floor. thinks about how at that point they would've known each other for around a year, but the first four months of that were just running into each other every now and again, but like they are getting to the point (or already are honestly) where their things are at each other's places. like toothbrushes and stuff. their... guys. guys!! just admit you have feelings!!!

#like they don't put a label on it or really even talk about it until they say the l word lmao and then a couple months later he asks her to #marry him because they are clowns. fools. buffoons if you will. but like there is so much lore in my brain there is SO much like you don't #understand. their situation before events of 1 is just so arhghghghgh there's so much i could talk about them forever!!! diana my absolute #beloved!!! and i guess her husband is alright... but diana!!!!!! #leah.txt

[ace-with--a-mace]

i think ive been in a constant state of melancholy

#or im losing my mind #idk i was 'normal' for like 3 weeks i was functioning making shit doing work girlbossing if you will #and i was driving yesterday and i keep breaking cuz i see people everywhere just crossing the street and shit without a care #and my mom lept getting mad at me cuz allegedly there was nobody there #so im like hm. even tho its fl ppl in my area have sense so i know what im seeing isnt real so its whtvr ill manage #and then im driving but i cant focus cuz my head is yelling st me to swerve and drive through buildings or swerve off the road cuz #“if u dont now then something much worse will hit you later and itll be fatal” so i went home. and now i just have a pit of dread or sadness #or nostalgia or whtvr #the pit is unrelated to the thoughts and shit. i think its always been there and im jusg aware of it #like yknow how ur always breathing but it becomes manual when ur aware? ya. but it hurts #my throat feels like its closing up my chest and stomach is heavy im crying somethn js happening idk what #it could b nostalgia cuz im thinking ab my friends j dont talk to anymore. could be dread ab my future cuz j lowk donr have a plan #could b melancholy (a word ive been looking for for forever and just remembered) could be some type of panic/anxiety attack #idk. idk idk idk #l speaks #shut up l #ranting in the tags because i can #but its 2 am i gotta b up at 9 for mass so hopefully i can sleep off whatever this js #i am going to pretend its nothint serious because i like to drive i love driving and i am normal and i cant afford shit going wrong now.

[linktube]

periods this pregnancy that damn this dude gotta lot to say about "the inherent" beauty of a reproductive system

#do you believe this over gloryfication and almost mystification is the right way to go around your discomfort about these topics linkypoo? #or trying to ''trap'' (his own words) others into it? #i dont belive thats really doing much for ya #but what do i know im not the joke police #rhett is and he just sentenced you to the prison of becoming the joke .p #maybe one day he'll find a better angle to conjure up jokes and bits about stuff that clearly was a source of alien discomfort for him #in the past(well) without re-embodying that easily clockable nervous energy <3 #or he can just become really repetitive poke rhett yell genital warts make a dumb face eat shit and smile forever maybe that works for him #you gotta perform some way i guess #''are ya still enjoying performing a caricature version of yourself son?'' #i hate link for making me listen to rhetts annoying yelling voice and stale sarcastic tone while having to relate to it. the anguish :/ #and i l love him as well or whatever rhett said ugh gross

[targaryenluvs]

OH BABY!

pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader, young!naive!tribute reader

summary: finnick found you to be as cute as ever. but you aren’t exactly the smartest in the room according to him. luckily, finnicks more than happy to help his sweet baby succeed, and he will not let you forget him.

warnings: AGE GAP (18 - 23) smut, FILTH THIS MAN IS DOWNBAD, possessive, corruption, pervy finnick, violent thoughts/intrusive, exhibitionist? degradation, oral (m & f), p in v, overstimulation, praise, mirror kink? spanking 👀 rough sex? tummy bulge, my first time writing smut be kind 😭

word count: 5k - this is literally the longest fic ive written.

a/n: this is what happens at 6am and i can’t sleep, thoughts are thunk - massive thank you to @motelofmermaids and @lust4lore for their help with reading and writing!!!

taglist: @coolchick333 @doublesideeye

“and the female tribute for district four, y/n l/n.” your eye involuntarily twitched at your name being called. the people around you, distanced themselves from you as a path was carved to your own hell.

as you walked to the platform you kept your head down. you were actually hopeful that you’d get through this reaping, your last and then never see the inside of the arena. but of course fate was against you. as you stood in front of the people you couldn’t help the silent tears that fled down your face.

your mothers face was tired and drained, she had a feeling you’d get picked. mothers intuition? your father was pissed, his little girl, his sweetheart, being thrown into an arena to die? and worst of all, there wasn’t anything he could do.

you felt alone, as if no one could help you. and as you said goodbye to the life you knew, you could only pray for safety, and a quick death.

as you were escorted to the train you fiddled with your sweater sleeves. pulling them down, rolling them up, just to focus your mind on something. it was chilly, most likely the air conditioning on the train and sometimes you had to hold down your skirt.

finnick couldn’t take his eyes of you once he saw you on the train. you looked so tiny in the chair and he couldn’t help but smile.

he practically had you all to himself.

“y/n?” your head shot up at your name being called and you were met with finnick odair in all his glory. “finnick? finnick odair?” even calling his name you sounded so unsure, so he smiled and nodded.

“i’m your mentor, and i promise to try my best to get you to win.” he sat down in front of you, spreading his legs and you felt your face warm up. he found you adorable, with a cute white sweater and a short black skirt. you had your hair down with the front parts tied up with a bow. his own personal present.

your shy demeanour reminded him of your young age, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. you were looking everywhere but at him and he loved it.

“do… do you think i can win?” god no. the tributes would eat you up alive, but he’d try his best. “i do.” with just two words of encouragement, you smiled at him for the first time.

finnick wanted you to smile at him forever.

