#its always fun to see posts made in 20 seconds gain more attention

[chibigaia-art]

The worm string thing is the funniest shit I've seen all day and I thank you

thank you guys lmao

#its always fun to see posts made in 20 seconds gain more attention #but yeah that shit is funny #i didnt mean for it to be thAT funny but i guess comedy works in mysterious ways #chibiblabbing #Anonymous

[otp-holic]

The one place (where something happened) (A03)

“In your life there are a few places, or maybe only the one place, where something happened, and then there are all the other places.” Alice Munro. (or the one where they receive a letter from a familiar name and we go into 4Ks of fluff around a lost afternoon in France)

4K. Lamely explicit at one point. Fanfic + Pictures Inside. Trigger for FLUFF as the main plot. Part of the Never let us lose what we have gained series (AO3)

This was supposed to be a manip with 200 words of bantering and it's now 4Ks of fluff with a few pictures. I've decided to leave them inside the cut because I feel they work better with its context there. I'm sorry for the hassle, but I really hope you give this a chance... unless you have cavities, only like fics with amazing plots or are allergic to shameless fluff.

Please do not repost the pictures, I know this is futile, but… I try :)

DAGUERROTYPE, France 1944 Private Collection.

Steve is cooling down from his very early run, enjoying the feeling of the pink sunrise looming over the awakening Brooklyn streets as he walks the last couple of blocks on the way home, when his phone beeps.

“Check your actual mailbox, we dropped something for you there. I think you should appreciate us making it old-fashioned just for you, grandpas!”

Steve smiles at Sam’s text and as soon as he arrives at their building he snaps a picture of the very common and flat envelope with “Barnes&Rogers” scribbled on top of a Stark Logo, to send along his response.

“Nice try, but this is inaccurate. A letter would have never made its way to us without an address or stamp. We’ll send you a proper thank you card to show you how it’s done.”

He can’t help but chuckle at his own joke rereading the text while he opens the door, and when he looks up from his phone and into the kitchen, he is received by a sleepy Bucky looking at the coffee machine like he looks at Steve during their most soft and embarrassingly cheesy moments.

“You love that thing more than you love me, confess it.”

“In the mornings? Yes. I don’t even like you in the mornings most of the time,” he answers matter of factly. “Want some?”

Steve playfully wiggles an eyebrow.

“No way. Your sweaty self is tempting, but coffee smells better. I might join you in the shower later.” Bucky offers him one of the two cups he has poured and he notices the envelope Steve is holding. “What is that?”

“We’ve got mail!” He hands it to Bucky. “I have no idea what's on it, but Sam texted me to say they had something delivered to our mailbox and there it was. Open it.”

Bucky leaves the cup on the counter, face sparked with a curiosity that makes him look twenty-one (and Steve weak on the knees), and goes for it.

The content is a bit underwhelming at first glance: Another envelope, white, no Stark logo, but topped with a bright green post-it with a note on Pepper’s script.

“This got to me via PR. We analyzed it and checked with the source (no peeking, I swear) and it seems legit. With that return address, it’s likely to arouse your interest. Love, P.”

Bucky tears off the post-it and the letter is revealed to be addressed to Steve Rogers at the Stark Tower, but it is when they turn it around when everything goes still for a second.

The return address is some street in Marseille, but what has Steve’s mouth dry and Bucky’s hand trembling just a bit is the combination of the place and the name written on top: Emmanuelle Jaques Dernier.

“Boom?”, Bucky says, trying to cut through their heavy hearts and taking Steve’s hand. It’s a terrible terrible joke, but Dernier would have loved it and he grins.

“That’s a terrible terrible joke,” Steve verbalizes, “but I think at least we’ve reached the same conclusion.”

“Elementary, my dear Steve,” Bucky answers as he opens the second envelope, only to reveal a folded letter and yet another envelope. “It’s a fucking vault of paper!”

Steve takes the letter from him, unfolds it, and quickly scans it (normal office paper, printed, hand-signed) before he starts reading it out loud to Bucky’s undivided attention.

“Dear Mr. Rogers,

My name is Emmanuelle Dernier and I am the great-grandson of Jaques Dernier of the Howling Commandos.

First, let me tell you that we all in our family grew up with amazing stories and praise for you, Sergeant Barnes, and the rest of the team. I never got to meet my great-grandfather or any of them (you), but I’ve always felt like I did.

In fact, that’s the ultimate reason behind this letter: I ached to honor him and I’ve been putting in order all his remaining letters, pictures, and memories so they don’t get lost forever, and there are many things I’m discovering through this journey. So many pictures and tiny details… and amongst them, you and the rest of the Commandos appear at the most random and memorable moments. Nothing that’s going to make it into history books, more like the stories my grandpa used to share with us over and over again, those important tidbits that make him more human.

Anyway, I was going through the pictures he kept when I came across some war photos that didn’t seem to match the 40s timeframe. Typical daguerreotypes from the 20s in a very bad state, probably taken with a camera from the era in 1944 and developed on a later date by somebody who clearly didn’t master the technique.

They were in a very bad state and hidden inside an envelope that said “Terribly drunk soldiers in France making idiots of ourselves in unique and creative ways. Fun evening, horrible hangover. About 20 miles west of the Maginot Line. Autumn ‘44”. I’m attaching a photocopy of that, I hope you can understand my decision to keep the original.

After restoring the daguerreotypes with some experts, all I got were five very bad pictures with silhouettes of people apparently having fun…. but there was one that got a lot better in the cleaning process that feels important somehow. I’m sending the original, as well as the restored version I got.

I, of course, don’t have the whole context, but I hope it brings back a good memory. My great-grandpa might be in the picture, but I don’t think this one belongs to my family or to a museum.

Thank you for your service, I really hope this letter finds its way to you.

E.Dernier.”

“I can’t believe… Steve, most days I’m convinced that day and that place are a figment of my imagination,” Bucky smiles, remembering. “When I think of a moment of pure joy during the war, I think about that afternoon in France, and it always feels unreal. A bubble of air and laughter while we were so surrounded by death.”

Steve nods, reminiscing about that warm and humid September morning when they arrived at yet another abandoned and destroyed little village, this one about twenty miles west of the Maginot Line. They had orders to lie low and wait for twenty-four hours before they started the maneuver to wipe another Hydra base off the map, and that little town was perfect for that.

Among bomb debris and fallen walls, they found one small building miraculously standing next to the remains of the church, so they decided to set camp under a roof for a change since the weather was being a little flickery with the rain, and they had the rare luxury of time.

The inside of the tiny house was as unusual as the outside: nothing was destroyed beyond being dusty and worn by time, and everything they found (furniture, kitchenware, and even fabrics) belonged more to Steve and Bucky’s early childhoods than to 1944, a living museum frozen in time.

Only it was not a museum, but the parish house left untouched and non-raided: old-fashioned clothes, outdated church books, yellowing clergy collars, and, of course, the wine cellar. Oh, that wine cellar… the havoc it unleashed.

“I remember the absolute excitement when Falsworth found all those bottles of old unscathed mass wine from the parish,” Steve brings his memory to words, looking at Bucky, “I’m still a little convinced that we are going to hell for drinking them.”

“Not for that, probably, but it was a wonder nobody died on the spot of wine poisoning, it tasted like sweet vinegar, ugh.”

“But it did his part, right? Took our minds off things; got us drunk, bold and silly.” Steve answers.

“Apparently not all of us,” Bucky says very seriously, looking at Steve.

“Technicalities… I got drunk by proxy. Seeing you all so happy made me giddy and tipsy, too.”

“I came and went… I remember being a little surprised at the clarity of my thoughts at some moments there when some of the guys were basically drooling on the floor. Now I understand, of course.”

Steve squeezes his hand, not much to be said there.

They were already way too drunk by the early afternoon, drinking to the sound of a sudden rainstorm pouring outside. All of them scattered across the small dusty living room and its adjoining kitchen while they went through all the bottles of wine they had been able to find. Cheering for the foregone priest every time somebody raised a glass, and laughing as if there were no ruins or war on the other side; just silly men (boys, really) laughing their hearts out.

“Earth to Steve… I don’t know about you, but I’m dying to see what the hell that envelope is hiding. Especially now that we know about its time stamp.”

“I’m sorry, me too! Gabe drunkenly handling that old camera and those glass plaques the way he did? I’m honestly impressed that he was able to take any pictures at all,” he muses. “Shit, is it weird that I’m nervous?”

“I’m gonna save us the bantering because I’m nervous, too,” Bucky answers in all sincerity. “Truth is, Steve, I remember everything about that day.”

It’s a new admission, a newly opened door for them because for some reason, they have never talked about that peaceful surreal afternoon, and Steve nods in recognition as he silently goes for the envelope one-handed, not wanting to let go of Bucky’s hand because his surface is way cooler than his wrenching insides. Maybe the picture is an overexposed french wall but maybe…

The photo he extracts from the envelope is clearly the original and damaged one Emmanuelle specified in his letter. Anybody else looking at it would see nothing beyond Dernier’s blurry profile, but since Steve and Bucky were there when this was taken, they know exactly what moment Steve is holding in his hand.

“Buck,…” is all Steve can say, struck by the blurry keepsake.

Later in the afternoon when they had already consumed most of the wine and there was not a single coherent thought left in the room, one of the guys took the parish books and besottedly announced that there was a wedding set for today… thirty years ago. Alcohol fueled a goofy idea that escalated at the speed of light, with Morita saying they were going to a wedding because they deserved a celebration, Dernier confessing that he had once considered becoming a priest, and Dum-dum bringing out all the old fashioned clothes from the wardrobe and deciding they were getting nice and clean for the festivities.

“That’s clearly Dernier in the picture killing it in his priest role, right?” Bucky says, half smiling and interrupting Steve’s thoughts. “You know, I went all-in with that fake wedding party. I was laughing to tears when I saw you put on that ridiculously long and ill-fitting jacket from the 10s, feeling weightless and silly for the first time since sailing off, and God knows we all deserved that. And it was all safe and light-hearted until fucking Morita decided you had to be the groom, and...”

“Were you jealous because I won the dashing groom competition?”

Steve’s attempt at a joke is weak, but there’s truth behind it: Morita chose Steve as the groom (“Cap, you are the most dashing and the least drunk”) to a chorus of excited voices cheering for him. Somebody else, most likely Dum-Dum, chose the rest of the roles (Sarge, best man duty; Jones, camera; Morita, keep the wine flowing; the rest of you, misbehave!) and in the blink of an eye, they were all going outside laughing under a light rain, and about to celebrate Steve’s fictional wedding to nobody.

“How could I be jealous?” Bucky cuts in. “Do you remember all you said to me that afternoon? During World War II and in front of a battalion of men?”

“I was drunk.”

“Fuck you!” Bucky disentangles his hand from Steve’s to use both of them to hold Steve’s face and kiss him with violence. “Tell me. Do you remember what you said?”

As if he could ever forget. He can recall every step he took from the house to the makeshift wedding spot amidst the trees where his best man (looking dapper even in that ludicrous jacket) was laughing along Dernier. He can still smell the petrichor, can still sense the blush coloring his cheeks while hoping nobody noticed and can still hear the beating of his heart when Bucky handed him a battered umbrella (“You don’t deserve to get rained on your wedding day, punk”) and a fucking ring made out his shoelaces (“You’ll have to buy something a little more permanent.”). And then…

“Dernier started the ceremony and he wanted to know if I had somebody in mind and I said ‘of course’.” He replays, his voice barely a whisper. “I said I’d had my eyes on a brown-haired Brooklynite since before I could remember. I said that I was pretty sure those blue eyes were set on mine too and that hopefully those eyes would be set enough to want to marry me even if I had never dared to ask.”

He’s been holding Bucky’s gaze the whole time, and he’s far from over yet, but he needs to fucking breathe before he goes on. Neither of them has moved a muscle for the past minute.

“Then he asked me to repeat the wedding vows after him and…”

“And you said Buck, right?”, Bucky interrupts, voice winded. “You fucking whispered I take you, Buck, as my lawful wedded husband till the end of the line. I heard, Steve. Even if the rest of the world didn’t, I did. But you never said anything, so I always deemed it impossible, a product of the corniest nook of my mind trying to outweigh all those bad things, because not even you could be as bold, reckless, and mushy as to do that,…it’s my fucking fault, I should have known better!”

“Not completely reckless, pal. I was scared shitless as I said those words, but what else could I do? You were right by my side about to put a ring on my finger as my “best man”, everyone, including you, supposedly drunk past recollection, and everybody else too far away to hear my whispers. It was such an easy choice in the end because truth should always win over fear. And those vows were. The truth.”

“You have always been too honest for your own good, Rogers,” Bucky is breathless and exasperated and goes for his mouth again, bringing in all he (they) couldn’t in 1944. “You destroyed me, Steve. My knees were as weak as a teenager’s in front of his first crush. I wanted to kiss you so badly when I heard you say all that there in the open… and I couldn’t even acknowledge it.”

“I know. And for what it's worth, I really thought you didn’t remember.”

It is too much. Is it normal to feel this much? Steve would blame it on the serum enhancements, but he was already overwhelmed at 16, so that’s clearly not the answer.

He craves, no, he needs touching, grounding, closer. Bucky. There’s too much space between them even if they are back to kissing like they would have that day in 44, and at any other time if their own lives wouldn’t have stolen those moments from them.

“It happened.” Bucky whimpers, biting on Steve’s lip who abandons his own stool to straddle him, both of them gasping in sync at the feeling of their cocks, hard against each other’s through their soft pants.

Bucky soon ups the stakes by carding his metal hand through Steve’s hair pulling his head backwards to help himself into that spot on his neck.

“Same two moles as when you were tiny, as when we were at that war... Your cute vampire bite. Favorite spot.” He licks on them with the tip of his tongue. Steve growls on cue and Bucky giggles. “Favorite chain reaction.”

“Buck, you cheater, you know what that does to me!” Steve cries out followed by Bucky’s evil chuckle.”Bed, couch, countertop,…I don’t care, but naked. Now. Stained pants due to heavy petting are too much of a trip down memory lane for me. Let me keep a bit of my dignity.”

Steve stands up liberating Bucky from his grip but aching at the loss of contact.

They are naked and making out in the middle of the kitchen in no time; Bucky steadily pushing him against the refrigerator while fiercely grinding against his crotch.

“Hey, ‘teve,” Bucky pants. “The way this is going, it’s my dignity now that's at risk. I don’t think I can make it further than the floor before I come.”

Steve groans into his mouth just at the thought and they start sliding to the floor the best they can until he’s a human blanket moving over Bucky. With no lube at hand, and no time, that’s their best option.

They kiss and kiss and kiss, his hands not leaving Bucky’s sweaty hair. Bucky’s hands on his ass, forcing their groins closer with one while he (almost absently) plays around his hole with the other, driving Steve crazy in the process. Dicks left to do their own thing through pressure and friction. Everything is working. And fast.

“Oh, fuck!” Bucky exclaims “Can you promise me all this stuff with the letter was real and not a long-con plan to assure your fragile masculinity that I love you more than I love that espresso machine?”

That. That silly unfunny excuse of a joke that screams Bucky all over is what pushes Steve all the way over the edge. He fucking laughs as he comes making absolutely embarrassing sounds, pressing their foreheads and noses together until it hurts, and shaking from head to toe without stoping his pressure on the stupid and smug man under him. His lover. His partner. His unofficial husband. His best friend.

His Buck.

“There’s still too much blood in your brain if you can play that dirty,” Steve states, placing one hand between them grabbing Bucky’s hard cock. “Let’s see if I can do anything about it.”

“Your hand, usually so helpful, but I was already following you after that sound you make when you come and laugh at the same time, shit, it always goes straight to my dick, I’m,…” he keeps talking with difficulty between breaths and moans until he leaves his speech unfinished coming all over Steve’s fist.

They kiss on the lips breathing into each other before Steve rolls over. They are sticky and panting in silence, spread on their kitchen’s floor, Steve’s shoulders crushed between Bucky’s and the dishwasher. Domestic bliss at its most literal.

One lavish fuck and two showers later they reemerge into the kitchen in search of something to eat: Bucky is in charge of the food today, while Steve cleans the mess they left a couple of hours ago.

He’s decluttering the counter when their damaged picture laying there puts a smile on his face but also reminds him of the restored version presumably still waiting inside the disregarded letter, so he grabs the envelope to retrieve its contents: one photocopy (from Dernier’s original writing), and the promised photo.

And it is restored. Everything is clear where it was blurry before: Dernier (so deep into his priest impersonation that he’s not even looking at them), the trees, the battered umbrella, the ridiculous jackets… and them.

“You had the nerve to call me reckless and mushy, Buck?” Steve laughs as he stares at the picture where a very young Bucky is about to put a ring on his finger with the least subtle lovestruck expression he’s ever seen (“and it’s for you”, his brain proudly reminds him) “Wow, you might as well be kissing me there, anything would be more subtle than this!”

“Don’t shame me, you punk, especially not when you were the one responsible for breaking my brain back then!” Bucky answers coming from behind and stealing the picture from his hands to scrutinize it. Goofy grin and raging blush quickly taking over his face. “But you’re one to talk, Cap. You are gazing at that shoelace’s ring as if I were handing you a diamond tiara!”

Steve laughs softly at that and moves his right hand to his pocket, feeling the weight of the little compass he had retrieved earlier from one of his drawers. He used to carry it with him everywhere for comfort, but he has a better option now.

“Didn't you know that shoelaces are forever?” He asks, taking the compass out of his pocket and holding it in both hands as he opens it, nudging Bucky with his elbow to get his attention.

Bucky is confused for an instant while he looks at his young face staring at them from inside the little box. Of course he knew that (he made fun of Steve for days and days) but Steve detects the change in his expression when he notices the other thing.

“Wow, you gigantic sap,” Bucky says, taking the compass out of his hands to double-check he is seeing what he thinks he’s seeing. “You saved my shoelace.”

He had. While they were all celebrating his wedding under the rain dancing to no music, he quietly slipped the little string off his finger and tied it to the most secure place he had back then.

“It’s not a shoelace, you jerk, it’s a symbol. A declaration.” He laughs, stealing the compass back to safely pocket it again.

“You are delusional,” Bucky snorts, kissing the top of his head. But he’s widely smiling and lost in thought as he goes back to their sandwiches.

Steve stays on the spot enjoying the peace in their silent companionship, his focus on the latest news showing up on his phone, the text he’s writing to Sam and the comforting sounds of Bucky moving around the kitchen.

“You might have married me, but I never actually married you.” Bucky blurts out of the blue a bit later, sitting by his side as he hands him a plate with a sandwich and some grilled greens on it. “Do you want mayo with that?”

“Uh?” Steve forgets all about the news and the text and looks at Bucky in confusion.

“Mayo, do you want some?” Bucky repeats nonchalantly.

“No mayo, thank you; but I was actually more interested in the other part, you know, that thing about marriage?”

Bucky looks him in the eye: earnest, blushing and with the same look of smug adoration he had on the picture.

“Oh, that part.” He jokes. “You apparently married me in 1944, but I never married you back. And I would like to.”

“Marry me?” Steve asks and Bucky visibly nods.

“I’m sorry for throwing the idea at you like this, books tell me I'm supposed to have candles, music, and a ring, but you showed me that restored picture and I couldn't stop thinking about it, about proof,” Bucky speaks uncharacteristically slow and very softly, voice trembling here and there while he claps his hand with Steve’s finger by finger for reassurance and as a distraction. “A single photo had the power to transform a moment that existed just as a made-up happy place inside my mind into something tangible and real. Something that would be tangible and real for anybody getting a hold on it and looking at our stupid faces.”

“So stealthy,” Steve says, and they both laugh together.

“Proof, Steve. I was slicing tomatoes and thinking how there’s so much evidence, thousands of files! out there proving that all the stuff that fuels my nightmares were real, but nothing solid about this. Us.” Bucky stops for a moment collecting his thoughts, still smiling even with the heavy subject he just dropped into the mix. “Sorry, I believe I put more time into these sandwiches than into thinking this all the way through so I’m…”

“Take your time, we’ve gone from mayo to marriage to nightmares in five minutes so don’t worry, you have me hooked here.”

