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heesdreamer · 22 days

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SILENCED

for my few silenced fans who still read it and love it as much as i did here’s the uncompleted next chapter before i took a big pause on it! Not a priority at the moment but thought I’d give it to you for being so patient

You’d grown used to the mundane things of the apocalypse, the simple day to day task and activities that kept you going.

Your hands didn’t get rigid and stiff every time you had to wash your clothes in the freezing rivers and your stomach didn’t turn after every unseasoned meal cooked over the camp fire. It wasn’t as simple as bringing in bags of groceries or carrying a loaded basket down to the laundromat but it was life, it was chores and it was simple and routine.

Even when you were doing it for seven, you didn’t exactly mind and it was the only few things that helped you clear your mind.

Sometimes it was Sunoo and Jungwon helping you wash the clothes, splashing water at each other and wincing when they tumbled forward onto some slimy rocks but not complaining when they had to carry back the heavy pile of wet clothes to hang up. Then it was Jake following into the woods with you, learning how to set traps for small animals and slowly getting the hang of spotting the prints of larger prey in the mud.

Sunghoon started to do the most important task by simply listening to you on a routine basis. You weren’t sure when the two of you started to pick up the habit of sharing your worries and thoughts before going to bed, talking in lows whispers and offering each other advice or most times just silence and a listening ear.

He listened to you talk about your fears of growing closer to them as the days passed and he told you how much he was terrified he was going to hold back the group, already feeling guilty that you hadn’t all moved on from this camp while he recovered.

You told him that it was okay and nobody blamed him but you bit your tongue on the fact that nobody seemed to want to leave anyways. No one had brought it up in the six days since the looters arrived, all growing used to the area and routine and finding a familiarity and comfort in it.

You knew it wasn’t safe and so did the others but it was hard to accept it for some reason, slowly spreading out into divided groups throughout the three houses and you felt a hint of panic at the fact everybody seemed to be getting comfortable now. Comfortable always worried you, knowing it meant guards were being lowered and you’d already almost lost each other multiple times in this area on full alert.

Sunghoon still wasn’t quite sure why he had gone out into the woods, tensing up every time you asked and shrugging with an expression that convinced you he really didn’t know.

There wasn’t any reason to push him on the subject despite how curious you were, knowing what was done was done and the events leading up to it wouldn’t change that. Sunghoon was still on bed rest so you hadn’t had to watch him face the full consequences of losing a limb in the apocalypse, not yet having to relearn how to shoot or lift a heavy piece of debris out of his way.

It made your heart ache but you had a good feeling he’d be able to figure it out, he’d grow used to it because he was strong and he fought too hard to not want to push past another obstacle. Sometimes, when you fell asleep and your body actually allowed you the luxury of a dream, you’d see him and the other boys. You were somewhere safe with big walls and plenty of water and fields to grow crops and Sunghoon was always there, a prosthetic arm that he was using casually and a bright smile.

Every once in a while it ended like that, giving you a soft fuzzy feeling when you’d wake up and start your routine again but most times it would quickly turn sour.

The boys in your dreams would turn pale with yellow sunken eyes, they’d be bloody and screaming and surging forward towards you suddenly with snapping jaws and most nights you weren’t able to bring yourself to put them down before they were sinking their teeth into your skin.

Those nights you’d wake up sweaty and panting, disoriented and understanding nothing but the overwhelming urge to get up and get far away from them all and the risk of seeing something terrible happen to them like that. Then you’d feel soft hands cupping your face in the familiar way they did, brushing your hair out of your wet face and whispering gentle things that always took you a few minutes to make out.

Heeseung would calm you down every single time you woke up from a nightmare, somehow always being awake to free you from that mental prison and you’d collapse against his chest with exhaustion and let him hold you until you were able to slip back into a quieter sleep.

If the other boys noticed how particularly close the two of you were, they didn’t say anything or at least not to you. Sometimes you’d see one of the younger boys throw Heeseung a look when his hands lingered on you for too long, some wiggled eyebrows and smirks. The older boys seemed a bit more hesitant to approach the situation but they were all keen and observant, giving you a heavy look whenever your gaze followed the leader out of the room.

You hadn’t planned for somebody like Heeseung to ever show up, never having considering feeling something so stupid and risky in this new world and sometimes you almost couldn’t bring yourself to look at him in frustration towards how vulnerable he made you.

It wasn’t something the two of you talked about but you knew he understood the way you felt, much more willing to take that chance and risk the extra hurt that would come along with losing you now. You were absolutely more hesitant to accept him and this connection and you were grateful that he never pushed you or tried to talk about it officially, satisfied with sleeping side by side and feeling his hands gently graze against your arm whenever he passed by you.

When three weeks passed since the incident and you were still holding down camp in the small cleared area, you knew your time there as a group was coming to an end.

You’d seen multiple corpses far too close to your area and you assumed they’d begun to move out of the city for the same reasons you had. They’d run out of food there and were searching for it out in the woods like the rest of you.

“What’re you thinking so hard about?” Your hands were faltering in their movements, sharping a piece of wood into a small point, and you glanced up to see Jay coming to sit around the unlit fire with you.

“I don’t know.” You were quickly sighing out, glancing at him one more time just to see the disbelieving look on his face before you were continuing with your knife work. “Just thinking we should probably be heading out sooner or later.”

“Yeah.” He said it in a large breath, heavy and defeated like he’d been considering the same things you had been.

Jay had been the most reluctant to settle down in the area and you couldn’t blame him, clearly the most careful and hesitant when it came to falling into that natural comfort that came with staying in one place for too long. He was a lot like you in that sense except he was more concerned with the groups safety than his own, something you were still fearful about fully leaning into.

“Don’t you have a run with Heeseung later?” He was asking suddenly and you paused again to look at him in confusion, wondering where he was going with this. “Well why don’t you mention it to him?”

“Why me?” You felt dumb the second you said it and he cocked his head at you with a hint of a smile.

“Are you seriously asking me that?”

#enhypen #enhypen drabbles #enhypen fanfiction #heeseung x reader #heeseung au #enhypen au #heeseung fic #lee heeseung #silenced

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jeres-red-g-string · 3 months

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eerob via IG stories

HELLO???ARE WE STILL ALIVE?????🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

#SILENCED #NOW WORDS #the gcds heels SCREAMING #käärijä #jere pöyhönen #kaarija #erika vikman

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howifeltabouthim · 10 months

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. . . but I see how little people care. Somehow my story doesn't interest them.

