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foreverxdaydreaming · 2 years
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rainbowbluejay · 10 months
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A five stack of pancakes from IHOP is only 90 calories more than one belgian waffle.
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I know we have IHOP hell for the whole IHOB thing but they're burgers are actually pretty good.
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Really specific Lifesteal SMP citizen memes
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no I'm not a struggling politics/history student why would anyone ever think that
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schoenht · 8 months
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Interdimentional hole of pancakes
WRONG its the interdimensional bowl of pancakes /j
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primmsfairytale · 1 year
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if i had a nickel for every series i liked that features a set of two siblings who each represent real-world brands, i’d have two nickels. which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice
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sivatherium · 1 year
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transbeeduo · 2 years
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Changed how my Tumblr blog looks for the first time in around a year and it actively fought me the entire time thank you Tumblr appearance settings/Sarc
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paisholotus · 6 months
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Meant To Be
Shuri x black reader
Summary: "I'll never leave you again, my love"
Warning Strong Language, Death, Smut.
Translations: Sthandwa(My Love) Ndiyakuthanda ( I Love You) "Ndiyakuthanda, nawe" ( I Love You Too) Ndithathe ukumkanikazi wam ( Take Me My Queen) Umhle kakhulu, Kumkanikazi wam ( You're So Beautiful, My Queen) Shuri ukumkanikazi wam ( Shuri, my Queen) Yintoni eyenzekayo (what's going on) Kukho into ekufuneka uyibone ( there's something you need to see) Kwenzeke ntoni (what's happened) Umntu uhlambe elunxwemeni, uKumkanikazi wam ( someone washed up on the beach , my Queen) Ngaba siyazi ukuba ngubani? ( Do we know who?) Ngu ..... umfazi wakho uKumkanikazi wam ( it is your wife) Umfazi wam ( My Queen) Ukumkanikazi wam omhle ( My beautiful Queen) Uyaphila ( he lives ) Bendikukhumbula, kumkanikazi wam (I missed you, my Queen) Usana lwam ihobe ( My baby dove)
Requested by: @purplecandyocean
A/N: This is inspired by the song Stay Ready & Love Scene by Jhene & Joe. This MF IS LONG! So I'm sorry in advance, but I hope y'all enjoy. 🩵
Narrative
Riri was helping Shuri with a new project, which apparently was to benefit the border tribe. The lab was deafeningly quiet. Riri has been in Wakanda on spring break for a month and will return home in two weeks.
 
She realizes Shuri is acting a little down today; she hasn't spoken anything to her all day. She hasn't pressed Shuri to say anything, but she is becoming concerned.
 
"You ok, bro?" Riri asked Shuri.
Shuri nodded and returned her gaze to the tools on the table. 
Riri nodded hesitantly and gazed down at Shuri's necklace. It was a necklace made of crystal. Riri noted that Shuri always wore it and had never seen her take it off. 
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"What's that necklace? It's almost as if it's shining. Is it made of vibranium?" Riri asked Shuri.
Shuri smiled affectionately as she gazed down at the necklace. She squeezed it in her hand, observing the various hues reflecting off her hand. 
 
"Yeah, something like that." Shuri's voice drifted off. 
Riri interpreted this as Shuri's refusal to talk. Riri took the tools and went back to work. 
 
Shuri returned her attention to Riri, saying, "My wife made it for me." She said quietly.
 
Riri looked at Shuri with a surprised expression on her face.
 
"YOU WERE MARRIED!?" Riri screamed.
Shuri laughed at Riri's shocked face and nodded.
"How come you've never told me?" Riri asked Shuri.
 
Shuri frowned again, rubbing the crystal between her fingers. 
 
"It's difficult for me to talk about her. I could go on and on about my family, but Y/N....it just aches." She said, while holding tears in her eyes and looking at Riri.
 
Riri nodded and expressed regret for bringing it up. Shuri shook her head and stated that she was not bothered. 
 
"I apologize for being so distant today. Because it is my anniversary, I've been missing her even more." Shuri informed Riri.
Riri assured her they didn't have to discuss it any more if she didn't want to. 
 
"No, it's fine. "I'd like to tell you about her." She stated. 
 
