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#season 2 = hottest season for everyone
o-wild-west-wind · 6 months
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i need one of those sexy firefighter calendars but it’s just the crew in those stolen uniforms does anyone else see my vision here
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torchiiko · 1 year
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its warm out today and my room always gets the hottest so u can imagine how annoyed i am . i cant express how infuriated ill be if i have to lose my privacy to the frickin heat again i might just kill someone
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ziorite · 7 days
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911 season 2 episode 4 really saw the brewing tension between buck and eddie and said “all in.” with an absolutely devious gleam in the eye
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exhibit a: your honor, that’s flirting. that’s fucking flirting.
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have some self respect please buck the pole is not a prop for you to drape yourself over like a victorian woman on a fainting couch while u flirt with ur new bro by being really sweet and nice to his kid
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maddie, firmly shoving aside everyone else to install herself at the top of my favorite characters list, giving a voice to us all 🫡
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and this is eddie looking like he’s about to jump buck for introducing him to a baby sitter. hottest thing a man can do. (also i love carla so much her energy is immaculate and she simply radiates warmth)
in conclusion, the tension between these two is absolutely boiling and i need them to kiss nasty about it :))
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19burstraat · 5 months
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ketterdam dashboard simulator
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goedmedbridge420
who up boeking they canal
10,345 notes
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drydens follow
I can't believe some of you log on here and thirstpost about barrel vagrants. it makes me so sick. these men are the very pits of society and have never honoured ghezen a day in their lives. there are so many other young men who make their living in a reverent way. have some dignity.
#ghezen #inghezenssight #ghezenhonouring #churchofghezen #handofghezen
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kooperomno1fan
lionsroar12 follow
omg HOW is kaz brekker winning this he's SO problematic he's not even good for the economy he killed members of his own gang and kidnapped councilman van eck's son
dregsundrained
cranky coz your gang fell apart aren't you
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oskervoexchange follow
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guys is this a mandela effect or what bc I SWEAR this painting used to be in the university district art museum, I literally saw it this week??? but I went today and it was GONE?????? there wasn't even a plaque?? guys pls I'm so confused why is everyone acting like this is normal for ketterdam? do priceless antiques just VANISH? am I being gaslit?
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stadhall-clerking
guys I'm so sorry I've been MIA :( I found out that my landlord was using my rent on the staves rather than fixing my black mould problem so I pushed him out the window and told the stadwatch he must have fallen and died because he wasn't honouring ghezen and got away with it. anyway I think maybe the black mould explains the dirtyhands/sturmhond fic I was writing sorry :( but I WILL finish my fairy queen of istamere meta post once I've moved into my new lodging
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dregsconfessions follow
SUBMISSION: sometimes I lie awake thinking about the time I fell down an entire flight of stairs at the slat when kaz was at the bottom, and he just stared at me (still lying on the floor), and then asked if I'd changed the beer kegs at the silver six yet. GIRL NO?!?!?!
#submission #dregs #dirtyhands #admin comment: laughed so loud my upstairs neighbour threatened to shoot me
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dregsconfessions follow
ADMIN NOTE: if the razorgulls don't fucking stop sending anon hate to this blog we'll tell dirtyhands n he'll send you your own IP address back
#see what happens you hack job seagulls
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kerchtourismboard
it's us, the real kerch tourism board, here to tell you what we're putting in the new summer season pamphlet. we got 1) three pages all about kaz brekker that end up being more of an advertisement than a deterrent 2) list of slipperiest spots in the barrel where you will fall over and get a concussion when ur drunk 3) top 10 ways to get your wallet stolen by a child in broad daylight 4) paintings of the komedie brute 5) advert for sten's stockpot 6) map of public toilets
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kerchtourismboardreal follow
we are not affiliated with any degenerate impersonator accounts who claim to be us. we are the only real kerch tourism account.
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kerchtourismboard-real follow
grafcanal smells like piss and you should bite everyone you see wearing the mister crimson costume
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stensstockpot follow
it's all 'fuck sten's stockpot' and 'I got food poisoning from the special at sten's stockpot' until you realise you don't have the money for cilla's fry, and then you come CRAWLING back to the loving arms of sten's stockpot and our special. you fucking traitors. you'll be back! you'll all be back
canaljumpings follow
what's in the special sten's stockpot
stensstockpot follow
it's a surprise ;)
bertskerch follow
nah I thought this was the real stens lmao
stensstockpot follow
bert smit you still have 45 kruge to pay on your tab and if you don't cough up we'll send our debtors to break your legs
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exchangingbabey follow
my grisha girlfriend who still wears a kefta and says things like 'nikolai lantsov is a bastard': ugh they're still debating whether or not the council of tides should be able to control kerch shipping, I hate inter-country politics
me: I think I hauve the queen's lady
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(insp) (insp)
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eclairsnme · 9 months
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♡ POV: Being The Itoshi Brother’s Elder Sister ♡
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3
The troubles of an Idol.
tags: idol!you, crack comedy, reunion, familial love, sfw, somewhat of a brat (⁎⁍̴̛ᴗ⁍̴̛⁎)
notes: she's back with more demands and silliness!! ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・'(*゚▽゚*)'・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
“Could you make that,” pointing to your chest subtly, “a little bigger?”
Sitting beside the photo editor, you closely observe her working magic on your recent photoshoot with a swimwear brand.
You thought the photos looked great until you caught on to an important missing element.
Boobs.
Big boobs to be specific.
You had boobs but they were not like Hana Haruna’s (*a Japanese pornstar*).
What is the point of posing for a swimwear brand when you lack the assets?
“Maybe if you could just accentuate it a little more,” you gestured your hands to reiterate your idea of a big boob.
“Miss, if I make it any bigger here it’ll look as if you have watermelon jugs as big as your head.”
Your photo editor had a point; your edited chest resembled overblown balloons.
But still! (╯•﹏•╰)
“Isn’t that what the people like? Do you know what they always say? ‘Big boobs don’t lie’.”
“I think you got the wrong idea here, miss.”
“We cannot let the people out there catch me lacking!”
This was your first ever swimwear photoshoot in your entire career. Usually, you will pose for makeup brands and luxury clothing brands.
Swimwear was an uncharted territory. Of course, you were a little overzealous.
Me! The idol who is perfect in every way! Perfect face, perfect figure, and perfect life — an idol who everyone knows and loves.
“Hold on a second, let me refer to my advisor for their advice.”
Imitating a handheld phone with your hands and fingers, you held it towards your ear and spoke through the mock phone.
“Hello, myself. Do you think big boobs are better or small boobs?”
You halted for a second before replying to your own quandary, “Most definitely big boobs.”
With that, you ended the “call”.
“There you have it, miss photo editor. You just have to make it big enough to look natural.”
“If you say so...”
“I am the perfect idol. I cannot lack!”
Maintaining the image of an idol sure is a tough job.
“Did she gain some weight?”
“She looked like she had some plastic surgery done to her nose.”
“Oh, I heard she’s dating that one foreign guy!”
“Didn’t you hear how she seduced her way into…”
“She looks like she aged like rotten cheese since her teenage years.”
“Don’t you think she’s the least talented of her siblings?”
Those were just some of the many comments you could ascertain from your dear haters coming from the live audience seat.
You know you are the epitome of perfection. No matter what they say, it would not make you hot under the collar.
Jealously sure is a terrible disease. ┐(´~`)┌
Currently, you are on a TV show with your male costar, whom you could not really remember his name for he is just a mere NPC.
Today’s show required you to promote a romance drama you acted in last year that has finally been broadcasted this year.
You played the role of the female lead, who fell in love with the male lead at first sight.
It turns out, the group of people who were talking behind your back was this NPC costar’s groupies.
Tsk. Bunch of buzzing bees.
They were on a nonstop mission to pour vitriolic attacks on you.
Despite all the hate, you thought it was quite flattering that they were giving you such undivided attention albeit having their “idol” — NPC costar — right beside you.
Yet again, you have proved to yourself that you are indeed the star of the show! Haters are part of the package of being so irresistible!
(Ŏ艸Ŏ)
You giggled at that.
“This is the hottest romance drama of this season that is sure to get you excited!” The host bellowed, prompting a wave of applause from the audience.
You smiled at the reception.
The interview was filled with scripted questions which you accordingly answered to.
Too easy.
You just had to smile sweetly at everyone to have them fall in love with you. Even the bunch of groupies could not help but to fall for your charm.
Everything was going swimmingly until the host pulled out his wild card — an unscripted question directed at you.
“As a famous idol, do you have any real-life romantic experiences that are swoon-worthy to share with the audience?” The host said in an overly enthusiastic tone.
The audience gasps.
All the cameras were then angled at you anticipating your response.
You smiled sweetly at the host.
Does this guy hate me or something? He must be my number one hater!
Your privacy has always been prioritised as an idol.
Not much was known about your private life until the recent news of your relationship with the Itoshi siblings broke out.
Disregarding that, the matter of your romantic relationship was a topic deemed taboo even to your fans.
The genesis of the taboo nature of your private romantic life started from an honest discussion among the netizens.
They were speculating who you were romantically involved with but it was all for naught as they could not find even a speck of man involved with you.
Even when feverish stalkers took matters into their own hands, they still could not find dirt on you.
Male costars? You treated them like dirt off-camera.
Other male celebrities? You did not even bother looking in their direction or bear to breathe the same air as them for you are better than them.
It soon became apparent to them that perhaps you had a secret affair or were involved in something incredibly scandalous — maybe you were interested in unique deviances?
Their theories then became out of control and so out of pocket that everyone began making up weird conclusions of their own online, which caused a huge uproar.
In the end, everyone decided to be more hush about that topic.
In reality, the truth as to why no one was able to dig up any evidence of you in a relationship was simply because you have always been single as a pringle.
How could a young eligible, gorgeous and talented bachelorette be so single? ( ▀ 益 ▀ )
That is because your brain only contains idol-related information. Everything else? Nil.
Is this man mocking me?
“Surely someone as pretty as you would have countless opportunities for love isn’t it?” The host continued with his onslaught of probing.
Should I strangle him? Or should I just slap him? No no no. Evil monologue shut up.
You look over to your manager and gave him the death glare.
In response to that, he expeditiously told the producers to temporarily halt the program.
With hands akimbo, your tall and slim frame overwhelmed the short and stubby manager.
You frowned at him and harshly whispered to his ears, “Get me a boyfriend ASAP!”
“Eh?!”
The program ended and you finally let out a long sigh in the car.
“So did you find me a boyfriend yet?”
“I-I don’t think that is how relationships work! I cannot just magically bring you a boyfriend.”
“But I want a boyfriend! So find me one!” You exclaimed helplessly.
Your manager sighed at your zero concepts of relationships and love.
“Have you loved someone before?”
“Myself.”
“Other than yourself?”
“Is this a trick question or something?”
Mr Manager glances at the rearview mirror with a defeated expression.
“Have you experienced love before?”
“What’s that?” You asked, fingers on your chin unsure what the heck that meant. ಠ╭╮ಠ
“The butterflies in your stomach when you meet someone you love!” He exasperated.
“Oh, that! Whenever I catch glimpses of myself in the mirror, I get this inexplicable feeling of that thing you described!”
This was a lost cause. Although you acted in numerous romance dramas, you still did not grasp the meaning of love. What a hypocrisy it is.
“To have a boyfriend, you must first love that person!”
“What? That sounds like a hassle. I just want a boyfriend.”
Mr manager scrunched his nose in disbelief.
“And why do you exactly want a ‘boyfriend’? This can’t be another of your impulsive thoughts is it?”
Mr manager had a déjà vu of a time when you ordered him to get you a pet tiger.
“No, it is not! What with all these questions, Mr interrogator?”
“…”
“Shut up and just get me a boyfriend.”
“So I have the right to set you up on a date?”
“Whatever it is, I want a boyfriend. I am being very extremely superbly serious!” You said with finality.
Mr Manager could only sigh in defeat yet again for the umpteenth time.
“But you are a public figure–”
You snapped at Mr Manager, “Shut up!”
He continued driving the car, looking at you through the rear-view mirror.
Any man would die to date you; you were a beguiling and dazzling lady. However, your attitude was something he was not sure any man would be able to handle.
In his entire career of being your manager, not once has he had a good day. Every day was filled with problems caused by you that he had to solve.
His brow scrunched together in grim defeat.
Boyfriend huh? Good luck to that unlucky guy.
You, on the other hand, seating cross-legged in the backseat, were marinating in annoyance.
After experiencing the mockery of the host deprecating your love life, you could not let that slide.
You had to ratio him.
Was it immature? Debatable.
Your only participation in this so-called romantic relationship concept was acting in dramas and movies.
And your exposure to the male species was…
Ehem.
Despite being an idol, your otherwise desolate personal life painted you as a lone wolf.
In your life, it was all work and dedication to being the best.
You were on fire! On fire to get a boyfriend! You will show them that you are capable of anything, and not lacking in any department!
The constant buzz of your phone eventually broke you out of your daze.
When you saw the screen, you immediately picked up the call.
“Rin!”
“I’m one step closer to demolishing brother.”
Eh? !(◎_◎;)
You took the phone away from your ear and stared into the screen making sure you have the right person on the phone.
After confirming it’s the right person, you responded, “What do you mean demolishing your brother?”
