#this week has been a lot

[bun-after-dark]

God I love soft dumbification. The “let your thoughts go, you don’t need them” and “no thinking, that’s for me to do” I have to just obey when they’re being so sweet about it. How could I not let my brain be wiped when you’re so polite in telling me?

#this week has been a lot #I really just wanna #Not be here rn #being lost in someone else would be nicceee #text #my post #dumbification #nsft #t4t nsft #t4t sub

[innocuoussketches]

Genesis

#homestuck #john egbert #happy 4/13 #innocuous sketches #obviously this is a quick sketch but i am super proud of myself for getting something out #this week has been a lot #anyways #i still love homestuck and think fondly and often of it and the people i met through it

[wahgifs]

what do you want? it depends on what you can offer me. love in the air episode 8

#asianlgbtqdrama #bldramaedit #love in the air #love in the air the series #peat wasuthorn #fort thitipong #thai drama #here i come the day of episode 9 with my episode 8 gifs LMAO #of which there won't be many because #this week has been a lot #:( #these two are so pretty #how is this cast so pretty??

[adrift-in-thyme]

If anyone sees me on here this afternoon answering asks or posting stuff…no you didn’t. I’m definitely not allowing myself a cheat day

#this week has been A LOT #and I’ve been missing my tumblr moots #so hi everyone #here I am #this isn’t an end to my fast or anything #just me going off for a sec lol #trin rambles #also…I’m gonna do febuwhump so you know #I might show up here again just to post a fic and then drop off again XD

[thisismyobsessionnow]

Good morning!

I somehow ended up barricade by Jan again last night????? Wasn't really what I had planned, or thought I could achieve, but I'm very happy I went for it!

I have a few videos, I haven't looked through them yet but I think I unfortunately had a lot of glare from the lights so I'm not sure they'll be worth posting. I'll go through them later when I've gotten myself in order and I'm on my way to Spain.

#joker out #i'm still so tired #this week has been a lot #probably going to end up sleeping all day tomorrow

[doll-princesse]

t minus 9 days til the ďòłļë show.

this weekend I’ll wake up early to protect my wake up time, and I’ll get in a some radio taisei and an indoor walking workout, and spend the morning finishing her dress and making some new fancy bloomers. addy 💙💙💙💙

#im really glad i got a head start on addy’s outfit #this week has been a lot #ningyou posting

[indigosunsetao3]

Today has been todaying.

It's one of those where I'm one ‘pocket getting caught on the door handle’ away from just fucking losing it.

I just want to write this things and maladaptive daydream about my ideas. Goddamn adult job.

Send me asks. I have social obligations this evening so I can’t truly sit and write but I can do short little things or answer questions💙

#ask me things #send me asks #asks #I need to disassociate for a bit #this week has been a lot

[carladuquette]

I’ve been meaning to write this, and I have also been avoiding to write this, because it’s kind of embarrassing. But here it goes.

On Tuesday, I cried in my ED counselor’s office (this is NOT the embarrassing part!).  I was upset that I had already been doing better and I am now doing worse. Feels like I took a step or three backwards. And I was also worried that she was going to be disappointed in me because I hadn’t managed to hang on to what we talked about in earlier sessions. Here’s what she told me. Ready?

Healing is not a straight line.

If you know me as the Close your eyes writer, you know why me having to be told this is funny/embarrassing. If not I’ll get there in a sec. But that’s what she said to me. She even drew it on a piece of paper, going “healing doesn’t look like this“ (draws a straight line upwards), “but like this” (draws a wavy up-and-down line). 

The thing is: I literally wrote about this very sentiment for more than 2.5 years. I wrote a long (looong) fanfiction, about a character trying to heal from trauma and this, healing is not a straight line, was something she had to learn again and again over the course of the story. Because I wrote that for her! I don’t know how many times I’ve used the exact words my counselor used talking to readers in the comments. And yet I have difficulty applying it to my own life. Wild how something can make so much sense for another person and yet you cannot show yourself the same grace.