Siri Hustvedt, from The Blazing World

#uninterested #rejection #marginalized #ignored #unloved #unlistened to #silenced #quotes #lit #words #excerpts #quote #literature #the worst feeling #personal #siri hustvedt #the blazing world

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starcrossedjedis · 2 months

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Introducing // Det. James Medina & Det. Grace Yeung // "Silenced" [Working Title]

"I want you to give him a chance. A real chance, Grace", the older man said, the rare familiarity of adressing her with her first name clearly meant to manipulate.

As was the little conspiratory wink when he added:

"And if you could get him to stop dressing like a drug mule, that'd be great."

Here they are!!! God, they're still so hot. Obsessed. 🫠

tagged: @acabecca @akabluekat @arrthurpendragon @asirensrage @auxiliarydetective @bibaybe @bravelittleflower @chickensarentcheap @curious-kittens-ocs @darknightfrombeyond @darkwolf76 @daughter-of-melpomene @drbobbimorse @eddiemunscns @emilykaldwen @far-shores @foxesandmagic @fyoriginalstories @fyeahocsofcolor @harleyquinnzelz @if-you-onlyknew @jamezvaldes @jewishbarbies @katiekinswrites @kingsmakers @koiwrites @mabonetsamhain @mystic-scripture @ocappreciationtag @oneirataxia-girl @sgtbuckyybarnes @stachedocs @susiesamurai @thccraft

#nanowrimo #writblr #original story #crime #romance #my ocs #my graphics #grace yeung #james medina #silenced #OBSESSED #I love them so much!#(she's not in this post but I also adore Grace's daughter Olivia)#but Grace and James are just so.... aaaaah 🥵

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kxllakxm · 7 months

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cower in the corner of your mind, leaky faucet trickle and the SILENCE. lips sealed, white knuckled, the vibrations in your ligaments. you are all alone. the roaring waves of isolation. born screaming and raised mute. you say nothing because it doesn't matter and it never did.

#poetry #moodboard #art #mb #edited #speak #laurie halse anderson #my words #capricorn rising #taurus mars #mine #astrology #astrology moodboard #art moodboard #trauma #silenced #victim #we in a mood today #capricorn placements

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toiletphotoshoot · 9 months

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I WILL NOT BE SILENT ABOUT HOW SUSPICIOUS IT IS THAT LYSANDRES KEYSTONE HOLDER IS A RING.

#I #WILL #NOT #BE #SILENCED #Sycamore probably ordered it from gurgin on purpose #and then gave it to Lysandre as a ‘proposal’#but bc Lysandre is so dense he didn’t think much of it #then he died #pokemon #pokemon xy #pkmn #pkmn xy #lysandre #professor sycamore #Perfectworldshipping #prfr #kats quotes #live laugh love lysandre

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onlythegoodpretzels · 15 days

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Sketch and lines for Katie/Pidge helping Ulas after finding him prisoner on a druid ship. I love tiny people trying to keep taller characters upright.

For @whumpril alternate prompt 1, crutch! And Whumper of World's birthday prompt celebration day 7: wounded!

Fic WIP snippet below the cut. Comes from my main Voltron AU, so the paladins haven't met Ulas yet. She/her pronouns for Katie.

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These vents were dark. It made it easy to go fast, because she could always see when a room was coming up and she had to be extra quiet. Without Shiro to keep her attention she could zone in, not look through the grates as she went. She had her map and she knew the corridors and she couldn’t be late.

Hunk wouldn’t leave Shiro on his own in here, and she wasn’t going to do it for a second longer than she had to.

But the fourth time completely dark room made her pause, trying to squint and see what it was. Princess had said this part of Galra ships was the barracks. But this was quiet. Like eerie quiet. Shouldn’t someone be here?

Nothing.

She passed three more, completely dark.

When she checked her map, Katie startled when something hazy flashed in front of her. Then she blinked. Her breath misted, glittering faintly in the light her her vizor. It was cold. Very cold. She only now noticed the chilly sting on her face, so apparently the armor had uses.

Were the Galra colder-liking than humans? Shiro hadn’t said anything about that.

Katie curled her hands in as she kept going. It hadn’t been cold upstairs. Now she could feel it in her fingertips and in her mouth. Winter in a tiny corner of space. Why?

Up ahead, a grate flickered with faint purple light. She should have crossed by as far from it as she could. Quiet. Out of sight. But Katie’s heart beat in her throat and the cold felt sharp. Why did the Galra want it cold here? Was it servers or storage or…or…?

The room glinted from faintly glowing lines across the floor. It was bare-edged, small. Splotched and stained. Katie could see how white her breath misted easier here. It was freezing.

A heavy metal frame loomed along the farthest wall, and a Galra dangled from it, slow plumes of its breathing roping around its chest. It hung by wrists and ankles, arms forced up and out, legs pinned back and bent, head sagged forward over the floor. A heavy-looking mask obscured the lower half of its face, fastener straps crossed behind its head to loop at the neck. Shreds of clothing ribboned down off its shoulders, tassels slowly shaking.

Prisoners. Katie’s throat felt dry and thick. That’s why they made it cold.

But she hadn’t been thinking Galra. Did they even have a justice system? What did they even care enough about to lock someone up?

The Galra tremored in the quiet. Shivering? Katie couldn’t stop the part of her brain that stared, trying to tell if the clumped, stained patches on it were fur or scales or something else.

She needed to, needed the distraction, because this was already more than she wanted to know. The wondering made her queasy -- had they ever hung Shiro like that? Waiting somewhere shivering until they were satisfied? And ready to hurt him more?

How cold was Dad right now?

“Katie, what’s your --- ?”

Shit! Katie flicked the comm off instantly, but the whisper still ricocheted in the space.

The Galra’s eyes snapped open, the stark yellow like an error in a room so dark. Shit shit! Katie froze, skin crawling. It was facing right at her! But maybe those blank no-pupil eyes couldn’t see in the dark well?

No. The Galra’s eyes widened and it lifted its head, tufted ears swiveled back. As it looked up at her, Katie got a really good look at the nasty crusted patch of something at the base of its neck, thick and congealed.

Blood, her brain insisted. On a person that would be blood. The Galra twitched on its shackles, a harsh punch of mist bursting out of the mask thing.

Shit shit shit it definitely saw her! It was going to shout! Katie’ clutched at her borrowed Altean gun. Should she shoot it? Wouldn’t someone hear. Wouldn’t…wouldn’t that be wrong if it couldn’t move?

