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#tony loves his coffee
buckyalpine · 6 months
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Imagine jealous!sharon want to get you out of the way so she can be with Bucky…
She hurts you (even it’s like a bruise) and Bucky begins to be so protective of you 🥺🥵
ABSOLUTELY.
I'm imaging this with a soft sweet reader and fuckboi Bucky. Hear me out, okay.
He's not looking for a relationship at all, finally feeling a sense of freedom after getting a bit of himself back. He's so flirty with everyone, so charming, he knows he can get whoever he wants.
He fucks.
A lot.
Sharon eats it up, loving the smirks he gives her, his playful baby blue eyes always sparkling. She loves the naughty way he bites his lip and don't even get her started on how gorgeous he is when he works out shirtless. His Brooklyn accent comes out when he calls her darlin' and it makes her weak in the knees.
There's just one issue.
The looks he gives Sharon aren't special. She's not the only one he calls darlin', even the old lady at the coffee shop shares the same pet name. Bucky can't help the little smirks he tosses around to others, flirty compliments naturally falling from his lips. He's a bit of a heart breaker but it's who he is.
That's just Bucky.
That's Bucky with everyone else.
Then there's Bucky with you.
The quite lab assistant who worked at the compound.
He didn't have it in him to playfully flirt with you when you asked about his day. He actually liked talking to you, finding any excuse under the sun to keep the conversation going, poking at the little nick knacks you have on your desk so he doesn't have to leave so quickly.
Sharon hates the way he looks at you. Whenever he's around you, he looks at you with puppy eyes as if he's wondering how someone so sweet could possibly exist. She catches onto the way he's not the same with you as he is with others. He's called everyone in passing darlin' with a drawl of his voice but you're his doll. He's never used that with anyone else. That's reserved just for you.
She can't stand it.
At first she tries to pick you apart in subtle ways' maybe you'd finally realize you had no business talking to someone like Bucky.
"You're so pretty even though you wear glasses"
"Don't worry, that dress would still look good on your body type, its meant to suit everyone"
"I wish I was as brave as you to wear that! I'd love to have that much confidence but I could never"
She smiled sweetly while you pulled your lab coat closer together, clutching it tightly in your hand. Your heart sank to your stomach. You'd worn one of your favorite dresses, one many others had always said you looked perfect in but some how Sharon made you doubt that, despite her sugary smile.
Then she took it a step further to make sure you were more isolated, insisting you'd be uninterested in plans when the team wanted to go out. Purposely giving you extra work when they had drinks together. Anything to keep you sad and holed away in your lab while she kept Bucky all to herself.
She'd do anything to get rid of you.
She was almost certain everything was going accordingly to plan, inching closer and closer to Bucky during a movie night until she was pressed against him, sharing his blanket. Not that Bucky noticed since he was more distracted over the fact that Sam was also squished against him on the other side of the small couch. Sam was also buried under the now too hot blanket, his deep snores irrupting the movie having fell asleep on Bucky's shoulder.
"Damn bird brain" Bucky huffed, ignoring the fact that he pushed Sharon off while reluctantly adjusting himself so Sam's head wouldn't slip, shaking his head when Sam grumbled, trying to snuggle into Bucky more.
"Bet you wish that was y/n, huh" Tony wiggled his eyebrows and much to Sharon's distain, Bucky blushed. Not did he deny it.
It didn't matter though. She'd find a way to get Bucky's attention, it wasn't like you were real competition anyways. She figured you'd have the sense to like someone better suited for you, someone in your league, definitely not the very handsome Sergeant.
That was until she found out you had a crush on the super soldier yourself. You'd let it slip out during a conversation with Nat, not realizing there was someone near the lab. Sharon didn't think you actually had a chance with Bucky but it didn't matter.
At this point she didn't care about what it took.
She was sick of the way Bucky was soft over you.
So she took a more direct approach.
"Y'know, I heard someone has a little crush on a certain super soldier" Sharon smirked, wandering to your table, tinkering with one of your tools while you looked at her like a deer caught in head lights.
How did she know?!"
"I-I don't-
"Oh please y/n, everyone knows" the blonde rolled her eyes at your gaping mouth before continuing, "I just thought I should let you know that he's not interested"
You felt like you had been punched in the stomach, the hurt expression on your face made her satisfied,.
"Oh" Was all you mustered out, embarrassed beyond belief while she shrugged. You blinked back tears while Sharon squeezed your shoulder out of faux concern, handing you a tissue.
"I'm so sorry, honestly I just thought you should know because he likes me. And I like him. So it would be best for you to move on, because were seeing each other" It didn't matter if it was a lie because she intended on making it real soon enough.
From that day, you avoided everyone in the compound like the plague, throwing yourself into work, feeling ridiculous for having even thought of Bucky that way. Of course he'd never go for someone like you, you should've known that from the start.
Sharon's plan was short lived after she overheard Bucky worriedly asking Tony about where you'd been all week since he hadn't seen you. After some endless teasing, Tony reassured him you were fine and just busy with lab work, not knowing the true reason as to why you'd overloaded yourself.
Sharon despised the pink that decorated Bucky's cheeks whenever someone said your name.
She hated that she'd seen him walking by the lab hallway in search of you.
She'd do anything to end all of this.
Including hurt you.
-
You made your way down to the gym hoping to sweat some of your unrequited feelings away, putting on your headphones before hopping on the treadmill. Sharon walked in moments later, blonde hair pulled into a sleek ponytail, her toned body on full display in nothing but a sports bra and some tiny shorts.
You felt even worse.
You tried to stay hidden, deciding 15 minutes would be enough, though your escape was cut short with Sharon caught your arm just as you were about to leave.
"How about we spar for a bit" She smiled sweetly, giggling at your confused expression. You'd never sparred in your life, in fact this was probably the third time you'd even used the gym the entire time you'd lived at the compound.
"Sharon, I-I don't think that's a good idea, I've never-
She cut you off, dragging you to the mat, practically shoving you to the middle with more force than necessary.
"It's fine! I mean, it's good for you to learn since you work here n'all C'mon, I'll help you and show you what to do" Before you could say anything, Sharon had flipped you onto the mat, twisting your arm behind your back without warning. You gasped in pain as she gripped harder, pulling further up your back until she heard your joints crack.
"Let-let go" You winced out, confused over what part of sparring this was, your body hitting the floor when she released her grip.
"Ops" Sharon pouted with faux innocence, taking a long sip from her water while you hissed in pain, seeing the formation of a bruise already forming on your arm.
"SHARON"
Sharon squeaked in surprised at the loud voice that boomed through the gym, bouncing off the walls. Her eyes shot up to see a very angry super solder making his way over to the mat, eyes darkening as they landed to your injured form on the ground.
"What the fuck did you do?!"
"Bucky, we were just-
"Don't" Bucky growled through gritted teeth, rushing over to your side, and slipping his arm around your waist.
"Angel, are you okay?" He cupped your cheek, helping you to your feet and taking your hand in his, examining it with the utmost care. "Are you hurt anywhere?"
"M'all right" You nodded, your face heating up under his gaze, still a little shaken, your body trembling.
"How the fuck could you hurt her" Bucky spat, his metal hand clenched to his side, itching to punch Sharon in the jaw, having seen what she had just done but he didn't want to deal with the mess that would come afterwards. "The hell did you do that for"
"Excuse me? I was just showing her how to-"
Bucky's jaw clenched, instantly shutting her up. He refused to let go of you, keeping you firmly tucked into his side, growing unbelievably protective over you.
"Fine, go ahead, I'm sure she's different from all your other little side pieces" Sharon scoffed, smirking at the way your face fell. Bucky felt like he'd been hit in the chest; you were far more than any of his hook ups and he'd never considered treating you that way.
"You. Don't. Touch. Her" He glared her at before walking off with you. After the incident, Bucky insisted you go to the doctors to get checked over, waiting outside of the room like a kicked puppy. He couldn't help but feel guilty that all this had happened because of him. He also wondered that you thought.
Did you think he'd just use you for one night?
He would never.
He knew he wasn't into dating. He gave up on the dream of getting married, having kids, all that years ago. But that was before he met you. Ever since you'd thrown him a shy smile along with the softest hello Sergeant Barnes, Bucky had been a goner.
If his feelings were was bad before, it was even worse now.
You were told to ice your arm for the pain and swelling. Bucky had swept you away right to the kitchen, despite you telling him you'd be fine, plopping you onto the kitchen island wrapping an ice pack in a towel. He held it to your arm, frowning at the way you refused to look at him, your face downcast to the floor.
"Doll?" Bucky wrapped his arms around you for a comforting hug, wondering if the altercating with Sharon was still upsetting you, "Are you okay sweets? I missed you, haven't seen you in ages"
"I-I'm fine, I'm sorry" You pulled away from his arms, remembering Sharon's words from earlier, instantly missing the warmth of his body. "I know you don't feel the same way Bucky" You bit your lip to keep it from trembling.
Bucky blinked in confusion, having no idea what you were talking about. What did he not feel the same way over.
"What do you mean y/n"
"I mean I like you-but I know you don't like me that way so I kept myself busy so I wouldn't bother you because Sharon said-
"Wait, slow down, what did Sharon say"
You sighed before recounting all the things that had lead to this moment, Sharon insulting you, then telling you to back off, to straight up fighting you.
"Oh doll" Bucky shook his head, feeling worse over what had happened but over the moon over your confessed feelings, "She's right you know," He teased at the pout that made it's way to your lips before playfully pecking them, catching you by surprise.
"I don't do relationships. Certainly never had before. That was before I met the sweetest thing in the world and she's had my heart since" Bucky whispered, his hands, one warm, one cool cupping your cheeks, "She has me dreamin' of sayin' I do and that white picket fence, a ring on her finger, a pretty little baby bump with flowers on the window sill. Maybe a baby boy n' a baby girl. Maybe even a cat. She's the cutest little lab assistance and I'd love for her to be my girl, sweets"
Bucky held your face in his hands, his thumbs caressing over your warm cheeks while you grew bashfully shy, burying your face into his chest instead, making him chuckle.
"I didn't think you were the relationship type" You shrugged, toying with his dog tags, "I'm not you're darlin' Bucky"
"That's cause you're my doll" Bucky tilted your face up making you look up at him, his lips pressing the softest kiss to your nose and then your lips. "My one and only doll"
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strang3lov3 · 11 days
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Chevelle
Summary- (joel miller x virgin!reader) Joel figures out that you’re the one who hit his baby, his precious 1964 Chevrolet Chevelle. He needs you to make it right, but he doesn’t want your money ❤️‍🔥🍆 (5k words)
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Tags- MDNI hot girls can’t drive, implied age gap, virgin!reader, we're calling him tender dark!joel, soft!dom joel, tender dubcon (power imbalance, joel solicits sex from reader, no explicit consent but reader is into it) reader has a luscious bush, Joel walks you through handjobs, blowjobs, fingering, oral, unprotected piv, creampie, come eating, loss of virginity. Joel is clothed and reader is not.
A/N- Writing this is how I spent my spring break. Hope you love it 🩵 Thank you @noxturnalpascal for all of your help editing and your encouragement.
Based on mine and @beefrobeefcal shared prompt where we asked, "What would happen if reader damaged Joel’s vehicle?” Her fic is here and it’s one of my favorite things I’ve read!! Kiki has such a beautiful voice in her writing and I love all the details she adds to her fics.
Pawn shop by @toxicanonymity came to mind when I wrote this story and was a source of inspiration. Also worth a read, I have nothing but love for Tox’s writing 🩷
It’s late when you get off your shift at Tony’s, the shitty Italian restaurant you’ve been working at for far too long. It doesn’t pay much and you’ve considered working a new job to save up and move out of your brother’s house, but you’ve been putting that idea off for a variety of reasons. One of them being Joel. 
Joel’s your neighbor, a sexy, older man you’ve got a certain fondness for. His hair used to be more brown but it’s grayer now, same with the scruff on his face. He’s got sparkling, chocolatey eyes and a sharp nose set above a thick, downturned mustache. He always looks a little dirty when you see him, with dirt caked into his forehead wrinkles and grease smeared along his temple or his jaw. He’s always either fresh off a contracting job or working on his car. He’s got this cute little Chevy he spends his nights and weekends with, a 1964 Chevrolet Chevelle, baby blue.
Joel was one of the first people to welcome you to the neighborhood and even helped you move your stuff into your brother’s house, though helping you implies he let you do any work. Joel offered you a pop from his fridge and then took over entirely, putting both himself and your brother to work moving all of your stuff in. You didn’t lift a finger that day. 
-
You can’t seem to pull your eyes from the little green glowing letters on your dash, watching letters and numbers on the screen roll on by. 12:37 A.M. 101.9. Paper Bag - Fiona Apple.  You’re so out of it. You yawn and blink a couple of times, focusing back on the narrow roads of your neighborhood. It’s so poorly lit over here, and it doesn’t help that one of your headlights is out. Joel’s been bugging you to let him fix that, he says it’ll only take five minutes.
You turn onto your street and bam. You’re wide awake now. You just hit something. 
You hit Joel’s car. Joel’s fucking car. What the fuck is it doing on the street? He always has it safely kept in his garage. Oh dear god, the panic is setting in. This is Joel’s baby. You just hit his baby, his pride and joy. 
You can’t even bring yourself to assess the damage you’ve inflicted upon his dear Chevy. Probably dented to shit, but you don’t really wanna know. Instead, you just pull your foot off the brake, press your remote control garage door opener, then pull into your garage as you press your lips together tightly. You’re surprised and relieved to find that there’s hardly a scratch on your own car. Joel won’t know. He won’t.
The next morning, you’re sipping on your coffee as you check your mailbox. Joel’s outside his house, loading up his work truck with some tools and supplies. He waves to you and you wave back, a small stack of mail in your hand. 
“Whose mail you got today, sweetheart?” he calls to you. 
You check the names on some of the letters. “Davidsons’ and Pierces’,” you answer through a chuckle. Joel rolls his eyes and laughs. The incompetent mailman is a running joke amongst yourself, Joel, and your other neighbors. He never seems to deliver anything to the right address, so you and your neighbors are often hand delivering each other your misplaced mail.
You laugh with Joel until you notice his smile disappear. He’s narrowing his eyes on his Chevy. Your heart drops as he steps closer to the vehicle, then pinches his nose in frustration. Fuck. Joel stomps back to his work truck, haphazardly tosses something in the bed and then slams the tailgate. Yeah, he’s fucking pissed. Your neck and your face heat in shame as you quickly run back inside.
-
In the two weeks since Joel’s car was hit, he’s been working to repair it tirelessly. He’s ordered a new tail light, since whoever hit his car shattered it and he’s spent a pretty penny ordering the exact shade of baby blue paint to touch up all of the scratches. Joel only trusts himself to touch his car, but the situation necessitates that he’ll have to take it in to a local repair shop to get the dents out. Fucking fantastic. 
When Joel gets off work tonight, he notices he’s got some packages on his doorstep, hoping it’s the shit he ordered for his car. He’ll open them shortly, but he first notices that one of the packages is addressed to you. Go figure, he thinks, chuckling to himself. He walks the package over to your house, noticing your car is parked outside of the driveway. And it’s backed in too, which is odd. Joel assumes your car must’ve been blocking your brother’s, so he probably played musical chairs with your cars to get his out and then backed yours up onto the driveway. You never back your own car in the driveway, and Joel’s pretty sure it’s because you don’t know how. You probably can’t parallel park, either. He’ll have to show you how to do that sometime.
What’s also new is a bit of baby blue paint on your red Honda Civic’s exterior, right by your headlight, the same headlight he’s been nagging you to let him fix. Joel bites the inside of his cheek. Interesting. He knocks on your door, package in hand, but he’s met with no answer. No biggie. He leaves the package on your porch and goes back to your car, inspecting the paint once more. He scoffs in astonishment and walks home. Unbelievable. 
-
The next evening, you check your mailbox after forgetting to do so earlier. As always, you never have just your own mail. This time you’ve got Joel’s. You walk it over to Joel’s house with the intention of dropping it off on his porch and going back home, not wanting to bother him as he works on his Chevy but his whistle startles you. “Hey you,” he says. “C’mere.”
“O-oh,” you stutter. “I’m just dropping off your–”
“Yeah, I know. Just c’mere a minute,” Joel says. “Got a fuckin’ bone t’pick with you.”
