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halliewriteshockey · 2 years

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An open letter

After much deliberation, I have made the decision to change the spelling of my surname from Grey to Gray. Here's why:

Many of you are familiar with the issues I’ve had surrounding a woman named Michaela Grey, who took my choice of pen name as a personal affront to her. Over the past ten years, she has doggedly clung to her misguided belief that I ‘stole’ her name and that my decision to use it was an attack on her.

I’m changing my name to Gray not because of this individual, but in spite of her. I know I have every right to use the name Grey, and nothing she says or does changes that fact. But over the last decade, it’s become increasingly clear this person is unable to be reasoned with. Since I first became aware of her existence, she has engaged in increasingly hostile behavior. She’s called me names, accused me of identity theft, and spread disgusting lies about me and what I write in attempts to discredit me. She’s recruited her friends to likewise attack me, often en masse, repeating the same vicious rumors and insulting everything about me. One of the most common themes, repeated by everyone who’s targeted me, is how bad my writing is, and how I’m a laughable excuse for an author. Another running theme is that I write ’horse porn’, a reference to my very first book, which no longer exists but had horses in it. (No equines got it on, though.)

Ms. Grey has sent me malware through spam in multiple attempts to infect my computer. She has doxxed me on Twitter. She has claimed I’m altering my appearance in an attempt to more closely resemble her and thus assume her identity. She's accused me of willingly perpetuating her childhood trauma as if I had any idea what her life was like. She’s spread lies and vicious gossip, and even reported the recent fundraiser I held during my medical issues as fraudulent in hopes I’d be forced to pay back all the funds or face charges.

She has stalked, harassed, and bullied me for the past ten years, and even though I know I’ve done nothing wrong, it’s increasingly obvious she’s only escalating. I do not wish my name to be tied to such an unpleasant, toxic individual. She cannot be reasoned with, and has shown repeatedly just how low she’s willing to go on her vicious crusade against me.

Thus, not because she asked me (she didn’t), but because I want nothing to do with her, I have decided to alter the spelling of my last name. Obviously this will be a complicated process. I have to change my name on all my books, including the cover art, and every iteration of it currently online. This will take quite some time. I have changed my display name to Michaela Gray on Twitter and Tumblr, but my username of greymichaela will remain the same on both sites. I’ve built a fan base under that brand and I refuse to let a single individual destroy everything I’ve created.

However, any new social media will be under the name graymichaela instead. If Ms. Grey had ever come to me as equals and said, “it makes me uncomfortable that you’re using my name, and I would appreciate it if you would consider changing it,” I would have listened. I’m not the ‘fucking asshole’ she says I am. I’m willing to be reasonable, and I work hard to be approachable. But she never did that. Instead she chose a vindictive campaign of harassment and abuse from the very jump, as if it were personally targeted at her instead of a stupid coincidence.

She’ll probably think she’s ‘won’. That’s okay. I don’t care what she thinks, and if her narrative needs to twist the facts until she’s the hero and I’m the villain, that’s not something I can control.

I’m working four jobs to make ends meet. My son just got out of the hospital for suicidal intent. My daughter has severe health issues and no diagnosis yet. I’m a single mother raising three children with no help and no respite, and the last thing I need is more drama in my life.

Hence, from here on out, my name is Michaela Gray. I have no affiliation with, nor do I want anything to do with, the individual named Michaela Grey. Any further attacks from her or her friends will be reported to the authorities, along with all the evidence of her decade-long harassment campaign that I’ve been collecting for years.