Before she could decide, a strange, frigid burst of cold rushed through the air, skittering up her back like it went right through the armor. Sudden sweet smell cluttered the air.

“N-nnnh!” The sound was half a hiss and half something shriller, so quiet Katie barley heard it. The Galra shook its head violently, ears going flat to its neck. “Ghhhh.”

Katie stopped breathing as the vent beneath her jarred, and a door underneath her feet opened. And a Galra druid drifted into the room, the awful point on the top of its head within arms reach of where she crouched.

The cold reached all the way into her teeth now. Katie had never seen one this close before. It’s robe looked slick and gnarled somehow, like it had the texture of thin treebark. Something about how its back moved set hers prickling and aching, like the joints were in the wrong places for her human-style brain to interpret it as something that wasn’t damaged.

“Okaxar.” The druid’s voice had uncomfortable dissonance, like it had two sounds at once. “Kal sakar Zagarax. Tra bakilkol gaal?”

Gaal. The word for speak. Katie only half recognized some of the others. She needed more time to be any use eavesdropping. But the druid’s tone swung up, then down. Mocking.

Katie’s mouth went dry. This was…this was an interrogation.

The hanging Galra full-body shuddered when the druid tapped the mask. The object hissed and shifted, sections moving down and up, and the Galra lurched. The mask settled, looking looser. It’s next puff of breath sounded more like a voice and less like an animal.

Not a mask. A muzzle. Which had been sealing its mouth.

“V-va….Vash…” The Galra broke off choking, eyes clenched shut. It swallowed.

It was going to tell the druid. She’d failed all of them.

The druid clicked, quiet and low. Even thi close Kaite couldn’t tell if it had teeth or if it were making the sound with something even creepier. It said something long and sick-slow as it reached to the Galra’s chest.

Except halfway there, the druid stopped. Completely still, claws starkly edged in the ominous light from the floor. Slowly, silently, it straightened, terrifyingly tall. The edge of the curved, bright porcelain mask-piece glinted, reflecting the lights like they were spears right at her. She couldn’t see any of the glowing eyes, but they must be just past.

Katie’s heartbeat thudded in her head, harder and harder with each second. She didn’t breathe. Shit shit, did it hea herr? Did it feel her, like some kind of awful eel thing? She needed to run, to get out, but if she moved at all it would know.

A weak snarl broke the silence. “V-Vash rib hagox.” The bloody Galra wrenched its head up and away from the druid. “Tra ket----”

The druid glitched forward, suddenly shadowy and see-through, and a second later it loomed across the room, pinning the Galra to the wall by the throat, the chains limp and dangling. Shit it was strong! It lifted its prisoner and raised its free hand. The lights on the floor burst bright, pulses streaming along them toward the frame, up its support struts, and down into the shackles.

The Galra shrieked, fighting the chains.

Katie flinched. The sound was alien, thicker and in more pieces than a human scream. She wanted to close her eyes. To cover her ears. But she didn’t. She needed to know when the druid found out about her.

Wait, no, she needed to run!

The druid clenched its fist and the energy stopped. The Galra sagged in the sudden silence, heavy plumes of cold mist dragging out of it. Its head lolled sideways, not looking at her.

Not --- wait ---

The Galra tensed and yanked its head away from the druid again. “Tra ketral,” it wheezed.

The druid crackled, like an electrical outlet ready to zap. Its hand snapped flat.

Whatever it was doing wasn’t electricity. The Galra didn’t spasm like it couldn’t control itself. Its eyes didn’t close and its skin rippled behind the mask, fighting to open its mouth. It’s fighting looked desperate. Voluntary.

This time, it screamed even louder.

This time, Katie crawled.

Moving at all zapped terror through her. But she had…she had a distraction. The druid was busy. She couldn’t get caught. She couldn’t ---

The scream stopped, and she froze. An awful, three-second pause, listening for the attack, the words that would send the druid after her.

Nothing.

The druid asked a question, which she was too terrified to understand.

The Galra choked an answer.

ZAAAAP. The Galra howled.

Katie moved again.

She kept to the rhythm until finally she was at the far end of the ventilation branch. Far away from the grate, around two turns. She should go further. She was too close to the druid, to the awful sweet smell choking the air when they made things glow, made things hurt.

But she wouldn’t. She couldn’t! What if it followed her? She needed to know what happened. Katie made sure her comms were still off and curled into a ball. She held onto her helmet and waited for something to change.

The prisoner kept shrieking.

In the quieter pauses, the druid kept speaking. Short, curt sentences. Demands? Questions? This far she couldn’t make out the words, and it wasn’t like she knew enough of them to be useful anyway.

When the next scream bounced around her, Katie dug her fingers into the unforgiving hardness of the helmet, like she could cover her ears. Since she didn’t understand it wasn’t the same as listening for real to something like this. She could do it. She needed to know if the prisoner alerted the ship. Somehow, it hadn’t yet. If it did, the others would need to know as soon as possible, if they had any chance of finding the lion first.

She was staying. She could do this.

Finally, finally, it stopped. The prisoner made a sharp, high pitched whimper, so much like a hurt animal Katie twitched. Then, silence.

A door hissed, far off.

Chill stabbed through Katie like an icicle to the back.

Then it was gone.

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For a moment all Katie could do was shiver, clutching her borrowed Altean pistol, every muscle locked and ready to fight. But nothing else changed. Nothing mateiralized out of the shadows. No more of that awful grating voice.

The druid was gone.

Katie bit her gauntlet and blinked furiously as tears tried to get in her face. It was ok! It was ok? The druid hadn’t found her!

As the pounding in her ears cleared, rough ragged breathing filled up the tiny passage around her.

Katie swallowed, skin prickling.

The prisoner. It…it hadn’t told the druid. It hadn’t looked at her, not at all, as soon as the druid entered the cell. And…it had taken the druid’s attention right at that pause, right when she’d been sure the monster was going to turn around and see her. She’d been right there. It would have been over.

And the Galra…what? Covered for her?

It moaned. So soft she almost didn’t hear it.

She should go.

Something heavy and frantic rattled in Katie’s gut as she shuddered. Her comms had been of for minutes -- she didn’t even know how long. The others must be furious. Shiro must be worried sick, if he even was aware who he was with right now. She had to get back to him. She had to get back to him now.

It was a Galra. She should go.

But --- but it had helped! It had helped and she’d heard…she knew what it screaming sounded like!

