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onthepyre · 4 years

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cats

the second part of this is basically what i did last night but connor is a lot braver than me. anyway.

Evan does this at least once a week.

He gets home, and for whatever reason, whether it be the smile Connor gave him during lunch that lasted a bit too long or that romantic-looking restaurant he walked by on the way home, he's feeling sappy. And he walks straight to his room, lays down on the floor, and listens to Cavetown.

The amount of time Evan spends on the floor is directly proportional to how many times he caught Connor looking at him during science class. Sometimes he counts; the record so far is 23 times in one class period. He spent two hours on the floor that day, staring at the ceiling.

As soon as he's home, he's settled on his carpet with the soft sounds of a guitar playing in his headphones. It's peaceful, quiet. There are only a few things that Evan thinks about, and number one on his list is how much better it would be if Connor was here.

His heart talks about Connor a lot. His mind objects, but Evan's heart seems to beat with his name. Connor Murphy Connor Murphy Connor Murphy. Evan never gets tired of it. His heart talks about Connor's hair, his eyes, his smile, his hands-

Don't get him started on Connor's hands.

Evan has watched Connor draw before. The style of his art matches him well. It's sharp, fast, messy, perfect. But when he's drawing, Evan watches Connor's hands rather than the piece.

They're fluid. They glide.

Connor Murphy does not glide. He stomps, he runs, he marches, but he does not glide. But when he's drawing, his hands float. They look the same, as angular as Connor himself, but they're different. Softer. Evan figures Connor's face is the same, but he's always been too focused to look.

Evan often considers what Connor's hands feel like. They look strong, but Evan is certain they're lighter than they seem. He wonders what it would be like to hold Connor's hand. Is he one of those people that would hang on too tight? Would he barely touch Evan's hand? Would he be grossed out by Evan's sweaty palms?

Evan also, more tentatively, thinks about Connor's hands on his face. In his hair. Looped around his waist. These thoughts, of course, are more focused on where Connor's mouth would be at the moment, but there is attention to his hands then, too.

And Connor's mouth. Of course. His lips are always chapped and often bleeding because Connor picks at them when he gets bored and Evan knows this because he stares at Connor during French class and he knows Connor hates French. Connor bites his lips a lot, too. It isn't meant to be nearly as swoon-worthy as it makes Evan feel, but it nearly breaks him every time Connor chews on his lip. Evan's fairly certain this is something he does when he's bored, too, although it might be a nervous habit.

Connor has a lot of nervous habits, from what Evan's seen. He spins his pen, taps his foot, braids little strands of his hair — the list goes on. Evan knows each and every one of them.

——

Connor has his own sort of ritual. After begging Zoe to stop at Tim Hortons so they could get coffee, he sits at the window in the den and watches Law & Order SVU. He had never seen it until Zoe showed him the John Mulaney bit about Ice-T and now he's addicted. It's a problem.

Unbeknownst to either, Connor's SVU marathons are the equivalent of Evan's Cavetown sessions. Evan thinks about Connor and Connor thinks about Ice-T. And Evan. Mostly Evan.

Connor has a thing for the way Evan talks. He knows that Evan himself hates it and most of the school thinks he's annoying, but Connor thinks it's adorable.

Evan has to say exactly what he wants to say, and if he messes it up, he will start over. He messes up a lot. It doesn't help that sometimes his tongue catches on words and he gets stuck on a certain sound and has to go back to the beginning of the sentence. It takes active listening to understand what he's saying but it makes Connor melt.

That's the thing that makes Connor think so hard. He's supposed to be the mopey badass, the scary emo, the aloof rebel-without-a-cause. He has a reputation to uphold, even if it's less punk and more school shooter (okay, less punk and more sad). He may be openly bisexual, yes, but he shouldn't be falling for a tiny tree-obsessed nerd.

And the fact that Evan of all people is the one his heart decided on is, well, bad. Connor's too worried that Evan isn't into him to do anything other than stare and Evan can't take a fucking hint. Connor may think his cluelessness is cute, but it's also really inconvenient. Connor thinks a lot of things about Evan are cute but inconvenient.

Evan is really, really good at accidentally blocking people's paths and then moving out of the way at the same time the other person does, thus blocking them again. Evan hates it and Connor thinks it's funny. If it goes on for long enough, Evan starts blushing, and Connor starts falling apart.

And oh my god, when Evan blushes. It's not like it's uncommon, Evan is both awkward and incredibly aware of it, but Connor still thinks it's adorable. It brings out his freckles and colors the tops of his ears pink. If Evan is especially embarrassed, he'll try to hide in his hands, but his fingertips are always tinged with the same rose-colored mortification.

Connor's thoughts drift as he pulls out his phone and scrolls through instagram, but Evan is still there in the back of his mind. He's always there, no matter what Connor is doing. He spots Evan in the shadows created by the trees in the backyard; sees Evan's worried smile on his mother's face; catches himself doodling Evan's silhouette in the background of drawings. Evan, Evan, Evan.

Connor's phone buzzes in his hand as he scrolls past a collection of Bee Movie memes. He opens the message, noting it's from Evan.

hhey

He's still typing, but Connor replies anyway.

whats up

The typing bubble disappears for a moment, then pops back up

what r u duing

Connor takes a moment to grin at the misspelling before he responds.

watching svu

do u eanna come see cats with ne

uhh?? no but absolutely yes im coming, what time

theres a show jn half an hour

cool see you then

Connor tucks his phone into his pocket and pulls his hands through his hair. He's going on a date. With Evan. But it's not a date, his mind says. Connor ignores it.

