Appearance double standards
I (24f) have always cared about what I look like, just because I feel like it sends a message. I’m just now getting to a place where I actually know what I want to wear/understand my personal sense of style. I’m also becoming aware of the time I spend on my appearance, and wanting to cut down on it: I recently stopped wearing makeup and shaving my legs, and got my hair cut in a bob. My goal is to try to feel ok in my own skin.
I like seeing my natural face. I like leaving the hair/skin on my legs alone. It feels nice to live in the body I have without compulsively modifying it with makeup etc every day like I used to.
But lately I’ve been keenly aware of the implicit bias people carry against women who don’t go out of their way to present femininity in the usual way. The double standard between men and women drives me insane: if a guy has bushy eyebrows and his pants don’t exactly match his shirt, he’s just some guy; but if you see a woman with bushy eyebrows with clothes that don’t match, the first impression you get of her is “frumpy.” Because you can see beautiful, curated women in every direction (and if that’s you, please understand I admire and respect you to no end, you are rocking it).
I know that I’m still taking good care of myself, but I also know that I don’t really look like I am without makeup etc. and I’m worried it will affect my personal life as well as my career. I can’t tell if I’m just assuming other people will make assumptions about me, or if it’s reasonable to assume they actually will. Also important to note, I live in an area where appearance is… Kind of unusually important to people. Lots of plastic surgery etc in the area, so it’s hard not to be (hyper)aware.
I’ve been gravitating towards wearing more androgynous clothes, but I’m not sure if that’s the answer. Anyone else ever feel this way? Anyone have any tips for dealing with it?
Submitted February 25, 2020 at 03:50PM by officialkart
via reddit https://ift.tt/2HYQgm9