Cursing silently, Katie inched back to the cell vent.

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The room flickered dark now, the floor lights dim. The Galra hung trembling, head lower than before. Limp and still in the chains.

Something dripped from the front of the muzzle. Please don’t be blood.

It…no. She wasn’t going to it someone who helped her. They didn’t look good. Katie’s mouth went sandpaper dry. If they really were unconscious, she’d be screwed. No way she could move them on her own.

She slid down into the cell as quietly as she could. “Hey. You there?”

The Galra flinched away from her voice, eyes closed. A barely-there sound whined in their throat.

Fair, honestly. This close Katie could see dark marks across their arms where the energy had flared into them. She moved as slowly as she could make herself, wracking her brain for anything. “You don’t know what I’m saying. Um…shit, listen is…Yalki? Yalki.”

The Galra finally dragged their eyes open, squinting at her. They gasped, ears twitching. “Yhhh…?” They sounded garbled and wordless again. “V-vllll.”

Moment of truth here. If they decided to scream now, she’d be doomed. “Shh. I’m not going to hurt you,” Katie whispered. She hated putting her back to the door, but she forced herself to do it. She’d feel the chill, if that thing came back. And she needed to get the Galra down. And figure out how to say that.“I…Vash…” Yes! That was the word! “Vash kakorhi? Help? G-grax. Wait.”

The Galra didn’t yell or growl. They blinked, eyes lighter yellow than she’d thought they were. They lowered their head, spots across their scalp prickling. “Vllln,” they slurred again, as soft a whisper as hers. Softer, even, it was so hoarse.

Ok. Well that wasn’t bad. Keeping half an eye on the Galra, Katie stepped up to the corner of the frame. It held them so high she could only reach the shackle points on their ankles. Katie felt along the metal struts, cursing internally at how smooth and featureless they were. No exposed interfaces. Hunk would be able to do something with the machine, the power conduits, the joists and joints, but she couldn’t. She needed an in.

Damn it was weird being near them, with their long ankle bone as big as her forearm. Kaite felt strangely, impossibly small. She had to work hard not to keep glancing at the strange stony glint on their foot.

No good. She couldn’t do anything down here. “Sorry.” Taking a deep breath, she caught a central strut and hauled herself up onto the mechanism. It had crossbeams and connectors, enough places for her to grab and step to climb. She had to see more of it.

The Galra hissed and went rigid. Katie felt it, felt the tremor skittering through the shackles up into the frame beneath her. Every hair on her arms stood straight up at the sound, the inhuman toothiness of it. She froze.

She couldn’t do this without climbing up across them.

But then her brain caught up, as the Galra made a confused mewing noise and tried to look down at her, but flinched before they could. Sure, they sounded like a hunting thing out to eat her, but they were shaking. She could feel it. They couldn’t kick. They couldn’t bite. They couldn’t even see her down here. They couldn’t do anything about anything she did. She wasn’t in danger here.

Katie swallowed and kept climbing. “It’s ok. One sec.”

The Galra didn’t move or protest as she clambered across them. Their weird shallow breaths brushed her chestplate as she scooted past, trying to keep track of where the pressure moved so she didn’t wrench on them. They craned their neck, trying to keep her in view, then closed their eyes when they couldn’t turn anymore. A rippling shudder ran up their back, and this time she was sure they had fur there as it puffed up.

Their breath caught. Hurt. Not trying to hurt her.

Katie scrambled high enough to reach the wrist cuffs. Finally some good news! The hard-light chain threaded into the mechanism behind the Galra’s pinned arms. After anchoring, the cords continued down and joined in the center with a small panel right behind the Galra’s upper back. Not a bad design; completely impossible for the person on the machine to reach. But easy for her. Katie grinned and wormed her hand beneath the Galra’s back. She could almost reach… “Hang on.”

But she bumped something hard with the back of her hand. The Galra mewled, sharp and sudden, then cut off like they bit down the sound.

Shit. Katie hung on, trying to listen past the creaking and the awful grating gasps from the Galra. Why was she so good at hitting spots like that without thinking?

No chill. Nothing yet. She had to hurry. “Hold still -- uh --- grax.”

The Galra clenched their eyes shut and leaned down as far as they could. “Z-zhhhhr.”

That she knew, and it should be ‘zar.’ What was wrong that it came out like that?

Get them down first.

The panel had shoddy security, no two-factor, no nothing. Of course. Shouldn’t underestimate who might want to steal your prisoner. Katie hooked in her wrist console and the protocols took like a minute. She made sure she had a good grip on the struts, wishing she had the words to actually warn them. “Sorry.” Maybe the tone would scan. “Now.”

She deactivated the chains.

The Galra pitched forward roughly, arms spasming. They didn’t manage to get their hands under them fully and hit down with a rough thud, the impact jarring up their still-pinned legs. The grating force made Katie flinch in sympathy. A strangled, almost silent sound wrenched out of them and they kicked instinctively, except the ankle tethers hummed and sparked.

The Galra curled desperately, hands clutched near their face, and went completely still. They heaved in rattling, drowning gulps, but didn’t make any more noise.

Thank everything --- that hit had been loud enough on its own.

Katie dropped back down as fast as she could, trying not to stare at how much of them she could see now, at the dark purple of their back and the lighter fur that speckled down their spine from where it covered their neck and head and the very-intuitively-wrong crusted orange patches that jaggedly interrupted both.

At the whitish ends of their legs and the weird hoof-like growths on the bottom of their pinned feet. And the dark singed circles in the fur she carefully avoided as she reached in, where the druid had hurt them.

She deactivated the ankle panel as fast as she could.

The Galra folded instantly into a ball, limbs tremoring badly. Not fetal position, but too close not to tug terribly at Katie’s gut. They pressed their face hard into the floor, like they were trying to stay quiet.

She wished there was time to wait. Katie reached for their shoulder. “Come on. Get up. Uh, Ga --- no -- Zek.” Oh geeze they were shivering, so hard it felt like little punches against her hand. Was that bad? “Zek!”

The Galra choked. Their eyes flickered up at her an alarming creamy color. They nodded vaguely, or they buckled against the floor, she couldn’t tell. Panic clenched her hands. Did they know she was here? Was it like Shiro, and they weren’t even seeing her?

Katie cursed how small the vent looked up at the edge of the wall. It hadn’t been small before. “Come on!” she snarled, and, hesitating only a second, she dragged the Galra up with both hands and ducked under their chest.