He's out the door in no time, stopping only to grab a half-eaten bag of twix and shove it in the pocket of his hoodie.

——

Evan arrives at the theater before Connor does, and sits down next to a claw machine after buying his ticket. He thinks about texting Connor, but his energy for starting conversations is nearly gone — he barely stuttered his way through asking for a medium popcorn, so he's decided to recharge for a bit while he waits for Connor.

Connor bursts through the door a few minutes later, then stops to look around. He breaks into a smile when he spots Evan, who lifts his hand in a tired wave. Evan watches Connor talk to the woman at the ticket booth, then the man at the concession stand. He approaches Evan with a bag of Sprees in his hand.

"Hey," he says.

"Hi."

"I know Sprees are the worst, but they're the only food that seems to last past the previews, so." Evan nods, trying to hide the already partially eaten bag of popcorn sitting next to him. "Well, shall we?" Connor reaches down to pull Evan up from the bench. Evan smiles as thanks, but Connor doesn't let go of his hand. His mind moves at the speed of light, even though there are only two thoughts in his head: Connor Connor Connor and hand.

Connor holds onto him all the way to the screening room, where he tugs Evan into the back row. He drops Evan's hand as they sit. Connor drops the Sprees into the cupholder on his left and pulls out the Twix, which he starts inhaling immediately.

When the movie starts, there's only one other person in the room: an old man in the front row, who Connor insists is Andrew Lloyd Webber himself, and it's not an issue if they talk because Webber started this whole fiasco and deserves to hear their "critiques."

The moment the first cat appears on the screen, Connor is laughing. "Why does she have boobs?" he whispers.

"Connor!"

"If they're going to give her boobs, she should have six, not two."

"Connor, talk quieter!"

"Are we supposed to be attracted to the cats?"

Defeated, Evan drops his face into his hands while Connor cackles next to him.

They make it to Rum-Tum-Tugger without any other mishaps, but as soon as the new cat starts singing, Connor loses it again.

"Why is he wearing a fur coat? That's terrifying!"

"What?"

"You'd be scared if you saw someone wearing a coat made of skin." Evan looks over at him with a desperate expression on his face.

"Connor, please," he begs, "let's just… let's appreciate cat Jason Derulo."

Connor nods, still wheezing, and calms down a bit. Until cat Jason Derulo whips off his fur coat in a display of his cat muscles.

Connor drops his head onto Evan's shoulder. "I can't do this," he says through a fit of giggles.

But Evan is more focused on the fact that Connor's head is on his shoulder oh my god. And Evan hears Connor's foot tap, tap, tapping on the floor. Nervous habit. And once again, Connor's hand finds his.

"Gotta ground myself. Make sure we're not dead, y'know." So Evan, with as much bravery as he can muster, squeezes Connor's hand. And Connor squeezes back.

But Connor doesn't move. He stays there, his head on Evan's shoulder, his hand in Evan's hand. And Evan can't focus on the movie anymore. He eventually picks his head up to laugh at Mr. Mistoffelees, but Connor hangs onto Evan's hand for the rest of the movie. He's soft, softer than Evan expected, and evidently doesn't mind his sweaty palms, so Evan doesn't complain.

As the credits roll, Evan gathers the bits of courage he has left and look over at Connor. "Is, uh, was this, like a date? Or did I, um, completely misinterpret what's- did I misunderstand this? B-because-"

Connor cuts him off. "Do you want this to be a date?" He's quiet, much quieter than normal.

Evan's voice is even smaller when he answers. "Um. Yeah." He stares down at his free hand, trying to avoid the one Connor still has a firm grip on.

"Great. Then it was a date." Evan can hear the smile in Connor's voice. He looks up, and Connor is beaming, and Evan can hear his foot tapping the floor again. And Connor's hand is on his jaw and Evan is leaning forward and their lips are pressed together.

It's different than Evan had imagined. Slower. Gentler. But he's kissing Connor Murphy and Connor Murphy is kissing him back.

Evan is the first to pull away. He knows his face is a bright shade of pink, but he doesn't really care. His phone buzzes in his pocket.

"Oh, uh, my mom's here." He thinks he sees Connor's face fall for half a second, but he isn't sure.

"Oh. Alright. See you soon."

Evan leans over and pecks his cheek. "Thanks."

#treebros #deh #dear evan hansen #evan hansen #connor murphy #connor x evan #pining evan #pining connor #just a lot of pining #cats #lowkey just me projecting but its fine #kissing #holding hands #kinda sappy #june's writing

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mimikyuu · 4 years

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i have not been all that active on social media as of late and have mostly lost interest in my ocs??? Ive gone back to school and dealing with some stress!!! im gonn try and start seeing a therapist i think 🤔

but anyway!!!! I am much more active on twitter and instagram and u guys are welcome to follow me there!!!

alexandrq_ is my active twitter. I mostly just retweet things and every once in a while i complain about stuff. ( i have like no followers so validate me pls )

and then also ive beat this into the ground but im Lazy.beetle on instagram!! im thinking about organizing a giveaway over there some time jn the future. so tell u friends

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sebuchi-core · 6 years

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SEVENTEEN OH MY! ERA VIDEO MASTERLIST

This will be updated every weekend (or when I’m able to do so) with new videos. For the raw videos, I will edit the list once I see a subbed version. Please do inform me if I’m missing a video or if a raw video has been subbed by someone. NOTE 1: This list only consists of their activities for YMMD and does not include JUN & THE8′s current activities in China. NOTE 2: Fancams and videos from their Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or V app may or may not be included.

