#the fact that she's voiced by Tara Strong is even better

[madwomansapologist]

my love mine all mine

Meet Kind!Druid!Tav | More Weirdos | AO3

synopsis: It doesn't matter what their first impressions of you were, they certainly did not expect you to be so important in their lifes. And as the days passes, each one of your companions need to understand a simple fact: they love you. They all love you.

warnings: a sequel to that (you don't need to read if you don't want to). song "my love mine all mine" by mitsky for gale. song "class of 2013" by mitsky for karlach. companions (gale, karlach) x druid!tav. background cast (mystra, halsin, lae'zel, shadowheart, selune, astarion, wyll). this game really is about faith and bodily autonomy. hurt/comfort. falling in love.

There is something endless about suffering. Once you felt hunger, nothing can complete that empty spot inside your soul. No amount of hope can ever make you forget about how painful it was to be helplessness. The sun is warm, but not enough to melt winter away from memory.

No brave adult can forget what felt to be a trembling child facing harshness all alone. It would be so much easier to forget how cruel the world was, but all you do is wonder to yourself: why didn't no one helped me? Why didn't no one saved me?

Even the word survivor feels wrong. It implies that something cruel happened in the wild, far away from home. A survivor has a tale to share with pride, scars to proof how strong you became. But sometimes suffering is just suffering, and the wild is your home.

It doesn't end. The suffering doesn't end, even after it does. It haunts you, laughs as you fumble, stains the good moments with sin.

But not with you.

For every time life was painful, you are caring. For everytime it burned and ached, you are gentle. There is something soft about you. No edges to get cut, no harm to be done. You care without shame, and your delicacy is welcome.

It's been long since someone cared for Gale Dekarios. Not for Gale of Waterdeep, the prodigy able to compose the Weave as he so desired, Mystra's lover and worshiper. But for Gale Dekarios, a man and nothing more than that, it's been so long.

Gale's value is his capability to bend the Weave. No one helped him for a reason other that. No one cared, or loved him for something that wasn't his talent or competence.

He was alone, except by Tara, and he got used to it. It's easy to get used to bad things when you think that you deserves them. It's no surprise that he so easily got used to being a dead man walking.

It was fine. Fine that his goddess wouldn't save him, that she would cast him away. Gale took it on himself, he knows that. Sometimes people don't get salvation. Sometimes they don't get a second chance. Sometimes things just end.

But you helped him. You held his hand and pulled him out of stone, unaware that you were actually pulling Gale towards you. You didn't asked for a payment or answers. You just held him.

And Gale held you back.

The world trembled. Poisoned mace. His defenses were already low when the goblin attacked. He knew his party won, but he can't remember how. His conscience was barely a whisper, as uneasy and skittish.

His feet were moving, he could feel it, but Gale wasn't controling them. Darkness devoured him, and the world was reduced to a cold freeze against his face.

"Karlach, you got the first watch," a distorted voice startled him. He wasn't alone. It took Gale a second to understand who was talking. "Halsin, Lae'zel broke her wrist. Shadowheart, follow me."

Gale is half asleep, half dead, but he could recognize that voice anyway. Always demanding, aware of what to do, being right. You. Sweet, caring, loving you.

"Alright, soldier!" Karlach dropped her dripping wet backpack near the fire. Something bumped on his shoulders, and a cry left Gale's lips. "And you get better, mage. I'm counting on you for that!"

Her hand. It was her hand that almost made him collapse. But Gale didn't. That was when he noticed his eyes were closed, and someone was holding him.

Your hands gripping his waist as you tried to walk, your warmth reaching him. He could see a drop of sweat making its way on your neck. Blood staining you silver armor. You smell like... you. He can't describe it in any other way.

"You'll be fine," you whispered. As if you knew his head was about to explode. "We'll take care of you. Close your eyes."

You asked. Gale obeyed.

When he woke up, a black sea stained his vision. He breathed in and out, and understood it was the night sky. Gale stared at the moon, shining down on him, and for a second he though it was staring back.

Gale tried to pray. Would Selune embrace him? If he kneeled and promised his loyalty, would she protect his soul? Gale tried to pray, but no words made to his mind.

When he opened his eyes, you were there. Kneeled beside his bed, so close he could hear you breathing, but looking away. Bright eyes, reflecting the moon, looking down at something. Furrowed brows, lips tense, your shoulder stiff as you moved.

Gale heard the water before he saw the cloth you dipped into it. You agile hands folded it carefully, and placed it on his belly. It was hot. Almost too hot, but you were quick. You pressed it against his skin, and went back to dip it. The white cloth was now stained red.

Oh. You were cleaning him. His eyes noticed the bucket filled with redish fabrics. Gale wondered if cleaning him felt like rubbing wine stains into rugs. If by trying to make it right, you only made it worse. He wouldn't care if you made him worse, not as long as you keep on touching him.

When he reached for your cheeks, Gale didn't even thought about it. He just wanted to touch you, to make sure that you were real.

It startled you, a little gasp escaping your throat. You looked at Gale, analyzing every inch of his face.

For a time, Gale could only look at his hand against your skin. His thumb stroking your cheek, so soft beneath his touch.

"Why are..." that voice wasn't his. It wasn't anything like his. For how long did he slept? "Why are you here?"

You looked at the hand you placed on his waist, and realized how it must be to wake up with someone else touching you. "I was just cleani..."

"That's not what I asked," the mage stopped you. You went back to look at him, and Gale felt your gaze softening his entire being. "Why are you here?"

"I worry about you," you admited. "Specially when you forget what shields are made for."

"Why are you like this?" Gale found himself trying to make whatever was on his mind understandable. That doesn't happen very often. For him to be unsure about his words. "Why do you keep on taking care of me? You don't owe me anything."

"Because you are... you," you went back to cleaning his skin. Gale didn't move his hand, and you didn't seen to mind. "Close your eyes, go back to sleep. You won't even notice I'm here."

With his hand on your cheek, eyes staring at the moon, Gale hoped Selune was staring back.

He don't know what will happen to him after his death. Mystra didn't forgave him, so Gale isn't counting on her protection when his soul is to be judged. But one thing Gale knows: the moon was here before him, and will remain after.

So he prayed. Silently, he begged Selune to protect you. He begged for her to shine on you, the only one who ever made him feel worth something. One day he must die, sooner than later apparently, so he hopes she'll protect you when he's gone.

"Impossible," Gale stroked your jaw. "Utterly impossible."

Every single one of your companions love how sincerely you care for them, but they all see how it can be a problem too. How many times have they told you to not be so welcoming? It makes you you, but it's also the reason why you bleed so often.

How many times have you tried to help someone just to discover they didn't deserve it? How many times will it happens until you finally understand your lesson?

Fainting after a encounter with a ruthless dwarf, Shadowheart thinks it's the best moment to ask you to tone it down, only to be reminded about how you still befriended Astarion even after his introduction. If Wyll explains there is no way you can win this fight, that it isn't even yours, you point at Halsin and he can do nothing but to shut up. And whenever Astarion is a pain in the ass, you explain that mercy and kindness are what brought Karlach to the party.

They are scared for you. No one knows how much pain your heart can take before if finally stops healing. You're kind, and they want you to stay that way, but not if it diminishes your soul. There must be a limit for your hope, and they aren't interest on finding it.

Worried about you hurting yourself, they didn't noticed how that hurted Karlach too.

Few can say they escaped from hell, and even fewer would be stupid enough to not enjoy a second chance. Karlach knows she sounds too distracted at the worst times, too excited when there's nothing to celebrate, but how couldn't she? She won't waste her chance.

If only she could be touched. If she could hug her friends, be near those she loves without hurting them, hold without bruising. If only she could touch you without boiling your precious skin.

Don't matter how affectionate you are, there are thing you just can't do. You showed her only your best sides, so welcoming and caring. After a fight, you rush to check on her. Late at night, you tell stories about your life. When it's peaceful, you show her different ways to tie a know. But you can't touch her.

Karlach thinks you look warm. Not cold. Nothing like distance or indifference. And not hot. Nothing like the infernal machinery inside her chest. You seem peaceful. Calm, in a way that she might never fully comprehend.

You hold Lae'zel's hands to stop her from offending someone. And don't flinch when Astarion pulls you by your waist. It's been some weeks since started to teach Shadowheart how to swim. And Wyll tried to help you with your dance moves. Halsin's hand seem to be glued to your shoulder.

She envies them. Karlach envies everyone that you touch. She just feels so lonely, and she'd already spent too much time pretending not to be. Avernus is behind her, and the person she was there won't ever see daylight again. Karlach is free, and she'll be always true to herself.

Poking the flaming wood with a sticky, trying to make it spread to the others, she was to focused to noticed when you sat beside her by the log. Her mind was somewhere far, far away.

After a few moments, Karlach saw you. She kept herself quiet, just enjoying your presence. As if her silence would make you not want to leave. As if her silence would be enough so she could lay her head at your lap, feel your fingertips undoing the knots on her hair, without burning you in and out.

As she stared at the soon-to-be bonfire, you glared at the sky. You searched on your pockets, looking for a coin, but all you found was a forgotten jasper. It'll do the trick. "Jasper for your thoughts, Mama K?"

Karlach looked at you. "What, soldier?"

"You're quiet today," you said. "Too quiet. Let me help you. If you want to talk, I want to hear. If you want to kick some butts, my boots are ready. So, jasper for your thoughts?"

She opened her hands, and you dropped the crystal on it. Karlach played with it for a second, amused by your words. "I'm tired," she said. "Of not touching. Or being touched. I know I'm not alone but... sometimes I can't help but to feel like that. Even Mama K has her moments."

She has so much love to give. Just like you. If only she could give it as freely as you do. Karlach respects you for it. For trying to be better, don't matter how much it hurts you. Scars are signs of bravery, just as pieces of broken hearts.

You think it's worth the cost, and so does Karlach.

"One day," you breathed in. Looking at the fire, you saw why Karlach was so interest on it. Don't matter how much you learn, it still looks magic. "I will braid your hair. Massage your shoulders. Wash your back. Teach you archery, my chest against you back and my hand holding yours. Take the eyelash that fell on your cheeks. Straighten your necklace. I will let lips do what hands do."

You turned to her, with a beaming smile on your face and wet eyes. "But for now, can you wait? Can you dream for a few months more, until we find a solution? Because I swear, Karlach, I will find one. Don't matter if I'll need to walk throught the Nine Hells. I will find a cure for you."

"Damn, soldier," Karlach hissed. Maybe it was the light, but her eyes were redish. You did the noble thing and pretend to not have seen the tears. "You really are the sweetest hero around."

"So don't think you're alone anymore!" You suppressed the urge to punch her arm. Scratch brought you a red ball, and you caressed him. "I'm here. We all are."

And that's one thing they all will be forced to understand: they are not alone. Not anymore.

Part 3!

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

#madwomansapologist #kind!druid!tav #tavrem #baldur's gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 gale #bg3 x reader #bg3 tav #gale #gale x reader #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #gale x tav #gale bg3 #gale dekarios x reader #gale dekarios x tav #karlach #karlach x reader #karlach x tav #gale of waterdeep x reader #gale of waterdeep x tav #karlach bg3 #bg3 karlach #oc: liliana wilde

[a34trgv2]

The Problem With Exposition Dumps

In any form of entertainment, it's important to establish some context for the events of the story. There is a right way to do it and a wrong way. Dumping exposition onto the audience is most certainly the wrong way. For this post, I'm going to explain my problem with exposition dumps and how to better convey exposition. And in case you're wondering, no, I'm not going to put down writers who use exposition dumps as "lazy" or "pathetic."" My intent is always to educate, not belittle.

You should be familiar with what an exposition dump is as they pop up everywhere. In movies, TV shows, video games, radio podcasts and etc.. Characters will stop the story dead in it's tracks to spend more than a paragraph talking about lore, character backstorys, or the setting they're in. This makes for boring entertainment because at that point the characters are just spouting random tribia from the story bible and not actually telling a compelling story. I'm all about fun facts and interesting lore, but not at the expense of good storytelling and creative world building.

Let's dissect this clip from Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur. Moon Girl says that she's tired, yet the way she's animated in the clip leads me to believe otherwise as she's not panting or sweating. She also mentions that the bad guy is getting stronger, then asks "but how?" I can suspend my disbelief enough to get behind a child prodigy befriending a dinosaur and fighting bad guys in New York, but I don't buy for a second she doesn't know what a troll is. But okay, let's actually assume she doesn't know what a troll is (as unlikely as that sounds); she should still put 2 and 2 together when she sees that everytime she takes his petty comments personally, he gets stronger. She should've known before this particular clip that he was feeding off her negative emotions like a parasite, or in this case, a symbiote. She then zooms in on the troll and realizes that it's a symbiote before spelling out for the audience what a symbiote's weakness is. First of all, even if people didn't know what a symbiote was, you could've still showed us what it's weakness is by having Devil roar immediately. Or better yet, leave it a mystery to be solved in a latter episode because it honestly doesn't matter too much in the context of the episode. Second, you mean to tell me this kid knows what an alien symbiote is but not a troll? This makes her less of a relatable kid who just so happens to be smart and more like a socially inept outcast who's so caught up in scienec and math that she's basically stupid when it comes to being a human. Not only was this exposition dump useless, it was also poorly constructed based on what we already know about Moon Girl and what kind of girl she's supposed to be.

Is there a way to give exposition without it feeling pointless and boring, though? Actually, yes. One of the best examples I can think of is the opening to Samurai Jack. It perfectly sums up the main driving force behind Jack's quest with the late-great Mako's chilling and sinster voice, and eerie flute plaing, and the still images that look like ancient Japanese artwork. The lines used are also vague enough for the audience to fill in the gaps and we're told just enough to be invested in the story. Exposition can also be told in a way that's funny, such as in the Wander Over Yonder episode The Ball, where Beeza nonchalantly explains to Wander and Sylvia that the world is ending (again) at the paws of a giant space puppy. The comedic timing is on point as Tara Strong gives a very relaxed and soft spoken delivery as Beeza mentions cannibalism and starvation as possible fates for her people. Exposition can even be sung in a banging musical number, such as Part Of Your World from Little Mermaid, One Day More from Les Miserable, or the iconic Oompa Loompa songs from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. In the hands of the right storyteller, the exposition scene could be an audience member's favorite moment from the story.

As the saying goes, less is more. This is especially true when you're writing exposition. Dumping exposition on the audience will either frustrate them or bore them to sleep. If you're gonna give exposition during the story, try having it delivered in a way that's interesting; i.e. during an action scene like in Kung Fu Panda, a funny scene like in The Bad Guys, or in a musical number like in The Hunchback of Notre Dame. Just because exposition is necessary doesn't mean it has to be boring. Exposition is the avocado of storytelling. Alone, it's bland and boring as paint drying on a rainy day. With the right ingredients, though, it can make for some pretty good guacamole. See you next time ✌️

#reblog #share #like #follow #animation #comedy #rant #problem #exposition #exposition dumps #samurai jack #moon girl and devil dinosaur #storytelling #boring

[sasquach-scratches]

The best part of the Stitches questline is working with a drunk Alfiq mage.

and have her vomit while casting a spell

#elder scrolls #teso #eso elsweyr #elsweyr spoilers #probably idk #the fact that she's voiced by Tara Strong is even better #it's like a cat version of Toot Braunstein

[prose-for-hire]

Face your demon

Pairing: Spike x reader

Request: Could you do A Spike x reader where the reader is in love with him, but doesn't show her emotions (except for getting easily flustered around him), but Spike overhears hears her talking to willow about it and he confronts her, ending in them being together?

Requested by: @wiccanindigo​

Requested tags: @fictionalhoomanofnowhere @artsymaddie​ @shy-ginger-in-the-graveyard​ @cameo-greaves​

​You were pretty neutral in public. Your face rarely shifted other than to a polite smile or perhaps a confused frown should the moment take you by surprise. Other than this human reaction, you would usually maintain a resting face. One that appeared to most as if you didn’t wish to be in their company. Or anywhere at all really.

You felt a lot. You really cared about your friends, the people you loved. It was just near-impossible to express this. At least, in a way that you were comfortable. It was much easier to hold people at a distance. That way, you didn’t risk rejection. Or painful, bitter emotions that you didn’t enjoy.

So, you tended to hide your emotional side completely. Rather than wrestle with articulating the way you felt. It wasn’t necessarily a conscious decision, just one that you lived with. You struggled expressing your emotions – not only on your face but also verbally. Any way, really. It could be so hard.

Luckily for you though, you had some very caring and empathetic friends. The Scoobies. They understood and gave you the time you needed – between fighting apocalypses of course.

You were sat in the Magic box with all of your friends around you. Buffy, Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara and Giles. You were characteristically just staring into the centre of the room as the usual antics played out around you.

You contributed now and again although not as passionately as the others, it must be said. You tended to bounce off of someone else’s point and repeat it if you agreed with it with a shrug. As if you would rather be anywhere but there.

You weren’t shy. In fact you came across as the complete opposite. Cool, collected. Near apathetic should your friends not understand how deeply you truly did care – you just didn’t express it as much as most. There was no need to gush in your book. You weren’t one to keep your heart on your sleeve and make the entire room look at it.

Well, that was until him.

Spike ran in, slamming the door shut behind him. It slammed so hard the entire store shook and he sauntered in as if it was nothing. It made the corners of your mouth tug into an almost-smile but you looked down to avoid anyone seeing.

There he was, your weakness. The one that could render you speechless. A flustered mess. A heat would rise in your cheeks and your voice would appear weak and just wholly unlike yourself.

You had it bad. He always did this, walking in with that swagger. Those cheekbones. That look…

His eyes were straight on you. As they always were. You were a mystery to him, one he was so desperate to figure out. You had noticed the way he always made his way to you. The way he dropped his voice and made comments about the others in the room in the hopes of you cracking a smile.

You spoke to him as much as you could, but often your words failed you. You didn’t want to give anything away. Couldn’t. You didn’t want him to tease you, reject you in such a painful way.

He was Spike, after all. He could have anyone he wanted you were sure of it.

The point was, though, that he wanted you. And you were too wrapped up in focusing on how to breath properly when he was around that you didn’t notice.

Spike found your resting face beautifully morbid. He found you to be strong-willed and the very little he sensed or heard from you he found himself clinging to. You would be stamped onto his brain for the rest of his un-life, he was sure of it.

He was in so deep. Thought about you constantly. Wanted to know what you were doing, what you were thinking. Imagined himself by your side. Taking you into his bed… oh, and I won’t even start on the dreams. They left him aching. Such deep, unending desire. For you. God, it could only ever be you.

“Alright, pet? Don’t rush to say you missed me, written on your face already” He smouldered in that way he did. Hoping for any kind of reaction.

You looked up at him before immediately looking away. A ghost of a smile on your face as you shifted in your seat. He took this as an invitation to sit beside you and so he did.

“Hi Spike” You just about managed before your voice wavered. You didn’t like the way he rendered you this flustered mess. But, at the same time you couldn’t help but completely love it.

Your usual cool demeanour gone. Lost in those beautiful eyes of his. You could happily live in his eyes for the rest of your life.

You managed to position yourself in your seat in such a way that meant he made up most of you vision, without it looking glaringly obvious to anyone else. He lived in your peripheral vision. At least this way a little part of him was yours.

You became a little brave and moved your eyes to look at him properly, no longer just from the side. He was beautiful. The way that t-shirt clung perfectly to his torso. The way his leather duster managed to land in such a relaxed way on his shoulders. Effortless cool. Or, that’s what you assumed.

You loved him. His looks. His personality. Just everything. You couldn’t escape it.

Something snapped you out of staring. Everyone’s eyes were suddenly on you. Staring.

“Huh?” You asked, feeling a heat rise in your cheeks as he turned to face you properly too. You had apparently managed to miss the entire meeting. Not one scrap of the plan had entered your head. You were consumed by him instead.

“Y/n? You sure that’s okay?”

“We’ll be fine on patrol, right love?” Spike smirked at the rest of the room and raised an eyebrow which made everyone reconsider.

“We can switch if evil dead makes you uncomfortable” Xander offered kindly which made spike glare. He wanted you to himself.

“No that’s good- uh, fine. It’s fine. I’ll patrol with Spike” you rushed out at a completely different pace than anyone was used to hearing you speak.

What you were supposed to be looking for, you didn’t know. You hadn’t been listening just focusing on regulating your breathing. Wiping the sweat from your palms at the proximity. He was sat so close to you. You wanted to just lean against him. Whisper how you felt.

You and Spike walked out into the cool night air. Mostly in silence, although you could almost hear the cogs in his mind whirring to come up with something to say. You didn’t realise but he was trying to impress you. Trying to get you to smile. He loved it when you smiled. Near melted.

He then finally asked something he had so wanted to say to you. For such a long time.

