How far did you get? (Patreon)
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Toriel: *trying to fill out legal papers* were you born afab or amab?
Papyrus: Amab!
Frisk: lol nope!
Chara: i just spawned in.
sans: I was a lab experiment!
papyrus: *in the background* WHAT?
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Sans: congratulations father can you die happy now?
Gaster: NOT YET.
Sans: darn
Papyrus: CAN'T YOU TWO JUST... NOT? FOR ONE DAY? PLEASE?
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Gaster: I do know how to cook, I'm not that incompetent.
Sam: *Tell that to your burnt sandwich…
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Incorrect gaster's pearl quote cuz why not-
1-S(sans): why do you even like him!? He's a bitch!
Pearl: Yes! But he's my bitch!
1-S(sans): ...do you even know what that means?
Pearl: No..... BUT STILL-
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Feli: But before I let you in, I gotta know what's in your heart.
Vinnie: I don't have a heart, actually.
Feli: No, like... what makes your blood boil! You know, your guts!
Vinnie: I don't have those either!
Feli: No- okay. What do you want more than anything, Vinnie?
Vinnie: Love and affection!
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Undyne: Gaster isn’t answering my messages.
Sam: *You’ll try then.
Undyne: I’ve tried 6 times, what makes you thi-
Gaster, replying to their message: Hello.
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Gaster: A sprite is anything not static.
Sam: *A sprite is a variable object, be it 2D or 3D.
Flowey: A sprite is a soda, you geeks.
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Sam, talking to Gaster on the phone: *Did he preheat the oven like you told him to?
Gaster: Yes, I did.
Sam: *At what temperature?
Gaster: 535.
Sam: *...That's the clock, Gaster.
Gaster: ...
Sam: *...
Gaster: ...536.
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Gaster: Did you...just hot glue your phone to the ceiling?
Sam: *Yep! You’re recording stuff. But it’s alright, the case is on!
Sam: *You can just take the phone out of that, and the case stays there!
Gaster: Sam...I don’t see a case...
Sam: *What does he mean? It’s right th-oh.
Gaster: ...
Sam: *...
Sam: *He doesn’t need the ceiling, right?
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Sam: *Someone tried to kill you again today.
Gaster: ...A-Again?
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Flowey: What is this!?
Sam: *That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away.
Flowey: Ow! Make it stop!
Sam: *Surrender to the kindness, Flowey. It’s nice to be nice.
Flowey: Your guilt is strong...But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!
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Sam: *You need more help...Maybe you should call your friends.
Undyne: ...Your what?
Sam: *Your friends.
Alphys: A-Are they saying “friends”?
Gaster: I think they're being sarcastic.
Flowey: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night...
Flowey: Hey, Sam! All of your friends are in this room!
Sam: *You have other friends!
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Sam: *Is he sure this is the right direction?
Flowey: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!
Gaster: In that case, we're definitely lost...
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