“are you hungry?” the rumbling of your stomach answered his question, as you ducked your head in your hands in embarrassment.

he moved your hands aside, tilting your chin up, "it's okay to be hungry sweetheart, come on." he held his hand out for you and he laughed at your hesitance. "i don't bite, not unless you want me to.” the last part of his sentence came out hushed and you averted your eyesight from him.

there were so many foods laid out before you, and it wasn’t as if you were poor, but god, it all looked nice. the eclairs took your attention away as you reached for one, your finger sweeping cream off the top before placing it in your mouth. it was sickeningly sugary but you had a sweet tooth, you retracted your finger with a pop! and you somehow didn’t hear finnicks groan.

how on earth were you not realising how dirty it seemed? and it was there finnick realised how pure you were, “its so good,” you flashed him a toothy grin, “you'll have some won't you finnick?" you offered it up to him with two hands and how could he resist? the two of you spent the rest of your time on the train eating and talking, finnick utilising his time to get to know you.

you’d spent a day getting settled and were now to get ready for your interview.

after being prepped and readied, you were shuffled into your dressing room where analise, damian and sarah awaited. a range of compliments were thrown your way.

“oh isn’t she adorable?”

“i could pinch her cheeks forever!”

“you are precious!”

they were so nice to you and you loved it, but you barely ever learned how to take compliments so you ended up just nodding your head. “she is gorgeous,” you snapped your head up to the doorway and there stood your mentor, in all his glory. his compliment felt heavier than the rest, like he truly meant it, and you looked down at your hands as you fought off the blush threatening to rise on your cheeks.

in an hour you’d been through a whirlwind of makeup, dresses and jewels. orange, blue, black and all, you loved each one but for some reason after the four of them discussed you’d always be taken out of it.

it wasn’t until you were placed in an off the shoulder, floor length, white dress that you remained in it. and as you looked in the mirror you couldn’t help but stare. your hair was pinned up again, and small flowers were placed throughout. you felt like a princess and finnick agreed. you hadn’t even noticed that your stylists were gone until you heard the door shut.

it was just you and finnick.

“you look incredible.” finnick whispered, he was behind you now. his hand had a mind of its own as it placed a stray hair behind your ear. you turned your head his way, “really?” your voice was so soft and doused in disbelief. if he wasn’t next to you he wouldn’t have heard you. his hand trailed along your neck as he placed your hair behind, he nodded. “i have something for you.”

he pulled out a small seashell, and your eyes lit up, “oh finnick.” you sighed as he placed it in your hands. “it reminded me of you, small, gorgeous.” you looked up at him with doe eyes and he felt like grabbing you and taking you away.

you were breathtaking and you looked at him as if he was god.

“thank you finn, do you mind maybe putting it in my hair?” he took the trinket and placed it above your ear, entangling in with your hair. your heels were on but untied so finnick got onto his knees before patting his knee. he grabbed the straps before tieing them. his fingertips worked quickly and his face was concentrated. he was done and he looked up at you before turning you to the mirror.

finnicks hands were on your shoulder as he leaned in to whisper, “all done, you look perfect sweetheart.” you turned before reaching up on your tiptoes, “thank you finnick!” you kissed him on his nose before turning back and finnick grinned, “aren’t you cute?” he stood behind you, attached like a shadow. your skin felt soft underneath his fingertips and he couldn’t help but wander. down your arms, to your waist, he could feel you tensing up underneath him and he could feel his face trying to fight off his smirk.

“finnick?” you breathed out, “what’re you doing?” your voice was small, and unsure. “tell me to stop.” you should. you should tell him to stop. but all you could think about was finnicks hands and how good they felt.

“it’s time!” damian shouted out as you peeled away from finnick to open the door. damian was all too happy to see you as he clapped his hands together. “ah, my special girl you are truly an angel.” finnick knew that. finnick has already said that. finnick had you in his arms and oh so close and this idiot took you away. his sweet girl.

finnick was wondering where his trident was so that he could impale him through the stomach.

“come on y/n.” he ushered you out the door but you managed to slip another look at finnick and all you saw was pure rage.

the interview went well, in your eyes at least.

caesar was as upbeat as usual and it did mostly centre around your dress and looks but you felt you could try your best to use it to your advantage.

the audience was enamoured and you felt you did your best. “and y/n, tell us, what’s your secret strategy for the games? any tricks up your sleeve?” you patted his knee before pointing at him jokingly, “well caesar, it wouldn’t be a secret if i divulged now would it?” everyone loved your answer and caesar doubled over, “aren’t you cheeky! isn’t our diamond here so playful? but a sweetheart nonetheless!” the crowd agreed loudly.

“now, since you came out i think we’ve all been wondering where that seashell came from. it doesn’t exactly match the theme of your outfit.” you could hear the murmurs from the crowd agreeing with his words.

“am i right in suspecting a certain blonde mentor of yours?” you pursed your lips and a giggle began to form as caesar pumped his fist in the air, “i think we got it! can we expect the two of you together once you win?” you’d never even had a boyfriend and here you were being put together with the finnick odair, you were sure everyone could tell how giddy you were.

you felt as if you had a million eyes on you, your whole body was heating up as you buried your head in your hands. “ah we caught her out! someone’s got a crush! but then again it’s finnick odair so don’t we all?” a bunch of cheers erupted as you beamed.

“well it was a wonderful to meet you, truly! our diamond here, y/n l/n!” screams and shouts directed your way came in full force as you waved at caesar and blew kisses to all. as you walked back you bumped into someone.

“y/n right?” the boy from three, theo.

you nodded and stuck your hand out, “nice to meet you!” he looked down at your hand and back up at you before laughing, “very formal, i like it. i’m theo, your dress is nice but i think the girl wearing it is breathtaking.” you giggled before tucking your hair behind your ear.

finnick stood with the other mentors and held himself back from shoving haymitch out the way to get him to stop rambling on. his grip on his glass was solid, so it wasn’t a surprise when it shattered. “oh my!” effie yelled out as finnick apologised before someone came to clean it up. he stepped around the person before excusing himself to get to you.

you were laughing, hard. what in panem was so funny?

you were wiping tears away from your eyes as finnick joined the two of you, his hand on your back as theo nodded at him, “finnick.” he hated him. why the hell did theo speak as if he knew him personally? his smug face was unbelievably irritating. “finnick! how’d i do?” and the second you spoke he felt the anger dissipate, he adored the way you waited for his response as if it held all the answers.