The Galra cried out in surprise, a short yip-sound. Their weird narrow torso almost slipped right off her immediately, falling in directions she didn’t anticipate and brace. Katie stumbled, catching an arm and fistfull of fur. Then they scrabbled their too-big hands on her armor, the tink-tink of claws feeling all kinds of wrong.

The Galra heaved a desperate gasp and held on, shuffling to their feet under her as she stood. They sagged heavily, scrabbling to stay upright. Now the force of their shivers shook her too, so big Katie could feel it rattling in her head.

Ok, ok, assume that’s bad. Get them out of the cold.

Katie hobbled them to the wall, half-guiding, half-dragging. The Galra was so ridiculously big everything about them felt wrong, their enormous palms plastered across her chest, their bent knees in the way of her steps. It felt dangerous, but distantly, like her whole body know that if they spasmed again they’d knock her over. Their grip wasn’t steady -- she could feel it falter between claws and palms and back again. Polite? Half-conscious? Both?

Ugh she needed more words. And she had to get them both out of here. "Ok, come on."

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serenityquest · 7 months

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#ptsd #cptsd #silenced

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koreanaswego · 1 month

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Korean Word of the Day

침묵

Silenced

#korea #korean #learning korean #korean word of the day #silence #silenced

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random-xpressions · 11 months

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I wouldn't resort to a better way of silencing all her arguments except by sealing my mouth with hers...

Random Xpressions

#silenced #argument #won

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heesdreamer · 1 year

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SILENCED (4)

MASTERLIST

GENRE ➩ enhypen zombie apocalypse au!

SUMMARY ➩ navigating life 1 year post end of the world was already difficult as you avoided rotting corpses with hefty appetites and groups with various bad intentions. things get harder when you run into a group of survivors, 7 boys who make it impossible to run away.

WC ➩ 6k

WARNINGS ➩ death gore blood um zombies and everything the apocalypse brings…

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ Hello, me again lol Sorry it’s been so long since the last update on this I’ve had other stuff I was prioritizing but thank you to the people following and enjoying this story! The updates are a lot smaller than my usual works and that bugs me a bit but I have a lot planned and it won’t be such a long gap between each chapter from now on lol. Reminder to check out the playlist for hints and general vibe! NOT PROOFREAD but u knew that

“What are you even talking about dude, I beat you five to one easy. It wasn’t even close.” Jake’s voice was laughing out as he rested back on the couch, swinging an arm forward in emphasis towards his friend.

“No you don’t get it, if we had a rematch I’d whoop you.” Jay was quick to respond, a gloomy look on his face from losing so terribly and the younger boys broke into a fit of giggles at his attitude.

The day had been quiet, picking up each other from school one by one and heading back to Jake’s place. His mom had been out of town for the month on a business trip and it’d become their official club house for the time being, messier than it should’ve been with blankets covering any surface that could serve as a temporary bed.

Heeseung was pushing through the front door with a strange expression on his face, glancing behind in the hallway before locking the deadbolt and peaking out of the peephole. Sweat was coating his face and the other boys stopped laughing as they looked at him.

“It’s that bad out there now?” Jungwon was asking in a soft voice and Heeseung jumped a bit before glancing at him and giving him a solid nod.

News stations had been buzzing for weeks but nobody paid too close of attention outside of the people with particularly raging anxiety. Reports of cannibalisms, first in America and then the neighboring countries.

The boys hadn’t thought much of it, some crazy new drug that would never make it this far or mass hysteria. Then it was announced that it was a disease, something that couldn’t be helped and borders could not stop and things started to get a bit more wary. Some stores were shutting down, families leaving to their summer houses out in the country and yesterday Jay had been cut from work early.

“I don’t know, I don’t think we can wait anymore.” Heeseung was muttering and Jake sat up on the couch, raising an eyebrow in bewilderment.

“You mean like leave? Where would we even go?” He was asking and his question made them all fall silent, knowing he was right and they didn’t have a safe haven to disappear to like others did. They all had families but they weren’t extremely close now that they were older, spending most of their time together and only coming home to get scolded for poor grades.

Heeseung was shaking his head and turning towards them fully to scan the room, freezing up slightly when his head count came up one short. “Where’s Riki?”

“He.. had that exam I think. Must’ve had to stay late.” Sunoo was saying it slowly to try and explain but a feeling of dread settled over everybody at the realization he was out there alone, not yet realizing how quickly things were falling apart.

“Is it really that bad Heeseung?” Jay was asking in confusion, just yesterday they all were walking around casually outside of the few religious nut jobs screaming about the end of days.

Heeseung didn’t say anything for a long time, like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to relay what he had saw or if he just wanted to let them think things were okay for a few minutes longer. He knew he had witnessed stuff that wasn’t going to be fixed anytime soon, stuff that would change how they lived from now on and he wasn’t sure he was ready to fully embrace that.

He was clearing his throat to speak but the words fell short and he made his way over to the kitchen counter instead, taking Jungwon’s moms keys and glancing at him for permission.

The younger boy looked confused but he gave him a small nod, eyes widening a touch when the oldest hesitated before going back into the kitchen and returning with the largest cooking knife available.

“Woah, you can’t go out there with that. You’ll get arrested dude.” Sunghoon was rushing out, suddenly paying attention and alert now as he sat up off the couch and raised his hands towards Heeseung.

“I don’t think there’s anybody left to arrest me.” He was spitting out but he wasn’t angry at his friends, just stricken with fear and anxiety at the thought of returning back outside but he couldn’t stand the idea of Riki being out there alone.

“Well I’ll come with you.” Jay was announcing and standing up, wiping off the chip crumbs from his sweater. Heeseung almost denied him and demanded he stayed here and kept the doors locked but he figured he might not be able to make it alone and Jay was definitely the most capable of the two of them, strong and sturdy despite his carefree personality.

“The rest of you need to stay put. I don’t care what you hear, or how long it takes for us to come back, you can’t open that door.” He was warning the group and they all paused in fearful hesitance before slowly nodding, the idea of not searching for their friends after a period of time leaving them unsettled.

The two eldest were making their way out of the apartment building, stopping at the entry door to push a vending machine in front of it. Jay looked confused when Heeseung asked him to do it but he followed suit anyways, not wanting to deny the orders considering the fear in his friends face.

Jungwon’s moms van was large and loud, rattling when you pressed too hard on the gas pedal and squealing every time it forced its large frame to a stop. They didn’t drive it often, outside of trips to the beach and going through drive thru’s, and Heeseung was grateful that the roads were uncharacteristically empty as he amateurly made his way through the city streets.

