#lesbian loneliness

[princessefemmelesbian]

Lesbians who don't know anybody like themselves, don't have lesbian friends or family members, or don't have lesbian girlfriends, I love you and you are not alone. I hope we can all find someone who is just like us, who helps us feel like we belong, who helps us feel less isolated.

#lesbian #positivity #lesbian loneliness #op

[lostryu]

i need gay rights because literally not a single self-proclaimed cis/het 'ally' understands the alienating experience that comes with being the only gay person in the workplace.

i am a gnc butch lesbian. i use he/him pronouns. when i came out to my manager regarding my pronouns (i had been an open lesbian since the moment of my hire), she told me that she supported me, but she could not enforce or ask our clients to use the correct pronouns for me. she told me it was something i would have to learn to deal with. she never uses the correct pronouns for me unless a person from a different department (who also happens to be LGBT+) is present. she is our HR in addition to manager.

none of my coworkers in my department ever remember to use my pronouns. if i remind them, they go over the top with the "im sorry's" and the "im still learning" and "you know i try my hardest's!" and "i swear im not homophobic!", it has been over 6 months since i came out. if i say nothing, they continue to use she/her (unless that other lgbt+ person from the other department is present, then they miraculously get it right).

sometimes they call me 'girl'. they always flounder and correct to "man-boy-uh youknowwhatimeanright". they laugh it off. they never bother to ask what terms i am comfortable with, or if i even cared in the first place. they don't care about my gender, they never bother to ask. somehow the subject gets changed every time i try to tell them, or set a boundary.

once in a while in a slow shift, the conversation will hop to our dating lives. somehow, it always jumps to how men suck and how dating a woman must be so much easier. they wish they could be gay and not straight. every time, they'll stare at me expectantly, like i am an animal at the zoo. no matter what i say, positive or negative, i must be lying. i cannot be that happy in my relationship, or if i have any issues, they must be minor. if i say 'why don't you try dating a girl then' to their remarks, they'll laugh, say something like "there is no way i possibly could" with that special tone of disguised disgust.

i am a prop, at work. they tell me about how much they love their kids. how they could bring anyone home and they wouldn't care. "they could be black, brown, or purple," they'll say "it could be a woman or a man! I support gay rights!" Then they will talk about how hungry they are, and how they will be going to Chick Fil a for the 4th time this week. 'as a treat'. it is thursday. they talk about going to Hobby Lobby again for christmas decorations, or another sale. sometimes i think i can taste blood.

its june. they talk about the pride parade and how excited they are to see the queens and their 'funny costumes'. they talk about how fun it is to go and watch, how they like the free things the corporations hand out. they don't want to bring their younger kids though. they're not old enough. they do not know that the first pride was a riot. they do not know what happened during the AIDS crisis, how many died. they don't really care when i try to tell them, they'd rather focus on the fun parts of the parade. the spectacle.

i wear a pronoun pin, to make it easier. still somehow no one can get my pronouns right. a client notices it. commends me for "being brave" and "coming out." she never uses my correct pronouns. i stopped wearing the pin after the 11th person asked me if my name on my name tag was my real one, and after the 45th person went out of their way to use incorrect pronouns every sentence. my manager, the HR, did not care.

i need gay rights, but somehow everything got resolved when they allowed us to marry in 2015. to our allies, the work is done. somehow i am left more alone than when we started.

#lost.txt #lesbian loneliness #like idk how to describe it but it sure is loneliness and alienation #somewhat of a vent post #like yes we have made it so far #but our 'allies' have grown very complacent #in their own support and ideology #reminder that being gay is still considered spectacle

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

Source: Women Together; Portraits of Love, Commitment, and Life - Essays by Mona Holmlund , Photography by Cyndy Warwick

#gay marriage #lesbian wedding #lesbian positivity #lesbian loneliness #lesbian love #lesbian history #image #photo #lgbt #lesbian #personal

[dont-let-me-live]

Being a lesbian is so lonely. I am 20 years old. In college. I interact with friends of the LGBT community all the time. Yet, I have never met a fellow lesbian even though I came out 4 years ago. How is that even possible? Like sure there are bisexual women that I have met, became friends with, can date and have dated but its so different to have a partner that can fully understand your experience. Growing up lesbian is so lonely.