Thank you for reading

#Michaela speaks #Michaela Grey

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aspiringhexgirl · 10 months

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Michaela Stark, plus size Di Pesta models, Lizzo, random mid size to plus size women on ig and pinterest, fat women with hip dips, you will always be famous to me

#she speaks #di pesta #michaela stark #lizzo #<3

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scienceandfandoms · 2 years

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If I had a nickel for every time Michaela Dietz has played a magical being from another world that has grown comfortable with living on Earth before others from their world and also can shapeshift in a children's animated series I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice

#steven universe #the owl house #the owl house spoilers #toh spoilers #amethyst #vee noceda #the owl house vee #michaela dietz #she speaks #scienceandfandoms

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pospoets · 10 months

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I have a side hyperfixation on this game

@michaelathisten THIS IS FOR YOUR AMAZING GAME

Also A fan oc below

I kind of tried to copy the game artstyle but it kind of failed?

#Like veins beneath the town #Michaela thisten #Like vines beneath the town #They watch from the Walls #The well speaks to me

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sncwonthebeach · 1 year

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TJ coming back this season just to find out that Olive replaced him with a less hot version of himself

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lovecharged · 1 year

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"i tell myself i don't care that much...but i feel like i die until I feel your touch..." / @tkachukmatthew

#speaks: michaela sánchez.#tkachukmatthew

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constellationclarke · 1 year

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Not me starting One True Loves yesterday, having no idea it was getting an adaptation and finishing it today only to see a trailer be released!

#all i care about is phillipa soo as emma and michaela fuckin conlin as marie !!!!!!!!#one true loves #andreia speaks

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hypertextdog · 10 days

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YOU -- mm i want a fat man on me gaystyle but with clothes on

FURRY INCLINATION [Medium: Success] -- Any *animalline traits* to him, two-legs?

SENSATION -- That would do nicely, texturally speaking...

YOU -- not for now, but i'll keep that in mind.

POSTER'S GAMBIT [Easy: Success] -- Yes. YES. It's the perfect emotion. Everyone wants -- even if not that. So generalize, blogsman. Ambiguate. With this, you can finally build your *viral empire.*

BROAD APPEAL [Hard: Success] -- With your crowd: three faves, and a flirtatious re-blog from some fur-fag. Eight if the bitcoinette or the not-lycanthrope touches it...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Try again. We're *this* close to another "you have to let 'denny's parking lot at 3am' go."

YOU -- mm i want big men on me gaystyle #gay #mlm #lgbt #asexual

SENSATION [Medium: Success] -- But it's not about "big" -- "big" alone is nothing. Non descript. You crave *plasticity* -- you want to feel him pushing through, between your fingers...

FURRY INCLINATION -- Oh, yes. Sounds *sonft,* two-legs.

SENSATION -- *Really* sonft. If we must say it that way. And so *heavy* on our supine body, too. I almost wonder if we could...

New task: Administer the *auto-hand-job.*

SENSATION -- Yeah.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- NEVER MIND THEM. Never mind any of that. You're almost there. Keep going, blogsman. *Earn* the U.R.L.

BROAD APPEAL [Hard: Success] -- Thirteen faves, four reblogs. None flirtatious -- none you think.

YOU -- what's missing?

BROAD APPEAL -- What do you think?

YOU [Impossible: Success] -- the *sapphic* factor.

BROAD APPEAL -- Exactly right. I *told* you I'm named this way for a reason...

HIGH SCHOOL G.S.A. -- Do it for Erin. And Michaela. I wonder if they're still...

BROAD INTUITION [Medium: Success] -- They're not.

YOU -- mm i want big men or women on me #lgbt #ambiguously queer

HIGH SCHOOL G.S.A. -- Ah-ah-ah.

BROAD APPEAL -- And about that word "big" ... you know what has to happen.

YOU -- but that's the core of it to me, kind of.

POSTER'S GAMBIT [Easy: Success] -- And to the fur-fag sector.

BROAD APPEAL -- A sector is nothing. We want the *website* in our hands. Even the proponents of Astarion, and the proprietors of "best girls"...

YOU -- Yuck.

BROAD APPEAL -- I know. But they're the only way.

VANITY [Easy: Failure] -- God, we'll be on *Ellen.*

BROAD APPEAL -- Enough of that. She's out.

