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#ig we can just ignore that
fried-manto · 24 days
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Apologies.
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there is something so insanely poetic about abed being scared of change / the inevitable parting of ways for the study group in the first episode of season 4, and jeff's fear of leaving / the possibility of becoming who he was before greendale in the last episode of season 4.
the fact that by the end of the first episode of season 4, it's 3 levels of a fabricated/daydreamt "Winger speech" in abed's head that pulls him back to not only reality, but the acceptance that graduating/leaving is going to be okay in the end. jeff was the one who grounded him and made him feel okay with moving on, even though it was a fake one in his head. the thought of jeff comforting him and giving him support alone was enough to make him confident again in the semester.
i think this sense of comfort for abed stems from the 'my dinner with andre' homage episode. probably because abed learned more about jeff, and you can see the exact second that he realizes their conversation is more real than expected when jeff dumps his phone in the water. (you know, that thing he spends hours pretending to text on so that his friends don't see him for who he is? so he can avoid being vulnerable?) jeff was vulnerable to abed and abed didn't know how to deal with that in the moment. he realized that he meant a greater deal to jeff than he had initially thought. when they have their moment at the bar after the dinner, abed is visibly worried that jeff doesn't want to be his friend anymore because of the homage (his fist below the bar on his lap is tense and relaxes the second that jeff smiles at him), until jeff tells him "i don't need you to grow or change." a season and a half later, this is still what keeps abed grounded regarding his relationship to jeff. that's why when a voluntary change on jeff's side came by, he didn't know how to deal with it (plotwise, friendship wise, the future of the school year). it's imaginary jeff who reassures him, once again, that no matter what happens, everything is going to be okay between them.
and then it gets even prettier when you think about jeff's perspective.
at the beginning of s4 e13, jeff confides in britta about his anxiety of graduating and leaving greendale, and what that would mean for "everybody else", in particular abed. throughout the entire episode, we have no stable answer as to whether any of the plot (the dark timeline) is real or not, especially with the chaos of the remedial theory episode until towards the end, during the dark study group v our study group paintball fight. here, its abed who reveals to jeff that this is all just a daydream and in his own head. it's not abed who is scared of change, not anymore, its jeff himself. he's scared of reverting back to who he was, four years ago, before meeting his friends and becoming a compassionate person. abed is the one to give him that motivational push this time and encourage him to fight his own fears head on. abed is the one who gives him the heads up of it all being okay.
its an exact mirroring of how jeff helps abed in his own imagination, and both see the other as a comfort for the uncertainty of the future. it's so amazing, especially when you think about how it's jeff who is having these "dark timeline" daydreams in a moment of emotional insecurity, much like abed did earlier in season three. even in the remedial chaos theory episode, it's abed who stops jeff from rolling the die to see who picks up the pizza. jeff thinks the same thing would happen this time for the graduation, but he stops himself after abed's imaginary speech.
there's a lot of bullshit with season 4 and people disliking it, calling it "the gas leak year" both on screen and off, but i thought the relationship of jeff and abed is so important here for the most part. i still haven't gone past episode 1 of season 5, mainly because after the end of the 1st one i got so upset that i didnt watch it open netflix for 3 days, and because my sister just started watching it! so i would rather just watch alongside with her from the start of s1 and lead up to beginning s5 and 6 with her.
a lot of this can also be read platonically/unromantically too, i just personally love their relationship a lot and find them underrated. they are so clearly two sides of the same coin and mirror each other in more ways than the others; even their falling out towards the end of the show where abed becomes more of a jaded cynic to jeff's protagonist role, while jeff becomes a more self-loathing depressed bastard. i know i havent gotten to s5 or 6 yet, but i've seen scenes and read things about their relationship then. not really a fan, but whatever.
tldr; jeff and abed are each other's comfort people and it's explicitly shown various times within the show, but most notable in season four; with abed's imaginary winger speech drawing him out of anxiety of the future, and jeff's imaginary abed speech drawing him out of the anxiety of graduating.