And to come back to the crying - I tried to hold my tears in and didn’t full-on sob, which was quite the effort. My counselor told me to let it all out. Which I couldn’t do and kind of regret, because my plan to just swallow it down in the moment  and let it out at home didn’t work. Once I’d made it home, I couldn’t cry anymore and I think it would’ve done me good. I literally wrote a scene in my fic where the protagonist hides her face in her hands, so her therapist doesn’t see her tears. And the therapist tells her that she shouldn’t waste her energy on trying not to cry or to hide it, that it’s OK to let it all out 🙃

TL;DR: Healing is not a straight line. It’s just not. You will do better, and then you will do worse and then you will do better again. It sucks when you’re in one of the valleys on that wavy line, but you’ll go up again too. (Trying hard to hang on to that rn.)

Cry in therapy! It’s OK. 

#ed recovery #this week has been a lot #when she was drawing the lines i was like damn i know this why did i need to hear it again #healing #it’s not a straight line! #try to be kind to yourself

[yoonia]

Expectation: it's the weekend! I'm gonna be up all night to write and finish this

Reality: slept for 12 hours

#damn...I was TIRED tired #this week has been a lot #the lack of sleep because of work and life and stress are catching up on me #but I'll be writing all day today #so pray for me #coffee thoughts

[vampireknitting]

So it's been like an official year since I had the iud removed.

Occasionally, I get a lil depression blip, but nothing like what the pills and the iud had triggered. In this year, I have come to learn that the fake hormones make me suicidal. I'm still not sure what to do with that other than be sad at how long I was pressured to stay on them, especially since I started taking them when I was 16 or so. 11ish almost 12 years on these depressants.

I have had very regular cycles since the removal which has been lovely. First day kicks my butt but I don't feel as crippled by it like I once was, even with endometriosis and ovarian cysts. But I believe that's thanks to my wonderful darling giving me the ability to be a homemaker.

Had my first pregnancy scare. That was interesting. While we'd welcome babies with open arms, we do not live in a place where we can raise them. And I say them because ya girl here has like an almost certain chance of having twins. My bio father is a twin, and it's my generations turn. I learned that if your first pregnancy is twins, you're likely to have more twins with every pregnancy. So, like, I find it a tad scary. Both of my sisters could also have twins too so like that's a thing that could happen.

#iud bs #just some thoughts #this week has been a lot

[horny-plushy]

after this week, i need to get high and have someone fuck me until i cant think about anything but their cock. that's all i need

#plushy posting #this week has been a lot #and i feel like a pretty girl with a cock would fix my problems #bottom posting #bottomposting #hornypost #hornyposting

[spacejammie-eimmajecaps]

Two hours ago I was having horrible stomach pain, and now that I've puked up all my dinner and am finally starting to feel better, my stomach is gurgling hungrily like it did nothing wrong.

As if I'm leaving it charge of any more food tonight.

Be empty for a while and think about what you did, punk.

#like i experience pain on a regular basis and dont generally get too upset over it #but i was straight up crying #and i only i cry maybe 3 or 4 times a year #it was that bad for almost an hour and it didnt get better until i finally gave in and puked up everything in my stomach #gastroparesis doesnt cause me trouble that often but when it does its a bad fucking time #im gonna have to do a liquid diet tomorrow just in case my stomach isnt done acting up #which sucks because im so hungry #this week has been a lot

[nightcoreraver]

me, having a REALLY shitty week: :(

artist i commissioned: here’s some art of sharky + rook and they’re really cute and comforting

me, now having a slightly less shitty week: :)

#i just #this week has been a LOT #barely holding it together rn #but i’m now fawning over this art it’s so fucking cute #needed some sharky comfort fr #sharky boshaw #deputy rook #far cry 5

[anthrofreshtodeath]

Simply no 🙂

#this could be about so many things in my life right now #this week has been a lot #but tomorrow is Friday!!

[themultiversefox]

Today was utterly exhausting and, unfortunately, I haven't had much time to work on my pieces, so have the product of me struggling to understand Nexus Mods.

#Finally became a dragon on a very laggy computer #and enjoyed a fun birthday party with friends #this week has been a lot #multi rambles #Skyrim SE #Skyrim mods #Nexus Mods #Play as a Dragon SE

[nottheweirdest]

My holiday hedgie fic will be arriving later than planned. I've had a series of unfortunate events and haven't been able to write for several days 😭. I'd love to post the next chapter of Coming Home tonight, but it might be tomorrow night. That'll be my next chance at 'free time.'

Life got me 😵‍💫

#this week has been A LOT #and it just keeps on coming #its fine tho #everything's fine #my writing #holly rambles 🙃