YOU [Impossible: Success] -- mm i want anything at all #lgbt #ambiguously queer #asexual

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- STOP THERE. YOU'VE FOUND IT, BLOGSMAN. QUICKLY -- BEFORE WE BOTH FORGET -- TYPE IT UP AND POST.

BROAD APPEAL -- The known numbers don't go high enough. You've found a ticket out of here -- out of *Massachusetts.*

SHIVERS -- IN 2027, A METEOR THE SIZE OF A KLEAN KANTEEN WILL LAND IN THE CENTER OF ROXBURY AND LEVEL BOSTON WITH ITS ZETTA-JOULES OF IMPACT ENERGY. TOO SMALL AND TOO QUICK FOR EVEN M.I.T.'S OBSERVATORY-BOYS TO DETECT.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- More important things than that are happening -- and sooner, too. Type it up, blogsman. This is the easy part...

YOU -- You type: "mm i want anything at all #lgbt #ambiguously queer #asexual."

SENSATION [Hard: Success] -- Stop. Go back. It's dishonest.

BROAD APPEAL -- This was never about you -- you were only ever the basis on which *this* could be constructed. If that...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Post it, blogsman. Make the world relate to you.

YOU -- You hit: "post."

YOU -- The progress bar reaches -- reaches -- completes. A green light indicates success.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- YES. YES... Oh, I suppose we should have waited for *optimum posting hours.* It doesn't matter now. It's done -- and the onslaught faves will begin rolling in catastrophically in three... two...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- In three... two...

Thought gained: Any day now...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Don't worry, blogsman. Just keep checking your phone -- the *wi-fi* here is *bunk,* anyway.

VANITY -- And once it does -- Ellen.

#disco elysium

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dreamofstarlight · 2 years

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Every time I read the vanity fair article on Andrew and Kerry’s relationship I notice something that makes me hate him even more

#apparently at a campaign event #toddler michaela interrupted it by walking where he was speaking #and he joked about being ‘upstaged by a kennedy’#and would kinda jokingly say that his kids has kennedy mannerisms #but it was obvious he was a little annoyed

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junhui-png · 1 month

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Starring: love ˙✧˖📷 ⋆｡ ˚

actor!jeonghan x fem!reader

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Summary: You always had trouble finding love, but that never bothered you as you like to be independent. You had opened a cafe on Main Street all by yourself and was things were going great without a boyfriend so you simply thought “who needs a boyfriend anyways?” ? But that changed once you had met the man of everyone’s dream, Yoon Jeonghan.

Notes: I'm finally cured from write block, and I felt like writing something else besides "Puppy Love' but dont worry I haven't abandoned it, like I promised it's coming back in may but till then please enjoy this short series!

Warnings: Cursing and thats really it…

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"Order for Michaela!" Your voice boomed over the chattering of your customers. It was a Friday and you hadn't had the least of doubt that it was going to be busy that morning. You opened up a cozy cafe on Main street with your best friend, Lee Seokmin, who you've known since Highschool, and your part timers, Kim Chaewon and Lee Sohee who have also been with you since the store had first opened. "y/n I'm gonna clock out in a bit ok?" Chaewon taps on your shoulder and you give her a slight nod. You continue to serve and take orders till closing time, were you, Seokmin, and Sohee were closing up the shop. "Imma head out first, see ya'll tomorrow!" Seokmin flashes his signature golden smile while walking out the front door, waving us goodbye. You and Sohee finish cleaning up the cafe shortly after Seokmin's depature and make your way towards your apartment complex "You know Yoon Jeonghan?" Sohee speaks up "No..?" You reply "Of course you don't your a fuckin old hag" Sohee says with a sigh, continuing to scroll through his phone "God, you kids are so disrespectful now a days" You scoff, grabbing a hold of his neck and tug at the back of his neck, causing him to yell out in pain "thats what you get you brat" you chuckle, Sohee takes a few steps away from you, for safety measures. "But like I was saying, He's apparently coming to New York to film a drama" He says, a hint of excitement laced through his voice "Sohee, New York is big, what are the possibilities that he's going to be filming anywhere near main street?" Sohee lets out a sigh at your down putting response "Wow thanks alot." His tone sarcastic. You both make it to your apartment complex before parting ways. You open the door to your apartment and immedtaly throw your bag to the side and remove your shoes. Your quick to change into your pajamas and brush you teeth etc. You got into bed, ready to go to sleep when your phone buzzes. "He might start filming this week" Read the text Sohee had sent you. You let out a "tsk" in response and simply send him a thumbs up emoji before heading to bed.