It was complete silent as they pulled up to their youngest friends school, both holding their breath as they leaned forward to see out of the driver side window and try to catch sight of any sign of life.

Heeseung’s heart was throbbing and he felt sick, almost too scared to go and find the boy in case he saw something he wasn’t able to ever forget, something he wouldn’t be able to move past. Jay’s hand was reaching forward to take his arm and he glanced at the other boy, seeing him give him a firm nod with a look of determination. Heeseung gave him a weary smile in return but it was the boost of strength he needed to open the door.

There was debris around the area from the days of mild chaos leading up to this and Jay bent down to grab a particularly long piece of metal, steadying it in front of him like a baseball bat as they got closer to the school doors.

They were unlocked and they quickly realized something was wrong judging by the papers scattered along the hallway, backpack’s abandoned in classrooms like they had to evacuate fast and Heeseung could smell something foul that caused his nose to turn up in disgust.

“Riki.” It was a yelled whisper echoing through the halls, carrying the noise all the way down the silent building until it was reaching the end and bouncing back towards them.

“Hyung? Is that you?” A scared voice was coming from the end of the hallway, shaky and muffled like he was hidden behind something and the two older boys let out a sigh of relief at the confirmation that he was at least okay enough to respond.

They were swift in their approach towards the room the voice had come from, forgetting to be cautious because of their relief and rush to get out of there but they quickly froze when a figure was coming out of one of the classrooms in the middle of the hallway.

Heeseung automatically recognized the signs of the creatures he had seen earlier, staring at the man who was staggering into the hall and turning towards them with his nose in the air. His eyes were yellow and vacant and he had dark liquid around his mouth, still moving his jaw like he was finishing a large meal. The man groaned loudly in their direction, bordering on a screech and the boys could do nothing but stare.

“What the fuck?” Jay was rushing out in an anxious tone, glancing over to his friend who was remaining still and watching it carefully. “Dude what’s wrong with him, what the fuck?”

“He’s got it.” Heeseung was stating matter of factly and Jay paled at the realization, shaking his head in disbelief and faltering backwards a few steps.

Heeseung was approaching the creature slowly and they both jumped when it reared its head and roared in agitation, sloppily approaching them and not faltering even when it almost slipped and crashed into the floor. They watched it approached speedily and when it got near they both circled around it’s back, confusing it momentarily but not long enough before it was attacking again.

The creature pinned Heeseung back against the wall, his hands flailing in front of him as he tried his hardest to shove it away with cries and groans of fear. It’s strength was double what a normal man’s would be and he was seconds from giving up when it was slumping to the ground.

Heeseung dropped off the wall and scrambled over to Jay who was panting with the piece of scrap metal in front of him, dripping thick syrupy blood now that he had smashed it into the figure.

They both watched in horror, attempting to catch their breath, as it begun to rise off the floor again. Shakily standing back to its full height and snarling again at them, seemingly angrier now.

“Oh you’ve gotta be shitting me.” Heeseung was panting out as he stared up at its cracked skull, half of its face sliding downwards and a bloodied mess from the force of Jay’s swing mixed with days of decay.

Both boys watched it as it started to approach again and then Jay was letting out a loud scream, taking a few steps forward and swinging the metal back down on its shoulder. They both froze in anticipation and then fear when the creature didn’t react to the hit at all.

“Oh what the fu-“ He was cut off as the creature swung at him and he dove out of the way with a grunt. “How do you kill this thing?”

“Why the fuck would I know?” Heeseung was screaming back in bewilderment, glancing around in confusion to try and find a way out of the situation but coming up with nothing as he turned back to keep his attention on the man who kept getting more and more unhinged the louder they avoided him and his gaping mouth.

The creature wasn’t getting winded whilst the boys were barely managing to swing their arms anymore, using this to its advantage and catching Jay off guard. Heeseung watched in horror as it pinned his friend to the hallway floor, listening to his screams of terror and gasp of air from under its heavy frame.

He didn’t think twice before he was rushing forward, and throwing the entirety of his weight into its body. He let out a guttural scream and pulled his arm back as far as it could go before driving the knife forward into its softened skull. Jay was, thankfully, getting the memo and rolling out of the way before the creature slammed onto the floor, now fully lifeless.

Both boys collapsed to the floor in fits of gasps and pants. Nobody spoke for a few minutes from shock and then Jay’s tired voice was ringing out. “Dude… you just totally saved my life.”

It was silent again for a few seconds before Heeseung was letting out a soft chuckle, launching the other into a fit of delirious laughter until they were both cracking up with the body in between them.

“Holy shit.” Both boys were pausing at the sound of Riki’s voice, a lot closer now as he pushed his way out of the classroom and was watching them from the end of the hallway. “You guys totally killed Mr. Kim.”

“And then what?” Your voice was completely enthralled as you spoke, leaning forward towards the campfire so your elbows were on your knees and you thought you saw Jake’s lips curl up from the corner of your eye.

“Well… we went back to get the others. We tried to get to family but..” Jay was trailing off but you nodded in understanding and he gave you a grateful look before sighing and continuing with his story. “Heeseung found a map in the pocket of a dead guy on the highway out of the city and he had circled the general area that you found us in, so we assumed it was safe.”

“And it was.” Jake was adding and it was some of his first words of the night, having remained mostly silent and to himself throughout your trip.

It had been two days since you left and you knew everybody was feeling unsettled by the fact you were heading back home now to the unknown. It was a mostly uneventful journey, not stopping much or sleeping more than a few hours with a shared determination to get there and back as soon as humanly possible.

You felt like the universe had cut you a break when you arrived to the veterinary hospital Jungwon had seen on the map, only encountering a handful of walkers and finding some medicine that should do the trick fairly quickly. But you knew the universe wasn’t kind nor was she fond of handing out breaks so your stomach clenched with the idea of what could be waiting for you back at the camp.

Sunghoon could’ve died from blood loss and infection and passed along the traumatizing act of putting him down before he turned, or he could’ve turned in the night and taken out a few of his brothers before anybody was awake enough to put a stop to it.

You knew the two boys with you were thinking similar things so you’d ask for a story to try and keep their minds off of it, listening to Jay carefully as he recounted the first time they’d killed a walker and how happy Riki was that it was his mean teacher that often stuck him in detention.

“Heeseung was our leader before he was ever our leader.” Jay was remarking as he finished his story, scooting down more into the dirt so his back was fully pressed against the rotted log he was resting on.