“I’ve joined Paris X Gen in Blue Lock to become the best striker and to destroy brother.”
“Mmm… you are destroying my heart, Rin. Why are you still talking about your brother like this?”
“I will be better and he will finally acknowledge me.”
You murmured incoherent thoughts with a frown.
This pent-up hatred can go no further!
“Sister?”
“Where are you now?”
“In the Blue Lock facility. Why?”
You hung up the phone.
“Drive me to this Blue Lock facility place,” you ordered Mr Manager.
As soon as you arrive at the Blue Lock building, you were met with strict security.
“Let me in you low-life man.”
“Miss, this is not a place you can just walk in.”
“And a measly man like you can?”
You had been at this for a good 10 minutes, going back and forth with the stubby man and his group of security guards.
Getting sick and tired of this nonsense, you slap the man's fake wig off his head. The wig which was so fake you could see your reflection on it, flew away dramatically and plopped onto the hard asphalt ground.
“M-my hair!” He ran straight to the plastic wig.
“What’s with all these ruckus?”
The hairless man exclaimed at the sight of the short-haired woman.
Your attention went towards the petite, short-haired woman. She looked about your age. As she moved closer to you, almost immediately, your attention snapped to her big bust.
Those are what I call knockers! OMG! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Too busy ogling at her melons, you didn’t realise she was calling out for you.
Snapping yourself out of it, you introduced yourself.
“You are the popular idol!” The busty lady interrupted you, “I am, Anri Teieri, the manager of this facility. This is a strictly out-of-bounds area. What business does an idol like you have here?”
“Miss Anri, you see I have an underaged brother here and I, as his attending guardian, need to see him.”
“I’m sorry, but only authorised personnel can enter the premises.”
“Then authorise me. My little brother is feeling so homesick he was practically begging on his knees to meet me.”
“Every participant here is dedicated to being the best striker, we cannot afford any distractions such as yourself. I’m sure your little brother understands this — it’s all part of the process,” Anri puffed her chest out.
Seeing the physics of her melons do their job, you unconsciously covered your own chest.
That’s unfair! _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):
Anri observed the female opposite her. Hands down, you are the most beautiful woman she had ever laid eyes on. A face sculpted by the gods and paired with those glassy teal eyes that just compelled attraction. Of course, she knew who you are — who doesn’t.
Honestly, Anri was a huge fan of your work. She had collected all your albums and watched all your shows.
You could say that she’s a fan girl.
She also knew that you were the older sister of Rin Itoshi. She had looked through each player's records and with the recent breakout news that you are related to the Itoshi siblings, no doubt you are his sister.
However, she cannot haphazardly let you enter.
What goes on inside Blue Lock is confidential.
“Who is in charge of this building? Call him out now,” you demanded, unwilling to leave until you got what you want.
As if the big man up there had heard your quandary, Anri’s phone rang and it was Ego.
“Let her in,” the deep voice reverberated in her ear.
Ego stared at the monitor, observing Anri and the idol through the surveillance camera.
“But,” Anri tried to protest to no avail as Ego quickly intercepted.
“No harm letting her in.”
With that, the call ended, leaving a befuddled Anri.
“The general manager called and said you are allowed in,” Anri hesitantly said.
“That wasn’t too hard isn’t it?” You smiled, satisfied.
EHE god is always on my side. ✌︎('ω')✌︎
The Blue Lock facility was a massive site. It was bigger than any skyscraper you had ever seen. This could easily be the most impressive building in Japan.
The space was so big that every step you took became a loud echo.
“Hey, big melon woman,” you called out for her.
“P-pardon m-m-me?” Anri is flustered at your bluntness.
“Yes, you.” You replied, disregarding her blushing face, “Where’s Rin?”
“The Blue Lock players are currently undergoing their training as of now, therefore I’ll be bringing you to the surveillance room where Ego is at.”
“And should I know what this Ego thing is?”
“Ego is a man I chose to oversee this Blue Lock project.”
“Oho — so you are the mastermind? That’s pretty impressive.”
That was impressive. You had an inkling an old, wrinkly man was behind Blue Lock but to think it was the big melon woman? That was impressive in your books.
Well, that and coupled with your bias for big boobs. (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾
Leading you through the vast hallway, both of you finally arrived at your destination.
Anri knocked on the door a couple of times.
“Come in,” came a reply.
As soon as the door opened, you were welcomed by the bright screens of many monitors.
Looking at the screens, they were all surveilling all of the Blue Lock players in the facility.
“Ego, this is the idol you told me to bring along.”
“Here, what you are witnessing are all the unpolished diamonds striving to become the best striker the world will soon witness,” Ego stood up, overwhelming your frame even though you weren’t short by any means.
Ego was a tall, lanky man and you cannot help but compare him to the game character called “Slenderman”.
“Make no mistake that we are the next revolution of football,” continued Ego.
You took a step towards the monitors and scrutinised trying to locate Rin.
“Note this, every day, every boy here only thinks about eating, sleeping and football,” continued Ego.
Still unable to find Rin, you pulled Anri and ask her to help you look for him. More pair of eyes will get the job done.
“We have never allowed any outsider to our facility and you are the first. Consider this a blessing that I am a fan of your works and have allowed you to witness this holy sanctuary,” continued Ego.
Where is Rin?!
“There he is!” Anri smiled as she pointed at a monitor to your far left.
Rin was on the field practising with other players.
“Bring me to him,” you interrupted Ego’s nonstop rant.
“I will, but I have a better idea,” he suspiciously said.
On the side of the field, Rin took off his football boots.
The nonstop practice and matches had worn out his boots till the original colour was gone.
It was not even a week since he had joined Paris X Gen, and the regiment was even harsher than before.
It was not for nothing though, he could feel his stamina, strength and ability getting better.
Nothing can stop him from achieving greater heights.
Be it the jerk Shidou or Isagi, he will be better.
But he cannot help to still feel that he is lacking somethi-
"RIN!"
The speaker rumbled throughout the entire Blue Lock building.
The big screen flickered and you came to view.
Rin sank back and covered his face; covering the heavy blush that instantly painted his face bright red.
"Sister..." he muttered under his breath, "What are you doing here?"
Embarrassment was currently the biggest understatement as he tried to pretend he did not hear or see anything.
"Hey, isn't that the idol? Am I dreaming right now?" Karasu gasps at your appearance.
"Rin, can you hear me?" You waved your hand trying to get your little brother's attention.
The Ego man told you that you can communicate with Rin through the screen but what a big liar he was!
On the monitor, the figure of Rin showed that he was still minding his own business as if he did not know you are here.
"Your dearly beloved sister is here!" You shouted into the mic again thinking that perhaps it was some faulty audio.
Your voice echoed throughout the building again, everyone in the building had their attention on you.
Uproars could be heard from the players in every room exclaiming at the sight of a popular idol.
You continued calling out for brother. After all, Ego had nicely set up a Zoom call for you, you cannot let this opportunity go to waste.
Why isn't he looking at me? (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞
At the corner of the room, away from the screen, Ego held back his laughter and Anri silently stood unable to help you.
"Hey, Reo-" Nagi poked Reo, "isn't that the videogame character?"
"She's the person the videogame character was modelled after," Reo replied.
“She’s a real person?” Nagi said in disbelief.
Unlike Nagi, who only knew you from his game, Reo has actually went to your live concerts multiple times.
After all, your concerts were sponsored by Mikage Corporation.
“Even in real life, she look like a video game character.”
“Is it because she look so unreal?” Reo replied.
"Meine Leibe, you have come for me," Kaiser stopped his track as soon as he heard your voice.
Pushing Isagi out of his way, he walked towards the screen with both arms out.
“This must be fate.”
☆〜(ゝ。∂)the end (for now) ☆〜(ゝ。∂)
Part 4
<ehe did you feel that second-hand embarrassment? (I hope you did)>
<why does she keep bothering Rin? It’s because she still sees him as the small baby he used to be and can't stop being the protective (overbearing) sister - she doesn’t know that yet cuzzzz she’s dense>
<if you have any suggestions or whomever you think she should be paired with, don't be shy to share your thoughts!>
<Thankiew for reading!!!>
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myysaints · 1 year
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°˖ ⊹ ꒰ CL16 ꒱ TEAM COLOURS ─ CHARLES LECLERC
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CHARLES LECLERC x f!actress!reader
⌗︙・ summary — with one simple instagram story, you blew up the internet. now everyone is eager to know if the rumours are true: is Charles Leclerc really seeing Hollywood's hottest it girl?
genre — social media au, fc irene from red velvet
notes — charles didn't get pole but he did get podium!!!! so here's a gift for all us tifosi's 🥂 also - i'm of east asian ethnicity myself hence why the past 2 smau's have had EA face claims asdfhg but regardless im totally open to doing smau requests for other ethnicities!!! my inbox is open after all haha. anyways i hope u enjoy this one! apologies in advance for the google translated french LOL
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yourusername added to their story.  32m
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[caption: here’s to the weekend 🍾]
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yourusername
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Liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc, florencepugh, and 3,457,216 others
🏷   scuderiaferrari
yourusername   screw cowgirls, i’m a car girl 🏎 🏁
view all 38,009 comments
scuderiaferrari   We think you look good in red ❤️
charles_leclerc   I agree yourusername   why thank you charles charles_leclerc  Of course, ma chérie y/nfanpage1   YOOOO WHAT THE-
danielricciardo   Great fun karting with ya on Thurs. You’re not bad – for a rookie 😉
yourusername   oh hush you dannyricdannieric   iconic new wag alert?????
landonorris   as the kids say, slay ✨
yourusername   i see i’ve taught you well 😌 landonorris   Haha, learnt from the best! y/nl/nsleftpinkie   GIRLYS PULLING THE WHOLE GRIDDDDDD purpleporschegirl   FR like i’ve never seen them this active 💀💀💀
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f1wagupdates
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Liked by 34,082 others
f1wagupdates   HOT OFF THE PRESS FROM f1anons ON TWITTER 🖤 After a tumultuous start to the season and a breakup from long-term partner Charlotte Sine six months ago, it seems that Charles Leclerc has found love again! The Ferrari driver was seen roaming Melbourne in the days leading up to the Australian GP, and fans have spotted him cozying up to an unknown woman. Neither Leclerc nor Scuderia Ferrari have commented on the situation.
view all 1,002 comments
jamiesgridthots   literally where in the og tweet did it say it was abt charles….
keepittoyaself   Anon straight up said “Sine-ing” off. Who else could it be about? maybeimafool   okay, so here’s the real question: who’s the girl?????? ssumertimedadness   IDK, but she is sooooo lucky 😭
sculderiabullrari   So, we all agree that it’s Y/N L/N, right?
sainzpookiebookie   hate to be that person, but i don’t think they’ve even met each other irl... thegrreat63   ???? charles literally commented on her post about attending the AusGP ??? sennathesenate   Exactly. Why else would Ferrari give her a VIP paddock pass? Just because of one viral Tweet? tifosi55   yall r delusional LOL he literaly just broke up with charlotte theyre NOT DATING!
kimiiiboxbox   i know we’ve only seen them interact like once in a comments section, but i want charles and y/n to be real SO BAD
yourusername added to their story.                                                            24s
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[caption: new fave colours ❤️🖤❤️]
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yourusername added to their story.                                                                       32m
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[caption: monaco, here we come]
charles_leclerc added to their story.                                                                      41m
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[caption: Coming home. 🇲🇨 🇲🇨]
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f1wagupdates
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Liked by 28,239 others
f1wagupdates   SUBMITTED BY ANON 🖤 Amidst the rumours swirling about Oscar-nominated actress Y/N L/N being the next to join the wag crew, fans have spotted Charles Leclerc and an unknown woman spending a fun day at the beach in Monaco… 🏖☀️
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maxverstoppening   uh hello????? y/n l/n posting a story about going to monaco ….. charles posting about “coming home” 30 mins later ………. somethings afoot
tsutsumnodas   you’re not seriously suggesting,,,, that theyre,,, maxverstoppening   many thoughts being thunk !
gaslyyup   hollywood it girlie together with racing it boy? man, Monaco gp boutta be crazy fr
atoceanblvd   gonna take a bath with my toaster 🥰🥰
mlniemrtinez   the highway looks so comfy rn omg 😍 d3ftonesgirll   They better be real or I will actually hunt both of them down.
scuderiaferrari
📍Circuit de Monaco
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Liked by yourusername, f1, charles_leclerc, and 4,271,855 others
🏷   yourusername
scuderiaferrari   caught yourusername hard at work 💪💪💪
view all 305,627 comments
yourusername   doing my best for the best team 🫡
yourusername   hey charles_leclerc and carlossainz55 am i doing a good job?
carlossainz55   Absolutely 👍 ! charles_leclerc   Dunno about best, but you sure are the prettiest ;) yourusername   …..i don’t know if i should be offended or grateful charles_leclerc   ❤️😂 paddockfemcel   they know EXACTLY what theyre doing 😭😭
user1   y/n and charles in the comments playing with our feelings BOI IF YOU DONT TELL US THAT YOURE TOGETHER RN-
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc   Hard at work in Monaco. What a great race week. Finished P2. It’s good to be back.
view all 284,112 comments
carlossainz55   You do too much, cabrón 😂
Liked by charles_leclerc drdannyric   um???? what does carlos know that we don’t….
scuderiaferrari   And onwards we go! To P1 and beyond 🚀
yourusername   looking good, leclerc ;)
Liked by charles_leclerc
y/nl/nfanpage1   WHAT IS Y/N DOING HERE???
user2   no like….. seriously.... girl stand UP….. user3   I don’t get what she sees in him. He drives around in circles for a living 🙄 user4   Jeez why are yall so pressed 😭😭 they’re literally just friends… user5   !!!! that’s what im sayin!!!!! everybody’s so upset but they haven’t even confirmed if they’re dating or not LOLOLOL
charles_leclerc added to their story.                                                                              12h
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[caption: Bumped into someone familiar in Monaco today @/yourusername]
yourusername
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yourusername   quick pit stop to smell the flowers… 🌷☁️👒
Liked by charles_leclerc, lilymhe, pierregasly, and 2,948,227 others
view all 108,447 comments
landonorris   A true rose
yourusername   gosh you’re so cheesy landonorris   I was talking about me not you charles_leclerc   Hey, both of you play nice landonorris   stay out of it Leclerc
ana_d_armas   Stunning, Y/N!