!!! All credits goes to the rightful owners !!!

[FIRST WEEK: 180716 - 180722] 180717 - SEVENTEEN @ Idol Room (subbed) 180717 - SEVENTEEN X EATING SHOW (subbed) 180718 - AKMU Suhyun’s Volume Up Raw Clips (1) (2) 180718 - AKMU Suhyun’s Volume Up FULL (raw) (subbed) 180718 - Kim Changryul’s Old School Radio FULL (raw) (subbed) 180719 - SEVENTEEN @ Mcountdown Mini Fanmeeting (raw) 180719 - Oh My! at Mcountdown (normal) (4K) 180719 - Our Dawn is Hotter than Day at Mcountdown (normal) (4K) 180719 - M2 Oh My! Individual Cam: 95 Line (SC) (JH) (JS) 180719 - M2 Oh My! Individual Cam: 96 Line (JN) (HS) (WW) (WZ) 180719 - M2 Oh My! Individual Cam: 97 Line (T8) (MG) (DK) 180719 - M2 Oh My! Individual Cam: 98-99 Line (SK) (VN) (DN) 180719 - Lee Gukjoo’s Youngstreet FULL (raw) 180720 - SEVENTEEN for Star1 (raw) 180720 - SEVENTEEN Comeback Interview @ Music Bank (raw) 180720 - Oh My! at Music Bank (normal ver) 180720 - Our Dawn is Hotter than Day at Music Bank (normal ver) 180721 - SEVENTEEN Interview @ Music Core (raw) 180721 - Oh My! at Music Core (normal) (4K) 180721 - Our Dawn is Hotter than Day at Music Core (normal) (4K) 180721 - SEVENTEEN x Dal.komm Coffee (raw) (subbed) 180722 - Oh My! at Inkigayo (normal ver) 180722 - Our Dawn is Hotter than Day at Inkigayo (normal ver) 180722 - JEONGHAN & HOSHI at King of Mask Singer EP163 (subbed)

[SECOND WEEK: 180723 - 180729] 180723 - SEVENTEEN x Dal.komm Coffee (raw) 180723 - Ulsan Summer Festival Rehearsal Fancams (1) (2) (3) 180723 - Ulsan Summer Festival Full Performance Fancams (1) (2) 180724 - King Of Mask Singer Special Video: JH & HS (raw) 180724 - YMMD Behind: Set The Sun Ver (subbed) 180725 - YMMD Behind: Meet Ver (subbed) 180725 - SEVENTEEN Comeback Interview @ Show Champion (raw) 180725 - Oh My! at Show Champion (normal ver) 180725 - Our Dawn is Hotter than Day at Show Champion (normal ver) 180725 - Ji Sukjin’s 2PM Date FULL (raw 1) (raw 2) (subbed) 180725 - Yang Yoseob’s Dreaming Radio FULL (raw) 180726 - Oh My! at Mcountdown (normal ver) 180726 - SEVENTEEN Mcountdown Encore (4K) 180726 - YMMD Behind: Follow Ver (subbed) 180726 - SC JS WW @ After Mom Falls Asleep (subbed) 180726 - Moon Heejun’s Music Show FULL (raw) 180727 - SEVENTEEN x Dal.komm Coffee (raw) 180727 - Idol Radio EP4 FULL (subbed) 180727 - Idol Radio EP4 Behind 1 (subbed) 180727 - Oh My! at Music Bank (normal ver) 180728 - JEONGHAN & WOOZI at Dingo (raw) (subbed) 180728 - Oh My! at Music Core (normal ver) 180729 - Oh My! at Inkigayo (normal ver) [THIRD WEEK: 180730 - 180805] 180730 - Idol Radio EP4 Behind 2 (subbed) 180730 - Idol Radio EP4 Behind 3 (subbed) 180730 - SEVENTEEN Mcountdown Encore Full (raw) 180730 - SEVENTEEN Music Bank Encore Full (raw) 180731 - SEVENTEEN Show Champion Encore Full (raw) 180731 - Show Champion Behind 1 (raw) (subbed) 180731 - Show Champion Behind 2 (raw) (subbed) 180731 - Choi Hwajung’s Power Time FULL (raw) 180801 - Song Euni, Kim Suk’s Unnie Radio FULL (raw) 180802 - Oh My! at Mcountdown (normal) (4K) 180803 - Oh My! at Music Bank (normal) 180803 - Oh My! Relay Dance (link) 180804 - Dingo 10 SEC video (subbed) 180804 - Oh My! at Music Core (normal) (4K) 180805 - Oh My! at Inkigayo (normal) [FOURTH WEEK: 180806 - 180812] 180806 - SEVENTEEN in Aztalk (raw)

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itsyourchoicedevotionals · 5 years

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Off By A Hair

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” Gen 3:1ESV

Inside and outside of the churches, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to discern truth from lies. Are you like me? Do you hear the slightest deviation from truth in the rhetoric from the politicians, the newsmen/women, some preachers and their sermons, posts on Facebook— twitter— instagram, advertisements, conversations?

What is deviation? Mac Apple dictionary defines this: “the amount by which a single measurement differs from a fixed value.” My great-granddaughter is an avid hunter. Bow is her preferred method of hunting. She is quick to tell me— “if you’re off by a hair or a mile, there’s no difference. You miss the deer. There’s no deviating from the bullseye to hit the target.”

