Aline: So, Alec, there's a rumour going around that you're dating Magnus Bane.
Alec: Rumour?
Alec: Are you telling me some people doubt it?
Aline: Where are you going?
Alec: I need to fix this. There shouldn't be any doubt.
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Clary: Jace would throw himself in front of a car for you.
Alec: Jace would throw himself in front of a car just for fun.
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Magnus: Blueberry, what did you learn today in your class with uncle Ragnor?
Max: If things get bad, you can always fake your own death for a few years until the dust calms down.
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Magnus: Guys, seriously don't do paintball as a double date. It's a bad bonding activity and some people are too good at it.
Lily: I don't know what you're talking about, Mark and I are best friends now.
Magnus: That's because you two just gooffed off in the woods while I was being hunted for sport by my boyfriend.
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*after Malec break-up*
Jace: Hey, I am going to the store, do you want anything?
Alec, in tears: Magnus...
Jace, turning his pockets inside out: Dude, I have like... 5 dollars.
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tessa: and if jem told you to jump off a cliff would you do it?
will: [looks at jem]
jem: [shakes his head]
will: no, i would not
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It took five years and everyone banging their heads against a wall for him and Simon to get together
Text is from a fuckin quora video I watched that place is wild
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Jace Herondale: I’ve been here in jail so long I think I’ve lost my mind.
Jace Herondale: The days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months.
Jace Herondale: How long have I been in here now? Almost a year?
Clary Fairchild: …….
Simon Lewis: (Done with Jace’s bs) This is Monopoly.
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magnus, holding up a snake: found this baby outside! what do we name him?
jace: what the fUCK—
alec: william snakespeare.
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Magnus: You can stay.
Alec: Cool.
Magnus: But your clothes must go.
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trying to explain parabtai to clary in 1.03
jace about alec: if i murdered someone, he’s the person i’d call to help me drag the corpse across the institute floor. he’s my person.
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Magnus: I want to wake up next to you every day for the rest of our lives.
Alec: I wake up at 4:30 am.
Magnus: …
Magnus: I want to see you every day for the rest of our lives.
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Magnus, dramatically flopping onto Alec’s lap: Baby, tell me I’m pretty.
Alec, smiling lovingly: You’re pretty fucking annoying is what you are.
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Alec: Jace, you can't told my children that the solution for their problems is to cry dramatically in the shower or in the rain and then go out to kill something.
Jace: why not?
Magnus: *to himself* Oh, Herondales...
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Jace: Anyone else have a weird urge to lecture themselves.
Jace, as Alec: Jace, what are you doing?
Alec, appearing behind Jace: Jace, what are you doing?
Jace: I conjured him.
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Magnus: Why are you burning our marriage certificate!?
Alec: Good luck trying to return me without a receipt.
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