Liked by yourusername Liked by charles_leclerc
charles_leclerc   💐🖊
yourusername   💌💌 clarleslaclarc   excuse me – what???? raikkkkonon   oh so they have inside jokes now… racketpiquet   Bro chill, it’s just a flower emoji, yall r doing too much 🤣🤣
babygotback   They are so UNSERIOUSSS first Y/N with flowers on Charles’s story now this??? 😭
jantalksalot   AND THAT LAST SLIDE. WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT IT!!!! mickymousemacher   atp i bet they’re just messing with us for the fun of it
f1wagupdates
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Liked by 621,443 others
f1wagupdates   It seems Charles Leclerc isn’t afraid of packing on the PDA – Here he is with an unknown woman at a local bazaar in Monaco! According to sources, the Ferrari driver is reportedly “very serious” about their relationship, and a source tells us that the two are “very happy” and “very much in love”.
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yourusername added to their story.                                                                               12m
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[caption: back in the city. feels good to be home!]
nyccelebgoss
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Liked by 91,273 others
nyccelebgoss   Formula 1’s hottest commodity, Charles Lecclerc, spotted Monday night outside an exclusive Soho bar. Doesn’t help that a certain Y/N L/N is also in the city… Could Leclerc’s elusive beau be the award winning actress? All we know is: Leclerc may be kissing – but he certainly isn’t telling 💋 Follow us for more NYC celebrity gossip 🤫
view all 1,663 comments
tsunogaslys   okay, as much as i wanna know whats going on, don’t they deserve a little privacy??
y/nluvrrrr   Was just thinking that. I hope they’re ok with all this media attention.
charlosscuderia   What the hell is charles doing in NYC?
mymuppetlando   Y/N made a story about being in NY. You can put 2 and 2 together lol. gridgirlfriend224   oh so he’s WHIPPED whipped 😭
warytonsennea   OK, now they HAVE to make some kind of statement.
y/nfanupdates   Yeah, there’s literally no way around this one LOL it’s def Y/N
charles_leclerc
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Liked by danielricciardo, carlossainz55, landonorris, and 7,218,942 others
🏷   yourusername
charles_leclerc   Well, I guess the cat’s out of the bag. So here I go: Mon amour, the past one year I have spent with you has simply been the best year I’ve ever had. Ma Cherie. You bring light to my life and a smile to my face each time I see you – Up on the silver screen, in the paddock cheering for me, or when I wake up next to you. Your love means more to me than you could ever know. Tu es ma vie et ma lumière. Merci d'être mienne. (You are my life and my light. Thank you for being mine.) I love you forever. ❤️
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yourusername   i love you so much mon amour. here’s to one year and counting ❤️
charles_leclerc   ❤️❤️��️
danielricciardo   FUCKING FINALLY!!!! congrats you two 🙌
Liked by charles_leclerc Liked by yourusername
landodelrey   ONE YEAR????? THEY’VE BEEN KEEPING THIS SECRET FOR ONE YEAR???
Liked by yourusername Liked by charles_leclerc tifosibabette16   i just KNOW that parasocial alex is smiling to himself somewhere 🤭
landonorris   S’about time. Oh, and you’re too good for him, Y/N ;) McLaren is waitingggggg
yourusername   sorry lando, but it's just like seb said: everyone is a ferrari fan (including me) charles_leclerc   😘 That’s my girl.
lewishamilton   ❤️
charles_leclerc   ❤️ yourusername   ❤️
scuderiaferrari   Welcome to the family yourusername!
Liked by yourusername
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© myysaints
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chungledown-bimothy · 5 months
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Top 5 nat 20s ? And top 5 Nat 1s?
so many choices, so few spots.
Nat 1s: (i'm not 100% about the order of 2 3 and 4 honestly)
1- the THREE nat 1s at the start of Starstruck. i'm not good at math but if i remember probability right that was like a 0.0125% chance. (0.05^3*100, right?). could not have started the season on a more fitting energy.
2- jaysohn and lila in burrow's end ep 5. the dice told their story, and it was an incredible one.
3- gorgug is maybe his own dad? one of my favorite bits, and the context of what everyone else was up to made it even better.
4- fabian's NINE nat 1s on leviathan. no good very bad day, indeed. THE PNEUMONIA CONDITION.
5- cody hard whiffing with the triple sword. you know the one. i'm famously a cody hater, so that was just so fucking funny.
Nat 20s-
1- Pinocchio's persuasion for the Baba Yaga. The speech he delivered was amazing, but what happened there, to me, was him holding up Pib and saying "Where the white women at?"
2- The Mas Vegas casino win. Mostly for the cast's reactions, honestly.
3- Lapin's insight into Keradin. It laid the groundwork for both getting incredibly important information and, of course, the single hottest thing to ever happen in the dome.
4- Andhera in the duel. A wrestling match? Against me? The slipperiest boy??
5- Fabian in the arcade. There were nat 20s before that in Fantasy High, but that was the first one that blew my goddamn mind, and for that, it will always have a very special place in my heart.
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If I Stay
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ft: michael kaiser x f!reader
summary: you don’t know how you got into this predicament, taking beating after beating, insult after insult, all for what? for your daughter, who your fiancée loves more than anything. you begin to think back on how you put yourself into this position
cw: aged!up, abusive relationship (not michael & reader), angst, physical and emotional abuse (not michael & reader), please do not read if this will trigger you (for your own safety and mental well being 🫶🏻)
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It’s always easy to say that we would never let a significant other treat us badly. It’s so easy to tell ourselves that we respect ourselves too much to allow someone to put us down.
When we’re on the outside, we see toxic relationships and always tell ourselves that we’ll never allow ourselves to be in one until we do become in one. How hard is it to leave when you don’t remember the reason why you originally left?
That’s what you keep asking yourself as you look at your fiancée of 5 years. Why do you stay? Why can’t you bring yourself to leave?
Is it love? Is it because you’re stuck? Is it because you want to make it work? You don’t have an answer to these questions. But when you look at your 2 year old daughter, you can’t help but wish she wouldn’t hear her father yelling at you, calling you every name that had ever existed. You prayed she wouldn’t see the bruises that covered your body, causing you to be forced to wear sweaters even during the hottest seasons because he doesn’t try to leave bruises in easily hidden places.
You prayed so hard every night that your daughter would never allow herself to be in a relationship as toxic as yours.
You shielded your daughter from seeing and hearing the fights that go on in the night. You shed silent tears in order to not wake her from her slumber as you cowered in the corner taking punch after punch.
Your fiancée was a narcissist in the worst way. Not only was everything your fault, you didn’t do anything, you paid for nothing, and you never took care of your daughter even though you were the primary caregiver, everything was in your name, you were the one who had a steady job while your fiancée was once again unable to work due to his “back injury” that he obtained while at work.
He really did though, in the beginning. He went to physical therapy and you were there for him every step of the way until it became months after he had finished his therapy and was cleared to go back to work. Instead, he used it as an excuse to not work, do chores, anything.
Your days include taking care of your daughter, going to work at one of your two jobs, going to your second job, coming home to clean, make dinner, and continue taking care of your daughter. All while your fiancée sat on the couch playing games.
While you were at work, your daughter stayed with your mother, who had been worried for your well being. You never told her what really happens at home, always playing it off as just another silly argument, saying he was going to anger management, and that things were getting better. Your mother knew better, though, but the only thing she could do was love and be there for you. She’s tried to help you; tried to get you to leave, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. You tell yourself time and time again that you love him and that’s the reason why you stay. You chose to relish in the good times rather than the bad, even when the bad outweighed the good.
That being said, you were looking forward to the weekend. Your darling baby girl had recently turned 3 and her birthday party was on Saturday. Your best friends, who you considered as family, were coming to spend time with your daughter.
They’ve always expressed their concerns about your fiancée to you, but they choose to love and support you no matter what.
Because you’re paying for everything out of pocket, you had reached out to take a rain check on the party because you didn’t have the money to be able to afford to take everyone swimming. One of your friends, Kathrin, offered to pay for it instead just so that your daughter could spend the day having fun with her cousins and aunts. You were so thankful and had talked to your fiancée about it, to which he agreed to it.
The day of the party, however, you were in the middle of getting your daughter ready for her party by dressing her in her favorite party dress, and your husband had passed by your daughter’s room after just waking up. Stopping, he turned back around and looked at you in anger, causing the hair on your arms and nape to stand. You instinctively turned around and shielded your daughter behind you as you stared at your fiancée, waiting for him to say something as he glowered down at you.
“Tell your little friend that she’s not paying for shit.” He finally speaks. “I don’t fucking accept handouts.”
You stared at him in disbelief.
“It’s not a handout. Kathrin genuinely wants Emma to have fun with her cousins and aunts.” You responded, careful to not raise your voice or change your calm tone. You didn’t want to start an argument but calmly talk it out. Sometimes he’d be in a good mood to talk things out and you were hoping, praying that today was one of those days.
“She’s not paying for anything.” He seethed. Looks like today wasn’t one of those days.
“All she’s trying to do is make me look bad. Tell her she’s not paying for shit.”
You scoffed before you glanced down at your daughter. Giving her a small smile, you tell her to go play with her toys so that she wouldn’t be in the same room as the impending argument that would shortly unfold before looking at your fiancée.
“She’s not making you look bad. Sometimes people need help and it’s ok to accept help. She just genuinely wants to make Emma happy.” You respond. When it came to your daughter’s well-being and happiness, you found your voice.
Your fiancée’s glare never wavered. He didn’t like when you talked back to him, especially when you were attempting to make him look like a fool.
“I know what your friends think about me. You think I’m fucking dumb?!” He shouted, causing you to flinch.
Wrong move.
He immediately reached out and grabbed you by your neck, lifting you up to where your feet barely touched the floor, dangling below. You grabbed onto his wrist, trying to get him to loosen his hold onto you until he threw you against the door causing you to choke in pain.
“I don’t give a fuck if your friends want to talk shit to me but the moment you open your mouth, you bet your stupid ass I’m going to shut you up myself.”
Squeezing his fingers around your throat, you feel your airwaves close and you begin to gasp for breath. Your body’s alarm bells ring and you begin to struggle and scratch at his hands and wrist, trying to loosen his grip on you.
In the corner of your tear filled eyes, you see your daughter in the hall as she sees her father choking you and begins to cry.
The one weakness your fiancée has is his daughter, so when he hears her cries, he immediately drops his guard and looks over at her. Dropping you to the floor, he runs over to her and scoops her up in his arms.
“It’s ok sweetheart, daddy’s got you now.” He soothes as he walks away, leaving you coughing on the floor trying to find your breath.
Damn him. Fucking damn him.
You reach for your phone and send a quick text to your friends that the party was cancelled. When they expressed their worries and asked what happened, you didn’t respond back.
As soon as you caught your breath, you go into the bathroom, turning on the light and looking into the mirror. Forming on your neck were bruises in the shape of your fiancée’s fingers, steadily growing darker as time passed by.
The tears that had formed in your eyes earlier fell and you felt yourself sink onto the floor. Covering your mouth with your hand, you finally let yourself cry.
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That night, you gently got out of bed and dressed yourself in clothes that would hide your arms and neck. After your fiancée had calmed down, he apologized for what he did to you and cried asking for your forgiveness, which as always, you forgave him.
After putting your daughter to bed, he came up behind you and began to kiss your neck, apologizing over and over while you cleaned the dishes from dinner.
This happens every time. He would have an outburst, hit you, and then beg your forgiveness when he felt horny. So you ended up forgiving and sleeping with him. Today wasn’t any different and you wanted nothing more than to take your daughter and leave.
But you couldn’t do that to him. He loved his daughter more than anything and despite how horrible he is to you, he’s an amazing and wonderful father. Emma is his entire world and she loves her father very much.
Your friends and family have told you that it wasn’t healthy for her to be raised in an environment where you were being abused. You knew it. But you just couldn’t take her away from him so long as he never laid a hand on her. And a part of you felt like he knew that.