Steve makes Bucky laugh again as he intended, and he feels their calloused laced fingers immediately squeezing closer.

“It’s stupid because it doesn’t change anything for us but,.. I don’t fucking know, Steve, I think that picture has messed up with my mind! I instantly found comfort in the idea of people finding facts beyond the nightmares now or in the future. An easy to understand, universal and oversimplified proof of how much I loved you and how much I was loved in return.” Bucky takes a breath and stares at him sporting a million-watt smile. “Marrying you,… I would really love that. And for real this time.”

“Ok, Buck.” Steve instantly replies, eagerness winning over thoughtful and heartfelt declarations. He tightens the grip on their joined hands to drive them to his lips and seals the easiest answer he’s ever had to give.

And it's done!Sorry for the cavities, for going on with the fic when it should have ended and for ending it where it might have had to keep going. It was painful and fun. I'm free!

#stucky #steve and bucky #fanfiction forever #painfully created by me #fic by yours truly #manip by yours truly #pics by yours truly #howling commandos #never let us lose what we have gained #fluff #so much fluff #sorry for the cavities #this was fun and painful #pictures inside #please do not repost the pictures #shameless fluff #no artistic value #but they deserve to be happy #long post #under a cut #yay its done #sorry because it ends 15 times #shoelaces are now part of my canon

[hellyeahheroes]

Building America Chavez in D&D 5e

Sorry I’ve been mostly quiet, but certain recent events made me wish to take a break from posting. I do feel bad I didn’t do more for a Pride Month, however so I thought of doing something that will let me combine both trying to lift my spirits up (especially since I haven’t done one of those in a while) and doing little fun thing for LGBTQ followers - letting them play a game that is known as a good escapist fantasy as one of our favorite characters. We’re building America Chavez today.

First of all, let’s define Goals for this build. First of all, we need to kick and punch hard and be able to take a hit as well and be super fast. Second, we need to kick so hard to open portals to other dimensions. Finally, we need to be able to fly and shine bright light.

Regarding Ability Scores America is one of those characters who should have 20 in everything, but we cannot really do that so I’m gonna prioritize what we need for the build. As always I’m taking basic template from Tulok the Barbarian so we’ll be unig Standard Point Array (15, 14, 13, 12, 10 and 8). If you want to roll or use point-buy, go ahead and use these as guidelines, just remember you’ll need 13 inWisdom and Dexterity for multiclassing.

Strength: 14, You can throw tanks at the moon

Dexterity: 13, we need it for multiclassing purpose. Also, I doubt any medium or heavy armor goes with short shorts, America’s outfits are light armor at best.

Constitution: 15, you can take hits from the likes of She-Hulk, Vision and Thanos

Intelligence: 10, you don’t need it but America did go to college to expand her knowledge of cosmic stuff.

Wisdom: 12, living on your own since being a child means picking up some survival skills.

Charisma: 8, low but we will bumb it with rracial ability scores.

Speaking of Race, America is from another planet, descendant of a race created by two celestial beings, who can fly and shine her star marks. and if that doesn’t speak Protector Aasimar, I do not know what does. You gain +2 to Charisma and +1 to Wisdom, resistance to necrotic and radiant damage and know Common and Celestial languages. Your Darkvision lets you see  60 feet in dim light as in normal light and in darkness as in dim light, but without abilitty to discern colors. Once per long rest you can heal a person (or yourself) for number of hit points equal your level. Finally, you get a Light Cantrip, which lets you make one object no larger in any dimension than 10 feet and make it shine bright light in a 20 feet radius and dim light in next 20 feet. Use it for your own stars.

Background: You are from another planet in another dimension so Far Traveller is closest to that. You gain proficiency in any language of your choice, pick something campaign relevant. You get proficiency in Insight and Perception and a single musical instrument or gaming set of your choice. You have an All Eyes On You feature, which makes you a center of attention and opens you doors of curious nobles and scholars.

Class Features:

Level 1: We will kick things off as a Ranger.  You gain proficiency in Dexterity and Strength saving throws, light and medium armor, simple and martial weapons, shields and two skills, choose Athletics and Investigation. 

We will be using Ranger options from Class Variants Unearthed Arcana, which is free. Deft Explorer lets you pick one of 3 options - Tireless lets you a number of times equal your Wisdom modifier per long rest gain 1d10+ Your Wisdom modifier temporary hit points as an action. If you are suffering from Exhaustion and take a short rest, you lose a level of it.

Favored Fore lets you cast Hunter’s Mark on a target without expending a spell slot a number of times equal your Wisdom modifier and don’t need concentration to maintain it. Hunter’s Mark let’s you pick one target and for its duration (up to an hour) you deal 1d6 extra damage whenever you hit it with an attack and gain advanate on Survival and Perception checks to find it. And if the target drops to zero hit points before spell ends you can move it to another as a bonus action. So if you are chasing after Loki again, this will come in handy.

Level 2: 2nd Level Ranger gets to pick a Fighting Style. Unarmed Fighting lets your unarmed attacks deal 1d6+your Strength modifier damage, 1d8 if you hit with two hands at once (or do a dropkick, I guess) and when you start a grapple and whenever you hit a grappled creature you can deal it extra 1d4 bludgeoning of damage. As with Tulok, we pick this one a lot because a lot of superheroes just use fists. If you feel YOUR America should be swinging a waraxe, go for it and pick something else.

On this level Rangers get spellcasting. you know a number of spells and cannot know spells of higher level than you have spell slots for, whenever you cast a spell you spend spell slot of appriopriate level or higher. If a spell requires a saving throw it is against difficulty of 8 + Your Proficiency Modifier + Your Wisdom modifier and the latter two you also sum up to add to a Spell Attack roll if a spell requires one. You start with two spells.

Cure Wounds lets you touch a creature or yourself and heal for 1d8+ Your Wisdom modifier of hit points.

Zephyr Strike lasts for a 1 minute on concentration and for this time you don’t provoke opportunitty attacks and when you deal your first attack you get to make it with an advantage and your speed increases by 30 feet for this turn.

Level 3: Once you reach this level Protector Aasimar gains Radiant Soul, letting you once per long rest radiate with positive energy, even spouting mings made of light from your back. If your DM allows you can probably gain the benefits without that visual add-on. This form lasts for one minute and gives you flying speed equal your regular speed and once on each of your turns you can deal extra radiant damage equal your level to a creature you hit with an attack or a spell.

3rd Level Ranger gets to choose a Ranger Conclave. Horizon Walker specializes in dimensional travel and interdimensional threats. You can as an action sense location of a nearest interdimensional portal once per short or long rest. You also become a Planar Warrior, which means you can use your bonus action to select one creature you can see within 30 feet of you. During this turn when you attack that creature you not only deal extra 1d8 damage but also all damage from that attack gets converted to force damage. Force is the least protected against type of damage in the game, there is literally a single creature immune to it and zero creatures with resistance to it in entire Monster Manual.

At this level Ranger also gains Primeval Awareness, letting you spend a spell slot to be able to sense all aberrations, celestials, dragons, elementals, fey, fiends, and undead within one mile from you for duration of 1 minute per spell slot’s level, but does not tell you their exact location or number. It is horribly situational, costs your valuable resource and is basically a shittier version of Divine Sense, an abilitty Paladin gets on first level. It’s actually a core Ranger abilitty and it does have a replacement in Unearthed Arcana.... buuut that replacement gives you a bunch of extra spells that aren’t really America’s style. At least I am far more likely to beleive she is able to pick subtle hints of presence of various creatures due to her years of experience fighting everything the Multiverse threw at her, than I am that she can detect and talk to animals and plants or be able to see through an animal’s eyes. If you want to sacrifice some thematic coherence for more powerful build, be my guest.

Hunter’s Mark is now added to your spells’ known as a bonus from Favored Foe and Horizon Walker gives you another additional spell - Protection From Evil and Good, letting you make  aberrations, celestials, elementals, fey, fiends, and undead  have disadvantage on attacks against yourself or another creature. The target of the spell cannot be charmed, frightened or posessed by these creatures  and if that already happend before you cast the spell, it rolls saving throws to shake it off with an advantage. A lot of lovecraftian horrors try to eat your teammate and future god for his future god powers, this will help against that.

Our regular spell for this level will be Absorb Elements. You can cast it as a reaction whenever you take acid, cold, fire, lightning, or thunder damage and it grants you resistance to that and next time you hit a target on your next turn, it takes extra 1d6 of that type of damage. This second feature is less impressive at higher levels where a lot of creatures dealing that type of damage are resitant or outright immune to it. Every dragon is immune to the damage dealt by its breath for example. EXCEPT that as a Palanar Warrior you convert that to force damage. Their offense just makes you hit harder.

4th Level: Sticking with Ranger for an Abilitty Score Improvement or a Feat. Resilent lets you add 1 to your Constitution and makes you proficient with Constitution saving throw. a large number of your spells is depending on Concentration so this is a good way to keep going even after you take a hit.

5th Level: Ranger gains an extra attack, letting you attack twice in a single attack action. Remember, those attacks are all affected by your Planar Warrior power.

You also gain access to 2nd level spells 

Lesser Restoration, letting you cure one disease or a  blinded, deafened, paralyzed, or poisoned condition from one creature. America heals fast.

Horizon Walker gives us Misty Step, which lets you teleport 30 feet to an unoccupied space you can see.

6th Level: You can pick second Deft Explorer feature. I will go with Roving to increase your speed by 5 feet and give you climbing and swimming speed equal to your walking speed. America is fast and with that you can move to your foes no matter where they are.

7th Level: Horizon Walker gives you Etheral Step. You can now once per short or long rest cast, as a bonus action, Etherealnesss on yourself without expending a spell slot but it only lasts one turn. It lets you step into Ethereal Plane where you can move without being affected by enemies or walls or magic effects on material plane. You can use this to move aout of the harm’s way or (more likely) behind enemy lines to punch that one guy who keeps hiding behind the tank.

You also get one more spell but I’m not feeling these 2nd level spells so we will pick Longstrider, which increases your movement speed by 10 feet for 1 hour, no concentration required. This means you can now walk, climb, swim or fly up to 45 feet per turn. And you cannot tell me America isn’t super fast, considering in her debut book she did this

8th Level: We will now jump to Cleric. America has multitude of things she could worship, be it Demiurge or Spirits Beracca and Sanar who created your home planet or even your moms and their messianic-like sacrifice. Or not, Clerics don’t need to worship a diety, they can draw the power from just believing this strongly in something the universe registers it as faith. Lou Wilson on The Unsleeping City plays a Cleric who is a doctor that draws power from caring about his patients so much, you don’t need to limit yourself just because you may dislike certain parts of character history.

Whatever your reasons, you get to pick a Divine Domain. Since America can travel between dimensions, she basically is a Planeswalker. Meaning she can jump to Magic: the Gathering setting Amonketh from one of Planeshift supplements and grab the Strength Domain. You gain proficiency in one extra skill, pick Survival, and heavy armor.

You also get Cleric spellcasting, which works as Ranger’s except you know all your Cleric spells and you prepare which spells you have ready each day. You also get cantrips, which you can cast as many times as you want. Your number of spell slots is determined by multiclassing table -  check out a level equal your Cleric level + half your Ranger level rounded down to consult how many spell slots you have for use.

You get 3 Cantrips, two spells and two extra spells and an extra cantrip from Strength domain so we have some work to do.

Guidance and Resistance each lets you add a d4 to a single ability check or a saving throw respectively. This shit is life saving. No, I did not spend my last game lamenting guidance is not on Bard Spell list after my bard failed an important skill check by 1, why are you asking?

Thunderclap lets you clap your hands so hard every creature 5 feet from you needs to make a Constitution saving throw or be dealt 1d6 thunder damage. It is a staple for powerhouses, Hulk basically patented it.

Bless lets you pick up to 3 creatures, including yourself. For the duration they add 1d4 to attack rolls and saving throws

Detect Magic lets you sense or see influence of magic within 30 feet from you unless it’s hiding behind a thick enough barrier. Again, America been around, she can recognize a lot of tricks.

Divine Favor lets you add 1d4 of Radiant damage to your attacks. America’s punches are that strong.

Shield of Faith meanwhile grants you +2 bonus to your AC. Again, short shorts can barelly pass for light armor, less alone medium or heavy so you need all help you can get.

9th Level: 2nd Level Cleric gets to use their Channel Divinity.once per short or long rest

The standard use is Turn Undead, which forces all undead who see you to make a Wisdom saving throw or be turned for 1 minute or until they take damage, making them unable to do anything but spend their turn dashing away from you. You may say it is not in character but America travelled across the Multiverse a lot. Do you know what you can find in Marvel Multiverse a lot? Zombies. Especially Marvel Zombies. And even then, regular zombies in D&D are also know as “PAIN IN THE BUTT TO FIGHT WITH” so whichever kind of undead is bothering you, this will help.

Strength Domain grants you another use of this, Feat of Strength. You can choose to spend your use of Channel Divinity to add +10 to an attack roll, abilitty check or saving throw using Strength.

Finally, Unearthed Arcana lets you spend your use of this feature to regain a 1st level spell slot. It’s situational, but could be useful in a pinch.

Our spell for the level will be Sanctuary - cast it on one creature of your choice to make enemies have to roll a Wisdom saving throw whenever they want to target it with an attack or a harmful spell or have to choose another target. You can play this one as goading enemies to fight her to distract them from civilians or your mroe squishy teammates like Billy or Loki. Warning, don’t waste it on either Kate or Quentin Quire, they are likely to just go and shoot someone and the spell ends if target attacks someone, casts a harmful spell or causes damage from an already active spell. So no, Quentin, you cannot cast Spirit Guardians and then have America Sanctuary you, stop asking and read an errata already!

10th Level: 3rd Level Cleric gets 2 2nd Level spell slots

Aid lasts for an hour and lets you increase hit point maximum and current hit points of up to 3 party members by fve, always useful as a form of a battle plan to keep everyone safe.

Warding Bond lets you for an hour create a bond between you and another creature for 1 hour with no concentration. As long as the target is within 60 feet of you it gets +1 to AC and resistance to all damage but whenever it takes damage, you take as much damage and if you get further than 60 feet away from one another or you drop to 0 hit points, the spell ends. So cast this on Kate, Monica or Billy who are squishy but know to stay in the back. Don’t cast it on Ramone, Eddie, Adam, Teddy, Carol, T’Challa, Noh-Varr, Gwen, David, Eli or Galactus who are likely to be with you in the front line. And don’t cast it on Quentin, he is squishy and should stay in the back but he cannot be trusted, this kid has no self-perservation instinc whatsoever. Same goes for Loki, who is supposed to be smarter but still keeps poking everything around for one scheme or another.

Strength Domain gives us Enchance Abilitty, which grants you an advantage on abilitty chekcs of chosen Ability score and some minor bonuses if you pick Strength, Dexterity or Constitution. As I’ve said, America is good at everything as if she was an anime character, this will help you emulate that.

Protection from Poison for an hour, no concentration, gives the target advantage on saving throws against being poisoned and resistance to poison damage and when cast removes one poison already affecting the target.

11th Level: 4th Level Cleric gets an Abilitty Score Improvement, invest in your Strength. Spoiler, this will be where all your remaining Abilitty Score improvements will go.

You get one more cantrip and one more spell

Virtue grants the target 1d4+your spellcasting abilitty modifier of temporary hit points for one round

Branding Smite, which was added in Unearthed Arcana, lets you deal extra 2d6 Radiant damage and if the target was invisible it now becomes visible and cannot becopme invisible for the duration of the spell as it shines bright light in 5-feet radius. America punching someone out of their invisiblity so hard they now glitter? Sounds about right.

12th Level: 5th Level Cleric can destroy all undead of challenge rating 1/2 or less who failed saving throw against turn undead. 

You get even more spells, gaining access to third level ones.

Remove Curse lets you remove effects of a curse from a person or break attunment to cursed item. Use it on yourself to simply shrug off the enemy curses

Tongues lets you understand any language and be understood by all other creatures for an hour. You ever noticed how all realities America goes to seem to speak English? This may be why.

Protection From Energy lets you get resistance to  acid, cold, fire, lightning, or thunder. for the duration, on concentration of course.

Haste also lasts on concentration. it doubles your speed, grants +2 to AC, an advantage on Dexterity saving throws and an extra attaction you can use to take Dash, Disengage, Hide or use object action or make a single extra attack. Once it ends you cannot take actions for a turn, 

13th Level: 6th Level Cleric can use Channel Divinity twice per short or long rest, gains a new use from Strength domain, letting you as a reaction grant +10 to another creature’s attack roll, ability check or saving throw using Strength. Sometimes you jsut want to cheer up on your girlfriend to punch someone harder, you know?

You also get to pick one more spell - magic Circle lets you ward an area of 10 feet radius and 20 feet height from celestials, elementals, fey, fiends, or undead, whichever you choose. You can either protect creatures inside from that type of enemies or trap them inside the circle. Either way the selected creature type cannot willingly cross the border of the circle, had disadvantage against targets on the other side cannot charm, frighter or possess and if it tries to circumvent this by using teleportation of any sort it needs to first succeed a Charisma saving throw.

14th Level: 7th Level Cleric gets 4th level spells

Freedom of Movement lets you for one hour, no concentration required, make yourself unaffected by difficult terrain and magic cannot in any way reduce your speed, restrain or paralyze you, you can spend 5 feet from your movement to escape nonmagical restraints and being underwater doesn’t impose any penalty on your movement.

Dominate Beast isn’t really in character so I will focus on second bonus spell Strength Domain gives you - Stoneskin grants you resistance to nonmagical Bludgeoning, Piercing and Slashing damage

Stoneskin is not an excuse to wear this awful outfit from Vengenace, tho.

15th Level: 8th Level Cleric gains Divine Strike, letting you once on each of your turns add extra 1d8 of that damage type. You also get to pick another Abilitty Score improvement and your Destroy Undead abilitty upgrades to undeads of CR 1 or less.

Your spell for this level will be Banishment, forcing a Charisma Saving throw on the target and sending it to another dimension if it fails. If the target is native to this plane, it is send to a harmless dimension and comes back once spell ends. But if it is not, it is send to its home plane and if you maintain concentration for one minute, it does not return. As with Magic Circle this is less something we hase SEEN America do but sounds like something she should be able to do. Open a portal under something and let it fall.

16th Level: 9th Level Cleric gets one spell of 4th level and one of 5th level.

Greater Restoration lets you remove from atarget a single level of exhaustion, one curse, one reduction of an abilitty score or hit point maximum, one effect that charmed or petrified the target. Use this on yourself to shrug off everything. Except perficication, kinda hard to use this while petrified.

Strength Domain gives you two extra spells, but Insect Plague isn’t very in character. Destructive Wave, however, lets you strike the ground, making every creature of your choice within 30-feet range take 5d6 thunder and 5d6 radiant or necrotic damage and be knocked prone, half damage on a succesful Constitution saving throw. You stomp the ground that hard.

Death Ward lasts for 8 hours with no concentration, first time a target would be dropped to zero hit points, they’re dropped to 1 hit points instead. If an effect would kill target instantly without dealing damage (say POWER WORD: KILL) it is negated. Either way the spell ends after a single activation. Sounds useful considering one of people on America’s shit list is COSMIC TITAN CHAMPION OF DEATH 

17th Level: 10th Level Cleric gains Divine Intervention, which lets you call upon the power of whoever you picked as your patron diety. You describe what you want to happen and roll a percentage dice - if your result is lower than your Cleric level, diety intervenes in a way choosen by the DM. If you succed on this, you cannot use this feature for a week, if you fail you cannto do it until after a long rest.

You get one new Cantrip and one new 5th Level Spell

Word of Radiance forces all creatures of your choice to suceed a Constitution saving throw or take 4d6 radiant damage. You shine so bright you literally hurt your enemies.