"She made this necklace for me. I can communicate with her, and the glowing means she's safe. It will change colors based on her mood. When the blip occurred and everyone else came back, she didn't, including my brother and cousin. The necklace is now basically every color. But the glowing gives me hope that she's still alive." 
Riri's eyes welled up as she listened to Shuri. Shuri basically lost everyone she loved.
"Can you tell me some more stuff about her?" Riri asked. 
Shuri offered her a tearful smile as she glanced at her. 
"Of course." 
"She sounds amazing," Riri said, as Shuri finished telling her about Y/N. "I know, that's why I married her" Shuri proudly said, but her smile quickly faded. "I miss her," She said. Shuri didn't want to burden her problems and worries onto Riri, even though they were friends, talking about Y/N was dreadfully painful.
"Well, even though you can't communicate with her anymore, your necklace still glows. So maybe she'll come back one day. My grandmother used to say, life ain't nothing without faith. So you gotta continue to have faith that she'll come back, good things that are made for us always comes back." Riri told shuri softly grabbing on her hand.
Shuri gave Riri a small smile and quietly thanked her squeezing her hand back. Shuri dropped their hands and told Riri she'll finish the project tomorrow. She told Riri to shut down the lab for her, she was going to call it a night.
As shuri walks down the palace halls, heading to her room, it gets quieter, she thought of the happy days. The day Shuri and Y/N got married. It was in secret, Shuri proposed to Y/N on the beach, it was absolutely beautiful. Shuri was the oldest 16 and Y/N 15. Their marriage was in secret because both of their parents would not of approve of them marrying so young, but their love was strong and Shuri knew she would never want to be with anyone else.
Shuri walked into her room, walking straight into the bathroom to do her nightly hygiene routine. After she was done, she lotioned up and put on her pajamas. She honestly felt mentally tired. She was sick of coming to an empty room night after night. She looked towards her closet and walked in, walking all the way to the back, were Y/N's clothes in boxes.
She opened the box and pulled out one Y/N's shirts, bringing it out of the closet, and walked towards her dresser which held all of Y/N's favorite perfumes. She sprayed the perfume on the shirt and held it up to her nose. She smiled softly at the smelled, the thought of getting rid of your belongings has never and will never cross her mind, this is all she has left of Y/N.
Shuri turns off the lights and gets into bed. She places the shirt over one of the pillows, and hugs it, taking in the scent. Oh, how she wishes Y/N would come back to her. She wishes her whole family back. Of course she has Nakia, her nephew, Okoye, and now Riri.
But, it wasn't the same. She lost everyone. Shuri clutched the pillow tighter as she silently cried herself to sleep.
 
-Time Skip-
Okoye dashed through the corridors of the palace, heading toward Shuri's room.
"Shuri! ukumkanikazi wam!" With tears in her eyes, she let out a cry and pushed open her doors.
 
Startled out of sleep, Shuri gazed at Okoye with a worried expression on her face.
"Yintoni eyenzekayo?" She asked Okoye.
"Kukho into ekufuneka uyibone." She says. 
With the Dora Milaje after them, Okoye and Shuri dashed through the palace's halls and out the palace.
Shuri turned on her suit and dashed over to the scene. The shore. 
Though that was not the case, Shuri mistook it for Namor returning.
 
"Kwenzeke ntoni?" Shuri asked, as Okoye stopped her from walking on the beach.
"Umntu othile wahlamba elunxwemeni." Okoye said, lowly.
Shuri nodded and moved aside only for Okoye to move back in front of her.
Shuri showed her face deactivating her suit, looking at the General suspiciously. "Ngaba siyazi ukuba ngubani?" Shuri asked her.
Okoye opened her mouth but nothing came out, she continued to take uneven breaths looking at Shuri who was losing patience.
Shuri took a good look at the General. Her cheeks was wet and her eyes were red. 'Has she been crying?' Shuri thought. Shuri tried to move around the General but Okoye moved in front of her once again.
"Okoye, you tell me what's going on, right now!" Shuri demanded staring the General in the eyes.
"We know who it is. Ngu ..... umfazi wakho uKumkanikazi wam." Okoye said, slowly her eye's tearing up.
Shuri ran past Okoye instinctively. She was running down the beach like a crazy person when she noticed Ayo and Aneka trying to revive Y/N, who was unconscious on the damp sand. 
 