Leaving to go to the convenience store, you thought back on when you were laying underneath your fiancée. He kept whining about how much he wanted another child, a sibling for Emma. You weren’t ready for another child just yet. Not with him at least. So while you took birth control to prevent another pregnancy that would result in you being stuck even more than you already were. Yet another reason that would make you feel the need to stay.
As you entered the convenience store, you bought a pregnancy test and water. You couldn’t bring yourself to take it at home, so you took it in the store restroom. Even with birth control, there was always the chance that you could become pregnant still and while you didn’t experience any symptoms with your daughter, you found yourself becoming nauseated as the days went on, so you were worried. You couldn’t let your fiancée find out because then you’d end up underneath him every night to make sure you would become pregnant. You were thankful that you kept your birth control a secret from him, feigning an illness when you received the implant so you would never be worried. Unfortunate for you that you were.
As you washed your hands in the sink, you thought back to 7 years ago.
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You walked along the halls of your high school after school while you waited for your brother, Alexis Ness, to finish practice. He asked for you to wait for him so that the two of you could go home together…after accompanying his friend Michael. You were supposed to stay near the field, but you got bored watching the guys kick a ball around. Or the one man who believed he was better than the rest, even your brother.
Not wanting to watch your brother subject himself to be treated like a dog, you snuck away during a play.
You love your brother, you absolutely do. He was just very protective of you. If anyone thought he was serious about Michael, it was worse with you. He wouldn’t hesitate to threaten any guy who came up to you, good intentions or bad. It made dating hard and you wanted to be able to experience your first boyfriend. Hell, you’d take a first date.
Passing by the classrooms lost in your thoughts, you felt a hand grab your arm and pull you backwards and into a hard body. Looking up behind you, you met the owner of the hand and body, who looked to be a couple of inches taller than your brother and he had an attractive smile.
Letting you go, he stepped back and rubbed the back of his neck while you turned around to face him, keeping silent. You didn’t know who he was but you guessed he had to find a workaround to talk to you since your brother scared away just about every guy in your grade.
“Sorry.” He apologized. “I saw you and didn’t know how else to get your attention without alerting your brother.”
You were right.
“It’s ok.” You responded, giving a smile. “My brother can be scary when he wants to be.”
He laughed and the sound of his laughter made your heart flutter.
“Yeah, he’s never said anything to me, but I’ve heard a lot of stories so I figured my best bet to talk to you was to wait until you were alone. N-Not that I was following you or anything, I was in the faculty office.”
Your smile widened.
“Uh huh. Sure.” You teased.
It felt nice talking to him. While your experience with talking to guys was limited to your brother, this conversation felt easy.
“I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime?” He asked.
You glanced over at where the football field was to see if practice was still ongoing. It looked like everyone was starting to disperse causing you to feel nervous. Once Alexis saw that you weren’t around, he was going to lecture you.
Looking back at the man in front of you, you nodded.
“Sure! Sounds fun!” You agreed, taking out your phone and handing it to him so that he could add his number.
As soon as he handed you your phone, it began ringing as if Alexis knew that your phone had been handed off to someone. You immediately answered and waved goodbye before you turned and walked towards the field.
“What’s up Alexi?” You greeted.
“Y/N where are you? I told you to stay near the field. What if someone kidnapped you while you weren’t around?!” Alexis lectured in a panicked voice.
Rolling your eyes, you exited the building only to find your brother running around in a panic while Michael was watching him in amusement. Laughing, you waved to get his attention. Alexis looked at you and ran as quickly as he could, enveloping you in a hug that caused you to groan when he body slammed you. Alexis leaned back and held your cheeks in his hands and it was evident he teared up from worry.
“Alexi, I'm fine. I got bored.” You explained. “So I was in the halls.”
“What if a pervert found you? Like one of the teachers?” Alexis responded with furrowed brows.
A chuckle was heard behind you as Michael appeared, which caused you to furrow your brows and glare at him.
“Let her be, Ness. You can’t ask her to sit there every day and expect her to not be bored.” Michael said, giving you one of his signature smiles, which caused you to roll your eyes.
Alexis dropped his hands and smiled at Michael, his cheeks tinted pink.
“You’re right! I can’t be overprotective all the time, especially during practice when I need to focus on giving you a great pass.”
You inwardly groan.
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It was that day that brought you to your current predicament. That guy that was shy and sweet is now your abusive fiancée.
You were aware of his anger problems, especially mixed with his narcissism since back then. But he never laid a hand on you until right before you broke up.
It was a stupid argument that was so stupid you couldn’t even remember what it was about. But whatever it was about caused him to give you one good slap to your face. You held your hand to your cheek and stared at him in disbelief before you broke up with him and ran off.
You were scared Alexis would find out so you avoided going home for a while until you were sure your brother would be in his room.
What you didn’t expect was to run into Michael Kaiser. He had exited a coffee shop and you ended up walking into him because you weren’t paying attention; you just wanted to get away.
His trademark smile formed as soon as he saw you, but it faded just as quickly as it appeared. His brows furrowed and he gently placed his hand on your chin, tilting your head to the side to look at the fresh red mark on your face. Tears threatened to fall as he stayed quiet.
“Please don’t tell Alexi…” You whispered.
“Give me one reason why.” Michael answered sternly. “Or better yet, give me the name of the person who did this to you, liebling.”
Your eyes widened. You had never seen this reaction off of Michael. He had always had a carefree attitude. Looking away from him, you moved his hand away.
“I just know how protective he is of me. It was just a silly argument and even then, I broke up with him.” You bit your bottom lip as the tears formed in your eyes once again.
Michael stared at you not saying a word. It felt suffocating to you and you just wanted to run off. You didn’t even like this man but the simple action of him getting angry on your behalf caused butterflies in your stomach. It felt like an eternity passed before you heard Michael sigh as if he’d come to a conclusion in his head and didn’t like the thought.
“Alright, I won’t tell Ness.” He said.
You looked at Michael, the shock evident on your face. This was something else you didn’t know about him. You were sure he was going to tell your brother. He definitely seemed like the type who would at least hold it over your head.
“In return,” He said, gently taking some of your hair and bringing it to his lips. His usual smile on his face as he looked directly into your eyes.
Oh boy. You were tired of being right.
“Let me treat you today. You need to see how a real man treats a woman.”
Despite the disgust you felt, your cheeks were tinted pink.
Sighing, you recognized your utter defeat. If you didn’t do what he said, he would tell your brother. You would rather deal with him than the wrath of your brother.
“Fine.” You answered in a monotone.
Michael chuckled and winked before letting your hair fall.
“Braves Mädchen.”
It took everything in you to not roll your eyes at his response even when it made your chest tighten. You would never admit he had his charms. He annoyed you to no end.
Michael had successfully distracted you from that day and you were able to move on. Then 3 years ago, your ex came back into the picture.
Because you originally blocked him after that breakup, he couldn’t get in contact with you and as soon as he saw you at random, he got on his knees and apologized.
When you decided to hear him out, he told you after he hit you, he realized his anger was out of control and he went to therapy to better himself. He told you he had changed and missed you.
So you took him back.
And you saw that he did change. His anger was controlled around you and he treated you much better.
Until the day he proposed after your daughter was born.
Sighing at the memory, you picked up the pregnancy test and looked at the results: negative. You felt a wave of relief wash over you, not realizing how much tension your body was holding during those few minutes.
Throwing away the test, you exited the bathroom and rubbed the bridge of your nose before colliding into someone. You really need to pay attention.
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” You apologize without looking at the person.
“Liebling?” A familiar voice called out, causing you to immediately look up and find the familiar blonde in front of you.
“Michael?” You breathed.
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masterlist | chapter 2 ⤠
taglist: @xamilarin @vr00m-vr00m @oshiimaiy
taglist is open
series taglist form here
normal taglist form here
Blue Lock is created and owned by Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura
Art is owned by Haru
©️nerdiel-has-no-braincells 2023 Please do not copy, translate, and post as your own. Reblogs, likes, and comments are ok with me!
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Anyone saying the live adaptation of ATLA was bad, does not remember the series well and/or does not understand how adaptation from cartoon to live action has to function. Is it identical to the original? No. Should it be? No. It's called adaptation not remake/remaster, dummies. I loved shifting more of the Zuko/Iroh relationship earlier and to the forefront. Y'all do not remember Iroh well from season 1. His ass got a whole retcon/rewrite to gloss over the very anime trope of "gluttonous pervy old man" to "talented and emotional statesman who is playing a role". THAT is this Iroh, just from the start.
Is the series "darker"? Yes. Is it ANY different from the darkness of the original? Nope, we just freak out watching real people burn to death. Because yeah a FUCKTON of people burned to death and most of the characters are orphaned, lost one parent, or were traumatized by their parents (or all three Zuko you over achiever). If you just now realized that or disagree, go rewatch the series. The message was always "the world is bleak but the youth will always fight for a better one, so we should listen and help them". In what way was that altered?
Oh you didn't get to see the canyon crawlers or elephant seal riding?? Ooooh poor baby, you miss the filler arcs. Yup, they were fun episodes, but they were very much episodes about teaching little kids morality. That's not this show. It is clearly geared towards an older audience. I am rewatching the ATLA cartoon and I skimmed most of season one, watching it but doing other stuff, because it was a bunch of filler. And the live action literally name drops that those things happen!!!! They just do not have the time or inclination to make a shot-for-shot live action remake. Because that's not what this is. Again, ADAPTATION.
It is more blatant about the message now, and somehow y'all still missed it. It added more lore from the books, cooler fights, more spirit world, more relationship movement. All the things from the original, just moved up a season. Which, my sweet ding dongs, will mean MORE OF THE SEASON 2 AND 3 CAN BE DONE SHOT FOR SHOT. Starting emotional arcs sooner rather than later could mean we get more later, when there is less filler! We could get the swamp benders episode in full. We could get the entire wrestling match. Hama. Boiling Rock. EMBER ISLAND PLAYERS. We could get everything! Yeah I could be wrong, but I could be right. And isn't the god damn Jeezy creezy point of the show that it's not all bad? To find the good?
In closing, any adaptation that gives me this June, Azula, Kyoshi, and the hottest tribe ever (how is everyone on the water tribe so attractive?!?!?) is not bad in my eyes. The acting was great, bending was sick, writing was solid as the original (y'all don't remember how corny and dramatic the show was so you? EIP were there for a reason). Give this an honest chance. It's not the original, but it shouldn't be. Because we already have that, we don't need another.
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quasi-normalcy · 7 months
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Star Trek series rated by horniness (as rated by me, an asexual, so you know its objective):
Star Trek: The Original Series - what is there to say for the series that invented slashfic, fuck-or-die, and Thiess's theory of titillation in costuming? The universe is full of greased-up pecs and scantily clad women wondering what is this thing you call...love? It's easier to mention the episodes that *aren't* horny. 10/10, for how could it be otherwise?
Star Trek: The Animated Series - It's a Saturday morning cartoon series from the 70s, and yet... 3/10, for the surprising number of scantily clad muscular guys
Star Trek: The Next Generation - Oh, we *start* quite horny; Roddenberry is keen to let us know that the android has a penis in the second episode; but then Roddenberry dies, and by the final season even Troi is wearing a sensible duty uniform. 6/10 for Will Riker, though
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - We've got Quark's, where the women are scantily clad, the holosuites are for fucking, and the waiters give themselves ear infections from doing too much oo-mox on themselves. We've got Jadzia Dax, who has three hundred years worth of sexcapades in two genders and will tell you about them at the drop of a hat. We've got Bashir and his sad blue balls for the first two seasons. We've got Klingons breaking each other's clavicles to initiate coitus. And we've got an enemy power led by the perpetual mind-melting gangbang that canonically is the Great Link. 9/10
Star Trek: Voyager - Weirdly conservative in its sexual politics. I mean, it goes out of its way to stick poor Jeri Ryan in that body condom, and there's a whole episode about space whales wanting to fuck the ship, and another one about Janeway wanting to fuck an Irishman, and *two* episodes about Pon Farr...actually, you know what? 6/10.
Star Trek: Enterprise - You know what, let me tell you about this series; this series is like a 14-year-old asexual boy boasting about his supposed sexual conquests in the hopes that it will endear him to the cool kids. It doesn't work; there's nothing genuine about it and everyone knows it; no matter how many innuendos he throws in, it's clear that there's no joy in it for him and he'd be happier if he could just go off and read comic books. Secretly, he wishes his friends still wanted to play with action figures. -1/10
Star Trek: Discovery - The show presents us with wall-to-wall gays who just...never seem to shtup each other. Like, I of all people know that sex doesn't define queerness, but...really? I guess maybe they're afraid of being less than wholesome? Anyways, 2/10 for that time that the Emperor went off to fuck a couple of Orions in the middle of a dangerous secret mission on the Klingon homeworld.
Star Trek: Picard - A series so sexless that it can't even show its main canonical couple enjoying each other's company for more than 5 seconds each season. And yet the chaste Jurati/Borg Queen pairing manages to be the hottest thing ever in the history of fiction. Anyway, I guess they technically had Agnes sleep with Rios in the first season, so 1/10.
Star Trek: Lower Decks - Oooh boy, we're at the heavy hitter now, my god. Completely, unashamedly horny. Gene Roddenberry *wishes* he could have done that orgy scene that people on Twitter were freaking out about. 11/10
Star Trek: Prodigy- They're *kids*. 0/10
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds - Not really a lot, surprisingly given their TOS pastiche. Still, we get some stuff with Spock. 3/10.
