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3 nights in a row right before bed I just wanna cry … 🧐 an idk why

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I haven’t worn hats in a while.

I smile less in photos.

I no longer (for the most part) smirk as if I am imaging something sexual.

I’m not looking to fill an emptiness.

I’m still funny

I’m partnered

I have a puppy

Still freezing in the Windy City

Found a job that makes me happy.


Had a rough year

Came out stronger


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And then there’s (. I should get more water to talk about her. She’s so beautiful and was the closest I’ve come to meeting another Black/Brown woman/WOC since I’ve been back. (I knew Г already and I don’t know if we’ll actually become friends.) Her skin is near brown, though maybe just in summer, and she has a kind of purple ombre that she seems to be growing out. I like her style as well, from last night and photos on Facebook. She rolled me a cigarette and lit it with her purple lighter. It’s one of those older looking metal ones that snapback. While I was talking to ^ and relighting my cigarette, again I said the lighter was beautiful and he agreed. I said she was also beautiful - which is the gayest I’ve been around him, and since I’ve been here this go ‘round. Angry at ^^ Tindering doesn’t count bc I wasn’t serious. But I was very serious when I asked her if she only dated men right after she mentioned breaking up with her boyfriend. I told her I wanted to hear her sing. This is how we got to Facebook. Apparently she used to sing at Cafe Mitanni, which is where I loitered with § and ¥

I want to do gay things with (. I couldn’t for the life of me imagine how her name was spelled. I really like it bc it also sounds really Black. She seems hella queer to me and even from the two photos I sent + she said she looks like a “2 beer queer.” I don’t know what kind of queer I am. I just know when I see an intriguing woman of color I start to feel very gay - the same with the woman from <4$. I think she walked away from me because she thought I was drunk by then. Upon review - a “3 beer queer” as it were bc I didn’t say anything to her when we were alone in the bathroom. I also tried to contain myself when I first saw ( too. I felt like if I didn’t I’d be aggressively interested/too much. And I was right bc she said she only dates guys. But the summer is hot and long and we shall see. I really want to kiss her.


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Atari Fuzz and Tube Screamer: Ibanez TS9DX and Loe Sounds Atari Fuzz Harmonic Percolator

My good friend Eddie Rifkind did a spectacular demo with our Atari Fuzz Percolator. Thanks, Eddie! Three more have just gone live over at

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