Shuri slid into the sand close to Y/N's body, placing Y/N's head on her lap. 
 
"LOVE, PLEASE GET UP! DON'T DO THIS!" Shuri begged Y/N. She gazed at the bright red kimoyo beads on your breast, which indicated that it couldn't detect Y/N's pulse. 
 
Shuri removed her necklace and noticed that it had stopped glowing. 
 
 "HAYI! NCEDA UNGAYENZI LE NTO, MNTWANA! BUYELA KUM! ANDINAKUPHULUKANA NAWE!" Shuri screamed. Her hot tears fell on Y/N's face. 
 
The kimoyo beads then became green, prompting Y/N to cough up the water.  
 
Shuri quickly turned Y/N over to her side as she violently coughed up the water. When Y/N finally coughed up the water, Shuri turned her on her back again, pulled her up to her chest, and clutched onto her. 
 
Shuri cried into the side of Y/N's neck, thanking Bast for giving you back to her. Shuri moved her head from Y/N's neck and leaned down, pressing a small kiss to her lips. 
 
"My Queen, maybe we should take her back to the palace so she can get looked at." Okoye said. 
 
Shuri nodded and picked up Y/N, carrying her bridal style back to the palace.
-Time Skip-
Shuri observed Y/N, who was still unconscious, breathing steadily. She leaned over and kissed her forehead, brushing back the dark curls in her eyes. 
 
Shuri couldn't believe she was looking at her wife like this. She was still alive and well. Shuri hadn't seen Y/N in two years, and she was experiencing overwhelming emotions right now.
 
Shuri turned to gaze at Okoye, who was walking over from talking with Ayo. 
 
"How did this happen?" Shuri asked.
 
"A couple said that they saw Y/N wash up on the beach but didn't know who exactly she was until they got people to inform the Dora." She said quietly.
 
"When I got there and I got a good look at her, I knew then that was Y/N." She said, while looking down at Y/N and smiling. 
 
When Shuri turned her head and saw Riri stroll into the room in her pajamas, the moment came to a halt. 
 
"What in the hell is going on? I heard yelling and a lot of running. Did something happen?" She asked, concernedly approaching Shuri.
 
Shuri returned her gaze to her wife with a sweet smile. 
 
"Who's That?" Riri asked. 
 
Shuri returned Riri's gaze with tears in her eyes.
 
"This...is Y/N. Umfazi wam." She remarked, happily beaming. 
 
Riri raised her head at Shuri before returning her gaze to Y/N.
 
'This is her?' Riri pondered. 
"She's beautiful." Riri said.
 
Shuri glanced triumphantly at Y/N and Riri, stating, "Yes, she is. Ukumkanikazi wam omhle." 
 
"AYE!" Everyone turned their heads, and what they saw made their hearts drop. 
 
"Does someone want to fucking tell me why T and I just came out of the fucking ocean?!" 
 
Shuri audibly gasped as she placed her hands over her mouth. 
"N'Jadaka......brother." 
 
Okoye smiled as she stared at T'challa through tears. "Uyaphila." She stated proudly. 
 
Shuri dashed over to Erik and T'challa, wrapping her arms around them both and sobbing.
 
T'challa and Erik clung to Shuri as they sank to the ground. She wailed, clutching them even tighter, as if they might vanish again. 
 
They held onto Shuri while she cried till she couldn't anymore, and the only thing that came out were her hiccups. 
 
T'challa and Erik stepped back to get a better look at Shuri. T'challa had expressed her desire to cut her hair while smiling at her with tears in his eyes. While Erik stated that it suited her.
 
T'challa gazed around, noticing the Dora, Okoye, Y/N on the medical bed, and Riri, whom he didn't know. But who he didn't see was his mother.
 
T'challa returned his gaze to Shuri and asked where their mother was.
 
Shuri's lips quivered as more tears streamed down her cheeks. She started telling them everything. Everything down to the smallest detail. When she returned from the blip, the three of them didn't. 
 
She told them about Namor and what transpired in America, as well as her attempt to bring Riri to Wakanda and her capture by the Talokan. She told them of their mother's death and that M'baku is now King of Wakanda, and she is Queen and Black Panther. 
 
She told them everything that had transpired up until tonight. 
 