Your palms are beginning to sweat. He doesn’t know anything. Maybe he just wants some company while he works on his car, it wouldn’t be the first time. But still, there’s something about his tone. You step off of his porch and cut through his lawn to get to his garage. Once inside, you help yourself to a root beer from his refrigerator. Something cold and fizzy and sweet to help you calm your nerves.“Oh, sure, help yourself,” Joel mumbles. He notices your fingers slipping off the tab of the pop can and pulls it from your hands, then opens it for you. He’s wearing a stained Prince and the Revolution t-shirt and a slightly too tight pair of jeans that squeeze his ass just so. His garage is decorated with old license plates, posters, other odds and ends. 
“Thank you,” you whisper. 
Joel says nothing as he walks to his work bench. He pulls a lightbulb out of a cardboard box and waves it in your direction, he’s only a couple of feet from you. “Ordered the wrong bulb,” he tells you. 
You can only nod. You think about maybe making a joke about the mailman screwing it up somehow, but you bite your tongue. You don’t trust yourself not to stutter right now.
“M’sure you saw, my baby here’s all banged up,” Joel puts the bulb back in the box and leans against his work bench, facing you. “Happened a couple weeks ago.”
“Mm,” you hum.
“Hit and run, can you believe that?” 
“No, I can’t. That-that’s terrible.”
“I know it is. And here I thought we had a nice neighborhood…” he trails off before speaking again, “You think you know someone, huh.” 
Someone. So he has someone in mind? “Yeah, it’s terrible…what happened to your car. Can’t believe someone would uh…would do that, knowing how you, your car…yeah. Terrible.”
Joel stares at you for a minute before speaking again, taking note of how you can’t seem to hold eye contact with him. He steps closer to you.
“You wouldn’t know a thing about it, right?”
“Yes,” you answer, quickly realizing your word mishap when Joel raises his eyebrows. “No, yeah. I don’t know–yeah, nothing,” you sip your root beer before fidgeting with the pop tab and shifting your weight from one foot to the other. 
Joel notices. “Squirmin’ an awful lot over there, sweetheart. You got something you wanna tell me?” You shake your head, still playing with the tab on the pop can. Joel removes it from your hand, his fingers gracing over yours before placing it on the workbench. He’s moving closer to you now, matching your pace as you walk backward until the back of your legs hit his car. You gasp, he stands so tall and imposing in front of you. “Easy,” he warns. “You be careful with her.”
“Yeah, I know. Always,” you reply. Your voice is beginning to shake. 
Joel hums at your response. “Not always, though, sweetheart. Think you were pretty careless with my baby a couple weeks ago.” 
The familiar pressure behind your eyes is beginning to build as tears are pricking your waterline, “I don’t know what–”
“Awh, don’t do that. Don’t lie t’me.” 
 The tears spill over. You’re caught. You don’t know how Joel figured out what you did, but he did. “You’ve got a guilty conscience, dontcha?”
You nod before you can speak. “I’m so sorry,” you cry. Sobs begin to wrack your body, your tears now flowing freely. You’re so guilty. You should’ve told Joel what happened that night. It was an accident, and he might’ve been mad, but you’ve probably made it worse for yourself with your dishonesty. “I’m so sorry, Joel, it was late and I was so tired–”
Joel pulls you in a tight embrace, stroking your back with his fingertips. “Shhh, I know. I know,” he whispers in your ear,  “S’okay, sweet girl.” 
“It was so…” you try to explain, choking on your sobs and your sniffles. “So late and d-dark and I wasn’t paying attention.”
“I know. Quit your cryin’, s’gonna be fine,” Joel whispers. He pulls away from you, looking at you with those deep brown eyes of his as he wipes the tears from your face with his thumbs. Know you’ll make it up to me.”
“I will,” you agree quickly. “I’ll pick up some more shifts, Joel, and I’ll save and–”
“Oh, no. Not that. Save your money,” he tells you earnestly. “Somethin’ else,” Your eyes follow Joel when he leaves you for a moment to flip a switch on the wall of his garage. Something in the air changes then, a thick, heavy feeling between you both when he makes his way back to you. “Use your head, sweetheart. How are we gonna make it right?”
Your mouth is dry, your tongue swollen as you pick up what Joel’s putting down. “Let me give ya a hint,” Joel grunts, sucking in his gut slightly as he unbuttons his jeans. He wears no underwear, a thatch of coarse hair littering his skin is what you see when he pulls down his zipper. He grips your wrist and shoves your hand beneath the denim where you feel his package, already half hard. It’s warmer, thicker than you would expect. He feels heavy in your palm, his pubic hair wiry and scratchy against your knuckles. 
He doesn’t tilt his head in confusion at your hesitancy. “Don’t know what to do with all this, do ya?”
You shake your head no. “I’ve never…with anyone, before.”
“S’alright. I’ll walk ya through it all,” Joel says, seemingly unsurprised at the revelation. With your hand still on his cock, Joel pulls himself out of his jeans entirely. He’s harder now. “Like this,” he instructs, bringing your hand to his mouth and spitting in it. A pang of arousal fills your gut at the action. He pushes your hand lower and guides you to wrap your hand around his cock. It feels heavy, warm to the touch, sticky with his sweat and his saliva. Rock hard, but smooth like satin. You admire him, his blushed tip, the prominent veins on his shaft. 
Your breath hitches as Joel takes control, using his strong, weathered hand to guide your own to massage his cock. “You got it,” he encourages, sensing your rigidity. “Tighter,” he instructs, squeezing his hand around yours. You’re slow to gain confidence but he’s patient, doing the work himself for now. “You move your hand all the way up, all the way down my cock,” he tells you. 
You nod in understanding. Joel drops his hand but yours stays stroking his member. He sighs and tilts his head backward as you focus on the task at hand. Without the pressure of intense eye contact, you take the opportunity to admire him, the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, the small drops of sweat rolling down his throat. You’re shy when he smiles at you, quickly averting your attention from him and to his cock, watching the way it twitches beneath your hand, where a little bead of precum forms. Experimentally, you swipe your thumb over the tip. “That’s it,” he whispers, stroking your cheek with the back of his hand. He ruts his hips into your hips, “Doin’ just fine.”
You stroke his cock like this for a while, gaining confidence in yourself until he stops you suddenly.
 “Is that it?” 
“Is that it,” Joel mocks with a feigned pout. “No, hon. You banged up my baby pretty good. We ain’t quite square yet.”
His leaking cock bounces against his tummy as he approaches his work bench. Your heart pounds as you can’t quite see what he’s reaching for. “Know it’s new to ya,” he says.  “Just listen to me, s’all you gotta do.”
Joel returns to you with a dirty rag in his hand and lays it on the concrete ground, then reaches for your face. He pulls your bottom lip down and lets it go to watch it bounce back up. “Knees,” he whispers, gently pushing you by your shoulders to the ground. The rag he laid on the concrete for your knees is a sweet touch, all things considered. His cock is inches away from your face as he holds it between his thumb, middle, and forefingers. He presses himself to your lips, encouraging you to open your mouth. “Give it a taste,” he instructs you. “An’ you can kiss it too, if you’re feelin’ amorous.” 
You part your lips and tentatively lick the weeping slit of his thick head just once. After a moment, taking in the saltiness of his precome, you lick him a couple more times, gaining confidence quicker than you did using just your spit soaked hand on him. Bigger stripes now, using more pressure. Like Joel advised, you kiss his cock a couple times, each kiss sloppier than the last before swirling your tongue around the tip. You’re learning it all, the softness of his skin, his musky, heady taste. 
“Give me your hand,” Joel says. “Goes right here,” He wraps your hand around the base of his cock, same as before. He places one of his hands on your head, guiding you closer to him, encouraging you to take him deeper now. You do as such, sputtering and choking when you get overzealous and take him too quickly.
Joel chuckles, “Not all at once, sweetheart. Go slow. Try it again.” This time, Joel controls the pace at which you take him. He pushes himself into your mouth and senses when it becomes too much, pauses for you. He pulls his hips back, then rocks back into your mouth, building a slow, shallow pace for you to get used to. 
He’s pushing his cock deeper into your mouth. His tip teases the back of your throat as he whispers, “Little more. Be brave,” You gaze up at him, searching his eyes for some sort of approval. He nods with his brows furrowed. “Do it for me, hon.”
You allow him to fuck himself deeper in your mouth now, your eyes pricking with tears as you gag and sputter on his cock. This time, Joel doesn’t stop himself. He’s grunting, groaning, savoring the warmth of your wet, soft mouth. “So good,” he tells you before tapping your hand, reminding you to put it to use.
What you can’t reach with your mouth, you massage with your hand as you cup his balls with your other. You and Joel work in tandem, him drawing in and out of your mouth as you bob your head and flick your tongue against his shaft. Your jaw is sore with the newness of it all, and just as you’re becoming used to the thickness of his cock between your lips and on your tongue, he pauses. “M’gonna stop you now,” Joel mumbles as he pulls out of your mouth, his eyes focused on your swollen lips and how the string of saliva connected from them to his cock breaks. “S’your turn.”
“My turn?”
“Mhm. It’s etiquette, hon,” Joel says with a grunt, lifting you to your feet. He reaches between your bodies and unbuttons your pants, pushing both them and your underwear down your legs. “Always return the favor.” Joel lifts you slightly, sitting your bare ass on the hood of his car, then pulls your pants off your legs the rest of the way. “Arms up,” he tells you. He lifts your shirt off of your body, unhooks your bra and lets it fall to your lap. You’ve never been so vulnerable, so exposed in front of someone before.  Instinctively, you cover your chest with your arms and cross your legs. 
“You’re shy,” he whispers. Joel drapes your clothing over his shoulder before reaching for your arms, removing them from your chest and placing them on either side of your body. “Stay like this,” He holds your knees next, uncrossing your legs and spreading them wide for his view. 
Joel takes in your body and admires your wet cunt, how your thick curls frame it beautifully. A shiver goes down your spine as his eyes scan the rest of your body before he holds intense eye contact with you as he folds your clothes, placing them in a neat pile next to you on his car. You watch his chest rise and fall with steady breaths as he drops to his knees, situating himself between your thighs.
He presses a sloppy kiss against your inner knee, then another on your other leg. He kisses his way up your inner thigh, nipping at your flesh and soothing the marks with his tongue. He holds your legs firmly apart, knowing your instinct is to shut them when he reaches your cunt, his hot breath fanning over your center. “Wider,” he whispers, “I gotcha.”
The once cool metal of Joel’s car is now hot and slick under your sweaty, trembling palms. Your pulse beats as you look up at the garage ceiling, lacking the courage to look at Joel between your thighs. “Relax for me,” he tells you. You try. 
You gasp when he finally begins exploring you, first his thumb parting open your folds. Adding a couple more digits, he hums in satisfaction as he finds you’re already wet, your slick glistening on his fingers. He dips one of those fingers inside of you slowly, watching how you react to his touch. You twitch and fight to keep yourself still and silent as he adds a second finger, curling it rhythmically and stroking that sweet spot inside you. 
“Oh, god,” you moan as he dives into your cunt, the soft and warm, private place between your thighs, his mouth now joining where his fingers touch. His tongue is hot and wet as he drags it through your sex, circling your clit with it. “Joel, please.”
Joel’s satisfied as he hears sounds of pleasure fall from your lips, feeling your hips bucking and grinding gently against his mouth. He sucks one fold, nips at the other as he curls his fingers inside you rhythmically. With the hand that’s not teasing your pussy, he digs his fingers into the soft flesh of your thigh. “Quit squirmin’ on my car,” he warns with a firm squeeze to your thigh, hard enough to bruise you. “Ya tryin’ to scratch her again?”
His wiry stubble drags across your skin, scratching gently against the inside of your thighs. You can feel it building up quickly, that hot, sparkling feeling deep in your core as he works you, sucks your clit between his lips. 
“Please,” you cry, the only word you can form at the moment. 
“I know, hon,” he murmurs, escalating his efforts on your pussy. Sucking, licking, curling his fingers harder. He works you through your orgasm, feeling you gush against his mouth, your arousal dripping down his fingers and pooling into the palm of his hand. Your hands fly to his scalp, twitching and jerking from the sensitivity with your fingers tugging on his curls when he licks a stripe up the seam of your cunt. 
Joel pulls away from your center with a satisfied grin, lips shiny, his facial hair damp. He rises, standing above you, and sloppily kisses your lips. You’ve never tasted your own arousal before. His strong hands find your ass cheeks, pulling you closer to where he wants you.
From there, you gasp when he slides his cock through your slick folds, rubbing thick head against your sensitive clit and watches how you react to his touch. “What do you think I’m doin’ to ya next?”
“Joel,” you whimper, your hips chasing his movements, following where his cock teases your cunt. 
“Yeah, you know what I’m doin,” he purrs. “Crossin’ it all off your list tonight.”
You tense when he notches just the head of his cock in your pussy, reaching for his arm, his shoulder, any part of him you can hold. 
“Know you’re nervous,” he says softly, rubbing circles into your thighs. “But s’just me an’ you here. Wider, hon. Spread your legs for me.”
You nod quickly, following suit and spreading your legs to accommodate him. “Like this?”
“Yeah, like that. S’perfect, hon, that’s all I need from you. C’mere,” Joel adjusts his hold on you before inching his cock into you a bit more. You’re so tight, squeezing him hard and whining through the stretch as he pushes into you further, the gradual slide inside your body causing him to grunt quietly. “Relax for me,” he groans through a strained breath, parting your insides as he’s sheathed himself inside you fully now. “Bite me f’ya need to, sweetheart. It’ll be okay. You’ll get used to it.”
It aches, but the pain dulls as Joel lets you get used to the feeling, the newness of his cock inside you. He holds you close and you take advantage of his suggestion, biting softly into the flesh of his neck, tasting the saltiness of his skin as you whimper quietly. Joel groans, his eyebrows furrowing together. “Shh,” he hushes, “You’re okay, hon. You’re doin’ alright.”
Joel slowly pulls out of you and fills you up again. “That’s it, sweetheart,” he praises as you tilt your hips, opening yourself to accept more of him. You’re humming into his neck as his cock recedes and then pushes in once more. “Eyes on me now. There it is, easy. Easy.”
You do as instructed, pulling your face away from him to meet his gaze. His sparkling brown eyes stay on yours as he pulls out of you, pushing into you slowly, deliberately. You hold onto his neck, his broad shoulders, clutching the fabric of his sweat dampened shirt as he builds a steady pace now. He holds you close to his body, one of his hands traveling up your body and groping your bouncing breasts, teasing your sensitive nipples.
“You just follow my lead,” Joel says, fucking you faster now. His fingers are pressed firmly into your waist now as he rolls his hips against yours. The pain is gone now, dissipated with his continued languid thrusts into you. You feel so full, so satisfied with his thick cock inside you, massaging your insides.
He fucks you steadily but gently, maintaining a quick rhythm. You didn’t know sex could make you feel this way, so much pleasure.  You’re moaning freely, overwhelmed with emotion, tears flowing freely down your cheeks. God, you love it, and it’s nothing but pure pleasure. 
Joel’s not oblivious to your enjoyment. He’s watching you, your face contorting, he’s listening to your moans and your cries, feeling you shiver and twitch beneath his touch and how it’s all because of him, all of your pleasure at the hands of Joel and only ever Joel. He feels a sort of carnal sense of power over this, the effect his touch has on you. You’re soft, so soft and all for him, your flesh for his hands and his teeth alone to squeeze, dig into, to bite on. 
You reach for his arm and guide his hand to your center, pressing his fingers against your clit as that familiar tightness in your gut begins to build once more. “Please,” you beg. 
“Thought this was supposed to be a deal for me. Didn’t need to hit my car f’ya needed me like this,” he taunts, laughing breathlessly. But Joel obliges, of course he obliges you. He moves his calloused fingertips in circles over your clit, coaxing out your release. “Takin’ me so good, sweetheart. Look at you, m’gonna make you come again. Makin’ out like a fuckin’ bandit, aren’t you?”
Indeed you are. It’s not long before you’re coming for him. With his ministrations on your clit, his thrusts now faster, harder, deeper, you’re coming undone for him as his name pours from your lips, long and slow like honey. With your lips parted open, you’re twitching and shuddering against him as you watch his face, letting yourself go. You whimper and moan, and your release is volcanic in the way it washes over your body so fiercely. Heavy, vivid waves of pleasure washing over you the way lava rolls down the earth. Slow, fiery, intense.
Your pulsing cunt milks Joel’s own climax, his orgasm crashing through him in such a way that he loses focus on you. His eyes screwed shut, the noises he’s making louder than he intended–what starts as a grunt turns into a moan, long and libertine as he fucks you harder than he probably should as you whimper in overstimulation. His thrusts turn harder and frenzied as he milks himself with your cunt, spurting hot ropes of his come inside you. You take everything he gives you, feeling so warm and full of his spend. 