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livyjh · 1 year
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Unexpected Visitor
Din Djarin x Reader
Rating: EXPLICIT 18+
Word count: 1.6k
Entire work can be found on ao3 here
Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14
Din Djarin Masterlist
Description: You work in a brothel, an exciting new customer enters and you get to service him.
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It was summer in Imperial City, and had to be the hottest day of the year, you guessed. Thankfully, your normal work attire only included a bra, panties, and a thin robe.
There were pros and cons to working in a place like this during summer. On one hand, it was the busy season and you haven’t felt this rich in years. The heat made everyone horny. On the other hand, customers were generally sweaty and sometimes even stank from it. But you charged accordingly.
It was nearing 8pm and most of the other women were in rooms or on break, which left you welcoming any and all new customers when they walked in.
You could hear footsteps outside the door before the person entered. You were nearly startled by the sight.
Beskar armor, head to toe. It wasn’t hard to tell, the unique shine of it dazzled you.
“Hello,” you started, trying to keep your breathing even. “How can I help you?”
He stared at you for a long second. He scanned the room before turning his helmet to face you again. “How much?” He was straight to the point.
“Depends on what you want.” You informed him, shifting your weight to your left side and putting a hand on that hip, free hand wiping a bead of sweat from your forehead.
He didn’t say anything.
“Handies are 50. Blows are 75. Fucks are 200.” You raise a brow at him, wondering if he’s just got a bad attitude.
The masked man reaches into a pouch and hands you some credits. You count them. 200.
“Come on back… uh-“ you hold out a hand, gesturing, hoping he’ll give you a name.
“Mando.” He says shortly.
“Mando.” You nod, smiling at him as you lead him back to a room. “Ground rules; no violence, no shitting, no pissing. The rest is fair game.”
“Mhm.” He agrees quickly.
Once you’re both in the room, you shut and lock the door. You turn around to see the man placing his gloves on the dresser. It was the only skin on him you could see.
“Gonna take forever to get that armor off.” You observe.
“It’s staying on.” He spoke firmly.
“Okay.” You nod, heat pooling in your stomach. You didn’t know if it was the dominance, the voice, or the way he was disguised by the helmet, but something was intriguing about him.
You weren’t sure how to start things, unable to read his hidden face. You weren’t stupid, you knew that men of his kind couldn’t show their faces.
Nonetheless, you gathered yourself and walked over to him, placing your hands on his chest.
He reached down and wasted no time untying your robe before pushing it off of you. His hands were rough, calloused. They felt like high grit sandpaper against your well moisturized, dewy skin. The bedrooms were hotter than the front of the building, which meant you were sweating even a little more now. You couldn’t imagine how hot he was under his armor and layers of clothing.
The Mandalorian stepped back, admiring your figure as he held your waist. “Mm.” He hummed.
You could almost feel yourself blushing. This was out of the ordinary for you. To be fair, a lot of men you serviced were submissive. You had a dominant side that you used a lot, but it was nice when someone else was willing to take the lead.
He sat on the bed and patted his thighs with each hand, gesturing for you to have a seat.
You nodded, walking to the bed and putting a leg on each side of his hips to straddle him.
He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you in against his chest.
The cold metal made you gasp, but something about the sensation caused you to become wetter. You bit your lip and looked at the visor, having to guess where his eyes were.
“You’re pretty.” He cooed.
You smiled, slinging your arms around his shoulders. “Thanks.”
In one swift move, the Mandalorian flipped you onto your back, getting on top of you while staying between your legs. You tried to hold back a moan, barely able to stifle it.
Mando snaked a hand between your legs, pushing your panties aside and sliding his fingertip between your lips.
“Fuck.” You cursed, eyes closing from the pleasure. You could literally hear how wet you were as his finger slid up and down through your folds.
“Are you always this wet?” Mando asked.
You took a second to answer, opening your eyes and finally shaking your head.
His finger rubbed upwards against your clit, making your legs clamp around him.
“Ah ah, open up.” He encouraged.
You let your bent legs relax, the apex of your thighs widening as he pushed a finger into you.
“Good girl.” The Mandalorian spoke softly, pushing his finger inside until he could feel your g-spot. He curled his finger slightly, letting the rough pad of his fingertip graze against that special place inside you.
You couldn’t help the whine that escaped you, your eyes rolling back into your head.
He continued his ministrations, making your head spin when he pushed a second finger inside. You clamped down around his digits, making a groan come through the helmet.
He pulled his fingers out of you suddenly, bringing them to your lips. You froze for a moment.
He tilted his helmet just slightly, a silent “do it.”
You let your jaw drop and take his slick fingers into your mouth, sucking on them, licking them and swirling your tongue around them, moaning as you tasted yourself.
He pulls his fingers from your mouth after you sufficiently cleaned them, groping your left breast as you feel his hardness press against you.
You hear him groan as his hips push into yours, and you swear to your maker it’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever heard.
You gasp as he grips the fabric of your bra cup and yanks it down before grabbing your bare breast with his large hand. He cups it for a moment before moving to rub his thumb over your hardened nipple.
“Mando…” you trail off, watching him intently. You could tell that getting other people off, got him off. You wished he’d take off the damn helmet, put his mouth on you somewhere. Or just put his cock in you already.
Like he read your mind, he pulled back just enough to push the front of his pants down. He pulled out his cock and you practically choked on air at the sight of it.
It was thick, had to be 7 or 8 inches, the head was a deep pink and a bead of precum lingered at his slit. He pulled your panties to the side once more, lining up with your entrance.
He stared down at where his dick met your pussy as he pushed inside. “Such a good girl. Taking my cock.” He muttered, breathless.
You whined in response, breathing hard enough you thought you might fog up his helmet if he were any closer.
Once he was fully seated inside of you, he pulled back out with a slow drag, then back in a little faster this time.
You grabbed the armor over his shoulders, wishing there was skin for you to touch or dig your nails into.
The Mandalorian watched himself pull in and out of you, your juices soaking him so he could move in and out of you easier, faster.
Soon, he was fucking you into the mattress, helmet close to your face. And you were, in fact, fogging up the outside of it (about where his mouth and chin would be).
“F- feel so fu- fucking good.” He stutters, angling his hips to get even deeper inside of you. All the while, his hand finds its way between your legs again, rough thumb rubbing over your clit.
“Please.” You gasp.
“Tell me what you want.” He orders.
“More.” Your hand reaches down to press his thumb harder into your clit.
He obliges, rubbing circles against you hard enough to make your eyes cross.
You arch your back as your climax quickly approaches, the cold beskar on his torso pressing against your stomach.
“M- Mando, gonna cum-“ you barely get the words out before your orgasm rips through you like lightning.
“Ahh, good girl. Fuck, such. A. Good. Girl.” He emphasizes each word with a hard thrust into you and you’re certain you black out for a moment.
When you come to, he’s still fucking you hard, thumb on your pleasure button like before. He was relentless and you knew you were going to cum again.
“Almost. There.” He groans.
You nod in agreement, unable to form any words as you wipe sweat off the side of your face.
Suddenly, his cock is twitching, shooting ropes of cum deep into you as he fucking whines.
This tips you over the edge once more and you’re nearly screaming, eyes squeezed shut as you spasm around him.
He keeps thrusting for a good 10-20 seconds before slowing to a stop. He keeps his dick inside of you for a few minutes as it softens, finally pulling out with a groan.
He’s breathing hard through the modulator as he scoots back and stands up from the bed, tucking himself back into his pants.
He faces you and clears his throat. “Thank you.” He grabs his gloves, and as quickly as he came, he was gone. He shuts the door behind himself, leaving you there breathless and leaking his cum.
You hoped he’d come back.
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chirpsythismorning · 1 year
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My hottest take of all time is that Mike is (was) the main character of Stranger Things.
Now, do I think he still is? No. Not really.
TBH I would argue that ALL the OG's are main characters in their own way at this point, with them all getting somewhat similar amounts of screen-time across the board by s4.
But if we're talking about the first two seasons, Finn was indeed credited before both Millie and Noah. The only actors that were credited before him were Winona and David (respectfully).
Just rewatching s1-2, you can see very clearly that Mike is being framed as the main character, with his perspective being favored in big group sequences, with us following him places that we don't really follow others, and for longer periods of time.
What I find interesting, is that even though Noah revealed recently that the Duffer's have been slowly building up/hinting at Will's feelings for Mike since the beginning, it's Mike whose perspective we were usually seeing in all those moments.
In s1, we see Mike looking for Will, with Noah only having like a handful of scenes that entire season. We also get more of a focus on Mike's reactions in comparison to the other party members.
In s2, we see Mike making every effort to support Will all season. It's Mike whose reaching out to Will constantly, calling to see why he's not at school, going by his house, sleeping over for days and staying by his bedside at Hawkins lab. Although Will arguably plays a bigger role in the upside down aspect of the show this season, a large portion of Mike and Will moments focused on Mike's feelings for Will being shared through Mike's POV, and not so much the other way around.
It isn't until s3 that Millie starts being credited before Finn (and respectfully so, as she was arguably bringing in more hype in terms of fandom excitement back in those days, so I do get it). And so we're arguably going from Mike centric (s1), to Will centric (s2), to El centric (s3).
As a result, we also started seeing less of Mike's POV. Though, to be fair there are 10+ new characters joining every season, so EVERYONE is getting less screen-time, every season.
But isn't it so convenient, that when we start getting less insight into Mike's POV, he starts acting strange...? And we don't really get outright answers as to why? Answers that we would probably have if we had Mike's POV as much as we used to?
S3 is when we started getting Will's POV more when it came to him and Mike's relationship. Their dynamic sort of flips between s1-2 vs. s3-4.
Not to say we never get Mike's POV anymore, but when we do, it's hard to discern and so most people overlook it completely on the rare occasion that it does pop up.
Anyways, this whole concept reminded me of the main character shots we got at the end of s4.
These were shots that had multiple characters in the frame, but with only (1) person specifically at the forefront...
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YALL KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS???
Arguably, these three main characters storyline's are tied together in a substantial way, and how it all plays out could have been foreshadowed, by the very order and even blocking of these shots.
Think about it.!?!.
Mike was arguably the main character of s1, which means getting his POV at the forefront again would be going back to the shows roots.
Will is arguably the main character of s2, and so blending Mike's arc (ending with Mike hugging Hopper hmmmmmm... Mike accepting his sexuality??) with Will's unreliable narrator arc being resolved (ending with Will and Mike side by side hmmmmmmm... Will getting the boy??), and this combined with Will's connection to the upside down, blending perfectly with his wonder twin, El's storyline (El walking passed Mike and Will.... El dumping his ass again??), with her now at the forefront as the main character, arguably just like in s3, except now she has full autonomy for the first time in the show, she knows her worth, she's accepted herself. And this all coming to a head with those three and everyone in the shows arcs being resolved by the end??
BITCH???
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megamindsecretlair · 6 months
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Be My Little Darling - Chapter 9
Chapter 8 Chapter 10
Pairing: Loki x Black!Fem!reader / Plus Size reader
Warnings: 18+. Minors DNI. You are in charge of your own reading experience. FILTH. Angst. Oral (male and fem receiving), PIV, dirty talk, slight degrading talk, use of magic, and heavy mentions of survivor's guilt, negative self-talk, violence.
Summary: Loki is the exclusive owner of the hottest club in New Asgard. Dubbed the Nine Realms, each of the nine rooms represent a different realm. You are his second in command, working the floors and ensuring everyone is having fun. This dance between you and Loki has gone on long enough. You head to his place with a mission.
Word Count: 5,858k
Masterlist
A/N: WHEW! Welcome back, welcome back! Hope you enjoy because I definitely did. Loki season 2 has me FERAL. I love that he's using his magic more and that one scene?? WOOOOF! Likes are always awesome. Please consider commenting and reblogging to help support writers!
Taglist: @cantstayawaycani @braverthanthenewworld @monaeesstuff @chaos-4baby @dayjlovesromance @soft-persephone @mybonafidefeelings
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Your hand hovered on the door in front of you. Nerves bubbled in your gut and twisted. You lowered your hand and bit your lip. This was insane. 
But the club had been running itself ragged trying to clean up the mess the saboteur made. Loki managed to switch the rooms back around. He was forced to close the club for a few days as he did so. The employees were not happy. No work, no pay. 
You worked from sun up to sun down trying to help decipher the problem. You had magic but it wasn’t on Loki’s scale. Nor the saboteurs. You were a glorified tool belt, able to conjure tools and weapons at whim. You had stared at both of the cards left behind and the only thing you were able to gleam was that they were created magically. Duh.
So after a week or two cleaning up the mess, everyone was exhausted. Loki didn’t have enough energy to tease you normally. The club was due to reopen again tomorrow. Loki was determined to not let the saboteur get to you both. But you hadn’t been much help, always going off about the things you would do to them once you found them. 
You wrung your hands and stared at his door, willing him to sense you and take the decision out of your hands. But no. This was your decision. You drove over here, you climbed the steps to the apartment above the club, and you were going to knock on this damn door. 
You knocked before you could think twice about it. A moment later, Loki opened the door and smiled tiredly at you. “Darling…a pleasure as always,” he said. He swept to the side and opened the door wider, inviting you in.
