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#second draft
faux-ecrivain · 3 months
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Draft 2 of the demon king request
(I believe this was one of the drafts that @a-bookworms-teashop helped me polish. This was also an intro for the demon king x hero reader, but it ultimately didn’t make the cut. Why was it rejected? Well, it needed more dialog and since I want to fulfill each request perfectly this draft was scrapped.)
(Unedited) Once upon a time there was a strong courageous hero destined to defeat the evil demon king and through many trials, and tribulation, the hero had eventually defeated the demon king. Of course, the people rejoiced and celebrated this win for years to come, at least that’s what they say. However, the truth is after you had defeated the demon king, there was but a brief celebration then everything went back to normal and you were simply another forgotten hero.
             The only one that didn’t seem to forget you was the demon king. Who continues resurrecting and often goes out of his way to court you, but that wasn’t entirely abnormal. As you have made many friends, and many enemies, that seem to have gotten the idea that you have intention of romancing them. No idea how or why, but they do think that and it’s caused you to relocate many times. Luckily your garden was unharmed throughout the entire ordeal and perseveres despite how often the world seems intent on destroying the only joy present in your life.
        Speaking of which, you are currently tending to your garden, you relished in the peace of the afternoon and the warmth of the sun. There’s a rare smile of your face and for once the world seems alright. Sure, sometimes your mind will drift back to the times of your adventures and you’ll feel a yearning to travel once more, however you never go through with such thoughts. As you were busy pruning your rose bushes, something blocks your sun and causes a shadow to envelop your bush. 
        You frown and whip your head up to face whomever is blocking your light, your anger quickly turns into annoyance once you realize that the one standing before you is the demon king himself. “Aren’t you supposed to be dead?” A sneer left your mouth, showing just how unhappy you are with his presence.
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wordnerdsworld · 3 months
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writing a second draft
a one sentence horror story for all the authors out there
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uncaaj · 7 months
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Scanlation: PKNA #12 - Second Draft Part 2
PART 1 | part 2 | PART 3
Writer: Alessandro Sisti Aritst: Claudio Sciarrone INDUCKS Code: I PKNA 12-1
DOWNLOAD THE FULL PDF HERE!
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elumish · 6 months
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sorry about your flight!
how much of a story do you have in your head before you start writing? how much does it change for you after you write the first draft?
Ooh.
Okay so I have realized that I have a kind of bonkers writing style compared to most writers I know, so this may or may not be a helpful answer to you, as a disclaimer.
Most of my stories tend to start by me having a scene / conversation / vague idea in mind. If I'm in front of a computer / notebook or in an easy place to write, I'll just start writing it. If I'm not, it'll marinate until I get to somewhere I can write, and then I'll either write it or I won't.
Some fraction of those scenes that I write down continue to interest me, and then I'll write more of them. Eventually, I'll finish them, or I won't.
For context, one of the books that I'm taking a break on querying because I need to finish the novel that I am actually under contract for, I wrote the first few thousand words and then picked it up again like a year and half later, wrote a large part of draft one, then went back to near the beginning and wrote a sort of different draft one.
Structure and pacing tend to be my biggest issues in draft one, partly because I basically always write without an outline and sometimes without a sense of what the end actually is, and so to get from draft one to draft two is generally in large part me figuring out what the structure and pacing of the story actually need to be. I will often reverse outline at that point, though I sometimes still find that I need to fit things in as I write them. At that point, I generally I have a good sense of the story, because I've already written a version of it. Some versions have much bigger changes between draft one and draft two, but generally the core of the story doesn't change much at that point.
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theteleterrestrial · 1 month
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I’m editing the second draft of my contemporary novel and am about halfway through :)
Are there any prospective beta-readers out there who would be interested in reading a novel in the very near future about a college dropout in Japan who embarks on a year-long adventure of homelessness, magic cat kingdoms and trying to make friends as an adult?
I figured I’d tentatively put the call out just in case 😘
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neck-tatz · 3 months
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drew this with just a mechanical pencil for part of my roomie’s xmas gift
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anyaslayqueen · 1 year
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OMG, do you imagine Damian with the "I'm a traumatized sarcastic and sexy bad boy" style?!
Like he being super bad and mischievous, and the Anya trying to approach him. And at first it's a flirtatious relationship between the two of them, but then it turns out that Damian is a sweetheart
And the drama comes when he discovers that Anya approached him for the mission.
This fake scenarios give me life
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vikingmagic33 · 5 months
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Hi! How’re you doing!
Can you tell me more about your Nano project? Is it gonna be posted/available anywhere to read?