“you did well.” finnicks answer felt snippy and made you feel as if you’d done something wrong. “we should get going.” he directed you away from the boy as you shouted out, “i’ll see you around!”

the entire elevator ride was, to put it lightly, awkward. it left you feeling confined in what little space you and finnick had. “finn? are you okay?” you placed your hand on his arm and stood in-front of him. you were hoping he’d explain what was wrong but what you didn’t expect was to be pushed against the side of the elevator and finnick kissing you. his hand was on your waist again and he shuffled your dress up, slithering underneath.

you moaned in his mouth, his hands playing and gripping at your ass. in reaction, your fingers thread through his hair and your grip tightened, “finn- not here.” the elevator was glass and you were scared of people seeing. finnick found it hard to care, drunk off your perfume. in a panic, you pulled away from him, your hands cradling his face to make him listen. “i’ve… never,” the whisper hung over the both of you, the tension in the air thick and hot.

instead of being met with judgment, he murmured, “i’ll make it good for you, i promise.” finnick had finally gotten a taste, and he could only crave more. his lips met your neck, his warm tongue painting wet desire into your skin. it was almost too much for little old you, letting out quiet whimpers as he explored you. his sleeves were rolled and you needed to ground yourself, your nails dug into his veiny arms. “finn-” you protested but he could tell you didn’t want to. just a little longer and he could get you to give in. “just let me feel you.”

the elevator stopping brought the two of you back as you fixed your dress and finnick fixed his own hair, running his hands through it. he directed you out of the elevator and nodded in acknowledgment to the people entering. as you walked onto your floor you were met with servants, stylists and others. it seems damian and analise had taken it upon themselves to invite some friends and you were eager to meet them.

whereas finnick wanted to rip your dress off and take you till the morning.

the same dainty hands which were running all over him were shaking others and waving as you all sat down to eat. as everyone feasted away you couldn’t help but play with your own meal. you were flushed and all you wanted was to kiss finnick again. he was sitting next to you and wasn’t hungry for food, he wanted to eat something else.

your dress didn’t hide much of your chest and when you reclined in your seat, crossing your arms and pushing up your breasts?

finnick needed to see more.

the clattering of his fork on the floor drew the attention of some, but they went back to their conversations and bets. “i’ll get it for you.” you pushed back your seat and got down to your knees, flicking up the tables sheet and searched around for it before hitting cold metal. you reached your hand out with the fork to finnick. his cock was throbbing at the image of you on the floor, chest on display and a sweet smile on your face. he bent down and grinned, “you look good on your knees sweetheart.”

his words went straight down between your legs and your mouth fell open at his words.

such vulgar words from such a beautiful man.

his hand came down to close your jaw. you felt, weird. as you sat back on your chair you felt warm? but a good warm? it was tantalising. you wondered if it was normal.

finnick would tell you right?

“finnick.” his head turned your way, “what is it y/n?” you leaned closer and so did he, your hands cupped around his ear, “i feel weird.” his eyebrows shot up as a sign of interest, “oh? what’s wrong honey? where do you feel weird?” you gulped, your throat felt dry and for some reason it felt dirty to talk about.

your eyes drifted downwards and as you looked up finnicks eyes seemed darker. “here?” his touch was soft on your thigh underneath the table as you gasped.

“everything all right dear?” sarah questioned as you nodded. it felt so good, his touch. but it wasn’t exactly where needed, his hand trailed closer and higher, until it was gone. your head snapped up at him as he smirked at you, mocking you.

for the rest of the night he didn’t even pay attention to you. and you had no clue why.

you couldn’t sleep after the day you had and all your mind was thinking of was finnick. finnicks hands, his arms, his mouth, his words.

“i don’t bite, unless you want me to.”

“yes, here.”

“i’ll make it so good for you.”

“just let me feel you.”

“you look good on your knees sweetheart.”

your room was too quiet, making it unchallenging for your thoughts to run wild at the anticipation of finnick odair. you couldn’t bear it, so you left to the busiest room you could think of.

your leg was shaking up and down and your mind was pacing whilst your body couldn’t. the butterflies were practically knocking around in your stomach and you hoped perhaps finnick could help. he’d help you right? but he didn’t before. maybe he was just tired? you were so desperate for help and answers that you’d forgone knocking and walked right in.

only to be met with an extremely wet finnick odair.

by your luck your eyes were probably poking out of your head at the sight of him, you couldn’t help but stare. it was your first time being in the same room as a man so, naked? for the lack of a better word, he still had a very short towel wrapped around his bottom half. was it small? or did he make it look small?

“see something you like sweetie?” god his voice was so saccharine, how the hell did his voice work you up? “i- i wanted to t-talk.” and you were stuttering, great! he walked closer to you and you stepped back, all the way into his wall. “yeah? does my pretty girl wanna talk?” you nodded along dumbly as your breath quickened. “words sweetie, use your words.” you swallowed, “yes.”

his thumb caressed your cheek before brushing along your lips, “you sure you just want to talk?” and there they were, the butterflies. you shook your head, “no? what do you want?” you played with your night dress, “you?” it was a soft murmur and finnick wanted you to beg. he’d been pining after you since the second he saw you, it’s only fair right?

“where do you want me?” his words were hot in your ear, his body was wet and your white night dress was suddenly see through. his hand rested on your ass, “here?” you shook your head, “no?” his thumb brushed over your nipple as your nails pressed into his neck, pulling him into yours. your breath was heavy and he was unrelenting.

his hand moved from your ass to cup your front as you gasped, “here?” you nodding along dumbly, “please finnick, i’ve been wanting you for the whole day, i’ll be good for you i promise.” your words were music to his ears, “yeah? you’re gonna be good f’me?”

“yes, yes, yes.” you whined as you wrapped your arms around his neck. standing on your tiptoes as you bit your lip. “you gonna let me use you yeah? do whatever i want?” you were practically jumping up and down at this point, your tits with you. your straps were pushed down as your dress fell down to the floor. his cock was throbbing at the sight of you, he’d been waiting for this.