Jake hummed in agreement and you didn’t say anything, thinking about the statement and the conversation you’d had with the eldest boy about the weight of his responsibilities. You felt a longing for him suddenly, missing him and the others more than you thought you would and you could tell the two with you were thinking the same thing now that it was falling silent again.

You didn’t say anything as you were standing up to stomp out the fire, knowing it was already a risk to strike it up in the first place but especially to sleep with it roaring.

The three of you followed the same routine as the past two nights, stringing up cans in a circle around where you were sleeping so if anything, dead or alive, bumped into it you’d have some form of warning before it was coming down directly on top of you. You laid your head down in the pile of leaves and tried to ignore the sticks sitting uncomfortably under your shoulder blades, falling asleep to the sounds of the forest and the two boys breathing.

——

You’d been walking for a few hours before seeing anything familiar but your body was alert to the fact you were getting closer to the camp again, this time with a backpack full of supplies and a prayer in the back of your mind that things would be okay.

It didn’t take long for you to realize something was off about your surroundings, the woods unusually silent and resting like all the animals and trees were holding their breath. You raised your hand and folded it, a silent signal for the boys to stop walking and fall into a crouched position behind you.

Your eyes were hurriedly scanning over the forest floor and your heart sank when you noticed multiple pairs of tracks and footprints that wouldn’t have been from your group, having no reason to venture this far out. You waved Jake and Jay closer and they quickly shifted forward in their crouched position.

“Is it a hoard?” Jake was whispering to you when you pointed out the shoe prints in the mud, glancing at you with a worried expression. Jay’s eyes were dark with concern and his face was hard, glancing in the direction of the others and frowning.

“I don’t think so.” You were shaking your head and sighing softly as you trailed your finger around the indented mud to explain to them. “The steps are too direct and pointed, if it was walkers they’d be messy and all over the place.”

“So it’s people then.” Jay was saying matter of factly and you all feel into a heavy silence, knowing you had no choice but to continue on the path back home, regardless if there was anybody left waiting for you or not.

You didn’t bother wasting anytime, falling into fast and silent footsteps and you maneuvered your way through the woods, guns drawn and knives out of your holster in case any of the people were still around and surveilling the surrounding woods.

Jay caught sight of something long before you did and you were grateful for his hand that shot out to stop you from rushing right into the view of the man you could now see, pacing back and forth in the center of the little houses and keeping an eye out for anything out of place.

You lip curled up in a sneer but you weren’t exactly sure what to do. If it was up to you, you’d simply take him out from a distance but you didn’t know how many were inside with the boys and if any more were not here, not wanting to risk the safety of the others or the three of you by acting on impulse. Jake seemed to be thinking something similar considering he was tapping your shoulder to get your attention, indicating down to your knives after you looked at him.

You understood what he was implying but you stared at him for a few seconds to make sure he was certain, realizing you hadn’t yet discussed the groups morals when it came to the living.

His eyes were hard as he gave you a solid nod and he mouthed for Jay to have your back as you moved in silent towards the patrol. The man didn’t have time to react before you were behind him, listening to the sound of Jay whistle and bring his attention forward before you were wrapping your hand around his forehead and tilting his head back so his neck was fully exposed to you.

He let out a gurgled shout as you slid your knife across his throat, grunting softly under his weight as you tried to lower him to the ground as silently as possible.

You looked up at Jay after he was on the ground, watching him carefully as he gave you a small nod of acceptance and you sighed softly before returning it to him and waiting for Jake to come out of the woods and meet you. The three of you ducked against one of the houses, your backs pressed against the wood as you listened to try and get a guess of how many people were inside.

“I say we just kill him already.” It was a woman’s voice and she was speaking in a nasty rasp like she was a heavy smoker, your heart pounding at the sentence she spoke. “He’s half dead already, I’ll be pissed if he turns on us and takes a chunk out of my arm.”

You glanced at Jake after she was done speaking and he was already looking at you, both of you relieved to hear that she was talking about Sunghoon still being alive, immediately followed by the dread of what she was implying they should do.

“Touch him and you’ll have bigger problems than him turning.” Heeseung’s voice was speaking now and it was dropped to an octave you’d never heard it in before, cold and serious and he threatened her in a deadly tone.

You heard an annoyed scoff from a male voice before it was followed by the sound of low groans of pain that you made out to be Sunghoon’s, wincing slightly at the hurt in his cries.

“Do something then.” The males voice was speaking in a teasing manner and you heard Sunghoon groan again, likely being hit or kicked by somebody inside to prove a point towards the other boys helplessness. “Oh.. you can’t, that’s right. I forgot.”

There was more sounds after that but you couldn’t fully tell what they were, feeling sick and helpless where you were sitting until Jay was snapping his fingers and getting both of your attention back on him.

He was making signals with his hand and you swiftly understood that he was implying he wanted to rush inside and take them out before they had a chance to react or take any hostages, using the element of surprise to your advantage. Jake seemed more hesitant in the idea although you figured it was only the two of them inside the small house, seeing the car they had arrived it and doubting it could fit more than four people.

Your eyes wandered over to the body on the ground and you steadied your footing in the dirt before nodding softly to Jay and patting Jake on the back.

It went extremely fast, your mind on complete autopilot and devoid of any extreme emotion to help you get through the terrible act without hesitating or missing your shot. Jake was kicking the door open roughly and then stepping back to allow you and Jay to rush forward, relief rushing through you at the confirmation it was only two people and then followed by horror considering how easily you were able to sink your knife into the skull of the woman.

She’d barely had a second to process your arrival, eyes widening in fear and letting out a painful gasp of shock before her face was lifeless and she was crumbling to the floor.

You felt slightly sick that it had been so easy for you to kill two people in the span of minutes but you glanced up at the scared boys huddled around the house and you realized that you didn’t regret it, that you’d do it 100 times again if it was necessary.

Heeseung was tied to the radiator next to Sunghoon, clarifying the reason he hadn’t even able to stop their assault on the boy and you glanced at him to see him far paler and more lifeless than he had been when you’d seen him. He was still alive however and you were rushing to grab the supplies from your bag when you noticed the horror on the boys faces, eyes over your shoulder.

You froze up but before you could turn to see what they were seeing, a shot was ringing out close to your ear and you were completely disoriented for a few seconds.