Legend Lore lets you gain knowledge about a legendary object, person or location, up to mysterious secrets. Again, America has been travelling through the Multiverse, she likely has seen everything and recalls things that seem to be happenning again.Information may be a bit cyrptic, tho.

18th Level: 11th Level Cleric’s Destroy Undead improves to undeads of CR 2 or lower. You also get an access to 6th Level Spell - otherwordly Form was added to Cleric Spell List in Unearthed Arcana. It lets you for the duration (up to 1 minute on concentration) grant yourself flying speed of 40 feet, use of your Wisdom in place of Strength for attack rolls, an additional attack that doesn’t stack with your extra attack and immunity to either fire and poison damage and poisoned condition or radiant and necrotic damage and charmed comdition. This will help if you out of your Radiant Soul and need to fly again, but it is sadly not as good on this particular build because we already have an extra attack and rely more on Strength than Wisdom. But Clerics don’t get Fly.

19th Level: Speaking of Strength, 12th Level fo Cleric and our Final Abilitty Score Improvement lets us finally cap it.

20th Level: Our captsone is 13th Level of Cleric for a 7th Level spell - Plane Shift lets you become your party’s ticked to the Multiverse, letting you transport yourself and up to 8 willing creatures to another plane of existence or to banish an unwilling creature to a random location on a plane you choose if you hit it with a meele spell attack you make as a part of this spell and it fails Charisma Saving throw.

Overview: So this is my take on America Chavez - Protector Aasimar Horizon Walker Ranger 7/Strength Domain Cleric 13. Now let us see how valiable this build is:

Pros: First of all, you are really tough, with around 165 hit points, a number of spells you can set up to buff yourself  and/or others you will be very hard to hurt. Second, you have a large number of ways to hurt your enemies and even combine them to deal some impressive damage. Finally, you have a ton of mobility options, letting you chase all most important targets all across the battlefield.

Cons: A lot of your spells require concentration and we didn’t cap this one, so it is mediocre. A lot of your offensive options compete for bonus action and your buffs require some prep time and forward thinking to set up or wasting your time during the combat. A number of offensive spells relies on your Wisdom modifier, which is weak.

However, you are pretty good at what you do best - punching and taking on yourself major threats. You are a reliable tank who can outlast her enemies in combat. Punch people and protect your friends, jsut remember you cannot do it all alone and your teammates are much more squishy - protect them and they’ll have your back

Alternatives:

There is a number of ways in which you could upgrade this build but sacrifice some of loyalty to America’s potrayal.

* Ranger 6/Cleric 14 lets you increase your Divine Strike Damage to 2d8, meaning you can deal 4d8 damage when combined with Planar Warrior.

* Ranger 12/Cleric 8 lets you increase your Planat Warrior Damage and gains extra attack from Horizon Walker’s 11th level feature, making you much more offensive but also with more hp.

* Change stats to STR 12 DEX 13 CON 14 INT 10 WIS 15  CHA 8. Pick Druidic Warrior as your fighting style, grab a club or a staff and pick shillelagh as your cantrip, letting you use your Wisdom for attacks made with said club or staff, then go Ranger 8/Cleric 12 or vice-versa, using your Abilitty Score Improvements to round up first Wisdom and then Constitution. This take on America will have much better offense AND defense but it strays so much from her as a character (no plane shift, no punching with your hands, less actual Strength and more trickery) it didn’t feel right. Sometimes you need to sacrifice power to stay loyal to the character. Then again, this build would sure be true to a certain aspect of America we know and love.

- Admin

#America #Ms. America #America Chavez #Ms. America Chavez #Marvel #Dungeons & Dragons

[noahhernandez]

2/9/2015 v. 8/11/2020

1:Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. My favorite movie is Scream, and it started when I saw the midnight premier of Scream 4 with my dad back when I was in 8th grade, then Scream 1 came on AMC late on night and I just really like it

I still think Scream is one of my favorites, but Halloween has jumped up there just because I am obsessed with all things horror really lol. I started to love Halloween because of the new trilogy.

2:Talk about your first kiss. It’s really not that interesting but really like embarrassing. It was with my first boyfriend and I had just turned 15 and we were at the school just walking around and we went into the band hall and I was like ok im leaving and he was like wait and we kissed and i was like o

the same ! 

3:Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for. I never really have had intense feelings for anyone. I d k

One my exes- I mean we were dating for awhile so that’s pretty intense to me. 

4:Talk about the thing you regret most so far. I regret… Nothing really I mean, I have done really bad things in my life, but i don’t regret them

I regret failing like 2 semesters of college lmao and almost dropping out. If i didn’t then I would 1- would have been done earlier and 2- would have already completed a year of grad school but IDK also another is wasting lots of money in 2017-2018

5:Talk about the best birthday you’ve had. The best birthday I’ve had was.. Idk This year was was nice I saw Iggy Azalea in concert, then I celebrated my friends’ birthday then mine and it was just everyone got to get together so ya this year my 18th

For my 21st birthday I went to Portland, Oregon and spent the weekend there and it was pretty and my first time there so it was nice despite what I think about PDX now. I don’t even know what I was doing for my 19 and 20th birthday lol. 

6:Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had. My 17th birthday because I was stuck 2 hours away from home with a bunch of nerds doing a band competition 

That is still probably my worst birthday. I forget to mention that I was gone literally from like 7am to midnight. They werent a bunch of loser nerds, they were my friends, but I still wish I was just at home lol. 

7:Talk about your biggest insecurity. I am skinny, but not fit. If I eat anything I get this like stomach and it makes me so sad. and ever since I got a job I work odd hours and I eat a lot of fast food and I’ve gained 10 pounds in 2 years and I guess i’m insecure about my weight

I am still insecure about my weight, and I probably weight like 5 pounds more than I did when I made this post 5 1/2 years ago. 

8:Talk about the thing you are most proud of. We have band banquets for band, and I only went my sophomore and junior year, and seniors give out awards to underclassmen that are just jokes really, and both years 4 different seniors gave me an award for being the biggest gossip in the entire band and I was proud of that lol

Well since then I have graduated both high school and college. I am proud that I finished college !! A BS in Psych. Proud of myself that I got promoted (in 2017) at my job; i’m proud of myself that I have my own apartment, and blah blah basically just doing regular adult shit. 

9:Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. I like my nose because of how perfectly fixed it is. I also really like my freckles/moles/dark marks idk what they are exactly, but they’re on my face and they look great

I still feel the same way about this, maybe add my eyebrows- they’re not like clean and nice they’re just expression markers on my face that i love.

10:Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had. I got into a fight with my old friend Angelica and that was almost 4 months ago and we used to be best friends and now we never talk.

When Janett didn’t talk to me all summer of 2019 because I told our other friend Angel something

11:Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had. I cant remember one 12:Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had. I can’t remember one

13:Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. The closest thing i’ve had to like sex was being locked in a back of an SUV with a stranger drunk as fuck and naked and its embarrassing

Just awkward and nothing to which I expected. 

14:Talk about a vacation. When I was 16, the high school band took a trip to Hawaii, and all my friends were in band so it was great. We did a lot of things, we toured Pearl Harbor and even played a few patriotic songs on the USS Miss. and our hotel was on Wakiki beach. I went snorkeling in some beautiful water and shit and idk just walked all around Hawaii having a great time omg we got on stage at the Hard Rock Cafe and sang with German people i miss it

Hm that was fun. But I.. went to NY with my ex and that was pretty cool because I literally love New York, and I went to NOLA two years ago (today actually) and got miserably drunk so that was fun too 

15:Talk about the time you were most content in life. Probably just in the middle of junior year when everything and everyone was going with the flow

I feel like 2016 was a very content year because I remember nothing about it. 

16:Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to. Idk which one to talk about the one where I had a lot of fun and risked my life or the one where there was a lot of drama stirred up and drank myself to sadness. 

I haven’t really been to a party? I have gone out and had good times. Really anytime my friends and I go out I am having a good time 

17:Talk about someone you want to be friends with. I am already friends with people I want to be friends with

18:Talk about something that happened in elementary school. I kissed a boy on the back of the head and i told I just fell onto his head

Let me think of another one. Back in like fourth grade my friend was in a wheel chair and his backpack was falling from the back and I was trying to grab it and i was only 3 feet tall i couldnt see over or wasnt paying attention and i crashed him right into the bookshelves at the library. 

19:Talk about something that happened in middle school. A girl was mad at me because idk why lol and she pushed me in the hall way and I fucking flew across that hall on the floor and hit the wall she’s pregnant now

When I was in 5th grade (which is considered middle school in my district) I was standing on the play ground and someone threw a stick at my head and it knocked me the fuck out and I was bleeding from my temple.

20:Talk about something that happened in high school. In Jr. Year I was pulling into the parking lot but I was texting and I accidentally put half my car on grass area near the side walk luckily it was 7am and only one person saw me do it lol

One summer going into our senior year we had a party at Michelle’s house. First of all we were very drunk and Coby’s parents were like we are coming over and we cleaned TF UP so fast and sat on the couch and turned on I Know What You Did Last Summer and his parents were like interesting and and left and then we continued to drink anyways- we started playing truth or dare and my friend Angelica was like I dare u to kiss Anthony (someone I had liked prior) and he wouldnt and we started attacking him and calling him homophobic and hitting him with pillows lmao- him and I are still friend-ish

21:Talk about a time you had to turn someone down. I can’t think of something right now.

Literally anyone on grindr.

22:Talk about your worst fear. I’m afraid of having no career and being stuck doing something I hate and living paycheck to paycheck

Yeah, I’m scared of that still but I.. think just like being broke and jobless. RN with the pandemic we aren’t really working and still getting gov’t assistance, so.  IDK being a real real adult scares me a lot. 

23:Talk about a time someone turned you down. I can’t think of a time :)

One time in like 2016 maybe idk - this dude told me to come over and he lived far like not that far maybe 25 minutes lol far for me anyways I got to his apartment and there was a gate code and i asked him what it was and he didnt answer and it was like 2-3am and nobody was coming in or out and so i was like damn this sucks lmao

24:Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot. Nothing really has meant a lot to me. Everyone tells me the same thing over and over again and its so surface level

I still can’t think of anything but I’m sure the friends I have met since this and my friends Faith, Michelle, Peter, and Alisa have said something supportive that meant a lot to me. 

25:Talk about an ex-best friend. Angelica Ramirez. She was my best friend for only 3 years, but together we went through A LOT of shit. We started out senior year just fine, but she lied about a few things and made a lot of us feel like crap in October. I won’t lie, I do miss her. We have too many memories to just forget, too many funny stories and great adventures. She helped me with too much, and sometimes I think about how I cut her out of my life and I mad a bad choice. But only time can heal things and I have moved on and truly found people that won’t make me mad every 30 seconds. 

Brianna Pajak, I don’t remember anything about her except she was poor and we stopped being friends because she always wanted to fight and be annoying. 

26:Talk about things you do when you’re sick. Lay on bed on my computer and watch TV

I normally just suffer and cry about wishing I was healthy again.

27:Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body. Their…!!>>>??? 

I must have nice hands and ur nose must be nice too! so nose and hands. lol

28:Talk about your fetishes. none

yeah I don’t have any lol not that I can think of. 

29:Talk about what turns you on. Idk i really like kissing and touching and this is awkward. 

30:Talk about what turns you off. bad breath by

that and ugly/rough hands, acne sorry i know it is natural but, shorter than me lol, white people, long hair on guys, and thats about it i think hm i am single yes 

31:Talk about what you think death is like. I think its like idk its scary tho

um idk i dont like thinking about death because i literally want to cry when i think about it. 

32:Talk about a place you remember from your childhood. I remember being in trees a lot

My step grandma’s a lot because my parents were working and she would watch us. She passed away about a month ago :( 

33:Talk about what you do when you are sad. I usually only tell one person and that person is Alisa and I cry sometimes to her and expect her to make things better and she does thank u

I be doing the same thing, I text someone and that person could really be anyone but it happened the other day and I texted Bri and she was very helpful. 

34:Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured. I have no idea, I’ve never broken pulled strained twisted fractures or anything i have no life

I still haven’t done any of that stuff to my body. I also have burn scars but I did not feel those when it was happening. I would just say i guess my wisdom teeth coming in because I did not get them removed. I have 3 out lol.

35:Talk about things you wish you could stop doing. Pushing potential love interests away 

I have had some ‘love interests’ since this post, but it’s been about a year now since and I kind of push away the opportunity of getting close to someone. I also need to stop being a bitch sometimes. 

36:Talk about your guilty pleasures. eating 

I would say idk eating was a stupid answer. 

37:Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. never

I was in love and i didn’t ‘think’ I was in love. I don’t know what you mean by talk about them, they were my partner but we broke up hehe.

38:Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. Fireflies by Owl City reminds me of my 7th grade crush Fancy by Iggy Azalea reminds me of my two friends Michelle and Alisa idk anything else

um Idk. i rly cant think  39:Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier. I wish I would have known that

That it’s okay to tell people you’re struggling lol . That is okay to fail sometimes (school).  40:Talk about the end of something in your life. everything is just about to start

When I ended how to get away with murder I wish I never did I love that show with all my heart. 

#personal

[fleetingfigures]

|| 2020: A Retrospective ||

With the year coming to a close soon, thank god, I thought it’d be cool to take a look back and see what’s transpired in FFXIV as well as this blog! Anyone also reading this, I invite to do the same, if you have time of course. It’s always nice to close out the year thinking of the positives. Though, without further ado let’s goooo~

Blog-Related

- Actually, well, started using this thing! Met a lot of cool peeps and had the chance to actually break out into the world RP thanks to it.

- Almost hit 100 followers, just 5 shy! 

- Top 10 Posts of the Year!

1). Promise Me You’ll... 116 notes - Aug 19 2020 

First and only post I’ve had reach 100 notes! Mighty proud of the posing I pulled off for this, and who knows, I might make a sequel in due time. WoL!AU’s are still very much my weakness. And G’raha. He’s a weakness of mine too, if it wasn’t readily apparent already.

2). LFRP - Saerno Glista (Balmung/Crystal DC)  75 notes - Jan 28 2020. 

Ah... My old LFRP. I even updated it, but I feel the need to change it again, especially given the fact I’m Giving my Carrd a complete overhaul. Might do the same to this blog too lmao. New Year new me as they say, but in actuality a lot has occurred for a certain catboy and things must be adjusted.

3). I Was Busy Thinking ‘Bout Boys  70 notes - Dec 5 2020

I was surprised this even got the attention it did lol. Seems NPC-related content is my most popular stuff. Also I am highly disappointed no one could recognize Arnott from the HW anima weapon quests. Y-yea he’s a very minor NPC, but I think he’s a cutie.

4). Black Mage is a Fun Class 51 notes - May 6 2020

The first of my fun class series! Originally wasn’t supposed to be a series at all, but I decided that every class in the game deserved some love! Also can I just say how much I love staves? Oh and the pagos bandana. It fits oddly well Sae imo.

5). Eden’s Promise Eternity 46 notes - Dec 18 2020

One of my more recent posts, and one not all too involved in the posing. Though, like I said in the post, the MOMENT I saw that arena, I fell in love with its lighting. OST is also a banger. Glad that people enjoyed random glamour shots with Gshade improving the already good lighting.

6). A Guide to Arcanima 42 notes - Sep 28 2020

The post I put the most time into... Photoshopping became so tedious at some points, but it was well worth it! I’m proud of the result and the opportunity to share some of my views upon the RP-flexibility of Arcanima.

7). Random Shower Thought 32 notes - Feb 9 2020

...I genuinely do not remember making this post.

8). Astrologian is a Fun Class 31 notes - Nov 30 2020

My old healing main, but still without a doubt the most beautiful class in the game. I wish Tumblr didn’t restrict gif sizes, but I understand the need for people’s devices to not implode when loading resources. So much grain could be reduced and more detail could be added, but alas. The screenshot at the end is still my favorite screenshot of Sae I’ve taken, even if it’s not IC.

9). Crystarium Coat of Scouting 29 notes - Mar 20 2020

And I still stand by my statements today. Since last tier is a patch behind us now, I could spare some augments to finally dye the coat. And, like a basic bitch, I’ve made Saerno’s ninja Rogue glamour jet black as far as the eye can see; all leather, of course. What is a rogue really without their leather?

10). 26 notes - Nov 16 2020

One of my first gifsets next to my Ninja ones! It Showcases the wonderful land of La Noscea, Sae’s only true home, and highlights some of his personal favorite areas! Hence why Limsa is barely pictured. He likes the city, but growing up in the country makes one appreciate the more natural side of La Noscea.

(Created by TumblrTop10)

In-Game

- Levelled all classes to 80! Though it does feel a bit hollow not being able to get xp for doing stuff now...

- Started Raiding... Well, seriously. I used to be a scrub and only do e1,e5 and e6 savage in PF, but a friend’s static needed a healer and they all but convinced me I was good enough to join. It’s been a hell of a ride, I’ll finally be going into e12s soon, but my experiences thus far have been awesome to say the least. I feel like I’m actually getting the most out of this game now that I both savage raid and take the time to RP.

- FINALLY GOT A HOUSE ON BALMUNG. 

God was the release of the new wards hella stressful. Stayed up all night, logged on the second I could, booted up next to the ferryman. Didn’t get my ideal plot, but got the neighboring one. I finally got to house something with more than 100 slots, and for that, I am eternally thankful.

- Finished those goddamn Shared Fates. And all so I could get a piece of music and possibly make a few million gil selling other SHB area themes. Crystarium night theme is the GOAT and you cannot tell me otherwise.

Roleplay

- Actually RP’ed outside of my circle of friends! Now I haven’t had the time recently to seriously go back to it like I once did, but the things I’ve learned and the people I’ve met... I wouldn’t trade it for the world. With this upcoming new year, and me taking a small break from Uni, I think I’ll begin in earnest again! First I’ve gotta update all these damn sites first to better reflect where Saerno is now.

- New Plotlines realized, old ones closed up. It’s cathartic and oh so satisfying, in a way, to see your OC go through legitimate change and to have them put a cap upon a phase of their life, slowly moving on to the next. While Saerno is still as brash as ever, he’s begun to realize just how fragile his life is. To slow down, to sit back, rest, to think about the direction his life is headed, that is the essence of his new arc.

- Secrets to uncover. To keep things brief and without many spoiler, Saerno has made the transition from Arcanist to Summoner, but with it comes its own host of problems, ones that Saerno has to grapple lest things take a turn for the worse.

- Potential Alts. Well, now that I have money again... I may actually follow through on one of the many alt ideas I’ve had, some tangentially tied to Saerno’s own story, others completely unrelated. A tailor with an unrequited love that’s inspired him throughout his hardships? Perhaps the prodigal daughter of a family whose cunning nature only fuels her desire of pure freedom? Or maybe the son of Doman liberators, trying desperately to gain the approval and praise of others so that his parents’ name do not die out completely. So many choices... 

And, well, that’s all! So far while 2020 has been quite terrible, at least I have these moments to look back upon fondly. Thanks to any and all of your who have been here this year, and here’s to hoping for a wonderful 2021! 

#ffxiv #rp #Balmung #Screenshots #Saerno Glista #Thank you all! #And a Happy New Year in advance~ #It's been a lovely year for my creativity

[shoeshoecin]

I recently requested a prayer from Skippy when my mothers was seriously ill. Skippy and Brewster both contributed to the prayer and they really got through me through difficult times. We buried my mother aka Nana today and we all said goodbye. My daughter read her this letter at the funeral today and I wanted to share it with you. I never post on tumblr I enjoy all #megxit posts and appreciate your insight and research regarding MM.

Dear Nana,

​The last time that we talked you told me that you don’t like funerals. When I asked, “why?”, you said, “at funerals people just say a bunch of nice stuff about the person that everyone knows wasn’t really true.” To that I ensured you that people only have nice things to say about you because you are simply the best. Although, you didn’t seem convinced, but you can put your fears to rest because I promise I am only going to say things that are 100% honest.

