So, I’ve been thinking about the future a lot recently, and I’ve realized that I literally cannot imagine myself married to a guy. A girl, totally. But the idea of marrying a guy makes me slightly uncomfortable. Even dating a guy, when I think of it, I see it more as a best friends type situation.
I’ve been identifying as panromantic asexual for a while now. But this realization has got me wondering if I’m just an asexual lesbian. Then I look back on my past crushes and see this list of guys and get more confused. Looking back, I don’t know if I just wanted to be good friends with these guys or actually wanted to date them.
I would just say that I don’t do labels, and shove it to the side, but I like labels. Labels help me understand what I’m feeling and that there are others like me. I want to figure out what I truly am. I’ve messed around with labels a lot, gender-wise, but sexuality, I just thought I knew. I’m fine with being a lesbian or panromantic, I just want to know which one I truly fit. And I just get more confused the more I think about it.