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ilynpilled · 10 months
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Kinda unfair/or unpredictable question but do you think at some point in the next books Jaime and Daenerys will interact to a higher degree? Or better question -- do you think that's a good idea? Jaime has so much personal trauma with the Targaryen family, it feels like it may be realistic to have a meaningful conversation with Dany. (If he's surviving his current predicament which I think he will :P) Though maybe it'd just be beneficial for Jaime, and Dany is not interested in dwelling on it
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and i find it interesting that this jape is in the chapter where all this significant rhaegar talk happens:
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all this could mean nothing, and these things are hard to predict, and i think the show especially offers very little in this regard considering how much the stories of these two in specific were shifted in certain directions, so this is all i am gonna say anon: i do think the set up for an interaction can be interpreted from the text. dany is “rhaegar returning” in some form, so maybe there is more to that “talk that never was” than just tragic irony. when and how and exactly what it would mean for them at that point? idk. i just think jaime (and only jaime, as he would likely be the last living “monster from viserys’ stories about RR” by that point: not only was jaime kept closer bc he was a hostage, but barristan doesn’t really dwell on rhaella’s abuse, and it is possible that he will not live to be the one to communicate the extent of the ‘real aerys’ to dany, he was dancing around it in the text so far thats fs + brienne knows about the wildfire plot but that would be significantly less personal, same with the pieces just being put together after KL goes up in flames imo, which they likely will be, but i just think it would be missing that ‘personal layer’) holds information that dany does want to learn, and him telling her could bring a lot of things full circle for them as characters (+dany and rhaella have a number of parallels, and i do think that piece of information for example, as painful as it is, would hold significance to her and her understanding of her family other than just a form of closure, especially relating to a major theme concerning the downfall of house targaryen and the abuse and oppression the women faced from their male counterparts following jaehaerys’s rule, the dance, complete patriarchal hegemony etc. and that whole downfall did culminate in aerys and everything he represents, and her experience with viserys is also an extension of all that). idk if jaime is meant to confess the wildfire/kingslayer thing in specific to anyone other than brienne (from a more thematic perspective), but who knows, especially if he does live past a KL going down in flames scenario, which is possible because there is a set up for him wielding widow’s wail which is there rn. the whole rhaegar motif in jaime chapters was always something that i found interesting (i have a very specific interpretation of a parallel/anti-parallel with the children that i think is actually unrelated to dany/jon etc, but i am too lazy to get into that right now.) but yeah he is the pov character with the second most mentions of rhaegar by name in the text as he is a key manifestation of guilt, the first one being dany obviously. if not, then george has bran + magic to get that info to dany ig. we will see in like 20 years lol
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welcometogrouchland · 3 months
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they shouldn't let me stay up past midnight bc then I start identifying every single problem I've ever had. No solutions found. Net zero personal progress and 0.5 hours of sleep are achieved
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punkstylerecovery · 3 months
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I think today is the first time I've ever been told that I've tried really hard to advocate for myself. I'm very anxious and sometimes I can't speak (which may be related to my autism? not sure), so I always feel like part of the reason people treat me the way they often do is because I don't advocate for myself properly or "enough".
But my therapist told me today that he thinks it sounds like I've tried really hard and in proper ways too. I'm just dealing with lowkey shitty people. (He didn't say the last part but I think its true and also his face is kind of expressive so I don't think he'd disagree.)
I've never heard that before though and it feels good? to hear? Part of me knows that even if I was the world's shittiest self-advocate, I wouldn't deserve any of this but hearing that I'm not is still reassuring in a way I didn't know I needed. I'm not absurdly bad at telling people what I need or setting boundaries; people just aren't listening to me.