​On the topic of honesty, you are the most honest person I have ever met. A bit brutally honest actually. For example, I remember coming back from the beach one day and you asked me if I gained the “freshman 15” after going away to college. A bit perplexed by your sudden question, I replied, “umm..I don’t really know, I haven’t weighed myself…why? Do you think I’ve gained weight?” You said, “well yeah. You look like you’ve gained some weight. Maybe not a full 15...maybe more like 5 or 10. You still look good though.” Even though that probably wasn’t what I was looking to hear while I stood in the kitchen in my bikini, I can appreciate the honesty. Another example of your honestly was the time that I painted you a watercolor painting of a cat (because I know how much you love cats). I was so excited to give it to you after working on it all night, and when I presented it to you, you look one look and said, “what happened to the tail? The tail is too short it looks like something happened to it.” I said, “oh yeah, I guess the tail is a little short, but do you like it?” You replied to my hopeful question with, “well, it’d be nicer if the tail was longer, but I’ll still hang it up.” Yup, you are definitely not scared to speak your mind. If I ever need an ego check, you know where I’ll be. With that being said, despite the small blows to my self esteem, I’ve always admired your honesty as it was quite refreshing and always consistent.

​Speaking of consistency, you are one of the very few people that I can always count on to be consistent. For example, everyone always looks forward to going to Nana’s for dinner because everything you bake or cook is always amazing. From your angel hair pasta, to your lima beans, to your brownies, zucchini bread, pies and magical (almost too perfect) assortment of Christmas cookies every year, everything you make is always consistently delicious. Even from the youngest age, I always knew that I could look forward to dinner and dessert at Nana’s. You are also extremely consistent when it comes to buying anything marketed as “NEW!” I know that if I walk into your kitchen there will always be a package of the newest limited edition of Oreos sitting there…unopened. Even your response to the question, “Nana why did you buy these?” was consistently, “it’s new!” You’ve never failed to tell me how much you dislike the fact that my jeans are ripped and I actually bought them like that. I can always expect to see clean clothes perfectly hanging on the clothes line in the yard. You consistently wear Keds and cashmere sweaters while eating a sticky bun from the bakery in the morning. You are also pretty consistent with feeding the dog at family parties even when my mom and Johnny Z asked everyone not to. Watching you feed Marsden huge chunks of cheese and crackers under the table right after being asked not to always made me laugh. You always keep a pitcher of iced tea in the fridge, fresh peaches on the counter, and mint chocolate chip ice cream in your freezer (never the white mint though because according to you the white mint does not taste the same as the green mint ice cream, and you will not eat the white mint). I’m really glad that mint chocolate chip is your favorite flavor of ice cream, because it’s my favorite too.

Sometimes I wonder where I got my sweet tooth, but if you’ve ever stayed up past midnight with Nana, you would know that the timeframe of 12 am to 3 am is filled with candy, sour cream and onion chips, popsicles, Cheetos, and ice cream sundaes. People always think that you don’t eat very much, but you and I both know that they just don’t stay up late enough to witness the late night snacking that happens over a game of scrabble, while baggage or family feud is playing on the TV. These late nights have been some of my favorite memories over the years, and you always gave your best advice during these times. For example, I vividly remember one summer night at age 16. I was on my second bowl of what was now melted mint ice cream and losing pretty bad at a game of scrabble. To make matters worse, all the letters I was left with were all vowels and my mind drifted to the break up I had earlier that day. Shockingly, I began to cry for probably the 7th time that day, and you said, “Oh god what are you crying for? You should be happy. Now you can play the field. Playing the field is much more fun than having just one boyfriend.” Like I said, you always give the best advice.

As I’m thinking about all the advice you’ve given me, I am reminded of all the other things that you’ve shown and taught me. For example, thanks to you, I know what its like to walk into a room with a celebrity. I remember it like it was yesterday, one rainy night my mom and I drove down to play a game of bingo with you. When we walked in the door, I was immediately stopped and questioned by the tight security who asked to see my ID because I apparently looked “12” – which would be a no-go considering that apparently the bingo staff takes the age restrictions of bingo very seriously. Just as I was about to show the security my proof of ID to confirm that I was in fact above the age of 18, you came to our rescue. A simple, “they’re with me,” and all of a sudden we were treated like royalty and all further questions turned into staff members offering us refreshments. I learned something else that night too. It was brought to my attention that my mom and I are really bad at bingo, like really bad. It’s a good thing that you were there to inform us that our cards were upside down and we had been playing the game completely wrong for the first half hour. By the end of the four-hour bingo game, you were playing all of our cards for us alongside the 20 that you had laid out in front of you, while my mom and I resorted to eating gummy bears and counting the number of sneezes for every minute that went by. Watching you play bingo was honestly an honor because that takes a level of skill I most definitely did not inherit. When I think about you, I think about good times like these, and how honored I am to be your granddaughter.

Although above all, when I think about you, I think about how strong you are. A particular moment of strength was the time that you broke your hip on the fourth of July. Most people would probably be crying or at least deeply concerned with the physical pain they were experiencing, but you were much more concerned with the deviled eggs that were in your hands when you fell along with who was going to make the pie if you went to the hospital. Unfortunately for us, the blueberry pie was left in the hands of Uncle Jeff…and I’m just gonna go ahead and say, your concerns were all too valid. To be honest I’ve always thought about my mom and wondered how she became such a strong, independent, and amazing woman, but now I can clearly see that its because she always had you to look up to. And I want to thank you for being someone that I could also always look up to. Thank you for teaching me all about the virtue of honesty. Thank you for being someone I could always consistently depend on to be there. Thank you for all of the late night chats and all of your priceless advice. Thank you for passing on your love of baking and sharing a sweet tooth with me. Thank you for gracing me with the honor of learning how to play bingo from a real pro. Thank you for showing me what a strong, kind, and beautiful woman looks like. Thank you for everything.

I started this letter by referencing the last time we we had the chance to talk. You explained why you don’t like funerals because of the apparent lack of honesty. Well, I hope this letter delivered the kind of authenticity that you were hoping for because I just have one last thing that I would like to revisit. In that same conversation, after we had discussed the flaws within funerals, I told you that I love you. You replied by saying, “aw I love you too, and I hope that I can love you from heaven. I think I can.” Your response to my statement was one that I will never forget. So, I just want to say that I will always love you, no matter where you are. Thank you for being you.

Love,

Ella

[back-and-totheleft]

Oliver Stone thinks Hollywood is crazy

Beginning in 1986 with the release of his films “Salvador” and “Platoon,” Oliver Stone kicked off a decade-long run of remarkable success. Many of the controversial and stylistically brash films that he made during this era were box-office hits and established Stone, who twice won the Academy Award for best director, as a bold generational voice. While films like “Wall Street” and “Natural Born Killers” didn’t have a particularly nuanced take on the rotten amorality at our society’s core, and the treatment of the country’s self-deceptions in “Born on the Fourth of July” and “J.F.K.” wasn’t especially subtle, no one could deny that Stone’s work spoke directly to America’s dreams and nightmares. Since then, though, the director’s standing as a finger-on-the-pulse filmmaker has been gradually subsumed by the image of him as a political provocateur, thanks to his documentaries about the likes of Fidel Castro and Vladimir Putin. But it’s the long lead-up to that golden year of 1986 that is the focus of Stone’s upcoming memoir, “Chasing the Light,” in which all his questionable bravado and self-admitted insecurity are on full display. “I never wanted arguments,” Stone says. “I never wanted to provoke. I was just seeking the truth.” You’ve made a lot of movies and documentaries based on other people’s lives. Did that experience help you tell the story of your own? 

Well, I thought of the book as having the structure of a novel. You set up a problem in the first chapter: The protagonist is in a box. He’s in New York City, 1976. He’s broke. He feels like a failure and has to take his whole life into account. Then the novel winds its way into the 1986 period. It’s a picaresque. It’s a bit like a Thackeray novel. Should I be reading into the fact that you’re calling your memoir a novel and referring to yourself in the third person? 

You can read what you want. It is “me,” but you have to distance yourself from yourself. That’s not to say you’re fictionalizing. If I write another book, which I hope to do, it’d be nice to get closer to where I am now. I’m not there yet. Making a film to close out your life? I don’t know. There might be a way. There have been some very nice farewell films. Mr. Kurosawa did “Rhapsody in August” — a very nice and gentle film. Would you close out your life with a nice and gentle film? 

You think I’m so ungentle? I don’t know if gentle is how I’d describe your sensibility. 

Fair enough. But even in “Natural Born Killers,” if you look closely there’s a tenderness there between Juliette and Woody. Or the Bush movie that I did, “W.”— at the end, it’s very tender with him and Laura. I know you’ve felt marginalized by Hollywood in the past. Do you still? 

I don’t think they think about me. I don’t feel bitter about it. “Savages” was my last movie in the mainstream, so to speak. I thought it was mainstream, and Universal did too, up until they distributed it. They decided to move it at the last second from fall to summer. So they put us in the middle of a schedule that was pretty tough. “Ted” was there. Remember that movie? It was hilarious. You don’t want to open against “Ted.” I do still get offered stuff, but I’m not inspired to make a movie. I don’t feel anything inside me, fire for going through that pain and misery. The last film I did was “Snowden.” It was so difficult to make. We struggled to get financing — I believe — because of the subject matter. But I’m still keeping my hand in with documentaries. I am working on two right now. One is on J.F.K. Since the film came out in 1991, there’s been quite a bit of new material revealed that people have basically ignored. It’s a hell of a story. “J.F.K.: Destiny Betrayed” is what we call it. Then I’m starting “A Bright Future,” which is about the benefits of clean energy, which includes nuclear energy. These are documentary subjects and aren’t necessarily going to be popular, but they’re important to me. Are you poking the hornet’s nest by going back to J.F.K.?

I’m not scared of that. I’m past that age. I don’t need to make a Hollywood movie. I don’t need to get the approval of the bosses.

Do you think you’ve made your last Hollywood film? 

I would have no problem doing another one, but I don’t feel it right now. Frankly, I did 20, and I got worn out. You had about a 10-year period, starting with “Salvador” and “Platoon” and going up to “Natural Born Killers” or “Nixon,” when your films felt like these major statements on the country and the culture. When that zeitgeist-y period ended, which it inevitably does for artists, did it change how you approached your work? 

I recognize the impact I had, but at the same time I enjoyed doing the films I did afterward. In 1999 I did “Any Given Sunday.” I get so much attention for that. “World Trade Center” was one of my most successful films financially. So the parade continued. The problem is in Hollywood. It’s just so expensive — the marketing. Everything has become too fragile, too sensitive. Hollywood now — you can’t make a film without a Covid adviser. You can’t make a film without a sensitivity counselor. It’s ridiculous. Why is that ridiculous? 

The Academy changes its mind every five, 10, two months about what it’s trying to keep up with. It’s politically correct [expletive], and it’s not a world I’m anxious to run out into. I’ve never seen it quite mad like this. It’s like an “Alice in Wonderland” tea party. In what respect? 

Oh, David, don’t go there. That’s going to be your headline. You know, I just read something about how films are going to be very expensive to make now, because you need to take all these precautions, and a 50-day shoot becomes a 60-day shoot, and social distancing for actors. That’s what I’m talking about.

Tell me more about your J.F.K. documentary. Is there a big revelation in it that you can share? 

I would be doing an injustice to say there’s one big one. There’s no smoking gun. It’s accretion of detail, David. Please watch the film when it’s out, and write me an email when you see it, and tell me if there’s cogency in it. Does it turn out that the bullet went back and to the right? 

We can make fun, but let me give you some quick points about what is in the documentary: There’s no chain of custody on the magic bullet, which is called CE-399. There’s also no chain of custody on this damn rifle, the Mannlicher-Carcano, which Lee Harvey Oswald was accused of shooting. I don’t want to go into the details, but we can’t account for who was in possession of the bullets and the rifle at various times. It’s a mess. Then we got more detail than ever showing that there was a huge back-of-the-head wound in Kennedy, which clearly indicates a shot from the front. It’s also clear that the autopsy from Bethesda, Md., was completely fraudulent. And there’s Vietnam. No historian can now honestly say that the Vietnam War was Kennedy’s child. That’s crucial. The last thing is the C.I.A. connection to Oswald. We have a stronger case, not only for post-Russia but also for pre-Russia. In other words, he was working with the C.I.A. before he went and when he came back. Those are the main points. I don’t want to criticize your paper, but if it was honest, it would be doing this work instead of just saying, “It’s all settled.”

But on some level you must know that we’ll never be able to tie up all the loose ends of the Kennedy assassination. So what do you want people to take away from your new work on this? 

Those who are interested will find it’s pretty clear that J.F.K. was murdered by forces that were powerful in our government. We point the finger at a couple of individuals. But I don’t want to get into that here. Now, why do I have to do this? I’m doing the documentary for the record so that you can see for yourself what the evidence is. That’s all. We’re just finishing it and beginning to show it. It will be out. Even if it’s on YouTube. Or in Transylvania.

So many of your movies, “J.F.K.” in particular, are about presenting counterevidence to the sort of officially sanctioned grand narratives that America tells about itself. Can you think of any areas where your belief in the importance of counternarratives might have been detrimental to your own political thinking? I’m thinking here about your series of interviews with Vladimir Putin, where it seemed that you were more interested in letting him lay out contrary perspectives to the popular American view of him rather than really challenging him on anything. 

I don’t think President Putin’s views from the 1999 period to the 2016 election period were ever presented honestly to the American public. The documentary is a great work of scholarship. It can be studied because he’s saying a tremendous amount that was fluffed off: “Oh, Oliver Stone is an apologist.” I’m not an apologist. I’m always probing, and that’s why he liked me to the degree that he did. He didn’t think I was a patsy. He was a very patient man. He reads. He prepares. He’s not like so many of our fool politicians, and that’s why he has lasted for 20 years. But the American press has demonized him. Even though he benefits from American destabilization and therefore tries to foment it? 

I don’t think he thinks that way. I think he sees American destabilization as a dangerous thing because he thinks about the safety of the world. If anything, he would like a balance of power to exist and he would like to have a nuclear treaty with us. It’s very difficult to talk when America doesn’t talk. It hasn’t been dealing honestly with him in a long time. Putin is obviously a canny politician. What do you suspect he believed he had to gain by talking with you? 

I think his intention, as he forthrightly says again and again in the documentary, was: Let’s talk. Let’s be mature. Let’s be adults in the room.

Could it have been something else maybe? There’s that term “the useful idiot.”

First of all, you should just look at the documentary.

I’ve seen it. 

Where is it clear that I’m an idiot? I think it’s a very articulate dialogue. I would also point out that when we started, which was in 2014 roughly, the relationship with the United States was not as bad as it would become. Things got much worse. In 2017, we went back to him, and you have on the record what he says about Donald Trump and the American election. I don’t think Russia has the desire or the money to spend on “destabilizing” an entire election. And how can you even compare it to what we’ve done in other countries? But two evils don’t have to be equal for them to both be evil. 

We’re getting too much onto Putin. That’s not in this book.

This is mostly related to the book: How present in your life is your experience in Vietnam? Is it still with you from day to day? 

It doesn’t disturb me. In the book I talk about everything that I felt over there and how strange it was. Vietnam influenced my work because of my feelings about war and peace in this country and militarization and where we are now. If I can do any good in this world, it would be to pass some of that message on to younger people so that they recognize where we’re going with continued militarization. But, no, the war doesn’t personally disturb me. I’ve reached an age of acceptance. I have a meta question for you: It seems, at least at this point in time, as though your political opinions have almost overshadowed your achievements as an artist. Does it bother you to think that your willingness to get into it about politics might ultimately obscure or distort your legacy as a filmmaker? 

I’ve negotiated my way, sometimes with great controversy, through life. My domain is wide. I enjoy give-and-take. I learn from people. I will continue not to run away from who I am. I’m going to own who I am.

-David Marchese, "Oliver Stone thinks Hollywood has gone crazy," The New York Times Magazine, July 10 2020 [x]

#oliver stone #The New York Times #david marchese #chasing the light #vladimir putin #jfk #a bright future #jfk: a destiny betrayed #the vietnam war #politics #hollywood #covid19

[weemsbotts]

The “Nefarious Marauder” Hiding in Dumfries!

By: Lisa Timmerman, Executive Director

Ready for a folk ballad involving a local Marine?

“When Morgan first came to this country, 

he came in a four-wheeled carriage. 

He put up at Parson Weem’s house 

and proposed to his daughter in marriage. 

The colonel had a nice gold watch, 

It hung at his right side. 

He gave it to Miss Fanny 

and his bulldog besides. 

Morgan, Morgan move along, you’re movin’ mighty slow. 

Morgan drank buttermilk, and Tansill drank the whey. 

So ride up Col. Morgan, while Tansill gains the day.”

In 1841, William D. Dowell wrote to Mr. William A. Hawley, editor of the newspaper Vermont Telegraph, regarding a reputable man in Dumfries. Dowell wrote, “This man Morgan came to this place last March & put up at a public house kept by a widow woman named Merchant where he remained perhaps two or three weeks & visited about with his fiddle.  He attracted the attention of several gentlemen who made him an associate. He then fell in company with Mr. Weems & his daughters at a meeting.” This fiddler notably liked the title “Captain Morgan” and had a trusty dog at his side – “…he had with him a tremendous dog which always followed him, this dog had a brass collar…” Morgan lodged with Jesse Weems at Somerfield, and Weems served as the administrator of Morgan’s estate when he died in 1840. Dowell noted “…he was what the Virginians sometime say a good looking man yet he looked to me suspicious & seemed restless.” While hindsight often clouds our perceptions, restless might have been an appropriate description of Morgan.

(Source: Vermont Telegraph, Volume XI, No. 21, 02/16/1839. Library of Congress: Chronicling America Historic American Newspapers)

This letter was part of a Chancery Court case regarding the property and money earned from the sale of Morgan’s inventory. While Morgan may have charmed Frances Weems and the residents of Dumfries with his fiddling (apparently Dumfries attracts fiddlers…note to self: look into that), the citizens of Vermont had discovered his duplicitous character. According to a series of letters published in the Vermont Telegraph (02/16/1839 and 02/20/1839), the “dancing master” Morgan married Jane Anson in 10/1835, but left the following year supposedly under “…the pretense of going to the house of Wm. Waltermyer, in the town of Milan…to play the violin, at a ball” and never returned. In 12/1838, Moses Swanzey inquired into the character of a dancing master named James Morgan in New York, “Mr. Morgan has a school at my house of great respectability; and since it has been in operation, some reports concerning his character, (of a damning nature to one of his profession)* have been circulated among us.” The Vermont Telegraph asked other newspapers to “…assist in putting the public generally on guard against a consummate villain – a nefarious marauder – who appears to live only to indulge his barest lusts, rioting on the affections of as many as he can deceive…degrading human nature, and subverting the institution of Heaven, which lie at the foundation of good society on earth.”  In 02/1839, S.K.P. responded to the Vermont Telegraph contradicting their claim that Morgan taught in Highgage.

Enter the Town of Dumfries! By 1840, Morgan had traveled through Dumfries to Richmond with a companion but returned to Dumfries after the death of his fellow traveler. Dowell speculated Dumfries was the perfect location as a “great many persons pass through this place from North & from the South”. Weems apparently liked Morgan enough to lodge him and become involved in the matters of Morgan’s estate when Morgan died in 1840. So where does Robert Tansill fit into this story? Frances Weems, Mason Locke Weems granddaughter (not daughter), married Robert Tansill in 1843. The Marine Corps Officers list from 1790-1900 noted Tansill as a Second Lieutenant on 11/03/1840, becoming a First Lieutenant in 1847, Captain in 1858, Brevet Captain in 1847 with a dismissal in 1861. He was court martialed in Florida in the early 1840s, but we will save his interesting biography for another post. Regardless, whether Tansill actively courted Ms. Weems before Morgan’s death is a fun speculation as this ballad has origins in some source.