The next morning you changed into your usually work attire, a simple white button up with a pair of cream colored dress pants. You wear your favorite pair of white sneakers and grab your bag before leaving your apartment. Once you make it to the front of your apartmen Sohee is already outside, waiting for you. Sohee lives only a few stories apove your apartment, which was also how you had met him before the opening of your cafe. You and Sohee begin the short walk over to your cafe. Both you and Sohee's phones light up from a text sent in your groupchat. "What the hell is going on" Chaewon had sent with a photo of a bunch of vans and camera and people crowding main street "What's happening?" Sohee only shrugs in response as you continue your way to work, only a little faster this time. Once you had arrived at the cafe both Chaewon and Seokmin rushed up to the two of you "Whats going on?" Sohee asks, glaring over at the chaos to the left of the cafe "I think there filming something" Seokmin says, pointing out that the people who were rushing around were all wearing shirts that read "Staff" on the back. With that, Sohee gasps, catching you all off guard "Yoon Jeonghan!" He shrieks and you all whip your head over towards the set to see a beautiful man with long luscious black hair that reached down to about his shoulder and a tall and slender build. His aura soft yet powerful, his delicate features complimenting everything about him. “Wow.." he truly looked like an angel. "god he's beautiful" Chaewon's mouth basically hanging open as she watches the beautiful man "I told you!" Sohee shakes you out of your trance. "Ok guys let's just open up the shop, alright?" You fumble through your bag to find the keys to the store.

Today was even more busy then it had been yesterday and the four of you definitely all knew why. Yoon Jeonghan. But you didn't mind, after all it was just bring you in more money. The day went by quickly, people rushing in and out, customers complaining, and so one. Basically another normal day just five times more hectic. You begin to clean up around the store when you hear the bells from the front door go off "Welcome!" You shout, turning your customers service voice back on. You place the broom down and turn around, your eyes widen at the site in front of you. Yoon Jeonghan simply standing there, glancing over the menu above you. His hair put up into a ponytail, his bangs slightly coming undone in front of his face. You quickly fix yourself before rushing over to the cashier "What would you recommend?" His fixes his glance down to you, making eye contact. You immediately look down towards the register, feeling flustered. "Depends on what you like" You shrug, clearing your throat and looking back up at him and he nods "Maybe something sweet?" He says "How about a Vanilla latte?" You suggest "I'll take whatever you suggest" The beautiful man says, a small smirk on his lips. "Alright that will be $4.45" The man pulls out his card and hands it to you, which you swipe it through the reader "Your order will be out in a few minutes" You flash him a smile and he returns it "Take your time" You immediately get to work on his order when Chaewon and Sohee both come rushing to your side from the supply room "No way that just happened" Chaewon grabs onto your arm all giddy. "I think he wants you" Sohee giggles, shaking you for the second time today "Ya'll are too much, just go finish closing up" You roll your eyes and the two giggle before rushing off into the back. You place the cap on his order and place it on the pick-up table "Sir your order is ready" You call out and his head snaps up from his phone. He gets up and picks up the coffee giving you a smile "Thank you" his voice so sweet your heart was filled with warmth "Of course, please enjoy!" You return the smile. You watch as he walks towards the door and you turn back around to turn off the lights "Oh and also sorry for the bother outside" You turn around and Jeonghan is still standing there by the door. He points outside to the Vans and people by the side of your cafe "Don't worry about it, good luck on your shoot" Jeonghan takes one more look towards your before heading out. You turn off the lights and pack up. Once you walk out Sohee is there again, waiting for you "god he's so beautiful.." You let out a sigh, sensing a rant coming up "And first of all, This was the first time I've ever seen you flustered in like what 4 years which is actually insane" And just like that Sohee's rant began "I was so shocked you like never show any emotions besides like anger and just being calm I guess.” Sohee pauses and look at you for a second "I mean I'm not calling you some heartless freak but you kinda are" You roll your eyes at the kids honest statement "AND the way he looked at you, HELLO? That shit was for sure love at first sight" Sohee giggles like a middle school fangirl at the last part "Ok bud.." You say with sarcasm and he laughs "No I'm being serious, he was definitely tryna get your attention" Sohee begins once again "I'll take whatever you suggest" Sohee says, mimicking what Jeonghan had said earlier "I mean come on, he was definitely flirting" Sohee scoffs a bit at your at your very little knowledge of romance "First of all, I wasn't flustered and second he wasn't flirting he literally just didnt know what to get" You say but Sohee shakes his head. The two of you reach your apartment complex and say your goodnights before heading your separate ways. You enter your apartment and get ready to sleep, the thoughts of earlier replaying in your head and you giggle at the thought of what Sohee had said "What the hell.." You mumble to yourself. "What's up with you today?' You thought to yourself but you were to tired to think to much of it and just went to bed.