The feeling was not unlike entering the chamber of a famous monster. In you went. Your heels sunk into plush carpet and you were taken aback by how open and inviting his space was. It was painted in earth tones, rich greens and browns and dark blues. His couches complimented the paint colors well, soft velvet fabric stretched over comfortable looking cushions. 
There was a half wall separating the kitchen from the living room, but everything was mostly open plan. Paintings took up space on the walls, of various scenes of bodies pressed together. The images were evocative and vaguely erotic. Of course they were. Loki closed the door and you turned to face him.
He stood with his legs crossed and leaned against the wall next to the door. You watched as he locked it. He was all angles and lines and delicious as hell. He wore soft pants and a plain T-shirt. For some reason, you always imagined that he walked around naked in his home. It was wishful thinking, maybe, but still. He seemed the type to not want to be obstructed in any way. Free.
That freedom drew you to him. He was completely in control of who he was. He owned everything. His warts and all. And still he walked around proudly. Like he owned the world and they just didn’t know it yet. 
“We’ve been working hard the past few weeks,” you said. You hadn’t exactly prepared a speech, but how did one exactly launch into begging to be fucked? 
“We have,” he said. A smirk played on his lips and you hated him. You craved him but you hated that you would never get the chance to unravel him. To twist him to pieces like he did to you. You doubted that he stayed up all night, rock hard, unable to get relief because he wasn’t buried inside of you. 
Your clit throbbed and you shook your head. Focus. 
“And we know that rest is important. It was practically a requirement on Asgard,” you said. You missed the feasts and jovial mood that clung to Asgard. You partied for birthdays, weddings, funerals, and any occasion under the sun. There was a full moon? Feast. A rare comet? Feast. 
“True,” Loki said. 
The bastard wasn’t going to make this easy. Fine. You came prepared. You untied the belt of your jacket and let it fall to the floor. Underneath, you wore an emerald bra and panties set. The bra pushed your tits together to give you a pretty cleavage and the panties spanned the expanse of your sexy ass. 
In taking care of your siblings and pretending that everything was fine, you lost yourself. The person you were on Asgard. Asgardians had to be a resilient people. Your home was on the edge of a universe, a veritable rock hurtling through space. You survived the destruction of your world, the ship, half of the universe gone. But the gods conspired to put you and Loki here and now. 
It was high time you took the gift the gods offered. Loki’s eyes darkened as he took in your body. He took a deep breath as his eyes roamed up and down. 
“I’ve no mood for games, Darling,” he said. His voice sent shivers down your spine. It was so deep and soothing. 
You crossed the short distance to him. Your heels still didn’t touch how tall he was. You pressed your chest against his. Your palms traveled from his chest, up and around his neck. You pulled him to you and kissed him. 
He reacted instantly, his hands coming around your waist and pulling you closer. Your core rubbed against his thickening erection and you hummed. His lips were divine as they moved with yours, suckling your bottom lip. 
“No games, Loki. I just want you,” you whispered against his lips. 
He drew away from you and looked down into your eyes. “Who are you?” He asked. His eyes narrowed in suspicion. 
You giggled. “I’m your Darling,” you said. You began to slide down his body, keeping eye contact. You sank to your knees. The carpet really was soft and your knees felt fine kneeling like this. 
“You wanted to hear me beg and burn for you. To give me what I want. Well, I’m taking it. We both deserve it,” you said. You watched his expression turn from suspicion to anticipation as he watched your hands. 
You tugged on the sides of his pants until they slipped over his slim hips. He wore no underwear. His dick sprang free and bobbed stiffly. You rubbed your nose across the head of his dick and he hissed. 
“I can’t keep fighting you, Loki,” you said. After the entire breakdown in his office, you had to come to the realization that you were hurting yourself. Punishing yourself beyond what was normal. You had a life before. Filled with laughter and a carefree attitude. You were somebody before. And you wanted to be someone again. 
You wanted to feel alive again. You wanted to take pleasure where you wanted. You were tired of the feverish dreams. You were tired of the pining. There were a few times that you watched Loki work and you got so hot and bothered, you had to fan your sweaty thighs.
You gave yourself permission to want him. And that unlocked some part of you. All the aspects of your personality that you repressed came flooding to the surface. 
You ran your tongue down one side of his dick and up the other. Loki groaned and threw his head back against the wall. “Be very sure, Darling,” he said. 
You smirked. You stroked his dick with your hands, using beads of his precum to wet the head. He licked his lips as he focused on you. 
“I need you, Loki,” you said. You blinked at him as you took him into your mouth. 
“Gods,” he moaned and his eyes crossed. 
“I know I’ve been difficult. Those were my issues to get over. But you helped me. And now I want to return the favor,” you said. 
You suckled the head of his dick, taking sick pleasure in the way he writhed and moaned against the wall. It was sheer willpower keeping him standing as you bobbed your head. His hands caressed your cheeks. Your hair was pulled into a ponytail so there was nothing to move out of his way. He didn’t need to worry about anything but pleasure. Nothing but your mouth on him. 
“You’re the furthest thing from difficult, Darling,” he croaked. 
The praise only made you work harder. You let him go with a wet pop and fisted his dick. You stroked him, switching pressure and twisting as you went. His hips jerked towards you. You took him back into your mouth with a needy moan. You loved the saltiness of him. He smelled like him, like sin made flesh. You hummed as you pleased him and his mouth worked but no sound came out. 
He chuckled as you continued, going faster and faster, bobbing your head and suckling. A mix of saliva drooled down the side of your face. He wiped it away and let you see the unbridled lust in his eyes. It made your pussy ache. To plead with no words that it needed him inside of you. 
“I need you, Loki. I need you inside of me,” you told him. After each word, your mouth dipped to his dick. Your filthy slobbering echoed in his living room. He was not selfish with his moans. He gave excellent feedback, letting you know that you were pleasuring him how he liked. 
You knew by now how to make him really go crazy. You increased your speed, going faster than you would have dared. Your hands stroked his thighs and his ass. His moans turned desperate, his grip on your cheeks sloppy. 
“Oh gods,” he moaned before busting inside of your mouth. His pulsing cum splashed down your throat and you sucked up everything he gave you. You licked the side of your mouth where some escaped. 
Loki went slack against the wall and he wiped his wet hair away from his temple. He panted as if he ran a marathon and grabbed your face. He kissed you, licking the inside of your mouth. Anything his tongue could reach. 
“Is this what you’ve been hiding from me for all these years? This little vixen?” He asked. He returned to kissing you, preventing you from answering. He kissed the corner of your mouth, your jawline, and your neck. Tingles of pleasure ran through you. But you weren’t done begging.
You stood up from your knees, Loki helping you the rest of the way. He was so strong. In so many ways.
You pushed his pants further down and made him step out of it. Then you yanked his shirt completely off, leaving him bare. Your hungry eyes raked over him. Taking in every delicious inch of him. His broad chest, his abs, his powerful thighs. 
You took his hand and led him to the couch. You pushed him down and straddled his lap. His hands ran greedily over your ass and you moaned. You cupped his neck and played with his hair while you settled onto his lap. 
You leaned forward and kissed him softly. “I want you,” you said. You kissed him again and licked his lips. 
He hummed low in the back of his throat. His hands moved up your back and then back to squeeze your ass. “I do love hearing you say that,” he said. “Your mouth could order my destruction and I’d find a way to make it happen.” 
“Never. You get on my fucking nerves, Loki. But it’s only because I wanted to deny how much I craved you. Have always craved you. On Asgard, you would have never looked twice at me. Here, it’s only because I work so closely with you.” 
Loki’s hand came up to grab your neck and he squeezed. “Don’t you ever say that again,” he said. His eyes were like twin flames of sapphire. “I would be drawn to you anywhere. Though you are the most beautiful creature I’ve ever laid eyes on, you’re so much more than your beauty. Your strength, your protectiveness, and that mouth. Hmm,” he hummed and turned your head to the side. He licked your neck and you shuddered. “The dreams I’ve had about that mouth.”
You were still Loki’s plaything. You were on top of him. You just gave him an incredible orgasm. And yet with one move, you were back at his mercy. It only made you smile. You were the furthest thing from healed that you could possibly get. You had leagues to go before you understood all of your issues. 
However, the thought of him being in control didn’t scare you half as much as it did a few weeks ago. Once you gave yourself permission to feel, everything came flooding in. And the loudest thought among them was that you wanted him so badly, you thought you were going to combust. 
You tugged on his hair and he drew his head back with a moan. “Fine. I want you. I’ve been wanting you. I want your dick inside of me. I want you to please me. I want you to claim me. Destroy me. Ruin me for any other man,” you said. You kissed a hot trail of fire up his neck, licking in strategic places, making him hiss with pleasure. 
Loki chuckled darkly. His thumb stroked over your pulse point. He could squeeze the life out of you right now and there wouldn’t be a thing you could do to stop him. Almost as if he could read your thoughts, he pressed a little harder and you gasped. 
He brought his hands back to your ass and squeezed your flesh under your panties. He kneaded and massaged your ass and you squirmed on top of him. Your pussy was dripping wet already and he hasn’t really touched you where you needed him. 
He took a deep breath and let it go slowly. It fanned over your chest. “Would that I had the power to stop time, we would never leave. My idea of ruin would leave you a pathetic, useless mess as I fucked you any way i saw fit,” he said.
You moaned at his filthy words. At the dark promise of seduction in the cadence of his voice. 
He hummed as he moved one of his hands to the front, pushing your panties aside and feeling how wet you were. He groaned in satisfaction. “Ah, my little Darling likes that, don’t you? You want to be used like a filthy whore?” He asked.
Your thighs tingled. You bit your lip and moaned. Words were too complicated for you. But you forced yourself to look at him. To show him how needy you were. His fingers traced the outline of your pussy lips and entrance and you whined. 
“Please,” you whispered. It’d been too fucking long. Too fucking long that you allowed yourself the touch of someone else. You were glad you waited. You were glad that Loki saw right through you. You were glad that Loki was there to rediscover this side of you. 
“I think you can beg better than that, Darling,” he said. He kissed your cheek and pulled back to watch your face. 
You huffed a laugh, too wound up to make a scathing remark. You still had some dignity. It was nothing in comparison to his thumb tracing just outside where you needed him.
“Please, Loki. Please. I can’t fuckin’ stand it. Not having your hands on me. Your lips on mine,” you said. You twisted your hips, grinding into him. Trying to take what he didn’t want to readily give. 
He tsked at you. “Impatient. You want it that badly?” He asked. His face was a cruel mix of mockery and interest. He could throw you off of him right now and he’d enjoy it either way. You were grateful that he just wanted to play with you.
You stared into his eyes and nodded desperately. “Please, I want it so badly. So badly,” you said. You kept grinding on his hand, running his hand back and forth while he kept it still. His free hand gripped your thigh, a solid weight. 
“How badly?” He asked. His eyes darkened once more, the God of Mischief making his full debut. 
“I’ll do anything,” you said. 
He grinned, bordering on mania. “Anything?” He asked. His thumb pressed between your pussy lips, skimming the surface of your clit. Your hips jerked and you cried out at the sensation. You were so fucking close. You thought he might play with you a little, for taking so long to come around, but this was near torture.  
“Anything. Fuck, Loki, please, I can’t anymore,” you cried. You sounded weary to your own ears. 
Loki ground his hips into you, making his thumb finally touch your clit. “No more fighting me, Darling. Wherever, whenever I want you. At the club, at your place, in the middle of a store, anywhere I want to bury myself inside you. Clear?” He asked. 
You weren’t sure if he was joking or not. You couldn’t concentrate as his thumb circled your clit in wide circles, driving your pleasure to new heights. However, you were coherent enough to catch the gist of his words. He wanted to use you whenever he wanted. The thought alone made you cry out and nod.
“Fuck, yes! I’ll do it, please,” you begged. You buried your head into his chest, unable to keep your head up. Loki chuckled darkly as he finally gave in. He increased the pressure on your clit and you moaned and whined and shook on top of him. In no time, you shivered as you came, your body turning limp and pliant. 
“Gods,” you moaned as the pleasure finally eased. You felt more relaxed than you had in five long years. You huffed against him as he held you close to him. He hummed as he licked your juices from his fingers. 
“You’re quite welcome,” he said. You laughed and slapped him on the shoulder. 
“Shut up,” you said. 
He peppered you with kisses as your body slowly recovered from the orgasm. That was nothing like what you were able to wring from yourself. The very act of Loki touching you made everything more heightened, more sensitive. It was insane how your body reacted to him. 
His lips found yours and you sat there contendly, kissing him slowly. “Not that I'm not grateful, but what inspired this?” 
You smiled. “As if you haven’t been driving me crazy since you first kissed me,” you said. 
He chuckled and shook his head. “I was prepared for your stubbornness to outlast my patience,” he said. 
You played with his silky hair. Your head was on his shoulder and it hit you, that you didn’t want to be anywhere else. It used to frighten you. But you couldn’t keep the world out forever and then cry about not being seen. Heard. It scared you more that you would leave this new existence never having been a part of it.
“It was exhausting,” you said. You were glad that he couldn’t see your face at the moment. You weren’t quite brave enough to look him in the eye and say this. 