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neotaissong · 1 month
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Via @fanoniscanon @our.moral.imperative
#accusing internet weasels ignorant strays and twitter fingers of anti blackness is one thing....#but bisan and motaz?!?!?#some of the ig personalities in the diaspora#yes#I’ve seen it for sure and saw it evolve once SA entered the chat with the ICJ...#but to accuse those being eradicated those who we’ve parasocial'd and celebrated and channeled our own fear powerlessness and#inaction thru#that’s a madness#fanoniscanon spits 💯 real talk its difficult to hear but TRUE as my grandmoma says the truth hurts#and that’s not to take away from the anti blackness that I’ve witnessed amongst others - viewing the real time genocide#but genocide is genocide and right is right and that is at the forefront of everything for me and we should be doing more#I was saying this morning I wanna come off apps and take a break due to anti blackness i was witnessing and this post brought me back#i hate the internet but i realised it was bringing back stuff from my first girlfriend first love#she was lebanese jordanian and there was much#antiblackness hovering on the edges of my experience not from her or her fam but the wider community an it still irks me just as it hurts t#think on the hate she got from my community...so yeah#its triggering but love is love is love and i thank god for meeting her#and her educating me on palestine and speaking the fire of first love and seeds of what resistance can be#but going back to this post#fanon is right we are children of the empire and i dont believe motaz or bisan are antiblack#and i do believe we have used them in the same way we use each other on these apps and i know its wrong and i know i have to do better#spreading awareness#protesting etc -- i do not require perfect victims and i also believe oppressed people have the right to resistance#i pray for the liberation of palestine everyday and i pray for those doing everything in their power to attain that liberation#cos theyre not gonna get it thru us attached to our phones but us working together#collectively#us calling out the ops and racists zionists and sexists and actually putting in work that can change something and us also pouring into#our own communities like i really need to doubledown on reading about sudan and congo and use my skillset to educate and liberate#thats something i need to do as i finish my projects#but yeah long story short - we need to check ourselves and our privilege and our parasocial vibes and check anti blackness but not
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caruliaa · 3 months
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personally i dont think karen using ziggs correct pronouns is like proof the chasitys r like so awesome and chill abt trans ppl like . legit feel like they arent like everyones entitled to their opinions on it yk ofc but imo it kinda takes away from the commentary of the harm of fundamentalist xtian views esp when they r canonically homophobic ones and ones clearly based in like. gender roles to act like transphobia isnt part of those harmful views yk but like i do have my own takes on those lines in hatchet town being. number 1 the kindaa boring one lol is that the songs in the show are non diagetic yk so its kinda like when ur telling a story abt ur friend whos nonbinary and like their mom or whoever is transphobic or theyre not out to her nd u have to mention smth their mom said abt them in the story but its not at all relevant to the story tht theyre closeted to her or she doenst respect their identity and like regardless u dont wanna deadname nd misgender ur friend so ur gonna say it like she was using the right name and pronouns assuming ur talking to someone theyre out to right. what im saying is the meta narrative (and also team starkid bc i suspect the real not in universe reason is they didnt wanna misgender both the character and their actor whos actually non binary which is like rly valid nd fair yk like esp in the instance of the simple hatchet town cameo irrelevent to any other hypothetical commentary i think itd feel less like an actual commentary on transphobia and more like. just pointless and somewhat transphobic in an of itself yk) is ziggs friend in this analogy and its not going misgender them even if it is repeating something karen said thank you very much ! and number 2 the less boring one is that ziggs nonbinary swag is so powerful tht the transphobes of hatchetfield dont know how to misgender them so theyre forced to respect their identity bc they dont know how to disrespect it lol
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cosmojjong · 8 months
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good morning i landed back home and i am still in denial like i cannot believe i saw shinee 😭 the trip itself tested my anxiety so many times but seeing them canceled all of my worries in no time
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bluest-planet · 6 months
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NGL fiction really do be impacting reality bc writing Vanitas Streeeeeeetching like this for Miserable made me realize i needed to get outta the hunched over computer Shrimp Position tm
Thank u for ur service [choosing to stay awake and face the horrors] Vani, Ven could never 🫡
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snekdood · 4 months
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i need more friends that i can give the responsibility of perennial native plants and perhaps shrubs and trees to
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waywardsalt · 13 days