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halliewriteshockey · 2 years

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Hey y’all, I’m stepping away from social media for awhile. I’m not deactivating, but for my own mental health, I need a break. My shop (which has never been related to my pen name no matter what anyone says) is still active and I’m taking orders, so if you’d like a custom designed perfume or lotion, check it out! Otherwise I’ll see y’all later, probably when the season starts.

Much love to most of you! ❤️

#Michaela speaks

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aspiringhexgirl · 11 months

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if nobody got me i know Michaela Stark got me can i get an amen

#she speaks #Michaela Stark

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very-feral-lesbian · 1 year

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it happens in march of 1997.

eddie and steve walking down the road in boston, eddie's arm carrying a small bag of groceries and steve carrying a large bag of cat food to bring home to sabbath and babylon. they were bundled up in coats, still not used to the harsh winters in boston.

their grocery store was only a few blocks from their house, good for times like these when they came home from work to their cats empty bowls and an equally empty pantry, not ideal for the get-together they were hosting tomorrow night.

boston had been kind to them, living merely blocks from robin and nancy, and the kids were able to come and visit frequently. they got away from the upside down and all of its accompanying instability.

it also had the benefit of being gay-friendly. they had formed a close-knit group of several other neighborhood queers alongside nance and robin. and while they personally weren't super big fans of pda, it did allow them to walk down the streets holding hands, as they were now.

so it was usual thursday, until it wasn't.

"no way, steve harrington in the flesh?"

tommy fucking hagan here, in boston. god hawkins just does not let up.

steve becomes increasingly aware of eddie hand in his. it feels like it weigh 100 pounds. eddie must pick up on this as steve feels eddie drop his hand, going to tuck into his jacket pocket.

tommy looks older, he aged just like his dad. he doesn't look bad, he just aged. it's like steve is in a time warp, his brain truly comprehending for the first time that it's been twelve years since he graduated high school and ditched behind king harrington. since he was the steve that tommy knew.

"wow tommy, i uh- never would have, i mean what are you doing in boston? last i heard you were down in dallas "

tommy smiled, "yeah im here on vacation for a couple days with my," there's a pause "... with my partner."

he and eddie glanced over at each other, picking up on that word but no, he couldn't be.