His movements then begin to ease, slowing down some more until he eventually stills inside of you. He takes the quiet moment to check on you, holding your face in his hands as he makes sure you’re okay. Your chest heaves as he wipes your tears, but you silently nod, reassuring him that you’re alright.
With a soft grunt, he pulls out of you. He watches how your combined arousal spills on the baby blue paint of his Chevelle, then uses his thumb to push a bit of his escaped come back inside you. Such a lewd action from the man. 
Joel helps you to your feet, steadying you as you stand on shaky legs. He reaches for your clothes from the hood of his car, helping you dress yourself. “Didn’t want ‘em to get dirty,” he explains. “Everything’s covered in fuckin’ dirt and grease in here.”
“Thank you,” you smile shyly. Joel opens the garage door, the once peachy and blue sky now inky black. You didn’t realize how much time had passed. You take off back to your house, but Joel grips your bicep before you can step any further. 
 “Nuh uh,” he tuts. “Ya already hit my car, hon, you don’t wanna leave your mess on the hood now too, do ya?” Joel gestures to your combined arousal on the hood of his Chevelle, swipes his pointer finger through the mess and pushes it between your lips. Your brows furrow at the taste, that salty, heady flavor you’ve never tasted before now. “Use your tongue, sweetheart.”
“You want me…”
“Lick it up,” he instructs in a quiet voice. Joel figured he might’ve let you off too easy, seeing as how you came twice–once on his tongue and once on his cock when this was all supposed to be for him. He bends you over the hood of his car, groping your ass as he leans over your shoulder to inspect your work, making sure it’s a job well done. “Good girl,” he praises, watching you lick his car clean. When you’re done, he kisses you softly.
He walks you home, dropping you off on your doorstep. You’re not quite sure what to say, whether you should apologize again, thank him, say goodnight. Joel fills the silence for you. “Gonna teach you how to drive right one of these days. Keep you out of another mess like this one, hm?” he smirks as he kisses your cheek. “Goodnight, hon.”
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cosmos-coma · 2 months
Text
My Sun, My Star
A/N: I'm so weak for Winter soldier Bucky. I cant wait to write more of him, I love this sad guilt ridden man.
Pairing: Winter Soldier!Bucky x Reader
Words: 6756
Warnings: Breaking and entering, Minor violence, Injury and Blood, Winter soldier Bucky, GN reader but also Pregnant reader, mild language, I'm not sure if this is fluff or angst or both??
Summary: You wait up late for your boyfriend Bucky to return from his mission, but it isn't Bucky who finds you.
Part 2 | Part 3 | Epilogue | Bucky Masterlist
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Your eyes blinked slowly, heavier with each passing second, yet you still managed to open them once again. Glancing at the bright white numbers of the digital clock you watched it change to 1:46 AM, causing a groan to pull from your lips. Bucky was supposed to be back tonight (yesterday technically) from his latest mission, but he still had yet to show up at your shared flat. 
You checked your phone again, the lack of notifications mocking your tired eyes. You let out one more sigh before you turned off the mindless babbling of the TV and stood up to get ready for bed. You were sure Bucky wouldn’t want you waiting up so late in your current condition anyway, he had been harping you about getting enough sleep and water and everything in between.
“I’m only four months pregnant, Bucky. I’m fully capable of staying up late” You had said to him. 
“Five months, Doll, and it’s about your cortisol levels. It’s not good for you or the baby, and it could lead to them being underweight” he said, reciting exactly what the doctor had told him during your last checkup. 
“Four and a half,” you argued as you stuck your tongue out at him, “and she was talking about getting chased by a bear kind of stress, not staying up to watch Bake Off.” 
You snorted at the memory of just earlier that week, a small smile coming to your face as you went through your nightly routine. You continued to check your phone here and there as you went, “Did you get back safe? How’d your mission go?” you had texted two hours ago, yet it still remained unread and unanswered.  
‘Maybe one more quick text wouldn’t hurt,’  you thought to yourself as you typed out the simple message and hit send. 
“Stay safe, okay? I love you.”
You sighed as you set the phone down, “it’s okay, everything is okay,” you assured yourself as you pulled one of his large hoodies over your head, enjoying the way the hem brushed against your bare thighs and the sleeves threatened to swallow your hands. “He’s a former assassin and a super soldier! Nothing is going to happen that he can’t handle,” You stated firmly to your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes remained unsure despite your voice’s conviction, but you did your best to ignore it, focusing instead on the achingly tired look they held. 
“Yes, I know. It’s finally time for bed, little one,” you mumbled sleepily as you felt your baby kick against the walls of your protruding belly, being quick to climb between the layers of blankets and lonesome sheets. “Fuck, that's cold…!” you swore quietly as your bare legs hit the icy fabric- having gone unwarmed by your personal space heater and super soldier.
Thankfully sleep came easily, the thought of waking up to Bucky’s sleepy, scruffy face only further urged your body to wind down so the moment would come sooner. 
----
Bucky’s phone buzzed again in his bag, lighting up with your smiling face as your text displayed on the screen, but nobody reached down to check it, as everyone found themselves in a far more urgent situation. 
“Keep him busy, Rodgers! I just need one more minute!” Tony yelled as he dug through the equipment in the quinjet, “For fuck’s sake, who organized this last?” 
“What do you think I’m doing…!” The blond grunted with a justified hint of frustration,” Sam? Any help??” He shouted with a pointed look, telling more than asking as he struggled to restrain his thrashing friend. A swift metal fist flew toward his already battered face, barely giving him time to duck out of the way and attempt to restrain it again. 
“Honestly? Seems like you’ve got this one,” Sam said, holding up his hands.
“SAM.” 
“I’m coming..! God, can’t either of you old men take a joke?”
No one knew exactly what happened, Bucky had gone off on his own in the Hydra base they were exploring. It was supposed to have been recently abandoned, something about the agents leaving in an urgent rush that left files upon files sitting out in the open. It was supposed to be a simple mission; everyone goes off in teams, gathers what they can, and makes sure there are no surprises. But Bucky assured them that he would be fine to go on his own, he hadn’t had a sign of relapse in over a year, and he would only be picking up what looked important. A simple job.
He should’ve listened. 
It was when he didn’t return to the jet with the rest of them that they started to get worried. 
“So, where’s the Manchurian candidate?” Tony jested, looking at his watch. They were supposed to leave maybe 10 minutes ago, not terribly late by any means, but enough to start getting worried about Bucky’s quietness over the coms.  
“Man, come on.. ” Sam sighed at Tony’s joke as he crossed his arms. 
“Bucky?” Steve tried calling over the coms, ignoring both of his teammates, but the line remained all too quiet. 
They found him finally in the basement level of the office building, old discarded computers lining the walls along with cabinets upon cabinets of old files and other equipment. He hadn’t even realized it was a trap until he stepped right into it, triggering a switch that had the computers and hidden speakers flashing images and sounds that assaulted his senses with fragmented memories long forgotten. 
He should have listened. 
Sam had found him first, on his knees in the middle of the floor with hands desperately covering his ears, trying to block out the incessant noise. Hauling his teammate to his feet, he rushed back to the jet, calling everyone off from their search before anything else could be sprung. 
At first, they thought he might be fine- quiet, but fine. He had given them a small smile and a wave of his hand as everyone tried to check in with him, taking a seat as the jet took off to go home. It had all seemed relatively normal until they were halfway back and the unseen battle inside him must have taken a turn. 
“Got it!” Tony yelled as he pulled out the dart gun, aiming quickly as he fired two shots into Bucky’s chest, readying a third as he waited and watched for the tranquilizers to finally take effect. It was slow as Bucky continued to struggle against the drug’s drain, his body and mind turning into slow-moving molasses. Low grunts emanated from his throat as the last of his strength ebbed away, leaving nothing but forced sleep in its wake. 
“Was two really necessary?” Steve asked as his shoulders finally relaxed, the strain and worry now temporarily over. 
Together they dragged the drugged-up assassin into the jet’s small quarantine area for the remainder of the trip, satisfied only when they heard the mechanical locks slide into place. It wasn’t much, and they knew that and if he really wanted to there would be no stopping him from getting out, but it was something- enough to give them a few seconds of preparation if nothing else.  
“I’m not giving a super soldier only a single dose, you two metabolize things like this way too fast and I’m not taking any chances with the Tin man over there.”
Bucky- no, the Winter Soldier, seemed to still be out of it when they finally landed, sat up and leaning against the wall, head slumped forward just as they had left him. 
“Alright, let's just get him into one of the holding rooms for the night. We’ll work on resetting him-” Tony lifted his hands as the two men glared in his direction, “- on ‘fixing him up’ as soon as he’s been secured.” 
Sam shook his head as Tony corrected himself, taking notice of the lit-up phone in Bucky’s bag, buzzing with an only recently delivered message. Sam had quickly become one of your closest friends after you were introduced to the team. He was one of the few people Bucky trusted with his life and between his sarcastic jokes, his incredibly loyal nature, and his willingness to give Bucky shit whenever he deserved it, you knew very quickly how great a friend he would be. 
But now his stomach twisted as he saw your name flash across the screen, the alert quickly minimizing itself as it joined the other messages you had sent that night. How was he gonna break this to you? The last thing you needed was a bunch of unnecessary stress on your shoulders, but it’s obvious you were beginning to worry over their late return. Sliding the phone back into its rightful place Sam told himself that he’d call you once they had things more figured out.
“Heart rate still seems to be resting. With any luck, he’ll remain knocked out until we get inside,” Tony relayed as he monitored the Soldier’s vitals and pressed the button to open the heavy quarantine doors.
The doors slid into their resting positions with a soft click. 
As soon as that click landed on sensitive ears, vibrant blue eyes shot open. Sparing not even a second, the Winter Soldier surged forward from his seat, not nearly as far gone as he left them to believe. With the element of surprise, the Soldier easily knocked past his teammates, throwing his body weight against them and knocking Sam and Steve off balance, leaving him a good headstart as he dashed out the jet’s open door.
“Fuck, Bucky- Wait!,” Steve swore as he stumbled out behind him, having to use his super soldier speed just to keep pace. But between the settled darkness of the night, and the winding alleyways the brunette stuck to, Steve was left falling behind in no time. “Shit,” Steve swore as he slowed to a stop, looking around for any sign of his compromised friend. 
However, the streets lay barren, the fluttering of moths in the streetlights the only sign of life on the entire block.
---
The heavy thud of his boots echoed against the alleyway’s pavement. He wasn't sure where exactly he was headed as his silhouette slunk between the warm light of the streetlamps, but part of him- a currently repressed part of him- knew that safety was bound to be just ahead. 
His heart beat smoothly as he kept his pace, every other step falling in time as he rounded the corner. Blindly, he let himself be led by instinct and his feet maneuvered the city’s countless paths with a mind of their own. They slowed before a little apartment building and as those emotionless eyes looked up, he knew this was it.
The lateness of the hour had almost assured that no one was around as he slipped inside, footsteps padding up the stairs before stopping at the third floor. His heavy boots left nothing but wet prints in their wake as he wandered down the hall, impossibly silent, as even the notoriously creaky boards dared not announce his presence. 
The closer he got, the more the back of his mind itched, as if something- someone- was begging him not to go any further, but he refused to listen; he knew this was where he was meant to be and where he would find what his body was so inexplicably drawn to.
With each step his head turned on a swivel, looking for the sense of safety and familiarity that the other half of him seemed to find here- and desperately wished he wouldn’t discover. Just as his foot was about to take another step he stopped. ‘No. Here.’ His gut told him, turning to the door. 
His door.
Your door.
The former assassin bypassed the lock with ease, quickly slipping in before shutting the door behind him. A dim light illuminated the living room, the little lamp you left on for him casting its orange glow over his surroundings as he surveyed them.
A few mugs stand beside the sink, framed photos dot the wall and side tables, and a veritable nest of blankets lay across the couch. It was obvious someone had been here, and recently. A deep breath pulled into his lungs, causing his head to tilt to the side in contemplation as an unfamiliar scent hit his nose, something just as earthy as it was sweet and speckled with distant notes of… him?
“Hmmph”  
His sensitive ears picked up the soft grunt from down the hall immediately. His shoulders squared and tensed as his body leaned into a defensive position. Cautious fingers pulled the knife from his boot, ready for whatever may come at him as he approached. 
The sounds of soft breaths lead him to a door left ajar. Light just slipped past the curtains into the darkened room. Badum… Badum… Badum… a heartbeat pulsed in his ears as he took a step closer, leaving the door open and letting further light fall onto the source of the noise. 
His wolfish gaze ran down your form as you lay there on your back, swallowed in the extra fabric of the old sweatshirt. Your hand rested casually over your stomach as your other one squished gently against your cheek. Your legs lay bare to the world after having kicked the overbearing sheets away, leaving just a glance of your underwear for him to take in.  
“Mmph” You grunted again as you shifted, your face now turned to him as that earthy scent of yours gripped him like a vice and refused to let go.
Your sweet sleep became interrupted though- much to his dismay- as the phone on your nightstand began to light up and buzz incessantly. Still, as a statue he watched as you groaned, propping yourself up on your elbows as you went to check what your device could possibly want at this ungodly hour. 
With one loose fist, you rubbed the sleep from your eyes away, blinking consciousness back into them until you saw Bucky’s illuminated figure before you, standing tall and quiet as he watched you intently. 
“Bucky..?” You couldn’t hide the grin that spread across your face as you saw the familiar face of your lover lit up by the bright light of your phone screen. But the longer you looked the more you noticed.
His eyes were all wrong, his gaze was devoid, that’s the only way you could put it. Devoid of meaning and humanity, it seemed every gaze- every movement- was a means to an end. Empty… save for a flicker of fear; It was probably the only thing in those eyes right now that registered as human. The fear of someone who was lost, unknowing of their purpose, and confused as to why your gaze was made his cold heart falter.
His expression was flat and stoic, save for the knit of confusion that pulled his brows together. His stance was tense and prepared, the discrete knife still glittering in his hands as he took another step forward, his head slowly shaking in response to your question. 
A gasp caught in your throat as you finally understood. Glancing at your phone you saw it was Sam who was calling, undoubtedly trying to tell you what you now already knew.
“Soldat…” You whispered, trying to hide the way his name sent shivers across your skin. Your phone went black then, as you didn’t pick up in time and you were left blind by the sudden darkness.
 You and Bucky had talked about what to do if you found him like this, “You call Sam and Steve, Okay? You find a place to hide and you stay far away, no matter what you hear. There’s no reasoning with him,” He had told you.
So much for that
Your phone lit up again with Sam’s urgent call, its revealing light sending ice down your spine as you saw the man nearly standing over you now, just a hair’s breadth away.
Your hand rose slowly, shaking as you tested a reach for your phone, stopping dead in your tracks as he let out a disapproving grunt. Your head nodded slowly as you gulped, returning your hand to your stomach as you watched his gaze finally shift away. 
With unbothered calmness, he looked toward your phone to see Sam’s face and name scrawled across your screen. Wordlessly he reached over and pressed the ‘decline call’ button, cutting the call short and leaving you two in perfect silence once more. 
Panic began to rise in your throat as his gaze turned back toward you, darkened now only by the lack of light. With slow movements the Winter Soldier reached out, putting the knife away as he crouched down, as if trying to attract a skittish animal. 
Your whole body tensed as his reach came closer, eyes screwing shut as you waited for the worst, “Please… Just don’t hurt her…” You whispered, fear and desperation rattling your voice, just as it did your anxiety-filled body. 
But the pain never came. Instead, the cool touch of metal fingers ran down your cheek, barely denting your flesh as he relished in its softness. Your eyes peeked open cautiously, as his fingers moved along the slope of your jaw, tilting your head up as he came to your chin. 
His eyes had changed, you noticed, instead of being a harsh blizzard, they had now settled into something more human, something warmer and… yearning? 
“Soldat..?” You questioned as you watched his lips part, his senses focused only on the way your body reacted to his touch. You were sure he could hear the rapid pattering of your heart beneath your ribs, its pace only increasing as his fingers moved down your neck and to the exposed collarbone in your loose neckline.
“Красивый [Beautiful]...,” was all he could reply. It came out so soft you weren’t sure you heard it at first, it’s quiet reverence meant for your ears and your ears only. “Из-за тебя он чувствует себя здесь в безопасности...? Замки дерьмовые, видимость слишком высокая, но ты… [Are you why he feels safe here…? The locks are shit, the visibility is too high, but you…]” He continued, quiet and unbothered as if he assumed you couldn’t understand him. 
