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#no one loves me
walrustrain · 2 years
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Do you ever feel like you’re just convenient?
You’re the convenient friend, convenient time pass, convenient relationship, convenient option for everyone.
You’re the person people hang out with because you’re easy, and always eager because you’re always just so desperate to feel wanted and not alone, but really you’re just convenient.
You know you’re not special, and that your spot in their life will be easily replaced and that they’d much rather someone else in their company- but again you’re just convenient. You’re the convenient option. The always available option.
I’m the friend who has best friends but isn’t the best friend. I’m the convenient friend. I’m the lover who falls in love but never the one being loved. I’m just the convenient route.
Im the ‘never says no’ friend. The ‘easy to take advantage of’ friend. The ‘can you do me a favour?’ friend. I’m the ‘useful until no longer of use’ friend. I’m the ‘I want to do something but everyone else is busy’ friend.
I’m the butt of the joke friend. I’m the punching bag friend. The forgotten friend. The one who’s feelings aren’t considered because I’m the ‘she’ll get over it’ friend.
I’m just the easy and convenient friend.
And that’s my own fault, thinking always being available, always being easy and giving more of myself will finally one day deem me worthy in someone’s eyes. Spoiler alert - it doesn’t. I’m still never enough.
I’m the ‘smile through the pain’ friend because being this friend hurts.
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biharanbitch · 15 days
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Do u want to play a little game?
*she asked* *he nodded with a smile*
I'll tell u something about my past and u respond with the words "run" or "stay"
*his eyebrows got tensed* *he nodded still*
Off she went to tell him about her past
RUN
Off she went to tell him about how she felt ugly inside
RUN
She told him how she knew that she is unlovable, so she masks her true identity by being nice and kind
RUN RUN RUN
*she is me * *him is every person she ever met*
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amistillhere · 9 months
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i am the loneliest person on the planet
it’s when your friends grow distant from you. and you make excuses for them because they never explained themselves. “they’re busy with school” “their family has a lot going on” you respect their privacy. you don’t want to annoy them. until you see their online posts. all of them together. meeting up in a restaurant. a reunion. everyone who seemed so busy has no problem leaving you out. not even asking if you were free. not missing your presence. and you wonder why. why was i left out with no answer? why do i get left behind? why does no one talk to me anymore? what did i do? what did i do? what did i do? what did i do? i have no friends. i’m no one’s first choice. i’m not even a last choice. i’m not even here. does anyone think of me? not about what i can do for them. but about how i’m doing? when will i meet people who think of me? who include me in anything? am i destined to be alone? why am i the worst person in the world? why won’t anybody tell me what i’m doing wrong? nobody’s here.
- amistillhere
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hopelessnihilist · 9 months
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Fun fact, I'm completely unlovable. I'm gonna fucking cry.
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Knowing that your replaceable is the worst feeling. It proves that you were never needed, nor wanted, and that your absence wouldn't be a burden to anyone. That you aren't one of a kind. In fact, there are multiple different versions of you that are far better. You didn't leave a trace on anyone, and all that remains of your existence is a blur in a memory because you were only temporary for them. That even if someone cared, they would move on in a week, month, or year? All your efforts and attempts were wasted, no matter what you do, they still move on to someone better and leave you behind yet again. They never truly appreciated you to the amount that you did them, and mourning the loss of you would be pointless when you never really mattered to them in the first place.
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ivynotpoisonous · 6 months
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club for girlies that are inherently unlikeable but they don't know why
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sp00kysk3lly · 3 months
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I just wanted love. That’s all. I’ve never asked for material things.
I’ve never wanted to win the lottery, I’ve never wanted to be famous, I’ve never asked for anything apart from to be loved.
But when your own friends barely speak to you, distance themselves from you, or just plainly ignore you.
And when the people who you thought loved you because they told you it, they flirted with you, and spoke to you every day for months leave you.
That’s when you start to realise that you don’t deserve love. You’re not allowed to love or be loved.
I will undoubtedly be on my own forever. No one wants me. No one wants to deal with chronic conditions or my severe mental health. They just want to use me, for company, maybe? For their own cruel purposes?
I don’t know why these people have come into my life to make me feel this way. But they did, and it’s proven to me so much.
I just wanted to love and be loved…
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kritagyakm · 3 months
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My first Ball Point pen Sketch♥️💀
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notdelusionalatall · 3 months
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It's even more painful listening to their excuses, like honey, I get it. You have your priorities, it's fine.
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I don't mean anything to anyone. :)
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liesmultixxx · 14 days
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finally deleted my (ex?) crushes number 😀 as someone who is profusely bad at letting go & moving on, this seems like a big step
i don’t even believe in love anymore lol so it’s fine i guess
for other people? sure, definitely!
for me? nope, no one’s gonna love me (romantically)
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depressed-boba · 26 days
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life update: still alive, still wishing i wasn't
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walrustrain · 2 years
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I just want to be enough
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heartlessdevil97 · 2 years
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Sometimes I'm very close to saying "goodbye" forever...
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I just want to be wanted. To be chosen. To be loved. To be given a goddamn chance.
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hopelessnihilist · 9 months
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I want to die. I'm a horrible, horrible person. Someone fucking kill me. Please. Do it. I might as well jump off a fucking building. I don't make anyone's lives easier. Or happier.
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myheartswildrumpus · 9 months
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My heart.
I don’t know, if there’s any point to it anymore.
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