"what a small world. i mean we- i," pause, grabbing eddie's hand, part of him hoping tommy doesn't notice and the other part begging him to, "we live just down the street. had to pick up some food for the girls," gesturing down to the cat food in his left hand.

tommy smiled wide, "it's so cool how walkable boston is. it's been so nice for the last few days, not sure michael could handle this weather year 'round though."

michael? not michelle or michaela? michael.... michael.

he felt eddie's hand squeeze his, clearly aware of steve's train of thought at the moment.

after 11 years together, eddie practically has a window into steve's brain which is why he speaks up for the first time, "yeah we love boston, despite the cold. if you and michael aren't busy, we are having a few friends over tomorrow night if you two want to join? i'm sure i'd be nice for steve and you to catch up."

steve was thankful for his boyfriend in this moment, "yeah that would be great tommy, it'd be nice to meet michael."

tommy smiled, "yeah we'd love to."

eddie rattled off their address and the time, tommy bidding his goodbyes, leaving steve and eddie walking back the short distance to their apartment.

steve still hadn't said much, eyes looking forward.

"you okay, babe?"

steve looked over at eddie, "is every fucking person from hawkins gay?"

eddie laughed at him, "valid point. although to be fair, as much as i love him, hopper is just about the straightest man i've ever seen."

there is now a part two here

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rogerdeakinsdp · 2 years

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Michaela Coel speaks onstage at the MCU Mega-Panel during 2022 SDCC on July 23, 2022 in San Diego, California

#michaelacoeledit #mcoeledit #michaela coel #marvelcastedit #flawlessbeautyqueens #chewieblog #dailywomen #edit #*#saw some bp2 gifs and was like MICHAELA COEL????#yeah they got to her #anyway what an outfit

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37sommz · 6 days

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✼. COME TO ITALY | 2015.

CH. 01. NOW PLAYING: dreams by the cranberries [fluff, angst]. ✼.⠀summary: prema saves michaela's career, 2.1k.

MICHAELA WAS NEVER GOOD AT SITTING STILL. Her mother used to scold her for the fidgety nature that seemed to plague the young girl when she would bounce around the doctor’s office or disrupt the teacher during storytime. Her father thought it was a good trait to have as a racer. He found it helpful that his daughter’s endless supply of energy allowed her the chance to spend many hours in their garage fixing up a broken kart or reviewing racing footage from that day. She would bounce around, spurting out corrections for her form, or her pace.

I’m breaking too late…

too early…

I’m much too wide…

that was a chance to overtake.

As hyperactive as she was, she was also incredibly self-critical. Her uncle always lamented she was much too focused on being perfect—in action, in talent, and in response—that she often missed her chances to celebrate. Her response was always the same, “For every single mistake I make, they give the same amount of grace to the boys on their 10th.” She reasoned that her perfection would eliminate any opportunity for the males in the sport to discredit her.

Not that they needed much opportunity.

✼.⠀OCTOBER 20, 2015 — surrey, england

“WE CANNOT GUARANTEE YOU A SEAT FOR NEXT SEASON.” That was what the team principal told her after she fell short of the rookie cup. Second to il Predestinato and his shiny Dutch car. Though Michaela was rarely still, she stood still in that moment. Staring up at the older Englishman’s eyes as he continued on with some excuse she had no interest in hearing.

It wasn’t until he delivered a short, “The team wishes you the best. We’re sure you’ll have your fair pick of teams to choose from next season.”

Bullshit.

She muttered to herself as she turned on her heels to leave without her famously permanent smile to comfort the older man.

“I outperformed those jerkoffs in every single race,” The words stormed into the silent room as Travis, her uncle and manager, stood across from her.

Approaching her with caution, he gently reached to grab her shoulders, pulling her in for a gentle hug. Meant to calm her, but it did anything but. After a beat, Michaela tore herself away from her uncle, a sigh emitting from his chest signaling to her he was just as frustrated as she was.

“Travis—”

He cut her off before she could say what they were both thinking. His eyes slowly tracked her movements as she paced from one end of the room to the other.

“Mickey, we both know that you outperformed Ryan and Gus. But let’s not pretend we don’t know what’s going on here.”