“He’s been bugging me to get better locks all week…” you replied with a huff, quickly shutting up as his stare found your eyes again. Between Bucky’s ramblings in the night and Natasha’s tendency to only gossip in Russian, you had made an effort to learn it; You were still learning, and your pronunciation was shit, but your understanding had gotten far better. 
“And you have a good ear…” He spoke in English this time, the vague hint of an amused smile pulling at the assassin’s stern lips. You couldn’t help but wonder if he’d ever done that before. If that odd little smile had been seen by anyone else- anyone still living that is.
A breath of relief left you as your lips stretched to mimic his, the tension easing out of your body a little by little.
His metallic touch continued to linger, running down your covered chest until it settled on the waistband of your underwear, the cool metal trailing across your ticklish skin. 
“Ah, wait, Sol-” You jumped at his touch, grabbing his wrist, despite knowing you wouldn’t have the strength to stop him if it’s what he wanted.
But instead of dipping his fingers lower, he simply tugged the oversized hoodie up, gathering it over your chest and exposing the firm baby bump concealed below. His head tilted to the side as he listened to the tiny heartbeat that fluttered in your belly as well as the thuds of its little movements against your skin. Slowly, still with that inkling of a smile, he turned to look at you, his hand hovering just above your vulnerable midsection as if awaiting permission. 
Heat rose to your cheeks as you hesitated. On one hand, you felt a surprising amount of calm under the assassin's touch, his need for your approval only increasing your sense of security. But on the other hand, Bucky would never be able to live with himself if something happened to you or the baby, accident or not. 
“Oh. I-” 
CRASH.
You nearly jumped out of your skin as were cut short by the loud noise. The door to your apartment slammed open, surely breaking the hinges with the sheer force of it. Over a dozen heavy boots stormed into your apartment as the lights turned on, flooding your senses and forcing the Soldier’s attention elsewhere. 
Your hand found his instantly, the heat of his calloused skin a comfort to you just the way Bucky’s was, especially as it squeezed around yours just the same. Sitting up properly now your sweatshirt swallowed your pregnant form once again and you peeked out to see just what was going on. 
Through The Winter Soldier’s defensive stance in front of you, his knife is now drawn once more, you watched a small armed group, covered in black tactical gear raid your home, all guns pointing towards you- or more accurately- the former assassin attempting to shield you. You recognized the symbols on their vests as the team’s secondary security force, having even met a few of them over the years. But where was the rest of the team? Where was Sam, and Steve, and Tony?
“Step away from the civilian!” “Put your hands in the air!” “Sir, drop the knife!” They all shouted, overlapping with each other as each of them rushed out their demands. 
“Don't shoot! It’s okay! It’s okay!” You rushed.
You tried to slip your hand from his, but he only held fast, “Soldat, please… It’s okay, just do what they say… They don’t want to hurt us. Please,” You urged, giving his hand a gentle squeeze, 
His defenses faltered as he listened to you beg him to stand down. It wasn’t the usual begging he heard in his line of work, and coming from your lips had his walls cracking in an unprecedented way. 
He shouldn’t have looked back at your eyes, wide and pleading, as they shook his walls further. Moving slowly he turned, kneeling before you despite the way the armed group yelled at him not to. You just held up your hand to them, pleading for them to be as gentle with him as he was with you. 
“Мое солнце [My Sun]...” The warm flesh of his hand came up easily to cradle your face and a small smile pulled at him again as you leaned into his large palm. “Я только что нашел тебя. Я не потеряю тебя снова так быстро[I’ve only just found you. I will not lose you again so quickly]. ”
Your heart both swelled and pained for your Soldier. You looked into his eyes and saw a sense of certainty, a sense of knowing, you hadn’t seen from him earlier. “Oh… my soldier, my star,” Your fingers entwined with the hand holding your cheek, ”You can not lose me in any way that would last…” You whispered to him past the shouts, the commotion, and the tension, like you were the only two in the room. 
“Sir, put the knife down!” A young squad member called again, his voice far more concerned than his superiors. You didn’t recognize him or his number and you figured he must’ve been new. His gun trembled in his hands as he shouted again, but as the Soldier failed to move and the kid’s finger unexpectedly twitched, there came a sudden- 
BANG.
“Ah-!” Your face twisted with pain as you pulled away, “Fuck…!” Your hands instinctively grabbed your leg, clamping over the shooting pain in your calf that hit you- well- like a bullet. 
You winced again as you pulled one of your hands back, the raw skin of your leg angrily letting you know that it did not like being brushed against. Warm, wet crimson covered your fingers as you looked down, becoming slightly dizzy at how much had already covered your palm. You were thankful it only seemed to be a graze, but the burn you already felt and knowing you were losing blood had your stomach lurching in uncomfortable ways. 
Concern painted the assassin’s expression as you recoiled away from his doting touch, but as the unmistakable warm, metallic smell curled into his nose, his expression darkened dramatically. What was once kind, curious blue eyes now saw nothing but red as he caught sight of the wound slashing across your skin. His jaw set firmly, almost audibly grinding his teeth as he stood and turned to the young kid. 
You looked back at the newcomer as you tried to breathe through the pain, the horrified look on his face telling you that he knew he was a dead man walking. His face went ghost white as the super soldier stalked toward him and through even worse trembling hands he raised his gun to shoot again. 
“No…!”
A sickening thud rang out as the bullet hit the assassin square in his good shoulder, getting lodged in the muscly flesh. His shoulder jerked back at the force, but it wouldn’t stop his stride as he closed the gap. Another shot rang out, but with the solid vibranium arm now covering the barrel it did little to help this poor dumb kid. Snatching him by the neck, you watched as your assassin held him up until his feet kicked uselessly in the air. 
Every gun immediately trained on him and with their proximity you knew they wouldn’t miss a fatal shot if it came to it.
“Stop! Don’t shoot! Don’t shoot! Soldier, put him down!” You yelled as you maneuvered towards the edge of the bed. “Please, don't shoot, I can fix this!” you continued, trying to convince yourself as much as you convinced them. Familiar voices joined in on your plea as Sam and Steve finally entered the picture, urgently trying to talk down both the Winter Soldier and the secondary security team. 
“Bucky, It’s okay... Just put the kid down, alright?” Steve tried to reason with him, “He’s new, he doesn’t know what he’s doing yet.” Steve tried his best to stay calm and patient, but the young man was beginning to change colors now. “Bucky, put him down before you do something you can’t come back from.” But Bucky’s ears were deaf to the outside pleas and the Winter soldier refused to listen.
“Ah..!” You whimpered as you tried to stand and approach the commotion. The pain in your leg reached new heights as you tried to put weight on it, causing you to tumble to your knees almost immediately. You clutched your belly, hoping the sudden jostle wouldn’t upset the baby too much as you tried to get up again. 
“Hold on, Y/n. Stay down for a minute so we can wrap your leg…” Sam asked of you, moving over to help as soon as he saw the blood on your hands, “You’re losing plenty already.”
“No, I have to…. I can’t let him get hurt,” you argued, pushing away his helpful hands as you tried to stand again. You heard the crashing thud and rushed voices as you shakily got to your feet, leaning all your weight on your good leg. As you looked up again you came eye to eye with worry-filled icy blues.
“Sol-”
“Мое солнце  [My Sun]...” He interrupted, his metal arm snaking around your waist to pull you in possessively and away from those who threatened your safety. On the other side of the room, the nervous kid now coughed and wheezed for breath, but you were just happy to see he was still alive. 
“Please just listen to them. You’re already hurt, don’t get yourself killed…” you pleaded, your hand barely brushing over his bleeding wound before pulling his hand to your rounded belly. He tried to keep his expression steady, but you saw the way his eyes widened slightly as he looked down. “She needs someone looking out for her and I can’t do this on my own. I can’t keep away all the dangers of the world…” Your forehead rested against his as you tried to shift your weight, whining as you gave up and moved back. You couldn’t deny that this part of Bucky was her father too, even if he had been hidden away for ages, she was still his too. Whether Bucky would see it the same way you weren’t sure, but right now you were just concerned with making sure he got out of this alive. 
“I can’t do this without you…” 
The silence felt deafening as he considered. He never had to think about other people relying on him, not like this. His orders had always been to leave no threats, to finish his job and move on, no matter the cost to him. But the pain in his soft, fleshy shoulder was getting harder to ignore. The way his blood-soaked shirt clung to his arm now climbed to the forefront of his mind as he watched your big eyes stare back at him, desperate to understand. He was between a rock and a hard place. 
“I’ll be right beside you the whole time..” You assured him, “We both will, but please let everyone get us some help.” 
A gentle nudge pushed against his palm as his thoughts swirled around him, snapping him back to a single line of thought and he knew then. Defeat laid heavy on his shoulders as they slumped, accepting what must be done., “Мое солнц [My Sun] …”, He said, “Если вы так хотите, то я не буду жаловаться [If it is what you wish, then I will not complain].” 
You couldn’t tell just how long you had been holding the breath you let out, your muscles relaxing as he finally held his hands up. The security squad began coming forward with an array of cuffs, but it was Sam who stopped them this time, glancing back at you for confirmation as he assured them that they could take it from here. Despite the arguing and the hesitation, they seemed to relent, shifting their focus now to their injured colleague. 
Both Sam and Steve looked tired but relieved as they turned to the two of you, bloody and pained in your current state. Though they weren’t quite better; both of them looked like they had been the unfortunate punching bag of a certain super soldier mere hours before. Sam had bruises lining his arms from where he was surely blocking blow after blow and Steve smiled a bit with his busted lip, dried blood still stuck in the corner of his mouth.
“Let’s get you two to the tower…” 
----
The journey to the tower was quiet, your soldier never letting you out of arms reach as you all boarded the armored truck, and made your way up the tower and to the lab. 
Doctors tried to treat the both of you, but as soon as anyone dared to come close your assassin was right there to growl them back. They’d hardly be able to get past his possessive hands even if they could manage to get close, his touch keeping you pulled beside him at all times.
“Soldat…” you warned him, but he was too preoccupied gathering the medical bag they had been dropped. Coming over to you, there was no warning as he scooped you up from the ground and set you on a table to get to work. 
“Oh-!” You exclaimed as you held onto his strong shoulder, quickly getting plopped back down on the corner of the cold metal table. A shiver ran down your skin as you shifted against the sleek table, watching as practiced hands scoured through the medical bag, producing everything he needed as he went about fixing up your leg wordlessly. 
You were beyond thankful for the haze of the (baby-safe) painkillers as his fingers slid over the raw flesh. Despite the gentle numbing of the painkiller your fingers still lay tangled in his hair as he worked, only tugging in discomfort as the gauze wrapped tightly around your leg.
"Thank you..” You said when he finally finished, moving back to appreciate his work before giving it a satisfactory nod. His eyes had grown distant again, bits of confusion and uncertainty swirling in the storm of his eyes, and you reached out to stroke your thumb across his cheek. His stony cool expression remained as you touched him, his mouth staying a firm line as he instinctively leaned into your palm. You watched him for a moment before you continued, knowing that his thoughts must be far away.
“It's your turn now, big guy.... your shoulder is still seeping and you can’t keep losing blood like this," You urged him just as you had on the ride to the tower. He had refused to listen then, letting nothing else occupy his mind until he knew you were fully taken care of. But now as you sit safely before him, the only looming threats being Sam and Steve who seem to haunt the hallway outside, he finally relented.
You moved to stand, needing the angle to effectively dig out the bullet still lodged in his muscles, but he held you still with a single large hand on your shoulder, "Stay," he urged you with that low rumble of his. His eyes lingered on yours, ensuring you would do as he asked before he began to move again, gathering the supplies you would need.
He slid his bloody shirt off, revealing the weeping wound beneath and the scars of many wounds past. You expected him to stand in front of you, maybe sit so you could take care of him, but that didn’t seem to be the important thing right now.
He climbed up onto the cold table where you sat, curling onto his side with his back facing the door so his wounded shoulder sat closest to you. His head lay in your lap with a look of unmatched serenity as he pressed his forehead against your rounded belly. And there he rested, quiet and unmoving as he took his quiet moment. But he was far too exposed like this, far too trusting of “threats” lurking outside, and he almost reminded you of Bucky again. Was Bucky fighting to come back…? Was the Winter Soldier trusting you to watch his back? … or was he accepting of something you weren't sure he knew yet?
"Are you sure? It's going to be harder to take the bullet out this way. I don’t want to hurt you more than I have to," you tried to explain as you pulled out the forceps.
But he simply shook his head, "I know my time here is short, my Sun..." he said with an even tone, no semblance of fear to shake his voice, "Please let me enjoy it like this…."
Your voice caught in your throat as he answered, his blunt acceptance and knowing catching you off guard. You wished beyond anything that you could soothe him, to tell him no one was going to hurt him or take him away again. But you wouldn’t lie to him, so instead you said nothing, Your words rasping as you replied, "Of course, My star…."
The room was quiet as you worked, the only noise the sweet mumblings from your boyfriend's lips as he filled your baby’s ears with loving promises. His body let out a grunt and a soft squelch as you finally tugged the crushed bullet out. Pain creased his brow but his words never faltered and neither did the nudges or kicks he got in reply.
Carefully you cleaned up the blood, packing the wound as best you could, but you were sure Tony and his team would be redoing it soon nonetheless.
A sigh escaped him as he heard you putting away your tools, "My Sun?" he asked.
"Yes?"
“Is it time…?”
You cast your eyes downward, looking into those confused and swirling blues as they watched you with unbridled hope.
You nodded, wiping away the tears that welled in your eyes, “It’s time…” you whispered.
He nodded, thinking quietly as he looked down at your belly again, his hand smoothing over the skin he’s exposed, “Will I see you two again…?” 
Your heart broke at the slight waver in his voice, “Oh, my star…” you said, resting your palm against his cheek, “It’s just like I said, ‘you can not lose me in any way that would last’. I’ll see you again and again, in this life and the next,” you assured as you leaned down to kiss his temple, a small smile forming at the corners of his lips. Tears blinked from your eyes as you continued, “I don’t know when, or for how long, but you will see us again. You can always come home to me, and I will always be there to welcome you.” You leaned, slow as not to scare him, and kissed him gently as he turned again to look at you.
 It was awkward at first, but you didn’t mind, you couldn’t imagine the last time the Winter Soldier had felt such gentleness, let alone a kiss. 
But the moment was ripped away as the door opened, Steve, Sam, and Tony all standing in the doorway. “We’re ready for him,” Tony said simply, “Let's get this started so my lab techs can go home….” 
-----
You watched behind thick glass as Tony and his team of technicians attached various wires and machinery to Bucky’s body. Sam and Steve’s hands lie on your shoulders, trying to comfort you as you watch them finish tuning and placing everything. You watched as his blue eyes stared vacantly at the ceiling, as still as a statue as he let them do their work.
“I’m sorry, you shouldn’t have to watch this…” Steve tried to comfort you, but you only shook your head. 
“No… I promised I’d see him off,” you replied, then thought with a pause, “Despite all the warnings Bucky gave me I’m happy I got to see him face to face…” 
“Well, it helps that he wasn’t trying to beat the shit out of you…” Sam mumbled, getting an immediate nudge from you right in one of his bruises, “ Ow…okay, point taken.”
You smiled and shook your head. It was true though; despite the fear, blood, and death that dripped from his moniker, despite the pain you endured in his presence, you would do it all again. Bucky had hidden this part of him from you for so long, only ever showing you half of his face. And though you know he wouldn’t like it, you’re happy to finally see him in full light- to know and love him completely as he’s meant to be.
Tony says something that’s hard to make out through the glass, but you see him give a thumbs up to you all so he must have been ready. He moved to the switch, hesitating for a moment to let you say a quick goodbye. 
Your Soldier’s eyes found yours right away, but there was no trace of sorrow for you to see, no discomfort or fear. In fact, he seemed almost excited; excited and hopeful that when he saw you next he’d have a bundle of joy to look forward to as well. 
“Мое солнце [My Sun]...” you watched him say beyond the glass.
“I’ll see you again, My stars. I’m sure of it…” You replied with a soft smile.
He had just enough time to smile softly back at you, an image now pleasantly etched in your brain before Tony flipped the switch and the reset procedure began. 
You covered your eyes quickly as Bucky’s body began to convulse, his strained grunts and shouts breaching containment despite the way he tried to hold it all back. The sounds of pain continued for minutes, but it felt far longer. Though, it wasn’t until it got quiet that you began to worry. 