(Feel free to ignore me if I’m being nosy) (I just wanted to say what’s up - and thanks for tagging m. It’s always nice to hear from you)
Thank you, sugar! Hope you’re doing well. Always love hearing from you. ❤️
I’m trying to keep NaNoWriMo for original work. This is my contemporary romance roughly based on the premise in my Gwynriel fics In the Name of Science/On My Radar (so dual POV).
I wrote the 50k last year and am still editing. I hope to have a manuscript by the end of the year that I’m willing to query.
Will be back writing fics soon though! Outlining a Gwynriel/Elorcan fic based on Mulan/Mulan2 and I’m doing a fic exchange for the holidays.
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taplaos · 11 months
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Been reminiscing about Second Draft oct with
@yeyepiz A’s and Thomas dynamic way back in the day Finally hit me why Thomas was so chill with A. If anyone remember a certain scene I drew back in the day it makes sense. So read to find out what scene it was
Wrote a short mini story if anyone is interested!
During the war they had low number of recruits, so they asked for volunteers. There was one young soldier that looked like 'A'. As a Sergent, Thomas' trained the new soldiers, so he formed a bond with his Unit.
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A year later…documents were stolen, everyone was on edge to see who the traitor was. It was the young 'A' soldier…Thomas was devastated and hesitated to go after him. His superior told him that if he crossed the border, we lost the war. Thomas' unit was ready to hunt the traitor, but he ordered them to stand down. 'A' was his responsibility so Thomas must capture him alone.
Thomas had him on sight trying to escape and hide from Thomas in the depths of the snow. Thomas yells out, asking for the boy to surrender himself. He wishes not to hurt the young soldier.
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In a shift motion, the boy grabbed Thomas' sword and sliced his side. Before he has a chance to flee, Thomas instinctively kicks the boy. Bucking him several meters away. ( A kick from Thomas was equal of being kicked by a horse. ) Realizing the boy was the first to penetrate Thomas’ shell. He couldn’t help staring at his wound and looked up to see the boy desperately scrambling away. Thomas couldn’t help but feel pity for him. Forced to listen to orders no matter the task at hand. In one last effort the boy shot at Thomas and said he can't go back to his country without the documents.
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Thomas in a rage had enough, before the boy could make another move Thomas raised his pincers and sliced the young soldier.
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White snow hues shifted to red as Thomas instantly regretted what he did but did he? Deep down he knew he’ll be punished for not following orders especially as a Hoodoo the stakes are higher. This was an order so it must be just…. right? “For the greater good” is what Thomas’ commander boldly say…He was just a boy force to fight in this forsaken war. He barely lived his life, and I took that away from him. They won’t see me as a killer but a hero for getting these damned papers back to base. Thomas, exhausted and wounded, grabbed the boy’s dog tag and papers.
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He better hurry back to base before a recuse party comes for me. Staggering side to side, he was on the verge of collapsing. Only pain and misery paved our path…this is what it means to be a soldier.
I only wish to say "Sorry" to the young soldier…
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(Here's that one panel scene I mentioned from the beginning from my Spectator Entry before the 3rd round )
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The text is small but it says this Nurse 1: The patient is unstable! Hurry and give him the sedatives Nurse 2: Please relax, Mr. Rupert. Your wounds will be fixed shortly. You are a hero for hunting down that traitor. Surely our country would be in shambles if he passed the border.
Thomas: Hjälte ( Hero in swedish) Nurses: “You’re a hero, Mr. Rupert
Seeing A for the first time didn't hit Thomas at first. Too many bad memories so he suppressed it. Realizing who A was he would be super apologetic and maybe helped him clear his guilty conscience. Either way, he wants to protect the young boy this time around.....
Atlas we both didn't make it to round 5. Would be great to see human Thomas bawling his eyes out for the first time to just say sorry to A.
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daysuntilnextaccident · 5 months
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why is my outline not finishing itself
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scifimagpie · 7 months
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me out of context giving advice to my coauthor:
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A little sneak peak into the beginning of My Little Love, Tell me what you think!
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indecentpause · 5 months
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Heads Up 7-Up
Tagged by @kaiusvnoir to share seven(ish) lines from a WIP! this is from the second draft of The Most Beautiful Puzzle.
cw: panic attack due to PTSD trigger
You expect the heavy rain and thunder. You do not expect something to explode outside, something so big sparks fly past your second story window. You also do not expect Josselin to scream. You jump up, tripping over your blanket as you unravel yourself. But you manage to right yourself before you fall, and you stumble out of your bedroom, gripping your phone tight. Everything is dark. “Josselin?” Nothing. “Josselin!” It takes moments to sprint the rest of the way to his room. Oh, god, were his windows open? Did he get hit by debris? The ‘knock before entering’ rule completely slips your mind. The door is open so you rush inside to see Josselin curled up in a thick blue blanket, sobbing quietly. “Josselin, hey.” You keep your voice soft and gentle and unaccusing, because it’s not like it’s his fault this happened. You take a few steps closer and ask, “Can I sit next to you on the bed?” Josselin’s sobs quickly spiral out of control, and soon, he’s so loud people can probably hear him from the street.
tagging @oh-no-another-idea @thegreatobsesso @cwritesfiction @aritany to share seven(ish) lines or paragraphs of your choice!