“We could, uh, blow this off, go for a drink?” He let the proposition hang in the air.

You didn’t even begin to consider this had been something more than a teasing joke because he didn’t want to be stuck patrolling anymore. Just wanted to rebel against Buffy’s sudden authority in his life.

“Yeah, because I’ve always thought you’d look great with a redwood through your chest” You spoke, referring to what Buffy would do to him should he leave you or the demon to run through the streets.

“Pet-”

“It’d make a pretty accessory. Bring out your eyes” You deadpanned and he just stared. Why were you like this? Why did your flirting so quickly descend into just being rude?

It was like a disease. You were riddled with it. Any sense that your mouth would spill the contents of your mind and something took over. Possessed you, began to say the very opposite of what you wished to say.

You wanted him to ask you out for a drink. Tell you that you looked nice, that he felt lucky to have someone like you to take out. Have on his arm. Show off. You wanted to loop your arms around him and embrace him. Kiss his lips. Have him in your bed. His body yours and only yours.

But, instead, you had just told him he would look better dead. Or, well, more dead. He had taken this as a firm no, you didn’t want to go out with him. He looked upwards, trying to stop the stinging at the back of his eyes before he nodded firmly and just shrugged.

“Whatever, let’s find this vamp”

Oh, right. It was a vampire. You were supposed to be looking for a vampire. That at least narrowed it down… kind of.

Both of you took turns in glancing at the person beside them. So desperately wishing to touch them. Have some kind of intimacy. It was hard having the one that you loved so close and yet emotionally so far away.

There was a distance. A canyon between you that you both wished to cross. But it was so hard. There would be no turning back.

You never caught up with the vampire you were meant to find and Spike walked you home instead when it got too late. You tried to thank him for the gesture but he had turned and walked away. Licking his wound at the rejection you had inflicted upon him without realising.

Despite the fact you had hurt him though, he had needed to make sure you got in safe. Protecting you from harm meant everything even if you wouldn’t give him the time of day.

It had been a couple of days since this unwitting rejection and you and Willow had arrived early waiting to meet with the others at the Magic Box. Giles had gone to pick up some order sat the back. Which left just you and your friend. Well, that’s what you thought anyway.

She was the only one that knew how you felt for Spike. She had seen you watching him, a new expression unlocked on your face. As if she had won a quest or something in a video game and been allowed to see it.

Conversation had quickly turned to this man that you were so in love with it managed to fluster even you. You near hid your face from your friend at even the implication you liked him. But you were comfortable that Willow was being supportive.

You discussed that you liked him. Truly admitted it out loud for the first time. Not realising that the man himself was stood around the corner listening. He loved to hear your voice and so had stayed back because you seemed to speak less in his company.

Spike’s jaw tensed as he heard you talking about this mystery man though. He had never heard you gush this way before. Stumbling over your words to describe such longing. You usually appeared so calm, collected. He wished to be the one that sent you weak at the knees in the way that this nameless idiot did. He guessed it was probably Xander.

Stupid bloody Xander. Gormless nit.

“Maybe, uh, you should tell him? You can’t know his feelings unless you try” Willow offered.

Spike guiltily hoped that you would have to face rejection so that he could comfort you instead. Spend more time with you, prove to you that you could trust him with your emotions. He so longed to have your attention. Your trust.

“I can’t… I-it’s too hard” You sighed and his spirits lifted, maybe this would be his chance instead. While you tried to build up your courage, he could show you how much you meant to him. How much he wanted you.

Nothing could have prepared him for what came out of your mouth next. There had been only a slight pause while you sifted through your emotions.

“He’s so- he’s… he’s Spike” You had no other description other than this spike-ness was all that you wanted. You near craved it. But also these words explained how hard it was. How trying to speak to him was near impossible. Willow nodded in understanding and patted your shoulder sympathetically.

“It could be good for you, y’know? Facing your, uh, demon…” Willow’s voice dried up. Turned into a little squeak. You looked up, confused.

There he was, as if your longing had been a magnet to the man himself. Your eyes bulged and your mouth opened in shock. The most your face had ever given away.

Willow stumbled over some excuse that neither Spike nor you heard before she left for the exit. Allowing you to both speak.

“I’m the bloke you’ve been harpin’ on about?” He said slowly. He did this only because he wanted to hear it from your mouth again. As if he wasn’t entirely sure if he had dreamed it or not.

“We don’t have to make it into a big deal… I’m sure I’ll, uh, get over it” You tried, avoiding the rejection you could feel coming.

“Don’t” He said quickly, “God, please bloody don’t get over it. You’d break a poor dead man’s heart if you did”

“What?” You asked, frowning in confusion. He couldn’t possibly feel the same way… could he?

“Don’t be daft, love. Asked you for a drink didn’t I? Trailed after you despite you not even pretending to take an interest. Been there just in the nick of time before somethin’ nasty ate you?” He reeled off things he had pretty much done in the last fourty-eight hours. It made you gasp with surprise. How had you missed this? “Tell me I haven’t bent over bloody backwards for even a shred of your affection,”

“Spike…” You looked away, it was so hard. You didn’t even know how to begin to say what you needed to.

“Please, don’t shy away. Can’t stand it when your eyes wander…”

“Spike, I…” He took your hand, nodding subtly to show that he was there. That he liked you, that he needed to hear it. Whatever it may be, “I love you”

Spike pulled you into him immediately, knowing this must have bee hard for you. He was beginning to understand. You were like him, petrified of the rejection. The idea that the one that held such promise and stirred such feeling could ruin everything. You restored his faith in love. Rekindled his affections for the notion as well as confirming that he loved you too.

He crashed his lips to yours, his reply to your words communicated in this way. And you understood completely. Lips moving against yours, a display of affection only for you. he was firm in his love but so very tender. He embraced you close, a hand along the small of your back that made you shiver and lean further into him. Deepening this perfect kiss.

You parted, somewhat reluctantly and just gazed at the other for a moment before he spoke.

“I’m just glad you don’t have eyes for the whelp” Spike grinned and it made your face brighten. A smile. One that he savoured as you rolled your eyes at him being so pleased you liked him more than Xander.

He took your hand in his and sauntered beside you. Chest puffed out and proud to have you by his side. As if you had just gifted him the entire world.

Now you just had to break it to your friends. There was no way you would be hiding this.

#Spike btvs #Spike x reader #Spike imagine #Spike x you #Spike #btvs #btvs x reader #btvs imagine #btvs x you #Buffy The Vampire Slayer #buffy the vampire slayer imagines #spike fic #buffyverse #btvs fic #x reader #gn #gender neutral reader #gender not mentioned

[snelbz]

The Return {The Arrival, Part 2}

Summary: Back at the lake house, ten years later... Collaboration with @tacmc.

Word Count: 6402

The Arrival Series Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

10 years later….

“Every year,” Nesta began, shaking her head as they drove up the long, winding driveway. “Every year, we are the last people here.”

With a roll of his eyes as he put the truck in park, Cassian got out and shut the driver’s side door behind him. Once again, he had the boat, which the others, who had surely arrived hours before, were most likely waiting for.

They needed a getaway.

As of the month before, Cassian had three times the responsibilities at work. Add two teenage boys and a ten year old that thought she was far older than she was, Cassian was exhausted. He knew Nesta was, too, and when she got out of the car to leave the boys to their bickering, Cassian knew she was feeling that exhaustion, deep.

She looked over at him and he gave her a smile, which she immediately returned before opening up the back door and giving her first order of the vacation. “Thorn. John. Bags inside. Now.”

John groaned as Thorn muttered, “I’m eighteen, I shouldn’t even be here.”

Cassian knew Nesta was biting her tongue as she told Scarlett to follow her around back to find Nesta and Elain.

Cassian shot Thorn and John a look that shut them both up as he heard, “Boys giving you a hard time?”

He looked over his shoulder to find his oldest niece, and smiled. “Hey, Lunabug. Where the hell are the rest of your pants?”

Luna looked down at her cutoff shorts before snorting and giving her uncle a hug. “First of all, watch your mouth. Second of all, these were eighty bucks, so be nice.”

Cassian hesitated. “Eighty… Your dad let you spend eighty bucks on a scrap of denim?”

“It’s good to see you, too, Uncle Cass,” Luna said, ignoring the question altogether.

As he unloaded the rest of the bags and hopped back in the truck to pull it around back, Nesta found Feyre and Elain just where she expected to: tanning on the back deck.

“Nice of you to finally show up,” Feyre crooned, raising her sunglasses to look up at her older sister.

The glare Nesta gave to Feyre told her if her daughter wasn’t feet behind her, she’d be giving her a very vulgar gesture.

“Hi, Scarlett,” Elain smiled, ignoring the silent bickering between her sisters. “You ready for a fun weekend?”

“Yes ma’am,” she replied, her manners nearly as impeccable as Luna’s. “Where is Layla?”

“In the bonus room with the twins,” Feyre said, letting her sunglasses drop back into place as she laid down on her chair. “They brought a bunch of makeup, so I’m pretty sure it’s makeover time.”

Scarlett’s eyes were bright as she smiled up at her mother and hurried into the house.

“Where are the boys?” Nesta asked, stealing Feyre’s drink and downing half of it in one large drink.

Feyre snatched it back, with a muttered, “Bitch,” as Elain shook her head and pointed to the dark haired brood on the docks.

“They’ve been swimming while they waited on Uncle Cass to show up with the boat.”

“Not only do I have Thorn and John to deal with, I’ve also got Little Miss Drama Queen herself to get ready and in the truck,” Nesta said, eyeing Feyre’s drink again. “Plus Cassian. But I gave up on wrangling him years ago.”

Elain shook her head as Feyre snorted. “And Thorn is too much a spitting image of Cass, is that the issue?”

Nesta shook her head, plopping down in a lawn chair opposite of them. “Thorn wants his independence, but he also wants me to cook his food, do his laundry, and clean up after him. That’s Thorn’s issue. And John wants to do everything his cool, adult big brother does. Which annoys Thorn.”

“He’s eighteen now,” Elain said, sighing. “Our husbands were no different at that age. Wanting to be men, but too immature to handle themselves.”

“They’re still too immature to handle themselves,” Feyre mumbled, which made them all laugh.

Her sisters - they were exactly what Nesta needed.

They watched as Cassian drove down to the dock and lowered the boat into the water. Bennett and Lannan were there, swimming, and the eldest helped Cassian guide the boat in and tie it up. Lannan helped, too, but being only ten, his judgement wasn’t the most trustworthy.

The sliding door was pushed open and Azriel wandered out, the top of his hair combed back, and sporting a hot pink lipgloss, which he was attempting to wipe off with a tissue. “Shit, this stuff stains.”

Elain arched a brow as she caught sight of her husband. “I kind of like it.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, but there was no denying the small smile that appeared on his lips.

“It’s a good look,” Feyre agreed, to which Azriel rolled his eyes.

“It’s better than the alternative,” he sighed. “They wanted to recreate a look they saw on YouTube, but were devastated when they realized the signal wasn't strong enough to play a full video in HD.”

“What a travesty,” Elain gasped, faking her horror.

“Thorn is going to hate that,” Nesta snickered. “He may not be able to FaceTime his girlfriend.”

“He’ll live,” Cassian announced, jogging up the porch. “Spending three days focused on his family is good. The kid needs it.”

“The kid needs a kick in the ass,” Nesta muttered, and motioned for Cassian to come closer. He did so, climbing onto her chair and nestling himself between her legs. “But I love him, like I love you.”

Cassian hummed and kissed her, softly.

“My god, what do your kids think when you do this at home?” Feyre asked.

“They’re used to it by now, I’m sure,” Azriel mumbled.

“Absolutely,” Cassian mumbled, before kissing his wife, again.

“Party’s here!” Rhysand came around the corner of the house, carrying two cases of beer. He repeated the same thing his wife had said, looking at Cassian and Nesta. “It’s about time you joined us.”

“Blame the kids,” Nesta said, her arms wrapping around Cassian’s broad shoulders.

“Speaking of the kids, tell them to get ready,” Rhysand said, dropping the cases of beer on the porch. “As soon as these are in the fridge, we’re starting up the boat.”

“I don’t want to go on the boat.”

They all spun around to find Thorn, his phone in the air as he tried to find signal. “Can I have the keys to the truck?”

Cassian scoffed. “Hell, no.”

“I have to run into town,” Thorne said, stubbornly.

“You can tell Marion that you’ll call her when you can,” Nesta said, calmly.

“This isn’t about Marion,” Thorn argued - a complete lie, and they all knew it. “We don’t have anything to drink. We just have water, juice boxes, and alcohol. And, unless you want me to break into the beer-.”

“Try and see what happens,” Cassian warned.

Thorn rolled his eyes, and even though he was the spitting image of Cassian, the look was so much like Nesta that Cassian couldn’t help but chuckle.

“I’ll take Luna and Bennett. They’re trustworthy,” Thorn pushed.

Cassian looked at Azriel and Rhysand, who shrugged.

“Fine. Be back in an hour,” he said, and dug the keys out of his pocket before tossing them to his oldest son.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, and went back inside.

“You know we have drinks in the cooler in the garage, right,” Feyre asked, rolling her eyes as Rhys got a warm beer out of the case and popped it open.

“I figured,” Nesta said. “But Thorn would do nothing but complain the whole time on the boat and would, in fact, break into the beer if we left him here. Might as well let him go have a little freedom before dinner.”

“And if he takes Ben and Luna, he’ll be less likely to get into trouble,” Cassian added, even as Rhys and Az gave each other disbelieving looks.

“Luna, yes, but Bennett is as likely to get him into trouble as he is to get him out,” Rhys admitted.

Feyre finished off her drink and said to her sisters, “Why did we procreate with these idiots? It made our kids idiots.” She stood and said, “I need a refill.”

Elain stood and grabbed her empty glass as well. “Speak for yourself, my kids are all honors students and make good choices.”

Cassian groaned as Nesta rolled her eyes. “Yes, your prized children are the exception to our hooligans. Now, I’m going to put on a swimsuit and tell the girls to do the same.”

Cassian watched her as she left.

He, Azriel, and Rhysand threw beer into the cooler as they heard Thorn, Bennett, and Luna speed away in Cassian’s truck.

“They’re going to do something stupid,” Rhysand mumbled.

“Don’t drag Luna into this,” Azriel countered, carrying the cooler down the hill to the boat.

“She’s already been dragged, bud,” Cassian said, clapping a hand on Azriel’s shoulder. “Now we just pray that they return in one piece.”

*

“Where are they?” Elain sighed. “We’re not even going to get on the water before the sun goes down.”

“They were finishing their makeovers,” Feyre said, sipping from a glass of wine by the island. “Lily said they’ll be down soon.”

“Aunt Feyre,” Layla’s little voice called from the top of the stairs. “Can you come here for a minute?”

As one, the sisters looked at each other.

“This can’t be good,” Feyre sighed, taking another drink from her wine glass and heading for the stairs.

Nesta and Elain followed, and they could all hear the frantic, panicked words before they even topped the stairs.

“It wasn’t supposed to look like that! You should have followed the tutorial.”

“I can’t. I couldn’t watch the TikTok to make sure I was doing it right.”

“What happened?” Feyre said, pushing the door open and freezing.

Layla and Scarlett were sitting on the couch against the far wall, caked makeup on both of their faces, but the twins were sitting at the desk, a mirror in front of them. A long strand of Lily’s hair laid on the desk in front of them, and she had a pair of safety scissors in her hands.

“Don’t be mad,” Lily said, locking eyes with Feyre in the mirror.

Crossing her arms and leaning on the door frame, Feyre smirked. “Why would I be mad, it’s not my hair that got chopped.”

True enough, Lily’s hair looked far differently than it had the last time her mother had seen her. A fourth of her head looked like it had received a very dreadful bowl cut, while the rest of her hair remained the same, hanging halfway down her back.

She stared in the mirror in horror as Olive tried her best to style her twin. “I mean, it’s not so…bad.”

“I’m going to start freshman year looking like…” Lily’s hands slowly covered her mouth as she stifled a quiet sob.

“It’s not so bad,” Olive repeated, a little more convincingly. “It just needs…some product…”

“It looks like I took a knife to my bangs!”

“Bangs?” Nesta repeated. “Is that what you were going for?”

“Yeah,” Scarlett said, answering her mother in favor of her cousin. “They told her to on Tik Tok.”

“Oh, Lily,” Elain breathed, trying to hide her quiet laughter.

“This is a disaster!” Lily said, covering her entire face.

Feyre sighed and stepped up behind her daughter, resting her hands on her shoulders. “We’ll go see Aunt Mor and get it fixed when we get home. There’s still some time before school starts for it to grow in, and I’m sure Aunt Mor can work her magic. Okay?”

Lily sniffled and nodded.

“Come on, girls,” Nesta said, holding a hand out for Scarlett and Layla. “Let’s go get ready to go on the boat for a bit before dinner.”

“And you, Lily. We’ll find you a hat to wear,” Feyre said, dropping a kiss to the top of Lily’s head. “You, too, Livy.”

“Olive,” she snapped. “It’s Olive.”

With a heavy sigh, Feyre said, “I’m sorry, you’re right. Olive, my apologies. You girls go get changed and meet us on the dock, please.”

Elain and Nesta headed down the stairs, Feyre on their heels, but they waited until they got onto the back porch before looking at her.

“What was that?” Elain asked, raising an eyebrow as she looked at her.

“That is new,” Feyre sighed. “For whatever reason, we can’t call her anything but Olive. Liv, Livy, she’s not having it. It’s immature.”

“So, if I call her Livy, the name that I’ve called her since birth, she’s going to snap at me?” Nesta asked. “Yeah, I’m not going to call her Olive. It’s weird.”

“Well, it is the name on her birth certificate,” Feyre said, laughing.

Nesta shrugged. “Details.”

Elain agreed that it was weird, and they were still talking about it as Scarlett and Layla ran onto the deck, ready in their swimsuits, then down to the docks where their dads and Lannan were waiting. The twins were close behind, Olive still moody and Lily covering her hair with a hat.

When Rhysand questioned why she was wearing a beanie with a swimsuit on a boat, they all told him to mind his own business.

“Where is Luna?” Lannan asked, looking towards the house, as if his big sister might appear out of nowhere.

“She went with Thorn and Bennett into town. They aren’t coming on the boat, but they’ll be home before dinner,” Elain promised, which earned a pout from Lannan. Even though they were years apart, the two were still extremely close and it warmed Elain’s heart.

After an hour or so on the boat, the sun had begun its slow descent, and they headed back in.

“Everyone go get washed up while we make dinner,” Rhys announced. With a smirk, he added, “No impromptu haircuts.”

Lily’s beanie had fallen off during one of their faster rides and Rhysand tried not to laugh.

He really did.

He did not succeed.

“Dad!” She cried, hurrying up the deck stairs and rushing towards the house. “It’s not funny!”

As soon as she was in the house, he muttered to Azriel, “It’s pretty damn funny.”

Elain went into the house to start the food, but came back out a few minutes later. “The kids aren’t back yet. They were supposed to be back by now.”

“I’ll try calling Bennett,” Rhys said, heading into the house and going to their room. A few minutes later, he joined them in the kitchen. “No answer. Have y’all heard from them?”

“No,” Elain said, shaking her head. She looked at Azriel, concern written on her face. “And it’s not like Luna to go so long without checking in.”

Azriel frowned. “I’m sure they’re fine, Lainy. I’m sure they’re just being teenagers.”

Even he didn’t believe himself.

Cassian swore. “I’m sure Thorn was leading the way. He’s-.”

They could hear a car pulling into the driveway, and all six adults turned their heads toward the sliding door, waiting.

Luna and Bennett appeared a moment later, looking sheepish and refusing to make eye contact with any of them.

“Luna,” Azriel began, starting with the one that was most likely to talk. “Where’ve you been?”

“In town,” she answered, without missing a beat.

Nesta was looking around. “Where’s Thorn?”

Neither of them answered.

Cassian crossed his arms, and repeated, “Where’s Thorn?”

Bennett was rubbing the back of his neck when he muttered, “Jail.”

Everyone froze. It was Nesta who said, “I’m sorry, what?”

“Thorn got arrested,” Luna whispered, staring at her feet.

“He— What do you—?” Nesta was shaking her head, clearly not processing what they were telling her.

“Luna, Ben, follow me,” Rhys said, pointing to the back hallway where the adults’ bedrooms were situated. He looked at Feyre. “Think y’all can start on dinner while we handle this?”

She nodded, but was moving towards Nesta, who looked like she was about to pass out. “Go. We’ve got this under control.”

Cassian looked inclined to disagree, but Rhys walked down the hall, Luna and Bennett a step behind, and he and Azriel followed. They sat down on the end of the bed and faced their fathers and uncle as Rhysand shut the door.

“What happened?”

Luna looked like she was going to be sick under the disapproving gaze of her father. “We got drinks and were hanging out in the park by the Square. There weren’t any kids around so we were just messing around on the swing set. And then Rion got there and—.”

“Marion?” Cassian interrupted. “Thorn’s girlfriend showed up?”

They both nodded and glanced at each other. “I guess she was planning to come up the whole time.”

“The drinks are in the bed of the truck,” Bennett interjected, clearing his throat.

“Ben, in the kindest way, I don’t give a damn about the drinks right now,” Rhys sighed. “What happened that was illegal? Why is Thorn in jail?”

“They went back to the truck,” Luna said, quietly. “We stayed on the playground and we figured we’d just leave when they were done.”

The men silently stared at them.

It was Azriel who awkwardly asked, “And when you say they went back to the truck…?”

“They were having sex,” Bennett replied, bluntly, while Luna’s cheeks were on fire.

“In my truck?” Cassian asked, outraged.

Again, they both nodded. Luna went on. “We noticed it was getting a little late and started heading back that way and when we got closer, we saw the cop putting them in handcuffs.”

“The cop at least let us take the keys, so we could bring the truck back,” Bennett shrugged. “I guess he let Rion off, cause he only put Thorn in the back of the cop car.”

“Are we in trouble?” Luna asked, her wide, hazel eyes filling with tears.

Rhys and Azriel looked at each other and sighed. “No,” Azriel said, at least. “But you should have called us immediately when something went wrong.”

“My phone was dead,” she defended, pulling it out and showing them.

Bennett looked at Rhys. “And you know I never have signal out here.”

Rhys nodded and sighed. “Go get cleaned up for dinner. Don’t tell your brothers and sisters about this. We need to talk to your mothers first.”

They nodded and headed for the door, but Luna looked up at Azriel and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I’m sorry, Dad.”

Taking a deep breath, he hugged her and said, “I know. We’ll get this taken care of.”

She nodded, and followed Bennett out of the room.

Azriel and Rhysand both looked at Cassian, who had his hands on his hips and was staring blankly at a spot on the carpet.

Without another word, he grabbed his truck keys from where Bennett had left them on the bed and was out the door. There were words going about behind him as he went, but no one stopped him. It wasn’t until he was outside unlocking the driver’s side door that someone called his name.

“Cass.” He turned around to find his wife on the porch, holding up a shirt and his wallet. “Forgetting something?”

With a defeated sigh, he slowly walked back up to the porch and pulled his t-shirt over his head. “He got arrested for public indecency, Nesta. Marion came up. He was fucking in the back of my truck-.”

“Don’t act like you and I weren’t doing the same thing at eighteen,” she interrupted, looking up at her husband and his grim, frustrated expression. “Sneaking your girlfriend somewhere, taking advantage of the short time you have together… It wasn’t that long ago it was you and me.”

Cassian crossed his arms. “That’s not the point. How the hell are you so calm right now?”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong.” Nesta scoffed, one brow raised. “I’m gonna kick his ass when he gets home. He’s grounded, which he’ll protest because he’s eighteen, which is gonna make me kick his ass even more. But, for me to do that, you need to go get his ass and bring him to me, which I know you’re not gonna wanna do, because you're stubborn and pissed off.”

Cassian’s jaw locked. He didn’t say she was wrong…because she wasn’t.

“How many times were you arrested when you were his age?” she asked, rubbing her hands up and down his crossed arms.

Cassian didn’t answer.

“We all do stupid stuff,” she continued, then reached up on her tiptoes and kissed him, softly, even though Cassian’s lips hardly moved in return. “Go get him, have a civil conversation, don’t yell…too much. Then bring him home, so I can make him cry with my disappointed stare.”

At that, Cassian cracked the smallest smile, knowing she was absolutely right.

He turned to head for the truck and she hollered, “I’ll save him a plate. I doubt the food is very good in prison.”

Pausing as he opened the truck door, Cassian scoffed, glancing back at his wife. “He’s been in jail for less than three hours. I’m sure he’s fine.”

She was smirking, but he could see the sadness and worry in her eyes. “Bring my baby home safe, please.”

Half an hour later, Cassian was parking the truck in the lot behind the police station of the small town. It was mostly a vacation spot, for people like his family, so they’d never needed a big police force. Crime was low here. The worst sort of thing that happened in this town had: teenagers being stupid teenagers.

After speaking with the woman at the front desk, signing a bunch of paperwork and posting his bail, Cassian was leaning against a wall near the front door, waiting for his eldest son. A sullen looking Thorn appeared a moment later, an officer behind him. After shaking the man’s hand, Cassian and Thorn were out the door and heading for the truck. They hopped in, the engine revved to life, and they were off, heading back towards the cabin and their family that waited for them. And still a single word hadn’t been spoken.

Thorn was the one to break the silence. “Well?”

His tone immediately set Cassian on edge and he had to remind himself that that was because it was often so much like his own and to calm down. But it didn’t stop his hand from tightening on the wheel. He took a deep breath before saying, “Well, what?”

Cassian’s eyes were still on the road, but he could feel Thorn looking at him. “Aren’t you going to yell at me?”

“Do you want me to yell at you?” Cassian asked. “Do you want me to tell you what a dumbass decision you made today, not only jeopardizing your future, but also Marion’s, and you could have gotten your cousins into serious trouble, too?”

“Luna and Ben would’ve been fine,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and slumping in the seat. “They weren’t even involved—.”

“And Marion?” Cassian interrupted. “I assume since I didn’t get to have a nice chat with her father in the lobby, they let her go, but she could’ve been in big trouble, too, Thorn.”

The truck cab filled with silence and Cassian took another deep, calming breath before he went on. “Do you know what my first arrest was for?”

Thorn looked over at his father, the man on the Velaris Police Force who never did anything wrong. “You’ve been arrested?”

“More times than I’m going to admit,” Cassian said, but glanced at Thorn before settling his eyes back on the road. “And the first time was for public indecency.”

The silence returned. “Were you having sex-.”

“No,” Cassian said, stopping him before he could finish his sentence. “I was at a party, eighteen years old, and I got drunk, then went streaking down the middle of the road. It was a nice neighborhood, too. Scared the shit out of an old woman sitting on her porch, reading a book. There was a police car sitting right around the corner.” Cassian nodded to Thorn. “At least you were arrested with your clothes on.”

For a moment, Thorn said nothing, but then he laughed, quietly. “Sounds stupid.”

“It was stupid,” Cassian agreed. “Almost as stupid as shagging your girlfriend in the back of a truck in broad daylight.” He gestured outside, to the setting sun.

“Shagging?” Thorn repeated.

“You’d prefer me use a different term?” Cassian shot back.

Thorn shook his head. “Look, I get it, alright? But there was no one else around-.”

“Yeah, which is why you didn’t get yourself in deeper shit. If there had been kids around, Thorn—.” Cassian snapped, then took a second to calm himself back down. “If that cop hadn’t driven by the parking lot and seen the truck off, but moving, I’m sure you wouldn’t have gotten caught. You’re right. But, that’s not the point. The point is-.”

“I know, dad,” Thorn said, his tone hardening. “I don’t need the lecture.”

“No?” Cassian asked.

Thorn shook his head.

“You already know what I’m going to say, then?” Cassian pushed.

Thorn nodded.

Cassian snorted. “Then do tell. Please.”

“You already said it!” Thorn said, tossing his hands in the air. “I’m an idiot, alright? I made a dumbass decision because I can’t control myself. I almost got Marion and Ben and Luna in trouble, and I got my ass tossed into the back of a police car, alright? I know what I did wrong, dad. And I’m embarrassed enough, so…just…please. Save the lecture.” Near the end, his anger faded, and all Cassian could hear was defeat.

Cassian cleared his throat. “Why embarrassed?”

Thorn shot his dad an exasperated look. “Seriously? I just got my naked ass dragged off my girlfriend before getting handcuffed and thrown in the back of a cop car, and you want to ask me why I’m embarrassed?”

Cassian looked over the console at Thorn, then back to the road. “Worried she’ll dump you?”

Thorn thought for a second, then shook his head. “No, but it’s just…not how I wanted today to go.”

Cassian nodded, then thought carefully about how he would ask his next question. “When you two… I mean, I assume it’s not the first time you’ve… You’ve been together a while…” He sighed, then bluntly asked, “You’re careful, right?”

“She’s on the pill,” Thorn mumbled, and when Cassian glanced over as he pulled into the driveway and parked the truck, his son’s cheeks were bright red.

He smirked. “So you’re man enough to have sex, but not to talk about it?”

“Not with you,” he muttered, unbuckling his seatbelt and climbing out of the truck.

Cassian followed suit and clapped a hand firmly on his son’s shoulder. “Well, that’s too bad. Cause not only are you about to have to talk to me about it again, but your mother as well.”

Thorn’s eyes went wide and his feet stopped moving. In the moonlight, the color of his eyes weren’t visible and he looked like a mirror image of Cassian at that age. “Mom knows?”

“Oh, yeah,” Cassian replied, getting him moving again. “The only ones that don’t are your brother, sister, and cousins. But the three of us are about to have a conversation and I don’t know if you’ll enjoy it as much as you enjoyed ours.”

Cassian could see a fire going down by the docks and hear the laughter of his family. He knew there would be one person missing from the revelry and found her sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee and two plates of food on opposite sides of the table.

Nesta was rolling the coffee cup between her hands and her steely eyes flicked up to them the second they opened the sliding glass door.

Cassian didn’t say anything, just picked the plates of food up and took them to the microwave, heating them up, one by one.

Thorn lingered by the door, his hands shoved into his pockets. Finally, he started, “Mom, I—.”

Nesta held up a hand to stop him and pointed to the chair closest to her. “Sit.”

She stood and met Cassian in the kitchen, while Thorn did as he was told. She quietly asked him, “You talked?”

Cassian nodded, already diving into the plate of food. “Yeah.”

“You talked or you yelled?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

With a shrug, Cassian ate another bite of steak. “Both. I’d say it was a productive conversation.”

“So should I be the good cop or the bad cop?” She asked, crossing her arms and leaning against the counter.

“I think he’s probably had enough of cops today,” Cassian said, and Nesta could see he was trying not to smile. “Probably best for you to be his mother instead.”

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Nesta sighed. “You know what I mean, Cass. Do I need to break him down more or should I start picking up the pieces?”

“I’d say a bit of both,” he admitted. “He’s embarrassed, and rightfully so, but I don’t think the ramifications of how bad this could have been have settled in yet.”

She nodded and picked up the second plate. Looking up at her husband, she wrinkled her nose. “Go take a shower after you eat. You smell like the lake.”

Nesta didn’t give him a chance to answer and instead carried the food back out to the dining area and set it down in front of Thorn, before taking her seat again.

“I’m not hungry,” he mumbled, staring at the food in front of him.

“Too bad.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Eat.”

He did as he was told, eating a few bites in silence until Cassian crossed through the living room, headed for their bedroom. “By the way Nes,” he called out. “Marion is on the pill, in case you wondered.”

Thorn dropped the fork he was holding and covered his face. “Dad.”

“Have a good talk!”

Nesta had closed her eyes and was taking deep, controlled breaths. When she opened them again, her blue-grey eyes met Thorn’s identical ones. “I’m too young to be a grandmother.”

Thorn looked away as he said, “I’m not… We’re being careful.”

“It takes more than her being on the pill to be careful,” Nesta said, calmly. “Accidents happen.”

“I really don’t want to talk about this,” Thorn whispered, staring at his plate.

“Then you shouldn’t have gotten arrested for not being able to keep your hands to yourself,” Nesta replied, simply. “Thorn-.”

“I love her,” he replied, finally looking back up at Nesta. “I love her, and when I’m around her, I can’t even…think straight. I know what we did was stupid, mom, but in that moment…” He shook his head. “You can blame it on stupid teen hormones or whatever, but that wasn’t what this is for me.”

Nesta sighed, setting her coffee down and laying a hand over his. “It’s not that you got caught having sex. It’s not even that you were arrested, but that is a part of it. It’s that you lied to us, Thorn. To me, and your father, and your aunts and uncles. You told us going into town had nothing to do with Marion, but in all reality, that was the whole reason you wanted to go. And you roped Bennett and Luna into it, which could have affected them.”

He nodded, not saying anything, just taking the reprimand.

“We’re upset with you because we’re disappointed. This could have ended much worse, and Marion is lucky they let her go.”

Nesta released his hand, but turned her own palm up, holding it out and waiting. Thorn looked at it for a moment, before glancing up at her face, and sighing. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and placed it in her hand. She placed it on the edge of the table and said, “You won’t be getting this back for the rest of the weekend. And when we get home, your father and I will discuss your full punishment.”

“I got thrown in jail,” he mumbled. “Isn’t that punishment enough?”

Her sharp laugh surprised even herself. “Absolutely not. But this weekend isn’t just about us. It’s about your cousins and your aunts and uncles and spending time with them. So finish eating and go join them around the fire.”

“And if they ask where I’ve been?” He asked as she stood and picked his phone up.

Pausing for a moment, she considered telling him to tell them anything but the truth. But they would all find out eventually. “That’s up to you. But keep the sex talk to a minimum. Scar, Lannan and Layla don’t need to hear about that yet.”

Thorn’s jaw locked, but he nodded, once. He stood and cleared his plate, even though anything had hardly been eaten off of it. He stopped before walking out the back door. “Can I at least text Rion to make sure she got home alright?”

“I’ll text her mom,” Nesta replied, simply.

Thorn hesitated. “Saying what?”

“Just making sure she got home safely,” she said, shrugging. “I’ll tell her to let Marion know you're grounded from your phone for the weekend so that she doesn’t worry.”

Thorn nodded, slowly. “And…the other stuff?”

Nesta watched him for a long moment before saying, “Even I think having your ass handed to you by Mr. Salvaterre for being caught with his daughter by the cops is too harsh a punishment. I won’t say a thing.”

All of the breath left Thorn’s body. “Thanks.”

The second Thorn was out the door, Cassian came around the corner, his plate cleaned.

“I should’ve known you were listening,” Nesta said, sipping from her mug as she watched her husband stride to the sink.

As he set his plate inside, he chuckled. “Oh, I wasn’t missing that. And I think you should reconsider. Watching Lorcan kick Thorn’s ass for defiling his daughter may be good for us all.”

Nesta rolled her eyes and looked out the back door, where Thorn was slowly walking down the hill toward the fire. “He means it. I can tell. He loves that girl.”

“You sound like that worries you,” Cassian said, sitting in the chair next to her before pulling her onto his lap.

“I don’t want his heart broken. That’s my baby,” Nesta said, simply.

“Ah, yes,” Cassian muttered, his lips on her shoulder. “Our little felon.”

“Don’t call him that,” she chastised. “He made a mistake. A big, stupid mistake, but I think he understands the consequences of his actions.”

“He better,” he murmured. “They each only get one get out of jail free card.”

Nesta’s quiet laughter shook her body. “I’m fairly sure neither John or Scarlett will need theirs.”

“You’re probably right,” he said, holding her tighter against him. “We can let this go until we get home. Let’s enjoy our time while we’re here, yeah?”

“Exactly.” Nesta turned and kissed him, but when he made a move to deepen the kiss, she put a hand to his chest and pushed him away. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you smelled like a lake. You need a shower.”

Rolling his eyes, he gave her another quick kiss before she stood. “Fine. I’ll go get in the shower. But only if you promise to make me a s’more when I get out.”

“Sounds like a fair trade,” she said, heading for their bedroom, Thorn’s phone in hand.

“I’m surprised he didn’t ask you not to go through his search history,” Cassian called from where he still sat at the table.

“You’re disgusting,” she hollered back.

“I’ve also been an eighteen-year-old boy,” he chuckled.

“Oh, I remember well,” Nesta laughed, turning off her son’s phone and placing it on the top of her dresser.

Thorn would be fine, reckless nature and all. He was his father’s son, after all, and Cassian had turned out pretty damn good, even if he was the cockiest, most reckless young man Nesta had ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Even if said man was sliding out the back door and not following her down the hall to take a shower like he’d said he would.

Exasperated, Nesta went onto the back porch to yell at him, but he was running down the hill, taking off his shirt as he did so. Once he reached the bonfire, he was throwing Thorn over his shoulder and running down the dock, toward the lake.

Nesta had no idea how he could still toss Thorn around like a sack of potatoes. They were nearly the same height, with those same broad shoulders.

She watched as Cassian jumped off the end of the dock, taking Thorn with him beneath the dark water, jeans, shoes, and all.

Nesta laughed quietly as Rhysand, Azriel, Bennett, and John all followed their lead, running down the dock and diving in.

“Nesta!”

Her eyes shifted to the fire, where everyone else sat. Feyre was waving for her to join them. “Come have a drink and help us laugh at these foolish boys!”

Nesta could hear the girls giggling as she walked down the hill to join them. Lannan was sound asleep on the ground in front of the fire, obviously having worn himself out from the day, and Scarlett and Layla weren’t far behind.

Nesta took the lawn chair that either Rhys or Az had vacated between her sisters, and took a deep breath in as she gazed up at the stars. They weren’t as beautiful as the ones she’d come to know and love in Velaris, but they were still a glorious sight.

“Everything okay?” Elain asked, taking Nesta’s hand.

She nodded, eyes still on the stars. “We’ll deal with it when we get home,” she replied, looking down at her sisters. “For now, we want to enjoy this weekend. Enjoy our time with our family.”

Feyre and Elain both smiled at that and Feyre rested her head on Nesta’s shoulder.

Tomorrow would be a new day. The sun would be bright and shining and they’d spend the day how they’d originally planned.

But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be a day as crazy as today had been.

#the arrival #the return #acotar 2nd gen #snacmc collabs #snelbz tacmc collab #acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #acosf

[luvrgirl555]

what does leaving mean? (part two) -- S.R.

part one

masterlist

taglist: @introvertatitsfinest @criesinreid @hailmary-yramliah​ @youareperrrfectls​

an: thank you for so much love on part one <3 it really does mean the world to me and i hope this part two is good as well :) thank you for reading!! i always enjoy comments and notes as well hehe

2k+ words

warnings: some angst :( 

spencer kept his head pointed downwards while walking from the elevator to his desk in the bullpen.

the team wasn’t surprised, considering he had been keeping his distance from them the past couple of weeks, but they were starting to worry.

penelope, ever the peacemaker, decided to make him a cup of coffee and bring it over with only a few (15) bags of sugar.

she set the cup down on the coaster on his desk, the coaster that had been painted by the hands of a three year old little girl.

his three year old little girl.

he didn’t look up from the case file in his hands when penelope walked over to him, or even when she set the cup down or tried to hand him the sugar.

she gulped before asking, “reid?”

he looked up and blinked at her.

“are you alright?”

“fine,” he replied, clearing his throat and going back to the file.

at this point, jj, tara and luke made their way over to his desk as well each of them looking at him with sad eyes.

“man, you okay?” luke finally piped up, and spencer rolled his eyes.

“i thought we didn’t profile each other,” he span his desk chair around, partly so they couldn’t see his body language but also because they way they surrounded him made him feel like a victim getting hounded for answers.

“spence, if you need help you can always come to us,” jj said, her tone soft, motherly.

“goddammit,” he muttered and stood up, briskly walking away in the direction of the restrooms.

spencer was never good at hiding his emotions, never good at saying what was wrong, and especially not at asking for help.

was that why you’d left? he asked himself every moment.

all of the things that he’d done over the past months, past years, raced through his mind as he tried to piece together your relationship while he lie alone in his bed.

he didn’t know how he didn’t see it coming. had he really been so oblivious to all the signs? had you just been so good at hiding it?

he wished everything could go back to when you first met him and time stood still. when you taught him to dance with you in the kitchen and taught him that it’s okay to love again.

the cool water he splashed on his face didn’t make him feel better, or make the tears that constantly threatened to fall go away. nothing had been making him feel better.

he threw himself into case files, taking on extra work that he could do when he should have been sleeping.

he couldn’t sleep, not without you there, and especially not while knowing that he shouldn’t even call you or attempt to hear your voice. 

he thought you didn’t want that.

a feeling of hopelessness started to enter his mind, the same hopelessness he hadn’t felt in years, not since prison.

footsteps entering the room made him look up from the sink to see luke.

spencer looked back down at the sink, trying anything to avoid eye contact with his friend.

“we’re all just worried about you, man,” luke finally spoke.

spencer’s lips scrunched up to the right as he tried to keep it together.

“is it y/n? emma? are they okay?”

one of spencer’s hands went to cover his watery eyes as luke pulled him in for a hug.

spencer’s entire body just seemed to break down in luke’s arms. he felt like his legs turned into jelly as he clung onto luke’s shoulders for dear life and he cried.

he sobbed.

something luke had never seen before, not from spencer.

everyone assumed that he was an unbreakable man. someone who had gone through everything, and someone who was incredible at coping.

none of those things weren’t true.

“she’s gone,” he sniffled “they’re all gone.”

luke was able to stand spencer back on his feet while spencer rubbed the remaining tears from his face.

“they’re gone?” luke tried to clarify.

“she’s left, and i don’t know if she’s coming back.”

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

“mama,” a little voice says while little hands tug on your jeans.

“what is it, ems?” you reply, warily. you haven’t been getting much sleep recently. possibly due to the fact that you were around 30 weeks pregnant and more likely due to the fact that you missed your spencer.

it didn’t feel hard, basically raising emma on your own because you’d done that before. every time spencer was on a case, or when she was really little and he was in prison. it wasn’t that transition that you struggled with, it was the fact that you didn’t feel like you could call him. the fact that emma asked for him around 30 times a day, and rising, because she hadn’t seen him for weeks.

“mama, where daddy?” she asked.

“daddy’s at work,” you replied, just like every other time she asked.

you handed her a sippy cup filled with juice and led her to the sofa to sit.

you had been staying at a friends house after you called her sobbing with the news a few days after you’d left the house.

“can daddy read me?” she asked running over the bag you’d brought with some of her things, including a few picture books.

“i don’t think so. i think daddy’s busy,” you offered, gently brushing her blonde curls out of her eyes.

“call?” she asked softly, and by the way she stuck her bottom lip out you knew she was about to cry.

she’d been a strong little girl, always trying to comfort you when you cried and rarely crying herself, even when she wanted her dad, but you knew that would be coming to an end very soon.

you sighed.

“do you want to go see if daddy’s at work with auntie jj and auntie penny?” you asked and a smile immediately returned to her face.

she was tired, you could tell, but you had a feeling she’d go down for a nap much better with a story from her father.

and you could also tell that you needed to see him too.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

“right, we’ll see you soon,” jj hung up the phone and breathed a sigh of relief.

“what was that all about?” rossi asked, while dropping off some papers for her.

“y/n and emma are headed over here,” she whispered and dave hummed with a smile and a nod.

just then spencer walked back into the room, looking more disheveled and less bright eyed than before. luke followed after him, giving him a few pats on the back before heading to his respective desk.

spencer quickly made his way up the stairs and knocked on the door to emily’s office. she let him in quickly and jj could see through the window that he sat down and she sat beside him while his head was bowed.

minutes felt like hours while jj watched emily comfort, or at least try to comfort him while he cried.

minutes later when he stood up and began to exit the room the doors to the bau opened behind jj.

in ran an excited three year old girl, bounding as fast as her little legs could carry her.

you followed behind her, sadly smiling at how happy and excited she was.

she needed this.

when spencer saw her tears immediately rushed to his eyes for what felt like the millionth time today.

he needed this.

“dada!” emma screamed, which made a few people in the office laugh but she didn’t care, and neither didn’t her mom or dad.

he went down the stairs and walked towards his little daughter quickly scooping her up in his arms and holding her tight.

she lay her head on his shoulder and tried to wrap her arms around his neck while she giggled.

“hi baby,” he whispered, running his hands through her thin, blonde hair.

you could tell he was crying but trying not to show it, which made tears well in your eyes even more.

he looked over at you and you smiled, but he could see the sadness in your eyes.

“y/n!” you heard, the one and only penelope exclaim when she walked in the room and you looked over your shoulder to greet her.

she, along with jj and emily gave you a hug while spencer brought emma over to his desk and sat down with her on his lap.

you walked over to them when you were done greeting everyone and pulled the book emma had insisted on out of your purse.

you could see her talking animatedly while she sat, constantly moving her hands just like he did.

spencer just smiled so big he didn’t feel like anything could ever ruin this moment.

“and miss you, daddy,” you heard her say when she quickly gave him another hug.

he gave her another squeeze.

“i miss you too, ems,” he replied and she began to pull away and pointed at you.

“mama miss you,” she said simply.

he looked up at you and you nodded a little bit, looking down where you couldn’t see much of anything except your pregnant belly.

“i miss mama, too,” he whispered and she smiled.

“read me?” emma quickly asked, completely not understanding social cues which made you smile.

“of course!” he exclaimed while you handed the book over.

he didn’t need it, he had every single one of her books memorized, he could have recited an entire library for her, but he opened the book and started on page one while she lay in the crook of his neck to fall asleep.

you listened while he spoke in different tones and inflections, his eyes moving swiftly across the page. you tried desperately to memorize this moment in your head, so you could never forget what he looked like, especially when he looked so happy.

you needed this.

when he finished he handed you back the book and you tried to take emma back, “well we should be going,” you said. “thank you for reading to her, she wouldn’t go down without it.”

“wait, y/n,” he quickly stood up and bit his lip nervously.

“spencer?” you replied when he didn’t say anything more.

jj came and grabbed emma from you when she noticed what was going on, and you gulped when spencer grabbed your free hands.

“can we talk?” he asked.

you breathed heavily.

“spence-” you started but he cut you off, already knowing what you were going to say.

“just a few minutes?”

you conceded, and he led you to an empty room that you remember previously being derek’s office.

he grabbed both of your hands again and you looked up at him, a huff on your face.

“i wasn’t lying when i said i miss you,” he said.

“i miss you too,” you said, “but now i don’t have to get my hopes up.”

you pulled away and walked behind him.

“i messed up.”

“yeah...” you trailed off. you could feel the hurt in your heart manifesting through your voice and you began crying softly.

“oh, please,” spencer turned to look at you, “don’t cry.”

“i can’t seem to stop,” you hastily wiped the water from your face.

“i’m so sorry,” he whispered.

you nodded.

“i know.”

he gulped.

“i’m sorry, too,” you brushed a piece of hair behind your ear, “for leaving like that.”

“i understand why you did,” spencer gently takes your hand again. “i’ve been a horrible father and even worse husband.”

“i wouldn’t say horrible,” you argued.

he shook his head, “i promised i would never end up like my father, and i did,” he seems annoyed at himself. “i pushed and pushed you away, and i have never been more sorry for anything.”

you can tell how sincere he is by the way his eyes lock on yours and how tightly his hand is squeezing.

you close your eyes and quickly fall into his arms in the tightest hug you both can manage, feeling gentle kicks between the two of you.

“i don’t want you to leave, y/n,” he says, shakily.

“i don’t want to leave.”

you feel his hands gently cup your face as he leans down to connect your lips with his. you melt in the feeling that you’ve been missing and craving for so long.

when you opened your eyes he said, “i’ll start teaching again, full time even, whatever it takes.”

you smile.

“i don’t want you to quit your job, spence,” you bring your hand up to his cheek and stroke with your thumb, “i just want you to come be with us every one in a while.”

“i promise,” he says grabbing your arm and kissing you again.

as hard as he can.

promising himself he’ll never lose you again.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds imagine #matthew gray gubler #mgg #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff

[heavenseed76]

Contentment

Rating:G

Fandom: The Walking Dead

Summary: Daryl saves Paul from certain death and some truths are revealed

Warnings: Mentions of blood, death, canon-typical violence

When mothers lift cars off their children it is not because their love or fear make them super strong. It is because adrenaline will make a person immune to the sensation of pain. Their muscles and tendons are often irreparably damaged. Human beings will tear themselves apart for the people they love. Daryl Dixon was no different.

He couldn’t recall how he was able to get to Michonne’s horse, nor how he hauled the limp form of his friend onto the horse with him. He was vaguely aware that he could hear Dog whimpering somewhere behind him, punctuating the sound of another horse beside him. In his arms, Paul Rovia, wrapped in a saddle blanket, armor long forgotten, slumped forward. Every few minutes Daryl could feel the man tense beneath his arm, locked as if it was welded across Paul’s chest. The man in his arms was in pain, barely breathing, but thankfully alive. Daryl couldn’t think beyond getting Paul back to Hilltop, to Enid, to safety.

Riding in the fog made a trip that would have taken eons stretch even further. There was no sense of distance, nothing to mark the passing of the miles. The trip, longer still holding his friend’s life in his hands, seemed like a dream: the ubiquitous nightmare where you try to reach someone at the end of a long path and the faster you run, the further away they become. With each gallop, Daryl could feel Paul’s life spilling out onto his chest, his arms, soaking the blanket he was wrapped in. He could feel the labored breath, deep pulls of air that went nowhere. At first Paul held on to Daryl’s arm as they rode, though they eventually fell away, too weak to hold on.

Through the fog, Daryl heard Aaron yelling for the sentries to open the gate at Hilltop before Daryl even saw the walls. Aaron kicked his horse into a sprint and easily passed Daryl’s horse. Seeing the end in sight, Daryl pressed his own heels into the flanks of the beast on which he rode and urged the animal to go faster. He followed Aaron straight to the medical trailer, where Enid and Alden were already helping him off his horse.

“No!” Aaron kept the wiggly bundle in his arms from slipping and motioned to Enid and Alden to help Daryl. “Get Jesus!” Without waiting for them to acknowledge him, Aaron rushed into the medical trailer.

Daryl brought his horse up short next to Aarons, and then there were too many hands, too many faces below him, pushing and pulling at Paul. At Enid’s insistence, her eyes full of dread and sympathy, Daryl broke the iron grip he had around Paul and let him slip gently into the waiting arms of Alden and Siddiq, who wasted no time making room for Henry and Kal to help carry his pale body into the trailer. He dismounted Michonne’s horse, letting someone with gentle hands take the reigns from him. He stood staring at the door, behind which two of the people he cared for most in the world could be dying, or worse, turning… Along with his beloved Dog.

He felt familiar hands on his arms, attempting to turn him aware from the trailer, and distantly heard soft words filter through the fog filling his mind, urging him to come away. Hot, angry tears spilled over and silently marked his blood-stained face and suddenly he was unable to catch his breath. He wanted to rush in and pull Paul back into his arms and never let go. If he died… If Paul turned… he needed to be there for that. But Aaron was in there, and he wanted to keep his friend from suffering that end alone.

“Daryl, come get cleaned up.” Carol’s voice was a solid mass he could anchor himself to, as his grief threatened to let him float away like ashes. He started to let her lead him into Barrington House, when Aaron came through the trailer door.

Eyes red, brows pulled in to etch lines of worry into his forehead, Aaron quickly made his way to Daryl.

“Dog’s gonna be OK. Paul…” Aaron’s voice wavered, but he swallowed and carried on. “Paul’s fighting. His lung collapsed and he lost a lot of blood.” Without warning Daryl pulled his friend into his arms, and with a sob he had been holding in the entire journey, Aaron hugged him back, fingers fisting in the worn leather of his vest. Watching them, the lump in Carol’s throat grew, and she had to cover her mouth with both hands to keep her cry from tearing a hole in the comforting bubble the men had made.

***

The sun burned away the fog that had settled over Hilltop, and the morning promised a beautiful day ahead. At a picnic table near the medical trailer, Aaron and Daryl sat vigil, their backs against the edge of the table top. Aaron absently cleaned his prosthetic arm with a rusty can of WD40 and a ragged bandana he kept for the express purpose. Like the Tin Man. Daryl thought. They were both clean, in clothes that didn’t smell like gore. Carol had not been able to coax either man into eating or trying to sleep.

“We’ve wasted so much time.” Aaron sighed and set the rag he’d been using aside. “This is a big damned wake-up call.” He was used to companionable silence with Daryl, used to holding up both ends of a conversation, so when Daryl didn’t respond, he just kept talking. “We’ve been lucky. To make it this long. But this world is still just as dangerous as it ever was. I feel so stupid…”

Daryl chewed his bottom lip, listening. He had been there when Aaron dove head first into being a father to Gracie, burying Eric’s death deep beneath the needs of a tiny, new being. It occupied his mind, it gave him an outlet for his affection and focused his energy. It did not, however, fill the gaping love-shaped void left when Eric’s corpse walked off into the woods. It was one of the many ways Daryl felt he had failed everyone in his life; it was one of the many reasons he walked off into the woods That Day, and didn’t look back. The seams holding his family together tore open That Day, and try as he might, he alone didn’t have the strength to stitch it back together. Neither did anyone else, apparently.

“I did it for you, you know.” Daryl said, his voice gravel in his throat.

Aaron turned his expressive blue eyes to Daryl’s, not having expected a two-way conversation. “Did what?”

Daryl looked away, unsure of himself. “Saved him. I know you two… I know he means a lot to you. I saw Dog attack that walker, and heard you yell, and I just, I don’t know man, I just couldn’t let him die…” Meeting Aaron’s eyes he said, “I didn’t want you to hurt no more.”

Something sparked in Aaron’s chest. Affection, love, gratitude… he didn’t know what or how many of those things he was feeling. He stared at Daryl for a long moment. There was only one thing he could think to say. “Thank you.” Aaron pressed infinitesimally closer into Daryl’s warm shoulder with his own.

Daryl nodded, glad he could make his friend smile, even if things didn’t turn out as well as they hoped. It had been hours, and except for Alden leaving to give Enid and Siddiq room to work, and getting Alex to come in to better assist, there had been little news of Paul’s welfare.

“I know you’ve been coming here to see him.” Daryl shifted nervously. “He make you happy?”

A man of few words, Daryl could say so much with so little effort. It took Aaron a moment to understand what Daryl was asking, and when the implication of the question hit him, he felt like he had been slapped. He scooted away from Daryl on the bench of the picnic table, so he could fully turn to face Daryl.

“You do know we’re just friends, right?” Aaron’s frown returned, and Daryl didn’t know how to respond. “We’re not… we’ve never… Jesus and I are good friends, that’s all.” Aaron watched confusion slide over the hunter’s face. If Paul weren’t dying behind the door of the medical trailer, Aaron may have laughed. “You know Jesus is… he’s in love with you!”

“No.” Daryl sat up taller, and Aaron could nearly see the walls being built around the other man.

“Yeah. He’s been in love with you since he brought you home from the Sanctuary! Daryl, how could you not know?”

The hunter stood, defiantly staring his friend down. “He don’t.” He tried to turn away, but Aaron was right there.

“He does. That’s what I meant! We all have to stop wasting time we might not have, Daryl!” Aaron grabbed Daryl’s bicep and swung around to face the stoic man. “I know you. I know you both. And if there’s anything I’m sure of, its that you two belong together. Even if I was interested, that man’s heart belongs to you!”

It was if the last brick fit into place in the fortress of Daryl’s heart. The realization that not only did Aaron see how he felt for Paul, but that Paul felt the same for him, and had made it a known fact. Overwhelmed with the severity of this revelation, Daryl’s dread swelled, and he felt as though all the oxygen had been sucked out of the world. The truth Aaron spoke filled his eyes with hot tears, of shame and joy and sickening worry. Seeing all this take shape in his friend, Aaron pulled him in for an awkward hug.

The harsh slap of the trailer door snapping closed brought the men up for air. Standing on the steps to the trailer was an exhausted Enid, covered in blood. Neither could move, holding their breath.

A smile bloomed on the woman’s face as she said simply, “He’ll be OK.”

***

In his own bed inside Barrington House, Paul Rovia looked smaller than Tara had ever seen him. The trip up the stairs and into the bed had worn him out, and he fell asleep almost immediately. He didn’t even flinch as she started a new IV in his hand. She watched him, his breath shallow and lips twisted in a pained expression. He was pale, his eyes sunken. Laying in his bed with only a bandage across his chest, his strong body laid bare and vulnerable, Tara took stock of all the things they would have lost if the man in front of her hadn’t made it home. Despite his reluctance, Paul was a good leader, and she tried every day to convince him of it. People loved and respected him because he was willing to go outside the walls and risk it all to strengthen them.

“How is he?” Daryl’s low rasp shook Tara from her reverie.

“Exhausted. He’s got some pain killers, so he’s comfortable enough to sleep.” Tara covered Paul in a thin blanket. “Come in. Sit. I’ll be back in a bit to check on him.” Sheepishly, Daryl entered the room, letting Tara give his arm and affectionate squeeze as she went past.

It had been several days since the cemetery, and Daryl had barely slept. Seeing Paul gravely injured had shifted something inside him, something Aaron had nudged to hang just the right way.

“Gonna keep watch on me?” Paul’s voice was just a whisper on his lips. He turned his palm up on the bed, an invitation.

Daryl sat on the edge of the bed, slipping his big hand into Paul’s smaller one. “Feelin OK?” He let his thumb caress the top of Paul’s hand.

Paul nodded, then winced, which Daryl caught even though he tried to hide it. “As long as I don’t move. Or breathe.” He gave a Daryl a thin smile. “You’re too far away.”

Daryl slipped off his boots and lay down beside Paul, mindful of the bandage across his chest. “This OK?”

Paul hummed affirmatively. His limbs were heavy, though he positioned himself close enough to lay he head on Daryl’s shoulder. He laced his fingers together with Daryl’s between their bodies. He could feel the other man relax against him, and if he hadn’t been so exhausted, Paul may have quipped at Daryl to make him blush.

“I’m sorry.” Daryl placed a firm, confident kiss on Paul’s forehead. “Wasted too many years. We have a chance now and I ain’t gonna fuck it up.” He reached over and felt the smooth skin of Paul’s temple with the back of his hand, reveling in the new-found ability to show his affection.

Paul took his hand, kissing the palm and then holding it to his chest, just above his bandage. “You better not. I love you, Daryl Dixon, but you know I will kick your ass.” Paul’s lips quirked up on one side and he peered at Daryl through heavy eyelids.

Daryl huffed a laugh and kissed Paul’s head again, snuggling into the warmth of the other man’s presence. They fell asleep, Paul holding Daryl’s hand to himself, so the hunter could feel every beat of his heart. That is where Dog found them, limping on a bandaged leg, letting Aaron help him into the bed to curl up at their feet, content.

#thewalkingdead #twd #daryldixon #twdfanfiction #desus #paul jesus rovia #twdaaron #gayfanfiction #7daynosmutchallenge

[recurringwriter]

For Felix and your choice! (: 22. How tightly do we need to be pressed against each other before you admit that you aren't doing this for warmth? Tara Love from This. This Is Too Far

I'm glad you liked them. ;w;

ahhh thank you for sending this prompt i love it and was saving it until i could think of which pairing i wanted, and since it's leonie day i went with her. i wrote this with Zero Plan, which is even less than i usually do. it's very much a stream of consciousness but i love some of the sentences so much i found a groove eventually. anyway, 1,194 words of feleonie:

-

Felix relied on her.

Leonie was strong, she was quick-witted, she was practical and as sharp as a knife. Throughout the war, and after, Felix could always count on her to have his back, even when he insisted he didn't need that. She was always there, despite the way he pushed her away. It had been that way from the start, and he didn't know if it was out of a true sense of rivalry--that she'd seen him as one of the most skilled students at the Academy and had wanted to best him--or if she had known that her persistence would lead to this:

A partnership.

It was something Felix had never even considered. He would have laughed it off, scornful. Attachments were a liability, they meant leaving behind sad, pathetic mourners when you died.

But after the war, Felix hadn't turned Leonie down. He'd gone with her, into the unknown, risking his life while knowing that he'd grieve if she ever did the same.

And Leonie stayed close. Like she was fearless. Like she'd never lose anyone again.

"You and I will make a great team," she'd said, rubbing the top of Felix's head so that he hissed like a cat. "With your skill and my smarts, we'll rake in all kinds of coin in the mercenary business!"

Felix had ignored the jibe about his intelligence, because he hadn't wanted to go home, and he'd agreed. He would work with her for a year.

At the year's end, Leonie asked him to stay for another.

"We're doing so good! And I've got another job lined up and if it's just me I could bring back the arm of this gang that's operating near Derdriu--but with you we could go for the boss of the whole thing and make even more money."

Felix liked a challenge, and he could see how this job would help a lot of people that were being affected by the gang. He agreed, writing his father a letter to say that he was going to stay away for a little while longer.

His father's reply either was never sent or got lost somewhere along the way. Felix used it as an excuse to agree to Leonie's request that he stay on for another five months.

In the Faerghus winter, they left the bulk of their mercenary troop behind to pursue their targets on foot, alone. The terrain was rough and the weather was bad, a heavy sky promising hours of snow to obscure the trail of their quarry.

Under a makeshift shelter, the two of them sat side by side, pressed together like they had been so many times before--back to back, side to side, chest to chest in an impulsive, victorious embrace.

"How many Faerghan storms have you gone through? Like this, I mean?" Leonie asked, and her voice betrayed some of her nerves about the whole situation, not that most people would recognize it. In the distance, a lonely wolf howled.

"Enough to know we'll be fine," Felix said, letting Leonie lean closer. He fiddled with the fastening of his cloak.

"Hm?"

Felix swung his cloak around them both, holding it there with an arm slung across Leonie's shoulders. "Better?"

Leonie headbutted him, gently. "I was fine! You don't have to treat me like a damsel!"

"You? A damsel?"

Leonie snorted. "I know you need me. No one else provides you with the excuses you need to stay on the road."

"Hmph." Felix noticed that despite her insistence that she was fine, Leonie did not throw his cloak off, and in fact leaned a little closer. "And no one else's name brings you the kind of jobs that my famous skills do."

"Smug," Leonie said. Both of them knew that the mercenaries were Jeralt's in memory only. His name meant little this long after his death. Everyone had moved on. It was just Leonie keeping the group alive.

Leonie and Felix.

They sat, staring into their modest little fire, which popped anew with every new spruce branch they added. It would be a long night, and there was nothing to say anymore. They'd spent so much time together, working, fighting, celebrating, drinking--silence spoke of trust. It was filled only by the cry of that distant wolf--or it might have been the wind.

Leonie yawned and shifted her hips, curling closer to Felix like she would crawl into his lap if she could. It made him smile, like she was a cat nonchalantly trying to absorb his warmth without letting him believe that she wanted him.

The fire momentarily darkened, the flicker leaving Felix wondering if he'd just blinked for too long. "Leonie?"

"Mhm?"

"How--" Felix licked his lips. "How tightly do we need to be pressed together before we admit that we aren't doing this for warmth?"

Head resting against his shoulder, Leonie frowned at the fire. Felix wasn't looking at that anymore. He was looking at her hair, the way strands of it seemed like fine, copper wire in the orange glow. It was familiar. It was important to him.

"What do you mean?" Leonie asked, nonchalant--I'm not purring, see? You're convenient, that's all. It's always a matter of convenience, nothing more.

Felix didn't want to be the one to say it. Words weren't his strong suit. "Nothing," he said.

"Oh."

They fell silent again. The safety of their unspoken words settled back over them, and Felix watched Leonie's eyes slowly close. He turned his attention back to the fire. It sent a small spray of sparks towards the sky as a glob of sap exploded. Whatever they'd faced, whatever was still to come, it was peaceful, here. Felix didn't mind. He thought that he could grow accustomed to it.

"You're kind of like a cat," Leonie murmured, surprising Felix.

"How so?"

"I can't pick you up unless you want it. If I try you jump away but if I don't you complain that there's no work. But--you could go home. You always have that--the security of it. I don't know what I'd do if mercenary work dried up forever."

Felix might have teased Leonie for admitting, in a roundabout way, that she needed him. But the darkness around them made the small amount of light they inhabited seem fragile. The wolf's howl far away only made them seem more isolated.

"It's not just for warmth," Felix said at length. "I like this. This part. The being with you."

"Felix?"

He couldn't look at her anymore. He felt his face heating up--the wrong kind of warmth for the night, in his opinion. "This is home."

And home was warm, and home was safe.

"You are home," Felix admitted, just a breath.

Leonie was close enough to hear. "I've never been--"

"Leonie," Felix said. "We're partners."

"We're partners," Leonie repeated. "This is our home."

There wasn't anything else to say, so Felix let the silence speak. He let Leonie find his free hand and thread their fingers together, for warmth--for home.

In the distance, a second wolf joined the first, singing a song of home.

#fe3h #recurring writings #felix hugo fraldarius #leonie pinelli #i tried to leave it ambiguous whether this is romantic or if they're both ace you can read it either way #but know that i like demi felix and aroace leonie best

[stxrrywildflower]

for better or for worse (2)

pairing - spencer reid x reader

summary - when the people they love the most are kidnapped and ripped out of their hands, the bau does everything they can to get them back before it turns dire

warnings - mentions of case, angst, injury details

series masterlist

drugs were coursing through your veins. you could tell that from the minute your eyes slowly opened.

instead of being met with bright lights or some random room, you were met with total darkness. the cloth veil over your head prevented you from seeing anything. a second cloth was secured around your face, acting as a gag to prevent you from calling out.

your head lolled slightly, due to both the drugs and actually having some form of control over your movements.

the cloth was violently ripped off, now exposing the environment you were in.

your eyes met andrew’s, who was sitting across from you. through still hazy eyes, you looked back and forth, desperate to try and figure out your surroundings.

penelope was to your right and leslie to your left. next to her was kristy, then andrew, krystall, and finally will.

the seven of you made up an almost perfect circle, one person facing another. you were tied of the same way, arms restrained behind the chair while your legs were tied to the base of the chair.

everyone was still fairly loopy, though penelope was sober enough to have tears already flowing down her cheeks.

“welcome everyone!” a voice called.

the three men, the same ones who delt with the fabric over your faces, stood in a triangle around the edge of your circle. each had on a full face masks preventing you from seeing their identities.

“what the hell do you want with us,” andrew spat out after managing to get the gag out of his mouth. everyone was more than fine with him taking charge, he was the fbi agent after all.

“you,” the one with the blue mask started, twirling a knife in hand, “are going to tear your other halves into pieces emotionally and i’m sure physically.”

he went on for another few minutes, the others chipping in occasionally. the whole thing was strategically planned out, unless the team found you, you wouldn’t be getting out anytime soon.

you were the first one to receive any form of an injury.

your occasional snarky and sarcastic personality trait was coming in force. as the three men entered the room, only to taunt the group, you couldn’t help but call them out.

“imagine thinking your going to get something good out of kidnapping all of us,” you started. “you guys are a bunch of morons who’s heads are pretty much wanted on platters by the team and i’m-” you were cut off by a hard punch to your cheek.

a gasp espacped your lips, pain radiating in both your eye and nose. a thin steam of blood trickled down your face. between the drugs hitting you even harder with the final effects on your body and now this, you were extremely exhausted.

they left the room soon after that, no clues or hints on where they were going.

“you okay?” will’s thick accent took a second to process in your head.

“fine,” you grumbled, moving your head to the side to wipe the blood from your nose on your shirt. “the teams going to get us out of this,” kristy spoke, as if to reassure herself. “i know they will.”

back at quantico, the team all sat around the table, still looking down at the phones. “i really hate to say it, but there’s little we can do until the kidnappers make contact.”

“are you joking?” spencer exclaimed, “do you really expect us to just sit here and wait while everyone is probably being tortured by the bastards who took them?”

they hated to admit, he did have a point.

j.j. led luke out of the room, keeping one hand on his back to comfort the agent who was moments away from breaking down crying.

“spencer, a word?”

the genius grumbled to himself quietly, pushing his chair back before following emily out of the conference room and into her office. “i need you to calm down,” she spoke gently.

that was easily one of the worst things she could have said to spencer.

“no i’m not going to calm down prentiss,” spencer snapped. “i lost maeve to an unsub the same way. how dare you tell me to ‘calm down’ when y/n is missing and we have absolutely no idea where her or the others went.”

emily frowned slightly at the mention of the event from almost eight years ago. while the current unit chief wasn’t on the case, she had heard about it while in london and did everything she could from where she was to help out spencer.

“i want you to take a walk. we need your head clear and ready to work,” emily spoke gently. spencer opened his mouth, wanting to protest but shut it quickly. he wanted to do as emily said, for your sake at least.

spencer shook his head, leaving the office after grabbing his bag and heading towards the elevator. maybe some fresh air would do him some good.

“why not me,” luke mumbled, barely audible to the blonde agent.

j.j. had taken luke to morgan’s old office to help him calm down. her motherly instincts had kicked in, especially as she knew how emotional luke could get in situations like these, stress adding on as it involved penelope.

“why did they take penelope instead of me? i’m apart of this team too,” tears started to flow down luke’s cheeks. j.j. pressed her lips together, wanting to stay strong enough for both his and her sake. her mind creeped back to will, desperately hoping he was okay.

“i don’t know luke, i really don’t. but trust me when i say, we will find them,” she reassured, wrapping an arm around the fellow agent. “thanks j, do you mind giving me a minute alone?”

j.j. nodded, squeezing his shoulder one more time before standing up just as her phone rang.

“my mom is coming down to get the boys. matt, she can take a few of yours,” j.j. announced once she met up with matt and rossi. they needed the kids handled so full focus could be on solving the case.

“joy is also flying in, she was on her way even before this whole thing. she can watch keely and the others” rossi chipped in. emily joined the group just in time to hear rossi’s offer.

matt nodded, the three parents in mutual agreement. “i’m going to meet up with tara and get started on some work. i mean what else can we do.”

“how’s spencer?”

“frustrated,” emily answered. “i’m honestly suprised no one else is on his level.”

j.j. sighed. “emily i don’t know what we’re going to do,” she admitted. “agents aren’t supposed to work cases when they’re personally involved. and with this, i mean we all are. what are we even supposed to do?”

“we really need reinforcements.”

——

“have you heard?”

“yeah i’m about to head over now. you?”

“same. are we really bringing our badges out of retirement?”

“hey don’t say retirement. makes us sound old.”

“true.”

“and yes we’re heading back. they’re family, and they need our help.”

with that, the phone call ceased.

the bullpen seemingly stopped, all eyes going over to the glass doors. none other than aaron hotchner and derek morgan stepped in, bags by their side and visitors badge clipped to their pants.

their styles altered greatly. hotch was dressed down in jeans and a patagonia quarter buttoned pullover, work boots as his shoe of choice. morgan was the same, opting for a t-shirt and zip up instead.

agents nodded as a sign of respect at the two former agents, their legacy with the bau team was still looked up to.

the current bau team seemed empty.

no one jumped up to greet them. no one hugged. no one could even muster up a convincing enough smile.

they all just looked down, going back to their individual work. spencer and luke were at the genius’s desk, chairs pressed close together as they put together information. rossi, j.j., and tara were in the conference room, boards put up with pictures of the phones as well as screenshots from street cameras. that left matt and emily who were engaged in a deep conversation.

emily stopped when she noticed the two men lingering. “go help spencer and luke. let them know to meet up with the other three when they’re done,” she ordered.

“thank you for coming, i wish we could meet under different circumstances,” she spoke, expending her hand out for them to shake. “we can talk in my office.”

the two former agents followed the current unit chief up, not bothering to sit in the chairs, preferring to stand. “bet you didn’t expect to be back in here,” morgan nudged hotch.

“is the team holding up okay? everyone seemed a little numb,” derek commented.

“how’s the investigation going? what do you have nailed down so far?” hotch quickly added.

“nothing, we have absolutely nothing. just broken cell phones and the word ‘love.’ we don’t have a tech analyst so we can’t even figure out half of the stuff we need to. no one can even focus right because we’ve had the people we love taken away with no means of communication or no clues. i think it’s understandable that we’re a little numb. and i just don’t know what to do because i’m dealing with myself and keely and also having to be a leader of the team,” emily stopped herself, running her hand through her hair to calm down.

her rant was pretty all over the place, mirroring the emotions she was feeling.

“which is why we’re here,” hotch stated. “morgan and i have the most clear heads out of everyone. if you say the word, we can lead this investigation and track down the unsubs. it would be the easiest way to make sure we get everyone back.”

emily nodded, wrapping her arms around herself. “okay. just please help us find them,” she pleaded. “we will, i promise.”

it was almost five hours before the mixed team found anything. a postal service worker stepped into the bullpen, holding a box and ipad in the other. anderson talked to him for a moment, motioning for emily to come down.

“i have a package for emily prentiss. you just need to sign here,” he repeated. emily was still hesitant, but leaned forward to write her signature.

emily held the box out in front of her, careful to keep her movements still as one wrong movement could set it off if it was in fact dangerous. she brought it up to the conference room, placing it on the table.

“it’s not an explosive,” derek determined after his examination. silence fell over the room.

tara was the one who leaned forward to open the box. her hands were shaky, directly due to her nervousness. no one knew what was inside, other than that it wasn’t a bomb.

all eyes were on the box, listing as the tape was cut open, them the cardboard flaps lifted.

bloody jewelry was inside; three wedding rings, two necklaces, a bracelet, and finally a helix earring.

spencer took a sharp breath. each piece of jewelry belonged to an individual taken. yours was the earring, an anniversary gift from him. the usual gold piece was now stained red.

the hope the team had for you all being alive cracked just a little bit more.

☆ ☆ ☆

tags - @zozoleesi @emxlyprentxss @spencerreidfanatic00 @mrs-dr-reid @irjuejjsaa @ogmilkis @sageellesworth05 @mortallythoughtfulgurl @brainyreid @ah-blossom @kissessforharryyy @ssareidbby @spencersglasses @spenciepoo338 @mggstyles @emilouu @loki-an-idiot @reidsmyhusband-emilysmymistress @pianofirepirate @ssa-morgan @afuckingshituniverse @spencerslatte @reminiscing-writer

#criminal #criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #david rossi #penelope garcia #luke alvez #matt simmons #tara lewis

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About Loki (Season One)

(Sorry this is later than it should have been. I may or may not be experiencing burnout from reviewing every episode of the gayest show Disney has ever produced)

Salutations, random people on the internet. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

Do you want to know what's fun about the Marvel Cinematic Universe? It is now officially at the point where the writers can do whatever the hell they want.

A TV series about two Avengers getting stuck in a series of sitcoms as one of them explores their personal grief? Sure.

Another series as a guy with metal bird wings fights the inner racism of his nation to take the mantel of representing the idea of what that nation should be? Why not?

A forgettable movie about a superspy and her much more mildly entertaining pretend family working together to kill the Godfather? F**king go for it (Let that be a taste for my Black Widow review in October)!

There is no limit to what you can get with these movies and shows anymore, and I personally consider that a good thing. It allows this franchise to lean further into creative insanity, thus embracing its comic roots in the process. Take Loki, for example. It is a series about an alternate version of one of Marvel's best villains bouncing around the timeline with Owen Wilson to prevent the end of the universe. It sounds like just the right amount of wackiness that it should be too good to fail.

But that's today's question: Did it fail? To find out my own answer to that, we're gonna have to dive deep into spoilers. So be wary as you continue reading.

With that said, let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Loki Himself: Let's get this out of the way: This isn't the same Loki we've seen grow within five movies. The Loki in this series, while similar in many ways, is still his very own character. He goes through his own redemption and developments that fleshes out Loki, all through ways that, if I'm being honest with you, is done much better in six-hour-long episodes than in past films. Loki's story was already entertaining, but he didn't really grow that much aside from being this chaotic neutral character instead of this wickedly evil supervillain. Through his series, we get to see a gradual change in his personality, witnessing him understand his true nature and "glorious purpose," to the point where he's already this completely different person after one season. Large in part because of the position he's forced into.

Some fans might say that the series is less about Loki and more about the TVA. And while I can unquestionably see their point, I still believe that the TVA is the perfect way for Loki to grow. He's a character all about causing chaos and controlling others, so forcing him to work for an organization that takes that away allows Loki time to really do some introspection. Because if his tricks don't work, and his deceptions can't fool others, then who is he? Well, through this series, we see who he truly is: A character who is alone and is intended to be nothing more than a villain whose only truly selfless act got him killed in the end. Even if he wants to better himself, he can't because that "goes against the sacred timeline." Loki is a person who is destined to fail, and he gets to see it all with his own eyes by looking at what his life was meant to be and by observing what it could have been. It's all tragic and yet another example of these shows proving how they allow underdeveloped characters in the MCU a better chance to shine. Because if Loki can give even more depth to a character who's already compelling as is, then that is a feat worth admiration.

The Score: Let's give our gratitude toward Natalie Holt, who f**king killed it with this series score. Every piece she made is nothing short of glorious. Sylvie's and the TVA's themes particularly stand out, as they perfectly capture who/what they're representing. Such as how Sylvie's is big and boisterous where the TVA's sound eerie and almost unnatural. Holt also finds genius ways to implement other scores into the series, from using familiar tracks from the Thor movies to even rescoring "Ride of the Valkyries" in a way that makes a scene even more epic than it already could have been. The MCU isn't best known for its musical scores, partly because they aim to be suitable rather than memorable. But every now and again, something as spectacular as the Loki soundtrack sprinkles through the cracks of mediocrity. Making fans all the more grateful because of it.

There’s a lot of Talking: To some, this will be considered a complaint. Most fans of the MCU come for the action, comedy, and insanely lovable characters. Not so much for the dialogue and exposition. That being said, I consider all of the talking to be one of Loki's best features. All the background information about the TVA added with the character's backstories fascinates me, making me enthusiastic about learning more. Not everyone else will be as interested in lore and world-building as others, but just because something doesn't grab you, in particular, doesn't mean it isn't appealing at all. Case in point: There's a reason why the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise has lasted as long as it has, and it's not entirely because of how "scary" it is.

There's also the fact that most of the dialogue in Loki is highly engaging. I'll admit, some scenes do drag a bit. However, every line is delivered so well that I'm more likely to hang on to every word when characters simply have honest conversations with each other. And if I can be entertained by Loki talking with Morbius about jetskis, then I know a show is doing at least something right.

It’s Funny: This shouldn't be a surprise. The MCU is well-known for its quippy humor in the direct acknowledgment that it doesn't take itself too seriously. With that said, it is clear which movies and shows are intended to be taken seriously, while others are meant to be comedies. Loki tries to be a bit of both. There are some heavy scenes that impact the characters, and probably even some fans, due to how well-acted and professionally written they can be. However, this is also a series about a Norse god traveling through time to deal with alternate versions of himself, with one of them being an alligator. I'd personally consider it a crime against storytelling to not make it funny. Thankfully, the writers aren't idiots and know to make the series fun with a few flawlessly timed and delivered jokes that never really take away from the few good grim moments that actually work.

It Kept Me Surprised: About everything I appreciate about Loki, the fact that I could never really tell what direction it was going is what I consider its absolute best feature. Every time I think I knew what was going to happen, there was always this one big twist that heavily subverted any and every one of my expectations. Such as how each time I thought I knew who the big bad was in this series, it turns out that there was an even worse threat built up in the background. The best part is that these twists aren't meant for shock value. It's always supposed to drive the story forward, and on a rewatch, you can always tell how the seeds have been planted for making each surprise work. It's good that it kept fans guessing, as being predictable and expected would probably be the worst path to take when making a series about Loki, a character who's all about trickery and deception. So bonus points for being in line with the character.

The TVA: You can complain all you want about how the show is more about the TVA than it is Loki, but you can't deny how the organization in question is a solid addition to the MCU. Initially, it was entertaining to see Loki of all characters be taken aback by how the whole process works. And it was worth a chuckle seeing Infinity Stones, the most powerful objects in the universe, get treated as paperweights. However, as the season continues and we learn about the TVA, the writers show that their intention is to try and write a message about freedom vs. control. We've seen this before in movies like Captain America: The Winter Soldier or Captain America: Civil War, but with those films, it always felt like the writers were leaning more towards one answer instead of making it obscure over which decision is correct. This is why I enjoy the fact that Loki went on saying that there really is no right answer for this scenario. If the TVA doesn't prune variants, it could result in utter chaos and destruction that no one from any timeline can prepare themselves for. But when they do prune variants along with their timelines, it takes away all free will, forcing people to be someone they probably don't even want to be. It's a situation where there really is no middle ground. Even if you bring up how people could erase timelines more destructive than others, that still takes away free will on top of how there's no unbiased way of deciding which timelines are better or worse. And the series found a brilliant way to explain this moral: The season starts by showing how the TVA is necessary, to later point out how there are flaws and evil secrets within it, and ends things with the revelation that there are consequences without the TVA keeping the timeline in check. It's an epic showcase of fantastic ideas met with exquisite execution that I can't help but give my seal of approval to.

Miss Minutes: Not much to say. This was just a cute character, and I love that Tara Strong, one of the most popular voice actors, basically plays a role in the MCU now.

Justifying Avengers: Endgame: Smartest. Decision. This series. Made. Bar none.

Because when you establish that the main plot is about a character getting arrested for f**king over the timeline, you're immediately going to get people questioning, "Why do the Avengers get off scot-free?" So by quickly explaining how their time-traveling antics were supposed to happen, it negates every one of those complaints...or most of them. There are probably still a-holes who are poking holes in that logic, but they're not the ones writing this review, so f**k them.

Mobius: I didn't really expect Owen Wilson to do that good of a job in Loki. Primarily due to how the Cars franchise discredits him as a professional actor for...forever. With that said, Owen Wilson's Mobius might just be one of the most entertaining characters in the series. Yes, even more so than Loki himself. Mobius acts as the perfect straight man to Loki's antics, what with being so familiar with the supposed god of mischief through past variations of him. Because of that, it's always a blast seeing these two bounce off one another through Loki trying to trick a Loki expert, and said expert even deceiving Loki at times. Also, on his own, Mobius is still pretty fun. He has this sort of witty energy that's often present in Phil Coulson (Love that character too, BTW), but thanks to Owen Wilson's quirks in his acting, there's a lot more energy to Mobius than one would find in Coulson. As well as a tad bit of tragedy because of Mobius being a variant and having no clue what his life used to be. It's a lot to unpack and is impressively written, added to how it's Owen Wilson who helps make the character work as well as he did. Cars may not have done much for his career, but Loki sure as hell showed his strengths.

Ravonna Renslayer: Probably the least entertaining character, but definitely one of the most intriguing. At least to me.

Ravonna is a character who is so steadfast in her believes that she refuses to accept that she may be wrong. Without the proper writing, someone like Ravonna could tick off (ha) certain people. Personally, I believe that Ravonna is written well enough where even though I disagree with her belief, I can understand where she's coming from. She's done so much for the TVA, bringing an end to so many variants and timelines that she can't accept that it was all for nothing. In short, Ravonna represents the control side of the freedom vs. control theme that the writers are pushing. Her presence is necessary while still being an appealing character instead of a plot device. Again, at least to me.

Hunter B-15: I have no strong feelings one way or another towards B-15's personality, but I will admit that I love the expectation-subversion done with her. She has this air of someone who's like, "I'm this by-the-books badass cop, and I will only warm up to this cocky rookie after several instances of them proving themselves." That's...technically not B-15. She's the first to see Loki isn't that bad, but only because B-15 is the first in the main cast to learn the hidden vile present in the TVA. It makes her change in point of view more believable than how writers usually work a character like hers, on top of adding a new type of engaging motivation for why she fights. I may not particularly enjoy her personality, but I do love her contributions.

Loki Watching What His Life Could Have Been: This was a brilliant decision by the writers. It's basically having Loki speedrun his own character development through witnessing what he could have gone through and seeing the person he's meant to be, providing a decent explanation for why he decides to work for the TVA. And on the plus side, Tom Hiddleston did a fantastic job at portraying the right emotions the character would have through a moment like this. Such as grief, tearful mirth, and borderline shock and horror. It's a scene that no other character could go through, as no one but Loki needed a wake-up call for who he truly is. This series might heavily focus on the TVA, but scenes like this prove just who's the star of the show.

Loki Causing Mischief in Pompeii: I just really love this scene. It's so chaotic and hilarious, all heavily carried by the fact that you can tell that Tom Hiddleston is having the time of his damn life being this character. What more can I say about it.

Sylvie: The first of many surprises this season offered, and boy was she a great one.

Despite being an alternate version of Loki, I do appreciate that Sylvie's her own character and not just "Loki, but with boobs." She still has the charm and charisma, but she also comes across as more hardened and intelligent when compared to the mischievous prick we've grown to love. A large part of that is due to her backstory, which might just be the most tragic one these movies and shows have ever made. Sylvie got taken away when she was a little girl, losing everything she knew and loved, and it was all for something that the people who arrested her don't even remember. How sad is that? The fact that her life got permanently screwed over, leaving zero impact on the people responsible for it. As badass as it is to hear her say she grew up at the ends of a thousand worlds (that's an album title if I ever heard one), it really is depressing to know what she went through. It also makes her the perfect candidate to represent the freedom side of the freedom vs. control argument. Because she's absolutely going to want to fight to put an end to the people who decide how the lives of trillions should be. Those same people took everything from Sylvie, and if I were in her position, I'd probably do the same thing. Of course, we all know the consequences that come from this, and people might criticize Sylvie the same way they complain about Thor and Star Lord for screwing over the universe in Avengers: Infinity War. But here's the thing: Sylvie's goals are driven by vengeance, which can blind people from any other alternatives. Meaning her killing He Who Remains is less of a story flaw and more of a character flaw. It may be a bad decision, but that's for Season Two Sylvie to figure out. For now, I'll just appreciate the well-written and highly compelling character we got this season and eagerly wait as we see what happens next with her.

The Oneshot in Episode Three: Not as epic as the hallway scene in Daredevil, but I do find it impressive that it tries to combine real effects, fighting, and CGI in a way where it's all convincing enough.

Lady Sif Kicking Loki in the D**k: This is a scene that makes me realize why I love this series. At first, I laugh at Loki being stuck in a time loop where Lady Sif kicks him in the d**k over and over again. But a few scenes later, this setup actually works as a character moment that explains why Loki does the things he does.

This series crafted phenomenal character development through Loki getting kicked in the d**k by the most underrated badass of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It's a perfect balance of comedy and drama that not every story can nail, yet Loki seemed like it did with very little effort.

Classic Loki: This variant shows the true tragedy of being Loki. The only way to survive is to live in isolation, far away from everything and everyone he loves, only to end up having his one good deed result in his death anyways. Classic Loki is definitive proof that no matter what face they have, Lokis never gets happy endings. They're destined to lose, but at least this version knows that if you're going out, you're going out big. And at least he got to go out with a mischievous laugh.

(Plus, the fact that he's wearing Loki's first costume from the comics is a pretty cute callback).

Alligator Loki: Alligator Loki is surprisingly adorable, and if you know me, you know that I can't resist cute s**t. It's not in my nature.

Loki on Loki Violence: If you thought Loki going ham in Pompeii was chaotic, that was nothing to this scene. Because watching these Lokis backstab one another, to full-on murdering each other, is a moment that is best described as pure, unadulterated chaos. And I. Loved. Every. Second of it.

The Opening Logo for the Season Finale: I'm still not that big of a fan of the opening fanfare playing for each episode, but I will admit that it was a cool feature to play vocal clips of famous quotes when the corresponding character appears. It's a great way of showing the chaos of how the "sacred timeline" works without having it to be explained further.

The Citadel: I adore the set design of the Citadel. So much history and backstory shine through the state of every room the characters walk into. You get a perfect picture of what exactly happened, but seeing how ninety percent of the place is in shambles, it's pretty evident that not everything turned out peachy keen. And as a personal note, my favorite aspect of the Citadel is the yellow cracks in the walls. It looks as though reality itself is cracking apart, which is pretty fitting when considering where the Citadel actually is.

He Who Remains: This man. I. Love. This man.

I love this man for two reasons.

A. He's a ton of fun. Credit to that goes to the performance delivered by Jonathon Majors. Not only is it apparent that Majors is having a blast, but he does a great job at conveying how He Who Remains is a strategic individual but is still very much off his rocker. These villains are always my favorite due to how much of a blast it is seeing someone with high intelligence just embracing their own insanity. If you ask me, personalities are always essential for villains. Because even when they have the generic plot to rule everything around them, you're at least going to remember who they are for how entertaining they were. Thankfully He Who Remains has that entertainment value, as it makes me really excited for his eventual return, whether it'd be strictly through Loki Season Two or perhaps future movies.

And B. He Who Remains is a fantastic foil for Loki. He Who Remains is everything Loki wishes he could have been, causing so much death, destruction, and chaos to the multiverse. The important factor is that he does it all through order and control. The one thing Loki despises, and He Who Remains uses it to his advantage. I feel like that's what makes him the perfect antagonist to Loki, thanks to him winning the game by not playing it. I would love it if He Who Remains makes further appearances in future movies and shows, especially given how he's hinted to be Kane the Conqueror, but if he's only the main antagonist in Loki, I'm still all for it. He was a great character in his short time on screen, and I can't wait to see what happens next with him.

WHAT I DISLIKED

Revealing that Loki was D.B. Cooper: A cute scene, but it's really unnecessary. It adds nothing to the plot, and I feel like if it was cut out entirely, it wouldn't have been the end of the world...Yeah. That's it.

That's my one and only complaint about this season.

Maybe some scenes drag a bit, and I guess Episode Three is kind of the weakest, but there's not really anything that this series does poorly that warrants an in-depth complaint.

Nope.

Nothing at all...

…

...

...I'm not touching that "controversy" of Loki falling for Sylvie instead of Mobius. That's a situation where there are no winners.

Only losers.

Exclusively losers.

Other than that, this season was amazing!

IN CONCLUSION

I'd give the first season of Loki a well-earned A, with a 9.5 through my usual MCU ranking system. It turns out, it really is the best type of wackiness that was just too good to fail. The characters are fun and likable, the comedy and drama worked excellently, and the expansive world-building made me really intrigued with the more we learned. It's hard to say if Season Two will keep this momentum, but that's for the future to figure out. For now, let's just sit back and enjoy the chaos.

(Now, if you don't excuse me, I have to figure out how to review Marvel's What If...)

#marvel cinematic universe #mcu reviews #loki tv series #loki #sylvie #mobius #ravonna renslayer #hunter b 15 #classic loki #alligator loki #he who remains #kang the conqueror #what i thought about

[hotchley]

mortch having a girl, specifically hotch coming home after a bad case to see derek-with glasses ofc- holding their babygirl while reading hotch’s high school play script

Grace I am in love with your brain and I need you to write this properly, but for now, enjoy this little drabble... thing whatever, we’re going with it (and I hope you liked the other mortch headcanons!!) 

the best thing they ever did

I don’t know what else to call it and all of the songs I’ve been listening to are sad and look... either of them with a daughter is just the best thing and yeah so please be gentle

Also where in canon is this? Fuck if I know, Tara and Luke are on the team but Derek left and Jack is a teen and Hotch is retiring in a few months and like Mr Scratch the episode did happen but not the shit after?? but that’s not that important just go with it 

read on ao3! (I cannot believe I am doing this)

tw: vague crimes against children, the slightest implication of child abuse

Cases with children were always hard. But cases with children, when he had two at home and Derek wasn’t there to ground him or make everything better by simply holding his hand and drawing circles were awful.

So awful that he just wanted to bury his head in the lumpy pillow at the hotel and scream. He missed feeling Derek’s arms around him as he slept, and he missed falling asleep on his shoulder, and he missed the scent of his shower gel.

He just missed Derek. And Jack. And their little girl. He couldn’t believe he had a daughter. He had always wanted to give Jack a little sibling, but his own failures had meant that never happened.

Until it did. Just in a completely different way to what he was expecting. He lost Haley to George Foyet, yes, but he gained a new family that he thought he would never find. And he knew Haley, wherever she was, was at peace, watching over him and the loves of his life with pride and happiness.

In the end, they saved the children. Their lives would never be the same and this would stay with them forever, but they would, with the right support, recover and flourish.

He used to tell the team that saving a victim was the best thing they could do because he needed them to carry on having faith in what they did and not start doubting whether or not they made a difference because they did.

But he too had wondered whether or not it was worth it. When he thought of everything Foyet had put him through, had his life really been worth saving?

And then he saw Jack. Jack who would always miss his mother and the person she had been to him, the woman he remembered, but Jack that looked at Derek and called him Papa without feeling guilty. Jack that sometimes got angry and threw tantrums but was every bit the boy Haley had raised.

And he knew that it was all worth it. As he thought of Derek- good and kind and beautiful Derek that had stuck with him through everything and held him after Mr Scratch had forced him to see his family die- he smiled. 

Derek Morgan was the best man he knew. And every single day, every single moment, he considered himself lucky to call him his husband. He knew how difficult it was for Derek to wave goodbye each morning, knowing first-hand the horrors of the job. But Aaron only had to do a few more months before the Bureau would give him his pension.

And when that day came, he was going to retire and join Derek at the local community college, where they would teach the next generation of lawyers. Together. Like they were meant to. Because even before they had fallen in love- unwillingly and resentfully realised that actually, they did care about each other a lot- they had been partners.

But before then, he would carry on with the BAU, writing reports until his eyes started to hurt and he has to fight back tears every time he looks at the photos. This time though, his desk was suspiciously void of paperwork that wasn’t absolutely essential to the case.

When he looked into the bullpen, Emily and Luke’s piles seemed significantly bigger. Tara and Spencer also had larger piles, but those were decreasing at an incredibly fast rate. 

He smiled to himself and pulled his phone out to text Derek that he would be home sooner than expected. But as he gazed at his lock screen- subconsciously counting down the days till he could change it to the family photo- he decided he would surprise them instead.

With the knowledge that he would soon be home and in the arms of his loved one, the paperwork was slightly more bearable. It was still brutal and heartbreaking and he kept needing to pause to stop himself from sobbing, but there was a light at the end of the tunnel.

Derek’s presence had always been more than a light, but still.

He finished before anyone else of the team, but he didn’t feel guilty leaving. They didn’t need him to hold their hands anymore. They hadn’t for a while, but Derek’s departure after the birth of their daughter- their beautiful daughter- had driven the point home.

It was why he was going to be able to leave without any regrets.

It was dark when he unlocked the front door to their home. Home. He thought he had lost that after Haley left. He never thought he would find it in Derek, but he would never stop feeling grateful that he got a second chance at a family. A second chance at being happy.

All the lights downstairs were off, so he assumed they had all gone to sleep. He checked Jack’s room and saw that he was peacefully asleep. Maybe it was the case, or the nostalgia that came with leaving, or maybe he was just a better man than his father was, but the sight of him sleeping without stirring or being haunted by nightmares bought on a wave of emotion so overwhelming he had to hold the door handle.

With every passing day, Jack looked more and more like his mother. Once upon a time, it would’ve been like a dagger to Aaron’s heart, but now it just made him smile with a fondness he hadn’t realised he was capable of.

Even though Jack wasn’t a child anymore- he was almost as tall as Hotch- he still found himself quietly entering to press a soft kiss to his forehead. He closed the door properly as he left, knowing his son would appreciate the thought in the morning.

The door to the nursery was also closed. Either she was sleeping, or Derek was still awake with her. He wouldn’t be surprised if it was the second. Derek loved their daughter the way he did everything in his life: with passion, the utmost care and his entire soul.

He hesitated in the doorway of their bedroom, wanting to enjoy the sight for just a moment.

Derek, in nothing but a thin t-shirt and pair of shorts, clearly ready for bed, and glasses that he somewhat resented wearing because it reminded him that he was getting older, holding their daughter in his arms. He held her like she was the world.

And in some ways, she was.

Aaron smiled at the two of them. And then he heard what Derek was saying.

The book in front of him was not the storybook Haley had bought Jack when he was a baby. Nor was it one of the many gifts they’d received from the team.

It was the script for the Pirates of Penzance. The same one Hotch had scribbled his notes all over, so he would know exactly where he was meant to stand and when he was meant to enter and leave. He wanted to be offended, but he couldn’t help but smile.

Theatre had been the start of his and Haley’s love story. He loved that Derek was so willing to celebrate it.

“I hope you’re doing the voices right,” he quipped, as Derek started to recite the first of Pirate Number Four’s two lines.

Derek turned and Aaron was still so taken aback by how stunning he was that whatever he was going to say died on his lips. He smiled slightly, trying to not give away how much the case had affected him.

“I thought you could use something good today. Em told me what happened. Do you want to talk about it?”

Not today. Tomorrow he would, but tonight he was going to love his daughter and fall asleep in Derek’s arms. So he shook his head and went over to the two of them.

His daughter babbled and smiled at him, wrapping her little hand around his finger.

“Hello darling,” he cooed. “Did Papa make you stay up for me? Or did you do that yourself?”

Derek laughed, a joyous and warming sound. “She did that herself. In fact, she almost woke Jack up with her screaming. I think she knew her daddy would be home today. Didn’t you?”

Aaron smiled as she carried on smiling at the two of them. “Thank you for staying up. I know I’m back earlier than usual, but it’s still late.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Derek said, still rocking the baby in his arms. She was a beautiful baby. And one day, she would be an amazing, strong and vulnerable woman. But for now, she was his little girl.

“I know. But I want to,” Aaron said in response. “Did she really almost wake up Jack?”

“Yep. She wanted to be held, and then I thought I would read to her, and I remember getting this out for Jack earlier. It just felt right. Haley had so many lines, how she remembered all of them is beyond me.”

“She was ethereal on that stage,” he said. But thinking of Haley didn’t hurt now. It hadn’t for a while. JJ had been right. He was happy.

“I’m going to change out of this suit,” he said, after a few moments of silence passed. Derek nodded, not even moving to put her back in her crib. When Aaron returned wearing Derek’s old pyjamas, he was still rocking her gently.

“You’ve never looked quite so beautiful as you do when you hold her,” he confessed quietly.

Derek smiled, passing her over. “And you never look as relaxed as you do when she’s in your arms.”

He laughed, then responded with: “Gas.”

Derek rolled his eyes in that fond way he always did, but he laughed along nonetheless. And when Aaron’s eyes started to droop, he took the now sleeping baby from his arms and went to the nursey.

As he set her down, he brushed his lips across her forehead, wishing her a peaceful sleep. 

“Goodnight, Penelope Haley Hotchner-Morgan. Have the sweetest dreams,” he said, leaving the door slightly open so some of the light could get in.

Aaron had fallen asleep in the few minutes he had been gone for, on top of the duvet and with his feet dangling off the end of the bed. Derek smiled at his sleeping figure from the door, wondering how anyone could look so sweet as they slept.

Derek moved him to be under the covers, having done it enough times to know how to do it without waking him up. When Aaron’s breathing remained even, he breathed a sigh of relief and climbed in on the other side.

As if he just knew, Aaron rolled over, burying his head in Derek’s neck as he wrapped his arms around his husband, feeling like home was perfect once more.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fic #mortch #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #tw implied child abuse #tw implied crimes against children

[skullhaver]

It's 2021, and I'm watching Buffy for the first time.

The Virgil on my Buffy journey is my long-distance girlfriend, who has loved the show for years. We just finished season 4, and I wanted to write about my favorite episodes so far. I suspect some of my faves are beloved by most fans, but others are weird, personal picks. Buffy fandom, please don't come for me.

I thought this post would be short but I was wrong.

Hono(u)rable Mentions: "Band Candy" S3E6 and "Halloween" S2E6

Both these episodes have fun premises where the Scoobies run around Sunnydale after it was upended by zany, chaotic dark forces. "Band Candy" is fun for devil-may-care teen Giles. "Halloween" is fun for 18th-century-ditz Buffy. These are both very good, and are the sorts of episode I can imagine happily rewatching in the future. I just have more to pontificate upon for the other episodes on this list.

10. "Ted" S2E11

I can’t say I enjoyed this episode, but it did take me for a wild ride. Probably nobody else has strong feelings about this weird story where Buffy's mom dates a stereotypical cheesy family man, who turns out to be a controlling abuser, who turns out to be a robot. I remember shouting at the screen, "Did Buffy just kill a human man?? Is it okay in the moral logic of this show for Buffy to kill a human if he's a direct physical threat to her??" I knew Buffy would have deeper stories than the monster of the week formula we'd seen so far, but this early in season 2, I had no idea when or how that would happen. This was the episode that finally taught me that Buffy is largely not interested in moral ambiguity, or in exploring what it means to be good or bad. Except for season-defining exceptions like Faith and Angel, evil characters are simplistically, essentially evil. But it was wild to believe for a moment that Buffy murdered her mom's abusive boyfriend and would have to live with the consequences.

9. "Helpless" S3E12

When Buffy tries to be genuinely scary, it succeeds with aplomb. The premise of this episode is dumb and contrived ("Giles has to remove Buffy's powers without her knowledge for a seeeecret test by the Watcher's Council") but the chase and fight in this episode are some of the most tense and spooky scenes of the whole series so far. Buffy's vulnerability makes the stakes feel real in a way few other episodes manage. And Buffy's victory is all the more satisfying because she can't punch her way out of this problem, she has to be smart and creative. The fridge horror, of course, is that Giles would endanger her like this in the first place, but that gets sorted out over the emotional arc of the next few episodes.

8. "I Only Have Eyes For You." S2E19

Another spooky episode, this one a classic ghost story of forbidden love ending in murder - but with the twist that the ghosts possess people's bodies to have them reenact their final moments. I love stories about breaking a doomed-to-repeat cycle. I love weird shit like the snakes manifesting in the cafeteria. And I really loved the choice to have Buffy and Angel come to understand their feelings about their own relationship by embodying these ghosts - especially how they embodied different genders than their own to better fit the "roles" of the haunting story, thus subverting the expected pattern. I found this episode clever, poignant, and effective.

7. "Who Are You?" S4E16

"Faith and Buffy switch bodies" is a wild premise, but the real joy of "Who Are You?" is watching Sarah Michelle Geller being an extremely talented actress for 45 minutes, portraying a totally different character. Watching Faith confronted by kindness and love from Buffy's mom, Riley, and her friends, then getting launched into an existential crisis over it is so great. Also, I just dig a good church fight.

6. "Hush" S4E10

As stated above, love an episode that reminds me that these people are talented actors! Featuring demons that render all of Sunnydale unable to talk, we get to watch great physical comedy right next to tense, silent fight scenes. The visual creepiness of the Gentleman and their straight-jacketed weird little helpers is hard to beat. "Hush" is such a clever episode that it ascends monster of the week status to become almost Twilight Zone-esque. Also, for the first time, Buffy sees Riley doing his Initiative thing, and Riley sees Buffy being the Slayer, but they can't talk about it?? That's good shit.

5. "The Wish" S3E9

Both "Something Blue" and "The Wish" feel like the writers decided to use fanfic premises on their own show... so obviously I like them a lot. But getting to watch a dark timeline AU with interesting world-building and attention to detail, a hilarious and horrifying Cordelia POV, AND a smirking kinky vampire Willow? Hello?? And the fact that the Wishverse comes up again in "Doppelgänger" (another truly fun episode) only improves my opinion. I imagine this is the kind of episode fans simply love coming back to.

4. "Restless" S4E22

This David Lynch-ass dream sequence was a weird choice for a season finale, but an extremely ambitious and cool episode. I should say up front that I love David Lynch-ass dream shit. There were creative and well-executed scene transitions as characters moved seamlessly from one dream room into another. Several memorably neat shots - Willow running between endless curtains as she tries to get onstage, Buffy alone in a vast desert with a weirdly high camera angle. And I got myself all excited thinking that the First Slayer would maybe become a different kind of antagonist - maybe not even fully revealed in this episode, or maybe an Id-like aspect of Buffy herself. But I forgot Whedon gonna Whedon, so the First Slayer had to be someone Buffy could punch in the end. And the First Slayer is sadly yet another primitive-themed, emotionally-stunted character of color for this show. Most of her lines in this episode are literally voiced by a white woman speaking for her, and of all the dumb quips to make, Buffy had a line about her hair being unprofessional? Also, I'm a lesbian, so the fact that the most explicit act of intimacy between Willow and Tara this show has allowed us to see occurs in Xander's horny dream sequence... it’s unforgivable, Joss. This episode was one of my favorites ever, deeply marred by some bad writing choices.

3. "Lovers Walk" S3E8

Spike, perhaps the best non-Willow character in this show, is back in Sunnydale, a hilariously heartbroken mess of a man, hell-bent on getting his former girlfriend Drusilla back. (Drusilla left him for a fungus demon.) So Spike breaks into a magic shop to get ingredients for a love spell, where he runs into Willow, who is getting ingredients for a de-lusting spell, because she is worried she and Xander will be too thirsty to behave appropriately in public with their actual partners, Oz and Cordelia. This is a hilarious moment just to exist. This is all the episode needed to do to satisfy me. But the fact that Spike then kidnaps Willow, and it ends with tragic stakes of everyone's relationships coming apart, not to mention me genuinely thinking Cordelia was dead for a minute there - wow. Chef’s kiss. The episode is balanced shockingly well between Spike being an ominous villain, and being the sort of lovable semi-evil (more gremlin-like) side character he'll become in season 4. What a wild ride.

2. "Graduation Day" S3E21-22

I'm counting this two part season finale as one because it's my list and I'll do what I want. "Graduation Day" feels like a quintessential Buffy episode executed to perfection. It has Buffy reaffirming her position as a moral heroine, sacrificing her own blood to save Angel's life even when she thought she had to kill Faith to save him. It has Buffy and Faith (or Buffy/Faith, as I prefer to think of them) getting to square off in a dramatic, tough fight. It has a lot of Mayor Wilkins, a character I truly adore for some reason. Nothing like a public administrator who plays mini golf in his office, wants you to chew with your mouth closed, and will kill a graduating class of high schoolers to gain immortality. The catharsis of the whole school getting to fight back against evil, instead of just Buffy against the world - a real joy. This episode misses the top spot for two reasons. "A special vampire poison and the only cure is the blood of a Slayer" is too contrived for me to let slide, and also I had to see Cordelia and Wesley kiss.

1. "Becoming" S2E21-22

Buffy’s season finales really do have good stories and satisfying payoff. First off, Buffy starts this episode by punching a cop and fleeing from the law. Later, Spike also punches a cop. A.k.a., Buffy said blue lives don't matter. Second - I haven't gotten a chance to comment on this yet, but all throughout season 2, evil Angel is such a joy to watch. As regular Angel, David Boreanaz makes exactly one face ("I am a kicked, angsty puppy") and bless his heart, it gets so tiresome. As evil Angel, he is so expressive, dynamic and terrifyingly creative in his badness. And I love his weird threesome energy with Spike and Drusilla. But also, it's so hard to watch Buffy suffer as she deals with her evil boyfriend doing evil things. Her ultimate choice in this episode, to kill Angel even as Willow's spell restores his soul, gave me some real big feels! Also, this episode marks the first moment of Willow doing big, plot-shifting magic on her own, solidifying her transformation from computer nerd to witch! 

Also, shout-out to the many good smaller moments in this episode: Spike making awkward small talk with Buffy's mom, Buffy constantly dunking on Principle Snyder, and Giles being tortured by visions of Miss Calendar (RIP Miss Calendar, I was your biggest fan.)

"Becoming" is an excellent season finale and the kind of Buffy episode I imagine I will want to re-watch in the future just for nostalgia's sake.

#buffy the vampire slayer #guess i will tag this and just engage in pvp if it happens #buffy fandom in 2021 i don't know you but please be nice #this was fun to write #i guess i do like this show!

[terramythos]

TerraMythos 2021 Reading Challenge - Book 4 of 26

Title: Educated (2018)

Author: Tara Westover

Genre/Tags: Nonfiction, Creative Nonfiction, Memoir, Autobiography, First-Person

Rating: 8/10

Date Began: 1/21/2021

Date Finished: 1/28/2021

Tara Westover was born into an isolated, fundamentalist, conservative, anti-Government family in rural Idaho. She lived a life of neglect and abuse, never going to the doctor and never receiving a formal education, while being forced into unsafe and life threatening working conditions. When one of her older brothers became violently abusive, no one stopped him.

However, things began to change when Tara self-studied the ACT and scored high enough to be admitted to college. At age seventeen, she stepped into a classroom for the first time, and soon found just how little she knew about the world at large. Westover's Educated is a deep dive into her experiences growing up, her emotional struggles with an abusive family, and her road to recovery.

To admit uncertainty is to admit to weakness, to powerlessness, and to believe in yourself despite both. It is a frailty, but in this frailty there is a strength: the conviction to live in your own mind, not someone else’s. I have often wondered if the most powerful words I wrote that night came not from anger or rage, but from doubt: I don’t know. I just don’t know. 

Not knowing for certain, but refusing to give way to those who claim certainty, was a privilege I had never allowed myself. My life was narrated for me by others. Their voices were forceful, emphatic, absolute. It had never occurred to me that my voice might be as strong as theirs. 

Full review and content warning(s) under the cut.

Content warnings for the book: Graphic depictions of childhood neglect and domestic abuse. Graphic depictions of severe, traumatic injury. Derogatory use of racial slurs. Racism, misogyny, and antisemitism are discussed. Somewhat graphic animal death.  

I don't have a lot of experience with nonfiction outside an academic setting, so writing a review about a nonfiction book, even one that's basically a story, is challenging for me. I've written and rewritten my Educated review a few times and none of them have felt right. So I'm going to keep things as short and simple as I can.

I've got complicated feelings about memoirs. Autobiographical works can be fascinating to read! But since I don't care about the personal lives of celebrities or politicians, most of the genre is dead to me. Memoirs like Educated are much more interesting; stories about ordinary people living through extraordinary circumstances. But there have been enough bad actors with this type of book (like Three Cups of Tea or A Million Little Pieces) that I'm always a little skeptical. So I approached Educated with a cautious yet open mind.

Educated is a thought-provoking memoir for a number of reasons, as it explores both the dynamics of familial abuse and the importance of receiving an education. Westover clearly experienced profound trauma as a kid. Apart from multiple disturbing injuries, she also suffered physical and emotional abuse, medical neglect, and a total lack of typical social and academic education, all of which hindered her ability to function as a normal adult. Despite this, she's managed to accomplish a lot, especially in terms of formal education, which her memoir details.

However, I think most official descriptions for the book do it a disservice. Yes, Westover was born to survivalist parents, and yes, she did not enter a classroom until seventeen. On a surface level the book is about her journey through education. But as Westover states, most of that education was social and emotional. A lot of the book actually focuses on her relationship with her family, and coming to terms with the abuse and residual emotional damage from her childhood.

As a survivor, I really identified with Westover's difficult journey with the abuse she suffered. While my own story is not as extreme, I was also abused as a child by family members. My father witnessed it happen and refused to intervene, gaslighting me and my mother + sister the entire time. There is so much irrationality and manipulation in a situation like that, and reading about her parents' denial that her brother Shawn was ever abusive struck very close to home. Like Westover, it took me a long time-- well into adulthood-- to finally establish boundaries and cut my father out of my life. Her emotional struggle and recovery are especially poignant to someone who knows on some level what it's like.

The academic portion of the book is also interesting. Westover's shock, frustration, and sometimes ostracization for not knowing certain things is just fascinating. It floored me that she had no knowledge of the Holocaust or Civil Rights Movement until college. While I have plenty of criticism for the US education system, it's better than starting with absolutely nothing. Educated made me realize just how much of my accessibility to formal education I've taken for granted.

I admit I actually finished the book a little skeptical, because there were some details that seemed weird or not adequately explained. Memoirs and other works of creative nonfiction inhabit a gray area in terms of truth. On one hand, they have to be entertaining to read about. But on the other, reality isn't always entertaining-- so embellishment does happen. One also has to consider how unreliable human memory can be, which blurs the line between fact and fiction further. 

On previous versions of this review I obsessed over financials, or how people recovered from injuries, and so on. Honestly, though, I'm not sure how much the small details matter in a story like this. Westover acknowledges several times where she remembers things differently than others. Memory, and how it changes with time and context, is a central theme of the book. I'll never know Westover's full story because I'm not her. 

But even if only half her story is 100% factually true-- and I think it’s way more than that-- it's still super interesting and discusses some very important topics. Westover comes off as genuine, and she describes her struggles in a very believable way, often going into detail that I'm not sure someone would even think to make up. I think it's nice she doesn't use her achievements as a form of self-aggrandizement. And while Westover accomplished some amazing things considering her background, the book also doesn't come off as a preachy bootstraps narrative. Maybe in five years there will be a huge scandal over this book, but as of now I'm willing to believe it for the most part. 

Educated gets an 8 because while I found it fascinating, it wasn't a life changing piece of work to me. A lot of people feel more strongly about it. Nonfiction also doesn't scratch the same itch for me as, say, really good spec fic. But I'm glad I read it, and I think it's a good thing to read outside one's comfort zone sometimes.  

#8/10 #taylor reads #2021 reading challenge

[thatiranianphantom]

Riverdale, Buffy, and the Musical Episode, an analysis.

Hey all! I have spent far too long writing out my thoughts on Riverdale vs. Buffy’s musical episode, from the perspective of a theatre nerd. Thoughts are welcomed!

To those who aren’t aware, I, your humble author, am a massive musical nerd. I have ALL the musical memorabilia, Broadway and the West End are places I’ve visited many times, my favorite genre of music by far is musical theatre, and I am just a musical nerd in all senses of the word. 

Which leads to a...perhaps more sharp criticism when a medium like TV attempts to dive into the world of musical theatre.

(Also, full disclosure, while I enjoy the music of Carrie, Heathers, and certainly Buffy’s musical episode, the music of Hedwig just...don’t work for me. It’s not bad music, it’s not a bad show, it’s just not my thing.) 

In this short analysis, I’m going to attempt to explain why Riverdale’s musical episodes fail, and why it IS possible to successfully mount a great musical episode on TV, by way of example, Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s episode “Once More, With Feeling”. 

First, a short recap of both shows’ musical episodes. 

Currently, Riverdale has three musical episodes. These are all jukebox shows (performing pre-written and pre-performed songs), based on three popular musicals. They first did Carrie the Musical, then Heathers, then Hedwig and the Angry Inch. As to this point, all of them have occurred in a diegetic setting - that is, the characters were aware that the songs were being performed. Carrie and Heathers were explained as being the school musical of the year, and Hedwig was ostensibly performed to prove a point, and to support a student struggling with his own identity. 

Buffy’s one musical episode was in season six, arguably one of the darkest seasons Buffy ever had. It is also a diegetic musical, but not a jukebox musical. It features original songs, written by show creator Joss Whedon. The songs are given explanations and each one is written specifically to fit a character.

To sum it very basically, Buffy’s musical episode is much, much better. It is the first episode I would recommend if you were ever in the market for a musical episode, and it takes itself very seriously, while occurring in a very unrealistic setting. 

At the point Carrie occurs in Riverdale, the characters are dealing with a serial killer known as the Black Hood, who ends up murdering their friend and cast member by the end of the musical, on stage. Of the three musical episodes, you could make a pretty strong argument that the first two musicals tie themselves into the plot best. The role of Carrie’s mother is given to Alice Cooper, because she is also struggling with family issues. Purportedly, the song “Unsuspecting Hearts” is used to make up between two characters, as is “You Shine”. 

Buffy’s musical episode occurs at a time where the characters are all struggling with big secrets that they don’t feel able to tell. It’s driving a wedge between all of them, and there’s a large undercurrent of tension. Buffy can’t tell her friends about the depression she’s struggling with, Willow is becoming dangerously addicted to magic, which has caused her to cast two spells, erasing a memory of a fight from her girlfriend Tara’s mind. Spike is in love with Buffy, but is very much wrestling with what that means. Giles has made plans to leave, because he feels like he is hindering Buffy’s growth. Anya and Xander are having serious doubts about their upcoming marriage. The tension created by all these boils under the surface, but nobody plans to say anything. 

The catalyst for this episode occurs in the form of an unnamed demon, who is accidentally summoned and whose primary power is to make people sing and dance - until they can’t stop, and they burn up. It adds a note of risk to the episode. They are being forced into this, and the stakes are high if they don’t comply. 

And so, one by one, all the characters are forced to express their deepest secrets through song, and the demon leaves them to deal with the fallout. It did what Riverdale, fundamentally, has never managed to do: the songs force the plotline foreward. 

That would have been impossible without the songs. The characters are unwilling to open up to each other, and they feel unable to express themselves, until the demon literally musically forces them to do so. At the end of the episode, their biggest secret, the secret that will inform the rest of the season, is revealed: Buffy’s friends didn’t pull her out of Hell, they pulled her out of heaven, where she was at peace, and now the world around her is bright and violent and she is miserable. That revelation will literally carry us to the season finale. 

Riverdale’s musical episodes are, in a way, explained as above. High schools do musicals. It happens. But all of our main cast, and all in the lead roles? Not likely. And that explanation is made even thinner in the latest musical episode, where characters burst into song at random, like Betty and Jughead’s fight in the bunker, or Kevin and the girls breaking into “Wig in a Box” during a sleepover. 

The issue becomes very contrasting between the two musicals: Buffy builds their world around the songs. The songs are crucial to the plot. The episode wouldn’t work if these specific songs were not given to these specific characters. 

Riverdale, however, bases the songs around the plot, and the result is a very odd episode with songs shoehorned in. They aren’t necessary, they’re just...there. Buffy crafts a plot around the songs. Tara finds the flower Willow used in a previous episode to wipe her mind of a fight, and we can see the song naturally build off that. Tara sings Under Your Spell, which is meaningful because she is quite literally under Willow’s spell. Toni is shoehorned into the Heathers musical to be a choreographer, despite there being no previous indication of any experience with choreography, because they need to get her into the room to sing Candy Store, because Heathers features this song, which means they have to. 

The Riverdale musicals take none of the plot of their source materials, which strips the very songs they struggle to add in of all their context and meaning. For example, Hedwig is a show which features a domestic violence plotline as one of its main arcs. Hedwig herself is a pretty terrible person. You would never know that from watching the episode. Heathers’ entire premise talks about how it’s very easy to influence someone into cruelty to the very people who were kind to them, and how quickly a lie can spiral out of control. None of that features in the Heathers Riverdale episode. These songs are powerful because of the context that surrounds them, and that is just...gone. Hedwig’s final song (Midnight Radio) exists in universe as a song where Hedwig finds emotional catharsis and hands her stage off to someone else. It’s exceptionally meaningful, because the whole musical has been a journey to this point. None of that poignancy is able to be translated to Riverdale. 

In contrast, Buffy’s final song (Where Do We Go From Here) feels very earned because it feels like the end of a journey for the characters. All their secrets are exposed, and you can feel the ramifications that will last for a long time after this. And that’s not even mentioning Buffy’s solo Something To Sing About, where she is literally begging for something to make her feel more alive. This only works if Buffy is singing it. The song is designed around her, and it is where she admits her biggest secret. The song is necessary, it is crucial. NONE of the songs in the Riverdale musical episodes have this same power. 

(ALSO, RE: RIVERDALE HEATHERS,  J.D. IS ONE OF HEATHERS MAIN CHARACTERS, I WAS SO EXCITED TO HAVE SWEET PEA PLAYING HIM, AND NONE OF J.D.’S SONGS WERE GIVEN TO SWEET PEA. INJUSTICE. ALSO ALSO, THIS LINE:

Reggie: Just two single straight dudes doing some theatre.

OH SWEET REGGIE. NOBODY HAS TOLD YOU ABOUT KURT AND RAM HAVE THEY DARLING?) 

It should be noted that Riverdale’s songs in all three musicals are heavily reworked to fit the characters, and the TV network rating, better. 

Music has meaning. The songs should be there to do something, not just have extra content to churn out and look good doing it. As stated, Riverdale’s musical episodes aren’t necessary. There are no stakes to their expression through song. 

Fundamentally, Buffy understands what a musical episode is. They do only one, and that was a fight to get on the network as it was.

Think of it this way: did the songs affect the characters and plotline enough that it would still have ramifications a few episodes later? 

Buffy’s certainly did. 

One could theoretically say Midge’s death affected Riverdale, which did occur during the episode. One could also say that Betty and Jughead burning the trailer affected Riverdale. But those didn’t need the songs to exist. Again, they were just….there. 

And then there’s the issue of vocal performance. 

Look, musicals are a lot of work, and it’s hard on the voice. 

Buffy’s cast does feature several singers. Notably, Anthony Stewart Head, Amber Benson and James Marsters have had separate success in music outside of Buffy. 

Riverdale’s cast features a grand total of one person with professional musical experience (that would be Casey Cott, who makes that fact entirely obvious). I suppose KJ Apa counts too, so let’s say two to be generous. 

But again, Buffy wins this round. Make no mistake, their songs are autotuned. Just about every piece of music you’ve heard since the 80s has had some amount of autotune applied to it. Sarah Michelle Gellar would probably be the first to admit, she is not a singer. Actually, up until she received the music, she was fully planning on being dubbed, and is openly says she is not comfortable singing. And you can tell. In the musical, she sounds fine. She’s not amazing. That’s actually the point. She sings well enough to fully communicate the emotions she’s feeling, but it feels genuine. You can believe Buffy is actually singing, not in that full voiced, broadway quality voice that so many Riverdale episodes feature, but in a normal-person singing voice, the voice we all use when we sing in the shower. Willow is not a great singer, and Alyson Hannigan is clearly not comfortable singing either. Accordingly, she’s given the fairly meta line “I think this line’s mostly filler”, and it doesn’t sound heavily autotuned. It’s a normal person voice. 

In contrast, Riverdale’s voices are mostly a machine. I’d kill to listen to the raw tracks, but they are practically waterboarded with autotune. One can scarcely distinguish a real voice in there. They don’t sound like real people, they sound like professionally polished singers. And how many high schools have full choruses of broadway quality singers? It takes you out of the show. I actually would have liked Riverdale’s musical episodes far better, had they let them use their more natural voices. It would have sounded less polished, sure, but it also would have sounded more real. Lili Reinhart has a pretty voice naturally. I would have loved to see that being allowed to exist in these episodes. 

(On a slightly separate note, Casey Cott is very clearly a singer. His voice is full, trained and controlled. It stands out above everyone’s in every musical episode).

In summation, musical episodes are becoming more and more common, but that doesn’t mean they’re easy to do well. However, if you understand the meaning you have to imbue music with on a medium like TV, and craft your context around the singing, it can work. 

And if you’re looking for a musical episode, for god sakes, watch Once More With Feeling. 

#Riverdale #Buffy the Vampire Slayer #BtVS #Buffy Summers #Willow Rosenberg #Xander Harris #Anya Jenkins #Rupert Giles #Dawn Summers #Spike #Spike btvs #Tara Maclay #Betty Cooper #Jughead Jones #Archie Andrews #Veronica Lodge #Cheryl Blossom #Toni Topaz #Reggie Mantle #This is a niche market people #But as your humble musical nerd #I have THOUGHTS

[golbrocklovely]

the chosen daughter // colby brock - chapter fifteen

A/N: first off, i just wanna say i’m sorry for this taking so long. i’ve just been really busy with work and also i haven’t been feeling motivated to get it done. but hopefully the length of this makes up for how long i haven’t update haha anyway, thank you for all the continued love on this story. i appreciate you all so much. please lmk what you think and enjoy !!

story description

taglist: @far-to-many-bands , @idfk-tbh-oops , @muted-mayham , @ughwhyislifesohard , @justtanerd , @ashyoungxblood ,  @cmburgos

trigger warning: slight gore, vampire powers, control/manipulation, cursing, drinking, club scene, brief mentions of fighting

word count: 4043

~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the past three days, the Trapp Haus has been at full capacity; both the club and the apartment. Ever since news of Rinaldi being in town, everyone has been trying to remain close to home base, not wanting to go out. However, other vampires are living it up, unbeknownst to them an elder was stalking the streets.

Personally, I didn't mind being stuck in the Trapp Haus, now that me and Colby were... a thing? I'm not entirely sure what we are, since we've literally only been together for four days, but I will happily keep this thing going if it means I get to make out with him anytime I want to.

And trust me, I do.

Colby has also made it impossible for me to leave, and if I really have to go anywhere, he is next to me the whole time. He's over-protective, but I would be too if an elder that literally massacred his own kind was in L.A.

Mike and Kevin told us it was silent from their sources, no one had seen Rinaldi out yet. Apparently, he had done something like this before. He came to L.A. five years ago and stayed for a while, coming to Bloody and buying at the whole VIP section just so he could watch the club. It was strange to say the least, but Mike and Kevin were confident that he was going to do that again. Everyone was hopeful that he was staying far away from the Trapp Haus.

But then, Kevin got the call.

"Rinaldi wants to buy out our whole VIP section." Kevin gulped.

Mike hissed. "Fuck, he's coming here."

When we found out, it was determined that Sam, Jake, and I would stay in the apartment, since humans were not allowed to be in the Trapp Haus the night Rinaldi was coming. However, last minute, Rinaldi called and stated that humans were allowed to be in the club, and he mentioned to invite all of Kevin's friends because he wanted to meet them.

So, the plan changed.

Kevin told us that he sectioned a small area off for us behind the stage where the DJ booth was, that way we could stay out of view from Rinaldi. Kevin had planned to tend to Rinaldi's needs the whole night while we all stayed in the club.

And that's where we were now: all awkwardly squished behind the stage, sipping drinks and remaining weirdly quiet. Colby kept me close, both of his arms around me as I sat on his lap. If I wanted to stand, he would press me against him, his grip tight. His faced remained tense, almost like he was focusing on something. His mouth was in a permanent frown, his eyes remaining forward.

"You know if you keep scrunching your face like that, you're gonna get wrinkles." I joked, my mouth against his ear.

"Maybe I won't look like a twelve-year-old then." Colby monotoned.

I snickered. “You don't have to hold me the whole time Rinaldi is here.”

“Yes, I do. You have a knack for getting yourself into dangerous situations, and he is a major one.” Colby pressed his lips to the hollow of my neck. “And besides, I like having you close to me.”

Kevin swung around the corner hastily, almost scaring me. "Mike, Colby, can you guys help me get rid of some vamps real quick?"

"Why? What's happening?" Colby questioned.

“...Rinaldi... asked for some of the rowdier vampires to be forced out. He said they're ruining his night.” Kevin explained.

Mike shrugged, standing up. “Well, anything is better than sitting back here.”

“Can't you get security to just do it?” Colby remarked.

“I am, but I need you two as well.” Kevin mentioned.

“Colby, it will only be like five minutes. I promise I won't leave. I'll stay right back here.” I admitted, bringing his attention to me.

Mike groaned. “C'mon man. Stop being so whipped, you've literally been together for like two days.”

“Shut the fuck up, Mike.” Colby snapped.

“Colby, I'll be fine.” I muttered softly.

Colby paused, sighing deeply. Then he slid me off his lap. He tapped Tara’s shoulder. "Watch her, please."

Tara agreed. “Of course, Colbster.”

They all left quickly, not saying another word.

“So... you and Colby are together?” Tara asked slyly.

“Yeah we are.” I affirmed.

Tara’s eyes sparkled mischievously. “I told you it would happen.”

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah you did.”

Jake pulled Tara back into their conversation, her body turning away from me. Suddenly, a loud group of voices came near us, one of the voices being Colby's. I jumped up from my seat, peaking around the corner to look. Colby, Mike, and two bodyguards were yelling at three different vampires, shoving them across the dancefloor and to the exit, the vampires fighting along the way. I followed Colby's body until I couldn't see him through the thick crowd of people. My eyes then traveled up to the VIP section, glancing around at the area that overlooked the whole club.

First, I found Kevin, nervously smiling at someone next to him and pointing at the forced-out vampires. And finally, my eyes landed on him... Rinaldi.

Dark hair... pale blue eyes...

I know him.

And the moment I recognized him; his eyes landed on mine. Once he realized who I was, he smirked lightly.

Someone yanked me from around the corner, shoving me back into my seat. I gazed up at Tara, who's brow furrowed. "What are you doing?"

“Nothing. I wanted to see who Colby was yelling at.” I replied.

“You heard what your boytoy said, stay back here.” Tara sassed.

I nodded begrudgingly, taking a sip of my drink. Colby and Mike came back a minute later, smiling as they came around the corner

“Why are you so happy?” Kat called.

Colby ran his fingers through his hair lazily. “Because I got to punch a vampire for getting in my face.”

“And honestly, any form of action right now is better than… this.” Mike frowned.

Kevin appeared again, coming up to Colby and whispering in his ear. Colby's smile dropped immediately, his jaw tightening. His eyes changed to crimson for a split second when Kevin pulled away. Colby grunted deeply. "What?"

“What's wrong?” Sam queried.

“Rinaldi wants to see... Jade.” Kevin fretted.

My heart sank for a moment as everyone's eyes landed on me.

“What's he wanna see her for?” Mike scoffed.

Kevin related. “He didn't say. All he said was that he wanted to see the human girl behind the stage.”

“Can't we just send some other human up there?” Colby barked.

Sam warned. “Colby.”

Kevin shook his head. “No. He knows what she looks likes.”

“I'm taking her up there.” Colby commanded.

“Well, keep your cool then. Don't need him to decapitate you over some girl.” Mike deadpanned.

“Mike, I mean this whole-heartedly: fuck off.” Colby snarled, glaring.

Colby grabbed my hand, took me from behind the stage, and slowly walked me towards the stairs that led to the VIP section. I leaned into Colby and yelled, "I've met him before!"

“What?” He exclaimed, stopping his movements.

I confessed. “He came to Vampiro about a week ago. He was the man that I talked to.”

“So that's why he wants to see you... Does he know about your powers?” He continued moving through the crowd to the stairs.

“No. I don't think so. I never told him, obviously.” I answered.

As we got to the stairs, Colby lowered his voice. “Okay. Just keep a low profile around him, alright? If he senses for even a millisecond that you're... you, he could easily kill you.”

“I know. This isn't my first time dealing with a vampire.” I teased sarcastically.

Colby stopped us again, his voice harsh. “I'm being serious, Jade. I don't want you to get hurt. I can't have that happen.”

I assured, rubbing his arm tenderly. “It won't, Colby. I'll be okay.”

We finally made it up the stairs of the VIP section, slowly walking over to Rinaldi. He sat comfortably in his booth, sipping his drink haphazardly.

Once his eyes landed on us, he smiled at me. “Long time no see, princess.”

Colby's grip on my hand tightened, making me almost wince. “Hi... Rinaldi.”

“So, you know my name. That's good. What's not good is the fact that I don't know yours.” He commented.

Colby interjected. “Her name is Jade. And I'm Colby.”

“Nice to meet the both of you. If you don't mind, I would like to catch up with Jade.” Rinaldi stared at Colby fiercely. “Alone.”

“I don't think that would be good... What if you or her need something?” Colby argued politely.

Rinaldi sneered. “Well, I'll just wave down to Kevin and he'll be able to get it for me.”

Colby hummed, annoyed. “I'm not sure that would be best.”

“Oh, but I think it is.” A dark crimson aura appeared around Colby suddenly as Rinaldi spoke. "Leave."

I glanced between the two of them, trying not to gasp as I saw Colby achingly let go of my hand. It was like he was forcing himself to stay, but his body had a different plan. He bit his lip as he tried to keep his feet from moving, grabbing onto another booth next to us to keep himself still. But his fighting was useless, his feet forcing him to walk away and down the stairs. He stared up at me nervously, like he couldn't control what he was doing.

Rinaldi's powers were strong enough to make a vampire do as he wanted...

I'm fucked.

“Sorry about that. I don't usually like to use my powers on my own kind, but sometimes we can be just so fucking persistent.” He laughed.

I giggled awkwardly, glancing away from him.

“You can sit down if you want. I'm not gonna bite.” He almost taunted, sweetly.

I nodded my head, sitting down at the end of the booth, my legs feeling like jello.

My mouth moved before I could think. “What are you doing here, if you don't mind me asking?”

He placed his glass down, lounging back against the booth. “I'm just here to have a good time, which has rarely happened in the 500 years I've been a vampire. Plus, I'm here in L.A. because I heard a rumor that I want cleared up.”

“What rumor?” I puzzled.

“You'll find out later.” His eyes glimmered as he grinned playfully. “So... is that the boy you were thinking about a couple days ago when we first talked?”

I swallowed. “Uh... yeah, he is.”

“Are you two together?” Rinaldi speculated.

I fidgeted with my rings, keeping my eyes to the floor. “It's, um, complicated. And new.”

“Well, I'm happy to hear you got what you wanted. Unforbidden love usually never comes true.” His voice falling to an utter.

“Did you come here because you knew I was here?” I blurted out.

“That's a little arrogant of you, don't you think?” Rinaldi smirked.

I stayed silent, not sure how to respond.

He chuckled. “I'm kidding. But, no; I didn't come here for you. I actually didn't know you were here. And then when you peaked around the corner from the DJ booth, I realized why this whole place smelled so delicious.”

I exhaled, nodding my head again. I was petrified to speak, unable to form a sentence.

“So... how did you meet that Colby fella?” He inquired.

“He-he saved me, one night after work. I was harassed by a vampire and... he killed him.” I sputtered.

“Interesting. I swear I heard something like that,” He shrugged nonchalantly. “And I can see why you were attacked. A beautiful girl with appetizing blood? That's a vampire's wet dream...”

I gulped, my hands beginning to shake. My nerves felt like they were going to bubble over and make me sick.

He cleared his throat suddenly, lightly sliding closer to me. “Jade, I apologize. That was rude of me to say. I can tell I'm making you nervous. And I don't want that. Honestly, I just want to talk to you. You're one of the first humans to not throw yourself at me or be rude to me because of what I am. I'm just used to saying inappropriate things to shock people, so I'm sorry if what I said made you upset. That wasn't my intention.”

I took a deep breath and finally looked him in the eyes. “Okay, I accept your apology.”

“Good. I appreciate that.” He sat back again, “It's been a long time since I've been close to anyone that wasn't family, so I'm not good at talking to strangers.”

“When was your last relationship?” I asked.

Rinaldi huffed. “Oh God... my last 'relationship', if you could call it that, was a couple months back. But I've only ever had one serious romance, and that was back when I was a human.”

“Really?” I awed.

“Yeah. Something like what you and Colby have is unheard of in my life.” He responded, crossing his arms.

“Me and Colby aren't that close.” I squeaked, feeling myself blush.

He shook his head. “I beg to differ. Not many vampires fight against my powers, or almost succeed. I can tell he cares about you deeply.”

“Your romance... what was her name?” I whispered.

“Elenora, or I called her El.” He divulged, smiling at the memory.

“What happened to her?” I queried.

He sighed sadly. “...She was forced into exile, in a way. Forced to run and leave me behind. I assume she died very young. I haven't felt what I felt for her since.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.” I interrupted.

He gazed over at me; an eyebrow raised cautiously.

“I can't even imagine the pain of not feeling love for hundreds and hundreds of years. I'm sorry you never felt that way again, and that you lost the love of your life.” I conceded.

Rinaldi's eyes softened genuinely for the first time. He almost looked surprised at what I said.

He almost looked… human.

He glanced away for a moment and took a swig of his drink. Once he finished, he smiled.

“Do you wanna know a secret? Something I've never told a human before?” He suggested.

“Sure...” I murmured.

“My real name is not Rinaldi.” He disclosed.

I raised my eyebrows. “Oh?”

“Well, technically it is, it's my last name. Or at least the last name I created for myself. It's based off of my father's first name, Reinald.” He revealed, “My actual name is Dillon.”

“Well, it's nice to meet you, Dillon.” I greeted, half-smiling.

He hummed, smirking. “And it was nice meeting you, Jade.”

He stood up quickly and went over to the railing that faced the rest of the club. I got up and followed him, confused as to what was happening. I followed his eyes, staring deeply at the DJ. The DJ suddenly made eye contact with Rinaldi, and a scarlet aura appeared around him. Rinaldi mouthed something and abruptly the music turned off. The crowd came to a halt, all glancing around.

He clapped, catching people’s attention. “Now, I just want to say thank you all for coming out and entertaining me for the night. I appreciate it immensely. But now, it's time for you to leave.”

Everyone in the club stood still, staring up at Rinaldi.

“Leave. NOW!” He boomed, his deep voice echoing off the walls.

The crowd jumped back at his voice, scrambling to leave. Security helped force people out, as Rinaldi bit his lip and turned to me.

“At least that time I didn't have to use my powers,” He joked. “C'mon downstairs with me.”

I nodded sheepishly, following Rinaldi as he strutted down the stairs. All my friends had stayed, helping to get people out quickly. Then when Rinaldi got to the bottom of the stairs, we all met up in the middle of the dance floor.

I paced over to Colby, embracing him tightly as I breathed a sigh of relief.

“Are you okay? Did he do anything to you?” He gasped, mumbling into my hair.

I gripped Colby firmly, finally relaxing. “I'm okay. He didn't do anything.”

Rinaldi’s voice made me pull away from Colby. “Wow, Kevin. You really do know how to throw a party. I'll have to come back here sometime.”

Kevin snickered confidently. “Of course, Rinaldi. We always appreciate elders stopping through.”

“Oh, but I will say there is one downside to this night.” He pointed out, raising a finger sarcastically.

“What? Did Jade do something?” Kevin quipped.

“No, she was fine. But I think you forgot to mention that there was a secret club in here.” Rinaldi stated calmly.

I could feel Colby's body stiffen against mine. Everyone reacted the same; muscles tightening, and stances fixed.

Kevin stuttered. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“I could have sworn I heard something about vampires hunting other vampires. But... that's illegal in California. And I know you're not doing anything illegal here... right?” Rinaldi cocked his head to the side.

“Of course not. I-I'm not entirely sure where you would have heard that from, but it's not true.” Kevin stammered, voice faltering.

Rinaldi crossed his arms. “Are you sure? Because I have a very reliable source. He's actually here right now.”

The entrance behind us slammed open, a familiar face stepping through, smirking at all of us as we turned to him.

Caleb.

“Oh my God, I'm gonna kill him.” Mike fumed quietly.

“I don't think you should do that, Mike. You don't want to piss off an elder now.” Caleb jeered, striding to Rinaldi and standing next to him.

“Caleb... how could you rat us out? After everything we have done for you!” Sam shouted.

Caleb scoffed. “Oh, you mean like poisoning me and making me forget a whole night happened?!”

I could hear Colby growl lowly, his hands clenching into a fist.

“Caleb, please tell me what you know about this group.” Rinaldi spoke.

“Well for starters they're called XPLR, which is the dumbest name by the way. And they, with the help of those two douchey humans, kill vampires. They hunt and torture them for information on other 'bad' vampires. Plus, they have the Angelica flower and they gave it to me to knock me out and make me forget.” Caleb accused.

“And how would you know if you forgot?” Colby retorted.

“I'm not fucking stupid, asshole. I know what happened to me… kind of,” Caleb grumbled. “Plus, something is off about that girl.”

My breath hitched in my throat. Colby slid in front of me, protecting me. “What are you going on about now, Caleb?”

“I heard you guys talking about her 'abilities', whatever that means. And I know one of you said that your powers don't work on her, so obviously she's not human.” Caleb declared angrily.

Rinaldi stared at Caleb, unfazed. “This is news to me.”

“She's probably a witch or something.” Caleb muttered.

Rinaldi turned his head slowly towards me. “Jade, could you come here for a second?”

“No. She can't.” Colby shook, rage filling his voice and body.

“Don't make this more difficult than it already is,” Rinaldi insisted. “I'm not gonna hurt her, but I will hurt you.”

“Colby, it's okay.” I whimpered; my breath ragged.

Colby closed his eyes tightly, moving slightly over to allow me to pass him. I trudged over to Rinaldi, stopping in front of him.

“I know this is a terrible situation to put you through, but I need to know if you have powers or not.” Rinaldi explained.

“Okay...” I mumbled.

“I'm gonna use my powers on you to do something you wouldn't do.” He informed.

“And what is that?” I questioned.

“I want you to kiss me.” He stated.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Colby jerk, ready to pounce. Mike stopped him with an arm.

Rinaldi pointed to Colby, keeping his eyes on me. “See, that reaction is why I have to do it. I know for a fact she wouldn't want to kiss me because she's with you. It's the only way, I'm afraid.”

Rinaldi gently grabbed my hands, making me look into his eyes.

And I realized something in that moment. He had never used his powers on me. And he was the strongest vampire I'd ever encountered.

What if his powers work on me? What if I end up kissing him?

I don't want that. I don't want to hurt Colby. But I don't want to die either.

Fuck.

"Kiss me, Jade." A ruby aura appeared around us; I could feel his power surge through me. I could see what he wanted me to do, but I felt no urge to do it. Then an idea hit me.

I leaned forward, having to stretch upwards to meet his face. I slowly eased my lips towards him and planted them sweetly on his cheek, pulling away a second later.

Once I landed back on my feet, his aura had disappeared. I could see everyone around us was shocked, frozen. No one moved even an inch.

He looked down at me curiously. I peered into his eyes confidently.

“You never said where.”

Rinaldi grinned, letting out a soft laugh. His hands let go of mine as he shook his head. “That... is very true.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Rinaldi, you have to see she is lying!” Caleb shrieked, gasping.

“Caleb. Listen to me,” Rinaldi cautioned. “I appreciate you coming to me and letting me know about all of this. But it's obvious she is not a witch otherwise she wouldn't have kissed me.”

“But something is off about her! I just know it!” Caleb shrilled, glaring daggers.

“Enough, Caleb. I want you to apologize to her.” Rinaldi demanded.

Caleb objected as his eyes widened. “What?!”

“Apologize to her, right now. Accusing a lady of something wrongful deserves an apology.” Rinaldi scolded.

Caleb rolled his eyes quickly, stepping up to me and looking me in the eyes. “I'm sorry I accused you.”

“Thank you... for your service, Caleb.” Rinaldi announced, placing a hand on Caleb's shoulder.

Then within a flash, Rinaldi smashed both of his hands onto either side of Caleb's head, gripping his skull dangerously, and ripping it clean off his body before he could even make a noise.

I felt blood splatter onto my face, my mouth opening as a loud gasp escaped my throat. Everyone stepped back, shocked in horror at Caleb's headless body laid on the ground. Rinaldi flung Caleb's head behind him, it rolling away after bouncing once.

Rinaldi lightly wiped his hands on his pants, blood smearing onto his all black outfit. “Thank God that's over. He was very, very annoying.”

I held back vomit as I kept my eyes on Rinaldi, not wanting to see Caleb's corpse on the ground.

Rinaldi faced Kevin casually. “Sorry I had to dirty up your floor, Kevin. I hope you know how to deal with a dead body.”

“Yeah... it's no problem, Rinaldi.” Kevin remained still.

“Also, I apologize for having to do all of that,” Rinaldi motioned to Caleb’s body. “Caleb was making such a big deal about XPLR that I just had to come out and see what it was all about. I personally don't care that you guys hunt other vampires. I know you're only getting rid of the ones that are fucking it up for the rest of us. So, keep doing what you're doing. Just maybe be a bit quiet about it, okay?”

Mike concluded. “Sounds good.”

“I mean, who would I be to judge those that have killed vampires?” Rinaldi whipped his head to Tara, smiling politely, “Right, Tara?”

“Burn in hell, Dillon.” Tara seethed.

“Always as chipper as ever. Well, that this has been eventful, but I think it's time for me to head out.” Rinaldi bowed to Kevin, clasping his hands together. “Thank you for such a fabulous time, Kevin. Your club is fantastic.”

Kevin followed suit cautiously. “Thank you. Have a good night, Rinaldi.”

He turned to me quickly, a cheery smile on his face. “I'll see you around, princess.”

Then with a wink, he was gone in a flash.

<< CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 16 >>

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