(Source: Robert and Frances Tansill, Colorado College: Charles L. Tutt Library Digital CC, Robert Weems Tansill Family)

Lastly, besides for rhyming, why would Tansill’s notable characteristic be drinking whey and not buttermilk? Before the 20th century, buttermilk could be old milk that soured, the sour byproduct of churning sour milk or the byproduct of churning fresh milk. Today, our society embraces whey for supposed health benefits associated with whey proteins. It can be difficult to wade through the numerous articles regarding the modern use of whey, but we can throw back to “Little Miss Muffet” eating her “curds and whey” to see it was not an unfamiliar practice.

Note: There is still one spot left in our Ghost Walks: Return to the Shadows Tour at 7pm! Call and/or email to put your name on a waitlist – we may be able to offer a 9pm tour on some October weekends! Click here for more info about our popular Ghost Walks program – your participation helps support us throughout the year!

(HDVI Archival Records: MacDonald, Rick. Robert Tansill – Local Hero. Speech given to the Dumfries Historical Society, 09/01/1988; Turner, Ronald. James Morgan – Look Out for the Villain. Prince William County Virginia Books, 2004; PWC Clerk’s Loose Papers Volume VII Selected Transcripts 1833-1938, Transcribed by Ronald Turner; Library of Congress & National Humanities: Chronicling America Historic American Newspapers: 02/16/1839, Vermont Telegraph, Volume XI, No. 21 & 02/20/1839 Vermont Telegraph, Volume XI, No. 22; Naval History and Heritage Command: Officers of the Continental and U.S. Navy and Marine Corps 1775-1900; Anderson, L.V. Slate: Food: All Churned Around How Buttermilk Lost its Butter”)

#folklore #folkballads #localhistory #familystories #villian #museumfromhome #dancing #chancery #courtcase #destinationdumfries #princewilliamstrong #virginiahistory #marines #fiddler #americanhistory #buttermilk

[gayasianminimalist]

Dear Future Deanna,

You are about to go off to college, and afterwards starting your great big life. Therefore you may never see this message future Deanna. But I won’t lose hope because maybe you’ll have this with you without knowing it. Anyways, good luck in college, hope you make the most of it because you only get once chance in college. Make good choices, but at the same time take some risks or else you will forever regret not being bold. It’s okay if you make any mistakes because I’m sure you’ll learn from them and become better. And another thing future Deanna, live in the moment and don’t think too far ahead.

-Deanna Wong   June 1, 2015

Dear past Deanna,

Well 2 years later I managed to find this mini notebook and see what I wrote to myself awhile back. Past Deanna, I have certainly made some mistakes and done things I couldn’t imagine myself doing 2 years ago! I have met some of the most important people in my life these past couple years, especially this past school year. I hit the gym pretty often which is a very necessary thing in my life but I don’t exactly have access to a gym at the moment. I’ll make do this summer with @ home exercises and probably running in the mornings hopefully starting tomorrow. I  kind of hit a big wall at the end of my 1st year at UCSD, I failed 2 classes and passed with a B and I’m waiting to take the other class still. My gpa definitely tanked but now I have above a 3.0 again which is my goal gpa to maintain for the rest of my years here. I see my handwriting hasn’t changed too much so I’ve reached my max as far as writing legibility. I’m cleaning out my desk right now and there are definitely a lot of old Deanna history hidden in these drawings. Hmm so I’ve left my college journal at school, but I only wrote in it probably twice this whole school year. Way to keep record of what’s happening. So something that has definitely changed my life was starting my rave life. EDM really has had an impact on me and I decided to give ecstasy a go. It is quite the euphoria, but in great moderation. Gave me the happiest feeling in the world. I’m so glad my friends have been gracious enough to let me have this experience. So I’m not saying drugs are good, but they’re sure really fun. This past spring quarter I tried shrooms and that trip definitely gave me one of the weirdest days of my life. Everything just felt sort of off, but I saw everything a bit differently visually. And then more often than not I had those nights of being drunk, stoned, or crossed af. Like I knocked out pretty hard on some nights. Next year I definitely need some self control over these type of nights. IDK if my body can handle such tough treatment anymore. Anyways I joined a frat, and now I have 2 littles in my frat. They’re super cool but I need to find a way to connect all of us next year because they’re kinda polar opposites. I don’t wanna think about this too hard though so I’ll just continue on this much needed spheal. Also an update on my love life: non-existent. I’ve been single for a solid 20 years since I’ve been alive. Also I’m 20 what... how dis happen. Going off on a tangent, I think I have found that photos are very important to me. All the memories I have captured, I can’t even begin with how blessed I feel forever with such great memories. I would say my second year of college was definitely better than my first year. I wanna stop here past Deanna since I’ve given you the gist of my college thus far. Now to write to future Deanna again.

-Deanna Wong    July 12, 2017

Dear Future Deanna, 

So what past Deanna said, keep living in the moment, take lots of pictures, and make more new friends, but remember to keep your old ones. Maybe try dating someone before the end of college, or not but you need a person in your life I think, or maybe I’m wrong and it’s better that you’re independent all through college. Whatever happens, happens. Also keep living your healthy life, go gym, hike, eat right, and so on. And don’t feel so bad on not so good days, stress eating gets to everyone. Try to say no to people, you can’t be influenced all the time. Otherwise you’ll never learn to have things your way. You can be helpful to people too, but sometimes you should make sure you get your own shit together first. I think you have all the tools needed to succeed in the rest of college and life, so make your choices wisely.

-Deanna Wong   July 13, 2017

Dear past Deanna, 

I think I’ve gotten college life down, better than my first 2 years for sure. I still am making mistakes though, kind of had some bad incidents as far as my behavior record with UCSD, but on my way to fixing that. Nothing that’ll put me on hold for graduating, I just have to deal with business and this should all be over next quarter. Long story short I passed out at an on campus event and I have some consequences to deal with but it’s all on me, I have to fix things. On the bright side, everything in my academics are right again. Above a 3.0 and I am on track to graduate by next spring. It’s really hard to write into this tiny notebook. I’m writing very intensely I’m sweating a little. It’s also not the coolest temperature. Sacramento brings the heat. In terms of my social/party life, this past year of college, and within the last quarter, has exceeded my first 2 years. Well part of the reason has been because I turned 21 this year. Legal drinking is a whole new game. You would think I can control myself at this point, but I still can’t some nights. I’ve definitely opted out of drinking a lot more this year. Self-control is getting better. A lot of seniors I grew close to this year are graduated now. It makes me really sad but I need to learn to get through this year without them. They are all going on their own paths for the future, and I wish them all the best and to visit me next year! My love life got a little bit spicier this year, but nothing drastic happened where I need to announce it. Still no girlfriend and I really want to have one more and more. Still actively using dating apps. Well just more recently since its summer now and I don’t have much else to do. Just trying to recharge myself mentally. I think a lot of things that happened this year has given me a bit of a mental drain. I think i actually like attention but I may have gotten more than I need for a year. My 21st birthday is the most extra day I’ve had in my life. Everything was funny, everyone was dressed up, and there were a lot of gifts. The best thing was all my friends being there just to celebrate my friend Nat and I turning on year older. Like it shouldn’t be that huge of a deal, but it became a big deal just because we wanted it to be. This really should be more of advice for future me like the 2 past me’s, so I’m gonna do that instead of blabbing about my life. i’m supposed to do that somewhere else. Alright it’s there, peace past me.

-Deanna Wong   July 5, 2018

Dear Future Deanna,

Not sure what to say. Well if past Deanna has been able to accomplish all she has up to now, future Deanna can keep up this level of excelling life plus more. You’re literally about to enter the actual adult world after this year. You need to figure out your plan even if you don’t want to. You gotta make moves to get where you want. Such as staying home or moving out as soon as possible. Get a woman, it’s time to be more proactive about your love life because if you don’t make moves, no one’s gonna do it for you. Maybe tell people how you actually feel if you feel for them. Still have to take risks. I don’t think past Deanna has taken any REAL risks. Like a risk that makes you sweat and super anxious beforehand but could be very worth it. But you’ve always had a logical side, so maybe listen to it if it’ll make your life better in the long run. I’ll continue later but I have to eat first. You are your own grown ass adult now, speak up for what you want. You can’t let other people dictate your outcome of situations. Take control of you situation. Take control of your situation. Be a good friend. You’ve gotten better at it by leaps and bounds, but there’s always room for self-improvement. Be appreciative of how far you’ve come. Don’t beat yourself too much, you still tend to do this from time to time. Take your own advices? I don’t think you’ve had to apply this yet, but you could try giving yourself a few pointers. Keep yourself tidy. Clean your room more often when you’re at school. Things pile up, and a cleaner space tends to give you a clearer mind. Keep in touch with those you don’t see as often. You tend to spend all your time with one group of people instead of reaching out more. This is why you don’t see some people enough. Develop this skill now and it’ll translate in the future. I think I’ll keep it to this for now, you’ll gain more wisdom as you endeavor into your final months at UCSD. Stay lit, stay safe, and be you. :)

-Deanna Wong   7/30/18

This is just some back and forth between myself that I had for the first 3 years of my college life. I’ll save my last year for another post. I feel like between each year I had some improvements, but a lot of the stupid stuff I did more or less are from all my non-sober nights in college. It’s kind of the same thing over and over but just with different people and different circumstances. Looking back at everything now, I’ve really become a lot more of a stable person. I don’t regret a single moment of undergrad. Although I find it really strange I felt like I needed to have a girlfriend at some point. I honestly with so occupied with my own life that I really did not need to add someone else to the equation. And even now I’m still kind of ok with my independence, maybe a bit too ok with my independence. I think honestly the right person will just come at the right time. I really think I need to give the meeting someone in the real world a shot. Well not now since California is in a lockdown but after this pans over I’ll try to go out there and find the love of my life. 

Stay safe out there y’all and don’t go spreading too many germs. I’m out gonna be raving in my house haha.

[pynkhues]

Say Dean did give her the necklace. Out of all the horrendous things he’s done to her, why would she decide to wear it tho?

Well, assuming that he is the one to give her the new necklace, which Istrongly suspect he is (although I’ve been wrong before!), I think there are afew reasons she’d wear it. And hey! I’ve had five or six asks since 2.08about Beth and Dean’s relationship, history and age gap, which I had a fewdrafts of, so I’m so sorry! I’m going to highjack your ask to combine/answerthem all! Hope that’s okay. 

Putting all myheadcanons and theories aside (at least for the first half of this post haha),let’s just talk about what canon has established about Beth and Dean and theirrelationship over the last 18 episodes. 

This is like, verylong (seriously 2,800 words), haha, so I’m putting it under a cut to save all your feeds. 

The Marks’ Family ValuesWhile 2.08 clarified a few things about the way Beth, Ruby and Annie wereraised, there’s still a lot that we don’t really know, so let’s look at what wedo know: 

1. Beth as a youngteenager crashed her mother’s car out the front of Ruby’s house with her kidsister in the passenger seat because there was no food in the house, and theirmother wasn’t getting out of bed. The implication, from Annie’sdialogue “She just really likes it there” is that this is not a new thing.(2.08)

2. Annie was areckless kid and had a broken arm during a time it’s implied she and Beth were neglected.(2.08)

3. “You knowwhat my mama used to say? You get what you get and you don’t get upset.” – Beth(2.01)

4. Beth played pianofor six years after her parents dropped $$s on it, despite changing her mindand wanting to play violin, which on its own I think can be written off as generalchildish indecisiveness, buuuut I think means a little more than that in thecontext of everything else. (1.05)

5. Beth worked heronly legitimate job in highschool at the Dairy Queen. (1.03)

5. Annie used to gethigh and was sexually active in highschool, and had gossip/rumours spread abouther. Their mother came into the school to address it and, it’s implied, madethe situation a lot worse, causing Annie not want to do the same to Sadie with Sadie’sbullies. (1.04)

6. Then Annie gotpregnant in highschool. (mentioned multiple times)

7. Beth has alwaysbeen the one that Annie has called to bail her out of trouble (mentioned a fewtimes).

9. Beth had postpartumdepression with at least one of her children. (2.05)

The Boland Timeline

While we haven’t gottenconfirmed ages of the characters, we do know that Dean is, at the very least, ayear older than Beth, although I think it’s more likely around three yearsgiven the way it’s framed in the episode. SO. 

1. Beth meets Dean atschool when she’s either a freshman, sophomore or junior. He’s a senior. It’sat a point in time where we know her mother is bedridden and Beth spends a lotof time looking after Annie (she even took Annie to Ruby’s father’s funeral,which I think says a lot as to how much Beth – and by proxy Ruby – were lookingafter Annie). (2.08)

2. Beth and Dean havebeen married for 20 years during S1, so that puts them likely at gettingmarried when Beth is somewhere between the age of 20-22. (mentioned multipletimes)

3. Somewhere in thistime period, Dean takes over Boland Motors from his father (one of the photosin the screensaver Dean’s looking at in 2.04 looks like it’s from a grandre-opening, and Beth’s holding a baby boy, so it looks like this could bearound the time Kenny or Danny is born) and Beth becomes a stay-at-home motherand a housewife. Dean also has full control of their finances, and Beth is onan allowance that he also controls. 

4. Kenny has hiseleventh birthday in S1, so Beth would’ve been in her late twenties when shehad him. 

5. We don’t know theage gap between the rest of the kids (and in fact, those age gaps have obviouslychanged between S1 and S2 lol) but it looks like Jane is now the youngest, notEmma, and that Beth and Dean hadn’t had sex in the two years before gettingpregnant with Jane, and then that they hadn’t had sex since she was born until2.06, which seems to be about five or six years. (2.05 / 1.05)

6. Beth had postpartumdepression after at least Emma (it was the specific given reason as to why theyhadn’t had sex in the two years before getting pregnant with Jane), although Ithink the implication is that it was with more of the kids than just her.

7. Somewhere in allof this, Dean had multiple affairs. He says four, but the implication fromAmber is that it’s more than that, and then I think Beth basically confirmsthat when she says “Dean’s slept with half of Detroit” later in the episode.Plus Dean being a pathological liar isn’t exactly a secret. (2.05)

8. Beth finds out hesleeps with Amber in 1.01 and that he’s mortgaged their house three times andthat their savings are gone. She kicks him out, takes control of theirfinances, and robs Fine & Frugal. 

9. Dean tries to winher back a few times - first by appealing to her pragmatism (and I’ll beexpanding on this shortly) - by talking about how they’ll both be worse offfinancially if they separate - before telling her that she’s the love of hislife, then by showing up unannounced to mow the backyard (a traditionally malehousehold job), then by using Kenny’s birthday wish that they were backtogether to try and guilt her (another point I’ll be expanding on shortly!)

10. Cut to Kenny’sbirthday party. He implies Beth’s having an affair with Rio (lols for so manyreasons), they fight, Beth insinuates that she’ll be filing for divorce soon(”You’re still my wife” “Yeah, I’ve gotta get on that.”) and Dean drops TheCancer Lie. Beth is obviously upset, and lets him move back in, but he’ssleeping in Kenny’s room. (1.04)

11. Dean doubles down on the cancer lie by bribing a doctor to tell Bethhe has prostate cancer, but he also covers for her when Turnerfinds the Boland Motors car the girls stole from the lot. He then confronts herabout it in a very paternalistic way (”Why don’t you get a job?” “Sit down!”“These people prey on good, innocent people” “I’m sorry I yelled at you, buteverything’s going to be fine. I’ll take care of you.”). Beth plays along inthe moment, but Dean changes the locks without telling her (and also doesn’thelp her bring the grocery bags in which is sooo telling), reveals he’sswitched hours with a guy at work to be around to ‘protect’ her, and Bethfinally stands up for herself “You have no idea what I’ve done or even who Iam”. (1.06)

12. Dean asks her ifshe’s doing it for the kids. She says yes, and he says it’s all he needs toknow. It genuinely seems to comfort her in the moment. It’s one of their fewnice scenes and I think shows what they were like when they were at their verybest. (1.07)

13. Rio shuts down,Beth is back on an allowance. She tries to get a loan, but their credit hasn’trebounded enough and they still have too much debt. Dean solves the problem bymoving the botox via the doctor he bribed. Dean won’t tell Beth how he did it,but she’s grateful enough to end up coming clean about what she does for Rio.They have their second nice moment. “You don’t deserve anything I did toyou.” + “I think you’re incredible.” (1.08)

14. Dean obviouslyfeels like he and Beth are getting back on track, and is annoyed that Annie’sliving with them temporarily. He builds Beth a craft table with hiddencompartments to hide her fake cash! (1.09)

15. Dean tries toorganise something for their anniversary, which Beth doesn’t agree to rightaway, but does later in the episode when he tries to help her after realisingshit’s going down in the crime world. Dean gets into a car accident whilechecking out another woman, Beth finds out he lied about the cancer (like thatgrenade was never going to blow, Deansy), he came home, Rio shoots him to getback at Beth, but not before revealing a certain degree of intimacy and trustbetween the two of them, which Dean clocks instantly. (1.10 / 2.01)

Then Season 2happens, haha.

So let’s talk about Beth & Dean

I’ve said it a fewtimes before, but when it comes to Beth, we’re ultimately watching somebody whohas been disempowered and disenfranchised for a really, really long time tryingto reclaim a sense of identity and control over her life. Even before 2.08, wewere looking at that through the sense of her marriage to Dean where she had noreal independence. Her entire life was dictated by decisions that he made forthem, personally, professional and financially, and a lot of the first half of Season1 was devoted to her realising exactly how many of those decisions had been bad ones. As the series went on, she reallydid start to gain a sense of financial independence (which is incredibly important)as well as a sense of her own identity and agency, only for that to becompletely crippled again across that four episode arc - 1.09 through to 2.02 –firstly by thinking Rio had played her for a fool (the empty truck), then Rio firingher, then realising that Dean hadplayed her for a fool again (thecancer lie), and then her plot to put Rio away falling apart, Dean being shot,and her realising that she was newly indebted to both of them.

I think what 2.08contextualised was that Beth has never really been allowed to explore who sheis, because there’s always been somebody she’s had to look after. She’s alwayshad dependents and she has lived a life of constant compromise, making her incrediblypragmatic and sacrificing of her own needs and wants. The episode establishedthat Beth spent most if not all of her adolescence caring for Annie and theirmother, married young, and then spent her entire young adult life looking afterDean and their four children.

Likely the appeal ofDean was that he was older, gave her attention in a way that seemed to ‘see’ herat a time where her needs were neglected at home, and likely popular – he’s goofyand fun, as the show’s establishedmultiple times, which I think would be more likeable at that teenage age, and Ithink he probably appealed to Beth as a way out of a troubling home situation.At the end of the day, the show has established pretty firmly that Beth is, whenit comes to her and her own, a survivor. And when I say survivor, I don’t meanthe badass, action heroine sort of survivor - I mean the desperate, do-what-she-has-tosort of survivor. She has an uncanny ability to lie and perform to get herselfout of situations, and also a tendency to sacrifice her own happiness for thoseshe loves. I think when it came to Dean, for a very long time, Beth sacrificedpower and control for a security and safety that she hadn’t had growing up,first for herself (and likely in part for Annie too), and then for her fourchildren.

And I think Dean, priorto the start of the series, had never truly been challenged on any of thecontrol that he wrought over their lives. He’s your classic embodiment of whitemale privilege, and I think he has all the baggage that comes with that,including a firm belief in gender roles, a heady sense of entitlement, and asubconscious expectation that things will usually work in his favour. The factthat he started dating Beth when she was so young, that he inherited BolandMotors from his father, and the fact that he blames Beth’s postpartum depressionfor his affairs too I think drasticallyemphasises that. We talk a lot about the power play between Beth and Rio, butBeth and Dean, since 1.01, have been in a power play of their own – Beth in herdesire to break out of their traditional roles, to ‘steer the ship’, and toreally put her family in a more secure position in life (something she realisedDean was incapable of doing), and Dean in his desire to keep them in their traditional roles, to ‘steer the ship’, and tokeep the status quo (I mean, hell, the fact that he was checking out anotherwoman on his way to his anniversary dinner with Beth in 1.10 says a lot about exactly how little he wants things tochange).

