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#s: vine
harveywritings92 · 1 year
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[Ghost finds R/n’s mytube channel which he didn’t know about, called R/n’s Kitchen. He clicks on the most recent vid.]
R/n: Welcome to R/n’s kitchen, today we’re gonna be making potato gnoc-
[the pot behind her bursts into flames.]
König, whose the cameraman: Oh…
R/n: *not looking* Is it on fire? *the camera nods* Call the fire department.
König: Ja.... 
R/n: We’re gonna be making potato gnocchi-
{Suddenly Ghost smells something burning, he finally notices the video is a live stream and hears the downstairs fire alarm go off…]
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godsofhumanity · 9 months
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[before the war]
Menelaus: I eat Cheerios because they’re heart-healthy, and my heart has been severely damaged.
Menelaus:
Menelaus: So Helen, if you’re out there—
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ap-kinda-lit · 3 months
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Bulma: So, Vegeta, do you ever wanna talk about your feelings?
Vegeta: No.
Yamcha: I do.
Bulma: I know, Yamcha.
Yamcha: I’m sad.
Bulma: I know.
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harveyb-wabbit92 · 9 months
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[Màiri pulls to the Burger King Drive thru window.]
The Clerk: Okay ma’am here’s your-
[Spiderpunk suddenly comes outta nowhere shouting “Thank-you” and snatches the bag from the startled clerks grasp before swinging away.]
Màiri, feigning shock: Whut the shite????
[The clerk sticks their head outside looking stunned.]
Màiri: Can I ‘ave anuther one?
Clerk:...um, Lemme ask my manager?
[That’s how Hobie and Màiri got two meals for one.]
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Gohan: Look, Piccolo! It's the good Kush!
Piccolo: It's the dollar store, how good can it be?
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Interviewer: Is there anything else you want to say to the people watching?
Fukuchi: My favourite colour is blood.
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Bruce: You lying, cheating piece of shit.
Vance: Oh yeah? You're an idiot who thinks they can get away with anything. Welcome to the real world!
Bruce: I’m leaving and I’m taking the kids with me!
Finney: I think we should stop playing monopoly now.
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memedievil · 2 years
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Sir Daniel: *falls through the ceiling and crashes into the floor*
Canny Tim, unphased: Hey, Captain Fortesque.
Sir Dan, also unphased: Hi, Tim.
Sir Dan: ...Well that hurt.
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incorrect-sonic · 2 years
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*If Scourge was allowed to babysit*
Scourge: Whoa hey! Don't run with that knife-
Scourge: -with the blade towards you. You wanna hold it away from you so you can slice and stab.
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Conversation
Wilbur: I spilled yoo-hoo in the time machine...
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beanpole-simp-bin · 2 years
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Fancy Pants, sleeping: *Cutie Pants dumps water over his face* Fancy Pants, tiredly pushing the bottle away: Hello...?
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harveywritings92 · 1 year
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[How the paralysis Demon! König torments the reader. ]
[König, sitting on R/n’s bed staring at her while she’s sleeping, he calmly reaches out and gently places his hand on her forehead.]
R/n’s dream, she’s freaking out: What do you want from me?!
[König sit at the edge of her bed smirking as he continues eating a Kit-Kat bar incorrectly...}
R/n, sobbing: Please just stop!?
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godsofhumanity · 3 months
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Tyr: Toss me my keys. *Christmas tree crashes next to Tyr* Tyr: I said my KEYS Thor: I thought you said Christmas tree! Tyr: Why the FUCK would i say Christmas tree?!
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ap-kinda-lit · 6 months
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Piccolo: What kind of spider is that?
Gohan: It's a Daddy Long Legs.
Goku: It's a good looking spider, but I don't know if it's 'daddy'.
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harveyb-wabbit92 · 1 year
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Emmet, barges into Ingo’s room screaming: WAKE UP SLEEPY HEAD!!
Ingo, startled awake: Em..wh-the??
I-S/o, who was sleeping naked under the covers: *sits up* The fuck man...
{Emmet stares at her in shock as Ingo quickly tries to cover her.]
Emmet, laughing in disbelief: Holy crap, no way! *runs out of the room.*
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totallynottinsel · 7 months
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I was bored and made this at like 1 am with no reason behind it
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