T'challa and Erik couldn't find the words to say when she finished. They were experiencing too many emotions at the same time. 
Erik had lost his aunt, and T'challa had lost his mother. M'baku reigns as King on the Thrown. And Shuri T'Challa's younger sister, Queen and Black Panther, has grown up. 
In the last two years, their country has experienced both triumph and tragedy. Erik and T'challa couldn't help but cry as they clutched Shuri. 
T'challa and Erik did express their admiration for Shuri's ability to handle things so well. Shuri thanked her brother and cousin with a warm grin. 
That is everything she has ever desired to hear. 
  -Time Skip-
"Oh my god, Shuri!" Y/N squealed, caught off guard, as Shuri effortlessly lifts her off the ground and twirls her around, cradling Y/N's body in her embrace as she walks down the palace halls. With a playful gesture, she plants several kisses on Y/N's cheek, eliciting another burst of laughter from her. “Shuri, put me down!,” she manage to utter amidst Shuri's genuine laughter, even though her pleads for her to let her go.
“Not a chance, nkoszana. Do you know how long I've waited for this moment?” she tells her sincerely placing her gently back on the ground. Y/N looked shuri in her eye's with love and admiration. After Shuri told Y/N what had happened, she was heartbroken that Shuri had to go through all that. And she felt even more guilty about what happened to Queen Mother. Because maybe if she was there Ramonda would be alive, but Shuri assured her that it wasn't her fault, what happened was out of their control.
Shuri kissed Y/N, trapping her between their bedroom door as her mouth traveled back to that sweet spot on Y/N's neck. Y/N's hand made its way to the back of Shuri's head, gently grasping her soft curls as her passionate kisses, making a moan come from her lips. Shuri's hands creep down Y/N's body, caressing her curves before her fingers slowly find their way between her legs again, causing Y/N's knees to buckle for a split second, from not being touched in so long.
Shuri was delicate in removing Y/N's clothes from her body, allowing her clothes to fall down to her ankles. Her slender fingers graced the sides of her panties, she was not so gentle with, hooking her fingers underneath the lace that hugged Y/N's hips and ripping them, causing a shiver to go down her spine.
"All I want to do right now is love her down (Ooh)
I don't give a damn about who hears the sound (Ooh...)
We'll be in the groove until the sun comes up (Yeah)
Together we'll get lost inside the love"
“Mmm... I smell how wet you are, Sthandwa.” Shuri pressed into Y/N's clit once more, pushing loving circles into her before she made her way down to her clenching hole. Y/N felt drenched, desperate for her wife's touch but Shuri desired to savor this moment as if it were a rare occurrence, shuri was going to please her wife tonight. She's going to make up for the two years she's lost with her love.
"Let's make a love scene, steamy and blue
Erotic memories for an audience of two
And we'll make a love scene, let the foreplay begin
And replay each moment again and again and again"
She traced her fingers over your Y/N's entrance, feeling the way her pussy chased after her in desperation of release. The relentless teasing Shuri subjected Y/N to was unbearable, driving her to the edge of exhaustion as Y/N's impatience mounted, begging Shuri to put an end to it.
"Take it off, take it off, take it off till you get enough
(Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa...)
Anyway that you like, it's okay, come and get my love
(Whoa... oh... ho... ho... yea...)"
Y/N yearned, craving Shuri's touch with a deep hunger, and Shuri desired her wife just as much as she did. For a moment, Shuri got off the bed, allowing herself to become entranced with the way Y/N's slick glistened her inner thighs, doing all this as Shuri unbuttoned her dress shirt and rolled up her sleeves, her Necklace glowing, and her Panther Grillz glistening against her ebony skin. Shuri was so beautiful and the sight of her only heightened Y/N's arousal, her core pulsing beneath Shuri's gaze.
"All I want to do right now is love her down (Love her down)
I don't give a damn about who hears the sound (Hears a sound)
We'll be in the groove until the sun comes up
(Ooh... ooh...)
Together we'll get lost inside the love (Oh, yeah)"
Shuri got on the bed, resting herself on her knees before motioning Y/N to lay on her back and she obliges, spreading her legs, her arms cuffing under her legs. Shuri's fingers lingered above Y/N's clit, grazing them along her folds.
"Let's make a love scene (Make a love scene), steamy and
Blue (Ooh)
Erotic memories for an audience of two