In what is typical ofpeople who are nurturers/carers or have been forced into nurturer/carerpositions in their life, Beth also seems to feel guilt to a disproportionatedegree, and in a way that often seems to cancel out any other emotion,including her anger. This is established pretty early in season one in smallways - her snipping with Annie then immediately back pedalling when sherealises Annie might lose custody of Sadie, with not being able to throw Kennythe birthday party he wants, with her telling Dean about what she does for Rioafter Dean offloads the botox, and then reiterated in big ways this season -nursing Dean after he’s been shot, crawling into bed with Kenny after he gotcaught binge eating at school, going above and beyond to get the dubby backafter Jane feels neglected, I’d even argue that the whole situation with MaryPat has partially been fuelled by guilt for putting Mary Pat in that situationin the first place when she’s a widow with four young children.

And I think Dean knows this! He has guilted her so much across the course of this show, often in a way to deflectfrom his own shortcomings or to ultimately playher. He gaslights her all the time,and she often doesn’t even realise it, which demonstrates, to me at least, howoften he’s done it over the course of their 20+ year relationship. The wholething about the cancer lie in the first place was to back her into a corner,which he succeeded in doing. He guilted her about being at Boland Motors andaway from the kids. When Jane went missing, he immediately blamed her and guilted her for her involvement with Rio(instead of………you know……….looking for his daughter), in 2.08, he guilted Beth for checking on her moneybefore untying him after he’d tried to organise a hit on her partner and gottenher robbed blind in the process.

And when the guilt and the manipulation stopped working, he did thething he knew she couldn’t ignore (and that would hurt her the most) which istake the children. Beth is, like I said earlier, a survivor and a sacrificer whenit comes to her and her own. There’s no way she won’t give up everything togive those children what she didn’t have – a mother who she could rely on. I thinkDean’s ultimatum won’t just be about them either. I could be wrong, but I thinkhe’s going to tell her that they have to try again as a couple, and I thinkthat’s what that necklace is going to be about (seriously though, if he givesit to her as a part of the ultimatum, everything about it symbolically is acollar), and she’ll put it on for her children, and I think it’s all honestlygoing to push her over the edge in a really big way before the season’s over.

I’ve mentioned this in other posts, but I think Beth fully was intendingto leave Dean before the cancer lie, but then she needed to care for him(again, a manipulation I think Dean knew would work because of Beth’s historycaring for her mother and Annie), and then the shooting (same reason, plus theadded bonus of her having caused it). Since then, I think she has almostcompletely emotionally divorced him – having sex with Rio, taking over BM,checking on the money first, not letting him back into her bed – is all verytelling of this, and I think she had likely had her pragmatic hat on and waswaiting until she could feasibly balance all the pieces in her life on her ownbefore filing for divorce. Of course, that’s now blown up with Dean holding thechildren essentially hostage.

And look, do I thinkDean loves Beth? I do actually, in his own way. Do I think Beth loves Dean? Ithink she did, but like she said to Ruby – Dean’s not a soulmate for her, oreven a partner. Beth and Dean should’ve maybe briefly dated in highschool andthen broken up, but they’re both in too deep now, and I don’t think anythingshort of a bullet or an arrest is going to easily disentangle them.

#beth x dean #NBC Good Girls #speculation #gg 2.08 #gg 2.09 #welcome to my ama #character backgrounds #timelines #beth boland #dean boland #staying's worse than leaving #gg season 2

[boaws]

BOAWS Top Records of 2019

20 – Control Top – Covert Contracts (Get Better)

Sometimes you sit around and you try and think about what makes an album good or why you like it as much as you do and it's not entirely easy to narrow it down to one or two things. Usually there are some distinctive parts or sounds that strike me, but occasionally there are albums like Covert Contracts that bring together a number influences and pull them off quite nicely...and it just simply rips. I guess the three years between their debut EP and this first full-length were well spent refining whatever they were ingesting musically at the time, as what came out is a wild blast of post-punk that spans decades worth of sounds/eras that all fit along snugly next to one another on Convert Contracts. Is it going to reinvent the genre? Absolutely not. But is it kind of dance-able while also trying to smoothly hide that black eyeliner? Yup. It sure is. But it's also really good at doing it too. Control Top - Unapologetic (stream) BUY IT! 19 – Spotlights – Love & Decay (Ipecac)

Spotlights ride the fine line between post-metal and shoegaze, which I'm usually a little weary of because boy oh boy is there a lot of those bands and all those big riffs generally amount to a big old snoozefest. However, Spotlights caught my attention awhile back when their named popped up when playing alongside Hum on one of their many sporadic appearances. Turns out Spotlights weren't too shabby and their album Seismic was a bit of a winner too. They've since released their second album for Ipecac records and it takes the balance between the two aforementioned genres and toes that line even further. Love & Decay tweaks things a bit closer to the metal side of things, but still with some Midwestern flair and creativity in the realm of melody and definitely has the layers to appeal to the shoegaze crowd. Spotlights - Xerox (stream) BUY IT! 18 – Spit-Take – Falling Star (Dead Broke)

Spit-Take have been scattered around these pages plenty of times before, usually good for churning out two or three songs per release that make me appreciate them all that much more. Falling Star would mark their third full-length effort and it's about as consistent of a record that I've heard them release that sees them navigate though a pleasant balance of classic indie-rock/power-pop vibes while also throwing out some very Midwestern-ish clanky emo run throughs (“How”), which is usually always a good way to work your way into my memory. Short and sweet and available on both cassette and LP. Spit-Take - How (stream) BUY IT! 17 – VR Sex – Human Traffic Jam (Dais)

This is basically an alter ego of Andrew Clinco of Drab Majesty, wherein he typically goes by the alias of Deb Demure...here he opts for Noel Skum. I'm taking a guess that it's supposed to reflect the shift into a grimier/noisier side of the dreamy landscape that Drab Majesty typically inhabits. VR Sex contain much of the same undertones of something that Mr. Clinco would be associated with, remaining vastly catchy and rhythmic but now the game is a disassociated future where technology has apparently ruined society and now it gets darker, louder, and muddled in filth. Skum indeed. I'm not so sure the message is as conveyed as the presser would like one to believe, but I enjoy the tunes from a standpoint that it sounds like a slightly more modern Sisters of Mercy, Red Lorry Yellow Lorry or something along those lines. Not bad. I guess Human Traffic Jam will gain another level of appreciation years from now if it ends up hitting the nail on the head and we do in fact find ourselves in some type of Black Mirror episode. VR Sex - Sacred Limousine (stream) BUY IT! 16 – Cave In – Final Transmission (Hydrahead)

The trajectory for Cave In over the years has been one of the more interesting ones. Once a premier metalcore/hardcore band, they pulled the rug out from just about everyone and released their second album Jupiter, which sounded nearly like a different band...showcasing big hooks, melodies, and definitely a large infatuation with space-rock themes. I naturally loved it and was actually kind of excited for some reason when I saw that they had landed on a major label for their third album Antenna. Sadly it didn't go as planned and it was pretty much over after that album came and went without moving the needle a whole lot. Fast forward a handful of years following major label disappointment, the band suffers the tragic loss of bassist Caleb Scofield. The band had been in the process of recording/demoing for their first album in 8 years up until the point of his death and the recordings on Final Transmission are a collection of those. Andrew Schneider and James Plotkin did a nice job in smoothing out some of the rougher edges around what were mostly unfinished recordings, cause honestly I can't really tell in most places and the songs stand on their own for the most part. Final Transmission is, or likely would have been, an album that plants itself right in between Jupiter and Antenna, circling back to some of the spacey atmosphere and guitar tones that fed greatly into both of those albums sound. Possibly the album they would have made if RCA hadn't come knocking? Although it's unknown to me whether this is an actual final statement for the band, if it does indeed end up being that, it's a good'n. Cave In - Night Crawler (stream) BUY IT! 15 – The Bismarck – We Will Never Be Young Again (Self-Released)

The Bismarck have been around long enough to still have an actual website that hasn't been updated in years. As someone who still pays yearly hosting costs for some dumb reason and haven't quite convinced myself not to anymore, I guess I get it...but I know that's gotta be costly. The band is firmly in the PRF rock stable of bands, so that right there should give most of you an idea of what The Bismarck bring to the table. Over a run of what I think is five albums now, We Will Never Be Young Again seems to be an album that wants to prove defiant of its title, coming with full fire and energy and holy shit...anthems? Yeah. A song title like “Fuck You, Let's Boogie” certainly seems like something you could easily write off, but ends up being a bona fide gem of a tune. Solid album all the away around and if it ends up being to your liking, they have a rather deep catalog to pull from if curiosity strikes. The Bismarck - Fuck You, Let's Boogie (stream) BUY IT! 14 – Crumb – Jinx (Self-Released)

First album for the Brooklyn based Crumb and I'd thought I'd heard an EP or something before this, but upon further research, it would appear I hadn't. This introduction is fine enough anyway, wherein they combine that niche of slacker ethos that worked its way through a number of indie bands in the 90's and spin it with a chilled loungy/psych thing. Maybe a tinge of jazz influence here and there, but more or less it sticks to the poppy psych side of it all, leaving for a very breezy and smooth 28 minutes of music. The ambiance, or I guess mood, of Jinx is pretty heavy throughout, likely forcing the album to be something that is relegated to particular times of which it strikes just right, however when it does...it certainly works. Crumb - The Letter (stream) BUY IT! 13 – Razorlegs – Skip Skool (Self-Released)

Latest cassette from this improvisational noise/psych outfit, each side consisting of its own roughly 18 minute long descent into fuzz, pummel and blown amps. Side one is “Transistor Love” and gets things going with a rapid paced drum explosion that contends to outpace the entirety of the track, leaving me seemingly off balance for the duration. There are faint voices coming and going as the track progresses into its squalls of feedback and I'm left to envision that this is to mimic the joys of still using the radio dial (FM mute OFF...no cheaters) and then it promptly ends...picking back up with another steady drum beat that steers pretty much the rest of the track from one critical guitar injury to another. Flip the tape, you have “Skip Skool” and we're off with a death march of drums and the sputtering flare ups of distortion before turning into a full fledged burnt out psych mantra, sounding like it's trying to rip and tear its way off the tape that it was laid on to. Razorlegs - Transistor Love (stream) BUY IT! 12 – Breastmilk – Bliss (Chicago Research)

Chicago Research put out a variety of things this past year that I thought were all very solid in their own uniquely bleak and disturbing way, however Breastmilk kind of wins out of for things to play in the background if you genuinely want someone to be creeped out while being in your house. An interesting take on downtempo, that reaches its grimy fingers into the same head spaces of Throbbing Gristle, Nurse With Wound or the likes. An ebb and flowing bass churn scrapes along for 18 minutes of whatever hellscape this may be, the opener “Transient” using a ring-back tone to voicemail sample to unnerving ability. Not to mention a woman sobbing to the background of glass shattering and various other noises on “Jesus Piece”. Breastmilk provides the soundtrack for the horror, however part of the fun of Bliss is the open ended scenarios of whom and what it's playing for... Breastmilk - Transient (stream) BUY IT! 11 – HTRK – Venus in Leo (Ghostly International)

It sure doesn't feel like it's been roughly five years since HTRK released the excellent Psychic 9-5 Club, but that's the case. Following the death of co-founding member Sean Stewart, HTRK continued forward as a duo and have seen their sound venture further into the electronic world; relinquishing the heavy low end found on early recordings while cold pulses of bass and synth have since flooded over. Remaining consistent has been Jonnine Standish's vocal presence throughout, one that dictates the miscues, misery and loneliness in hushed breathy swoops. On their fourth effort, Venus in Leo, Standish and guitarist Nigel Yang return to the same nighttime introspection of regret, however with Yang's shimmering guitars coming back into play more so than we've heard in quite a while...fading in and out of the background. I kind of miss the heavy minimalism, almost deep-house vibe, that Psychic 9-5 Club had...but melancholy plays out in many different ways...and Venus in Leo seems to be the way HTRK wanted to tackle it this time. No matter, it's still immensely enjoyable. HTRK - Dream Symbol (stream) BUY IT! 10 – Jessica Pratt – Quiet Signs (Drag City)

Funny note, Quiet Signs was one of the first albums of 2019 that I really liked and accordingly I included one of the tunes from it on that respective months mix. My now fiance listened to it and then sent me a picture of the name of the song that was on and simply said “hate this”. Noted. It's OK though, we still love each other. How could you hate something as serene as Quiet Signs? Anyway, Jessica Pratt has been honing in her sound for several years now and took the plunge with her third album to record in a proper studio, which resulted in an album that sounds really far removed from being recorded in a proper studio oddly enough. The sparseness in instrumentation and the dreamlike echoes of Pratt's voice feel like both are in the same room with you, but still somehow a million miles away...or if that I'm not careful enough the whole thing will disappear entirely. It's the indescribable feeling of distance and brief lapses of clarity that make Quiet Signs so beautiful sounding. It comes and goes all too quick however, so I'll be anxiously awaiting the next appearance from Jessica Pratt. Jessica Pratt - This Time Around (stream) BUY IT! 09 – Notches – New Kind of Love (Dead Broke / Salinas)

Was blown away by Notches and their debut record High Speed Crimes around three or so years ago. It was pretty much everything I could ask for in a pop/punk record, bringing plenty of fuzz/distortion and a heaping fuck ton of melody. While New Kind of Love doesn't necessarily register on that same scale with me, it's still a fantastic record from a band that continues to peel off some of the catchiest material within the genre. It being the bands third album and all, it's kind of fun noticing them “growing older” of sorts and moving away from the turned up to “11” mindset. It's about the song now man, I mean it's always been I'm sure, but now it's no longer buried underneath a sheet of distortion. Can't blame them. I entered my listening to public talk radio in the car phase of my life here not too long. Totally feel ya. Give these guys a listen please. Notches - Funny How (stream) BUY IT! 08 – Dry Cleaning – Boundary Road Snacks and Drinks (It's OK)

From the opener “Dog Proposal” Dry Cleaning establishes very quickly that Boundary Road Snacks and Drinks is exhausting. I don't mean that in the negative sense either. The second EP from the UK based post-punk group is merely informing all of you out there that life is just extra fucking exhausting. Because it most certainly is. Singer Florence Shaw takes the six songs on this EP and crams so much of our current day-to-day nonsense in it that I'm basically getting an anxiety attack listening to this sucker. However, the honesty is appreciated and the contradicting jauntiness of some of these tunes is an excellent way to remind that no matter how tired I am that everything else is going to keep rolling as it always has. While there are much bigger issues at hand that Dry Cleaning tackle throughout, it's the debilitation of everything as a whole that Boundary Road Snacks and Drinks really conveys the most. After two excellent samplings from the band, it's pretty terrifying to think of the destruction on my nerves that they could cause with a full-length. Time will hopefully tell. Dry Cleaning - Viking Hair (stream) BUY IT! 07 – Kim Gordon – No Home Record (Matador)

It had never really occurred to me that Kim Gordon had never released a solo album up until this point of her lengthy career. I was kind of blown away by that to be honest. I guess it's just that Thurston Moore seems to fart one out here and there, so I'd assumed Gordon had done the same. However, as it stands, No Home Record is Kim Gordon's first solo effort and completely took me by surprise. Maybe I'd expected it to sound much like her material in Body/Head? I don't know. Or for it to be closer threaded to Sonic Youth? That's unfair, I know, but it is what it is. The good deal is that No Home Record is completely left field of about anything I expected; that takes equal parts no-wave and drags it through the glitch/industrial minefield. Gordon's voice fits right in with it all, adding to the instability and jarring nature of practically everything on this record. I'd never thought I would have wished for a Kim Gordon experimental electronica record, but it's 2020 baby and things are apparently really fucking different now. Fantastic stuff. Kim Gordon - Don't Play It (stream) BUY IT! 06 – Joshua Abrams Natural Information Society – Mandatory Reality (Eremite)

I somehow wish I could have this album playing practically the entire time I'm at work (it's almost long enough), but unfortunately my boss sits perched only a mere few feet away from me to ensure that maximum stress is achieved. Joshua Abrams and the NIC have created an absolutely astonishing collection of work on Mandatory Reality that is likely easier to zone out to than to deliberately ignore. You'll want to, because wherever Mandatory Reality exists, the grass is most certainly greener and I'm frantically waving my ticket to hop aboard whatever space-age craft is going to take me there at any given time. But really more to the actual music, Joshua Abrams and the NIC have laid out 4 slow moving, borderline minimalist, pieces of avant-garde jazz that sooth and calm the bludgeoning attempts of our actual mandatory reality sometimes. It's pretty brilliant and perfectly recorded/captured by Greg Norman. Played on a proper stereo, it's a variety of nuanced sound that demands repeated listens simply on that alone. Joshua Abrams Natural Information Society - Shadow Conductor (stream) BUY IT! 05 – 55 Deltic – You Could Own an American Home (Kingfisher Bluez / Strictly No Capital Letters / Barely Regal)

I love the title of this record so much, because here sometime in the next year we're going to have to start looking for a house and having been through this rodeo once before...I know how utterly dreary that's going to be. The only fun part about it right now, is the non serious part where I'm just cruising Zillow listings at work and seeing the inside of all these cool houses I can't afford. And what better of an idea to center an emo/slowcore record around? In actuality I'm pretty positive that's not what 55 Deltic are even remotely channeling here, but I would imagine there is a definite longing/nostalgia for a time when working towards a successful future was something not increasingly hard to obtain. The songs on You Could Own an American Home weigh heavily through a slow but sturdy pace, that lines up well with bands like Bedhead or Codeine, who both seemed to pull at a lot of the same strings that 55 Deltic are equally bummed out about no longer being commonplace in society. Really enjoyed this one, as it touches upon a lot of the aspects I like about the genre and isn't afraid of getting a little raucous here and there. 55 Deltic - Tangen (stream) BUY IT! 04 – Cherubs – Immaculada High (Relapse)

I guess the rumor of Cherubs signing to Relapse finally came true...albeit for their second album, fourth overall. Not sure why that took so long, but whatever...here we are...Cherubs consuming roster space on the same label that I remember receiving some pretty wild catalogs from years and years ago and lots and lots of pretty bad cover art. Or really good cover art if you were into grindcore. Either way. I guess it makes sense, Cherubs were, and are, fairly extreme in the realms of the noise-rock world, being a band that released one of the true classics in Heroin Man. When they got back together, there was a level of fear that the burden of having to follow that sucker up would be a bit hard to do, but 2 Ynfynyty wiped away any concern of that as I foolishly had mistaken the band as a group of people that would even remotely worry about something like that. The album ended up being nothing short of amazing and sounded like a band that had a little regard as to what they “should” sound like and just made a record that they wanted to. They returned this past year with Immaculada High and did exactly the same thing, producing a record that isn't simply a repeat and pushes their sonic explorations of marrying noise/melody even further into the grandiose murkiness. At this point, I'm calling it good. I mean, this is two more Cherubs albums than I ever thought I would get already, so I'm not really willing to push my luck here. However, if more is to come...then I'm here for it. Cherubs - Full Regalia (stream) BUY IT! 03 – Clear Gash – Replenish (Iniquity)

Knew nothing of Clear Gash when listening to Replenish and still know nothing about Clear Gash. They are from Germany and apparently have a very sparse web presence other than releasing this album on Iniquity Records, which have graciously provided it on their Bandcamp site or in the form of a....CD? Beggars can't be choosers I guess and at least Replenish got out there one way or another. Clear Gash are a bit of an oddity in this day and age, as there just aren't too many people out there really trying to bring murky moodiness of grunge back to the forefront, however that's not too far from what they are attempting on their debut (I'm assuming?) album. It's fuzzy, down tuned and pretty filthy sounding stuff. The interesting part is that they are taking the tone/sound and partially playing it like slowed down hardcore. Odd, but it jams sure enough. The production almost lends a bit of a raw Born Annoying/Strap it On era feel, which is definitely appealing to me. Replenish rips and is a distorted mess of riffage that has sorely gone missing in the past couple or so years for some reason or another. Clear Gash - Ode to Discrepency (stream) BUY IT! 02 – USA/Mexico – Matamoros (12XU / Riot Season)

Considering the players involved that make up USA/Mexico, I would be really really bummed/surprised if they managed to put out a record that was crap. It just doesn't seem possible when bringing together members of Butthole Surfers, Shit & Shine and When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth...three very very fine purveyors of completely fried and distinctive noise-rock. So, it's relatively safe to say that Matamoros falls within that same realm of noise and dives deep into the red at the drop of the needle with the title track opener and spots some extra guitar ugliness from Spray Paint member George Dishner, which seems ridiculous that an extra amount of mangled feedback would seem necessary...but listening to Matamoros one gets the sense these fellas operate in a world unbeknownst of limitations. This then segues right into a grossly heavy cover of Cherubs' “Shoofly” with guest vocals by Mr. Kevin Whitley himself. Even he can't really crawl above the heaping amounts of distortion that USA/Mexico uncompromisingly continue to pour on, as his voice is repeatedly swallowed up by the mass. Matamoros carries on much in the same manner for it's duration. “Vaporwave Headache” cranks up the RPM's some and rips through two and a half of minutes of chugging maxed feedback and alien vocals as a possible representation of a vapor wave song if it were dubbed over on the same cassette roughly 400 times and then played at five times the speed. In the end, Matamoros greatly out performs the bands debut Laredo and is essentially the exact product of which could be expected through this collaboration of sorts. Well worth the risk of potential hearing loss. USA/Mexico - Matamoros (stream) BUY IT! 01 – Possible Humans – Everybody Split (Hobbies Galore / Trouble in Mind)

Yeah, this is my kind of thing. I'll never shy away from bands that want to continue hoisting that Homestead/Flying Nun flag and pumping out those type of jams. Possible Humans have apparently been lurking around Melbourne for a handful of years now, playing shows...etc. However, just towards the beginning of last year put out their first full-length through Hobbies Galore and it's been nice to see it gain some traction over the past few months. Enough so that Trouble in Mind picked up the record after the initial pressing of 200 sold out lightning quick. I got hooked after hearing the sprawling psych flavored “Born Stoned”, which despite being eleven minutes long it makes good on every single second of it, masterfully combining the Homestead or Athens sound with something that could have been an absolutely smoking Blue Oyster Cult deep cut. It quite simply rules and will undoubtedly be the best track I hear for a very long time. Definitely not trying to sell the rest of the album short, because Everybody Split is front to back a fantastic listen and piece of work that encapsulates a general feel/sound so well. If you haven't heard it yet, please make this one a priority. Possible Humans - Born Stoned (stream) BUY IT!