I yearn for someone I can share that kind of experience with. I want to just even TALK to a fellow lesbian my age, dating is optional. I just want to meet somebody who understands what its like. The only lesbian I knew growing up was a distant severely alcoholic aunt.

I want someone so bad. I want to be understood.

#lgbt #lesbian #lgbtq #lgbtqia #les4les #les4bi #butch lesbian #masc lesbian #femme lesbian #butch4femme #butch4butch #lesbian yearning #lesbian loneliness

[beneaththefloorboards]

To my fellow lesbians: I have found something even more lonely than the experience of being around your friends while they're all talking about men.

Let me tell you what happened

I never expected to experience this, as I am the only lesbian I know and while I have plenty of sapphic friends, none of them have ever been in a serious relationship with a woman. That in itself makes me feel quite isolated. But the other day I went to this event that I was so excited for, you see: it was a ball!! A real gothic/victorian/dark academia esque ball in an old art museum with classical music and ballroom dancing!! I was beyond excited and it was a perfect evening, and my heart was elated when I saw how many wlw were there attending... until I realised they were all there as couples.

Except for a few friend groups I was the only single lesbian.

In a room full of wlw couples.

And my heart was so torn. I was so happy for them, for a lot of them were much younger than me and to think that they already knew who they were and were able to date freely (unlike I who repressed my sexuality until I was 23). But I was also hit by this enormous wave of sadness. Of loneliness.

And I wanted to share this story here because, again, I am the only lesbian I know. And I doubt my friends will understand exactly the feeling I was feeling that day. Of being in a room full of people who share your experience for the first time, but at the same time feeling so lonely because you repressed who you are for so long and so you're suddenly overcome with so much longing and jealousy and regret 🖤💀

#personal story #lesbian #wlw #gothic aesthetic #melancholic #lesbian loneliness #lesbian yearning #sapphic yearning #ramblings

[petrichorletters]

I want so desperately to say some words of affection, but my roses inside my chest will grow back as thorns before I be able to say "I love you" again.

#romance #tumblr writers #wriblr #writing #art #creative writing #love #breakup #lesbian #lesbian poetry #lesbian loneliness #lgbtqia #lgbtq #emotionally damaged #emotionally unavailable

[yourehotcupcakke]

my sexuality pipeline be like

straight (?) > 100% bisexual > lesbian!? > lesbian... > LESBIAN > ... bisexual? > lesbian > bisexual?¿ > lesbian

#lesbian #lgbtq #queer #gay #lgbt #comphet #lesbian loneliness #lesbians

[marciies]

lesbian loneliness is kicking my ass tonight good god

#yearning for relationships that i feel like i might never have and having to grapple with that constantly #both platonic and romantic #lesbian #lesbian loneliness #lesbian yearning #text

[princessefemmelesbian]

Being a lesbian under patriarchy is something else entirely y'all. You don't realize how deeply women are encouraged to center men, to please men, to revolve their worth and existence around men, until you come out as a lesbian yourself, and only because you realize that you'll never be any of those things, and how the patriarchy inherently devalues you because of it.

So to all you lesbians out there, whether you're in the closet, coming out, or are suffering from comphet and don't even realize you're lesbians yet, I see you, I love you, and you are not alone. Hang in there, darling, because we will make it through.

#lesbian #lesbophobia #patriarchy #misogyny #androcentrism #feminism #lesbian loneliness #op

[gayforminatozaki]

my bi friend got offended at someone asking if she was a lesbian. I guess I forgot how disgusting people find it.