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randomruff · 7 months
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Redo of: White of Uncertainty
Warnings before reading!: Character Death, self-harm, mental breakdown and flashbacks.
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He didn't know how it got to this....
Macaque gritted his teeth, taking on another hit. Pain quickly becoming numb by the on slaught of attacks, before dodging again. Swiftly getting in his own hits.
Didn't quite know how it all falled apart so quickly...
His shadowed bo staff in hand, he used shadow wraps to keep his friend in place as he rushed towards him. Aiming for the final blow, a knock upside his head to regain his reasoning. To have the chance to him that the Monk wasn't as important as his sworn brothers.
Didn't understand why this was the end result for everything they worked for...
However before he could the ginger furred monkey broke free with yell. Not at all him giving him the grace to escape into the shadows as immense pain inclulfed him, enraged gold rimmed red became the last thing he saw before everything went black.
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Macaque gasped for air, a vice like grip tighting around him like a python. His eyes wide and frantic as he took in his surroundings.
Instead of destroyed rocky terrain and a cloudy sky. Dark wood and metal entered his gaze, vaguely registering that it was the roof of his dojo that he was looking at. the tension in his body leaving slightly at the discovery, closing his eyes with a relieved sigh. 'It was just dream' he thought.
Except it wasn't
He swallowed -when did his throat get to dry and sore?- shaking the thought away before getting up, noticing while doing so that his arms and tail were tightly wrapped around him as if to protect him from something.
The phantom feeling of pain all over his body told him that he didn't really need to guess why.
He huffed, cringing slightly at the way his sweat-dripped fur uncomfortably clung to him as he moved. He'll have to take a shower then, perhaps the rushing water will help clear his thoughts.
After gulping down some water and a mango he went ahead and grabbed some spare clothes. Turning on the shower before stripping down his sleepware, he glanced at the bathroom mirror. His body freezing at the sight.
White... All he could see was pure white...
A puffy violet eye was outlined with red as if it had been crying stared back at him, equally as shocked to see all of his colorful set ears in view. ears that got him weird looks when not hidden
His fur a harsh bright white, not a speck of comforting black in sight. White so harsh it blinds
And the disgusting scare tracing down a disgraceful milky white eye was there too. the sight making for too many scream in terror
A red staff outlined with gold and the horrifying strike of pain to his right eye flashed through his mind. Forever scaring it.
An eye HE took away and the scare HE gave
And then it was gone
Macaque blinked in confusion, brows furrowing as his mirror counterpart disappeared. Left to wonder where it went before the faint sting in his right hand caught his attention, looking down he saw shards of glass sticking out of his hand blood trailing down it.
 Realizing he broke the mirror Macaque stepped away from the bathroom counter, however he only took a few steps back before the back of his feet hit the bathroom tub. Suddenly the room felt to small-
Flashes back to that night, the night of his death and scar began to creep in. His body started to tremble as he relived his confrontation to his sworn brother.
"That monk is only using you Wukong! Why can't you see it!?"
"That's not-"
He just didn't understand...
he sqeezed his eyes shut hoping to shut it out. It didn't work... the argument started escalated into a fight. "What about Demon Bull King?! What about Azure?! Yellow tusk, and peng?! What about me?! Don't you care about us anymore?!"
"Of course i do!-"
Why did it end up this way?
Ragged breaths and gasps, loud and quick heartbeats, and the voices of the past was all he hear. "Then why Wukong?!"
"I-"
Why?!
His mind blank yet so full, threating to cave in on itself. "Why are you doing this?!"
"I'M SORRY!"
Silence... It was silent... The memories of the past vanished. Finally leaving him alone for hopefully the rest of the night, slowly, Macaque untangled himself from his limbs that were tightly wrapped around him. He leaned his head back, the ringing in his ears subsiding.
"Tell me Wukong...." Macaque asked, now staring at a large stray shard from the broken mirror. Reflecting his anguished face, tearing running down his injured eye. Pain, and loneliness captured in his violet one.
"Were-... Are you truly sorry?....Was- it me that pushed to far?...." ---------------------------'----
I HAVE DISCOVERED COLORED TEXT!!!!!!!!!!