And we'll make a love scene (We'll make a love scene)
Let the foreplay begin (Oh... ho...)
And replay each moment (Mmm) again and again and again
Ooh, I'm gonna keep lovin', I'm gonna keep lovin' you baby
(When the curtain drops) Oh
We won't stop (We won't stop), we won't stop"
Shuri wasted no time sinking her eager fingers through Y/N's folds, Shuri's digits getting lost in her thick, swollen pussy as Y/N feels the coolness of Shuri's rings up against her. She occasionally brushes over Y/N's clit causing her flinch every time, still sensitive from Shuri's lingering touch.
"Baby lyin' on the bed
Exotic fantasies goin' through her head
She's staring at me with those bedroom eyes
(Take four) Honey sippin' on some Chardonnay
The sex is even better when she's feeling that way"
"Are you going to be a good wife, and let me pleasure you?" Shuri asked, in a sultry tone.
Shuri's words make pounding of Y/N's core intensify, aching to be taken care of. Shuri licked a long stripe up her entrance, eliciting a sharp inhale from Y/N as she licked her lips at the taste.
"Tell me what you want, Ukumkanikazi wam?" She asked, kissing her clit.
"Ndithabathe ukumkanikazi wam." Y/N moaned out, pressing Shuri's head closer to her entrance.
That’s all Shuri needed to hear. She lowered her head to the heaven between Y/N's thighs. She swirls her tongue around her clit, moaning as she sucks gently.
"Umhle kakhulu, kumkanikazi wam." Shuri whispered, lapping Y/N's juices as she clenched around Shuri's tongue, feeling her climax approaching.
“Bast!” Y/N cried out, throwing her head back with eyes glued shut.
Any attempt at hiding Y/N's need for Shuri was long gone now. Shuri flicked her tongue rapidly over the sensitive bundle of nerves, admiring the way your legs clamped over her ears as she did.
“Shuri-yam,” Y/N whined, Shuri's name dragging over her lips.
“Yes, my darling?” Shuri mutters, kitten-kissing Y/N's clit. “P-Please, k-keep going.” Y/N begged.
“Fuck! Right there, mama. Don't stop....A-almost there!” Y/N utter, releasing her grip on the sheets and replacing her grasp onto Shuri’s dark curls.
Shuri's name continued to vibrate off the walls when Y/N's release erupted through her vessel, her body shaking as she rode it out.
The queen lapped up Y/N's essence, sucking every drop that threatened to fall from her center as she moaned at the taste. "You did such a good job, my Queen." Shuri praised, leaning up to kiss Y/N's lips, so she could taste herself.
Y/N reaches her hand out to her Queen, "your turn. Let me taste you, Panther-yam."
Shuri straddles Y/N's stomach, moving her wet core back and forth.
Y/N's hand grazes through Shuri's slick folds as Y/ N's mouth waters at the thought of tasting her mama, "My face. Sit on your throne, my Queen." Y/ N insisted.
"Bendikukhumbula, kumkanikazi wam." Shuri moaned, out softly.
Y/N doesn't respond, instead gripping Shuri's hips and bringing her pussy down to within her mouth's reach before going to town. Y/N start by licking a flat stripe up her folds, collecting as much of her essence on her tongue as she possibly can, moaning at Shuri's taste, "You taste so good, Mama." Y/N raised her other hand up and parting Shuri's folds to wrap her lips around her clit and suck.
"Girl, I'm down to take a sip from your cup
If you drink from my fountain of love (Oh, ho)
Girl I'm down to take a sip from your cup (From your cup)
If you drink from my fountain of love
'69 was a very good year (Do you remember, girl)
If you know what I mean, my dear (Ooh, baby)
'69 was a very good year (I could remember)
If you know what I mean, my dear (Let's do it over and
Over again)"
Shuri throws her head back, a loud moan falling from her lips as she begins rocking her lower lips against your face "Bast! Yes, don't stop! Ndiyakuthanda." Moaned loudly, looking down at Y/N
"Let's make a love scene (Let's make a love scene)
Steamy and blue (Let's do it on the floor)
Erotic memories for an audience of two
And we'll make a love scene (Alright)"
"Ndiyakuthanda, nawe" Y/N responded, spitting onto Shuri’s clit. Making Shuri scream Y/N's name.
 -Time Skip-
 "We do not exist in
Any other instant"
“What’s on your mind, sthandwa sam?” Shuri's voice held Sincerity.
Shuri laid on Y/N's chest looking up in her eyes.
"Nothing, I just can't believe everything that has happened in the last two years." Y/N said, looking up at the ceiling.
Shuri turns over, sitting up on her elbows, looking down into Y/N's eyes.
"Sthandwa-Sam. I know you blame yourself, and I'm telling you not too. What happened, what I've been through was not something you could have fixed." Shuri said, pressing her forehead against Y/N's.
"Here in this dimension
You and I are meant to be"