“then on your knees honey.” you were quick to obey as he pushed you down to the cold floor, his towel quickly ripped off, courtesy of you.

it was your first time doing anything sexual so any cock was bound to be big in your eyes. finnick loved the sight of you on your knees, innocent as ever. fully nude, hands slotted nicely between your thighs. he wanted to ruin you. he ran his hand along his dick, pumping it before resting the tip on your lips.

as if you were on auto-control, your lips parted to let him through. a salty taste flooded through your mouth as he cooed down at you.

“you’re doing so well for me.”

“pretty baby on her knees, who knew you’d be such a slut?”

your eyes flickered up at him as you moved your head forwards on your own accord. “fuck.” he groaned as you replaced his hands with yours.

he wanted to go easy on you.

but kitten licks at the tip and soft kisses weren’t doing it for him. you opened your mouth again, gaining confidence and feeding off of finnicks praises. his large hand placed on the back of your head, fingers spread out as he thrusted down your throat.

the sounds that filled his room were lewd. squelches and groans as you tried your best to keep going. your cheeks hollowed out as finnick guided you, “relax your throat, try breathe through your nose. if it’s too much just tap my thigh sweetie.”

you retracted, catching your breath as you gazed up at him whilst simultaneously blinking away the tears in your eyes but a few fell free. he couldn’t help but moan. your messy mouth mixed with your saliva and his pre-cum. “you think theo’s this big? you think he could make you choke on his dick?” you shook your head immediately.

his member felt cold without the warmth of your mouth, but he was feeling nice so he let you take a break. “too big for you sweetie?” you shook your head furiously, “naw is my baby tough?” you giggled as you wrapped your lips around him again, your tongue flat against the underside of his dick as he eased himself in. “ah- fuck.”

but he can only hold out for so long as he began to fasten his pace, chasing his high. your fingers dug into his thighs right under his ass, for some reason you seemed to have something to prove as you took him all the way. your moans egged him on as his hips thrust forwards, “so good f’me, my s-sweet girl.” his praises fueled you on as your nose met his naval. salty tears fell down your cheeks and finnick was in his right mind to lick them all up.

god you were better than he’d imagined. and trust him, he’d imagined a lot.

“swallow for me yeah? be a good girl and open wide.” thick cum coated your tongue as you gladly accepted. finnick proudly gazed upon your painted face. watery eyes, sticky face. all for him. you gulped it down before wiping off the remaining waste on your face, eyeing finnick up before licking it off your fingers.

“what happened to the diamond? only a whore for me right?” your fingers were wet as you pulled them out. “uh-huh.” your agreed as he pulled you up. “do you even know what that means?” he teased as you puckered your lips before shaking your head. “thought so, you wanna be good for me?” you nodded, “on the bed baby.”

you sat down on the bed as you waited for finnick to join you. he situated himself between your legs, running his hands along them. “lean back for me. you took me so well, you want me to make you feel good too?” your eyes widened at the idea, “yes please finn.” his hands reached up and rested under your breasts, “i don’t know if you’ve earned it honey.” your lips twisted into a slight frown, your waterline glazing over.

“i was! i did what you asked finn, please.”

he palmed your breast, massaging it softly as you threw your head back, “please. please keep going.” your begging was more than enough for him, his baby asked so nicely no?

“yeah? you like me playing with you?” incoherent babbles fell from your lips as finnicks mouth kissed your breast. his hand trailed down to feel you, and he was met with warm wetness. the moan you let out was ungodly, “finnick please! oh god it feels so- so good.” he couldn’t help admire you, eyes screwed shut, hands clutching the pristine white sheets.

“oh baby, can you be quiet for me? quiet for finn?” a string of ‘uh-huhs’ came from your mouth as finnick slid a finger into you, a tight fit. “oh my god!” you yelped before slamming your hand over your mouth. he was knuckle deep as he worked his finger in before curling it, then another, then another. his free hand was pushing your hips down into the mattress as your hips lifted upwards with every move he made.

“finnick, finnick. you feel so good.” you cried out as he retracted his fingers before curling them upwards. he knew exactly what to do, where to be, what to say. his name fell from your lips like a prayer and your nails raked down his back as he grunted.

now, finnicks fingers were one thing, but his mouth?

his tongue pressed against your clit and you swear you saw god, finnick was probably the god. his tongue flicked over your clit as his fingers entered your cunt again, the pressure in your stomach was building so high you were afraid of the fall.

a wave of pleasure fell over you as finnick talked you through it, “that’s it baby, let go.” he hovered over you as his fingers worked your cunt. your nails had bloodied his back, scratched raw. as you moved your fingers finnick hissed into your ear. “m’ sorry, m’ so so sorry.” your head was spinning and you wanted to rest, but apparently finnick had other ideas as he lowered himself to your core. your mind was hazy as your hand clutched the pillow your head laid on, the other twisted in his hair.

“what’re you doing?” finnicks green eyes pierced through you as he raised his head from in between your thighs. featherlight kisses trailed upwards to your pussy as your thighs twitched and closed around his head, still sensitive as ever. “just want a taste, clean you up.” he mumbled as he tongue breached your entrance and you were back where you were before.

this man was driven youd give him that.

“finn s’ too much, please.” your words were slurred as he delved inside. he couldn’t find it in himself to let up, you were so sweet, he just wanted a taste. so he kept going, his tongue, his hands, his words. if there was one thing you knew about finnick it was that he could talk anyone into anything. so you found yourself squirming underneath his strong arms, forearm pinning you down to the bed as he made your back arch and your toes curl.

“sweet baby, so sweet.” all attempts of getting away, only caused him to get annoyed with you, can’t you just lay down and let him ruin you? at this point it was for his pleasure rather than yours. your thighs were practically squeezing his head and neck but he kept going. you didn’t know where to put your hands, pulling his hair was no good. your hand somehow ended up on your clit, moving in a circular motion as the other palmed your breast.

each time he made you come you rested your head, energy depleted. but again he ended up between your legs and pathetic pleas from you did nothing to make him stop.

“wanna make you feel good.”

“just one more, you can take it sweetheart.”

when your fourth rolled around you were so far gone. “pretty baby, not a single thought up there huh?” you couldn’t even bring yourself to respond, and he didn’t expect you to. he brushed away the stray hairs from your face and kissed you passionately. “you did so well f’me honey. made me proud, you got one more in you for me?” it wasn’t a question, his dick was painfully hard and he only knew of one solution.

you tiredly shook your head, “no more finny.” he grinned, “no? you don’t want my cock?” your breath hitched at his words and you knew you were fucked. “mhm. want it.” you were reduced to one to two words in a sentence.