There’s a enormous number of people who don’t care how far off from the truth they are. Paul informed the Thessalonians’ church in 2Thess 2:9-12ESV “The coming of the lawless one is by the activity of Satan with all power and false signs and wonders, and with all wicked deception for those who are perishing, because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. Therefore God sends them a strong delusion, so that they may believe what is false, in order that all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousness.”

Did you catch that? They’d believe a lie that they might be damned? I’m prone to think women running around with vaginas on their heads— women fighting for their right to kill their unborn child via abortion might fall in this category. Are they listening to a slight variation of truth? For some, I comprehend their dilemma— ‘I’ve been raped my child is a product of rape.’ Ethel Waters was a dynamic singer for the Billy Graham Crusades in the earlier years of Graham’s ministry. She talked about her mother being a child, when she was raped, with her as the result. God used sin’s worst for His glory. There are many scenarios for abortion. My question— When did we become God and decide for life or death?

Core 2000 was a new form of schooling which the United Nations sent down to ALL participating member nations, in the late 1980’s. I remember the talk-show radio hosts declaring how this one tool would change the world. Boy was I ever naive for not believing! I look at the changes in the younger two generations all stemming from the educational systems Core 2000. Looks like their agenda worked like a charm— Mac Apple dictionary— charm: 3. “an object, act, or saying believed to have magic power.” All of this accomplished by deviating from the ‘truth’ just a couple of hairs. Come to think of it— that’s what brought sin into the world in the first place. Satan deviated from the truth just a tad in the Garden of Eden.

Jesus said: “…you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” Jn 8:32ESV. Read on— V34-36 “Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son remains forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

We must know, recognize and act upon the truth of God’s Word. To deviate from God’s Truth will make us vulnerable to attacks from the devil, deceptions, and plethora of unhappy sub-existences. Is that what you want? It’s your choice. You choose.

PRAYER: Papa God in a world where people have gone insane with sin, we come to You for help. Sovereign God keep us from deviating from Your truths, the way Jesus taught us, in Jesus’ name I pray.

#Jesus Christ #lord of lords #Holy Spirit #Word of God #God #it's your choice #devotionals #off by a hair #free #lie #attacks #deceptions #discerment #truth #love

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jinniebabyangel · 2 years

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I desperately want to no, need to here some news any news from Jn. A cute instagram update or just seomthing. Maybe something about his individual projects obecause expereince has taught me that comebacks are nothing short of nightmares for Jn stans most of the time. I miss him.

I think all signs are pointing at a group comeback,,, but I'm hoping for a solo activity soon, but I guess we'll have to wait after the Grammys or the concert.

He's so secretive about his solo projects so I wouldn't expect any hint...especially not on Instagram 😅..but we can hope for cute pictures and interactions with Hobi lol🤞🤞🤞

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skateofministry · 3 years

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Meet Janthavy Norton, the Skater-Turned-Actress on Everyone’s Radar

The LA-based mega expertise solely sits down with V to speak about being a girl in a male dominated sport, her burgeoning performing profession and the way going with the circulation is vital to her success.

April 7, 2021

Janthavy Norton is a reputation to recollect. A multihyphenate expertise hailing from Arizona, the skateboarder slash actress slash artist exemplifies a era refusing to suit into only one class. At 17, she stumbled into her skateboarding profession by means of a serendipitous introduction at a home get together. True to Zillennial kind, Norton juggled a full-time job and her skateboarding-centric Instagram earlier than unexpectedly catching the eyes of movie execs casting for characters with skating experience. “I used to be actually working in actual property and I’m like ‘I suppose I’ll go be this mannequin or actor for the weekend’,” stated Norton. “I’d work Monday through Friday after which if it labored out with my schedule, I might drive out to LA and I did that for two years.” Now 25, her resume boasts of movie roles and TV appearances — to not point out her beloved aspect hustle creating resin jewellery. A primary-gen American born to a Cambodian mom and Vietnamese father, Norton is bringing illustration to an entire new era of younger feminine skaters. V sat down with Norton to speak about her skateboarding prowess and the way she avoids boxing herself in. “I’m making an attempt to go away the area open and see what rolls in. It’s at all times simply been that means for just a few years now, it’s actually bizarre!”

V MAGAZINE: So first issues first: skateboarding. I’ve seen your skating movies and the issues you are able to do are insane! How did you first get began in skateboarding?

JANTHAVY NORTON: Let’s see, it’s fairly humorous. I believe I used to be 17 and I used to be at a home get together and I acquired bored and I observed that they had a half-pipe within the yard so I requested this man if I may use his skateboard to skate this ramp after which all of those folks have been like “Oh, you need to drop in!”. And I used to be making an attempt. And it didn’t work out. I believe I fell at the very least 20 instances. (laughs) Then I simply went, acquired my very own board, began going to the parks and making an attempt to determine it out for myself. I needed to work at it once I first began and I used to be studying actually shortly however I additionally went like, 7 days per week.

V: You have been devoted.

JN: I used to be fairly devoted at first. I used to be like “I’ve to skate 10 hours per week!”. That was my aim.

V: Oh wow! I like that. You set a aim for your self! Do you are feeling such as you’re the kind of one that will get obsessive about one thing and it’s a must to be the perfect at it? Or was it only a new obsession randomly with skateboarding?