Y/N's eyes watered as she began to cry a little. "Yeah, but you had to do it all alone. I mean yeah you had Nakia and Okoye. But you've waited two whole for me. If didn't come back I would've wanted you to move on. Find someone other than me to make you happy."
"If you just give me 24
Man, all I need is 24 hours
I promise you'll want plenty more
You'll probably be with it forever
So how does it sound, us on the ground
Giving you my love?"
“Ssshhh, Usana lwam ihobe. I was never alone I carried you with me everywhere I went. Prayed to Bast every day that you would come back to me, never giving up hope or faith. And look what happened, you came back to me. On our anniversary at that." She said, smiling down at Y/N. Making her cry even harder.
"Come to me
Come, come to me
what you've done to me
You put a gun to me
Then you brought the sun to me"
"And as for moving on. That's something I could never in my days do. I love your sense of humor, how you’re always laughing and it makes me laugh. Puts a smile to my face when I have no smile to offer. I love your strength and your capability to love even though the world has not been so kind to you."
"Shine like blood diamonds
Learning to have patience only 'cause you are timeless
The universe energy doesn't lie
And this chemistry is infinity at a million times
I wrote a million rhymes describing your star power
And after 24 bars, you get 24 hours"
“You reminded me everyday of what it is to be happy. And I want nothing more than to spend the end my days, waking up to your perfect face every morning. I loved you every second of my life, and that's never going to change." Shuri finished tears sliding down her cheeks.
"There's no place quite like here
There's no better time than now
You gotta stay ready
There's no place quite like here
There's no better time than now
That's why I stay ready"
"I love you Shuri." Y/N said, kissing Shuri's lips.
"We do not exist in
Any other instant
Here in this dimension
You and I are meant to be"
"I love you more, Sthandwa."
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speedron · 2 months
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I don't know why, but I'm here, so...
@totally-bing
@totally-official-yahoo
@totally-microsoft
@the-true-internet-explorer
@the-tumblur-searchbar
@the-real-google
@subway-offical
@speedway-official-unofficial
@realsafari
@official-fedex
@samsung-music-official
@nasa-real
@yahoo-official
@waffle-house-unofficial
@the-official-apple
@im-pandora-i-promise
@the-tumblur-searchbar
@us-costco-official
@burger-king-unofficial
@burgerking-official
@yandex-search-fr
@duothelingo
@tim-hortans-official
@indisputably-ihob
@definitely-wikipedia
@the-one-and-only-duckduckgo
@firefox-official
@youtube-music
@totally-geico
@actually-amazon
@whataburger-unofficial
@definitely-tor-browser-official
@yahooo-official
@undeniably-chevron
@jack-in-the-box-official
@walmart-the-official
@disney-the-official
@totally-mcdonalds
@costa-official
@asda-real
@totally-real-quotev-promise
@the-real-twitter-bird
@x-official
@real-target
@centers-for-disease-control
@the-real-honda
@bonafide-browser-brave
@totally-germany
@operagxreal
@amazon-officialblog
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connor6sex · 1 day
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Baconswag week #1 Secret relationships
There’s one vital part of the Abyss plan that Bacon hasn’t told his teammates. Nor will he ever be telling them. It’s the real reason he’s doing all this.
Really, Bacon doesn’t give a shit about Lifesteal. It doesn’t matter to him if player activity increases. This whole thing is a very absurd and round about type of foreplay. It’s about driving Ash to follow his clues, to find him. It’s a test of wits, because that’s the only thing that either of them get off on.
Mapicc and Zam questioned why they needed this whole puzzle, why they couldn’t just go ahead and start voiding the world waiting for people to notice. And part of Bacon agrees. The void could consume all, and that could be fun for a while.
But whats next once the worlds gone? This cycle is doomed to repeat, so it’s best to enjoy each turn of the wheel. And this time around, Bacon wants to make puzzles; because Ash likes puzzles, and Bacon likes Ash.
And he knows damn well that Ash likes him back. He can read it on the wall, the bulletin board at spawn posting offers and deals. The subtle ways that Ash works his business deals, how his hand reaches across the table for more than a handshake.
Both of them have come away from a few ‘offers’ with far more than they had bargained for. Deals signed with a kiss under the cover of night.