“Is it done? Is it over...?” You asked the men on either side of you, afraid to peek past your hands for fear of the worst.
“Doll…?” you heard the familiar voice call, gritty and rough from its recent use but still carrying that same soft tone he used with you.
Your heart swelled, “Bucky...?”
_____________
Taglist: @writingmysanity @simpxinnie (sorry I forgot to tag!)
It's been a while since I've written for our favorite sad man, so if I've missed you/you want to be added to the taglist, DM me to let me know!
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sam24 · 3 months
Text
Man on a Mission
Summary: Apparently, someone called Bucky's girl a whore. He has now made it his life's mission to find out who.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader
*****
Bucky sat at the kitchen island, eyes narrowed, leg bouncing, and the same scene from last night replaying in his head.
Bucky drew random patterns on your bare shoulder, his nose buried into your hair. You were being quieter than usual, but he knew you were awake as he could feel your hands fidgeting.
He didn’t want to press you to tell him about it, so he settled on making you feel as loved as possible, pressing kisses into your hair.
Suddenly, you broke the silence, taking Bucky by surprise.
“Buck . . . do you think I’m a whore?”
“Wha-” Bucky lifted his head immediately, trying to look at you. But you hid your face in your hands, turning away from him.
“God don’t look at me. Fuck, this is so embarrassing,” You groaned into your hands. “Forget I said that.”
“No, honey, look at me please,” Bucky gently pulled your hands down, cradling your face. “Who called you that?”
“No, no, no one,” You shook your head frantically. “I’m sorry, just forget I said anything. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“No, sweetheart, who- okay we’ll get back to that later. But you are not a whore, okay? No woman deserves to be called that in the first place. Who-”
“No, no one. I was just . . . I just randomly thought of it.”
Bucky wasn’t convinced, but he let it slide.
For now.
“Well, I don’t want you thinking these things about yourself.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Okay?”
You nodded, seeming relieved and a little surprised that he dropped it that easily.
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
It was now the next morning, and you were at the gym with Natasha, which gave Bucky the perfect opportunity to figure out who to murder.
Steve walked into the kitchen with Sam trailing behind.
“Morning Buck.” Steve greeted. His head stuck into the fridge, trying to look past the shit ton amount of edible cookie dough you had made a couple days earlier.
“How come you didn’t come run with us, you lazy fat ass.” Sam teased, leaning on the island.
“Didn’t feel like it.” Bucky narrowed his eyes.
Suspect 1: Sam Wilson, The Most Annoying Bird Alive
Sam had a tendency to poke fun at people, but some might not take it as well as others. For example, when a barista burst out in tears last week when Sam joked about her being “all over the place” with all the orders coming in. (He came in with flowers the next day)
Bucky wondered if Sam had said something that was supposed to be funny, but you didn’t think it was and got upset.
A part of Bucky wanted to settle on Sam so he had an excuse to beat him up, but the more rational side of him realized that you had gone on one too many missions with him to think he was being serious about anything he said.
Tony then came in, holding a bunch of empty coffee mugs in his hand, practically throwing them into the sink.
“Bruce said my mugs were ‘taking up too much room’ in the lab,” Tony rolled his eyes. “Well why doesn’t he try being the goddamn genius backbone of this team.”
Bucky stared at him intently.
Suspect 2: Tony Stark, The Dick Who Can’t Set His Metal Rock Music Lower Than 98
Tony had a tendency to snap easily, especially when he was low on sleep (which was basically all the time). Everyone usually steered clear of Tony when he was moody, because he would most definitely say the meanest things, but not really mean any of it.
Bucky tried to think if it was logical that Tony would snap at you and say something. However, he came to the conclusion that even if Tony had said something, you had known him for too long to take his sleep-deprived words to heart.
“What are you looking at, Winter Schnitzel?” Tony challenged, noticing Bucky staring at him.
“Nothing.” Bucky replied, his stare shifting over to his best friend, who was grinning in amusement, but still trying to find something to eat that wouldn’t give him diabetes.
Suspect 3: Steve Rog-
Bucky stopped himself, almost laughing at himself for thinking Steve would ever call a woman a whore.
Even though you always kept the fridge full of random items you would make, Steve would never say a single bad thing about you.
For now, Bucky was stuck.
⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃
6 hours later, and Bucky was still stuck.
You and Peter were out (God knows where), which was another perfect chance for Bucky to think.
But the problem was he couldn’t think of anyone.
Everyone in the compound adored you, so Bucky couldn’t figure out who the hell would deliberately say something to make you upset.
He dragged his shoes across the floor, cursing Steve in his head for making him go on a “stroll” because he apparently looked “pent-up”.
There was no way in hell Bucky would walk around outside, so he opted to take a walk inside, using Mother Steve’s demand to his advantage to scout out potential targets.
He halfheartedly glanced around the floor, stopping when his gaze landed on you.
He immediately grinned, not caring about the fact he probably looked crazy, and started his way over to where you were.
You were talking to someone with a bag in your hand. Bucky remembered you saying something about picking up a dress from the store for your friend. Peter was next to you, and for some reason, puffing his chest out?
But, as Bucky got closer, he realized you were talking to Jacob, the little dickwad who couldn’t take no for an answer,
“How many times do I have to tell you? Get out of my way. I’m trying to get this to someone.” Bucky heard you snap, tuning in with his enhanced hearing.
Bucky stopped, trying to assess the situation and figure out if you would appreciate him stepping in or not.
He knew you didn’t need anyone to stand up for you, but his overprotective side rippled through his body, his jaw clenching and fists balling.
“Baby, stop acting- “Jacob was cut off with a sharp slap.
The little bastard was taken by complete shock.
Meanwhile, Peter was still trying to look as intimidating as possible.
“Jacob, what the hell is your problem? I’ve told you to leave me alone more times than I can count. How fucking thick is your skull?”
Jacob was about to reply, with probably something bitchy, but he caught sight of Bucky in the corner with the most murderous glare and stopped himself.
He instead looked down and stepped to the side, giving you and Peter room to go.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Beat it.” Peter growled in the most non-threatening way possible as you two left, giving Bucky the perfect chance to slide in before Jacob could hightail out of there.
“Barnes.” Jacob greeted, clearing his throat.
“Callaway.” Bucky’s blood boiled at how differently he treated other men than how he treated women. “Didn’t your mother ever teach you to respect a lady?”
Before Jacob could reply, his equally dumb friend, Brody, walked past the two men.
“Damn, Jake. Barnes finally here to beat you up for calling his girl a whore?”
Bucky and Jacob both stared at Brody.
Jacob looked sickly pale, and Bucky looked calmly terrifying. Clear sign he was fucking enraged.
“Oh shit-” Brody finally put the pieces together, practically sprinting away.
Bucky turned back to face a petrified looking Jacob.
“So,” Bucky reached out, fixing Jacob’s tie and smoothing down his collar. “It was you, huh?”
Jacob tensed under Bucky’s touch.
“Chill pal, I just wanna talk.”
⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃
A bruised cheek, wet underwear, and hurt ego later, Jacob’s talk with Bucky was over.
Bucky threw his feet up on the ottoman, but not before telling Friday to make sure Jacob was apologizing to you, as instructed by Bucky himself.
He patiently waited for you on the couch, a wide grin appearing on his face as you walked in and cuddled up next to Bucky, but not without pressing a kiss to his lips first.
Halfway through the movie, you turned to look at Bucky.
“Thank you,” You smiled.
“For what, doll?”
You turned back to face the movie, a smile playing at your lips. “C’mon. I know that was you. He would never apologize on his own will.”
Bucky laughed, turning you around once again to pepper kisses all over your face.
“I love you, my little smartass.”
“I love you too, pops.”
Mission accomplished.
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itsthewritergal · 28 days
Text
One Week - B.Barnes x reader
PART 1
PART 3
Here is part two my loves, there will be a final 3rd part,
TW: suicide, death, character death, breakup, general sadness, suicide notes, swearing.
(also I won't be making a taglist for the next part so please turn notifs on so you don't miss it!)
Bucky couldn’t watch, he had resulted to cleaning the blood from between the joints on his metal hand. The quinjet hummed slowly, providing little comfort to Bucky’s swirling thoughts.  Steve and Wanda were talking quietly, not quietly enough for Bucky’s liking. 
“Did you read yours?” Steve asked, gesturing to the letter that Wanda had clutched in her hand 
“No, I won’t. She wrote it for me to read when she wasn’t here. She is here. I don’t need to read it” Wanda said sadly, her letter was still sealed in the envelope with her name neatly swirled on the front. Her eyes fell on Y/N’s sleeping frame, Tony had taken the decision to sedate her, she had refused to be taken out of the cell, still clutching desperately to the hope of death. They had all tried their hardest to level with her, but nothing worked, everyone had tried their best, everyone except Bucky. He couldn’t find a single word to say to her as she was desperately asking everyone to kill her. 
“We will be landing at the compound in ten minutes” Tony said to nobody in particular but everyone stopped and listened 
“I think we should take her to a hospital” Nat said calmly, she was too calm for Bucky’s liking. He couldn’t understand how she wasn’t tearing herself apart for letting Y/N get to this state. 
“She needs to be at home” Tony said firmly 
“The compound isn’t her home” Nat answered curtly 
“It used to be” Wanda mused, thinking of the days that Y/N had spent wandering around the compound as she watched Bucky training, or cooking together, it used to be her home. 
“It isn’t now” Clint agreed with Nat, “A few months ago I would have said the same Tony, but now, well now she needs to be at a hospital. She needs to be given the choice to come back with us” 
“Cap?” Tony asked, 
“I agree” Steve said, 
“So do I” Sam added, 
Bucky stayed silent.
“Fine, I’ll reroute to the hospital” Tony said with a sigh. 
“Mr Stark, Dr Cho told me you were on your way, I’m Doctor Simmonds, I’ll be treating Y/N today,” A doctor said meeting Tony at the entrance door to the Quinjet, 
“You need to treat this girl as though she’s one of ours, understand?” Tony said firmly, 
“I understand” He said simply following a few nurses as they placed Y/N onto a stretcher and carried her into the hospital, “Can you tell me the extent of her injuries?” He asked 
“We haven’t examined her” Nat interrupted, “She was held for around 23 hours, we are unsure of what happened.” 
“I understand, now if you could all wait outside. I’m going to examine her and let you know what I’ve found” He said as he disappeared behind a closed door that Y/N was lying behind. 
“We should have gone in with her” Steve said, 
“He needs to do his job, and we need to wait” Wanda softly said, there was a nervous edge to her words, Bucky picked up on it. 
“Coffee anyone?” Nat suggested, a few nodded, “Bucky come help me” She said 
“You can handle it” Bucky said his gaze still on the floor 
“Now Bucky” Nat left no room for argument and Bucky followed her silently through the halls. “You need to tell me what happened” She said firmly 
“I don’t know what you mean” Bucky replied 
“When you broke up, what the hell happened?” Nat said, her eyes flaming with something Bucky didn’t want to deal with 
“We broke up” he said bluntly “There isn’t anything else to say” 
“You’ve been seeing other people whilst she’s been planning her suicide” She whispered fiercely, “What the hell did you do to her?”  It was one of the only times Bucky had seen Nat loose her cool in such a dramatic way, 
“Nothing happened” He reiterated simply 
“Don’t be that guy” nat snapped, “Five coffee’s please, black, double shot in all of them” She said to the girl stood starstruck behind the counter 
“Look, nothing happened” Bucky said “We split” 
“Who made the decision?” 
“I did” he replied, his eyes fixating on his boots once more, 
“Why?” 
“We didn’t work together, do you need a full rundown on my life?” He snapped louder than he wanted, 
“Just on your breakup” Nat replied quickly, “Why didn’t you work?” 
“I couldn’t do it, she was too much.” He didn’t mean it, he didn’t know how he could explain it in any other way to Nat 
“Too much how?” 
“Here you are” the girl behind the counter placed the coffees down, Nat muttered a thank you. 
“I like my life, I like being alone. I enjoy coming home alone. I don’t need anyone else in my life to look after,” He snapped, 
“You’re not telling the truth” Nat whispered “You forget, I used to be the best interrogator that SHIELD had ever seen. I see through you Bucky, and whatever you did to hurt that girl—”
“I told her I didn’t love her,” he whispered “I told her she was too much for me. Told her that she was naive and young and stupid.  I said that I didn’t want to deal with her or look after her or have to love her” 
“Why would you do that?” 
“Because I was scared, she is good. She is innocent, and kind, and gentle, and she kissed me as if I was good too. I’m not. So I ended things, and I said things that I won’t ever repeat because the words already haunt me enough” he sighed “I dated those girls after her because they weren’t good people, or nice people, I suited them better, there wasn’t anything to ruin. With Y/N, I was killing her slowly and she didn’t even know it” Bucky said, his chest heaving once he finished , 
“Bucky” Nat started, 
“I needed her to hate me” He said softly, 
“You failed” Tony said from behind him, “I came to help get the coffee” He explained once Nat gave him a confused look “She doesn’t hate you, she hates herself. I dread to think what she’s been thinking of herself the past few months because of you” 
“Tony enough” Nat stopped him 
“Y/N is lying in a hospital bed sedated because he was a coward” Tony snapped, “When she wakes up, you best hope that she forgives you, because if there’s a shred of anything other than forgiveness in her words I will kill you” He said turning and walking away. His words were calm, and collected, Bucky knew he was sincere. It should have scared him, but it didn’t. 
“Mr Stark?” Dr Simmonds asked coming out of Y/N’s room, 
“How is she?” Tony stood up from the uncomfortable plastic chair, 
“We need to admit her to an inpatient facility” His voice made Bucky’s blood run cold, “In order to do this I need a signature from her next of kin” he continued to explain, “I reached out to her sister, who is on file as her next of kin, except it seems that she passed away a few months back and I need to know if there are any other living relatives for me to contact for permission” The room went silent, 
“Her sister died?” Wanda parroted 
“According to our records around ten months ago” Dr Simmonds said, 
“She doesn’t have any other family, her parents died when she was little and her sister was all she had left” Bucky said stoically 
“This isn’t the answer you’re going to want to hear but without a next of kin I can’t admit her” Dr Simmonds explained softly 
“We can look after her at the compound” Tony said, 
“Tony, we can’t make a decision like that without talking to her” Steve cut in. 
“I agree with the Captain, Mr Stark. She’s still drowsy from the sedation but uprooting her in the state she’s in isn’t a good idea” 
“What state is she in?” Nat asked 
“She’s malnourished, dehydrated, exhausted. Nothing physically wrong apart from a few minor lacerations and bruising, but she’s not been taking care of herself. If you hadn’t told me she’d only been taken for 24 hours I’d have guessed it would have been at least 3 months” He explained 
“She’s depressed” Tony muttered softly 
“Without talking to her at length I can’t make that diagnosis, she’s clearly grieving her sister. Amongst other things but I don’t know what those are yet. I’ve asked for psych to come and give her a full examination just so we know what we are dealing with. But without a next of kin, my hands are tied” 
“What about an old next of kin?” Bucky asked slowly, 
“Y/N would have to sign off on it, are you a past next of kin for her?” The Dr asked, eyeing Bucky with a look of distain, the pieces clicking into place slowly. Bucky nodded, “I’d have to check with the board” The Dr explained. 
“Can we see her?” Wanda asked changing the subject quickly. 
“I will ask her, but I’m not promising anything” Dr Simmonds said with a nod, retuning back behind the closed door.  
The next few minutes were painful, nobody dared to sit down in case Y/N asked to see them. Bucky could hear muffled voices behind the door and it killed him that Y/N was so close but he couldn’t reach her, he wouldn’t dare to reach her in case of anything making her worse. 
“Mr Stark” Dr Simmonds said stepping out the room, “She has agreed to see you” 
Tony didn’t say a word and instead followed the doctor through the door and into the room. Y/N was sat in bed, restraints lay idle on the bed, untied, Tony’s eyes went straight to them. 
“They took them off about an hour ago” She said quietly, knowing what Tony was thinking. 
“How are you feeling?” He asked carefully sitting in a plastic chair that had been placed at her bedside, 
“I’m sorry” She said, calmly. 
“None of that” Tony said firmly, patting her hand comfortingly 
“I didn’t want anyone to know, I just needed it to be over” She said “And then they came and it seemed like the best way out. I’m sorry I put you through all that” 
“You don’t need to apologise,” Tony said “Let me help you, please?” 