#top20 #bestof

[fortunatelylori]

Hi! I’m new to your blog so forgive if this had been asked before...but what makes you think Jon is using Dany? I haven’t read the books, so is maybe there an indicator I’m missing?

Hey, nonnie!

No worries … I find it pretty difficult to explain at this point why I think Jon is using D*ny because I’m so used to the political Jon theory and it’s such an amalgamation of points, evidence and sound analysis that I could probably talk about it for 2 days straight without repeating myself. But I’ll give it a shot and try to keep it as brief as I can. :) 

FYI, you don’t have to read the books in order to see the sense of this theory. All you need to do is engage with the show material in a more judicious way and not expect the narrative to spoon feed you plot points, which many people do, particularly when it comes to D*ny’s story line. 

Now, no introductory course into Political Jon is complete without the excellent metas by @thelawyerthatwaspromised so I’m going to include a few links here for your convenience: 

https://thelawyerthatwaspromised.tumblr.com/post/178471892596/tinfoil-jons-two-huge-lies

https://thelawyerthatwaspromised.tumblr.com/post/174814148886/how-jon-completely-took-control-of-dany-in-season

https://thelawyerthatwaspromised.tumblr.com/post/176008185561/gots-pov-trap-the-anatomy-of-betrayal-and-why

@thelawyerthatwaspromised has written extensively about this subject so if you want to delve deeper, I highly recommend a through look on her blog. 

From what I gather from your ask, you don’t see the clues season 7 set up for Jon using D*ny. What I’m going to suggest to you is that the reason why you don’t see them is not because they’re not there but because of the way that D*ny’s narrative has been handled so far. D*ny, up until this point in the story, has paid no price for all that she’s accumulated, she’s faced no consequences for her actions and suffered little to no losses since the end of season 1. This has lulled the audience into thinking that D*ny will always get what she wants, in exactly the manner she wants it and as such they have felt extremely comfortable in suspending their critical thinking when it comes to her actions or how she fits into the larger scope of the Game of Thrones universe. 

In a story where every single character ONLY gains something by losing something important or making huge, personal sacrifices or compromises, D*ny faces only momentarily set-backs that are easily resolved by the plot if not in the same episode where the problem arises then by the end of the season. 

In a realistic show about the ruthlessness of medieval society, where people play the game of thrones or they die, D*ny is stuck in a Dungeons & Dragons role play set on the easiest difficulty. 

Just look at a few of the things D*ny has been allowed to get away with/get out of with little to no consequences: 

- she’s stuck in the desert, she wants access to Qarth, she threatens a bunch of people, gets access to the city

- her Qarth supporter betrays her - she locks him up in his own vault together with her traitorous handmaiden, plunders his home and leaves Qarth unharmed - no one bats an eyelash to the fact that she locked two people in a vault where they would slowly suffocate/starve to death, not in the narrative or outside of it; 

- while in Qarth, she has her dragons stolen by some extremely powerful wizards - has a walk through their temple, burns the wizard alive and the temple in the process, leaves intact and with all 3 of her dragons - no one in Qarth has any issues with the fact that she just burned one of their temples down

- she needs an army - tricks the Unsullied master, steals the Unsullied, orders them to decimate anyone above the age of 12 - triumphant music plays through out; forget the fact that she’s just got the Unsullied she wanted, is planning on using them in the same way their master did or the fact that she begins her anti-slavery campaign essentially because she has no money to pay for an army, everyone and their mother is hailing D*ny as a hybrid Nelson Mandela/Martin Luther King/Lincoln figure. 

- Yunkai hires the Second Sons to defend the city against D*ny - Daario takes one look at her and betrays his associates and hands her Yunkai on a silver platter - he also bends the knee - again, D*ny loses absolutely nothing of any importance in all of this nor does she need to compromise or sacrifice

- Meereen wants hand to hand combat - Daario wins - D*ny takes the city and installs herself as Queen of Meereen within the same episode

- she crucifies 163 people, some innocent, without a trial - the Sons of the Harpy are born - she loses Barristan Selmy (he’ll be shortly replaced by Tyrion so no worries) but aside from that not much else happens

- she kills an exslave without a trial - Mysha is a master appears - where did this plot point go? who cares? D*ny is winning! Get with the program

- the Sons of the Harpy attack the Fighting Pits - Drogon comes to rescue her - she leaves her city and her team in danger and flies off - not one of her advisers are angry, dissapointed or feel betrayed by the fact that she abandons them; in fact Jorah and Daario are off to rescue her while Tyrion holds the city for her; Grey Worm and Missandei are pinning for her as if she’s their freaking mother. 

- D*ny gets captured by the Dothraki - oh, no! looks like she’s in trouble now - no worries! within two measly episodes, she burns the Khals and Vaes Dothrak down, unites all the khalasars, convinces them to go with her to Westeros and has now full control of Drogon - Yay! Are we having fun yet? 

In contrast, let’s look at a few of the journeys of other characters, shall we? 

Cersei: 

- wants to get rid of Maergery and take control of Tommen - she makes a deal with the High Sparrow - gets imprisoned - forced to walk naked through the streets - no one wants to deal with her, her own son outlaws trial by combat essentially condemning her to death - she blows up the Scept of Baelor - Forget the fact that Cersei goes through hell before she ultimately gains her victory. Even that is undercut by her last living child killing himself as a direct consequence of her actions. That’s quite the price to pay.

Jon:  

- Jon manages a huge win when he makes a deal with Tormund and decides to allow the Wildlings past the wall and away from the WW - he gets allies against the army of the dead and does something truly revolutionary without killing anyone or forcing them to do something against their will - they go to Hardhome to save the wildlings - the WW attack, he doesn’t manage to save them all - For all his troubles, Jon gets killed by his own brothers in arms. Jon gets punished by the narrative for being forward thinking and wanting to help people. Cool …

Arya: 

- decides to go to Braavos, trusting in the word of Jaquen and gets tricked into joining a death cult that wants to strip her of her identity and use her as a killing machine - she is blinded and starving on the streets - she escapes only after almost dying 

Sansa: 

- decides to trust the Tyrells and not run off with LF - she is forced to marry Tyrion - finally manages to escape KL - ends up in the Vale with a crazy, murderous aunt - wants to avenge her family - ends up married to Ramsay Bolton, raped and tortured - barely escapes human flesh eating hounds. 

So all the characters in this show pay dearly for each and every win they have, are punished by the narrative for their decisions, except D*ny. She looks downright invincible. Her longest running issue is the Sons of the Harpy and the slavers of Yunkai/Astapor/Volantis plotting against her and let’s look at how that gets resolved: 

She arrives with her Khalasar who decimate the Sons of the Harpy in one fell swoop - she hops on Drogon and burns the slavers fleet and kills 2 of their leaders essentially ending the conflict - ends the episode acquiring 3 Westerosi allies and more ships to take her armies over the Narrow Sea. 

You could argue she needs to give up Daario to go to Westeros but even that is not a true sacrifice because she says she felt nothing in leaving him and was eager to get it over with. 

All of this takes maximum 20 minutes to resolve. 

And it’s in direct contrast with the Battle of the Bastards that occurs in the same episode: 

- Jon and Sansa manage to get back Winterfell and the episode ends with the Direwolf banner flying on top of the castle once again; Sansa kills her abuser, Ramsay - Yay! 

Except … Another Stark is dead: Rickon; Jon abandons his battle plan, almost loses the battle, many good men lose their lives, including Wun Wun, the last of the giants, who sacrifices himself in order for the Starks to get inside the castle. They’re only saved because the Knights of the Vale intervene and in order to get them there, Sansa has to allow LF back into her life - Price paid, sacrifices made, Jon literally almost getting trampled to death. 

On the one side, you have a plot where people struggle and almost die/actually die, on the other side you have a paint by numbers plot where a character just gains and gains without any consequences. 

Doesn’t it seem fishy to you? Doesn’t it feel like the pin must drop for D*ny at some point if her story is to make any semblance of sense? 

What other reason could a show like GOT have to build a character like D*ny to the degree they have if not to tear her down and take everything from her in the end? This is not a show that makes anything easy or nice for its characters and the only reasonable candidate for the taking down of D*ny is Jon, for several narrative reasons: 

“When a Targareyen is born, the Gods flip a coin” - this has been brought up in the show not once but twice, by Cersei and Pycelle. We have two Targs left and they’re being set-up as foils since season 1. If you think this ends with Jon and D*ny happily married, bringing back the Targ dynasty and having sex on Drogon’s back for the rest of time, you haven’t been paying attention. 

Where D*ny bends people to her will, where she threatens and burns her enemies alive, Jon favors collaboration and mercy; where D*ny is hailed as Myhsa and carried on the backs of former slaves, Jon struggles to reach the surface in a crowd that is trampling him to death; where D*ny conquers, Jon convinces people to elect him; where D*ny thinks of herself as the Mother of Dragons, Breaker of chains, Jon Snow feels uncomfortable even talking about the fact that he was brought back from the dead. 

“You have to be smarter than father, you have to be smarter than Robb” - two other Stark men traveled to the South and both got killed because they couldn’t play the Game of Thrones; Jon gets tricked into going to Dragonstone but he somehow survives because he fell in love? Not very likely. Not only that but Jon gives up his crown and his country’s independence and you expect him to pay no price for that? 

Here’s the thing about political Jon. People misinterpret this as an outrageous claim that Jon is acting like Littlefinger and thus against character. But that’s not what pol Jon is. Pol Jon is a huge sacrifice Jon makes where he compromises his integrity and standing in front of his people, endangers the love and support of his family, gives up his crown and resorts to using his own body as leverage in order to save his country and his people from the apocalypse. 

He was already involved in this kind of plot before: Remember the plot where Jon had to infiltrate the Wildling camp as a spy, kill one of his black brothers in order to gain their favor, have sex with Ygritte so she continues to vouch for him and ends up betraying all of them and upholding his NW vows? Because I do. Jon has been a spy before, Jon has used people before. Jon was not blinded by love into giving up his values and everything of importance to him in exchange for cave sex/b0atbang. 

As for a repeat of Jon/Ygritte, I would say not likely. I have already dissected the Jon/D*ny relationship on my blog ( Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4). Part 5 of the series was taken down because Tumblr is more offended by the outline of Jon’s butt than actual Nazis and porn bots but I’ll re upload it, hopefully soon. I’m not in the habit of linking my own stuff but I go into a lot of detail there which I’m not able to provide in this answer. Suffice it to say that the narrative undercuts the Jon/D*ny romance at every turn, we’re cut from Jon’s POV through out his stay on Dragonstone and he’s cold and standoffish with her in a way he never was with Ygritte. 

A 3rd twist in the story is coming - GRRM has said that this story will contain three major twists: one was the burning of Shrieen, the second was the reveal of Hodor’s name (which links back to the abomination of Bran warging a human being). The last one happens at the end of this story, and is, as of yet,unrevealed. Everyone is speculating about what this twist will be and the options are getting more and more fantastical by the day. Most of the people speculating, though, haven’t touched upon the most obvious answer which is: Dark D*ny and a Dance of Dragons 2.0. 

It isn’t that the narrative hasn’t given people enough clues that D*ny is turning dark but because of the way that her plot has been handled, it has lulled the audience into believing that all these clues don’t matter. I would argue that at the end of season 1 people entered a symbolic pact with the devil when they glossed over D*ny executing Mirri Maz Duur and since then D*ny’s level of violence has only exacerbated. A point in the narrative will come when she won’t be able to get away with the “it’s necessary” argument any longer. And when that happens, the only person that can oppose her is Jon. Further supported by the fact that … take it away Bran: 

He was never a bastard. He’s the heir to the Iron Throne. 

So if he’s in love with her and willing to give up everything for her, even after she takes him prisoner, uses the lives of his people as a bargaining chip for him bending the knee, and still vacillates on her commitment to the cause after he’s bent the knee (”I can’t forget what I saw beyond the wall and I can’t pretend that Cersei won’t take back half the country when I’m gone), then how the hell is he going to end up stealing a dragon and fighting against her? 

Those are the main narrative reasons why political Jon is plausible and viable and leads directly into the Dark D*ny endgame. 

Now, because of the way season 7 played out, I sort of understand why people think it’s just business as usual. After all, doesn’t Jon go through the same sort of arc in relation to D*ny that Daario and Tyrion already have?

Daario first encounters D*ny, takes a fancy to her, betrays his Second Sons partners and fully commits to her within the same episode.

Tyrion travels across Essos expressing doubts that the Mother of Dragons, Breaker of Chains is all that she’s cracked out to be, has one conversation with D*ny and suddenly all those questions fly out the window and he now “believes”in her and is fully on board with her invasion of Westeros. 

By that logic, of course, Jon comes to Dragonstone, expresses doubts about D*ny, refuses to bend the knee but then over the course of the story, he changes his mind, bends the knee and is now fully committed to D*ny’s cause. Except that Jon is neither a blood thirsty mercenary like Daario nor is he in love with staying relevant within the Game of Thrones, like Tyrion. Jon has always put the North, his values and his Stark family above all his personal ambitions. Why would D*ny succeed in changing Jon, when Ygritte couldn’t?

The narrative has already switched the tables on D*ny by handing her more defeats in season 7 than she’s experienced in 5 seasons but people assume that this too is just a minor set back. But it isn’t. 

At the end of this story line, Jon Snow, the secret Targareyen, the heir to the Iron Throne, the bastard Stark and the shield that guards the realms of men is waiting for her. And that Jon Snow can’t be a cinnamon roll, he can’t be a Northern fool in love with a pretty lady with dragons. He needs to be political Jon because: 

In the Game of Thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground. 

Thanks for the ask!

#anti-daenerys #anti-jonerys #political jon

[hockeyplayerstories]

Auston Matthews | Something Like Romeo And Juliet

Fun fact: I had written this for English class before I decided I'd post it but not before editing.

Auston’s P.O.V

I stare from afar, with warm ups just starting, there was barely anyone in the stands but from the people already seated only one or two were wearing Maple Leaf jerseys the rest were Red Wings fans. From across my teams zone, where I am currently stretching on the ice, through the glass I spot a beautiful girl. She is wearing a red wings jersey but I don’t care to much about that, captured by her natural beauty as it appears she isn't wearing any make up, her bright blue eyes , golden brown hair flowing down her shoulders in waves, stopping just a couple inches from the top of the red wings logo. After 2 minutes of stretching, staring also, I decide to take a lap around when I notice the rest of my teammates start to pour out onto the ice with 10 minute left in warm ups before the game. Skating around my teams net with a puck on my stick, practicing my dangles and dekes, I lift my eyes to look at her but quickly look away when we catch eyes for a few seconds. I look down at the puck blushing because she was smiling, ‘I hope no one saw that’ I think to myself but when i look back up to see where I am going, I am quickly corrected because I hear someone comment on it.

“Yo, Matts?! What’s got you all red?” I hear Mitch question me.

“Nothing!” I say quickly, passing him the puck, looking down when others, who ever heard what Mitch just said, turn to look at me to see if I really was blushing.

“He’s all red because he was taking a good long look at Dylan Larkin’s cousin, Y/N” comes another voice to the conversation, William, says. I stare at him wide eyed. “I was right behind you the whole time” he explains

“Shit” I mumble “AWWW, Auston has a crush! Auston has a crush!” chants Mitch as he picks up a puck and skates towards the net to shoot it then come back to us to say ”Good luck getting through Dylan if you want to date her cuz” He pauses to laugh to himself a little ”Y'all have this little fight/argument thing going on for how long as this has this been going on for? Years? I think it’s time it’d stop” He stats “Alright! I don't think he will let me so yeah let’s stop talking about it and get back to warm ups!!” I say skating away from the two to set the example. I take a look at the clock and notice only 2 minutes left and curse to myself quietly ”I wasted all my precious warm up time talking to those idiots” I mumble to myself.

Y/N's P.O.V

I have never seen anyone as handsome as him before. From where I am sitting, I see he has a strong stature, well built, very tall. Matthews #34 plays for Toronto, that’s all I know, oh and his beautiful brown eyes that shine in the light, he looks good in a white jersey, I have seen him in pictures wearing a blue jersey when playing at home in Toronto. Dylan, my cousin, has told me a lot about him, how he used to play with him for team USA. Along with telling me he is one of the best and how much he hates him for being one of the best. Maybe I can ask to meet him?

Auston’s P.O.V

The game went by like a blur. No one scored until the second period though in the first some good battles were fought. Red wings scored first in the game but James opens the score for us two minutes after. Then Mitch scores to gain the lead in the game. I scored myself, but in the third period after the Red Wings tied the score. We win the game with a score of 3-2.

Upon arriving to the locker room after hugging congratulating my team for the game, I spot Coach and Red wings head coach, Jeff Bashill, speaking together in the hall, as if they were old buds and not enemies.

By time Coach came to the locker room, I was already changed and showered, my gear packed into its bag making its way to the hallway to a trolley by a equipment staff to be put in the bus but because it’s not here yet it has to wait like I am doing at the moment, I was stuck in my thoughts before Coach got all of our attention so he could talk to us.