Lets just say there’s a reason that IHOB has been such a successful restaurant, and it’s not just quality product. Having the commissioners favour helps out in a lot of ways.
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lifesteal-headcanons · 7 months
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headcannon that bacon is the papa’s restaurant games equivalent on lifesteal. they gotta eat something right? and farming food is to much work in their busy life’s of betrayal and mass murder, so where do they get their food? bacon has 10+ restaurants all over spawn. i haven’t thought of names yet but a few are ihob (obviously) bacons burgers, and burritos with bacon. they r also cool hangout spots B)
.
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irrealisms · 4 months
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no apple but a heart liner notes
fic here if you haven't read it!
i had the idea of vitalasubz funerary cannibalism pretty immediately after seeing "cannibalism" on the prompt list. it's a good concept. but i wasn't sure if i could get it to the minimum word count (it ended up juuuuust scraping by) so i decided to write the time loop fic first and then do the cannibalism as a bonus if i felt up for it
and then one of my friends (unrelatedly! without knowing about this!) started talking about eclipse fed cannibalism on discord, and i was like Man....i should write eclipse federation cannibalism....unfortunately i only really have enough ideas for One Scene of it.....and they were like write one scene then! and i went You Know What. youre right. and wrote this in one sitting
for research for this fic i read all of @erstwhilesparrow's mcyt cannibalism fics in a row. check those out if you haven't already: double life desertduo(&/)boat boys, limlife mean gills, 3rd life desertduo, new life owen(&/)scott
i knew basically as soon as i had the idea that i wanted to do stuff with the despawn timer. how much can you eat in 5 minutes, when you're grieving and dissociating and in shock, your action spurred on only by the knowledge that whatever you don't eat will disappear forever? that this is the only way to preserve anything at all of the one you love?
in contrast i did not know until literally the day of writing it that i was gonna do something with hearts-as-hearts. it was a good idea, though.
did you know that after subz dies, vitalasy stands without moving or speaking for 50 seconds, turns slightly, and then continues standing there without doing anything or speaking for another 13 seconds. yeah. fun little canon moment. it's also 63 seconds off the 5-minute despawn timer!
the title is from quattrocento by margaret atwood, which is a great poem. idk how well it actually works for this piece thematically, it works okay i think but i'm not doing a ton with serpent imagery here (even though i could! subz and eclipse are in fact totally doing various mythological snake imageries!) or with garden-of-eden stuff? but the imagery always stuck with me when writing cannibalism stuff and i hadn't gotten to use it for a title yet and figured this was my chance
cannibalism as devotion.... cannibalism as memorial...... mm. good stuff. i should have made a way to make this Eucharistic somehow, cannibalism-as-worship doesn't show up here as much but it would've slapped.
something that didn't make it into the fic but that i did have some thoughts about is vitalasy's feelings wrt zam + subz after this. i think he's glad, on some level, that he got to eat subz and zam didn't, but also he feels kind of guilty for feeling glad, but also he's arguing to himself that he shouldn't have to feel guilty, it's not like he stopped zam from being there, zam wasn't there bc zam isn't/wasn't on their team.
other stuff that is even less fic-relevant but that i've been thinking about is that you could do a lot with "if you kill someone you get their heart" + the various meanings cannibalism can have. cannibalism as domination of an opponent. cannibalism as possession. cannibalism as respecting someone's sacrifice. killing someone and then handing them their own heart to eat, when you kill someone and give them back the heart. yeah. fun possibilities!
shoutout to ihob. nothing much to say here other than i'm glad i somehow included ihob in the vitalasubz cannibalism fic. i love ihob. i love that bacon only eats pork chops even though they're worse than golden carrots! he's on three hearts anyway, what's the added saturation gonna do! i love the dumb fucking three-way contract for its ownership. i love. ihob.
fun fact: the only other fic on ao3 tagged with subz's suicide stream is ALSO a vitalasubz funerary cannibalism fic. i genuinely did not know this until after posting. what can i say, it's a good concept.