#she complained about it to me knowing fully well im a lesbian #i am so tired #lesbian #lesbophobia #idk what to tag this i just hate how lonely it is being a lesbian #omg i forgot to tag #lesbian loneliness

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

Source: Letters to Women , by alta

#lesbian loneliness #alta #lesbian zine #lesbian history #lesbian poetry #feminist history #personal

[sadcanofpeaches]

whenever i actually think a little bit longer about how lgbt community went from being a safe space for lesbians from straight men, to literally putting straight men on a pedestal and making them a leading voice in spaces dedicated for bi and lesbian women makes me so so fucking sick. this is literally fucking insane. the 14 year old me who discovered this community online years ago and finally felt less alone would feel even more alone and more suicidal if i was 14 today and discovered online lgbt community the way it is right now. it would make me realize that you just can't escape straight men chasing after us, fetishizing our sexuality and sexually harrassing us. i, a girl who grew up in a country and in a family where gay/bi people and kids are treated like shit, harassed, beaten and bullied till they kill themselves would realize that even online among these people who claim to be like you, accept you and love you, you will be treated similarly for the same reason, with the only difference that a men who will do this to you will be wearing a wig

how the hell did that happen

#radfems do touch #radfems please touch #lesbians please touch #lesbian loneliness #radfem safe #radblr

[sapphos-darlings]

i dont know if im just being dramatic or whatever, but being wlw seems so lonely to me. everywhere i look i have such a low chance of meeting a bi woman, and practically no chance of meeting a fellow lesbian. i dont know if its just the fact of me living in a tiny conservative country or what, but god do i wish more women were wlw, its so isolating having no one who is like you around :/

Dear Anon, you are not being dramatic. I feel like that sometimes too.

Lesbian loneliness is definitely something real and specific to us. I so wish we had more of happy things to bond over, but you are going through something your fellow lesbian sisters across the world also have felt like.

I'm lucky to live in a Nordic country, so I won't pretend to be able to fully relate to your situation, but I can say this: There are as many bi women and lesbians where you live as in my country. We are everywhere, we will never go away, and you are never as alone as you might feel. In moments of deep loneliness, I remember all those women in history who were able to find each other and be together against all odds. You can find them from books and movies. Even today, all over the world, women like us find each other and make connections.

In fact, most LGBT people I know have just sort of found each other, as if gravitating naturally towards each other. I'm sure you too will find those circles, those places and hobbies where we just happen to be. There are more of us than it feels.

I know meeting people in real life is priceless, but you should also take advantage of the internet. Make connections here, anonymously if your safety demands so (no photographs, burner email, VPN, nickname and avatar with no connection to your other social media accounts etc). You'll find likeminded women, hope and advice, perhaps even from your own country no matter how small or conservative it is. Hell, years ago I followed here on tumblr a lesbian from Bahrain, and she finally managed to move out of her country. I also advice you to scroll our #ask tag. I remember at least one Saudi lesbian Sade replied to with a lot of thought and help.

You are not alone, Anon! There's hope and a future waiting for you!

-Lavender

#ask #lesbian loneliness #c: Lavender

[justanisabelakinnie]

Camilo: You couldn’t get a boyfriend.

Isabela: I’m lesbian.

Camilo: Oh, sorry…you couldn’t get a girlfriend.

#i’m sorry i just had to 😅 #isabela madrigal #isabela my beloved #isabela is best girl #camilo madrigal #encanto #encanto incorrect quotes #encanto headcanons #encanto queer headcanons #isabela madrigal is a lesbian #lesbian #lesbian loneliness

[yourehotcupcakke]

the 12 lesbians in question agree with me

#lesbian #gay #lgbtq #lesbians #lesbian loneliness

[tipsygnostalgix]

About lesbian loneliness,

When the conversation is about men (like most of the conversations I hear in my friend circle) and the type of men people love, crave and desire I always think that no one talks about me in that way, no one will want me like those people desire those men. I feel envy and jealousy but I also feel ignored, unseen and not appreciated. I wonder when will it be my turn to be desired. Not that I want to be desired by those people in particular but by at least someone, and I'm not asking someone to be in love with me or anything strong, just being someone's type, someone's crave for at least a moment so that I wouldn't feel so bitter all the time for being me.

#lesbian loneliness #nonbinary lesbian #negative #bitterness about my gender #rant #thoughts about lesbianism #mine