“Ok ! Can I have everyone's attention please?!! Sit down it won’t take long. Alright the bus should be here soon so sit tight. First off I want to thank James for putting us on the board, Mitchy for tying it up and Matts for scoring the game winner. Lets not forget Andersen for blocking all shots and to who ever else did so too” he paused so we could clap for our hard played game. "We have the opportunity to attend a party organized by the red wings, some of you know this already but if you don't I used to coach the wings which is why we got invited so clean up nice, we leave tomorrow to go home with a couple days off. Ok! See you on the boys on the bus”. With that everyone resumed to what they were doing before Coach started talking. Still waiting for the bus, I pull out my phone to answer some texts I got before or during the game. “Hey Matts!” I hear Mitch yell to me over the music in the locker room. “Yeah?” I answer him looking up from my phone to see him smirking at me ”With Y/N being Dylan’s cousin she will be there, maybe you could make a move, don't you think?” he pretended to think with his pointer finger and thumb stroking his chin. I blush thinking about an answer “Now that I think about it Larkin never mention a cousin before when we talked , like normal people. I told him almost everything about myself but he has said almost nothing about himself. We almost always made team USA together” I mutter the last part to myself,” bus is here!!” someone yells in the locker room “Finally” almost everyone cheers, excited for the party.

From the rink to wherever the party is taking place it took at least 20 minutes. The bus was quiet, barely anyone saying a word to each other until we got to the party . Everyone was talking now because it was not a house we pulled up to it was a freaking mansion! Once the bus stopped everyone tumbled out of the bus in order to get to the party quicker.

My feet had just barely landed on the ground when I was tackled slightly from the back by an excited Mitch. William not far from him when he pushed passed me to get to the front. “let’s go party!” came from some of the older guys “yeah let’s go” I cheered with some others, smiling I begin walking towards the entrance with the team.

Entering the mansion,  I look around. Amazed with all the details on the ceiling and everything around, everything looked expensive . With my eyes still wandering, they catch sight of Y/N who was stood at the top of the beautifully designed staircase. She was wearing a cream coloured dress with lace, not much showing but just enough, she kept her hair the same as before. Our eyes meet and we share a smile. She begins to descend the stairs while I walk towards her our eyes still connected until a hand on my shoulder turns me around harshly toward them, “Matthews! You don't look at talk to or even think about my cousin! She doesn't need someone like you in her life, only good people deserve her kindness. Go find some other girl to mess with not my cousin! You hear me?! Do you hear me?!!!!” Dylan yells in my face, I take a look at Juliet , the person Dylan is yelling at me about and notice she looks worried but I just smile in away to tell her it’s ok “yes I hear you but I wasn’t planning on breaking her heart or hurting her or even messing around with her like you think i would do with her. I was thinking more of treating her like a queen than what you are thinking. I don't know man but i never thought love at first sight existed until i took a look at her. I’d give her anything she ever wanted in the whole wide world. I’d give up hockey if she wanted me to” Dylan thought over my words, luckily no one really paid attention to what happening. After a whole minute, Dylan looked towards Juliet, still stood on the staircase, I looked also. She was trying to convince Dylan to give me a chance ”Ok I am going to let you date my cousin but one word of you doing something that upsets her, you’re dead” Dylan says after a couple seconds and walks away.

I watch him until Mitch is in my face ”Hey! Go get your girl! He gave you permission.” he laughed at my face as realization took over, I turn quickly to see Y/N begin to turn to go back up occasionally looking over her shoulder to see if I was following, with a smile on her face. I sprint to the stairs and take two at a time to get to her faster.

Once standing next to her at the top of the stairs, she smiles up to me and holds out her hand for me to take into mine. I place my hand into hers and I am mesmerized at how our hands fit like puzzle pieces, her tiny delicate hand is smothered by my giant one. “So” I snap my head up to at the sound of her, like her looks, beautiful voice. “What should we do first?” she asks me as she leads me to what I assume her bedroom “we should get to know each other” I suggest to which she nods her head. Exactly a hour later, many questions and laughs were shared ,now we just stare at each other in silence until she decides to break it “I feel like this is from Romeo and Juliet” she smiles at me “Really? How?” I say surprised “Because of how we got to this moment” she blushes, I smile because I caused it “Well we could call this ‘Something Like Romeo and Juliet’ then” I say  “That sounds perfect” she laughs, I love her laugh and I plan on hearing it for the rest of my life.

#auston matthews #auston matthews imagines #hockey imagines #nhl imagines #toronto maple leafs

[reporterbumble561]

Jdate Reddit

Back in the day, Farrah Abraham was a nice Christian high school girl from Council Bluffs, Iowa. Like any 16 year old, she had hopes and aspirations – her plan was to go into modeling after graduation. All those dreams came crashing down when she found herself pregnant. And it got even better when the baby’s father Derek Underwood died in a tragic car crash two months before she gave birth. So much drama right? Just perfect for the voyeuristic shlockmeisters at MTV Networks who found a perfect cast member for their new “Reality” show – 16 and Pregnant – which followed the stories of pregnant teenage girls in high school dealing with the hardships of teenage pregnancy. Duh. That appearance provided Farrah with her next gig, another MTV waste of life titled Teen Mom – which followed the lives of Farrah and three other girls from the first season of 16 and Pregnant as they navigated their first years of motherhood.

After spending so much time in the spotlight – Teen Mom regularly pulled upward of 3-5 million viewers an episode – Farrah’s life and career took a standard trajectory – She tried to pitch her own spin-off reality series to follow her journey after culinary school as an aspiring chef, but the show never really made it to production. Farrah also launched her own brand of pasta sauce called Mom & Me Premium Italian Hot Pepper Sauce, wrote a book My Teenage Dream Ended and released several music singles. etc. But I guess it still wasn’t enough. Still missing from her life was that special someone, a partner who could keep up with the successful single parent media machine that was Farrah. So what’s a girl to do? Go on JDate of course, where one can find successful single men of the mosaic persuasion known to take good care of their women. Her JDate profile read:

On JDate, however, the lowest monthly cost you can get is $29.99 ( if you subscribe for six full months with a single payment of $179.94). There is also an in-between, three-month subscription plan that comes at $44.99/month and is billed in a single payment of $134.97. Users can pay over mobile phones, PayPal, and of course, a credit card. Click/tap Yes to confirm. To unblock a member: Click/tap on your small Profile Photo at the top of the page, or the horizontal menu lines ( ☰) if using the app. Select Account Settings, and then Block List. Click/tap on the Display Name for the desired member. Click/tap Yes to confirm. If you’ve received inappropriate. Founded in 1997, Jdate is part of Spark Networks. According to the developers, it was the first dating site for single and unmarried Jews. Using it, people create families and seek serious relationships. This app has been the undisputed leader in the number of. JDate is available for smartphones thanks to a downloadable app that effectively scales down the interface for touchscreen, while also preserving all important features. Signing up with JDate is entirely cost-free, but in order to send messages a monthly, quarterly or semi-annual subscription to gold membership is a must.

I’m looking for a man to be my partner in crime, who is successful like me, and has style. If you can give a woman everything she deserves and you want the same in exchange, message me. You won’t regret it. I’m looking for a man that is top of the line; I guess I’m picky. I want a man who is happy, supportive, works hard, is successful, can stay in but can also go out, is active, outgoing, easygoing, likes children and dogs, can be serious, but knows when to have fun and is a romantic.

This was reported in September of 2011. By early December of that year, Farrah had snagged herself a handsome and well to do Jewish man 14 years her senior – 34 year old Marcel Kaminstein, a jewelry entrepreneur. Things were looking good, initial reports were rosy and Kaminstein was getting along well with Farrah’s daughter. So now we know the secret to success on JDate! Be an ambitious 20 year old hot single Mom willing to date an older man! Lack of Jewishness not a problem, fatties needn’t apply.

Sadly by New years, 2012 the relationship had gone south and Kaminstein and Abraham had called it quits – amicably. Now what!? There were a couple of options on the table – but none had the potential for fame that she enjoyed during Teen Mom. Until Farrah met another Jewish man, one James Deen, an adult video entertainer who had starred in over 1,300 porn flicks. Did she meet the HEEB 100 member on JDate? We don’t know. Did they really date or was he merely a hired gun for Farrah’s next publicity stunt? Well, that relationship did not last long either amid allegations that Deen mistreated Farrah and had a small wiener. Yes that relationship ended acrimoniously but not before Deen and Farrah filmed a sex tape. Farrah claimed she shot the professionally produced tape as a keepsake – like a wedding video – for her own use: “I wanted my own personal video made and photos taken for myself, when I am older I will have my best year to look back on. I’m happy to see my 21st year be done. I’ve learned a lot.”

Then Farrah claimed that the tape had been leaked and that she had no choice but to start shopping it around. She finally made a deal with adult film juggernaut Vivid Videos. The movie, “Farrah Superstar: Backdoor Teen Mom,” will be released in mid May and Farrah got nearly $1 million for the rights. Just to be clear, the “backdoor” reference does not refer to an actual door. And also the whole lost sex tape thing was a ruse. Deen’s mistreatment was merely him spilling the beans on the whole “story” because he claimed he cannot lie. The plan was always to release the sex tape as a play for further fame and fortune à la Kim Kardashian. Shocker. The sex tape can now be viewed all over the internet, just like the Kardashian tape.

And what have we learned from all of this boys and girls? If you can’t find ultimate happiness on JDate, like so many others before you, uhm, you can always release a sex tape. Also everything about this post is total and complete trash. I’m sorry. But that’s just life in the big city. Best of luck to Farrah and her daughter. As for James Deen, he is costarring with Lindsay Lohan in the upcoming film “The Canyons” directed by Paul Schrader and written by Brett Easton-Ellis.

AuthorRecent Postswendy in fursI live and blog anonymously from New York. If my boss knew this was me, I'd be fired in a nano-second. Ha ha! Screw you boss man!Latest posts by wendy in furs (see all)

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4.0 ★★★★☆

300,000members50,000/weekly 57%/43% Male& Female

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57%/43% Male& Female 4/5 hookup chance High Sex Chance GeographyUSA, International low fraud riskVerificationemail, FacebookMobile AppiOS, Android$59.99 - $179.94subscription priceFree versionbasic account and search

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Jdate is celebrating its 20th anniversary being online and connecting Jewish people in the USA. The platform was created to bring together like-minded people for all kinds of relationships like friendship or casual dating. Still, most of all, Jdate is focusing on serious relationships comparing with any other sex apps.

Also, Jdate seems to be responsible for half marriages in the Jewish community, and all of those are successful. These statistics got our attention, and we wanted to see in our own experience if it works that well.

Affordability

★★★☆☆

As much as we would like to have free plans to use at the Jdate website, there are none. They offer little promotions from time to time, like 20 free messages for users over the weekend, but that is usually a short period, and 20 messages are not quite enough, as we all know.

Free service

Jdate offers to create an account and search through the members to see what’s out there. Although, that’s about it. You won’t be able to do anything more unless you get an upgrade to the paid subscription.

Paid service

Jdate offers one VIP membership for 1, 3, or 6 months. Price is quite over the average for dating app usage. Although the membership gives you a fair amount of features to use once you purchase it.

Since you have an account at Jdate and can search for members with a free version, after the membership upgrade, you gain access to other members’ photos, see who liked your profile or viewed it. You can also turn off your online status so other users won’t see you and browse all possible accounts anonymously. You would get access to send and receive messages together with receipts of reading ones.

There is also a “Messaging+” feature. It allows sending messages to all registered users with the option to reply to that. Meaning, even a random user who does have a profile but haven’t upgraded to the Premium subscription can receive and respond to your messages.

Audience quality

★★★★★☆

Jdate is probably one of those dating applications where the number of females is in real usage experience is higher than the percentage of males. Also, even though the platform was created as a dating scene for Jewish people, it does not forbid other people to use it. You can join the website regarding your faith or beliefs, but you should be interested in finding Jewish partners.

The website does welcome all kinds of relationships, so you don’t need to be looking for a serious and committed relationship. Searching for a casual thing and friends is also welcomed.

Age distribution

You can register at the platform if you are 18 years old and older. Yet the majority of users are in their mid-30s and 40s, but you still can find younger generations who are looking for new people to connect on different aspects of life.

Fakes and scammers

Since there are no free accounts and mostly Jewish circles of people, it is hard to find any scammers. The registration process also does all possible to illuminate such users. There might be a few bots to engage new users to upgrade to a paid membership, but that would happen anyway.

There also could be old accounts that are no longer being used, but that’s about it, which also happens a lot with free dating sites no sign-up.

Interface

★★★★☆

We did enjoy the website from the moment we saw it. It is easy to navigate and leads you straight to the registration. The smooth design makes you want to find out what is waiting for you behind the sign-up wall.

Although this website collects most of its users to look for serious relationships, it also has a few fun features that would appear entertaining to everyone.

A Special admire feature was created for shy people. You can mark a profile of a user that you like, and Jdate will find out if that person feels the same way towards you. Jdate has a section with profiles section where other users can like suggested people or mark it as a cross if that’s a no.

Another feature that Jdate is offering is “Kibitz Corner.” This is also an entertaining function that helps initiate a conversation. You can post daily questions to see later what people have been answering — an easy way to start getting to know someone through such small talk.

Jdate has two more features called “Jdate Events” and “JLife.” “Jdate Events” were created to gather like-minded strangers together but for an actual offline meetup. “JLife” is a blog where you can seek advice, read tips for successful dating, and get inspired by happy stories from real married couples that got together thanks to Jdate.

Signing up

To create an account, you would need to spend around 5-7 minutes. You can choose to register through your already existing account on Facebook or by using an email address.

You would need to share your information, like your first and last name, your gender, full birth date, and Zip Code to narrow down your location to help connect you with singles only in your area. Then you would need to agree with the Terms of Service and Privacy Statement to continue.

The next step will follow you to filling your account. You would start by adding your photos: you have to add at least one picture and then add up to 6, if you want to. Jdate would suggest you choose a photo with a clear face, and preferably where you are by yourself to avoid confusion. Of course, moderators will take down all kinds of photos with offensive or inappropriate content.

Once you are done with that, there will be one more step left — to add more personal information like your height, religion, occupation, kids, level of education, and college. You can skip all of those, but it is required to add your religion and education right away. Otherwise, you won’t be able to go any further.

Now you need to verify your account, log in to the platform, and begin your search.

Profile

As you can see from the registration form, the profiles are quite detailed, which helps to narrow your search down in the best compatible way. The more details you add about yourself, the better it is for your future matches to find you. You can change any of your details later on.

Your profile photo will be visible for every registered user regarding the subscription plan. If you detect any profiles that seem odd to you, don’t hesitate and forward it directly to the moderators for further suspension if it will eventually be a fake profile.

Searching

As a free member of the Jdate, you can scroll through the members who are in your area. But only VIP members can use advanced filters to search for other users.

Chat

Private chat is available for members who upgraded their membership to VIP status. Otherwise, you will be able only to search for an account without any possibility of contacting others. Yet there is a chance to communicate with others even with a free account.

There is a feature available for VIP members. As a paid user, you can find someone who interests you and send them a message. If they are using a free account, for now, they still will be able to respond only to your messages.

Mobile app

The Jdate has both apps available to download for free at iOS and Android stores. The interface of the app is catchy and designed well. Easy to navigate and find yourself dates without typical swiping. You can see all of the profile details that are well highlighted.

Security and privacy

★★★★☆

The Jdate takes security measures seriously. Thanks to full registration, it helps to narrow down and illuminate any fake profiles and scammers who are trying to become a part of the inside community.

We also like Facebook registration as an option. That helps to avoid fake accounts and ease the registration. In case there is any odd or offensive account, you can report them to the moderators team, who will suspend the account if the profile appears to be fake.

Odds of success

★★★★☆

The chances to meet someone are high due to the tight circle. Also, the website itself encourages people to seek a serious relationship by posting happily married couples on the virtual pages of their magazine. You can be open here as much as you want and find new people to meet.

Friendship and casual dating are also popular on the platform. In our opinion, Jdate Events are also important to the community. That gives you a real chance to meet someone offline.

Matching algorithm

The advanced search feature is available only to VIP members. It will connect you through your location and by the main criteria that can be added to the profile.

What others say

We always try to reflect on other opinions to see how the app is working out for different people. Same reason we collected a few reviews from users who also tried Jdate.

I like it

★★★★★

Coming from someone who’s tried pretty much every worthy Jewish dating site out there (Jmatch, JWed, Jewish Cafe — many of which look rusty), I like Jdate by far the most. Modern and easy to use the website, and the same quality is reflected in the user base. Jenny G.

I’ve given it a second try

★★☆☆☆

I hate admitting it, but I rejoined Jdate due to a special promotion they were doing over the 4th of July, where a 6-month membership was $75, which IMO is pretty good. They seem to run promotions like this around every major US and Jewish holiday. I’ve tried Backpage alternatives too.

Although, I’ve been back on Jdate for a few now and haven’t had any dates lined up. On average, I get messages from guys who live out of state (probably want me to send them dirty pictures), local guys who are ugly, or local guys who are either much younger or much older than me.

Out of every paid online dating website, IMO Jdate is the trickiest to cancel. J.J.

My personal experience

★★☆☆☆

Reluctant to try JDATE, I was first a non-paying subscriber, I could see the ladies but not contact them. To my utter surprise, the lady I felt was the best looking of all, sent me a message, but I could not see it until I became a paying subscriber, which I did. She was legit! We communicated & then met. I met one other nice lady also in my first week.

Well, no fault of JDATE, the ladies were real & attractive, & in my age group (60). However, I was one & done with these ladies for different reasons. Maybe I was one of many trying to meet them & they both got “better offers.” I will never actually know what happened. So to take my mind off of the 2 ladies, I reached out by carefully written, decent messages to about 12-15 more ladies. Only 2 responded with aloof responses that were a bit polite that they responded but not encouraging.

That’s it! Not one lady has looked at my profile in 3-4 weeks unless I count one who looked and lived 2k miles away. From Denver, the pickings on JDATE are very slim. There are photos & profiles of ladies who haven’t logged on in 4 months or longer. What does that tell me? Unless I enjoy more rejection, I am not messaging someone who isn’t logging on. Probably they don’t even know their photo remains on JDATE.

Bottom line: the 2 ladies I did meet were quality. They have many men to choose from & I am apparently not their choice. Most ladies, for one reason or another, do not even respond, & seemingly my profile & photos are not being looked at. I regret joining, as it is wasteful with very little chance of success regardless of my time & efforts.

I only give it 2 stars as someone, I guess, is dating those 2 ladies I did meet. They are real but probably have much to choose from & their self-esteem must be sky-high. I have 5 months remaining, already paid for, but expect that zero will come from it. If you are male, especially, good luck, it is difficult & I would steer you away from JDATE. See a few nice photos of ladies? Well, most are no longer active on the site. The few that are real and active on this site will be extremely choosy, with only their ideals of perfection gaining their attention.

Bottom line

Overall, we would rate Jdate as an above medium but the fair application to meet Jewish people in your area that is worth trying. The website is on the top for 20 years, which makes us confident that there are a lot of great and medium experiences that could have happened throughout the years. Besides, the security is also top-notch here as well as the support system.

5.0 ★★★★★

11 millionsmembers300k per months 10%/90% Male& Female

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FAQ

What is Jdate?

Jdate is the app that was created for Jewish people to meet each other for friendship, casual dating, and serious relationships.

Can I use Jdate for free?

There are only browsing members that are available for you as a free user. To get to all other features, you would need to upgrade your membership to the VIP.

Can I send messages as a free user?

No, you can send messages only if you are a VIP member of the platform. Yet if a VIP member would like to send you a message, you would be able to read it and respond to that.

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How do I connect with other people on Jdate?

Advanced search filters are available for the paid users and will connect you by your current location and profile details that you can filter manually.

Is Jdate safe to use?

Yes, Jdate is safe to use as they are taking their security level very strict.

Why was there $1 charged from me?

This is the pre-authorization of your card, a usual way to check if you filled the active bank card and not the fake one. It will be returned to you back within 24 hours.

What’s JLife?

Reddit Jewish

JLife is an online magazine where you can learn more about Jewish dating and learn the main tips. Also, you can read and get inspired by success stories from couples that have met and got married after meeting through the Jdate.