“I’ve spoken to the doctor, lots of doctors and I’m okay. Really. I’m okay” She promised sincerely
“They want to admit you” Tony said slowly, watching as Y/N’s face fell, 
“They said”
“They can’t though, because of your next of kin. They need a signature and it—”
“She’s dead” Y/N bluntly whispered  
“I would like for you to come and live at the compound for the next few weeks, just until you get back on your feet” He said softly 
“I won’t put you or anyone else through that” 
“You mean Bucky” Tony said, he knew it was risky to bring him up but he needed to know how best to help Y/N. 
Y/N’s eyes glazed over sadly, and she pulled her knees up to her chest. 
“This isn’t his fault. Believe it or not the breakup was actually probably the least bad thing that happened this year” She said with a half hearted chuckle, 
“I’m sorry, I should have been there for you” Tony said, “everyone is here to help. Just let us look after you for a week. That’s all” 
“I promise I’m okay” 
“I know you are, I need to do this for me, let me help” Tony said, it was a lie. He needed to know that Y/N was somewhere safe and once she was there for a week he could convince her to stay longer, he was sure of it. 
“One week” 
“One week” Tony nodded. 
Tony had instructed Wanda, Bucky and Steve to set up a room for Y/N whilst he filled out some paperwork for Y/N. 
“How are you feeling?” Steve asked Bucky as they walked through the empty compound, towards one of the guest rooms, 
“I don’t think you should be asking me that” Bucky kept his eyes trained on the ground. His shoulders hunched, 
“This is as hard on you as it is on her” Wanda said 
“It’s not, I never tried to end my life. I made her do that. It was my words that forced her into that position” Bucky said, his filter had gone, he was bleeding raw emotions onto the floor of the compound and he couldn’t stop. 
“That wasn’t your fault, you can’t stay with someone just in case they get depressed when you leave. That’s basically blackmail” Steve said 
“She didn’t deserve this. I promised her I’d be with her for the rest of her life. I swore she’d never be alone again and then I left. I’m no better than anyone else in her life” 
“She doesn’t hate you” Wanda said, 
“What?” Bucky asked, 
“I read the letter, I didn’t think I was going to but I couldn’t stop myself” Wanda said pulling it out of her pocket “but she told me that it wasn’t your fault” 
“Stop” Bucky said, 
“Bucky she didn’t do it because of you” Wanda said 
“She needs some plants in here” Bucky said firmly as they opened up the door to Y/N’s new room, 
“Buck” Steve started 
“And her fairy lights, on the ceiling, she likes them to look like stars” Bucky continued. “We don’t have very long, we need to get started”
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stuckysbike · 4 months
Text
Moonlight Kisses
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: Angst, unrequited?feelings. Fluff.
Summary: You’ve fallen in love, but he wants someone else, and it’s you he’s asking for advice!
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It was a cold December Friday night when you realised you were in love with Bucky Barnes.
Natasha had ushered you out of your solitude and over to her private apartment on the compound. Steve was already there, along with Sam, Joaquin, Yelana, a few from the medical team and a few mechanics.
The place was decorated for winter, with playful snowmen and fuzzy christmas trees stacked in the corners. Everyone got comfortable on the big couch and music played in the background whilst you snacked on festive foods and sipped seasonal alcoholic drinks.
Bucky had been telling a story, his face lit up and his big hands flying everywhere as he described his mom chasing him with a broom during his teenage years after a stray snowball missed its target and landed on her. Occasionally his eyes met yours and they sparkled with mischief, but you figured he was like that with everyone.
You’d been crushing on him since you arrived in January and he was first to greet you. He seemed fascinated by your job, research and data analyst, but it was ultimately boring to almost everyone but you.
You lunched together sometimes and you swapped books every few weeks. You even got him into podcasts and you were always swapping recommendations.
But tonight he looked happy, relaxed even, and when Natasha dropped her dainty feet into his lap you felt the world skip underneath you, you wanted to put your feet in his lap. You wanted his big hands dwarfing your feet.
He rubbed her toes without thinking, and she snuggled down as the mechanics started describing the prank they’d played on Tony this week, going so far as to rope Pepper in. Bucky was listening intently, laughing along with them but his hands never stopped moving. It was obvious they were intimate with each other from the tiny looks and touched they shared.
You couldn’t understand why your heart suddenly ached, and then it hit you like a train. You were jealous, more than jealous, the revelation of their relationship hurt.
“Wanna stay here tonight?” You heard Natasha murmur to Bucky during a lull in conversation. Yelana was changing the music and Joaquin was setting up tequila shots.
He smiled at her but shook his head. “Nah,” his voice was thick with tiredness.
“You finally made a move on that girl?” She teased wiggling in her spot.
Bucky’s cheeks tinged pink and you dropped your eyes when you realised you were staring. You didn’t want to be caught looking like some dumb kid. You studied your hands but your head was swimming with this sudden realisation.
It was foolish to think that Bucky with his wonderful abilities and handsome looks would be interested in you who spent most of your time at work or alone. Bucky had been to hell and back, he deserved someone gorgeous who could distract him from reality
“Think I’m gonna’ take her out, yeah,” he nodded. You snuck a glance at him in time to catch him looking from you to Natasha.
Oh god, he must have noticed you staring. How embarrassing!
Tears that had no right to form in your eyes were there anyway and you stood suddenly distracting Steve who was kneeling at the coffee table next to you. Sam took the opportunity to defeat him in their thumb war game much to Steve’s annoyance.
“I’m going to head back, I’m just really tired,” you said to the room, avoiding Bucky and trying to look above Natasha’s head. “Thank you for the invitation Natasha.”
There were a few comments asking you to stay but ultimately everyone wished you a good sleep. Your own room was a fifteen minute walk away in a shared block and you pulled your arms around yourself to fight the cold as you stepped outside. You wished you brought more than a hoodie to keep you warm.
You looked up into the sky and focused on the moon and sucked a deep breath of cold air deep into your lungs. It grounded you so you did it again.
“Hey Doll,” Bucky called startling you. You hadn’t noticed him leaving behind you but he was closer than you expected.
“Bucky, hi,” you frowned.
“Thought I’d walk you back,” he said falling into step with you. “And I wanted your advice.”
“Oh?”
“So there’s this girl I like. She’s not like the others, she’s not really - she’s different. And I really want to make a date special for her, you know?” He glanced as you, letting his arm bump yours as you walked.
“I do,” you sighed resigning yourself to your fate. You didn’t want to have this conversation but you didn’t want to not help him either. He was your friend after all and despite your feelings you would be there for him no matter what.
“So I’ve had a few first date ideas, but I’m thinking farmers market then making brunch together? I started this really great podcast and I was thinking we could listen together as we cook then talk about it while we eat? Then after we could go to a museum or something?” Bucky licked his lips and stopped turning to look at you.
You didn’t want him to share a podcast with her. That was your thing with him. You knew you were being unfair, childish even but right now you didn’t care. His deep blue eyes searched your face. He looked so vulnerable in that moment.
“That sounds lovely,” you said. And it did, you wished you were that girl, you wished Bucky wanted to go to all that trouble for you but instead you’d have to sit home alone tomorrow whilst he woo’d someone else. You hoped it would be a long time before you were forced to meet her.
“Yeah?” He asked excitedly. “I really just wanna’ hold her hand, at the market, in the museum, I just crave that feeling you know, like this,” Bucky reached for your hand and laced your fingers together, holding your joined hands up to inspect. “It’s been a long time since I held a girls hand like this.”
“I-I’m sure it has Buck,” you swallowed. His hand dwarfed yours and his heat easily crept onto your skin. His thumb caressed your knuckles and your breath hitched but Bucky didn’t seem to notice.
He resumed walking and you could do nothing but join him, he still had your hand in his. He described his outfit for his date and wondered if you had a cosy chunky sweater.
“I do, it’s so comfortable,” you said softly. You couldn’t hide the disappointment as you slowed in front of the doors. “It’s my favourite colour too.”
“Will you wear it tomorrow?” Bucky tilted his head to the side.
“Why does it matter what I wear?” You couldn’t help but giggle at his odd request. You couldn’t do it though, thinking of him with someone else whilst you wore what he asked you to.
“I want to know that you’re warm tomorrow. You know, on our date?” Bucky pressed his cool left hand on your cheek as he turned to face you. His kiss was soft, just a sweet brush of the lips and then he pulled away. “I’ll see you at nine thirty?”
“Uh huh,” you nodded dumbly. He kissed you again, and you caught the faint taste of whiskey on his lips. He was warm as he pressed into you and you let your hands slide up his chest to his shoulders.
“See you tomorrow baby girl,” he pressed one last kiss to your forehead then opened the building door for you.
You walked inside in a daze, waving goodbye and drifting up the stairs like you weighed nothing.
You couldn’t remember getting changed into your pj’s, all you knew was that you were snuggled under your duvet setting an alarm for your date with Bucky in the morning.
You smiled, and suddenly your legs kicked and you let out a little squeal. You were going out with Bucky Barnes and he kissed you three times.
You feel asleep to the memory of one hot hand and one cold hand cupping your cheeks as he kissed you in the moonlight.
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noacfslut · 12 days
Text
hot to go! - matty healy
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order up, i'm hot to go!
working as a waitress at a diner could be quite a drag, at least it was until you started getting a certain curly haired regular who was determined to break down your 'hard to get' act each week through flirtatious banter and dirty jokes that had your cheeks flushed pink. but who were you to complain when he tipped so well and was so nice to look at? (diner!au <3)
inspired by HOT TO GO! by chappell roan <3
minors do not interact!
tags: 18+, matty is so unbelievably cheeky and flirty in this, like it's kind of insane, slow burn (in terms of anything physical), two idiots falling in love one chocolate milkshake at a time, oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, praise, overstimulation, cum play if you squint
26719 words
“Order up!” You heard from behind you as you poured a cup of coffee into a mug, the sound of a bell dinging shortly after. You huffed, setting the coffee pot back down into its home, gripping the hot mug between your fingers as you turned to grab the hot plate off of the serving window, one of the cooks smiling through the empty space at you as you slid the plate off of the silver metal hatch. “That was quick.”
You rolled your eyes playfully at the cook, Nick, huffing as you shook your head softly. You were turning on your heels before he could tease you any further, zig zagging through the other servers behind the counter, dropping off the mug filled with coffee to the older gentleman sitting at the very end of the counter in the last barstool before turning the corner and making your way to a table that sat a couple. 
“Sorry about the wait, they were cooking more onion rings back there.” You apologized with a small smile, sliding the plate of food over to the man who had been waiting to receive his plate, the woman across from him having already had hers for a few minutes now. They both were quick to assure you that it was fine, thanking you. “Is there anything else I can get for you guys?”
You nodded kindly when they declined your offer, turning on your heels to check on the booth behind the couple, cleaning up their empty plates and accepting the cash tip with a smile. You balanced the empty plates on the palm of your hand as you made your way back up to the counter, handing them off to the bus boy - Johnny, before leaning back against the counter and crossing one of your heels over the other. 
Wednesdays were prone to dragging by, always the slowest day of the week, constantly checking the time on the clock that hung on the wall surrounded by old highway signs and coca cola advertisements. There just wasn’t enough customers to keep yourself busy, causing the minutes to drag by like hours and have you resisting the urge to pull your hair out as you listened to the same twenty songs playing out of the digital jukebox on a constant loop - normally the chatter in the diner drowned out the sound of the playlist your boss, Tony, refused to stray away from. But with the few people scattered around the diner, it was hard not to focus on the sound of Elvis Presley singing Jailhouse Rock for what felt like the millionth time since you clocked in this afternoon. 
You were staring down at your manicured nails when Ruth, who was arguably your favorite coworker here, slid into the open space next to you and knocked her shoulder against your own to draw your attention up to her - tilting her head to the side. 
“Who is that?” You felt your eyebrows scrunch together ever so softly, eyes sliding over in the direction that Ruth had tilted her head in and landing on a boy you were positive that you had never seen around here before, sure that you would remember someone like him. 
The stranger looked like he just walked straight out of Grease with the way his curly hair was ever so slightly pushed back, ringlets of curls falling over his forehead as he stared down at the menu on the table before him - dark eyes scanning over the various options, you could see his eyebrow twitching in distress from all the way across the diner.
Even though you were sure you had never seen him around before, you couldn’t help but think that he looked as though he belonged there. Sitting in the red booth with a leather jacket covering arms that you would bet money on being covered in tattoos, your eyes scanned over his frame unashamed, only because he had no clue your eyes were on him - taking in the sight of the remainder off his outfit, all black and dangerous, almost as if the universe was sending you warning signs before you could even approach him. 
You watched as he chewed on the inside of his cheek as he continued to flip through the menu of the diner, clearly growing more frustrated as he turned over page after page, running a hand through his hair in aggravation and - oh, did you like the sight of that. His fingers passing through his dark, slightly damp hair, you could only assume it must have been raining outside - the stray droplets on the leather of his jacket confirmed your suspicions. Long, thick, rough fingers that would feel so good running along the expanse of your body, down to the inside of your thighs and sliding inside -
You cleared your throat, forcing away the thoughts in your mind with it, straightening your back against the counter and smirking. “Dibs.”
“Hey!” Ruth gasped, shaking her head when you just winked at her in return as you tighten your ponytail, smoothing out the skirt of your uniform before sauntering over to the mysterious man who was already the most exciting part of your day.
Your converse covered feet clicked against the black and white checkered tile of the diner, your heart rate picking up in pace and face heating the closer you got to the stranger, quickly realizing that he was impossibly more attractive up close. He could feel your presence next to the booth, glancing up at you with eyes that slightly widened and immediately brightened when they landed on you.
You held back a snort when his dark brown eyes scanned over your frame, one of his thick eyebrows raised ever so slightly as he drank in the sight of your bare legs - men. 
You bit back a smile, clearing your throat before you introduce yourself, his dark eyes back on your face, hanging onto your every word and causing you to stumble a couple of times through the practiced spiel you spoke to every single customer that came through the diner - embarrassed that he already had this much of an affect on you. The boy with curly hair nodded softly when you told him your name, seeming as though he was in a daze as his dark eyes strayed from your face once more to drag down the expanse of your body as if he was trying to memorize every freckle and curve. 
It was only when you shifted your weight between your feet, the heat of his stare becoming too much for you to handle, did the mysterious boy clear his throat and find his voice to speak to you. “Hi, Mat-” His voice cracking, high in pitch. Clearing his throat once more, a twinge of pink spreading along his cheekbones, the sight of him flustered by your presence was impossibly endearing - the blush creeping up his neck making him even more attractive and even more difficult to focus on the task at hand. His voice was now much deeper as he opened his mouth to try again. “Hi, I’m Matty.”
You smiled softly, running your eyes along his face unashamed, thinking that the name suited him. “Hi, Matty.” 
The boy, Matty, shifted against the red leather of the booth while clearing his throat once more. “Hi.”
The two of you stared at one another for a beat, holding eye contact until you couldn’t take it anymore, breaking away from it while fighting a smile off of your face. You shook your head softly as you pulled your notepad from the apron tied around your waist, tilting your head to the side slightly as you glanced over the top of the paper at him, only to see his dark eyes still staring at you - the both of you breaking into a fit of soft laughter at catching the other. You shook your head more intensely this time, shaking the nerves as you took a deep breath to calm down the pounding of your heart, bringing the pen up to the notepad and ready to actually do your job. “You ready to order?”
Matty inhaled a breath so deep that it puffed his cheeks out, exhaling it in a tight laugh as he tossed down the menu that he had been holding in his hand. “Can I be honest?” Matty brought his long, distracting fingers to the back of his head to scratch his neck. “I have no fucking clue.”
You couldn't help the giggle that tumbled from your lips, your shoulders shaking and your head following suit. “In your defense, it is a really big menu.”
“Oh, it’s massive.” Matty agreed through a laugh of his own, nodding in agreement. “I don’t know how you remember it all.”
“I don’t know.” You shrugged, tilting your head to the side and giving an overly bright smile. “Must be this big brain of mine.”
“Oh,” Matty nodded, a smile spreading steady over his face as he leaned back in the booth, tossing a leather jacket covered arm over the back of it. “She’s got beauty and brains, I see.”
You cursed the red that tainted your cheeks, turning your head into your shoulder to try and hide it from the boy staring up at you but you knew he had already noticed the effect his bold words had on you if the look he was giving you told you anything. You shook your head, staring down at the frilly socks that peaked out over the top of your high top converse. Matty took pity on you, clearing his throat once more to ease the tension he had created. “What do you recommend?”
Normally when first time customers asked you this question, you wanted to rip your hair out, why couldn't they just pick something off of the menu and go about their day? But now that Matty was curious, you found yourself desperate to think of something that he would love, eager to please and impress him. “Uhm.” You swallowed thickly as he stared up at you expectantly. “A burger, maybe? You can’t go wrong with a good classic, right?”