“yeah you do. on your knees baby.” you tiredly rolled over, situating yourself on your knees and the palms of your hands as finnick kneaded your ass. his hands grazed over the skin before-

smack!

“think you should be able to see yourself baby.” his hand yanked at your hair as you found your reflection glaring back at you. “so pretty, aren’t you?” finnick knew you were horrible at accepting compliments and he was more than happy to use it against you.

smack!

you’d taken too long to answer, but based on finnicks smug expression you could tell he was hoping for it. “you have to answer baby.” finnicks arm came across your waist, pulling you up, flush with his chest as his hands pawed at your chest.

“you wanna be my baby yeah?” you could only manage moans and finnick was not happy. he threw you forwards as you caught yourself with your hands infront of you.

smack!

“fucked you so good you can’t even talk.” he taunted you as he dragged his cock in between your drenched folds. finnicks groans were deep, and so hot. “you know how long i wanted to fuck you baby? in that short skirt on the train? when you licked up that cream? my girls dirty huh?” you didn’t respond and it only fuelled his fire, he’d wanted you for so long and now you had the audacity to ignore him?

he thrusted into you without warning and you screamed out. “want to act like a slut? i’ll treat you like one. fuck!” your walls were squeezing down on him, sucking him in and he was more than happy to oblige. his hips snapped against your ass as you gripped onto the sheets for dear life. his grip on your hips bruised, leaving a fiery impression in their wake. finnick had stamina for days, he was strong and built. you were small and fragile, finnick was glad to be the one to break you in.

he pulled you up to him again as he kissed you frantically, capturing your bottom lip in between his teeth. he was relentless in his pursuit for his high, he marked up any place he could as he continued to drive into you with determination.

“bet you dreamed of this, of me.” his hand gripped your throat, his eyes bore into your own, finnick was inescapable. every touch, every thrust, all him. you were enveloped in his being and he worshipped yours. finnick continued to pound into you harshly, cock gliding easily against your inner walls. he was deep inside but he wanted to be deeper. “yes! yes! harder!” you cried out.

his hand pressed down onto your stomach, “feel that?” his breath was prominent by your ear, “oh god!” you exclaimed, it felt as if you were filled to the brim as he bottomed out in you. thick, hot cum released into you as his and your moans were raising in pitch and his hips began to stutter.

the room was filled with the sound of slapping skin, the promise of silence forgotten. “let go baby, you’re close. let go.” the two of you had eachother and it was more than enough. his groans were deep and animalistic as he spilled himself inside you. your hand reached behind you to caress his neck. thank yous spilled out from you, your whole being was ignited, you never knew you could feel so good.

the two of you lied together, entangled in sheets and a mess of limbs. you couldn’t tell where finnick odair began and y/n l/n started. all you knew was that he was yours, and you were his.

you’d fallen asleep a bit ago, your chest rising and falling steadily. finnicks arm curled around you as you rested on his chest. from the moonlight spilling into his room he could view the bruises tattering your smooth skin. as he traced over them he couldn’t help but grin, he could imagine you limping in the arena.

you sure as hell weren’t forgetting him anytime soon.

#dark!finnick odair x fem!reader #dark!finnick odair x reader #finnick odair x fem!reader #hunger games x reader #finnick odair x female reader #finnick odair x you #finnick x reader #finnick imagine #finnick odair smut #finnick odair x reader

[joelsgreys]

baby, i’m yours

Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Female Reader

summary: You remind Joel that you’re his.

warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. READER HAS NO PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION however she does wear Joel’s t-shirt and he semi lifts her onto a counter? sorta but not really? UNSPECIFIED AGE GAP (Joel is in his 50’s but reader’s specific age is not mentioned). established relationship, sort of. consumption of food (if you are allergic to peanuts, i so sorry). angst, Joel and Ellie’s strained relationship is lightly implied, Joel is insecure, it’s implied reader did some horrible things in her past, reassurance, brief smut, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, consider it a quickie idk. apologies if i missed anything.

word count: 2.6k

a/n: this short lil thing has been sitting in my drafts forever. i finished it while i was in ireland and finally had the chance to sit down and do a quick edit and when i say it was quick, i flew through it so i could hop onto my next wip so please excuse any errors! here’s a spotify link to the song if anyone’s curious, it’s an oldie but a goodie although it may not be everyone’s cup of tea.

main masterlist l fic notifs

Joel rolls over in bed, his arm outstretched and seeking the warmth of your soft, naked body.

“Mmph,” a small, sleepy groan falls from his lips as his long, thick fingers feel around on your side of the bed—of his bed. Of course, you have your very own bedroom in the house you all had been placed in when you first arrived in Jackson. Your very own bed to sleep in is just down the hallway, but lately, you’ve been waking up beside him a lot more often than not, especially now that Ellie’s a bit older and she’s gone and made herself her own space out in the garage behind the house. Being under the same roof as Joel did those two more harm than it did good, and while you missed having her around, it was for the best.

“She’ll come around, Joel,” you’d assured him. “I know she will. She just needs a bit of time is all.”

“Hope you’re right, darlin’,” he had murmured sadly in response.

Still lost somewhere in between sleep and full consciousness, Joel continues feeling around for you, but all he finds are the wrinkled sheets, cold and abandoned. Confused, his eyes finally flutter open and with a painful protest from his sore, stiff back, he sits up, blinking furiously as he looks around the darkness of his bedroom. The door’s been left cracked open ever so slightly, and as his vision adjusts now that he’s fully awake, he notices the dim glow of the hallway light that’s peeking through into the room.