@angstandhappiness my friend you truly don't realize how much joy you brought me with your feedback. So i did a redo! Hopefully this is better and more clearer if not tell me and I'll redo it again.
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radley-writes · 2 years
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heyo friend, I see you give some really valuable and smart advice so I was hoping you would maybe have some advice for me too! I've almost finished my first draft of a novel and I'm thinking I need to trim the manuscript, but I'm not sure where to begin with deciding which scenes should be cut, or shortened, or combined, because I think they all serve a purpose. do you have any tips?
Dearest nonagon - first off, MASSIVE CONGRATS on (almost) finishing that first draft!
If, like me, you are a horrendous overwriter, it probably does need a trim. I will soon be joining you with making big cuts, but whereas I am sure you will be delicately snipping away with secateurs and scalpels, I shall charge in wildly, swinging a chainsaw.
Which, coincidentally, leads us to my first tip...
1. BE NOT AFRAID...
You can't chop up your first draft if it hasn't been weaned. If you're still cradling your baby close to your chest, now isn't the time to start dissecting it.
So, put the baby down. Walk away. Ignore its cries. Go fawn over another baby for a while. Sever your emotional connection to your firstborn, so you can mutilate it at a later date without remorse.
(On a similar note, nobody ask me for parenting tips. Like, ever.)
The point of this rather morbid metaphor is that you need to destroy that intense emotional attachment to your work, before you can tear it apart and put it back together without fear. I usually let my first drafts sit for two weeks to a month - but I have a very short attention span, and a terrible memory! I know some folks let their manuscripts marinate a year before digging into developmental edits. There's no rush. You've got time.
In addition to this - a good way to be not afraid is to save an original, unedited first draft. Please, please don't start editing your only document. If you change your mind about cutting a darling, you want to be able to get it back!
Plus, it's a lovely exercise to compare the polished final product with the original turd of a draft!
2. LIST, LIST BITCH
Before I dive in and start editing, I like to look back at my original plan for the novel. I try and remember all the places I think I've gone astray, and decide whether I think these diversions add or detract from the story I want to tell.
I then replot my story, using both my memories of the first draft and the original plot to work out where I'm going next. This is where you can start thinking clinically about what to cut, before you even dig into your old manuscript.
Some potential questions to ask yourself:
What sort of story am I telling?
Should the narrative be fast-paced and action packed? Suspenseful and slow-building?
What are the integral core beats of the plot and character arcs?
Which scenes help to move the plot or character development forward?
You should be able to flag up any scenes that don't serve a purpose. That's the easiest way to cut bloat.
However, it sounds like you don’t have any obvious irrelevant scenes. So, there are two paths ahead of you...
3. LINE LEVEL
Not all first drafts need massive developmental cuts. If you've let it sit, if you've gone through your plot scene-by-scene, if you're sure that everything is guiding the reader towards your conclusion... You may well be right!
And if you're not, trust me, your betas will tell you ;)
I hereby give you permission to dispense with developmental cuts entirely. You might as well hop straight to cutting things down on a line-by-line level, deleting extraneous words and thinking critically about every single sentence. It's amazing what this can do for reducing a novel in size!
Alternatively...
4. GO APESHIT
If you're stuck for ideas on what to cut, but are convinced that something is wrong...
It's time to play big and brave.
Copy your draft to a new document and go fucking apeshit.
Turn your original concepts on their head. Give yourself license to divorce yourself entirely from your first draft, and think about how you'd replot the whole damn thing if you had a chance to start from scratch.
It's honestly pretty awesome what you can come up with, if you give yourself that freedom!
In my latest story, I've just hit the second draft phase, and I've realised a central character is actually entirely redundant. I want the story to focus on the main character's goal. This other character gave the main character a secondary goal - which isn't inherently a bad thing! But in this case, it muddied the waters and reduced tension in the lead-up to the final climactic battle.
It's taken me YEARS to get to the point where I can ask myself '...would this story be better without her?' and give an honest answer. She's one of my favourite characters of all time, but she's holding me back. It's time to say bye-bye.
I'd never have realised this, if I hadn’t plonked down one day with a massive sheet of paper and gone 'OKAY LET'S PRETEND I NEVER WROTE A FIRST DRAFT AND I'M STARTING OVER, WHAT WOULD I CHANGE'
I hope that helps!
OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER: writing advice is subjective. You're welcome to try this out and see if it works for you, but please, nobody take this as The Biblical Truth on how to chop up a manuscript. Grow wild and free, my little sunflower seeds x
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vivi-200 · 1 year
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So.. I've officially gone stupid and crazy for two characters from Eden's Garden after watching the Prologue yesterday, I hope you all enjoy.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43708491
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