“Alright.” Matty nodded, taking your suggestion without any form of argument, sliding the menu across the table and closer to you - the laminated edges brushing against your thigh in the process. “Throw me in a chocolate milkshake too, will you, darling?”
You had just gotten your cheeks back to normal only for him to have the blood rushing back to them at the nickname. You were used to being flirted with on the job, sure that you had heard every pick up line under the sun at this point, but something about the way it fell from Matty’s pink, plump lips had your stomach in a whirl. 
“You got it.” You smiled, blindly reaching down to grab the menu off of the table, not wanting to look away from his face - wanting to study every crevice and cranny so you would never forget it. You hadn’t realized that his hand had lingered on the menu until your fingers were brushing against his own, blaming the jolt you felt from the touch of his skin against your own on static, swallowing thickly and quick to scoop the menu up and into your arms - desperate to put some space between the two of you so you could actually breathe and have it reach down to your lungs.
Matty’s eyes were heavy on you, dark and dangerous and all but gleaming up at you. You shot him a tight smile, nodding your head down at him before turning on your heels and nearly sprinting to the front of the diner, tossing the laminated menu off to the side so you could grab onto the tiled counter with both hands. Your head hung between your shoulders as you released a breath you hadn’t even realized you had been holding in, only having a moment of alone time before Ruth was crowding your space. 
“Should I clear the restaurant out so the two of you can fuck? I mean Jesus.” Ruth teased, you forced out a laugh in return, heart pounding against your ribcage - embarrassed that Matty still had such an affect on you even with the distance between the two of you. “He was looking at you like he’d rather eat you for dinner.”
You couldn’t even argue with Ruth because she was right, he had been staring at you like he could eat you alive in front of everyone, the idea was tempting. But you found yourself shaking your head before you could allow yourself to go down that rabbit hole. “It wasn’t like that.”
“You can’t be serious.” Ruth laughed through a scoff, glancing over in the direction you had just come from. “I mean, he’s literally still staring at you right now.”
“Oh my god.” You groaned, grabbing her arm and pulling her in a way that forced her body to turn away from Matty, as you had been standing. “It doesn’t matter how he’s looking at me, I can’t do it.”
“Are you-” Ruth cut herself off to huff. “Why can’t you? He’s hot, he’s into you, like-” Ruth cut herself off again in favor of looking over her shoulder to confirm that Matty was still staring over at them. “Really into you.” You sighed, squeezing your eyes shut and gripping the counter tighter. “I mean, you were just telling me how long it’s been since, you know.” You shot a glare your friend's way at her words, causing her to raise her hands in defense. “Look, I’m just saying that I think this could be really good for you.”
You sighed once more, holding your breath before finding the courage to look over your shoulder yourself, immediately making eye contact with dark, dangerous eyes. Matty smiled when he noticed you looking back at him, raising his hand to wave softly at you. You groaned, turning around to drop your head between your shoulders again. “I can’t.”
“But-” 
You cut Ruth off before she could even argue. “I’ll have my fun flirting with him while he’s here and forget about him as soon as he pays, he’s probably just passing through town.” You huff, taking your arms off of the counter and standing more straight up. “I’ll never see him again.”
“Exactly.” Ruth stressed. “Even more reason to just go for it. You’ll never see him again.”
You fixed your friend with a look that had her rolling her eyes. “Fine. But you’re not allowed to complain to me about your needs ever again, I tried to help you out.”
You snorted, shaking your head through a laugh. “Deal.”
So you soaked up the little time you had with Matty, giggling at his jokes and blushing at his advances until it eventually came time for him to pay his bill and leave you behind - but not before asking you for your phone number, scratching the back of his neck out of nerves as he did so. You felt bad rejecting him, doing so with a smile, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to hand out your phone number to another guy just to wait around for a call that would never come. You could tell by looking at Matty that he had a line of women that would wrap laps around the diner, you weren’t special, you were just entertaining for the night. He’d forget about you in the morning and you couldn’t stomach the thought, not when you knew you’d never forget about him. 
You teased Matty to ease the disappointment in his shoulders. “You’ll have to come back to get it.”
The words hurt to say, knowing deep down that you’d never see him again, yet still trying to  delude yourself into thinking they were true. Hard to face reality when Matty was staring down at you with a smug smile and promising that he’d be back to get it before walking out of the diner and out of your life for what you thought was forever. 
Oh, if only you fucking knew. 
“Right, sorry.” Your voice was tight, as tight as your jaw as you swallowed down what you really wanted to say to the customer sitting in the booth beneath you. “I’ll get this fixed for you.”
You shot the brightest, fakest smile you could muster up at the middle aged blonde woman in the booth before grabbing the plate from the table, waiting until you were three steps away from her before rolling your eyes and dropping the fake theatrics all together. “Why the fuck would I have known you wouldn’t want bacon on a bacon cheeseburger?” You mumbled to yourself, cursing the woman, as you walked back up to the front of the diner.
You turn around to push the door to the kitchen open with your shoulder, immediately feeling eyes on you as you make your way over to the counter next to the stove and toss the plate full of fresh, hot food onto it with a hefty sigh. “Hey, now, don’t come back here with that type of attitude.” 
You laughed softly, bringing your hands up to rub at your face out of frustration, peeking through your fingers at the man that the teasing tone belonged to. Ricky stared at you with a raised eyebrow, a glimmer of playfulness in his dark eyes. “Sorry, I’m just-” You cut yourself off, deeming that the gesture of choking the air was a better explanation than any words could have expressed. “you know?” 
A mixture of laughter echoed throughout the kitchen, the men back in the kitchen all stopping their task at hand to listen to you complain about the awful day you were having - about the cup of coffee you had dropped within the first hour of your shift, the ceramic shattering against the checkered floor, dark liquid spreading against the black and white checkered floor. The way that your boss, the owner of The City Diner - Tony, had bitched at you for dropping it, imitating his rough voice and earning more laughter as you relived the conversation with him. You were halfway through your story about the blonde bitch in the booth when you heard your name being called through the window, stopping your story in favor of looking over at who was calling for your attention. 
Ruth had her elbows on the metal of the serving window, leaning in with a shit eating grin that told you everything you needed to know about what she was about to say - but she chose to tease you anyway, raising her voice in a sing-song manner and batting her eyelashes. 
“Your boyfriend is here.” Wolf whistles were heard from beside you as you groaned with a roll of your eyes at your coworkers' antics. “Right on time.”
“He’s not my boyfriend.” You tried to argue, but it didn't matter, your coworkers had already started to tease you. 
“Oh, that will cheer her right up.” Nick teased, tossing a towel over his shoulder and crossing his arms over his chest with a smug smile spread over his unshaven face. “What do we think this time, boys?” You glared at the cook as he glanced around the room with furrowed brows. “Ten minutes before he spews a pick up line?”
“Ha.” Ricky laughed, shaking his head and giving you a once over. “Five minutes, max.”
You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest, glaring at the men with a stare that you wish could catch fire, rolling your eyes with a deep huff when Ruth decided to chime in. “You guys clearly don’t know him at all.” The brunette argued, glancing over her shoulder at what you could only assume was the booth you knew a familiar head of curls was sitting. “He’ll say hello to her and then immediately tell her how pretty she looks today.”
“Alright.” Nick nodded, glancing over in the same direction Ruth just had, narrowing his eyes. “Five bucks?”
“Deal.” Ruth leaned through the window further to shake her hand with Nick’s, Ricky walked over to join in. You cleared your throat, fixing them all with an unimpressed stare that they smiled back to in return. 
“Wow, I’m so glad that you guys are placing bets on my love life.” You huffed, shifting your weight between your feet under their stares, Nick’s eyebrow still raised as he tilted his head to the side.
“Love life? I thought you weren’t interested in the bloke.” Nick stared at you expectantly, all eyes in the kitchen on you as they had caught you red handed, you huffed at the slip up. 
“I’m not.” You argued with a meek voice, tightening your arms over your chest when the entire kitchen broke out in a mix of “sure.” and “yeah, right.”
Nick rolled his eyes, but didn’t press the issue any further.  “C’mon, you know you want in on it.” He teased, tempting you to take the bait. You took a few steps forward so you could glance out of the serving window, the all too familiar head of curls sitting right where you expected them to be. You fought off a smile, turning back to face the three of them who stared at you, almost holding their breath to see if you would play along or not. 
You brought your tongue out to wet your lips, allowing a smirk to spread over your face as you leaned forward as if you were letting them in on a big secret. “I bet he doesn’t even tell me hi first.”
“There she is!” Nick cheered, raising his fist up in celebration. 
“And if I’m right, you fuckers all owe me ten.” You countered, glancing at all three of them who nodded in agreement.
“Deal.” Nick spoke with a sharp nod, bringing his hand down to shake with your own to finalize the deal before tilting his head in the direction of where the subject of the bet was sitting. “Now go out there and make us proud.”
You rolled your eyes through a scoff, shaking your head as you turned on your heels to make your way over to the kitchen door - stopping in front of it to look over at the three of them before bringing your hand up to the clip in your hair and removing it from your head, allowing your hair to fall down your back, smiling to yourself as they all groaned - murmurs of “she’s cheating” and “that’s not fair” whispered as you shot them a wink before pushing open the door and stepping back out into the diner. The three of them leaned against the metal of the hatch, watching your every move, waiting to see who would win. 
Your white converse carried you across the black and white checkered floor of the diner over to the all too familiar booth, a path that you could probably do with your eyes closed at this point. You pulled the skirt of your uniform up a little higher on your hips before standing in front of the booth, feeling all too powerful as you watched the man who was already staring at your exposed legs. You fought back a smile, knowing you already had him in the palm of your hand. 
You watched the way his dark eyes trailed up your body, a flirtatious smile fighting his lips as he leaned back, throwing a leather covered arm over the back of the red booth - finally locking eyes with you. With the way he was looking at you, you knew you were about to be thirty dollars richer before he even opened his mouth. “Well, there’s my favorite girl. Don’t you look extra pretty today.”
You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth to stop from laughing as you could hear Ruth, Nick and Ricky all groaning and cursing in disappointment of losing. You brought one of your hands behind your back to rub your fingers together in a way to tell them they owed you money, flipping them off quickly before focusing your attention fully on the boy who had quickly become your favorite customer.  “Hi Matty.”
It had been five weeks since Matty had come in for the first time. You found it ironic, that the first night that you had met him you assumed you’d never see him again only to develop a routine with the boy. Every single Wednesday at 6 pm, Matty would stroll into The City Diner in his leather jacket, slip into the same booth, order the same exact meal and flirt with you until you were so red in the face that you had to walk away from him. 
It was dizzying how persistent he was when it came to you, never letting the many, multiple rejections stop him from showing up the following week and trying again - maybe it had something to do with you drawing the tiniest of hearts next to have a nice day! on his receipt, or maybe it was the way you’d sometimes slip into the booth across from him to chat when the diner was extra slow, which happened more often than not considering he came on the slowest day of the week. Or maybe, just maybe, it was the fact that you have never truly rejected him. Always smart with your choice of words and choosing to just walk away with a blush instead of turning the man down, knowing deep down that if you gave him what he really wanted that there would be no reason for him to ever return to the diner and you simply couldn't have that. You had grown accustomed to your little routine and you weren’t quite ready to give him up yet. 
“Hi pretty girl.” Matty smiles, staring at you with dark eyes that gleamed at you like you hung the moon. “How’s your day going?”
“Oh, you know.” You sighed dramatically, trying not to make it obvious how excited you were to see him. You figured since you were on your sixth time doing this that you wouldn’t be as giddy to see him, but you found yourself more and more so with each time that he walked through the front door - surprised that he was still showing up despite the fact that you still hadn’t given him your phone number like you had promised to before. “Same old shit, had a woman bitch at me for putting bacon on the burger that she ordered.”
Matty nodded along with slightly furrowed brows. “Well, why would you put bacon on her burger if she didn’t order it?” 
You know Matty didn’t mean it the way he said it, but the way he worded the question had your blood beginning to boil all over again, you took a deep breath before pointing out a vital part of the story. “Oh, I don't know, maybe because she ordered a bacon cheeseburger.”
Matty’s head hit the back of the booth in a loud laugh that bounced off the walls of the diner and reverberated inside your mind, making you feel warm inside, it had quickly become one of your favorite sounds. “No fucking way.”
“Yes.” You laughed softly alongside him. “I wish I was joking.”
“Is she still here?” Matty glanced around the restaurant when you nodded in response, only having to look at a few tables before making his guess. “Was it that girl?”
You glanced over your shoulder, another stream of giggles falling from your lips at the fact that Matty was able to immediately clock her. “How did you know?”
“Oh, the haircut.” Matty replied quick and simple, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Come on now.”
“Yeah, so that’s how my day is going.” You shook your head through a laugh. “What about yours?”
That flirtatious smile was back on his face in the blink of an eye. “Much better now that I’m with you, darling.”
“Oh, please.” You groaned through a roll of your eyes. “That was cheesy, even for you.”
“Hey, it’s hard to be creative after so many weeks.” Matty defended with his hands up, crossing his arms over his chest and giving you a quick once over. “If you’d stop being so stubborn and just give me your number.” He drew out the word with dramatic flair. “Then I wouldn't have to resort to cheesy lines. It’s a win-win scenario. Truly. You don’t have to hear pickup lines anymore and I finally get to take you out on the date I’ve been itching to bring you on for weeks now.”
You bite the inside of your cheek to fight off the smile that you feared might break your face in half, heat climbing up your neck and up to your cheeks. “Even prettier when you’re blushing, darling.”
You laughed breathily through your nose, bringing your finger to brush against the tip of your nose in an effort to hide your face, hopeful to find some footing to gain some type of control back in this conversation. “You know flirting doesn’t get you a discount, right?”
Matty brought a hand down over his heart, staring at you with faux offense that already had you rolling your eyes into the back of your skull. “Oh, I’m not flirting with you to get money off.” Emphasizing the word with a playful glint in his eyes, dark eyes that dragged slowly down the expanse of your body while his eyebrows raised the closer to your bare legs he got, speaking through a smug smirk. “Your clothes, however.”
“Alright.” You deadpan, shaking your head. “And with that, I’m gonna go put your order in.”
“Oh, come on.” Matty pleads through a soft laugh, clearly quite proud of himself for the joke that had heat simmering faintly in your stomach. “What’s it take to get your number?”
You sigh deeply, one that Matty knew was teasing, fixing him with a look that you hoped was full of annoyance but you knew was filled with everything but. This was a common occurrence, Matty asked for your number at least twice every week he came in here, persistent as hell with no sign of stopping. You considered just giving it to him, or just finally fully giving into him all together and jumping his bones like you’ve been wanting to for six weeks now. But playing hard to get was so much more fun. “Okay, I have a proposal for you.”
“Little soon to pop the question, don’t you think, darling?” Matty teased. “I don’t even have your number yet and you’re already trying to tie me down.”
You fix him with a look that has him holding his hands up in defense. “I’m sorry, go ahead.”
You snort, shaking your head. “Today’s the first of the month, right?” Matty nods. “Okay, why don’t we make a deal?”
“I’m listening.”
“If you’re nice and sweet, if you prove that you deserve it.” Matty shifts in the booth. “I’ll give you one digit of my phone number each month.” 
Matty nods slowly, pursing his lips as he stares off, deep in thought. “Alright, I can work with that.” Bringing his dark eyes back up to lock with yours. “I’ll take what I can get.” You giggle. “What’s my number, then?”
“Oh, you can’t have it yet.” You stare at him in bewilderment, his eyes narrowing slightly. “You just got here, you have to be nice and sweet to me first and then I’ll give you what you want.”
Matty’s eyebrows raise, a smirk plastered on his face. “Oh, I’ll show you nice and sweet, alright.” You tsk, Matty huffs and rolls his dark eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “Fine.”
You smile. “Same order as always?” You knew it never changed, but wanted to confirm just in case. 
“Do you even need to ask at this point?” Matty asks with a tilt of his head.
“Alright, I’ll go put it in for you.” You nod, starting to turn on your heels.
“Okay, I’ll just be sitting here.” Matty sighed, dramatic as ever, clasping his hands together and tapping his fingers against the backs of them. “Being as sweet and nice as I can possibly be.”
You snort, shaking your head with a roll of your eyes, turning the rest of the way so you could walk away. “You’re so annoying.”
