...and I will love you if you never marry at all, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all. That is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way.
- Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters
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it was just meant to be teasing. dean with his fourth beer in hand with a romcom playing in the background. cas sat next to him on the couch. the characters on the screen were in the middle of a cliche ‘spin the bottle’ game, and dean recklessly decided that would be a good idea; teasing cas about using one of his empty beer bottles to spin and then kissing him because they were the only two in the room. “cmere and kiss me,” dean grinned, bumping cas’ shoulder with his own. cas shook his head, eyes darting away from dean. “cmon, it’s just a kiss. movie magic. doesn’t mean anythin’,” dean teased, nudging cas again. but this time, cas stiffened, shifting away from dean and moving to get off the couch. “and what if it means something to me?” cas said, stilted and closed off. dean froze, eyes darting between cas and the movie and then cas again. then he reached out, hand snagging the sleeve of cas’ trenchcoat. “cmere,” he murmured as he gently tugged cas back down onto the couch, as closely pressed against his side as he could manage. then quieter, softer, “kiss me, cas,” and when cas leaned in, dean closed the gap to press his lips to cas’.
as it turns out, kissing cas wasn’t movie magic… it was just magic.
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Danneel and Jensen Ackles + posing in front of Austin murals
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Trick or treat 🍂
You got Ghost Cas! He didn’t know he had to draw a face on the sheet but he’s trying his best
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I'm loving your latest Dean gifs 🖤🖤🖤🖤
omg??!! thank you!!! 🥺🥰🥰 you’re actually one of my favourite gifmakers and a personal inspiration of mine so i honestly freaked tf out when i read this (and when you followed me back)
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super normal and healthy reaction to killing something that looks like u
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according to all known laws of life
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do you think after cas is gone… after dean loses his chance at a happy ending, he starts writing. at first it’s short angry notes, words written over and over again so sharply the darkness splashes across the page and tears the paper. ‘how dare you’ and ‘how could you do this’ and ‘I hate you for leaving.’ but then, days bleed into weeks and months. and the dark black lines become softer, lighter. ‘what ifs’ start to line the page. dean writes what he would’ve said when he asked cas on a date, a real first date where he would’ve reached out and held cas’ hand and stolen a kiss. he pours words on the pages, night after night. date ideas and places he would’ve taken cas. hundreds and thousand of things they could’ve done together. things that would’ve made cas happy. he crafts what he would’ve wanted to say if he were to get down on one knee and propose to cas. by the time he gets to the end of the journal, he saves the last page for the most important note. his vows. the whole page is filled with all the things he would’ve said. should’ve said. still wants to say. the last line is one he traces over and over again. not with the pencil. no more dark angry lines or ripped pages. instead this one is traced with his ring finger over the words. ‘I love you, cas. I do.’
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