JN: I imply I’ve at all times appreciated sports activities. I’ve achieved cheer, monitor, dance, karate and jiu-jitsu. I like making an attempt new issues however skateboarding was the one factor that caught with me. I’m fairly motivated to attempt to study stuff however really staying with it and making an attempt to good it – I believe skating is the one factor that I’ve tried to try this with.

V: So I additionally noticed that you’ve got a background in performing as properly with roles on NCIS: New Orleans and even a Sia music video! How did you get began in that and is that one thing you’d prefer to additional discover sooner or later?

JN: It’s so bizarre, I really acquired into it due to skating! After I was dwelling again in Arizona, folks have been hitting me up on Instagram and asking me to do these commercials and random shit, proper? I’m like “What is that this?!”. I used to be actually working in actual property and I’m like “I suppose I’ll go be this mannequin or actor for the weekend”. So I’d work Monday through Friday after which if it labored out with my schedule, I might drive out to LA and I did that for two years. However the first gig — I believe it was skating in a pool — they wanted a skater and I used to be like “Yeah, I’m down!”. However so far as performing goes, that began to develop somewhat bit extra once I auditioned for this position in a film. Once more, actually unusual, they have been filming a skate film in India. She messaged me and I used to be like “Are they making an attempt to abduct me or…?”. (laughs)

V: Yeah! Sounds somewhat sketch.

JN: I do know! And naturally, my mother being a mother, she’s like, “You’re going to die, you’re going to die”. I used to be like “Um…”. (laughs) I don’t know, I seemed up their work. So I actually auditioned. It’s humorous, I lately checked out that reel and it was horrible. The lighting was dangerous and I did not know what I used to be doing. However I booked it! And I flew all the best way on the market. And I believe after that, being 8,000 miles away from dwelling, I used to be like “Okay! I’m doing it!”. And I believed I may proceed doing that. So then I lastly acquired illustration and now I’m undoubtedly beginning to consider future targets and eager to get extra into movie and TV stuff. It’s fairly enjoyable. (laughs) There are such a lot of totally different avenues so you actually aren’t restricted to at least one factor.

V: Yeah, completely. I like the way it actually simply developed from a skateboarding ardour after which opened so many doorways up for you.

JN: Actually.

V: So talking of creative endeavors: I noticed that you simply submit a few of your artwork in your Instagram. Did you develop up in a creative dwelling and the way did you develop into an artist?

JN: I’m really first era so at dwelling, no person was actually too creative. I used to be the one within the household that was at all times eager to do all this “wild” stuff like portray and crafting. Since I used to be little, I’ve at all times made handmade playing cards for my household and associates and I simply actually take pleasure in arts and crafts. Positively making an attempt to get extra into paint — I’m doing resin jewellery proper now.

V: Oh, that’s superior! Isn’t that if you cowl a flower or one thing in resin, is that what you do?

JN: Yeah! You may get molds or you may get open vessels and fill it and use press flowers and even pigments. It’s wild, you are able to do so many issues with it so I’m taking part in with that. I used to be promoting them for somewhat however then I acquired burnt out so I’ve stopped for somewhat bit (laughs)

V: Yeah, that’s superior! How do you suppose you mix your artwork and skateboarding passions? Do you are feeling like one medium of self-expression influences the opposite? Is your artwork influenced by your skateboarding in any respect or vice versa?

JN: I believe the one time that it actually blends is that if I’m doing grip artwork on my skateboard. You’ll be able to paint in your grip and make it your personal particular person fashion. However for essentially the most half, I believe that plenty of it stays very separate as a result of skating is sort of like a dance. You discover everyone’s totally different distinctive types and the way they transfer. It’s extra of bodily artwork. The opposite varieties of artwork are extra for stress-free and letting my physique relaxation once I can’t skate. They really go hand in hand collectively however they don’t affect one another.

V: Ah, okay, understood! I additionally wished to the touch on being a girl in a male-dominated subject like skating. What has been your expertise being a girl in skateboarding which is dominated by males normally?

JN: I believe there’s plenty of judgment in it. I imply, we’re working actually, actually onerous to interrupt that however I at all times really feel like there’s an enormous group of males that really feel like ladies which can be sponsored don’t deserve issues as a result of [men] can do issues “higher”. In my private expertise, I’ve had plenty of on-line feedback of “Why would she get that?! I may do that so a lot better” or “Why is she even sponsored?”. For some moments, you undoubtedly really feel like, “Oh, why am I getting connected?”. However then I keep in mind that no, I labored actually onerous. Like, at first, I pushed myself to study and progress and that is my personal journey. There’s undoubtedly plenty of stress in it, however I really feel just like the females group collectively and everyone is actually supportive within the scene. There’s some folks which can be actually specific and really judgmental however for essentially the most half, everyone in it’s all about love and simply having enjoyable.

V: Yeah, I like that! Do you ever battle with imposter syndrome in being a girl in a usually male area? How do you cope with that?

JN: It’s undoubtedly getting higher however I consider that lots of people suppose that women attempt to do it for consideration or no matter. I attempt to simply hold my eyes ahead, doing my factor, remembering that that is one thing that I love and I attempt to simply block all of that out and solely open the area for the folks which can be actually like-minded. They’re simply there to have time, benefit from the group and discover new spots. It’s additionally actually good on your psychological well being and I believe plenty of skaters get that. Once we’re on the market collectively, we simply type of bond and stick collectively and handle each other and ignore the entire negativity that surrounds skating, I suppose.