She scoffed at that, eyes rolling with angry disbelief as her arms found their way back into their pretzel over her chest. Travis, in his stubborn wisdom, continued speaking, “This is a test—”

“A test?”

She exclaimed, arms thrown from their place on her chest. Her head shook from one side to the other as Travis watched on with a subtle sympathy for his ambitious niece.

“They tested me all season.”

The words peaked in tone, hitting Travis’ ear with a sense of pain he hadn’t seen in the 15-year-old since she was back in Australia breaking the news over the phone that her father had been laid off.

“They gave me the least reliable car, they refused to protect me from the pricks who terrorized me off the track. Then, when I get a win in Germany—”

Her lips pursed together at the memory, stopping in the middle of her words to keep herself from crying.

“The only win between the three of us—”

Failure finds her, tears puddled in the corners of her eyes spill over.

“The engineers abandon me on the podium to talk strategy with the other two.”

“How many times do I need to prove that I’m just as,” Stopped to correct her words her head shook again, “...better than the boys?”

It’s Travis’ turn to fold his arms over each other. His head fell back against the door that stood behind his frame, too pained to watch Michaela fight to hold back the tears that kept flowing down the sides of her face. Their lips equally pursed as the silence filled the room once again.

This was what most of their conversations ventured into. That question of being enough tortured both of them, for admittedly different reasons, but the toll of it weighed upon their shoulders the same. It had been a question Michaela frequently asked her uncle, usually in jest, though revealing the depth of her insecurities just the same.

They both knew Travis would eventually have to offer her an answer.

One definitive so she would stop asking.

But Michaela would be lying if she tried to act as if she was naively unaware of the answer Travis fought back every time the question was posed.

She knew the answer was never.

She knew the answer would destroy her if confirmed by the one person who believed she was better than the boys. She knew the answer would tear down every step forward she took in the name of chasing the success she so desperately craved to taste.

So Travis didn’t answer. Neither of them was sure he ever would.

Instead, with his head pressed against the hardwood behind him, he offered up a solution. As he always did.

“We’ll call around in the morning like we always do. We’ll use every trick, every piece of leverage we have. I’m going to get you that seat. Doesn’t matter where, doesn’t matter how.”

When Michaela didn’t respond, his head broke away from its hold tipped back. His eyes met hers searching endlessly for a sliver of hope in her clouded brown eyes. The same eyes she shared with his older brother.

“C’mon Mickey—” He coaxed in an attempt to draw an emotion out of the teenager who stood before him. Any emotion would do in that moment. “I’ll make it happen. You believe me? Right?”

It must have been nearly a minute before she broke the staring contest she held over him. She shrugged her shoulders, arms folded over to offer a sense of comfort to her pained self.

“Yes?” Travis pushed once more, eyebrows raised in a way that reminded her of her father’s own instinctive heroism.

“Yeah.”

A nod was all he needed to cross the space over to her. With a shake of her shoulders, Michaela released the smallest of giggles. His paler hand ruffled at her curly hair, a move to diffuse the tension that hung between the two family members.

“Right,” He exhaled as his hand retreated to its place. “Let’s get out of this shithole.”

✼.⠀NOVEMBER 05, 2015 — london, england

“In a post to her blog, Susie Wolff has announced her formal retirement from Formula One.”

“The prospect of a female driver on the grid.”

“The events at the start of this year and the current environment in F1 the way it is, it isn't going to happen."

IN THE FEW WEEKS SINCE HER DROP FROM JAGONYA, MICHAELA HAD NOT LEFT HER RACING SIMULATOR IF NOT TO EAT OR SLEEP. The TV directly to her left was left on Sky Sports, news within the racing world kept her both alert and melancholy.

Paradoxically, it worried Travis, and his wife, just as much as it reassured them. The duality of the feeling pulled at their emotions as they witnessed the extent of Michaela’s worries that she wasn’t—and couldn’t be—as good as the boys. That’s what most of her hyperactivity came down to. At least in their eyes.