He turns and glances over at the old digital alarm clock perched on his nightstand, the obnoxious, bright red numbers practically screaming at him that it’s a quarter past midnight. With a small, tired grunt, Joel switches on the lamp beside the clock and swings his legs over the side of the mattress, goosebumps erupting across his flesh the instant that his bare feet meet the cold, hardwood floor. He stands and fumbles around for his clothes, which he’d tossed carelessly somewhere over his shoulder hours earlier when he’d been lost in the heat of the moment with you. He finds his faded, navy blue sweatpants strewn across a chair next to the door and pulls them on over his naked lower body before searching for his t-shirt. When he doesn’t immediately see it, he doesn’t bother, figuring that it’s just going to come back off when he climbs back into bed with you.

Padding out of his bedroom, he makes his way down the hallway, heading towards the staircase. As he draws closer, he hears it—the soft music that’s coming from downstairs.

Baby, I'm yours

and I'll be yours until the stars fall from the sky

yours until the rivers all run dry

in other words, until I die

He’s led towards the kitchen and that’s where he finds you.

Joel wants to be annoyed. 

Fuck, he tries to be annoyed. But he can’t help the way that the corners of his mouth threaten to turn upwards when his eyes take in the sight before him.

You’re standing at the center island slowly swaying your hips from side to side along to the beat of the song that’s playing from the record player perched next to the instant coffee maker on the counter behind you. He’d nearly wrung your neck when he found out what all you had traded just to get your hands on it, but you loved that thing more than life itself it seemed, so he couldn’t stay mad for very long. You’re making yourself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich—the peanut butter you’d learned how to make yourself with the old food processor he found deep in one of the kitchen cabinets, and the strawberry preserves you had picked up from the market earlier that week. Clad in nothing but his t-shirt, you’re singing along quietly to the lyrics as you finish making your late night snack.

Baby, I’m yours

and I’ll be yours until the sun no longer shines

yours until the poets run out of rhyme

in other words, until the end of time

Joel leans against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his bare chest as he watches you carefully lick the remnants of peanut butter off of the knife you’re using before setting it down on the counter. You then pick up the two pieces of bread and slap them together—you’d also learned how to bake homemade bread using some old nineties cookbook you had found in the commune’s library. Your sourdough is the reason he had to go up a notch in his belt.

Sandwich in hand, you do a little spin, humming happily as you take your first bite.

Joel loudly clears his throat from the doorway.

Startled, you whirl around and freeze, your eyes wide.

“Enjoyin’ yourself there, darlin’?” He asks amusedly as he approaches you.

“Jesus Christ! You scared me, Joel!” You hiss at him. You then realize what time of night it is and a look of guilt crosses your features. “Oh shit. I’m sorry, did I wake you up? I honestly thought that I had the volume down low enough in here—”

Frowning, you turn around and reach towards the record player to turn the music off, but much to your surprise, Joel stops you. “No, s’okay. I woke up on my own,” he assures you. “I reached over for you and you were gone.” The admission slips before he can even think to stop it. He notices how taken aback you are by what he’d just said and quickly asks, “What’cha doin’ up so late, anyway?”

“I was hungry,” you tell him, sheepishly holding up your food. You always have one hell of an appetite after Joel was through fucking you senseless. You take another bite and offer it to him. “Want some?”

“Sure.”

He accepts and takes a corner of the sandwich before handing it back to you. His fingers brush against yours and his face burns at the contact.

Fucking Christ. 

You’re standing there in nothing but his fucking t-shirt after he had, yet again, made you his in his own fucking bed, and that’s what gets him?

Truth be told, the only time he holds your hand is when he’s inside of you—his fingers lace with your own as he comforts you and praises you for being such a good girl for taking his cock the way you do.

For being so, so fucking good for him.

He’s thought about taking your hand in front of others. Particularly when he notices the way some of the men in town stare at you. Joel wants to make it known that you’re already spoken for. Only, you’re not spoken for, not really. 

You’re his, but you’re not really his. It’s not that he doesn’t want to take the leap and acknowledge the two of you are far more than just patrol partners, far more than just two people who fought like fucking hell to get some smart assed teenager—and the world’s only hope for a cure—across the country.

He feels undeserving of it. Of you and your heart.

Several seasons had come and gone since you’d both arrived in Jackson with Ellie in tow, and somehow, Joel still can’t fathom what you’re doing by his side. She’s out of the house now and there’s nothing tying you to him, so why are you still here?

He’s so much older. Closer and closer to being on his way out, while you still had your entire life left ahead of you. He’s worn down, hardened from the post outbreak world. And you, you hadn’t lost any of your softness, your sweetness. Not even after the things you’d been forced to do to survive because of him.

You could meet someone younger, someone closer to your own age. You could marry, even start a family. You could be with someone who could give you a good life, the life you deserve.

The life that he’s too fucking broken to give you.

“Joel?” Your voice breaks into his thoughts. “Hey. Are you okay?”

“Yeah. M’fine.” He gestures to the record player with a nod of his head. “Y’know, this song’s older than me. By a few years. Came out in the early sixties.”

Joel half expects you to make some wisecrack joke and tease him over his age like you have done in the past—especially when the kid would get you going. Instead, he watches you set what’s left of your sandwich down and brush the crumbs from your hands before holding one of them out to him.

Confused, he stares at it for a moment before his dark eyes meet yours. “What are you doin’?”

“Dance with me,” you say, smiling at him.

“You’re fuckin’ kiddin’ me, right?” When he realizes you’re being serious, he shakes his head. “Y’know I don’t—I can’t dance.”

Dropping your hand back down to your side, you turn around and flip the record, starting the song over again before whirling back around and taking Joel’s hands in yours.

“Just follow my lead,” you tell him as you place them on your waist. Your own hands settle themselves on his broad shoulders, his skin warm beneath your fingertips. “Don’t overthink it.”

“You’re fuckin’ ridiculous,” Joel grumbles underneath his breath, however he finds himself moving along with you without further protest. Subconsciously, he pulls you closer against him as the two of you slowly sway from side to side along to the beat of the music. He chuckles, “Y’know we gotta be up at the asscrack of dawn for patrol, right?”

“And your point is?” You rest your head on his shoulder and exhale a soft, contended sigh.

Joel’s lips threaten to pull down once more.

Could it be that you’re actually content with him?

Head still on his shoulder, you sing along softly with Barbara Lewis. 