It took awhile to process what had happened, turning your body in a panic to see a fourth man laying in the doorway of the house. His knife was still rattling against the floor from where he’d dropped it and you saw the exit wound coming out from the backside of his head. You spun back around and your heart crumbled when you saw who it was that had killed the man, saving your life by taking another’s.

Riki was holding the gun in shaky hands, barely able to keep it steady and his eyes were wide in shock and horror, keeping it pointed in your direction despite the threat being gone now.

“Riki.” You were saying softly, still frozen but raising your hands in surrender and taking a small step towards him. You didn’t necessarily think he would hurt you but he clearly wasn’t thinking straight and his fingers were still dangerously tight around the trigger. “Riki, it’s okay. You got him, he’s dead.”

His eyes shot to yours at the words and his face softened slightly, letting you approach and take the gun from his rigid hands.

He was dropping his shoulders in relief once the metal was out of his hands, shocking you by pulling you in for a tight hug that knocked the air out of your lungs. You returned it after a few seconds, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and squeezing him tightly with your eyes shut. You could hear the others moving around, untying Heeseung and greeting the others.

After Riki let you go and went to sit down in the corner and calm down, you quickly administered the medication into Sunghoon’s veins and sighed softly at the heavy breath he took at the feeling of it entering his system. You pushed his damp hair off his sweaty forehead and smiled softly at him even though he couldn’t see it, happy he had managed to fight for this long.

You were standing up again and immediately bumping into another frame, pausing until you realized it was Heeseung.

His hands were coming up to cup your face and you smiled at him in relief despite the cuts on his face and the noticeable black eye that you imagined had come from the struggle with the looters that had led to him being the only one tied up. “You gave them hell didn’t you.”

He laughed softly at your words and nodded his head, eyes gentle as he looked down at you and you felt your heart clench uncomfortably at both his expression and how much you had missed him.

You thought this about them all as the night continued on, telling them how your run had gone and listening to them laugh and tell funny stories that you didn’t fully understand but you still felt a lightness in your heart just from how excited they sounded about remembering the smallest details of things that had happened to them together in the old world.

Riki was still a but subdued after what had happened, not speaking much and staying in the corner as you all ate dinner and took sips from the liquor bottle the three of you had found on the trip. He seemed a bit out of it and your heart felt heavy after Jungwon had leaned in to whisper and explain to you that he had never killed somebody before.

You felt guilty that he had done something like that to save you, your own mistake for not assuming there was another person still outside or checking the tracks more carefully because you were too worried about them and too focus on getting inside as soon as possible. Your care was making you stupid and making you weak, leaving the youngest to lose a piece of himself to fix your mistake.

It was this that made up your mind for you, solidifying that you couldn’t stay here with them any longer or else things like this would keep happening. You’d have to continue to risk yourself for them and vice versa, you couldn’t take watching them hurt themselves in the name of saving you or each other and you knew now that they were always going to put the others and you over themselves individually.

You kept reminding yourself this as you silently packed your bag, waiting for the others to fall asleep and leave you on watch duty before you were preparing to slip out.

You’d stay in the woods outside the camp for the night and make sure nothing hurt them during your watch cycle and then you were going to disappear into the dark cover of the trees once the next person on the rotation woke up and found you missing. You left them all of the medication and food, taking nothing but your change of clothes and your knives.

The crickets were extra loud as you made your way outside, having carefully stepped over the sleeping boys and left a note with detailed instructions on which medications to give to Sunghoon and when. You included a small goodbye sentence just so they knew you hadn’t been taken and didn’t get hurt trying to find you, although you had a feeling they’d try anyways.

You were barely off the porch, your foot hitting the dirt softly and feeling the cold chill of the night when a voice behind you was causing you to jump and spin around.

“So that’s it then?” You whipped around with wide eyes but your face crumbled when you realized who it was, seeing Heeseung come out of the shadows with a hurt expression and hooded eyes. “You’re not even going to say goodbye?”

You froze as you looked at him, words falling short as your mouth open and closed in silence. He scoffed as he looked at you, turning his head away as his eyes teared up slightly but he shook his head in anger before taking a few steps in your direction with a raised accusatory finger.

“You’re just going to leave after all this?” He was spitting out at you and the tone of his voice, the disgust lacing his words, made your heart drop into your stomach with a crushing weight.

“I have to.” You replied back with desperation, your face curling up in anguish and you tried to get him to understand even slightly what your reasoning was. “Sunghoon almost died Heeseung, and Riki he… these things will keep happening.”

“He didn’t die.” He was almost yelling now and you flinched back at the volume of his voice, having half a mind to shush him softly and watching the way his face curled up in anger at the sound slipping through your lips. “He didn’t die Y/N, and you were the one who made sure of that. You care about us, I know you do.”

You didn’t know how to reply to that, not wanting to correct him especially when he wasn’t wrong.

You did care about them and it was making your skin crawl every time you found yourself smiling affectionately at one of their offhanded jokes or paying extra attention to their wounds and bruises. Even more so with the boy in front of you with the gentle way he touched you to make sure you weren’t injured, when his face was lit up by campfires or his determination to lead a group of boys through a world he himself didn’t understand.

“I can’t watch it happen.” Your voice was breaking and your shoulders sagged in upset, exhaustion wracking through you both emotionally and physically. “And it always happens, Hee.”

“It won’t happen this time.” He was taking more steps towards you and his hands were shakily coming up to hold your face, staring down at you with his own sense of determination to try and help you see his side of things. “Why didn’t you say bye to me?”

He was asking but you knew he already knew your answer and you tried to pull out of his touch to avoid answering, stopping when his thumb was gently rubbing your cheek and shaking his head to try and stop you.

“Because you wouldn’t be able to leave.” He was answering for you, filling in the blank and giving you a soft sad smile that made you break into a sob, your first time allowing yourself to cry for as long as you could remember. “Right? Tell me I’m right.”

You didn’t say anything but you didn’t need to, feeling him pull you in tightly against his chest as you fully let yourself feel the wave of your emotions, restricting them for so long in the name of survival and fighting to make it through the day.

Heeseung was keeping you in his embrace even when your legs were giving out and you were sinking to the floor in his arms, your hands hitting the dirt and feeling it mold between your fingers. You hooked your head over his shoulder and shut your eyes tight when your gaze fell on the body of the man you’d killed so easily earlier.

You let him hold you like that until your sobs were slowing down and the blood was drying in the grass.

You stayed like that far longer than you’d realized, sitting still and frozen until your cries slowed down and his blood had fully dried in the grass.

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