V: And clearly illustration is a big contributor to inspiring different younger women to not be afraid to become involved in a male-dominated sport. So I wished to know what does illustration imply to you and do you are feeling a way of accountability in being a feminine skateboarder that different younger women can look as much as?

JN: So I really used to show clinics so I really used to listen to little women’ opinions on skateboarding they usually have been at all times very nervous. What I might inform them is “No! You’ll be able to strive actually something on the earth that you simply need to do”. It doesn’t matter if there’s extra boys that do it and you’re feeling misplaced trigger you’re a lady. You need to do no matter makes you are feeling completely satisfied. Simply don’t be afraid to step into an area – personal the area! You understand? And never in an aggressive means however you’re doing this for you. It’s not for anybody else, it’s not about what different folks suppose so I might simply inform them “Simply present up”. What are folks going to say? Does it even matter? And do their opinions imply something to you? On the finish of the day, so long as you’re completely satisfied… I do know I’ve plenty of little women which can be following me, so I really feel prefer it’s necessary to indicate them “Hey! You can do that! In case you fall, you’re going to get again up” and hold pursuing it.

V: You’re actually lively on social media and as you talked about, you’re tremendous conscious of what you submit and who’s consuming your content material. How do you employ social media to advance your profession or create a group?

JN: I undoubtedly attempt to use it for the nice. To start with, as a result of I used to be modifying and posting skate movies extra typically, that’s sort of how I gained an viewers. I began to do women’ skate clinics again dwelling. Then I began to do nonprofit work with Skate Rising which was educating the youth. I’ve been in a position to put it to use to additionally do fundraisers and raffles and attempt to donate to good causes, so it’s been very useful in that means by way of getting folks collectively, having fun with ourselves and studying one thing new, but additionally utilizing it to present again to the group. For instance, we did somewhat fundraiser and I reached out to all these totally different manufacturers for donations and my followers purchased raffle tickets to win these baskets. We raised two grand so we purchased tents for the homeless. I believe that social media has been actually good for networking and work however now I attempt to simply use it for extra private portfolio stuff, simply placing work on the market that I’m doing and in addition making an attempt to do stuff for the group.

V: That’s superb that you simply’re ready to make use of your platform for the larger good. I really feel like your future is tremendous brilliant and you’ve got so many doorways open together with your artwork, skateboarding and performing — I’m excited to see! What’s subsequent for you creatively and principally what can we count on from you in 2021 and past?

JN: I’m really making an attempt to push myself into studying extra performing strategies and getting higher with dialogue. A buddy requested me to take part in somewhat quick sequence so we really filmed some stuff and we’re engaged on filming some extra episodes after which pitching that so we’ll see the place that goes.

V: Adore it.

JANTHAVY: That’s been enjoyable, it’s very totally different for me. I’m simply going to attempt to push myself in that sense and put myself on the market for jobs I’m most afraid of. (laughs) Which is normally precise performing performing that doesn’t contain skating however studying the right way to categorical feelings. I’m additionally engaged on getting a jewellery enterprise along with my buddy. We’re going to collaborate and promote extra earrings and no matter else we will make. I’m going to push myself extra with skating as a result of I acquired snug so I need to attempt to study extra and return to vert skating. I’m simply making an attempt to advance in each single means — in my sport, in my profession and sort of see the place it goes. I’ve no huge image however I’m undoubtedly working in direction of it.

V: Yeah! They stated you appeal to what you’re meant to draw.

JANTHAVY: Proper? That’s what I’m listening to. So I’m like “Okay! I’ll wait and see!”.

Credit: CREDITS: MAKEUP ELIE MAALOUF / HAIR PATRICIA MORALES (THE VISIONARIES) FOR GARNIER FRUCTIS / SET DESIGN ENOCH CHOI / EXECUTIVE PRODUCER SACHA DI BONA (SAVVIE) / PRODUCTION MANAGER ANDERSON (SAVVIE) / ON-SET PRODUCER LUIZA FARBER (SAVVIE) / DIGITAL TECHNICIAN ANTHONIE GONZALEZ / STYLIST ASSISTANTS HUNTER CLEM, ALI GRUSELL / PRODUCTION ASSISTANT HUNTER BERNARDI / LOCATION CONCRETE STUDIOS

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workingontruth · 4 years

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Part 7 of 7: The Gospel (In Full)…Stage 5; Fuel Us

August 22, 2020

[Forgive Me. Fill Me. Surrender Me. Command Us. FUEL US.]

In reaching this final stage of this Gospel (in Full) idea, I’m reminded of the impetus behind its formation.

In short, it’s my attempt at luring both new and life-long believers into a deeper walk with the God who saved them – an ongoing walk. I suppose it’s been my version of a call to an increasing emphasis on discipleship within the Body…especially the foundational aspects of our new life in Christ.

And not that I want to take anything away from this final “Fuel Us” stage before even unpacking it, but I must say I am very excited about what comes next – a practical way to begin the discipleship process by means of a life-giving dive into the origins of this new life we have been gifted! It’s going to be called The Story of Your Life - A 1st Step of Discipleship. For if our reborn soul is to be rooted beyond a surface-deep acceptance of our Savior, we must know the magnificent truths which anchor our new life! With scriptural truths in the arsenal, our new life in Christ will be protected with the shield of faith with which we can “extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one” who seeks our impotence and, if possible, destruction (Ephesians 6:16).

But for now, as I ponder this final “Fuel Us” stage of The Gospel (in Full), I am hesitating – lest I be misunderstood.

