The feeling of getting paid fucking rocks. You’re low on money. Paycheck to paycheck. You’re about to go on a trip of a lifetime and waste all that shit. You think you’ve earned maybe $400 total. Then, in a blink of the eye. You’re earning $1000 in eight weeks. A GODSEND.
THE WEEK JUST STARTED HOWL
oh cool crying in the car after therapy is gonna be like a regular thing
so i cut the first few scenes in lake’s edge and now matt’s first line is: “It’s on backwards by the way.”
to which connor has his first line of: “What? How can you even tell?”
and tbh i think that sums up their personalities pretty well
heh, yeah im an adult. i threw a wad of wet paper towels at a spider today
My favourite part of the day is deciding if im going to let myself eat or just starve because i wasnt good enough
Lol I’m so lonely
I just low key want to disappear into fiction and die there
What’s the point of having friends if they’re either gonna leave or just start talking shit one you
I know I’m an emotion person and I have a really severe anxiety disorder and my mental illness makes me not a normal person
Idk maybe I come off as normal and then when the mental illness flares up they think I’m just acting weird… like they don’t realize that this happens all the time like even when they’re not around.. I don’t think I explained that well but mental illness is confusing.
It’s been a challenge my whole life to interact with people normally and just be a nerotypical person, and I’ve gotten so much better in the last few years and yet I just still seem to be so alone
I don’t have anyone I can rant to about this so I’m just gonna post it here and hope someone will understand
Cause I’m just so lonely all the time I only have two good friends and one lives in another state and it’s hard to be in contact with her.
I know I’m a difficult person I try to be less difficult but I just can’t be perfect all the time. Maybe that’s why people don’t want to be my friend idk I just hate myself so much and I have worked so hard and been to therapy to try to get rid of it but it’s back now and idk what to do
I don’t feel like fighting it anymore I’m just so tired and so alone god why do I exist please just let me disappear.
Hoe don’t do it
I got my first attack in art fight I’m so excited!!!!
Brian had texted Tim about an hour ago, asking if it was okay for him to come to Tim’s dorm room to hang out. Tim said it was because he wasn’t working on anything important (music theory homework could always be put off for later), and now Brian was here and seemed even more smiley and excited than usual, which Tim didn’t even know was possible.
Tim waved back as Brian sat down next to Tim on the bed. Brian had one of his hands behind his back, away from Tim, and Tim was looking warily at him.
“Don’t be worried, I just made you something and I don’t want you to see it yet.”
Tim’s voice cracked as his expression changed into one of surprise.
“You… made me something?”
“Yeah! I was at the library with Alex and- You remember Alex, right? And Jay? The film majors, you’ve met them a couple times.”
“Yeah, I remember them.”
“Alright, cool, ‘cause Alex is making a film for a class and I want to audition for it.”
“Weren’t you going to see your family or something?”
“Well I was going to, but my siblings are gonna be there so I don’t wanna anymore. And this is for a friend and it’s nice! Aaand I don’t wanna force you to do anything, but maaybe you could with me? We can go to Applebees and talk it over if you want!”
Tim took a moment to process everything Brian said.
“You want me to… act for something? That people will see? I’d rather die. I’ll take the Applebees though: shit food is better than no food.”
Brian’s eyes widened at that, his voice quieting.
“Have you eaten yet today?”
Tim looked away, Brian’s sigh of concern almost making him flinch.
“Tim, you have to take care of yourself.”
“I know Bri, I just forget…”
There was an awkward silence between them that seemed to last forever before Brian piped up again, his tone brightened.
“Do you wanna see what I made you?”
Tim looked back over and nodded. Brian brought his hand up from behind his back, a circular pin resting in his palm. The pin’s design was a picture of a red electric guitar with little pink, hand drawn hearts all around it.
“The library has a pin maker now and I got really excited and made a bunch of ‘em and I made this one for you! I hope you like it! I tried to make it extra special!”
Tim paused for a moment before taking the pin in his hands gingerly, as if it would break any moment. He pinned it to the black shirt underneath his tan jacket carefully before looking back up at Brian. He wrung his hands together as he spoke.
“Can I… hug you?”
Brian’s eyes sparkled as he nodded. And Tim hugged him, resting his head on Brian’s shoulder, his hands tightly gripping the fabric of Brian’s pink, space-themed hoodie. Brian hugged back, his arms around Tim’s shoulders, and they stayed like that for a short while.
“Thank you,” Tim said softly. It was something genuine, and Brian smiled even though Tim couldn’t see it.
“You’re welcome, Tim.”
that sounds like so much work
I think I’m gonna go to sauna and elevate my leg and let it thoroughly heat up in the steam, my ancestors used sauna for healing so let’s see if they knew their shit 😂
according to ava max, nct 127 = mark and taeyong
y'all, the hair i get while I’m on vacation makes me hottest I’m ever gonna look? like once a year I Peak when the nutrients from the lake water heal my skin and nourish my hair and I breathe the Clearest Fucking Air and it’s like?? y'all i wish I looked like this all the time
i decided to shade the comics…so theyre taking a little longer
It’s crazy that the hiring process at a hospital is like 3 full weeks.
But anyway, I definitely get to start my new job on monday (well, orientation anyway)
if taylor is at gma i will in fact have a full mental breakdown over the fact that i’m in new york and not there
i don’t know how he weighs 55lbs 🙃
hey thank you💛
hhhhhhhhhhhhhh i don’t like how terrifying the monsters are in the new trailer
Guess who’s relapsing!!