“I’m gonna stay right here by your side

do my best to keep you satisfied

nothing in this world can drive me away

‘cause every day you'll hear me say…”

It quickly becomes too much for him. Joel’s hands leave your waist. Taking your wrists, he tugs your arms from around his neck and gently pushes you away from him. “Why?” he finally asks the question that’s been hanging off the tip of his tongue for the better part of the last three years. “Why me?”

You stare at him, puzzled. “What?”

“Why me?” he repeats himself. “Why me when you can have anyone else—”

Your reply is prompt and you say it so simply.

“Because I don’t want anyone else.”

“You deserve better.”

You peer at him curiously. “I deserve better?”

“You do. Ain’t got no business being with someone like me. After all the terrible shit I’ve done—”

“I did the same exact shit, Joel. Sometimes I did even fucking worse.” Somehow, softness laces your tone. You have never been angry with him and you weren’t about to start now. “What makes my hands any cleaner than yours?”

Joel begins to sputter. “M’older than you. Much older. Should’a been a lot more careful. Should’a done more so you didn’t have to do those things.”

His hands still curled around your wrists, you reach up and gingerly cradle the sides of his face. He winces, but then quickly melts into your touch, the very same touch that could heal his wounds, if only he would allow it.

“I made my own choices,” you remind him, quietly. Neither of you realize the music has stopped. “Quit acting like blood doesn’t stain my hands too because it does.”

His lips press into a tight line. “Blood stains your hands ‘cause of me. S’my fault. I was responsible for you. I was s’pposed to take care of you. I didn’t protect you the way I should’ve.”

You sigh.

“When are you going to stop blaming yourself, Joel?”

The muscle in his jaw ticks as it clenches. He averts his gaze, his eyes falling to the floor. He doesn’t answer.

You stroke the scruff of his beard lightly with your thumbs. “When are you going to stop thinking you’re not good enough for me? What’s it going to take for me to prove to you that you are all I could ever need and want?”

“You’re just wastin’ your fuckin’ life on me, darlin’. S’the truth and you fuckin’ know it as well as I do.”

Pulling your wrists out of his hands, you pivot on your heel and suck in a sharp breath, stubbornly blinking back the tears stinging your eyes. You’re frustrated.

It cuts you to your very core to know the man you’ve grown to love more than anything and anyone else on what’s left of this fucking planet can’t see that he’s enough. He’s more than enough.

Joel bites back his own frustrated sigh. He knows he can’t rely on you to tell him, rely on the reassurance—he needs to do his part and believe it. If he keeps trying to push you away, he just may very well succeed one day. He will lose you.

After a moment, he walks up behind you and wraps his arms around you, his lips lightly brushing your neck. “M’sorry,” he mumbles, his own voice thickening as a lump forms in the back of his throat. He’s quick to swallow it down. “Jus’ have a hard time believin’ you’re mine. S’almost like my mind is lookin’ to prove me wrong.”

“But I am yours, Joel. I’m yours, I’m fucking yours.”

It’s more than just reassurance. It’s an oath, one you’ll honor for the rest of your life.

He holds you tighter. “Yeah?” He nips at the delicate spot right below your ear, his teeth scraping along tender flesh. “S’that right, baby? You’re all mine?”

“All yours,” you confirm breathlessly as his hands slowly begin trailing down the length of your sides, his fingers skimming the hem of his t-shirt.

Joel swiftly turns you around in his arms and slips his hand between your thighs. The next thing you know, he has you backed up against the counter and he’s shoving his sweatpants down, freeing his hard, thick cock. With one of your legs hooked around his waist, he buries himself into the warmth of your cunt and begins to deliver smooth, languid strokes.

“Say it again, baby,” he rasps into your neck. He coaxes your other leg up and around his waist and his large hands curl securely underneath your thighs as he bucks up into you. He’d deal with the back pain later. He pants, “Need—need to hear you say it, my sweet girl.”

You hold onto the countertop behind you as he fucks you, your fingernails digging into the laminated wood. “Fuck, I’m yours,” you moan into his shoulder. “I’m all yours, Joel. Oh fuck—”

You say it over and over again and he believes it.

He finally fucking believes it.

Sweet nothings fall from his lips with each thrust.

“S’lucky you’re all fuckin’ mine.”

“My beautiful, beautiful girl.”

“Gonna keep you for the rest of my fuckin’ life.”

When he spills into you, there’s no regret on his part nor yours. You’d always wanted to feel him come inside of you—secretly, so did he. Joel’s deep, guttural groans bounce off of the kitchen walls as your pussy fills with him, with all of him, taking as much as it can before he begins leaking out of you and down the insides of your thighs.

“Jesus,” he exhales. He dips his head for a kiss. “You’re all messy now, baby,” he mumbles against your lips. “How’s about we go upstairs and get back into bed so I can clean you up?”

Giggling, you mimic him and remind him of what he’d said earlier. “Y’know we gotta be up at the asscrack of dawn for patrol, right?”

Joel grins. “And your point is?”

You laugh again as he leads you out of the kitchen and back up to his bedroom—to yours and his bedroom.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller smut #joel miller angst #joel miller fluff #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller drabble #joel miller one shot #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #tlou fic #joel fic

[nateezfics]

I don’t know if it would reach you but I’ll give it a try

ATEEZ reaction to Make-Up Sex after their S/O distancing themselves after a fight

MAKE UP SEX WITH ATEEZ

PAIRING — ateez x reader

GENRE — smut, romance, angst (the slightest bit), make up, boyfriend!ateez, fem!reader, sub!reader, soft dom!ateez

WARNINGS — mentions of arguments, smut, unprotected sex, make up sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, use of pet names (baby), intentional lower case and small font, intentional word abbreviations

WORD COUNT — 1.2k

SUMMARY — make up sex with ateez after an argument.