“Michaela, love.”

Bea’s words were as gentle as ever given the depths of her concern for the teenager. Her eyes caught the end of Michaela’s racing journal as it perched on the edge of her desk. Battered from her obsessive writings, Bea picked it up carefully to place it down carefully.

As she turned back to her niece, Michaela’s tired eyes stared up at her, hands still gripped at the wheel of her simulator with the screen paused in wait.

“It’s been ages since you got up.”

With a softness, her eyes conveyed the true weight behind her words. Michaela was more than aware her obsession with perfection worried her aunt, though she was unwilling to give it up. A relaxed sigh left her mouth as she rose from her chair, the simulator shutting down as Bea observed from her stance just across the room.

“Come eat, Travis has news.”

The casual words stunned Michaela more than she would be willing to relate. A knowing smile pulled at the corners of Bea’s mouth before she shrugged calmly.

“I’m not sure what it’s about, but he was quite insistent you come down.”

Those words were all it took before Michaela rushed down the stairs, her hair flying behind her in a messy haze of brown and blonde curls, bouncing against the gravity of her run.

“Mickey?”

Travis’ voice beamed with excitement as he caught the attention of his excited niece.

“We have a guest,” His head shook with a laugh. “Best behavior?” His pinky finger reached for Michaela’s own, an ill-fated attempt to calm her down before the unnamed guest presumably seated in their living room.

A clear of her throat and a twist of their pinkies and Travis led her to the living room.

A full head of dark hair turned to face the overzealous 15-year-old clothed in a raggedy Lightning McQueen t-shirt. With a laugh, he stood to attention, and a hand reached out to shake hers.

“René Rosin,” She exhaled with a breathiness that conveyed her amazement. A smile graced his features at her recognition, sure his decision had been reassured in that moment.

“I heard the Brits left you without a seat for next year.”

“Can you imagine?” She muttered, her smile never faltered despite her uncle’s clearance of his throat as a reminder of her ‘best behavior’ promise from just moments before.

“Sorry, I’m really—”

She cut herself off as René raised a hand to signal he graced the comment.

“When I found out, I can admit I was shocked beyond belief.”

The team principal’s Italian accent bled beautifully into his words. Michaela almost found herself distracted by the flourishes he added to the end of his sentences as she hung on to every word he expressed to her.

“How has your break been?”

Caught off guard by the question, Michaela shrugged her shoulders. With a nervous bite of her lip—terrified and in awe of the principal’s appearance in her living room—she chose her words wisely.

“Unfulfilling. I miss the track.”

With a nod of his head, René exchanged a knowing glance with Travis who gently chuckled at his niece’s criticalness.

Michaela’s mind spun at a mile a minute, an infinite number of scenarios of René’s next words ran through her consciousness. Hope was tussled with paranoia at the back of her mind. Hoping that this would be her moment of redemption but paranoid she would be put in her place once more.

They got someone to convince me to give up.

The thought displaced her for a moment before she snapped back into reality. Her teeth chewed at the inside of her mouth and her fingers pressed into her palms. Both were nervous habits that didn’t escape Travis and Bea’s attention though they exchanged subtle smiles that completely escaped Michaela. With a gentle tap on her shoulder, Travis coaxed Michaela to stop her movement. The action reminded her to exist in the moment before her.

“How soon would you like to be back? Racing?”

Michaela didn’t need the clarification he offered before she burst with attention.

“Tomorrow—today—I… I don’t care when. Just as soon as possible.”

René chuckled again at her eagerness. With a clap of his hands that startled Michaela as much as it excited her, René cleared his throat.

“Then tomorrow, I’ll see you in Veneto.”

Michaela tilted her head in confusion, feeling as if she had missed a few words before the statement.

“Sorry,” She stammered, paranoia crept back into her. “What—what do you mean? V-Veneto?”

His smile did little to calm her until his response accomplished the mission instead.

“How would you like to race for Prema in GP2?”

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