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i. get the vibe that the more mainstream zelda fans are allergic to the idea of liking characters who like. do bad things
#the groups and works i avoid are ones that make characters who do generally questionable things into morally good/perfect people#idk. whenever people get nasty or w/s it seems to be when people ask reasonable questions abt the series’ morality#recent example in mind but like. idk. with more personal/petty examples i feel like people will just sand a character down to being nicer#or more decent to fit some mold and maybe while its still similar to canon its a lot less interesting#idk this is just a mini rant ill delete it later. god forbid we enjoy characters who make bad choices and are mean#idk i dont usually leave my little hole but it feels like the worst zelda fans are deep in purity culture regarding characters#and don’t analyze the text beyond what youre told and never going any deeper bc it would require thought and discomfort#idk ig with [character] (cuz i know thisll get picked ul by tag stuff) i just. dont like how he just gets turned into a decent guy?#like hes an asshole but thats it hes more pleasant than anything? its not not canon but its not interesting. its neuters him#yknow? like hes down for robbing people at the bare minimum shut uo about tax fraud he’s a thief literally in the text#im going off the rails. bht i feel like people lash out at characters who are unignorably grating or morally impure#and sand down the ones whose flaws can be ignored. ofc i feel like the main 3 esp with these last few games get the worst of it#and i can get why considering the issues baked into how this series work but it just makes a lot of things boring
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ngl i wrote like half of this one oneshot i have coming up and im still really excited about it but the motivation just disappeared overnight :( like i shit you not it's half written but to connect it i feel like ill have to make all these revisions and its just like. i want to but the adhd says no.
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southern-friedfemme · 2 months
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hm
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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me and my sister went to the mall today and we ran into hot topic so fucking fast it was unbelievable. me and my sister are literal opposites when it comes to fashion. she picked pink, pastel shit like she was trying to be all uwu kawaii meanwhile im just standing here with my arms full of emo and goth shit, i legit felt like daigo and masato with all this emo drip i had walked out with. (p.s. they should put yakuza stuff in hot topic if they havent already because i have yet to have any yakuza related things in my room </3 also hot topic is like the only store i will shop at)
im so sorry to say these words to you but reading this reminded me of my immortal
#snap chats#I ALSO HAVE NO ROOM TO TALK THOUGH CAUSE I LITERALLY JUST GOT BACK FROM HOT TOPIC AND SPENCERSLKEAKVJA#rubbing off my fucking eyeliner as we speak im no better than a goffick and im sure the stuff you got was actually real fire and im jealous#i actually wore my hakuho pin out today- i pinned it on my back jean jacket. not to flex on you or anything 🥴#i remember the day my college friend said something about me being goth and i looked like a dumbass saying 'im not goth...'#when all i ever did was wear black. and tbf i toned it down a LOT while i was at school. i wanted to be normal-passing 😭😭#that aside i only went in to get jewelry and a new belt chain. also a kirby keychain and nail polish#but like it was that Blackheart brand so you know i just wanted it for the skull container and the name. also i was running out#my hot topic really doesnt have any clothes- or at least clothes i fuck with like its mostly skirts and puffy-sleeved shirts#and yeah those are epic and awesome but they're not my style yk. love it on other people just not on me#i usually get my clothes from like. express or skate shops. very different fashions as you can see LMAOOO#like today i got this really pretty crane shirt and then like. i got a black-and-white striped long sleeve with a skeleton hand patch LMAO#UGH im pissed i didnt get the red and black variant too but i didnt think bout it til i already left#i want to get new boots- the ones i have now are great and i love them but i want something chunkier#my 'goth' fashion is really lowkey honestly like i hardly consider myself goth cause of it- its very casual ig#ignore the fuck-you amount of rings i wear ok. theyre pretty..... also they have certain meanings sometimes#like i wear an owl ring cause it reminds me of my sis since she loved owls growing up and went to a uni with an owl mascot#i wear a dragon ring sometimes cause dragons remind me of my dad. for whatever reason.#idk its cause he tried to convince me i was born year of the dragon when i wasnt ?? idk funny guy lmao#and then i already said i wore snake stuff and crosses cause I Hate My Mom. also i was born a snake#also my dads a christian so :] i will wear two cross rings and a cross necklace tyvm love you pops i wish you were around more#uhhh did i want to say anything else. idk im just dumping about my emo bullshit thanks for reading ☠️☠️#if this wasnt my yakuza blog id actually just show the haul i got today BUT i will spare you lot from my emo bullshit#ok ill kill the tags here now im SILLY
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a-wolf-in-bat-wings · 3 months
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Me explaining Anubis' weighing of the heart:
Someone: ok but the Heart is obviously gonna be heavier than a feather, so like [vaguely gestures] V:
Me: y..yes. [literally just stops there].