I believe the first thing to do is clearly qualify our objective by stating what this entry is not.

This fifth stage of The Gospel (in Full) is not going to be one that denies what the scripture tells us is already true of us.

In other words, because we know the “fuel” of the Holy Spirit already lives within every believer who has placed his or her faith in Jesus Christ for salvation, we cannot make this “Fuel Us” stage about dancing around on hot coals or chanting indistinct gibberish in order to wake the Spirit into action at our beckoned call.

While those characterizations may be a bit much, my point is this;

The very Spirit of the living God is not something we manipulate or convince to move when we are ready, as if for the sake of an experience. Rather, He is someone who has promised to come into our lives (Rev. 3:20) upon repentance for our sins, remain with us forever (Deut. 31:6,8, Matt. 28:20, Psalm 94:14), and guide us into increasing obedience as we walk with Him.

What’s more, He is King. We are his commandable (Stage 4) subjects. And his timing and reach are supreme into each of our lives. Our role is to humbly seek and love him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30), hold to his precepts (John 14:5, 15:10, 1 Jn 5:3) and live daily in a faith that demonstrates our trust in him.

While a unique movement of the Holy Spirit may, on occasion, be part of our personal experience with God, we must not anticipate that goosebumps, visions or miraculous healings are primary evidences of his fueling us – for he has already promised us that he will strengthen, help and uphold us with his mighty right hand (Is. 41:10). Our marching orders come from Jesus, our Commanding Officer. And his Word is our playbook.

As we walk in step with his playbook, his Spirit living within will fuel us with everything we need as his children (Matt. 7:9-11).

But contrary to this order of things, I think many a believer today expects God to fuel us with something miraculous before we will move in a direction that may be anything less than comfortable.

“Surely,” we think, “if God desires that I do something for him, he’ll give me a burning bush experience that will give me what I need to walk in that thing with confidence and assurance.” Umm.

Perhaps the most overriding reality in which I live has become an utter awareness that I cannot know when or exactly how the Holy Spirit will show up in my or anyone else’s life to do his fueling work.

Said another way, I think many of us rely on our emotions to “detect” when the Holy Spirit is fully engaging with and leading us.

And therein lies the great challenge for many a lukewarm, low bar of expectation Christian today. Rather than reckoning upon and trusting by faith in who we are in Christ, and that we already possess the full resources of the King at our disposal (see 2 Peter 1:3-4 fleshed out in Chapter 11 of Set Free), we tend to move into places of trusting obedience only if “the mood strikes us” and we’re feeling empowered for a given request of God.

But this kind of living is more a reliance on our own “power of positive thinking” or an attitude of self-resourcing confidence than it is biblical Christianity!

Instead, what brings activation to the Spirit of God is usually our boldness in obedience first, lived into as a result of our faith and trust in whom God says we are.

He usually asks us to step onto the surface of the water before he delivers the ability to walk on it. And I think sometimes we get it the wrong way around. As Christians, we must learn to move in obedience, knowing his fueling authority and indwelling power will show up to sustain us with each new step of obedience.

So, in clarifying our objective for this “Fuel Us" stage of The Gospel (in Full), while the Holy Spirit absolutely lives in us and is to be recognized for who He is, God in us, we must not be led to seek or gain possession of a technique intended to “wake a sleeping giant” (pardon the crude analogy) or to seek an experience purposed to make us feel as though we are fueled and ready for service unto God.

And yet, we know we must have such power and resourcing to live the Christian life!

After a month or two of coming to Christ (or a day or two) most of us quickly realize we do not have it within ourselves to live the Christian life. Eventually, we realize it must be the same authoritative power who brought us to new life who will also enable us to live daily in the Christian life. And the great news is that it is not left to us to live this life in Christ! For Jesus has already given us, as 2 Peter 1:3-4 says, everything we need that pertains to life and godliness. We just have a hard time remembering our part of the process – we have a hard time playing follow the Leader.

And so going into this fifth ongoing stage of the Gospel, I just want to encourage you.

When you wake up in the morning, it’s not, “Okay, God you did all the work to get me here. Today I’ve got to go do all the work now to make it happen.”

No. The Christian life is not a self-improvement plan. We do not have the power in and of ourselves to follow through on this brand-new life. And we don’t have to because Christ is offering you the grace you need today to follow and obey him in everything he is calling you to do.

And so as we are obeying, as we are following, we just continue to say to him;

“God, give me the grace and give me the faith to believe that, in me, you’re going to supply the power I need to be the person you want me to be.

And this happens when we are rooted in him…which takes us to our playbook.

One of the best sources of the wonderful truth that the fuel for living the Christian life is not a matter of our willpower, is found in Paul’s letter to the Colossians. In Chapter 2:6ff, we find God’s plan for us as ones seeking to live and walk with him.

In short, the same supernatural Spirit who walked us TO Christ will also enable us to walk out our new life IN Christ!

“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him…” – Col. 2:6

Of course, this verse begs the question, “How did we receive Christ Jesus as Lord?”

For that answer, go to Paul’s reminder for us in Ephesians 2:8-9. This tells us that we received him by grace through faith, not as a result of works so that none of us can boast.

So if we didn’t get Christ by works that we could boast about, we’re not going to walk in Christ by works that we can boast about.

No, we walk with him in the same way we received him that first day! And that is by grace, through faith. Of course, it is our responsibility to willfully follow Jesus in obedience – to electively choose to follow and obey him. But the power is not us. The power is Christ in us.