HONGJOONG

“c’mon, baby. need to hear you. please.”

his thrusts increased in speed, fucking into you at a rhythm just as messy as his thoughts. your moans poured out of you, your hands clutching at his back until he groaned at the way your nails pierced his skin. he soaked up every last one of your cries, reveled in the way you clung to him like a lifeline. god, he’d missed your voice, missed you. he hated arguing, even more so when he knew he was in the wrong. your silence was the worst part of it all; he wasn’t able to stand it not even a day before he was clambering back to you.

hongjoong’s hips pistoned into you with a purpose to pull every last sound from you until you were falling apart underneath him. you cried into the nape of his neck, your hold on his back never letting up. “hongjoong, hongjoong, hongjoong…”

his name on your tongue was enough to undo him. he held you close to him quickly after, kissing all over your face and showering you with proclamations of love and apologies.

SEONGHWA

“fuck, i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry, baby.”

seonghwa was urgent, desperate to make you fall apart. his thrusts were hurried and they were deep, cockhead kissing against that sweet spot inside you repeatedly. he buried his face in your neck, kissing your warm skin. his hand searched over the sheets for yours until he found it. his fingers locked with yours and he gave you a loving squeeze. it was little actions like this that reminded you of how much he adored you. and you reveled in the little acts of love, thankful to have a boyfriend that cared enough for you to show his love for you after arguments.

“seonghwa,” you breathed between moans. “i love you.”

seonghwa smiled. you forgave him. “i love you, too.”

YUNHO

“i love you. so damn much. gonna make you feel better, baby.”

yunho’s breath was hot against your ear. his lips rested just at your temple as you sat across his lap, your arms around his shoulders while one of his hands touched you between your thighs. two long fingers stuffed your leaky hole, making you mewl into his neck. he felt your hold on him grow tighter, and he smiled. he kissed your temple. he scissored you open, preparing you for his cock later, fucking your pussy with his fingers until he felt your slick begin to drip down his hand.

“l-love you,” you whispered, though it was almost too much to manage as his fingers brought you closer to an orgasm. “i feel s’good, yunho.”

and yunho kept making you feel good, eventually breaking you apart on his cock and fucking you until your argument was long forgotten.

YEOSANG

“please, wanna know how good i’m making you feel. wanna make it up to you.”

yeosang’s hands were placed on either side of your hips, guiding you up and down on his cock. he watched you, witnessing the view of you above him, your head rolled back and mouth agape. you looked divine like this, and all he wanted to do was make you feel this good forever.

your hands found stability on his thighs as you began to lose yourself to the pleasure. “i feel good, yeo. fuck, so good.”

yeosang urged you to an orgasm, cursing under his breath as he watched you fall apart from above. you clamped around him like a vice and his cock throbbed with need to release, but he withheld his own end. he flipped you over until you were flat against the mattress, taking his spot above you. he didn’t waste any time before sliding back into you with a languid thrust.

“give me one more, please. don’t wanna stop until i’m sure i’ve earned your forgiveness.”

SAN

“don’t wanna fight ever again. just wanna be with you like this. god i’m so sorry, baby.”

san hugged you tightly, keeping your frame firm against his. your back was against his chest, his hands fondling your breasts, and his mouth at your ear. his cock drove into you so deep and slow it made your brain short circuit, turning to mush in your skull. he fucked you with practiced precision, it was like he was trying to use his body to tell you how sorry he was. one of his hands left your chest to grip the bend of your knee and pull your leg up to offer him a better angle.

with each thrust, the memory of the argument began to vanish. all you were able to think about was him and the rapidly approaching orgasm. “i forgive you, san, just make me cum. please, please, please!”

“oh baby,” san cooed with a kiss to your ear. “don’t you worry. i’m gonna make you cum. gonna make you fall apart, and then do it all over again. gotta make up for all the lost time, yeah?”

MINGI

“sorry, sorry, sorry. let me kiss it better. please, baby.”

mingi’s large hands gripped at your thighs firmly but tenderly. he had you splayed open before him as he feasted on your essence, pouring every ounce of himself into your pleasure. his pointy nose bumped your clit just as his tongue passed between your folds and your back arched prettily off the mattress. he needed to make you feel good to make up for the fight, to use his tongue to show you how truly sorry he was.

“mingi, ‘m gonna cum…” you sounded so sweet, and fuck, you tasted even sweeter. he pressed his face further into your cunt.

“gonna make you cum as much as you want to, baby.”

WOOYOUNG

“wanna make you cry from pleasure, not from pain. fuck, i’m sorry baby.”

wooyoung’s thumb wiped a fallen tear away, palm warm against your cheek. he gazed down at you just as he pushed himself in again. your lips trembled and brows furrowed; you looked so beautiful when you cried from how good he was making you feel. it was a much better sight than seeing you cry after arguing with him, and much better than hearing your sniffles from the locked bedroom. he caressed your cheek with his thumb while his hips quickened in tempo, cooing at you sweetly as you began to whimper.

“wooyoung, please.” your plea was soft, broken. he soothed you with kisses against your forehead. he kept the same pace, hips gliding back and forth until you were coming undone underneath him.

he was there to console you, to guide you through your high with tender touches and words.

JONGHO

“i love you. please, need to hear you say you still love me, too.”

jongho wasn’t able to keep his hands off you. he caressed your frame, attentive to every dip and curve, as his cock slid in and out of you. you were breathless under him, mouth opening and closing like you were attempting to speak. “please, baby.”

you swallowed a moan. you gripped his wrists at either side of your face, holding onto them like a lifeline as you tried to gather your thoughts. “i lo—” a moan, “love you, jongho. s’much.” and no argument could ever change that.

jongho dipped his head down until his forehead was against yours. his eyes found yours, and he adored the way yours were glazed over from the pleasure. he smiled lovingly, and the sight made your insides flutter. “you’re amazing.” jongho followed up his words with an increase in tempo, fucking you deep until you fell apart under the weight of pleasure and love.

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NETWORKS — @kflixnet @wonderlandnet

ALL FICS ARE THE ORIGINAL IDEAS AND WRITTEN WORKS OF NATEEZFICS. DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. REPOSTING WITHOUT CONSENT FROM THE AUTHOR NATEEZFICS IS PROHIBITED!

#wonderlandnet #ateez smut #ateez smut drabbles #ateez x reader #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa x reader #yunho x reader #yeosang x reader #san x reader #mingi x reader #wooyoung x reader #jongho x reader #ateez fanfiction #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines