#this isn't the MOST convincing but...it was a very very cool and fun project

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Oscar Piastri x reader who is super talkative and can ramble for hours on end?

She's A Yapper - OP81

No part 2 requests please

Some people might say that Oscar and y/n aren't well paid. Those people would be wrong. And Oscar will tell them as much.

Before he met y/n, admittedly his world was a lot more quiet and held a lot less philosophical questions to think about. But he's also say it was boring and y/n's perspective on the world, which she tells him all about because sharing her thoughts with him is a way that she shares her love, is one of the best thing he can listen to during his day.

Zak has overhead y/n talking before and joked that y/n is like Oscar's own personal podcast.

"Did you know that some the stars we see are dead? Because the speed of light means that we're seeing them how they were 4000 years ago." Y/n states making Oscar smile since he does sometimes wonder not only where y/n learns this stuff but where she stores it all. "A lot of them are still alive but some of them are dead."

"I hope your favourites aren't dead." Oscar comments making her turn and grin, and it's the grin she gets when she's about to make an awful cheesy comment. Something she does often just because it makes Oscar all flustered, no matter how bad it is.

"Well my favourite and brightest star is definitely very fit and alive. Aren't you?"

Oscar groans shaking his head at her while she just grins proudly at him then stealing a kiss while his face is flushed.

"Baby, that was bad." Oscar laughs lightly before smiling as she just shrugs unapologetic about it.

"I think one day we should go to one of those astronomy places where they project the sky onto the ceiling and just talk about the stars."

Y/n would get bored after 10 minutes and Oscar would probably fall asleep, it also won't happen because y/n has a million and ten date ideas that have been suggested and then never mentioned again.

"Can we go to the beach now we're back in Melbourne?" Y/n asks making Oscar smile.

"Yes, of course we can." Oscar confirms making her grin.

Y/n starts to ramble about going to the beach and suggests taking some of the team.

Obviously Oscar in Australia means that he's getting most of the attention from the fans. Most of them support him or Daniel. Right now, primarily him because he's the new young talent who is showing promising potential for a big future in F1.

-

Sitting in the McLaren unit on the Thursday for media, a lot of it isn't filled with a whole lot. They get to have a lot of breaks between media duties.

"I love your helmet." Y/n comments as she lies on the sofa with his helmet on her stomach then she gasps sitting up making Oscar raise his eyebrows at her. "I just had the most amazing idea-well if you like the idea-"

"I will." Oscar assures her since he's never not liked an idea she's came up with.

"We could both design one side of a helmet. Even if you don't use it, it sounds fun."

He does love it. Mainly because at the beginning of his F1 career, y/n was really scared to be overly involved. It didn't take him long to notice she was really sort of dodging being involved with it.

"Which race are you thinking? Or do you want to do it for the next home race?" Oscar questions making her smile a little. "Go on, I know you have a race in mind."

"Well, since you've asked. I think it'd be fun to design your helmet for Singapore." Y/n states earning a smile from Oscar. "It's one of my favourite races and you had such a cool helmet last year, so it wouldn't be unusual to have a special helmet. I just like the idea of it. I don't know what my half would be but Singapore is quite a while away."

"That's true." Oscar confirms then smiling lightly at her. "I love you."

"I love you too. So much. Like...a lot." Y/n grins then grinning as she moves over and kisses the Aussie only for Lando to walk in.

"Ah! My eyes! My poor innocent eyes!" Lando exclaims earning a laugh from the young woman while Oscar just smiles.

"I know you're not trying to convince me that your eyes are even the slightest bit innocent." Y/n snorts earning a dramatic gasp from the Brit with his hand going to his chest.

"Alright, but Oscar is innocent." Lando states earning a smirk from the young woman.

"For your sanity-"

"Yeah, going to stop you there." Oscar smiles covering her mouth while Lando laughs.

-

Sometimes Oscar likes to hear y/n talk for hours on purpose. Like he says something to trigger her into a mass of thoughts that she can't filter and shares with him just speaking everything she thinks.

One of his favourite things to listen to her talk about is how she pictures their future.

"Baby." Oscar mumbles making her look up at him since they're in the hotel, a couple days earlier than the race weekend required purely to adjust to the timezone a bit more. "How do you picture our future?"

"Short or long term?" Y/n asks already excited to talk about it.

There's something so comforting about the fact that y/n really feels secure enough to not fear talking about how confident she is in their future together and how she has plans for it already.

"Both." Oscar smiles gently before he watches her shift a little purely out of being excited to do this.

"So short term, my Oscar Piastri is going be champion within a couple years." Y/n grins earning a hum of approval from him. "And possibly within 5 years we might be engaged."

5 years is a stretch. It's a generous window for him, her way of trying to not put any pressure on him about it and he knows it. But she'll be lucky to get out of 2025 without a ring on her finger from him.

"Then a wedding somewhere warm, preferably Australia because it's home." Y/n goes on practically gushing over the idea of their wedding. "As much as I'd love to see you as a girl dad with too many daughters to comprehend. I think I'll get pregnant and we'll have a little boy and then two girls."

"A boy and two girls ok." Oscar nods earning a grin before she flaps her hand excitedly at him.

"We'll be the best parents, not just parenting but we'll just be the milf and dilf of F1." Y/n beams earning a small laugh. "That's short term, there's just going to be F1, marriage and raising kids. Long term, when you eventually retire, we'll just live full time in Australia. The kids will be hitting the teen years, getting into whatever hobbies they've got. Maybe karting, maybe biking-maybe anything! We'd obviously be the type of parents who support any endeavour."

"Obviously."

"And they'd get to brag about their dad."

"Oh I'm a bragging right?"

"I brag about you."

Oscar grins at that because he knows she absolutely spends a lot of time bragging about him and she's unapologetic about it.

"What else is in our future?"

"Mmm...I think we'll travel a lot outside of work. I also think we'll keep our kids to us. They don't need to be in the limelight unless whatever they want to pursue requires it." Y/n hums earning a nod from Oscar since he knows she's yet to delve into what she wants to talk about with him.

"Names?"

"Boy is going to be called Connor. Because Connor Piastri because I've always like the name Connor. Then we're going to have Eden and Mabel Piastri. Because they're pretty names even if they're for old women."

"So they'll be Piastri's?" Oscar questions though he's only joking since he knows y/n loves his last name.

"We'll all be Piastri's."

Fuck did he say by the end of 2025? No. He's getting a ring before the end of the month.

Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos @llando4norris @partyinpitlane @lpab @xoscar03 @harrysdimple05

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #oscar piastri f1 #oscar piastri one shot #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri imagine #piastri #mclaren #op81 #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri fluff #oscar piastri fic #op81 imagine #op81 x reader #op81 fic #op81 fluff #op81 fanfic #op81 one shot #op81 x you #op81 x y/n #mclaren formula 1 #mclaren f1 #mclaren racing #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine

[tashacee]

pondering what a fic would look like if the 'wild is stuck in aspect form' idea was taken to its natural extreme: every character with a transformation is stuck in it.

wild is in aspect form of course, twilight is stuck as wolfie, hyrule is stuck as a fairy, legend is in bunny form. four i think would be picori size, when they split and work together they kinda look like pikmin. time is stuck in one of his masked forms, i think he's a grizzled deku scrub with one eye that doesn't glow that has a big gash through it.

wind, sky, and warriors don't have transformations that come to mind, so itd just be a very exasperated warriors trying to coordinate a group consisting of a blind man, a disturbingly skilled child, two non-hylian humanoids, two very very small humanoids, and two straight up animals that wars isn't convinced are fully sentient.

wind is having lots of fun with all the animals about. sky thought fi was fucking with him when they first met four, but by the time they meet cat man wild hes like "man the races sure do evolve in the future." warriors is just like "really, this is what hylia sends me, a tree man and a straight up rabbit?"

most if not all of the transformed are unable to talk, leaving all of them in the state of "how do i tell my cool non-hylian friends im just a normal hylian." as soon as one of them reveals it everyone else does, leaving the transformees shocked, sky and wind laughing hysterically, and wars like "You're telling me I've been wrangling fairies and cat men and i could have had an army of normal hylians this whole time."

he is so, so tired.

👀👀👀👀 you have INSPIRED me

#it me #replies #hero’s aspect au #hero's aspect #linked universe #lu #linked universe fic #linked universe fanfic

[factorialsotherfandoms]

its 6am and I'm complaining myself through the ending of purgatory k? This is just the bitching not a full balanced analysis, bits I genuinely enjoyed are missing so it looks like I have a worse opinion than I did, its below a cut because a lot of people don't want that and that's absolutely good. I'm just processing through.

I think purgatory ending feels bad because we were promised by the way it was advertised and treated the end of the arc, and what we got was another fucking mid point instead. A mid point which after this going on for so long nobody really wanted. Setting up new project cool! But it felt miserable to watch the end. Probably could have been helped if the CCs had more info on a meta level - just the timescales and that this wasn't actually the end of the arc - so they could pace themselves and us better. The eggs missing has gone on for far too long, we've been given far too little to work with, and it's just not fun viewing any more. Which is why my engagement is so dependent on the next little while.

That, plus getting to the boat on foot was impossible without near perfection - something they were never going to all have. I like giving qMaxo his big sendoff with the nuke which solves nothing! But people who were legitimately trying to escape (Cellbit, Tina, off the top of my head - Cellbit just legit got lost in the underground. He said after he decided to stay but like... really? We'll have to wait and see next time he plays qsmp. If nothing else he legit had shit to do planned, and I feel like he would discuss it more with Roier if he was going to perma-kill Cellbit as that's massive to put on someone else's character. Pretty sure ccCellbit was just teasing like he fucking does but we'll see. Also changes what Maxo did if any of them die to it /significantly/. I'll be genuinely worried for ccMaxo if his characters actually pretty neat death arc resulted in a fan favourite character permadying in a game without permadeath) should have had a legit chance to do so. If they were supposed to be able to. I really hope the admins smooth that bit over one way or another, because it just made shit feel extremely bad. Kinda expect the /actual/ ruling to be if one person made it they all did, but dear god they needed to tell the players that immediately after or whatever if so. Failing that you could maybe have the others in the Nether or something, but youd need to coordinate everyone who didn't make it and that'd just suck logistically. The sensible answer is if one person got there they all did because this isn't a high legality sort of game. For players.

Like the other eggs were probably kidnapped by something and reported out? And I'm betting on black concrete plot as that's the plot actually associated with them disappearing in the first place, but for all it's cool moments up until then it just... dropped the ball. Tbh the entire thing with the eggs being involved was a massive ball drop which lead to /one/ cool conversation but otherwise just made everything infinitely less enjoyable.

Poor BBH. Like cc wise. He's one of a whole lot of them who have horrific rp safety practices, but also there's not really anyone to teach them that and that's nothing to punish someone for. Hope it gets hashed out with him. All of them but especially him.

Having players of another project as "advertising" for a new project without them knowing more in advance tastes kinda shitty. Very shitty. We'll see how tied it ends up being but that's just not comfy.

Quackity saying about big stuff planned is absolute ass. Like legitimately and out of character the CCs genuinely need a break for a bit you can't just throw them back into heavy stuff immediately. They need space to breath oc and find their footing ic. Most of them have streamed far more than usual this fortnight, and even for those who do stream daily usually it's been intense. You can say if its hurting them they can just take a break but you cannot convince me they can when their literal irl incomes depend on this. Some more than others, but they do.

Also like the tension just genuinely doesn't hold that long. Most of what I run is combat heavy fantasy events, but I've done horror too. And a big bit of running horror events is studying how pacing and tension works, especially over an extended period (horror events locally tend to be multi-day). You /can/ change the usual layout, but you have to know your fucking shit and be really careful if you do, and the admins and Quackity just don't seem to - as a collective whole, some individuals may - have the experience necessary to fuck with the formula. Like. I'm burnt out, the players are ooc burnt out, the fandom generally seems burnt out - not giving the players a win here was already a mistake, but the tension /has/ snapped. Too many people are too burnt out from playing more than usual and all that, under very high stakes circumstances, for very little reward. There needs to be a break where players who do other stuff can play other stuff and players who don't can take the time to find their footing again. Tension levels are not sustainable and they broke them open. If they hadn't revealed the eggs you could have stretched it another few days, but they did. At which point losing the eggs again is genuinely so fucking unsatisfying. They could have only been shown the winning egg. Like sure fuck with people, that's what's going on IC and OC maybe it was supposed to be reassurance, but it just ended up feeling ghoulish. It was so obviously playing on feelings it just fell flat for me. Not even the fun playing with feelings, just a fuck you.

Also communication has been fucking atrocious. Yes keep twists in the bag, I can see arguments for all plot points, but the players needed to know the timescale, the fact it was a PvP not a lore event, and that this wasn't the end of the eggs missing arc rather an interlude waaaaaaaaaaay earlier. Like they found out as these things became obvious, but given the time commitment it demanded they needed to know like weeks before it started. As soon as it was announced. We can tall all we like about trusting the admins, but the admins have got to fucking trust their players to still make good viewing times even if not everything is a complete surprise. It fucked over Cellbit and Roier and their murder plot planning, it fucked over a lot of people ooc and their streaming schedules and their ability to do actual life things. Forever when given the Judas plot should have been told in advance when it would be activatable. The players - not the characters or the audience, the players - should have known it was 15 days, PvP, only 1 egg was on the cards for now, that the chance to save the others will come later (I have no doubt it will), and that they would need to escape fast at the end. Not the why, not the how, not the plot, but you need to know the fucking stakes.

Like okay let's look at shit I run a sec. Its nor perfect, but we've been building on a 20+ year tradition of larp in the same place and learning from what does and doesnt work. Info players have in advance:

date and time. for things run for and at the university, dates generally are announced start of the year, and which system will be which day is the start of every term. For events for the uni but at an unusual place or time (often an IC dinner party or similar), 3 weeks in advance. For stuff not associated with the university (I help with fewer of these, as far fewer happen and theyte the ones i can still play with my disability)... well, they tend to be multi day in a hired venue and players pay a lot of money to be there, so its usually about a year and a half in advance. The stuff below about pitches are for saturday ones - paid for multi day events all that info is announced at least a year in advance, and for single day non-university ones at least 6 months. But like qsmp is a constantly running thing so the university stuff is a fairer comparison.

Every event has a "pitch". This goes up the Tuesday before for Saturday events - theres a couple of different teams running different genres but same place same time theres a larp every termtime saturday just 9/30 are run by my team. The pitch will contain the information the characters know going into a mission or social or whatever. If theres a twist the twist isn't mentioned, ofc, just the initial setup. Then, there's an out of character section, with stuff like date and time and reminders to weather weather appropriate clothing and sturdy shoes.

If the event is /not/ in the format players expect, in the out of character info including things like the time, we say that. We run combat heavy stuff. If it's purely social, we say so. If it'll be more Freeform than usual, we say so. If the party is getting split we - you guessed it - say so.

Our events have different levels of IC rewards. The basic reward can always be assumed (3 gold, iirc). Theres also 4 and 5 gold days. If its not 3 gold, it says so in the pitch, and players know this is a difficulty rstinf system. 3 is normal, 4 is "this is designed to be challenging for late end high xp characters and is likely to kill lower levels", 5 is "we are actively trying to kill someone". Death is always an option, but the ref team don't usually want it.

Sometimes there are RP rewards too. These are not explicately stated, but are alluded to "you will be paid so long as you eliminate the monster. If you capture it and deliver it to the university, however, the chancellor promises an extra something for you" sort of thing. "The Dowager Duchess is well known for rewarding those in her favour. Impress her, and she may do the same for you".

If there's distressing content that isn't covered by genre and game style, we include a warning. Last time was "this session will include horror elements. A list of content warnings is available from any ref on request", and we DMed players we knew have triggers on that list the same day pitch went out to liase with them. Yes even when the trigger is a plot twist or a spoiler because fuck you player safety will always be most important. One which had content warnings but was not horror "this session contains potentially distressing material. A list of content warnings is available from any ref on request".

And like... call me naive but this is the sort of info the players should have? In advance they should have a summary (yes it's also given IC at the start of the event, but it means they can prep properly), dates and times well in advance (so they can prep their lives and other projects), expected rewards (even if vague), and any particularly common triggers (like say a third party intentionally sewing paranoia and fucking with mental health of characters) should have a "theres triggers here please put a message in your help channel for a list". I'd say also some indicator of where on a plot arc something falls.

We dont give this because our pacing plot arc wise is determined by how we run them. Paid events are all always one offs (I run them with a different group of people but same circle) - except when they aren't in which case this is made clear at the pitching stage- and uni ones its dictated by the university schedule - we run nine main events a year, 3 each term. There's a small climax last linear of every term, and a major one at the end of a year. Yearly arcplots do not always exist but when they do they end with the last linear of term. There are some other plots brewing over longer periods - when those come to a head, they will become the main plot for a year and their climaxes run on yearly arcplot rules. It is never the case that all sessions in a year are arcplot related, to give players not interested in a specific thing something to do.

Other things they could probably do with include a safe word and establishing a way for an admin to indicate a fuck up due to glitch or mistake - probably an "ignore me" emote only admins have access to.

This all being said - the admin team want people to have fun and for it to go well, and the medium is much younger than traditional LARP. Information for their specific media does not exist, and while they maybe should look at rp for ideas they probably look at tabletop and don't even consider LARP - let alone larp styles more common in Europe. I can say things all I want, but I'm just a guy over here. The admins are trying their best and do want the best for their players, and will have a plan. It's just infuriating sometimes.

#fandom neg #qsmp neg

[rapid-artwork]

After honing my cartoon-ing skills a bit further, I've moved on to making some new characters for a secret project. Studying the Cartoon Network™ style has paid off.

Names subject to chance, but for now let's meet Charlie and Penny.

Charlie (Lee to his friends, Charlie to his teachers, Charles to his parents whenever he is in trouble.) He is the ultimate big brother. He just turned 13 and is convinced that he is the coolest person to ever exist. He even has his own Palm Pilot Handi-Man™ 20X6! He definitely didn't steal it from his dad's office, so don't even ask!

His RCA-Lyra Portable Music Player™ is filled to capacity with all the hottest MP3s. (Literally just the Kingdom Hearts OST and nothing else.) He knows all the cheat codes to every Sega Dreamcast game, and just last week he got to see his first PG-13 movie! (Jurassic Park 2: The Lost World, he hasn't seen the first one and probably isn't aware it exists.) He was very brave and only cried a few times!

He spent all of his allowance on a pair of ripped jeans but his mom made him sew patches on the knees so his legs wouldn't get cold.

He can and will die for Penny at the drop of hat.

Penny: (Short for Penelope, but she tells everybody that it's short for "Dollar", exactly 99 cents short. She's very proud of that joke and tells it everybody.)

She is the ultimate little sister. She is 10 years old and is very nervous about what happens when you are too old to count your age on your fingers. She loves playing with her dolls, and listening to her favorite death metal band, 𝕲𝕺𝕺𝕱𝖄 𝕺𝕮𝕿𝕺𝕭𝕰𝕽 (Goofy October; the most intense PG rated death metal band in all of Canada.)

She has a bad relationship with the local dentist because she refuses to stop chewing on the cool rocks she finds in the woods behind her school. She has destroyed multiple retainers with great prejudice and shows no signs of stopping anytime soon.

Literally everyone loves Penny and finds it impossible to say a bad word about her no matter how hard they try. Every single person in town is terrified of what might happen if she gets too sad. It is foretold in the ancient scriptures that if Penny cries for more than 60 seconds the entire world comes to a violent end.

These two are gonna be protagonists in a fun little video game I'm pitching. It will be very weird.

In process sketches I made in designing their character below the cut:

Charlie had Johnny Bravo energy from the beginning. It was pivotal that he wasn't just "cool" but specifically what a 13 year old THINKS is "cool"

Penny's design was nearly perfect from the get-go, but I had to get the hair just right. She feels like a mix of every single KND character and I like that.

#cartoon #OC #OC stuff #cartoon characters #character design #original character #Charlie and Penny #concept art #story concept #character art #rey rapids #Rapids artwork #sketch #oc sketch #sketchbook #Palm Pilot #artists on tumblr #cartoon network #cartoon nostalgia #art style #art style practice #cartoons #doodles #GOOFY OCTOBER #Charlie Rad #Penny Rad

[shadowmaat]

No fun allowed

Internet drama and controversy can be fun to watch, but I also love silly things, feel good stories, and other harmless fun that gets shared on the internet.

I am, however, exhausted by the ever-increasing number of people who feel compelled to state that something-or-other is "obviously fake" or to otherwise question the validity/intentions of the poster.

Look. Kids. Sometimes, yes, it's important to clarify when something being shared is verifiably false. Especially if what's being shared contains dangerous misinformation that could cause harm to someone else.

Most of the time, though, it doesn't matter. And just because you personally believe something is fake doesn't mean you're right. Stop being an asshole just for the sake of trying to prove how much smarter and better you are than everyone else. Stop trying to discredit strangers on the internet who aren't hurting anyone and are very likely telling the truth. Stop assuming everything is fake. There's a time and a place for those kind of conversations and accusations. Learn how to tell the difference.

The most recent example I've seen is on a video of someone unrolling their knitting project only for it to roll off the end of the bed and startle a cat the maker didn't realize was there. Cute. Funny. No harm done.

Someone in the comments questioned why they were filming if they didn't know the cat was there. Condescending. Accusatory. Rude.

The person was clearly intending to show off all the work they'd accomplished on their knitting project. Very cool and stripey and either a scarf or possibly one side of a to-be-completed blanket. Or a bed for a boa constrictor, who knows? Point is, someone was trying to show off something they were proud of and then got a startled cat as a bonus.

Even if it had been a "set-up" though, so what? Is it hurting anyone? No. Does it change the context of what's seen in the video? No. There's no harm and no foul and no goddamn reason to be a petty suspicious jerk about it.

Another example would be any of Seanan McGuire's Tales of Animal Rehab and Chaos. Some of these do sound bizarre, like the alligator lizard in the leg story, but weird things DO happen (especially around Seanan) and accusing her of making stuff up for attention/clout is fucking rude. Sure, she's a storyteller, but some things she doesn't need to make up. Especially if she isn't getting paid for it. lol

Again, no one gets hurt by stories like that (ignoring the injuries sustained in the story itself) and it's also a good example of what NOT to do if you find an alligator lizard in your tent/sleeping bag. Important safety tip: don't try stabbing something anywhere near your own body.

People can, however, get hurt by constant accusations of lying. Seanan no longer shares those awesome stories because when she did it always resulted in a bunch of armchair fact-checkers calling her a liar and demanding "proof" that any of it happened.

When it comes to stuff like AITA or that Neighborhood thing or whatever, sure, some of those stories are made up. But again, who cares? Do you think you'll get points for calling out an obviously fake story about, I dunno, some dude replacing his gf's perfume for skunk spray because he's convinced she's cheating on him? No. No one cares. Other than maybe reassuring people that so-and-so isn't in any danger, you gain literally nothing by outing it as fake.

Sometimes those things are done for fun. And sometimes they're based on real examples of the kinds of things that have happened. And even when they're fake they can act as cautionary tales to help folks identify potentially dangerous behaviors. Maybe a guy hasn't actually replaced a wife's/girlfriend's perfume with skunk spray, but people of all identities have engaged in paranoid, possessive behavior and if you know what the warning signs look like you can take precautions. Same with tall tales from the workplace. Or involving neighbors. Or whatever. If it isn't hurting anyone and isn't spreading dangerous misinformation, maybe consider leaving it alone.

[sodiumlamp]

Lower Decks

I'm not gonna liveblog Lower Decks because I only liveblogged Picard to maintain my sanity as I endured it. It was more of a defense mechanism than a plan. The only reason I bring up LD is because I wanted to end the Picard thing on a more positive note. Lower Decks is a much better show, and I dare say watching Picard first made me enjoy the experience even more.

It's a comedic take on Star Trek, and the show could be forgiven for playing fast and loose with the premise, but it doesn't. Lower Decks feels like a very authentic Star Trek expereince, but it just has a comedic flavor to it.

It also does a whole lot of callbacks to old Star Trek lore. The difference is that LD isn't depending on the viewer to get all the callbacks. If you don't notice or recognize Spock Two's skeleton hanging in that display room on the collector's ship, it doesn't matter, because the plot doesn't hinge on it. LD also doesn't pull the Picard trick of making callbacks as an end unto itself, like Adam Soong holding a folder entitled "PROJECT KHAN" and nothing happens. Lower Decks has some running subplots, but it's very clear to its audience about which moments are clues and which moments are fun easter eggs.

Most critically, Lower Decks maintains the optimism of the classic 20th Century Star Trek shows. You watch an episode, and things usually work out by the end of it. More importantly, when people lose faith in the world they live in, there's some moment where that faith is restored. Starfleet stands for something and it's not just empty slogans or cynical public relations. It's not all sunshine and rainbows, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel and the characters generally find it. Except for Peanut Hamper. Fuck you, Peanut Hamper.

The fundamental conflict in the show is that these are all good people who strive to be better, to do better, and they tend to get in each other's way as they try to improve. Mariner defies her superiors because they doesn't always know best, but sometimes her superiors do know best. Boimler (and other characters) crave promotion and recognition, but he sometimes has to take a step back and consider why he wants those things. There's an episode where he joins a group of ambitious ensigns and they practice making inspiring leadership speeches, but he eventually realizes that it's a skill he can't use in the here and now. "We have to inspire the crew!" "We are the crew!"

The show demonstrates just how badly Picard fumbled the ball with its "everything sucks now" philosophy. In theory, you can do a utopia-gone-wrong story with Star Trek, but there needs to be a clear understanding of what went wrong and how it gets fixed. You can't just make a Star Trek story that flat out repudiates the optimistic future. You can just have the characters say "Whoops, that never worked!" That'd be like Batman deciding that crime is actually pretty cool. Shows like Picard try to convince the audience that the only way to tell a story is to break everything and make it miserable. Lower Decks proves that's a lie told by lazy showrunners who only know how to pull one lever.

Part of the problem, I think, is that these studios keep trying to do big events, relying on spectacle over storytelling. That's why Picard Season 2 had to climax with Picard's mother hanging herself. It has to be this big provocative moment, regardless of whether it makes sense or fits the characters. Picard has prophetic dreams of Data, the exploding girl looks just like the one from the old painting, it was the Borg the whole time, and by golly there sure are a lot of decapitations in this show.

By contrast, one of the most powerful moments on Lower Decks is when Captain Freeman finally gets fed up with Mariner and has her transferred to Starbase 80. It's not a big, apocalyptic moment that will Change The Marvel Universe Forever™, but it's effective, because the show took the time to establish that Starbase 80 is the worst assignment in Starfleet, and it's the one punishment Mariner takes seriously, and Freeman must be really upset if she's decided to take it that far. And then later, she regrets her decision, and when things work out in the end, their reconciliation is that much more satisfying. It just works. Not everything has to be a swordfight in a Borg Cube, for crying out loud.

I haven't watched Season 4 yet, but I'm really looking forward to seeing the new Vulcan character, T'Lyn on the show. Now we have two blueshirts in the cast. And they're not doctors or nurses! Nothing against doctors or nurses, but there's a severe lack of science division characters in Star Trek, and that screenshot of two of them doing something involving hydrogen samples is more exciting than a hundred Jack Crushers. I hope they do a whole episode about hydrogen samples. That would kick ass.

#mike watches picard #sheer fucking hubris #fuck you peanut hamper #you can't study hydrogen samples you betrayed your uniform!

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

there really is something to be said IMO for, like, sometimes if you're a person prone to making yourself feel crazy and miserable all the time by thinking a million thoughts an hour about how everything is hard and everything feels miserable and you are bad at all of it so why bother, actually it can be very valuable to do something in the actual external world that is like actually hard and feels kind of miserable and that you suck at. or, it can be very valuable to do things in the actual external world generally, including things that are hard, and including things that feel miserable, and including things that you suck at. so many improvements in my ability to feel okay operating in my life day to day stem from stuff that sucked but that sucked for like, real reasons. the magicians does this to some degree with both quentin and (more successfully ultimately, through the portion of the show i acknowledge as canon) eliot and i really appreciate it, because from the outside, like, having to be the king of a deranged magic country you only just heard of and having to impregnate your virgin wife and never being able to go to earth and dealing with stealth fairy invasion, that shouldn't, on paper, be easier than, like, going to magic grad school where you live with all your friends and are good at magic and cheating your way through classes when the need arises and throwing parties and mixing tacky drinks you've convinced yourself are cool and getting laid a lot. like, objectively, the king thing is harder. most people, forced to pick between those two options, would immediately choose the one that involves sleeping in and living on earth. but it makes such perfect and complete emotional sense to me that for eliot it's the opposite, and one of them is a shiny surface thinly covering up a whole bunch of mess ready to start a steady and ugly implosion at the first provocation, and the other, like, fixes him, kinda. it makes sense to me that one of them is fun and one of them is horrible and it's the one that feels worse in the moment that leads to him feeling better in like his own actual human skin, because that's the one that's real. to me that feels so right and so true. for a lot of reasons, but one of them is something about: if you don't feel like a real person you're never in ten billion years going to talk yourself into believing you're a real person. but if you manage to wind up in a position where you have to interact with the real world where things matter and you can't escape it anymore, eventually you will receive feedback that tells you you also exist. and the shitty parts help in this project too, because, like, you can't bruise a leg that isn't there, right?

#eliot being high king is me doing americorps after dropping out of college is basically what i am saying here #the magicians

[voidsumbrella]

𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗮𝗽𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 - haven, 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗶 - witch and wraith :3, 𝗰𝗮𝗶𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗵𝗮 - witchwraithhaven, and 𝗴𝗶𝗻 𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗲𝘆 - haven?

ehehehehehehe ty <333

𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗮𝗽𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴: what was one of your oc’s favorite tv shows/movies as a child? do they still enjoy it now? (haven)

oh geez, okay, so uhhh haven is 25 in the mid-90's, and as such would have been born in the 70's, and i have no idea what the general selection of children's programming would have been in fantasy!ohio during that time period, and im not well versed in making convincing fake media to bullshit the specifics. but i think he clung onto like, baby shows intended for really little kids for much longer than was cool- something something drawing comfort from the media he watched with his parents before they died even if he was too young to do so consciously- and only got away with it because he had younger siblings to babysit. he eventually got tired of being teased for immaturity and jumped to corny horror movies. he doesn't feel too much nostalgia for the little kids stuff, but he still rewatches some of the b-list slasher films he liked as a preteen.

𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗶 〜 does your oc’s name or design reference anything? i.e. music, movies, etc. (witch+wraith)

well you see. witch is named witch, because they're a witch. wraith is named wraith, because they're a wraith. hope this clears things up.

actual answer: name wise, they're both referential within the setting: witch's title- The Witch of the Absolute Nothing- is after their patron goddess, The Lady of the Absolute Nothing, who everyone in the entire multiverse assumes has been dead for several millennia now. this isn't the case, She's just in hiding, but that title being associated with witch serves for a nice redirection. their true name is a secwet :>

wraith's title- The Wraith of Between Spaces- is a fairly straightforwards reference to them being a ghost who can enter and freely travel through the gaps between universes, which is widely regarded to be a pain in the ass to pull off, how the fuck did they do that.

in terms of design, while i'm not intentionally referencing/mimicking anything with either of them, they're both a self-indulgent amalgamation of shit i think is cool and fun to draw. fluffy hair! bangs that conceal weird magical eyes! bouncy shapes! :3 face! + tall! longular! hair that is sleek but still has lines that go fwuaaaaa and sweep all over the place! different magic eyes! yknow. here 2 have a good time.

𝗰𝗮𝗶𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗵𝗮 〜 what does your oc’s voice sound like? (witchwraithhaven)

witch: imagine a beach that's mostly made up of fist-sized rocks, and the sound those rocks make as the waves pull and rattle them gently against each other; now take that sound and put it in the mouth a broadway actor who then settled down to become a radio show host. they sound like that.

wraith: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMHO49mD8H8 but like. human speech. perpetual 2am sleepover voice.

haven: a kind of birdlike high tenor; soft spoken out of politeness and/or low-grade anxiety, has the capacity to project pretty loudly when he gets Emotional. gets cartoonishly fast and high pitched when nervous, and is a prone to shrieking. uses a lot of filler sounds.

𝗴𝗶𝗻 𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗲𝘆 〜 what does your oc consider to be their best feature? alternatively, what’s something they’re most self conscious about? (haven)

best feature: his wiggles he's consistently pretty proud of his hair! the color is more attention-getting than he would otherwise like but it's very pretty and he's been cutting it himself since he was 14, and likes to think he's pretty good at it. he'd consider going to beauty school if even just thinking about the potential of getting yelled at for ruining someone else's hair didn't make him preemptively break out into a cold sweat.

self conscious: he's got some uh. fun scarring going on. he'll die of heatstroke before he lets anyone see his bare torso.

#austin we have a problem #iztopher #oc: haven #oc: witch #oc: wraith #oc set: deixis

[erstwhilesparrow]

a list of thoughts i am having, stated with no regard for their truth value outside of my head, under a cut for length:

i used to have icarus. and before that i had whoever was wearing glasses in a given cast. i had robots and dogs and the very clever black cats they like to have in fairy tales. i... don't anymore? it's like i've skipped out past the end of the lines that were written for me and now i look at myself and find [ERROR UNDEFINED]. i'm not, like, doing anything that i feel could meaningfully define me, and it's hard to tell where i end when i don't bump into people very much anymore. i don't really understand what people are getting out of their lives that makes them find death so unthinkable.

minecraft is really good for... symbols. big, sweeping gestures. it operates on the level of the operatic, the mythological. it suits c!emerald duo really well, i think. they suit their environment. i think a lot about the fact that 'waving' at someone in minecraft is a punch, really. violence is embedded / implied / implicated in even their body language. i'm thinking about how if you want to protect someone in this game, the most obvious way to do it is to put your whole body between them and danger. phil decides things are true about people, and then gets surprised-frustrated-unsettled when they are not that way. techno makes sense of his world through myth. in a fairy tale, you are only ever one thing. that quote about how in a story like that, form is function and function is form.

there's this podcast i listen to where a bunch of poets get together and discuss a poem like once a week, and i'm kind of delighted by the way they like to say a poem astonished them. the way they say it, it sounds so lovely. not a shock, or a scandal, but something warmly unexpected, something that disrupts your expectations and makes you glad of it. they have a way of looking at poetry, and perhaps the whole world, that feels (and now i'm quoting a news article about mary oliver) "tender without being soft". on one hand, i can imagine the infrastructure necessary to get to where they are at is not always accessible. on the other... i am not above wanting that for myself and for others. i am not above wanting to see the world with that much consistent tenderness.

actually, i'm thinking about that first bullet point again and this is fucking weird. nearly everything i think is true about myself is information from, like, three years ago. it feels like i haven't... updated since then? not really sure what to do with that, and odds are i won't be doing anything with that, i'm just suddenly struck by how much of my understanding of myself is based on outdated information. i... okay? for once, this isn't performance art. you'll just have to take my word for it here.

i think people get freaked out when you are very, very quiet. certainly, people were uncomfortable enough with silence when i was a kid that they would fill those spaces for me, going so far as to playfully narrate how silly i must have thought they were being, since i wasn't saying anything. the upside of this is that i am well-trained in the art of doing one (1) cool thing and then going radio-silent. this is extremely useful for convincing people that i am cool. it's also really funny, on reflection, though i'm not doing it on purpose. i've had people call me scary. something about perceived competence. i kind of like that, but i don't like making threats i can't back up. i have a suspicion that this is part of my interest in ropes. i would like to have the skills to back up that projection of competence, and being able to tie people up well / interestingly strikes me as very much a skill that cool and competent people have.

okay, i don't think there's anything else i can say that is going to feel like a genuine thought i am having right now, as opposed to a thought i've had enough times in the past that its expression has been engraved in my brain. but this was fun! i have no idea who this is directed at. i have a friend who told me i should write as though everything i produce is going to be read by my smartest friend. so i suppose that's what this is too. i am trusting your understanding here, if not of my thoughts directly, then of the fact that this is not a carefully drafted and revised post by any stretch of the imagination. (and this i know is because i'm in a funny mood, but maybe i love you. maybe this is one of those nights where i am heart-struck to be alive, and i love you.)

wait no one more thought: i should get to have pointy teeth and flappy ear-bits. for fun. ideal form should include bonus ways to express emotion, if desired. i am already jittery-nervous-snippy so much of the time; i should also get to have the cool aesthetic perks of being a weird bite-y little prey animal.

#sparrowsong #i know some of these things could be interpreted in alarming ways #i am genuinely fine #having thoughts out loud! without prompting! is this progress? i am hesitant to label it as such #but hey. i'm told saying words out loud is good for you. might be Something

[megatronswaifu]

a “g1 screenshot” of nightlight!

#tf oc #g1 #g1 nightlight #nightlight #maccadam #sunnyd #this isn't the MOST convincing but...it was a very very cool and fun project

[lunawoona11]

Whats all the brothers relationship like? Whats their dynamic if u know what i mean?

Buckle up cause this one is gonna be long.

Raph and Donnie-The youngest and the oldest. Donnie is acutely aware that Raph can be a walking trouble magnet(when he's not the trouble in question)and tends to try and keep and an eye on him. On the other hand, while Donnie knows he probably shouldn't be impressed by his brother's "I fear no god" attitude, it's hard not to be sometimes. Raph meanwhile appreciates his older brother’s resourceful nature and uncanny ability to get them out of danger. Due to Raph's Insomnia and Donnie’s tendency to stay up late working on projects, Raph tends to hang out in the lab when neither of them can sleep, sometimes they'll chat away the hours, but most nights it's just nice to hang out and do their own separate thing. Both can be stubborn at times, but it doesn’t result in more than the occasional minor squabble for most part. Raph is the one person in the family that actively enjoys Donnie's drum playing as opposed to just politely encouraging it.

Mikey and Leo-The middle children of the family. Leo's tendency to distrust overly nice people clashes with Mikey's dislike of assuming the worst about people, This of course, has led to disagreements on how to resolve situations. Mikey is also a terrible patient as he tries to sneak off because he gets restless easily; which drives Leo up a wall from worry and frustration. Leo will seek Mikey out to bounce ideas off when he's experiencing a writer's block, and they also share similar tastes in food as well as a stage magic phase when they were younger... though it was to varying degrees of success.

Leo and Raph- The red and blue duo. Raph hates taking medicine and will try and prolong the inevitable for as long as he can, despite this Leo considers him the best patient out of his brothers since he’s the one who's most likely to actually rest. Raph continually tries to convince Leo to get out of his April Fool's retirement and form an alliance with him... the day both of them agree will be the most terrifying day for the whole family, Leo is waiting for Raph to show him an idea that will prove he is ready. Raph's roller skates are actually Leo's hand-me-downs; Leo swore off skating after he lost his first baby tooth to it, Raph got the hang of it after losing a couple of his own baby teeth. sometimes, Leo will join Raph on his photography ventures, both to clear his head and spark some ideas, and to have the peace of mind of someone being there with his brother if something bad happens. Despite not being much taller, Raph likes to poke fun at his older brother’s height.

Donnie and Mikey- the purple and orange duo. When Mikey was 9, he asked Donnie if he could make him a ‘'cool robot arm' like those from the movies; the prosthetic he has currently is the 28th model. After Donnie made the first model, Mikey gave him his scarf, the one he still wears, as thanks. That model was unfortunately not waterproof, something Donnie had forgotten to tell Mikey, and it needed to be wrapped in a bag of rice pretty soon after. They like to play 1v1 board games together, mostly connect four, Donnie will drag out his turn as he gets absorbed by strategy, but Mikey always wins with the same strategy. As he believes, "If it isn't broken, don't fix it.". Mikey is very appreciative (and a bit guilty) that Donnie is patient in repairing his arm if he breaks it, but Donnie has never considered it a bother, and never will. They also share similar music tastes.

Raph and Mikey- The youngest brothers. Despite only barely being a year older, Mikey will still try to pull the “older sibling” card to try and impart some wisdom on his younger brother. Since Raph is his only younger brother, Mikey does try to be the cool older sibling…he gets points for trying. What Mikey doesn’t know is that he never needed to prove himself anyways cause Raph already admired him for his emotional intelligence. They have somewhat of a friendly rivalry going on the during training, which can extend to the battlefield by way of making it a competition. When they were younger, the two used to fight a lot, but nowadays the arguments tend to be short lived and they are quick to apologize. Both of them avoid horror films like the plague. Raph can’t understand Mikey’s love of bugs, finding the creatures freaky.

Leo and Donnie-The oldest brothers. Leo is the most successful of all the brothers at getting Donnie to actually go to bed. Leo is acutely aware that Donnie is the smartest person he knows, but that doesn't mean he knows what to do in every situation, so he tries to lend his assistance when he can. Donnie admires (and sometimes envies) Leo's ability to work under pressure. Leo has yet to beat Donnie in a spar, and really admires his skill. They disagree (rather vehemently) on pineapples on Pizza, and probably will for the rest of their lives. Both of them can’t cook to save their lives. When they were younger, they were almost the same height but Donnie shot up while Leo was condemned to the shorter twin existence. they bond over watching "unsolved mystery" shows together and are most comfortable venting to each other. Leo's very willing to listen to Donnie ramble about science though he doesn't always understand. All that aside, Donnie, unfortunately for Leo, is actually the worst at resting when he's sick and it drives Leo mad.

And as a bonus!

Splinter and the turtles-As Splinter was rather young and inexperienced, in the first few months of raising the turtles she was more like a frantic babysitter and less like a parent. Eventually, she found her footing as their mother. She tries to balance guiding her children and giving them their own free choices so that they can learn by making their own mistakes and triumphs. As such, she's always openly supported her boys' passions. If faced by a "greater good or your family" situation, she would choose her family without regret. Despite all this, she's never told her family she was once human, as she believed that children should never carry the responsibilities and burdens of their parents. She also encouraged Ninjutsu as a skill and taught them that there was never any shame in running away from a fight. Despite their contrasting opinions on the Horror genre, Raph will often join her in watching trashy reality tv shows. At Leo’s request, Splinter was the one who taught him first aid, and she grew up listening to the same type of music Leo does. Mikey likes to meditate with her and they sometimes work together on quilts(even when they don’t need one).She sometimes worries about her eldest; that his nonstop mind may serve to hurt him once he finds a puzzle he can’t solve.

This was a very fun ask to answer!

#Tmnt #Tmnt:unity #tmnt unity #tmnt au #tmnt incarnation #teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtles au #tmnt:u #Raphael Tang #Donatello tang #Leonardo tang #Michelangelo tang #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #tmnt leonardo #tmnt michelangelo #master splinter #splinter tmnt #tmnt splinter #tang shen #Tmnt tang shen #character dynamics #tmnt mikey #tmnt leo #tmnt raph #tmnt donnie #asks #my asks #Sorry for the delay with this one!

[ukaiknowsbest]

what do you think of gintama in general? is it really a masterpiece or just overhyped

My answer is BOTH. Here's why:

AS A WISH - GRANTING STORY

If you grew up on other wish-granting stories especially those from CLAMP, you realize that Gintama isn't that special. The formula is the same: there's a shopkeeper, there's a request, there's usually an apprentice (or two), they fulfill a request, sometimes their life is in danger, sometimes the solution isn't as straightforward as it should be, they finish the mission, they collect the reward. Along the way you discover the characters more, their pasts are revealed, their intentions are brought to the surface, they try to grant their own wishes, sometimes they succeed, sometimes they fail, sometimes it's in between.

If you look at GIntama that way then it's pretty standard fare. You read Getbackers, Petshop of Horrors, Mob Psycho 100, it's all the same thing.

AS A PARODY

Gintama's real strength comes from it being a parody anime. I can say that it's a masterpiece in that regard. I don't have much experience in gag series like this. But Gintama sure kicked it up a notch with the popculture references and making fun of tropes. Everyone from Sorachi, the editors, the marketing team, everyone must have been really ballsy and gutsy to let this work of art come through and be allowed to be published.

I'm saying this because I was so reluctant to start Gintama if not for the numerous prince of tennis parodies that they have done and because of sorachi and konomi-sensei's art exchange for Prince of Tennis 20th year anniversary. The parody aspect was definitely what sold GIntama to me.

I am still pretty impressed by the feat it has accomplished while taking advantage and making fun of all the things that came before it.

ON SORACHI AS A WRITER

Okay Gintama has 704 chapters and almost 400 episodes. and only about 30-40% of that is actual plot. Anyone with no patience would balk. It's a real btch to get into. People should understand that. Nobody has that kind of time nowadays. It's absolutely unfair to expect people to hang on that long.

That alone says a lot about Sorachi as a writer.

It is so clear, so damn clear that he didn't have a real idea for the plot, that he had no real goal all along. Bruh. GIntama has at least 4 alternate endings jfc. It's almost a miracle how SJ let him get away with all of it. Now this is not to say that he's a bad writer. He's different. He managed to convinced everyone in the project to let him just go with flow and deal with things when they happened. Maybe it's his charisma, or his skill but he managed to convince everyone to let Gintama happen and for that I have nothing but sincerest awe.

Now I am not an Shonen Jump expert. I don't read/watch a lot of SJ so I don't know how unique Sorachi is from all the others. I'm gonna talk from my experience being more immersed in seinen / shojo and sports anime.

Personally I like how Sorachi reuses ideas from older chapters and more foundational characters and incorporates them into later (and sometimes more serious) arcs. Good ideas should be reused imo. He gives good payoff most of the time. It's actually quite fun seeing concepts from comedy arcs being used in serious moments. Many of the characters aren't one-sided too. There are some exceptions but overall most of the character designs are good and well thought of. It feels very organic, very real.

It has one of the best depictions of war I think. I've talked about it in other posts. Actually i talked about all the cool things I like about Gintama in an older review that i did few months ago. I put the link at the bottom of this post.

ON BIGOTRY

Then again, Sorachi falls into the same old bigoted rhetoric that SJ is super known for. You see every kind of bigotry in Gintama and you remember that "ah yeah, a japanese man wrote this, surrounded by japanese male editors in a very japanese male dominated publishing company." All the bad '-isms' are in Gintama whether we like it or not.

I don't know if it was by design that it's supposed to make watchers uncomfortable. Maybe it does. It jokes around those bigoted -isms, yes, but we all know that for every joke there is a half-truth to it. Gintama reflects the situation/beliefs of japanese traditional society on the ground whether we like it or not.

Now I'm bringing this up because of the hype people give to it.

OVERHYPED

I do not know how Gintama is marketed in japan but most non-japanese reviews I've seen are talking about Gintama with an image that is wayy too wholesome that it should have.

Yes they tell you about the poop and dick jokes, yes they tell you about the parodies, yes they tell you about how it gets serious at the end, yess they tell you how badass the ladies are (and act like it's the epitome of feminism), etc etc. yada yada

the kicker?

they dont tell you about the bigotry. you suffer it for yourself. What's worse is they tell you that you're an overdramatic idiot and that you're too soft if you get bothered by the questionable elements in the show.

Most of the big gintama accounts do not welcome almost any criticism of the media and they bully people/call them names for having problems with characters and the plot "coz it's just for comedy! it's for fun!" nevermind if people are feeling actual discomfort.

It's disappointing really.

My verdict? The fandom leaves much to be desired. They are hyping gintama to unholy levels to the point that its core messages are forgotten. It's not only the fandom, The anime producers themselves do it. The merch team do it. It's not fun.

Gintama needs trigger warnings. Lots. It's the kind of series where you need to develop an acquired taste for it. You're supposed to grow into it, get used to it. People acting as if it should be loved on the spot and that there's nothing wrong about it are jerks and gatekeepers. :)

here is my first review post of gintama back in january btw.

#gintama #gintama thoughts #gntm hotcakes #i already made a review similar to this months ago #link to it at the bottom

[lovelivingmydreams]

Paper Flowers: one step forwards two steps back

Progress isn't always linear. And the setbacks can feel devastating. But it might still be worth it to try and move forward again.

A cute puppy jumps around excitedly, clearly asking to play, in a grassy field, on a sunny day.

Dad lays his hands to his heart. "Aw so cute!"

The dark Lord has his arms crossed, face partially hidden in the shadow of his pulled up hood. "Pathetic," he scoffs, not even looking.

A cat delicately washes her face. Dad gasps. "Elegant!"

Nemesis rolls his eye. "Obnoxious"

A horse prances around a meadow, hair flowing freely in the wind.

Dad stared on in awe and whispered: "Majestic."

Nemesis pinched the bridge of his nose. "Disgraceful"

Suddenly Dad jumped on a bench and pointed frantically at the ground. "Aaah spider!" he screamed.

Nemesis cooed as he knelt down. "Hello there darling!" He gets up, gently petting a massive spider.

Dad screams in horror once more.

 "Well, that was fun," Patton smiled nervously. Virgil looked up at his paternal colleague with a raised brow. The man's body language didn't exactly radiate "I just had fun" energy.

"Plastic spider got you spooked huh?" He mused as he returned his attention to his phone. Thomas just got done filming their character's collab video. Princey's latest very transparent attempt at helping Virgil get along with the others.

"A little," Patton admitted. "But still. I get why Roman enjoys making videos with you so much!"

Virgil suppressed a scoff. There was no real need to point out that it was just Thomas playing caricature versions of them. If Patton wanted to pat himself on the back for this he wasn't going to burst his bubble. So he just shrugged. "I guess," he muttered not noticing how Patton lit up at this small victory.

“Wonderful work you two!” Roman beamed as he entered the commons. Okay, so apparently there was a point in pointing out the obvious.

“Does everyone just forget that it is Thomas who plays these characters? Most we did was toss in a few suggestions. The vine is all you Roman, jeez!” Virgil complained, though he gave Roman the smallest hint of a smile. He wasn’t sure if Roman had started making an effort to give the others credit since they became friends, or if it was just a part of him Virgil only saw now because he spent some actual time around him without shouting insults at each other. Not to say they hadn’t had fights the past… Six months, man time flies. Anyway, their fights could get just as heated as ever. But now after they stormed off to their rooms to cool down, one or the other would eventually knock on the other’s back door with a movie or a snack and an apology. They’d talk things out and make up. It was much better like this. In the past when Virgil’s anger subsided he’d start panicking about… well, everything. Not talking about it afterwards, or even acknowledging that a fight had taken place… Yeah not great.

Roman just rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say Gloom Day. But what did you guys think?” he asked, smile back in place. Roman was already feeling good about today because Virgil had more or less openly complemented him.

“It was amazing Roman! I’m sure the fanders will love it too!” Patton gushed.

Roman gave a little bow. “Thanks padre. Your enthusiasm is appreciated as always.”

This time Virgil could not contain his snort.

“Something funny? Panic at the everywhere?” Roman asked, hands on his hips and a brow raised in challenge.

“Nice one,” Virgil allowed. “It’s just, why even bother asking him? You know he’s going to sing your praises. You can’t sneeze without getting a medal as far as Patton is concerned,” he pointed out.

“That’s not true,” Patton protested gently.

“Well, what did you think then? Oh, sinister one?” Roman asked expectantly, not commenting on the medal thing.

Virgil thought about that for a moment. “I guess it was sort of okay. It was rough on Thomas because Dad and Nemesis have very different energy, but he enjoyed it. The fanders probably didn’t expect the nemesis to interact with other characters,” he allowed, trying to sound reluctant. This time he did see that Patton was beaming. He was really getting too soft around the others.

“Evening everyone,” Logan greeted as he entered the commons. Making Patton get up to get dinner ready and Virgil contemplate whether he’d have dinner in his room or if he could handle a little more social interaction.

“Logan! How did you like today’s project? I am two for two and feeling pretty good, so no need to hold back your criticism,” Roman grinned. Logan cast his eyes to Virgil and then to Patton who nodded, clearly excited to confirm this.

“I see. Well while your intentions were rather transparent, it was a rather good experiment.”

Virgil sat up confused. Did… Did Logan figure them out?

“I don’t have any idea what you are talking about,” Roman grinned innocently.

Logan sighed and adjusted his glasses. “Fine. You ran a test to see how the fanders would respond to the characters loosely based on our personalities interacting. Anxiety and Patton are an interesting first choice. My character and Patton’s would have a more natural combined narrative, but it is effective none the less. I assume that if this gets positive reviews, you will propose other collaborations as well?”

Roman shrugged. “Maybe.”

Virgil felt kind of bad. Roman had promised to stop pushing the subject after things got to a blow with Patton after the whole ‘Marcus’ incident. He should have known that he wouldn’t intentionally push them together.

“Oh Roman! That’s a brilliant idea! That’ll definitely help Anxiety feel less nervous about the whole thing. Right Anxiety?” Patton asked kindly.

Virgil shrugged as he got up to set the table. Just to have something to do.

“You guys do whatever. I’m still not on board.” He didn’t expect them to get it. They represented what people liked about Thomas. His intelligence, creativity, humor, kindness, passion…

He was… as far as everyone was concerned, what hurt Thomas. And yes, he overdid it, a lot. He had tried to be better, honestly, but he couldn’t help who he was.

“We’ll see about that Doominator. I’ll win you over, just you wait. But what did you think Logan?” Roman insisted, pulling Virgil out of his thoughts.

“Well, until we have more data it is hard to say…” Logan started, but then he stopped to ponder. Roman was actively asking for feedback. He had even stated that he could handle it if it wasn’t entirely positive. Maybe he should reward that effort with some of his own.

“Though while I usually would stick with facts, if it is my personal opinion you are seeking…”

An eager nod from Roman confirmed this. Well here goes.

“You all know I am not most in tune with emotions and artistic endeavors. That being said, you did well. The classic broken pattern and the recurring theme of closing off a video including Anxiety and any other character with some form of screaming will almost certainly be well received by the fans.”

Roman was beaming. He had more or less expected someone to criticize the skit in some way, but they all really thought it was good. Maybe the Sanders Sides series could actually happen!

“Dinner’s ready! Thanks for helping out Anxiety,” Patton said pleasantly.

Virgil looked down at the table and found he’d finished setting for four. Guess he’ll be staying for dinner.

He sat across from Patton with Roman to his right and Logan to his left. Roman was brainstorming out loud while they ate dinner, occasionally encouraged by Patton or redirected by Logan when he veered of topic. Once or twice Virgil even muttered a teasing remark which had Roman pouting dramatically and the specs trying to hide their amusement.

It was nice, almost, normal.

He should’ve known then that something was heading his way.

“What do you say Florida Ghoul? Underrated Disney movie night?” Roman asked as they put away the dishes.

Virgil was honestly tempted. Almost all his favorites were in that category. Which Roman knew. They’d argued about the best movies often enough.

But if he started he might lose track of time…

“I have made you all suffer through enough of me I think. I’m going to head down, see what the others are up to.” Thomas was more or less dozing off in front of the tv, he should be fine going down. Maybe he could ask J for a movie night of their own.

“Night,” he waved as he made his way to the door to below. Suddenly he felt someone tug at his hoodie? He looked back, expecting Roman, but it was Patton, looking at him with big shocked eyes.

“Y-you’ll be back though right? We really don’t mind you staying. You don’t have to…”

Virgil raised his hands. “Wow, calm down. What made you think I was going to go back? Permanently I mean.”

Patton looked away, let go of his shirt and started fidgeting with his hands.

That told Virgil enough. He looked up to Roman and Logan. “What did Deceit do?”

Roman got ready to speak, but Logan beat him to it.

“About a week ago, after we first discussed Roman’s Sanders Sides idea, he made a brief appearance. He implied that he might take you back in if we didn’t do a better job of ‘handling you’. Roman and I already assured Patton that Janus has no such power without our aid, but he apparently has not been convinced.”

Virgil glanced to Roman who nodded to confirm that this was how things had played out.

He let out a tired sigh. “I can’t belief this guy. I’ll be right back.”

Before anyone could say anything he rushed down the stairs. His thoughts racing. Was this the first time Janus had tried to guilt the others into being his friends? Had Roman… No… No he couldn’t start down that path. Not yet anyway.

“Janus!” he called out as he entered the living room.

“Virgin!” Remus greeted excitedly. Virgil gave the chaotic gremlin he’d grown up with a quick wave.

“Leave us for a sec Remus,” he growled, not looking away from the yellow clad side.

Janus walked up to Remus, looking at Virgil with confusion.

“Why don’t you go hunt something for breakfast Remus,” Janus suggests. Remus didn’t need any more prompting than that. A second later they were alone.

"Virgil, what's the matter?"

Virgil worked a brow. "What do you think? Why could I possibly be mad at you?" He asked, wanting to give Janus a chance to fess up himself.

Janus took in his body language and expression. This was not the fury he'd expect if he'd somehow discovered Janus had been in his room when he wasn't there.

So that left... "Did the lights really tell on me?" He huffed trying to hide how worried that made him. He had no clue about the context. What did Virgil think happened?

"No. I said I was planning on hanging with you guys tonight with plenty of my usual self deprecating humor and Patton was worried I was planning on staying away. I figured you had something to do with that. Logan told me what happened because I asked," Virgil clarified.

"Now I want to hear your side. The truth J. Please." He really hoped the explanation wouldn't be as heartbreaking as the one in his head.

Janus took in a deep breath. "Okay, bit promise we'll stay on topic. No evading, no beating around the bush." Virgil nodded in agreement.

Janus studied his face for a moment until he was satisfied with what he saw. "Okay. Virgil you have been disappearing. I tried to check up on you a few times the past few months and you were just gone. I allowed you to go upstairs because I thought it would be better for you. But if they are erasing you... I needed them to at least try to keep you. I didn't know what else to do..."

Virgil groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm going to skip over the fact that you obviously entered my room while I was our, for now." He took a deep breath. It wasn't a surprise really. Janus and Remus both always just appeared in his room when they wanted to speak with him. So of course Janus had occasionally popped in to find it empty.

"I was probably in the imagination," Virgil confessed.

"The... why? How?!" Janus asked shocked.

"Roman gave me a little meadow to relax. Like 5 months ago I think. Not too long after the prince vs nemesis video's started. I go there when I need a break."

Janus stammered for a few seconds before letting out a utterly perplexed: "Why?"

That hurt a little. Was it that hard to belief?

"He only said he felt like giving me something. Maybe it was because I gave him some constructive criticism earlier and he wanted to try out positive reinforcement. You know he always overdoes everything," Virgil explained. There wasn't a single lie in his statement, so Janus believed him.

"But... he's not supposed to know..." Janus collapsed a hand in front of his mouth, realizing he said that out loud.

"What is Roman not supposed to know?" Virgil growled.

Janus took a small step back. "I... before I sent you upstairs I told Patton and Logan what I was planning and why. I wanted to be sure they'd look after you."

Virgil nodded. That made sense. "Why was Roman not supposed to know that?"

Janus couldn't look at Virgil. "I... told them I was worried what it would do to Thomas if you didn't move to a less stressful environment. I wasn't sure if Roman would be helpful or even more wary of you. So I blocked even the thought of telling Roman about our conversation from their minds."

Virgil was silent for a few moments. Somehow he felt a lot better about everything now. It all made so much more sense.

"Unblock it then," he muttered as he turned around.

"Virgil..."

"Unblock it. I'll see you guys next week or something. Maybe..." J had meant well after all... right?

"Virgil!" Janus called after him, but he was already halfway the upper commons.

When he walked in Roman, Logan and Patton were standing there waiting for him.

"Janus lied. So you don't have to pretend anymore. And you should be able to tell Roman," he said. Hands in his pockets, leaning casually against the doorframe. His old walks back in place. It was better that way.

"Anxiety... kiddo no. You..."

"Just drop it!" Virgil hissed in his tempest tongue, the briefest glimpse of his feral form was enough to make Patton stagger backwards into Logan. Roman was reaching out though. He was still on Virgil's side.

"I was getting sick of all this sappy family stuff anyway," he scoffed before leaving for gos room.

 Roman stormed into the meadow ready to break down Virgil's door if he had to. Virgil hadn't knocked not even once. But he couldn't be left alone with his thoughts now!

He was barely two steps inside when he spotted Virgil sitting there, a crown of purple daisies in his hand.

"You came," the anxious man breathed in relief.

Roman sat down next to him careful to keep enough distance but also be within reach.

"Of course," he said gently. They both knew ge wanted to defend Patton and Logan. To assure Virgil that they never did what they did because they feared he would be pushed to the edge and hurt Thomas in the fallout.

Virgil had explained to him that his discomfort around Patton was due to feeling like the moral side saw him as a ticking timebomb.

The reason for that was painfully obvious now. But how to make Virgik see that Patton was more distant than he wanted to be instead of more welcoming?

"I knew it was all too good to be true. The bubble was bound to burst... I told myself not to get too attached, cause it would end up hurting... I didn't realize... not until earlier. My room is almost back where I started Roman. I litterally pushed them away. And I thought... I thought I'd pushed you away too." Roman could tell Virgil had been crying.

"Preposterous. I'm much too stuborn to get rid if that easily," he assured Virgil. The darker side cracked a smile at that.

"I'm glad I was wrong about that..."

Roman nodded. Virgil had told him how much he hated being right.

"Did I ruin movienight?" Virgil wondered tensely.

"Well I don't know about Logan and Patton. But you and I are going yo watch all those tragically underrated movies."

And with a wave of his hand Roman set out an out doors movie theatre complete with snacks. The sky darkened and Virgil was handed a movie menu.

He smirked as he looked it over. Roman really did have to overdo everything. Including distracting him.

It was appreciated though.

@moonlightshow00 @naturallyunstablegamer @alias290 @meowthefluffy @riverdoesbadart @vpow @apinkline2715 @frida43 @tired-yeetling @firegirl156

Later Virgil would discover that his room was moved just a few feet closer to the upper level again.

Next: adjusting

#sanders sides #fic #ts sides #virgil sanders #roman sanders #prinxiety #ts virgil #ts roman #paper flowers au #patton sanders #janus sanders

[energyanon]

I feel like it's the cool thing to do, you know to make fun of him right now and I just don't feel like it. I feel sad for him because though I obviously don't know what's going on bts I can't help but feel he isn't doing too good. The way he was behaving at the restaurant with Leah was just too much and felt like him playing the role of happy go lucky guy...

Also, in one of your readings you mentioned that the people behind him were kinda cold, not all but some and that's just sad so I'll keep my thoughts positive and hope he finds true happiness soon, whatever that may look like.

Here’s the thing: Henry can do better.

Bar none, he can do better. He’s choosing not to do any form of healing or internal work. He’s choosing to make silly decisions. He is 38, at some point he needs to stop being babied and held accountable, and that is where this started. Fans expected better, he failed to meet that, and the reaction was jarring to people. When you used to love something and the rose coloured glasses are taken off, it’s jarring, you’re going to be emotional about it. You’re going to be nasty, that’s how it works. You feel angry and embarassed at yourself for giving so much time to something that turned out to be false, and you need them to feel what you felt. Classic projection. I’m actually angry at ME for feeling, so im going to be angry at YOU for making me feel that way. I don’t think anyone think that it’s become “cool” per say to make fun of him, I believe that we’re community based creatures, and we’ll always go where the group goes. It’s not “cool” it’s just where everyone is at the moment. And to not follow the group is to be shunned. A couple of weeks ago I was on the tag, and there were anons hassling long time henry fans saying “are you leaving the fandom i cant believe you still like him blah blah”, and those people had to say either they’re taking a break cause they can’t handle it, or they agree and they’re leaving. And all of this is over NV of all people. But that's the thing is we see all these things that people aren't doing, comparing them to ourselves saying "I would never" but you also were raised in an entirely different environment and family. HC seems to believe that being silent is the best way to go, probably because he was raised that way. He made one call out post and got the reaction he got: guess what he’s now learnt to never do that again. What’s he going to reform back to now? Being silent. I don’t feel that the people around HC are a good influence. I do feel that that isn’t helping his mindset, and he is being dragged down by said people, but he’s also not taking responsibility to change that. A member of his FAMILY is apart of his work and personal life, and he apparently made a production company with charlie. That’s all kinds of triangulation that I dont even want to get started on, and there’s two reasons to get involved with family and thats either 1. You want to help THEM, or 2. they’re in your ear convincing you. It is never a good idea to mix family with work, ever. He doesn’t make good decisions, but I do feel that that’s also because he trusts the people in his ear too much, and they have become like a family to him. That’s hard to let go of. Its really difficult. I don’t know anyone who has an easy time breaking it off with a long time friend or family member, I know i’ve found it near impossible. But I think he’s very heavily influenced by these close connections because he doesn’t want to lose them. I understand that getting involved in the drama is fun, and I’ve been there for sure up until even two ays ago i was still there, but now that I understand that what he’s going through is also tough, i’ve also realised that I need to have more empathy for the guy outside of readings too. It’s not nice to be in the place that he is. Ive been there I get what kind of person it turns you into. And it’s a huge turning point in your life aswell, you either let it consume you or you do your best to break free. He’s at a crossroads, i’ve said it before. Lets hope he goes down the path that’s best for him. All in all, I think people have a right to be upset, they’ve invested alot of time into the guy and got nothing back. I also think with that post yesterday that he’s actually trying his best. I don’t think its easy for him to self reflect, he’s not going to apologise for NV, she is his companion for now, he’s got some serious issues surrounding being loved/lonely, he’s not going to do anything to make her leave until he’s ok with finding someone else, which i feel like he’s kind of given up on at the moment? But he’s also still trying to juggle all these things in his life and his own mental health and the constant judgement doesn’t make that better. When people are loved and supported they’re the best version of themselves, right now he’s not being loved or supported. In fact he’s being hated by thousands of people, that’s going to take a toll on you. But to me, idk what it is, but it feels like he’s trying to mend things to be the best of his ability. (And his ability is still pretty poor in execution, and to be fair him talking about fucking protien shakes is more boring than paint drying and he should absolutely be dragged for that 😆 ) But it feels like a positive move. The level that the dragging is being taken is starting to turn into something else, but this is also how people express themselves. You can be apart of it or not, the pages that allow it are a good venting system, and fans deserve to have that, but there aren’t many places for it to also just be understanding, so that’s what this page will be instead. (But once again, understanding isn’t creating excuses, and I won’t create excuses for him. He is still held accountable, but without the drag) Even with this all being said, he still needs to do better. I stand by that, and I think that’s what most of the fans are trying to say (they’re just a little big angrier than i am about it, and that’s ok) Anyway I’m doing part 2 today so we’ll see how it goes with Fans/the post etc

[bumbershots]

A CERTAIN ROMANCE

CHAPTER THREE: WHO ARE YOU?

Author’s note: Hello! Once more I would like to thank you all for the love this story’s been getting, it truly blows my mind. I am also looking for a beta reader so if anyone out there is interested let me know! (: Let’s pick up right where we left off...

Story masterlist ** Word count: 2.3K **

Two souls don't find each other by simple accident, Harry thought after taking a seat for the first time that night, his feet were probably going to be swollen tomorrow, they were killing him already. But he wasn't keen on turning down a dance from the girl collapsing in the settee right next to him. A slow Amy Winehouse song was their cue to rest.

"Do you want a beer?" Her voice sounded a bit hoarse, probably from all the giggling and singing she did while dancing the night away.

"Yes please."

He watched her trot to the small bar on the other side of the flat, focused on how the multiple bracelets bounced in her left wrist as she instructed her brother which beer to give her. As she came back to take her previous seat, he felt a small wave of anxiety for wanting nothing more than to start a conversation with her, as she handed him the beer. Usually it was the other way around, but in most of the cases, people wanted to know his persona.

He knew the silence was becoming awkward, but he was still debating whether to ask about her upbringing or what she did for work, whatever the case was, he didn't want to make a fool out of himself, he almost never seemed to be that lucky.

"You're not used to people being calm around you, are you?" Alma’s frown os curiosity is a mirror to the one on the musician's face.

"Yes and no?" Harry's coy tone makes her smile warmly and shake her head in denial, "so, I'm Hampstead station guy?" Her eyes widen, a shy smile appears on her full lips before she takes another large sip of her drink.

"It's unlikely to find the same person thrice in the tube! I told my friend Laura, it felt like a glitch in the matrix." She answers and he lets out an amused laugh.

"For the record, I wasn't following you, at all..."

"I know, you just had to take the same line I did and it was a happy coincidence," she interrupts him, the new song gathers a few more dancers and Harry wonders if she will ask him to dance again, "although it would've made a great anecdote for my YouTube channel; story time, a famous musician follows me around the city possibly plotting my painful death." She joked as she gingerly flashed her hands before the two of them, as if presenting the latest play from the West End.

It was Harry's eyes turn to be wide and smack his hand into his forehead.

"You have a YouTube channel?" His interest was genuine and Alma made herself more comfortable on the sofa, before proceeding to fill him in about what that was about, just videos about her 'sort of interviewing remarkable people' or so she claimed.

It was something that started as a class project back when she was seventeen, trying to get good grades to win a scholarship and study abroad —none of those things happened. She kept doing it afterwards because it was too much fun, once she interviewed all her friends, she moved onto her family. "Believe me when I tell you, that I have more relatives than I should!" With a smile as big as hers, he sighed before breathing 'lucky' as his heart sped and she continued.

Restaurant owners, chefs, firefighters, barristers, doctors, accountants, waitresses, sexual workers, sex shop employees, bankers, homeless people, hairdressers and apparently every person from her home country had been on the informal interview series. Harry was impressed with the whole concept and her.

"I sort of abandoned it a little when I moved here last year, it was crazy busy the first couple of months and the whole bureaucracy... and I was a little homesick to be honest." For the first time in the night, her voice is thinner, he has to lean in a few inches to hear better, "I miss my parents, my cousins, my aunt, my grandparents. But this is something I've wanted for the longest time you know?" Her eyes bore into his, allowing him to see the vulnerability swimming in them, "I've never felt like an outsider here, never got lost in the tube, took the wrong bus or anything like that. Isn't it weird?" Harry smiled at the sentiment, thoughts of his latest trip to Japan flashing before him.

"No, I think it's marvellous that you feel that way." He cannot be real, is the only thing running through her mind like a restless hamster in its wheel.

Harry and Alma talked about everything they didn’t have in common, despite the brief interruptions to do some shots and drink champagne with the birthday boy. Their families were discussed, their favourite things to do in the summer. Alma even asked him how was work going, as if she didn’t know that he was one of th world’s most successful artists. Harry was thrilled to joke through their drinks and the girl wasn't shy to ask him for a couple more dances. None of them noticed the partying dying around them, it was only after Fernando said his goodbyes to his laughing sister, that they noticed how late/early it actually was.

Before they knew it, golden hues streamed through the window behind them as Freddie walked out of his room and offered them coffee.

"I'm never drinking straight vodka again," Freddie mumbled to himself after finishing his cup of coffee.

"At least it wasn't Vodquila like last time," Alma's words make him groan but agree. "I should go now, need a shower and a healthy breakfast."

After Harry also admitted he needed to be on his way, with all their belongings gathered and after saying goodbye to a very ill Freddie, neither Harry or Alma looked forward to their imminent separation. He had spent hours hearing how busy she is, when not recording content, she was working at Wenzel's and teaching Spanish to her neighbour's daughter on the weekends. Still, he was determined to meet with her again.

As soon as they started moving down the street, Harry noticed the next one was where he had to turn right in order to go home. It wasn't a short walk but the most effective route for sure.

"So, the bus stop is that way," Alma nodded her head to the left, smirking knowingly as she stuffs her hands in her coat pockets.

"Of course," they had come to a rolling stop at the corner. Harry suddenly felt beyond nervous about asking the girl for her phone number. "Thank you, for keeping me company last night." It was amazing he wanted to add, but licked his lips quickly instead.

"You mean keeping you from catching up with all your friends," she corrected him.

Harry shakes his head and smiles, the dimples graciously adorning his cheeks, his racing heart giving him the last push needed to finally ask. "Do you think we could go, like for coffee... sometime?” With that she laughed, immediately memorising the sound of it, her loud cackle is one of the nicest things he has heard in awhile.

"Only if I can buy you something from the selection of pastries." Harry laughed loudly, completely relieved by her answer. She dug around her purse for a moment before taking out a pen and what seemed to be an old receipt, quickly scribbling down her number and handing it to him.

"I'll call you," he beamed, carefully placing the piece of paper in his wallet. He'd be an idiot to lose such a precious fragment of information.

"Looking forward to it," Alma smiled at him for one last time before she started walking to the opposite direction. "See you around Harry." His face was a bit puffy from not having slept properly, but she would be lying to say he didn’t look adorable at the same time.

He waved and watched her walked away, her sweet and tired morning smile seemed to be engraved into the musician's mind as he headed home.

The air was still a bit cold, but the heat was starting to rise and plague London for the rest of the day, the hot summer everyone's been yearning for was finally here, even Harry could feel it in his bones as he continued down his path. He was still highly enamoured by the amazing night he spent sharing a piece of himself with Alma. His feet felt heavy, were even burning a little, but it was nothing as he made his way through his home gate twenty minutes later.

He decided to get some toast and a cuppa for breakfast, his high spirits not faltering even one bit although he could feel the consequences from the all-nighter already with each yawn. After eating he decided to take a shower that got him ready for a well deserved sleep in his comfortable bed.

Waking up around six o'clock startles him at first, Harry is well rested now but a bit grumpy for the weird taste on his tongue, something usual after drinking beer. He scolds himself for not brushing his teeth earlier as he walks in his bathroom. The cool tiles against his bare feet wake him up a bit more. After some needed dental hygiene, Harry gets dressed to go out and pick up his sister for their weekly dinner. Hopefully he can convince her to stay in, that way he can go on and on about the events from the night before.

His feet still hurt, he can even feel a blister underneath his big toe. But it doesn't bother him, it's actually a nice reminder of the incredible things that miraculously happened. Harry knew that since Alma was related to Fernando, someone that was bound to be in his life for the next six months or so, there was a big chance they would've met at some point. But he'd rather think it was fate, some sort of good karma coming round, he stared at her contact on his phone, still charmed by the fact that she gave it to him on the back of a receipt. Ignoring that she only did it that way, because the thought of asking for his mobile to enter it herself, was a very bold move. And Alma wasn’t really that confident, not when his green eyes were boring into hers anyway.

"When are you gonna call her then?" Gemma's voice snaps him out of his daydream for the third time during their quiet dinner in her flat. "What is it? You've got that look."

"What look?" He asks before his sister frowns and pinches her bottom lip with her thumb and index finger. It's his nervous quirk, he sighs, "I don't know, I'm just so nervous." Without a valid reason, he knows the girl is so lovely, maybe that's why.

"You're afraid of fucking it up," she knows, Harry nods. "Well, you could tell her that, perhaps on a text—

"—I want to call her, texting her will make me feel a wanker." Gemma smiles at her little brother, he looked uncharacteristically unsure of himself but nonetheless excited. It was endearing how the first thing he told her after crossing her home's threshold was 'my life is officially a chick flick!' Before proceeding to explain with detail about the whole situation.

"What about a text that reads: hello, this is Harry please save my number so when I find the guts to call you, you don't think it's a telemarketing scam," Gemma might be joking and mocking him all at once, but has a point. A text so she also has his number, makes the situation more even, she can call him too. "Assuming she gave you a real phone number."

"What?" Harry is mortified.

"I'm kidding, you should've seen your face," his sister wanted to drag a bit more her joke, but the preoccupied look on his face stopped her. Gemma couldn't wait to tell their mum, knowing that she would be just as absorbed. "There's nothing wrong with showing interest right away. If you want this to be honest and genuine, set an example." She finished before taking the last bite of pizza.

Harry knew that to be true, but now he was left wondering if it was the right time for him. Had he really left behind all the ghosts and baggage from his past? Or was he still carrying them in the new tattoos of his knees?

Despite his sister's encouraging words about how nothing could go wrong this early with Alma, he couldn't help but wonder if his still grieving heart was ready.

He takes his time walking back home, not caring if it was a really long one, he was aware of the curious eyes once he reached the Southbank but paid no attention to them. He welcomed the chill breeze, hoping for it to cool his boiling mind. Remembering the last time he walked along the river arms around his former flame, her laughter still ringing in his ears, her tender kisses in his knuckles, her delicious scent flying away with the airstream into London's sunshine.

Missing someone is not wrong, Harry reminds himself.

There's no point going down the rabbit hole of what ifs about their relationship. Harry can admit his mistakes, no matter how hard it comes to him, he can also apologise wholeheartedly. He did all those things already, months ago. Which is why he was able to keep her as a friend, not a close one, more like an acquaintance. And she's happy, he can see that, knows it.

Why does he feel like he's still drowning? He's already been pulled from the vast ocean of hers. Harry groans, struggles to open his gate, his good spirits from this morning nowhere to be found.

He doesn't know if it's the memory of her, the fear of loneliness, coincidence and laziness, or a bad habit? But he doesn't text the girl with warm brown eyes, instead he plays the voicemail that sometimes haunts his nightmares, on repeat, for the rest of the night.

///

Let me know if you like the story! *** Join the taglist!

///

TAG LIST: @laurxn-robinson // @mellamolayla

Next chapter

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles oc #harry styles series #harry styles #harry styles fan fic #harry styles fluff #harry styles fandom #harry styles fanfic #a certain romance #harry styles ou

[breakfree-mental-help]

List of Crisis Resources 911

MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS🚻🦋 ADVERTISEMENT RIGHT HERE! 🌼🍁

This is an emergency list put together for all ages of men and women from all over the world to use. This is a great resource and long advertisement about the mental health awareness program I am starting up again. I have my desk all cleaned up and am ready to work hard(yes! During the summer even!) Did you know during the summer months there is a higher rate of suicide in young mothers with depression. Also in teen boys with addictions. These facts cannot be ignored! I stand up for all of the struggling families and any one who has or knows someone with a minor disability or a mental health issue of some sort. We need to come together and share this post to get the word out there that someone does care ALIT for these poor people suffering in silence. I refuse to eat a meal until I have helped at least ONE person today! This hunger strike started last night and it's been 23 hrs, so I'm really hungry but I refuse to eat until you know what so someone better talk to me about their problems right now and also:

DO NOT SCROLL PAST THiS POST: THUS IS INPORTANT INFORMATION FOR YOUNG WOMEN AND MEN OF OUR COUNTRIES IN THIS WORLD, COME TOGETHER ONE LIVE ONE WORLD LETS PRAY FOR THE LOST SOUKS AND TRY TO GET THIS BOOSTED! To BE SERN BY as many people as possible especially with a special date coming up on the 26th of June but I cannot spoil the surprise! Just help me get this word out there to everyone and anyone! Tell your best buddies on here to reblog it for us please guys. I want to reach as many troubled people as possible do I can at least gave s neal before I starve to death because I'm not joking I'm really on a hunger strike until someone dies some of my work books and at least gas a 5 min convoy to shoot the dhit with me and feel better about their life, this trust me , is s great great opportunity for literally everyone and anyone! What is there to lose? I'm a psychic and I read tarot that is great therapy I feel p,yes if you are more interested in art projects I have sigil creating projects for you to do, as well as other crafty witchy things that are useful and beneficial to your mentl state plus I own a copy of the famous therapeutic story book coloring book (I forget what it's called but it's totally for anybody you do not even need to be creative!) And if you're looking for something with more depth then I've got tons and tons of stocked up files of CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy) and even DBT(dialectal behavior therapy) or if you want work sheets but dont want to go too deep(I gotcha covered)!

Emergency lines:CRISIS (#911) OR 411 in North America.

Source: http://aminoapps.com/p/kenrra >>>♡-If you a absolutely do need a friend to text with and are up for it feel free to TEXT my personal peer support worker line @1 [phone] and make sure you start the convoy by pressing the code into us so we know we have an emergency call to be on duty for and to drop all spiritual and other mental health clinician work at the Canadian organization for breaking free emotionally @[email protected]

the code you need to send us right away first text is:

☘🌍It's always Friday when you call us! We keep the party in life and bring out the best in every client we come in contact with ! That's a promise! If you arenot satisfiedafter 2 weeks of working at our mental health .org program sheets weekly attendance is required and participation in your treatment plan is a must. But if you sincerely just want to chat once for w5 mins toget so nothing off your chest and get a professionals opinion we will promise you'll sigh a big breath of relief after our conversation! Cool cats dance to this live beats of the drum. Random I know. Just checking if your paying attention. Heres a cat...and dont get FRIDAY EVERYDAY! JFK ya! 🔜➡️♣️🃏

+1788 or for a Male youth offender worker dial the text code : +4112 to us so we can have Kyle speak with you personally.(do not worry about the plus sign in front of the number for your emergency call or text we just put that to say that you have to PRESS whatever number to switch telephone lines and just decide which worker you wish to speak with for your emergency this time.

No emergency is too large or too small we can handle them all and give out great spiritual advice as we go along. If you are a certain religion please state that fact in the beginning because a large portion of our personalized care program deals with opening up spiritually.

🥀🃏 Do not be shy we have heard it all trust me. I work at the county prison as a peer support worker during the long winter months and council the troubled adult inmates and get them to participate in all sorts of fun activities that range from artistic therapy that has a purpose usually or even spirit work .ike for example I do free tarot readings for youth offenders who are repeat offenders and I try to change their attitude, its nice to volunteer there doing that sort of thing. You need to open up totally to this process, trust this process and just let lose because you're going to end up having wome fun and forgetting about your problems for a bit.

But then we do focus on the main issue at hand of course it's not all escapism, but I believe in the art of distracting the mind from hurt and painful situations.

And please do not hesitate to text at very odd hours we are totally dedicated to saving lives and we are here for you. We have so much new cbt and bshavior therapy work books to share with any one in need of a bit of freedom from their emotional trauma and/or illnesses . We are highly skilled trained professionals that gave dealt with the worst possible cases of schizophrenia in patients and really bothered bipolar people so dont worry, your problems will be simple to figure out. We just need to do the Mental Health.org programme and get you well again!

We get back to you within 1 hour of your message or sooner, but 1 hour at the latest. So we are super fast responders.

If you are honestly considering suicide please do not do it until you have read this post and at least tliked od texted ond or two of the numbers on the suicide list for yourself and see how you feel, if you still feel the same I give you this challenge: just for today , do not do it, not until it's the right time. You have to af least allow me to try to convince you otherwise about life today before you try to hurt yourself. That's the deal. K. You be patient. Hear me out. Just see if what I'm saying makes sense(!not now but when we text) I have a feeling you'll put down your weapon over choice of your idea of how yoyd debit because I have lots to tell you. I'm only one text away. You got my personal on-duty sock number now, man. That pretty specil. Bsczyse I care. Let's text all night? I'll tell you some secrets to life.

If you prefer to chat by e-mail I have my professional inbox open all day long for all clients from all over the world. But I mostly work in my base at the mentl health clinic as a peer support worker during most days 20 hrs a week! So I am pretty AVALIBLE. Here is my e-mail and my names Divinaedruin Jaxson okay call me Mrs. J. Or just Jaxx if you want to.

@ [email protected] ○<< x x x X x x x x x x x x

My name isn't important but you actually can call me Mrs. JAX OR just J or if you feel comfortable you can even call me by my nickname "JaxsonStoney" I am very easy to speak with I do not judge anyone for anything. I understand that we all have our reasons for doing certain things. But that doesnt mean we cannot learn and grow more wise from the mistakes and hardships we have encountered and make us a better much stronger person than we never could have dreamed of being! You are the star of your own movie play your part well, and what do you want to be remembered for? Is there any changes you feel you need to make? I think I'd gladly be able to set up a new goal plan with you if you are ready to break free. And are you truly wanting to be like a butterfly or s be high up in the sky able to fly because your so free? I have z natural remedy and a cure for all known diseases and disorders known to man. Time to move on. You ready? Let's go. In my office waiting for your text; ) ☆♡□🥀🕸🐞♦️🃏🍁🦋♣️🎱ℹ⊙♤◇Xx

@Divinaedruin

#fullmoon #strawberrymoon #2019 #feminist #healing #healing arts #health & fitness #hello #hello world #hello! project #summer 2019 #free tarot request #tarot #free tarot reading #tarot reading online psychic' #mental health work #cmha #law of attraction #positive vibe #positive vibes #good vibes #good vibe quotes #life quotes #inspiring quotes #inspiration #spiritual #self help #self healing #crystals #pagan