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Me rn, after like half a year: Why, yes, if we go by "logic" or "common sense". I guess you just accepted with no problem that there are Furry Gods with makeup and clothes doing all this work for the humans half their size in the Afterlife <- sth that inherently has no explanation nor confirmed "logic" either.
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genekies · 3 months
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screaming in the club
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time for another vent in tags
#so i was joking and i thought it came through but im also dumb and autistic and my jokes dont always cross. sO#i was joking about one of my roomates not seeing Nightmare Before Christmas before bc i was showing 2 of them my picture vinyl of it and whe#n one of them said they never saw it i said “but you were a loser on tumblr in the 2010s wdym” and their fiance was just rude to me and i th#ought it was clearly a joke but ig not and they lowley attacked me for it? im just?? i tried to clarify that i was joking and they know im a#utistic. hell the one i was joking to is also autistic but idk so now i feel like utter shit especially after all i did today thst juet drai#ned me. ive been trying to fix our 2nd shower. i had a meeting. i had an extremely hard therapy session. and i showered today. its been hell#like i am trying to get thru relapsing on SH and my ED and ofc they dont know but that shit made it worse and i dont want to say anything bc#then ill feel like im guilt tripping? idk but im also super nervous about a HRT appmt i have coming up and i cant afford it and we have no#food in the house i can eat rn and no one has gone shopping. i cant go shopping either bc i cant drive/dont have a car. and its making it#harder to help get back on track with eating when theres nothing for me to eat? so everything is fucking amazing right now.#the only meals i could POSSIBLY have and all claimed by the one roommate i was joking with. it all takes up half our freezer too so thats#fucking awesome. all this food for one person and none that i can eat or the other vegan in the house can eat. i have been hungry for DAYS.#all there has been for me to eat is cup ramen and grilled cheese. AND SOMEONE WHO WASNT FUCKING VEGAN ATE ALL THE VEGAN CHEESE IM GENUINELY#SO PISSED OFF? like dude yall have your own cheese wtf#the thing is its already really hard for me to tell when i am actually hungry bc of years of ignoring it so when i actually feel it and ther#es nothing it really gets to me. im so tired and idek where my EBT card is to get myself something. its all just so much.#i just want to lay in my bed and sleep for days. but i cant. i have too much shit to do. like even just tomorrow i have to clean the#bathroom. mop the kitchen. do dishes. shovel snow. and just generally take.care of shit because since we have 2 roomates MIA right now and#no one else wanted to do shit i had to step up and i am STRUGGLING. i have been for a while. the thing is everyone that didnt sign up for sh#it didnt have much going on besides probable seasonal depression#i relapsed. have debilitating mental health. i can barely get out of bed before 4 pm. and i have to take care of myself and my cat.#im so close to snapping on them at this point#i need the one roommate i actually like to come back or i swear i will lose my shit. hes only been gone for 6 days but HOLY SHIT#everything has gone to shit#vent over ig im going to sleep soon. still hungry if i cant find something.
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