This is made clear in the final verse of Colossians 1 where Paul reminds us of the following:

“For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me.” – Col. 1:29

In the context of the closing verses in the first chapter of Colossians, the his and he is none other than Christ himself! This should give us great confidence and assurance. Praise God we are not alone! He will never ask us to pull ourselves up from the bootstraps. When we get to heaven, Jesus will not reminisce about how he checked in on you periodically, and commend you for your resourcefulness.

So again, Jesus is offering you the grace you need today to follow and obey him in everything he is calling you to do. The very power, back to Colossians 2:6, that drew you to Christ and made you a new creation, is the same power source you possess to walk in him. And that happens when we are rooted in him, as it says in the next line – in verse 7.

So it’s not about what’s above the surface – that’s the Instagram culture we live in. “Here’s my best life…on the best day…with the best filter!”

That’s not what real spiritual growth and maturity looks like. Spiritual growth and maturity looks like what’s under the surface. It’s that hidden walk. It’s that hidden time in the Word. It’s what we’re doing right now. It’s putting roots down deep into the person of Christ, the work of God, the love of God so that up from those roots comes that sustaining grace, that sustaining life of Jesus that powers us through every day. That’s what happens after you’ve put your faith and trust in Jesus.

So if we’re rooted in Christ, what does that do for us? Let’s go to verses 9 and 10:

“For in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority.”

Do you know what that means for us today? It means that you and I have all we need in Christ to do everything God has called us to do.

We’re not just nobody’s in the Kingdom of God. It’s not like we’re beggars looking for scraps to fall off the table of heaven, or that we’re “just a sinner saved by grace.” I hear people say that all the time! It sounds great. It sounds humble. Sounds like I’m putting myself in my right place. But we’re not “just sinners saved by grace!”

We are sinners who have been brought from death to life in the power of Jesus Christ and have been given, in Christ, access to the fullness of God!

So God wants you to start your day – to walk into circumstances and situations not feeling like you’re at the back, but feeling like,

“I have access to the fullness of God in Christ! I have a power source in me right now.”

Don’t ever forget what we talked about earlier in our contemplations of The Gospel (in Full)...you are a new creation! You don’t live in the impotence of an only fleshy man or woman. The old you has been killed off, buried, and your new miraculous life in Christ has given you access to the fullness of God in Christ!

And then, still in Colossians 2, going on from verse 11 we get a picture of this truth. He says our new existence is the same as the resurrection of Jesus Christ. When you put your faith in Jesus, it’s as if the old you passed away and a brand new you has come to life. When Christ went into the grave, Paul is saying, you went into it with him. All the power that was over you and your old way of life went down into that grave with Him. But when He came out of the grave, the same power that brought Him out of the grave, brought you out of the grave too!

O REJOICE Christian!

So, we have access today to supernatural power. Your life is now a supernatural life – not in some code you have to figure out or some technique for channeling your inner confidence, but in the person of Jesus Christ.

I love what Tim Keller says about the impossibility of our living the Christian life in the strength of the old, natural man. In Chapter 11 of King’s Cross, he says this…

“Christians, you see, are people who know that their Christianity is impossible, a miracle – there’s nothing natural about it…”

We must be people who know that our Christianity is impossible in the eyes of a secularist culture. There’s nothing natural about Christianity – not the initial act of salvation, and certainly as well not the life we are called to live as an act of worship after our salvation!

Read those last two sentences again.

But I don’t want us to think we have no role in this life as believers. We do have a role to play.

As I said earlier, we must choose to walk in obedience – to make conscious choices that line up with who God says we are now as his children, citizens of heaven but living on earth. But in order to live the life of a true Christian, one bearing evidence of our newness in Christ, we must position ourselves to be the recipients of his blessing and power and authority. What do I mean by that?

We cannot make God move in our lives, but we can make room for Him to move.

What we can do is take roadblocks out of the way that have a tendency to quench his ability or willingness to move with authority in our lives. Mark 6:1-6 is a good indicator of this truth. Our hearts can only long for, and our new lives be empowered to do, what the Holy Spirit desires if we are out of the way.

But how do we do this?

Well there’s both good news and bad news there. The bad news is that we cannot. We cannot remove ourselves from the scene of action. The good news is that He can. And He has!

I think the best way to set ourselves aside, setting the table for the Holy Spirit to move with less encumbrance in our lives, is to have a deep and personal knowledge of how the miracle of our new birth came to be.

Once we have come to an accurate knowledge of our access to God, and HOW that access came about, we will then have something firm onto which to hold as we become his disciples.

And I believe this knowledge and awareness must be one of the very first orders of business for the new believer in Christ, so that The Gospel (in Full) can, as Billy Graham says, “reform, conform, and transform us into obedient followers” of God.

Whew! What a journey we’ve been on!

In our first introduction to The Gospel (in Full), we proposed that “the Gospel is as much about our life in Christ as it is news about how to come to Christ.” Now, having explored our five ongoing stages of the Good News - Forgive Me, Fill Me, Surrender Me, Command Us, and Fuel Us, you know what’s behind each of these reflections for our living into our newness.

But if you’d like to enter a deeper study that will help you extinguish the flaming arrows Satan throws at you as he attempts to defeat you in your new life as a follower of Jesus Christ, if you want some ammunition of your own, stay tuned.

The Story of your Life - A 1st Step of Discipleship class will be in session soon.

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