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Im sosorry for all the questions but do you know which vods n stuff have Ash in them a lot? (Sorry if thats vague, just wanting more Ashswag content, feel free to answer this on priv btw ^^)
Also tumblr doesn't like me following you for some reason lol
Hi again! It’s no problem at all! I adore getting asks and an excuse to run through my collection of things :] as the collection of links might show, I am a HUGE Ash fan, and finding all of these videos is so much fun for me
Zam visits Ash on house arrest and helps him start building the mothership
Redd, Zam, Ash, Rek, and Pangi play blockwars
Squiddo and Ash survive in a natural disaster mod (and do weird Dan and Phil roleplay)
Mapicc starts a resturant (Ash shows up near the middle)
Redd, Ash, 5up, Spoke, and Wifies try to get away with murder (in minecraft)
Bacon and Ash torment an AFK Vitalasy
A whole bunch of people make Peepees and Booger fight (lifesteal S4)
Bacon starts IHOB, Ash is a horrible customer
And then not a video or a vod, but Ash also shows up on an episode of Testrun! (Parrot’s podcast)
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aroaceacacia · 1 year
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im tinhatting. the team awesome hearts are sus.
HEAR ME OUT.
yesterday after the attack on the APO, mapicc rewarded vortex and bacon for their loyalty by handing out enough hearts to get both of them and planetlord to 20 hearts. previously, all three of those players had under 5 hearts, and all of their new heart count has been provided by team awesome. when asked about the source of these hearts, zam claimed to have grinded for them.
... which I don't doubt, but ~50 hearts so casually is A LOT. that's not the amount you can just grind - especially because, iirc, you can only use crafted hearts to add to your heart count if you're below 10? so unless they did some withdrawing and using to strategically make them regular hearts, which sounds annoying, I think something else has gone on.
i think the terrain ban was an inside job.
terrain has been a member of team awesome since day 1. while hes frequently been sort of left behind by mapicc and ro, he has still been considered their ally; mapicc supported him during the snooh riddle conflicts with mcclutch, and terry brought supplies to ro during the destruction of the end.
and then, all of a sudden, you expect me to believe hed just be banned? a screenshot on twitter, and that's it?
yesterday, during the destruction of the APO, team awesome deliberately avoid destroying a few areas (the blurch/new spawn, IHOB, terrain's mansion). after things calm down, terrain joins voice call and things are awfully comfortable and friendly. terrain says he noticed that new people joined the team awesome server - hinting he hadnt been betrayed. the group also briefly discussed terrain's revival (he said hed forgotten which team did it). so why was he banned? things dont add up.
there are two possible scenarios here.
1) after terrain used the infinite hearts glitch, he said that he was made to get rid of the hearts, but specified he'd held onto some, and gave them to mapicc and I think zam as thanks. from what I remember, terrain reported that there were shenanigans that happened and those gift hearts may have been disposed of? I dont recall specifics, but it's not a stretch to think terrain may have had more hearts tucked away - or that the ones hed saved for his friends were hidden somewhere all this time - and that's the source of the huge amount of hearts team awesome was giving away. but if that's the case, why was terrain banned?
2) does anyone remember what happened to leowook when he was banned during zam's medusa execution? someone dropped 5 hearts on the ground, leo had them in his inventory, leo was on 1 heart and got banned. when he died, he dropped his inventory (as is normal) and the players near him pick up 5 withdrawn hearts from his items. hours later, when hes accidentally revived, he comes back with his full inventory - including the 5 hearts.
tl;dr i think team awesome may have banned terrain while he was holding a large sum of hearts in his inventory, so that when they (or someone else) revived him, all of the hearts would be duped.
i could be totally wrong, maybe they did just grind for the hearts and then meticulously drop their own heart counts, use crafted hearts, and withdraw until all of the heart items would be usable for the future members of team awesome. but i dont think that's as compelling as "we asked our friend to be a sacrificial lamb and turned him into an infinite heart fountain for the SECOND time this season"
in short:
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