“I turned myself into a shell of who I used to be in order to make amends for living where my family couldn’t. For not grabbing my best friend and moving her next to me, to survive. It wasn’t my fault, I always knew that. But I still survived. I’m still here and they’re not. But then, that’s just wasting the chance I was given. I’m still here and it sucks, but it doesn’t have to be as painful as I’ve been making it.”
You picked your head up and looked at him. This you could say to his face. “And when I look at you, when I’m near you, I feel good. Like myself. I want to keep feeling that way. I love the way I feel when you look at me. Even when you tease me,” you said. You leaned down and kissed him. 
He swept his tongue across your lips and you gasped. He grabbed your hand and kissed it. Then he moved it to his hardening dick. “Do you feel what you do to me?” He asked. 
You nodded. He stroked your hand up and down his dick. The velvet thickness of him made your pussy contract. Your mouth watered, wanting to taste him again. 
“The only thing I’ve done is make sure that you don’t give up on yourself. I’ve wanted you then, I want you now. All of you. Anyway, I can have you.” 
You kissed him as you stroked him. His words were too much. Tears stung your eyes but you refused to let them fall. You were finally getting what you wanted. There would be time for talking later. You loved that you were so familiar with each other, that you could have these quiet moments. But you came here for dick. 
You kissed up his neck, along his strong jaw, up to his ear. You teased the lobe between your teeth and felt his dick twitch in your hand. “Use me, Loki,” you whispered. 
A full body shiver passed through Loki. He grinned slowly and you had a fleeting moment of fear. Your words were the key to something. Because he stood up with you in his arms and you yelped. You clung to him, not used to being off of the ground so high. His malicious chuckle sent tingles up your thighs as he walked you to his bedroom. 
Here, the room was surprisingly bright. You thought he’d have black sheets and dark walls. But his walls were a lighter shade of blue and his sheets a deep, royal green. His furniture wasn’t as dark as you pictured either. His windows were open, letting in a soft breeze from outside. 
Loki laid you on the bed, lifting your hands above your head, and remained standing. He stood there in naked glory and studied your body. Your body felt electric under his gaze. Like you hovered in front of an electric fence. Loki kept a dark, manic gleam in his eye. You watched as his eyes glowed green and vines wrapped around your wrists.
You looked up and your hands were bound together and pulled against his headboard. “Loki?” You asked. 
“You asked me to use you, Darling,” he said. He waved his hand and a blindfold slid over your eyes. You jerked and tried to sit up. 
“Loki?” An edge of panic crept into your voice. 
Loki shushed you. The bed dipped as he leaned over you and kissed you. The feel of his lips on yours slowly relaxed you. “Trust me, Darling.” He kissed your ear and didn’t move. Leaving the decision up to you.
You came here to be ruined and by the gods, by the literal god above you, you were going to enjoy yourself. So you nodded and relaxed against the bed. Loki released a breath as if he was prepared for you to tell him stop. He kissed along your body, his hands trailing behind where he just kissed.
He rested his head against your chest and hummed. “You knew what you were doing when you wore this, didn’t you?” He asked.
You couldn’t see a thing past the blindfold he conjured. You could only rely on feeling, hearing, and smell. It turned you on that you were at his mercy. “Yes,” you said. 
He chuckled. His teeth grabbed the piece of fabric in between your breasts and he tugged, releasing it with a snap. The tiny sting made you hiss. You squeezed your thighs together, needing more. You were desperate for him to get inside you. 
“Please, Loki. No teasing,” you said. You will have plenty of chances in the future for teasing. For learning each other's bodies. You wanted to get fucked. 
Loki only chuckled. “I finally get to fuck you and you want me to rush?” He asked.
“Yes, please,” you said. He licked your chest, right beneath your bra. Your breath stuttered in your chest. 
“I will do whatever the hell I want with you. Including, taking my time to savor this offering,” he said. 
His hands gripped your knees and pried your legs apart. You gasped at the dichotomy of his soft, commanding voice and the way he gripped you. He kissed a wet trail down your tummy, nibbling in certain places, before descending between your legs. 
He pressed his nose there and inhaled deeply, moaning. “You smell delicious,” he said. He licked the outside of your panties and your hips jerked off of the bed.
Mistakes may have been made. You were prepared for a cruel, hard fucking. The type of deep, satisfied fucking that left you walking funny the next morning. Not this torture. Not the glee he took in holding himself back. 
He hummed again. He licked the sensitive area between your thigh and your pussy and you moaned. “Fuck,” you said. 
He chuckled and did it again and again, making you squirm. “You’re so responsive, Darling. I’m only sad it took us so long to get here. Guess we’ll just have to make up for lost time, hm?” 
He licked the spot again and your leg jerked. This so wasn’t fair. “Please, Loki,” your voice was a ragged mess.
“I’ll never tire of the way you beg,” he said. “Lucky for you, I’ve been dreaming of tasting you. Licking this sweet pussy of yours.” He kissed your thigh, gripped it in his large hands and squeezed. He bit your other thigh and you cried out. 
He hooked your legs around his arms and spread them further. He moved your panties to the side and blew a breath across your pussy. You squirmed and made a little mewling sound. 
He hummed and ran his tongue down the seam of your pussy lips. You panted and huffed, unable to handle this type of teasing. His thumbs spread you open to him and he sighed. “Even prettier than I imagined,” he whispered. 
Surely he saw how painfully you clenched. How wet he made you. You could feel yourself leaking already. 
He wiggled his tongue against your clit, and you jerked away from him. He pulled down his arms, pulling you flush against him. He continued to wiggle and wrangle his tongue around your clit, drawing out undignified sounds from you. 
“Oh fuck, oh fuck,” you moaned. You squirmed but there was nowhere to go. No choice but to accept what he did. The way he made slow, concentrated circles on your clit. He hummed and moaned as your arousal continued to leak out of you. 
Your moans echoed off of his walls. His hums of pleasure vibrated on your clit. The rumble in his chest tickled the back of your thighs. Your hands pulled against the restraints. You wanted to touch him. Feel him. His hair draped across your belly and thighs. You wanted to feel it wrapped around your fingers. 
“Taste so fucking good. Cum for me, my Darling,” he said. He kept up the pressure, kept circling, and suckling. Your body twitched and jerked until you finally came with a loud, obnoxious moan. 
Your thighs squeezed his head as heat and pleasure suffused you. Sounds escaped you, but none of them were words. You were tense with explosive pleasure. You flopped onto the bed when you were done and Loki licked up everything you gushed out. He hummed as you jerked from the intense pleasure. 
Loki kissed your thighs, leaving sloppy wet kisses everywhere. “I wish you could see the sight of you right now,” he murmured. “Spread open for me. Letting me see this pussy. Tied up.” 
Each of his words were like a stab of pleasure into your belly. Your stomach twisted with desire, even after the orgasm you just had. 
“Please, please,” you chanted. Your wrists were getting rubbed raw from pulling against the restraints. “Let me feel you. Let me see you,” you begged.
“No.” Loki yanked at your panties, ripping them from your body. 
“Hey!” 
Loki chuckled. “I’ll buy you more,” he said. 
“That’s not the point. I liked those,” you complained. 
Loki chuckled as he climbed up your body, kissing as he went along. “Get used to it. I’ll rip every single pair of panties you own. They’re in my way,” he said. He settled his hips in between your legs and you moaned. His thick dick rubbed against your sensitive clit. 
“I can take them off.” Your voice was breathy. Finally, finally. Instead of entering you, Loki ripped your bra off. 
“Aw, come on. Those are expensive!” 
Insults sprang to your lips but his lips around your exposed nipple made you cry out instead. “Shit,” you said and jerked. The suctioning pressure sent ripples of pleasure through your body, making your clit throb in time with your pulse. 
He bit in between your breasts and then focused his attention on your other nipple. “I’ll buy you anything you require, Darling. Anything. Ask me for the moon and I’ll steal it for you,” he said. 
You tried to chuckle, but moans were dragged from you whether you wanted it or not. There was no way to be entirely sexy while at someone’s mercy. You heard your desperate moans. Your keening whines. 
“There’s nothing I would deny you,” he said. He groaned as swirled his tongue over your nipple. He entered you, on one fell swoop, and your back left the bed as you bucked. 
It was glorious. It transcended words. He slipped in easily, but he was still wide. He still stretched you. Your legs were plastered to the bed as he pounded into you. There was no gentleness here. There was no teasing, no grinding. This was fucking. He fucked you, used you like a personal pleasure toy. His groans were louder than yours. 
“Gods, the way you feel,” he said and chuckled. “There was no way to imagine this.” You knew he was talking to you, but it also felt like he was talking more to himself. He slammed into you, your body rocking into the bed with each brutal thrust. 
His usual calm demeanor slipped from him. His hips jerked, his hands searched everywhere. He didn’t know if he wanted to grab your thighs, your breasts, your hips. His hands roamed everywhere as he kept up his punishing rhythm. 
“Loki, Loki, Loki,” you chanted. Your orgasm crested new heights, building and building, yearning for the precipice. “Cum, Darling, cum,” he commanded. 
You detonated beneath him. He drove his hips in further, hitting your G-spot and you cried and bucked off of the bed. You squeezed the hell out of his dick and he cried out one more time, before joining you. His hips stuttered as he unloaded inside of you, shooting his cum into your warm, wet pussy. 
Your body writhed as you came, out of your control, and not the least bit scary. Tears sprang to your eyes again, the immense intensity robbed you of all thought. “Oh Darling,” Loki moaned as the tears slipped past your blindfold. 
His dick twitched inside your entrance and you filed that information away for later. Your mouth turned dry. You should have known better than to play with a god. He was insane. Built for pleasure. He had hundreds of years to perfect this. To build up the skills necessary to make you cum with just a crook of his fingers. Gods, how you loved it. 
He slipped out slowly, he was still partially hard. He ripped the blindfold off of you. The low light was enough to burn your eyes. Loki wiped away the tears on your face and smiled at you. 
You smiled back and he kissed you. He licked your nose and then your lips. “I want another one,” he said.
“What?” 
He leaned back and picked you up like you were nothing. He flipped you onto your stomach, grabbing your hips and pulling your ass into the air. You groaned as he spread you open. “I don’t have another one,” you complained. 
He chuckled as he slapped your ass, watching it jiggle. He groaned. “Find one,” he said.
Then, he slammed his hips back into you, his dick spearing into you. He was on a mission. Fucking you, pounding you. You twisted your head to look at him a bit. His head was thrown back, his hair a twisted mess about his shoulders. He looked like he was in another realm of pleasure, that there was only you and him and the unadulterated bliss bouncing between you. 
He slapped your ass again and you used your elbows for leverage, to throw your ass back on him. To match his long strokes. He angled his hips and hit your G-spot. He wrapped your ponytail around his hand, down to the scrunchie and pulled. You began to ramble, cry, and moan as he kept hitting that spot. He used it for target practice, hitting it and enjoying the sounds you made.
“That’s it, Darling. Bounce on this cock. Crave it. I’ll give it to you anytime you need. When you can’t think straight. When you’re so blind with pleasure that you’ll let me take you whenever I want. I will remake you how I want,” he said. 
Your body wound too tight. Like a rubber band snapping, you came once more. Dark spots winked in and out of your vision. You moaned into the sheets, flooding his dick with your arousal. He talked you through it.
“You beautiful fucking creature,” he moaned. Each word was a deeper stroke. On the last word, he came and stuffed you full of cum again. The hot, bursting cum leaked out of you and down your thighs. 
You groaned and shivered as the last dregs of the orgasm wore you out. You sniffled as you collapsed onto the bed. Loki’s huffs fanned across your back as he gripped you and held you still.
His dick stopped twitching and he left you on a slow glide. He collapsed next to you. You barely kept your eyes open. 
“Loki,” you whimpered. You felt like a used mess. When a god delivered, he really delivered. 
“Come here, Darling,” he said. He maneuvered you until you were tucked against him. He conjured a warm washcloth and cleaned you up. You groaned at the feeling. You couldn’t take anymore. He shushed you and kissed your cheeks. He cleaned you off and then tossed the cloth to the floor. 
He pulled you against him and snuggled his face into your neck. “Rest well, Darling. There’s lots more to come.” 
You relaxed against him instantly. As if he commanded that too. Perhaps he did. You didn’t care. You snuggled into the furnace of his body. His heat enveloped you. He raised a blanket over the two of you and you were out like a light.
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Masterlist | Chapter 8 | Chapter 10
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304blur · 6 months
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"a mere knock-off can never beat the real thing" they say..
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pairing: yandere!dollmaker!antiqueshopowner!scara x gn!reader
warning(s): obsessive behavior, stalker, reader gets injured i'm so sorry, weird ass copies of you he does imaginary tea parties with.. gory situation :( happy halloween, everyone.
summary: ever since you've stepped in that little antique shop in your town, you've felt like someone's watching you. you tell yourself that "oh it's fine i'm just paranoid!" but, really, you couldn't sleep without having this odd feeling that someone's spectating your daily life. you couldn't just shrug this feeling off.
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"I can't sleep."
you mumbled to yourself in your bed. Your bedroom was dark, and you can only hear your A/C blasting cold air into the area. it was one of the hottest periods of the year, and the heat was killing you. you cursed global warming for existing, and that coincidentally made your days even more hot and humid. you realize that you can't get a wink of sleep, and your eyes aren't feeling heavy yet, even though you've been watching tons of asmr videos for 2 hours. your clock shows that it's now 12:45am, and you have a dentist appointment at 7am. you're definitely gonna wake up grumpy. you stand up, feet on the ground, hoping that walking around your apartment and grabbing a glass of milk would somehow help you in this time of crisis. you open your door, the loud squeaking sound of the door irritates you, and you wonder if that woke the neighbors. you walk to your kitchen, bumping into some furniture in the process. you walk over to the fridge, hoping that milk isn't the only thing that you'll be consuming tonight. you opened the doors of your refridgerator, and inspected the inside. you only have.. juice packets, milk, cheese, wheat bread, water, an opened can of baked beans, raisins, and a box of chocolates..? it's one of the more expensive brands, neatly wrapped with a purple ribbon. you never remembered buying it, not even a fragment of a memory. but you were absentminded, and decided on the chocolate. it's better than the milk, anyways. you closed your fridge door, and sat on your kitchen counter stool. you placed the fancily packaged chocolate box onto the kitchen counter, and opened it, the chocolates were heart-shaped. how off-season. you didn't mind though, since they were cute. so, you popped one of those heart chocolates in your mouth, they tasted good, as expected of an expensive chocolate brand. but the aftertaste.. was odd.. sort of like.. a chemical taste. and before you could even begin to pick up anotber piece of chocolate, your eyes droop, and you steadily started to fall unconscious, you couldn't even move. but before you passed out completely, you felt someone catch you, and you managed to pick up their voice.
"gotcha."
... you wake up, in a old, and dimly lit room. weird, you don't remember there being an extra room in your cramped apartment. then, before you could look around to process the situation you're in, someone got up, and ran toward your direction. your fight or flight senses awoke within you, as you tried to move out of the way, but you realize you're tied to a chair, so you only fall down, helpless, and vulnerable. You couldn't speak, because.. well. duct tape was placed on your mouth. and you can't feel your lips.
"welcome to your new room!"
you look up at the owner of the voice. a man with dark indigo hair, with a single light purple highlight in his bangs, with berry-colored irises, red eyeliner, porcelain skin as pale as the moon and a round face, but he looks to be around his 20s. he grabs the sides of the chair, and places the chair (with you taped on it) upright. your many questions were muffled by the tape on your mouth, he smiles and roughly rips the sticky plastic off your numb lips.
"what the- who- let me go!"
you only managed to yell these words at him. he smiles sinisterly, cupping your face in his hands shamelessly, as he whispered these words.
"i'm your boyfriend, silly."
boyfriend? seriously? you've been pre-determined to be single ever since you came out of your mother's womb. he strokes your chin with the back of his palm, and offered,
"you hungry? you looked so cute when you were walking around, looking for food, like a starved puppy."
yikes. that's a really weird comparison. this guy is bad news, so you shake your head no. he looked a little sad, but he smiled at you again. what a creep.
"shame. i could've shown you how good of a cook I am."
he kneels down at your eye level and holds your hands carefully, like you're a porcelain doll he wouldn't want to break. you try to look around, and assess where the hell you ended up in, but he grabs your cheeks with his one hand, and makes you face towards him, his grip on your face tightening.
"if curiousity truely killed the cat, you'd be brutally murdered, right here, right now. but, if you REALLY want to see the imperfect works of art i've made of you, then i'll let you see."
he roughly lets go of your face, and walks out of the room, putting on a leather glove. you look around to find seemingly lifeless naked corpses, but as you squint your eyes to adjust to the sight, you quickly realize that they are handmade copies, of you. dolls, that look exactly like you. not only do they look like you in aspects of the face, but the moles on the dolls are eerily accurate. it's detailed, down to the bruises you accidentaly get when you wake up, and to the shape of your fingers, and length of your fingernails. but what you see out of that door surprises you. it's the antique shop you visited.
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it's been about 4 months since you were taken from your apartment. you discover many new things about this guy, like how he runs the antique shop you dropped by, and how his mother came up with a crazy name like scaramouche. he changed your restraints from duct tape to shackles, and he feeds you, but he monitors your diet tediously, and he is very careful not to feed you anything that'll give your brain energy to think about escaping. he's starving you, but he says it's for your own good, because he's a good "boyfriend". he fed you his leftovers as a "reward", or so he says. he slobbered his saliva all over the remaining meat left on the bone of the meat, and made sure all of the things he left on the plate had some part of him you can eat unnoticed. it's quite ironic, since he beat you black and blue if you ever attempted to escape, he even watches you sleep. scaramouche was out for groceries, and the store was closed. you took this as the ultimate chance to escape. you were kneeling on the cold, damp floor of the little prison that scaramouche calls his back room, frantically trying to free themselves from your metal shackles. your right foot was aching. the metal shackles bound your foot tightly, and you were desperate to break free, despite being so tired. the room was humid, and you were sweating profusely. your own sweat acted as a sort of lubricant, as you try to squeeze your foot out. but your foot didn't fit through. then, you remembered that scaramouche left a metal pipe laying around after threatening you and to nail your feet to the floor if you kept trying to escape. you look around for it, and you reached out toward the tower of boxes it was on. the pipe fell onto the floor with a loud 'clang!' sound. and you had the craziest idea you've ever thought of.
you thought of doing it anyways, since having a crushed foot is better than staying with that psycho. you tore a piece of cloth off your shirt, and you put it in your mouth, acting as a sort of a muffler for the screams you're about to rip out of your throat. you grab the metal pipe, and with a deep breath, and a background sound check for any signs of your captor. you were on the verge of having a mental breakdown, the waves of heat radiating from the sun outside, seeping into the basement, your head spins, and it feels like the world's warping, the smell of your own body odor adds to your headache, it would be the worst thing you've ever smelled in your life. you shook your head, thinking that being in this pathetic state would be a waste of time, so you stretch your body to its' limits, without breaking any bones, so your body can still handle crawling on the floor after you shatter your foot. you sucessfully grabbed the metal pole, looking up to the wooden ceiling, praying to whoever would listen to minimize the pain of this. you inhale, exhale and bit into the dirty cloth in your mouth, prepared to hit the metal with all your might, and hit the spot in the shackles that had a gap.
it broke, and the sharp, agonizing pain that shot into your foot was incomparable to any injury you had before. you couldn't even bare to look at your injury, but you had no choice to, since you had to make sure your foot could squeeze through the newly made gap. the rusty metal had an opening now, and you could fit your foot through. you free yourself from the shackles, quickly making use of your freedom to stack boxes to the basement window. you whack the metal pipe against the lock on the window, the lock now broken, you sucessfully escape the dreadful basement, your pitiful, dirty hands gripping onto the grass and ground to lift yourself outside, you use the metal pipe to assist your weak muscles, and now you're on the ground, the smell of grass and the fresh air brought tears to your eyes, after months of only smelling the paint from the paint scaramouche stored in his basement, and your own body odor. you weakly crawled to the nearest open store you could see. a pharmacy. it seemed like the universe really was on your side the whole time. you tapped the glass door with the pipe you had in hand, then a green haired young man with glasses opened the door, looking down, to find you, a severely injured and malnourished individual, covered in bruises, and dried blood. he did not hesitate to help you, and asked for assistance from someone in his store, a little girl with purple hair. they handled you with care, the young man calling up some more help from the other shopkeepers, they carried you upstairs, to a bedroom, and they carefully laid you onto the bed. you knew that this was salvation, you didn't care if you looked like a mess, you passed out, on the soft mattress. you missed this, so, so much. you were too occupied relishing in this bliss of being saved, you never noticed that one of the people who saved you, was your captor, smiling behind a face mask, as he wrapped your injured foot with a bandage, tenderly holding your hand, whispering under his breath, as the others are busy helping eachother patch you up.
"i'm impressed."
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notes: happy halloween, everyone! a gory treat from yours truly.
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bliss-in-the-void · 8 months
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Some of the lyrics for Jujutsu Kaisen Season 2 Part 2 OP, “SPECIALZ” by King Gnu. I will now give my analysis, since this gave me so many feelings. It seems to me this is a sort of pseudo-convo between Satoru and Suguru.
“I love you baby, let’s keep eulogizing” - SatoSugu mourning the loss of their once happy life together (they both canonically thought about it when they were alone). They’re stuck in the past.
“No matter how ignorant, no matter how homeless” - they kept ignoring the reality (Suguru kept telling himself he was on the right path by leaving Satoru and Satoru kept ignoring the execution order on Suguru) and the two feel displaced and away from home without each other.
“Every heart-burning move” - it hurts to carry on without the other, and to constantly meet on opposing sides
“Once we start running, it’s unable to turn back” - they’ve both made their beds and they have to lay in them no matter how much they wish they could turn back time.
And then later on in the lyrics:
“No, no, no! No more composure. A lifetime of wandering in a maze” - Satoru is tired of putting up a mask in front of everyone, acting like he is fine, when the entire time since he’s been without Suguru life has felt more and more complicated and overwhelming.
“No matter what others say, ‘you are my special’” - despite the execution order, despite everyone calling Suguru evil, the worst sorcerer who ever lived, a disgrace, Satoru only ever saw him as his “very best friend, his one and only.”
“‘Get lost in me’ only words that protect yourself. How long are you gonna keep doing this? ‘Get lost in me’” - this could imply that Satoru could have offered for Suguru to forget about his pursuits and be with Satoru instead. Maybe Satoru believed if he loved Suguru enough it would make him ‘come to his senses’.
“Won’t regret the way of life, this is the path I chose” - Suguru refusing to abandon his new way of life, causing a rift between himself and Satoru.
“Please answer me, I wanna feel your heatwave. Blue flame flow from hypothermia” - Satoru wanting Suguru to say yes, to warm him back up after he left him so cold. Flames are the hottest when they are blue, and heating someone too quickly with something as hot as blue flames would send them into shock and potentially heart failure. This could be Satoru saying ‘yes, you left me in the cold and I want you back and I don’t care if the force of you kills me, I’ll take it full-force’
“Don’t deceive romantically, just cut to the chase. No longer get drunk on this love song” - Suguru saying ‘stop lying to yourself just because you love me, you know you need to kill me’
“I love you baby, I love you baby” - Satoru’s stubborn answer, refusal to not love Suguru
In the outro:
“We are special, no more composure” - this will be the arc where Satoru finally drops his happy facade, he can no longer ignore what Suguru’s loss has put him through
“We are special, stay as who you are” - Satoru willing Suguru to remain who he remembers him by, despite everything that has happened
“We are special, be special all the way” - Satoru believes he and Suguru are still the strongest, he himself escaped death once, why can’t Suguru do the same? He’s special too. Maybe he’s still in there.
“We are special, no matter what others say, you are my special” - even now, Satoru still feels the exact same way for Suguru that he always has.
And that will prove to once again be his kryptonite.
Hats off to King Gnu, this was amazingly done <3
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Okay this may be my hottest take ever but I… bear with me… dislike how popular Ineffable Husbands is. Let me explain. Good Omens has been an incredibly important book for me since the first time I opened it at 11 years old. It’s shaped everything from my writing style to my views on society and the world. It’s safe to say I’ve read this book 8 times at least.
Season 1, also very dear to me. I loved seeing these characters on screen and although some parts were different or cut, everyone worked so hard in their roles that it brought the book to life.
Now, here’s where I get lost. Good Omens is a story about the end of the world, and while yes its “main” characters are an angel and a demon who are very fond of the world and each other, the simple fact is that they aren’t what’s important about the story. They are fun and deep and amazing characters, but so are The Them, and Anathema and Newt, and Agnes Nutter, and Shadwell and Madam Tracy, and Warlock, and the four horsemen (and other four horsemen)/ bikers of the apocalypse, and that one televangelist that lives rent free in my head, and that guy who sees the trees take over the city and R. P. Tyler and everyone else.
They make the story. They are the humans— sans the four bikers—, and this gets lost in the fandom and, dare I say it, season two. I will say right now that I adore season 2, it’s what I’ve waited 4 years for and I would never ever criticize Neil Gaiman as I am definitely not qualified enough for that.
But.
Season 2 makes it all about Aziraphale and Crowley. It loses the message of the book and becomes almost a sort of rom com (for all our yelling and heartbreak and accusations of liar, Neil was right. It is quiet, gentle, and romantic). This is not inherently bad at all, but to me, it’s not Good Omens. It’s not the same. Crowley and Aziraphale were never my favorites, they were never where the meat of the story is at, so that’s where my point comes from I guess.
I am so glad we have representation like them. Middle aged queer people who have god knows what gender fuckery going on. But, sometimes I wish we talked about anything other than them. I wish I could find thoughtful analysis and writing and art just about the book (and even the show) that wasn’t simply “Crowley and Azirapahle aren’t together and they’re sad but then they are and now they’re happy.”
I don’t want anyone to read this and think I don’t like the ship, I love it, it was my first ship. But, sometimes, I just wish Good Omens hadn’t turned into a romance. I wish it was still the delightfully funny and childishly dark story that made me think, for the first time, writing was something I wanted to do. Because it was more than just a story, it was an idea.
TLDR: I love Ineffable Husbands, but I wish the fandom could talk about literally anything else for a change
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