Matty’s order didn’t take long to come out, only having to wait less than ten minutes before you were sliding the plate of food in front of him, sitting the chocolate milkshake alongside it and reaching into your apron to grab him a straw and accidentally setting down two. Matty was quick to raise a brow at you with a smirk. “You trying to share my milkshake, darling?” You were quick to shake your head no, snatching up the extra straw before he got any ideas. “You can have it, actually.” Matty spoke with certainty, leaning back in the booth to give your body a quick scan. “Got something else in mind that I’d rather drink.”
You couldn’t stop your mouth from dropping in astonishment, sometimes you truly could not believe some of the stuff that came out of his mouth. “You are ridiculous.” You scoff. “And you were doing so well too.”
Matty shrugs, picking up a fry off of his plate and dipping it in his chocolate milkshake, sticking his tongue out in a way that was unnecessary for eating a french fry, astounded that he could make something so innocent seem so pornographic.
“Can you really blame me?” His dark eyes glued to your legs that were on display. “I mean, you’re the one who hiked your skirt up before you walked over here to greet me.”
You found your mouth dropping open in astonishment for the second time in such a short span of time, quick to close it and clear your throat, a deep blush deepening on your cheeks for being called out - embarrassed that Matty had caught you in the act. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Right.” Matty nodded, eyes dragging up the length of your legs painfully slow, spending an extra beat where the hem of the skirt of your uniform met the middle of your thighs. The smirk on his face grew as you shifted under his gaze, his dark eyes shooting up to meet your own. “Do I get my reward now?”
You hummed, tapping your pointer finger against your chin as if you were deep in thought, Matty watched you with gleaming eyes that narrowed from your antics. “Do you think you deserve it?”
Matty hummed, swallowing and leaning forward in the booth, arms folded against the table as he leaned in to speak low and deep, a dangerous look in those deep, dark eyes of his. “One of these days, I’m going to make you eat those words.”
You swallowed thickly, a low heat simmering in your stomach from his promise. You stared at one another for a few beats of your pounding heart, the rate of it picking up impossibly quicker when dark chocolate eyes flicked down to your lips, your tongue felt as though it was made of sandpaper. 
You cleared your throat in hopes of taking some of the tension with it, sliding Matty’s receipt across the table to him, never wavering eye contact with him as you did so. His dark eyes only breaking from your own when you tilted your head down ever so slightly in reference to the receipt. Matty picked up the small, thin piece of paper between his rather large, veiny hands - the sight of them on full display had your tongue feeling much more like the desert, watching the way one of the veins jumped as he ran his finger absentmindedly along the back of the receipt. Or maybe he was doing it on purpose, if he had noticed the way you hiked your skirt up so it’d be shorter before standing before him, you were sure that he had to have known about your obsession with his hands. 
Matty read over the receipt, smiling softly at the familiar etching of your handwriting across the top of it, have a nice day!<3 - the ink still fresh. 
He glanced at you over the top of the receipt, his eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly, confused as to why you wanted him to look at the piece of paper right now. You widen your eyes slightly, nodding your head back down at the receipt so he would look at it again. The furrow in Matty’s thick eyebrows deepened as he looked back down at the receipt, dark eyes scanning over the paper. You knew he spotted it when the wrinkle between his brows softened, an easy, happy smile taking over his face. 
At the bottom right corner of the receipt, you had written a small 8 - the very first digit of your phone number. 
Matty raised a fist in the air out of celebration, shaking it with a big smile on his face, causing you to break out into a fit of laughter. “Finally.”
You shook your head at his antics. “You’re ridiculous.”
“So are you if you think I’m just taking this one number.” Matty slid the receipt back over to you, tapping a finger against the spot next to the eight. “We’re on week six, you owe me for last month.”
“You cannot be serious.” You scoffed, eyes glued to his long finger that rested against the receipt. “That was not part of the deal.”
Matty shrugged, leaning back in the booth and folding his arms behind his head, the sight alone had you refraining from crawling under the booth and taking him into your mouth until he - 
You cleared your throat once more, heat simmering in your stomach as the action had caused Matty’s shirt underneath his leather jacket to rise ever so slightly, enough to reveal some colored ink peeking outside of the waistband of his black jeans. You knew you were staring, but you couldn’t even find it in yourself to be ashamed, not even when you could feel Matty smirking at you - having caught you gawking at the sight of revealed skin and taking it a step further by waiting until your eyes eventually met his own just for him to look down at his lap pointedly, locking eyes with you again and raising a brow.  
As hard as you tried, you couldn’t stop your eyes from flicking down to his lap as he wanted you to, his legs spreading further apart now that your attention was on them, almost like an invitation. You cleared your throat again, surprised that you could even still do so with how dry it was, looking away from him before you actually ended up crawling under the booth this time. 
You dug in your apron for your pen, avoiding eye contact as you leaned down to write a second digit next to the first one, Matty’s gaze burned against exposed skin as you did so. You stood back up straight with a tight smile, pushing the receipt back over to him, not able to take your hand away fast enough before he was grabbing it from you, fingers brushing against your own - having contact with his skin had heat swirling in your stomach now.
You pulled your hand away in favor of wrapping your arms around yourself, needing to hurry up and put some distance between the two of you, hard to breathe with the thick tension in the air. Matty shot you a knowing smirk that had you tightening your arms around yourself, hating that he had you all figured out. He looked down at the receipt to look at the second number, a 2 written next to the 8 you had previously done. 
He smiled to himself, folding up the receipt and pulling out his wallet so he could slide it into one of the card holders for safe keeping, the sight had your cheeks stained pink. “Thank you, darling.”
You nodded, not sure if you even had a voice to speak after the show he just put on, but desperate to find one with the way he was staring at you expectantly. “Think you can wait that long?” Your voice was meek, barely there, but it was something.
“Can you?” Matty teased, deepening the light pink stain on your cheeks to a deeper rose color. The sight of it gave Matty all the confidence in the world. “I’m not worried, I’ll get you to crack before then, I promise you that.” Matty’s words shot down to your core, the heat from your stomach spreading throughout your veins and making your body warmer and warmer from his confident words. “I’m very patient.”
As the end of summer turned into fall, the months piled on and with each passing week you found yourself in deeper and deeper with Matty, still surprised to see him still walking through the door at 6pm every Wednesday even as the seasons changed. 
You help up your end of the deal, giving him a shiny, new digit of your phone number every month, the boy always ecstatic to receive it. 
In September, Matty earned another 2 to go alongside the last one, finally having your area code and bragging that he was already a third of the way there, pulling out the receipt from his wallet and stealing your pen right out of your apron to jot down the digit so he wouldn’t forget it. 
You were stunned by his comfortability of reaching into the pocket of your apron and grabbing the ink pen, shaking your head to get yourself out of the daze it had put you in so you could tease him. “You kept that?”
Matty scoffed. “Of course I did?” Looking at you as if you had grown two heads. “This is very important.”
Matty held up to his end of the deal, trying his hardest to make you crack sooner rather than later, keeping your cheeks stained with a blush anytime he was around. 
Like now, lingering on a barstool at the front counter after his bill had already been paid, watching your every move until you decided to finally give him the attention he so desperately craved. 
“Is there a reason you haven’t gone home?” You huffed, leaning on folded arms on the counter that separated the two of you, narrowing your eyes. 
“Well, you’re always saying how you’re so busy working up here and that’s the reason you can’t go on a date with me, so I figured I’d wait for you. Maybe we could leave at the same time.” Matty shrugged, smiling easy. “Do you?”
“Do I what?” You questioned, eyes puzzled and heart pounding.
“Do you wanna leave at the same time?”  
You swallowed down the butterflies that threatened to start to swarm at the question, couldn't help but imagine what everyone would think if they saw the two of you leave together. Almost like he had read your mind, Matty extended his offer. “I leave first and you can wait five minutes so it’s not suspicious.” 
Matty could feel you considering it, leaning in closer and capitalizing on your silence. “I don’t live too far from here, could have you falling apart underneath me in half an hour.”
It was tempting, very tempting. So tempting that an agreement was on your tongue, seconds away from being spoken but the sound of the bell and a shout of “Order up!” had broken you from your daze - Matty’s shoulders dropping in disappointment.
In October, you gave Matty a 9, his fourth digit. 
Halloween falls on a Wednesday and you weren’t expecting to see him at all, assuming he’d had some party to go to, surprised to see him stroll into the diner dressed as Patrick Bateman - blood and all. Swinging an ax over his shoulder as he slid into his normal booth. 
“I didn’t think I’d see you today.” You said it because it was true, drinking in the sight of his costume, wondering what it would feel like to pull on his tie and lick the fake blood off of his face. 
“It’s a Wednesday, why wouldn’t you?” 
“It’s Halloween.” You gestured to the costume he was wearing. “Don’t you have some hot party to go to?”
“I do.” Matty shrugs, making your blood simmer with jealousy at the thought of who he might meet tonight, the feeling subsiding when Matty winked. “But I had a hot date with my favorite waitress I couldn’t miss out on first.” 
You rolled your eyes to combat the pink that stained your cheeks. 
Maybe it was the way the navy blue pinstripe suit clung to his body, or the way the red splattered along his face seemed to accentuate his features, maybe it was the ax splattered in the same shade of red sitting next to him - whatever it was, you found the confidence to say, “I thought I was your favorite girl.”
Matty hummed, running his dark eyes along your body unashamed and easy, following the curve of it with practiced ease. “And here I thought girls were supposed to dress slutty on Halloween. Where’s the effort, darling?” Matty’s eyes had settled on the cat ears sitting on top of your head. “Saving the lingerie for me?”
You snorted, rolling your eyes, anything to distract from the idea of showing off a pretty, lacy lingerie set for Matty just so he could peel it off of you. “Yeah, sure.”
Matty hummed once more. “What time do you get off?” Not even waiting for an answer. “You could come with me, could be my Evelyn.”
You nodded. “You mean Patrick’s fiancé?” 
“Indeed.” Matty replied, smirking.
You hummed, tilting your head to the side. “You mean the one he dumps? In a restaurant?” Matty brings bloody fingers around to scratch the back of his neck. “You trying to tell me something, Healy?” 
Matty laughs softly, recovering easy. “Well, you see, you’d actually have to go out with me before I could ever dump you.”
“Hm, that’s quite a predicament.” You pouted. “As far as Evelyn goes,” Shrugging. “I guess I’m not your girl.”
“I’m afraid not.” Matty agrees, giving you a quick once over before smirking. “But you are my favorite girl.”
Your eyes roll, deflecting from the way his words made you blush. “I’m sure you say that to all your victims.”
Matty brings a hand over his chest in faux offense, laughing the dig off easily. “You really should come with me though.” Matty stresses, dark eyes pleading. “I could cover you in fake blood, you could be my next victim.” Matty teased the word right back at you, causing your eyes to roll once more. “I could sneak you upstairs and give you a screaming good time.”
You cursed the way your stomach rolled with heat at the innuendos that spilled easily from his mouth, amazed that he could think so quickly on his feet. “Tempting.”
And it was. It always was. 
You weren’t quite sure if you were debating on going to the party with the promise of Matty taking you upstairs and having his way with you or with the need to cling to his arm so no other woman would think they stood a chance. 
But as always, you found yourself shaking your head no, Matty sighed out of disappointment - truly thinking he had you this time.
“I hope you have fun at your party though.” You smile softly, to which Matty claims that it won’t be as fun without you, making your smile widen and giving you the confidence to say, “Don’t go out searching for victims tonight.”
The comment was sly enough to be read as a joke about the character he was dressed up as, it didn’t have to mean anything deeper. But the way that Matty’s eyes gleamed up at you as he smiled told you that he understood exactly what you meant.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
In November, you gave Matty another 9, the fifth digit twinning with the one before - halfway to having your full phone number that he so desperately craved. 
“822-99” Matty spoke the digits he knew, not even needing to look at the faded receipt that he had been keeping track of them on, knowing the numbers off the top of his head by heart. “I’m halfway home, darling. Soon enough, I’ll be able to guess the rest of the way.”
By the time December rolled around, you were absolutely, completely, utterly fed up with your boss. 
You were so angry that you felt as though your head was on the brink of exploding, biting your tongue as hard as ever as you turned to walk away from your boss, Tony, before you said something to him that would cost you your job. 
A family of four with a rather large bill had slipped out the front door while you were in the kitchen grabbing food for another table, leaving the bill unpaid and the responsibility for it on your shoulders - according to Tony. 
“That’s not fair!” You argued with your boss, willing tears to not swell in your eyes as the anger boiled inside of you, you always hated that you cried when you got angry. You refused to let your boss see them fall. “It’s not like I told them to get up and leave! Why should I be punished for it?”
Tony shrugged. “You should have been paying better attention, I don’t know what to tell you. Someone has to pay for it, you were their waitress so I think it should be you.”
The interaction played on a loop in your mind, fueling the fire inside of you as you walked across the black and white checkered floor of the diner, jaw clenched and eyes brimmed with hot, angry tears - not even thinking about what you were doing when you tossed yourself down in a familiar, occupied red leather booth with a huff and your arms crossed over your chest. 
Matty stared at you with dark eyes that were slightly more wide than normal, startled to see you sitting across from him for once. The faintest rise of a smirk spreading across his lips as he leaned back against the leather of the booth, crossing his arms over his chest, mirroring you - giving you a shameless once over before speaking. “You look like you need a cigarette.”
You sighed, uncrossing your arms from your chest in favor of leaning your elbows on the table and resting your face in your hands. Matty could see how tense your shoulders were from across the booth, the smirk on his face dropping and replaced with a look of concern, uncrossing his own arms from his chest and leaning forward to reach across the table - hesitating before brushing his fingers across one of your elbows. 
“Hey, you okay?” You huffed, spreading your fingers over your eyes so you could look at the boy across from you, the concern on his face growing now that he could see your red brimmed eyes - still fighting for your life to not let any of them fall. Matty narrowed his eyes. “What happened? Who’s ass do I have to kick?”
You couldn’t stop the soft laugh that tumbled from your lips, grateful for the way he seemed to ease the tension in your shoulders so effortlessly. “I’m serious!” Matty spoke through a soft laugh of his own, tilting his head to the side when it died down and looking at you more seriously now. “What's wrong?”
“Just-“ You cut yourself off with a deep sigh pulled from your toes, huffing the air out of your nose and shaking your head softly. “Fucking Tony, it’s always fucking Tony. I can't take it anymore.”
“That’s your boss, yeah?” Matty’s face drew up in disgust when you nodded in confirmation. “Of course his name is Tony, stupid name.” You couldn’t help but giggle at the way Matty already hated the man despite not even knowing what happened, already taking your side in the situation. “What did he do?”
You rehashed the entire situation sitting in the booth across from Matty, feeling more relieved now that you were able to talk about it instead of keeping it bottled in. And the way Matty threw in little jabs and jokes at your boss’s expense had you laughing so much that you almost forgot you were even mad in the first place. 
“Matty, shut up, he’s gonna hear you.” You scolded through shaking shoulders, covering your mouth to try and conceal the laughter that was pouring out of you at the curly haired boy's roast session he was having with your boss. 
“I hope he fucking does, he’s a dick.” Matty scoffed, glancing around the diner and glaring at Tony who was standing in the corner taking an order over the phone, unaware of the fire Matty was shooting at him with his dark eyes. “That’s not fair to make you pay for their meal just because they walked out, he should have to pay for it. It’s his fucking diner.”
“Yeah, you’d think.” You sighed, shoulders dropped as you leaned your chin against the palm of your hand, not even thinking about what you were doing as you reached out to take a french fry off of Matty’s forgotten plate - popping it in your mouth and only realizing what you had done when Matty stared at you with a soft smile. You blushed to your roots out of embarrassment, the fry felt like sand going down your throat as you swallowed it. “Sorry.”
Matty was quick to shake his head. “No, no, don’t apologize.” Reaching down to grab a french fry off of his own plate and holding it out to you, raising an eyebrow at you before pushing his plate slightly closer to you, signaling for you to take another. The flush on your face grew deeper, a sight that had the smile on Matty’s face growing wider. You rolled your eyes playfully before grabbing another french fry off of his plate, cheersing your fry against his own with a smile you could no longer fight before bringing it up to your mouth in sync.
The two of you stared at one another until you couldn’t take it anymore, rolling your eyes softly with a shake of your head, cheeks red as ever as grew a sudden interest in the table in front of you, only looking back up at him when he cleared his throat, bringing the conversation back to where it began. “I would be happy to spare a cigarette if you need.” Matty offered, taking another fry off of his plate. “I have a pack in my back pocket.”
You sighed, almost feeling ashamed to admit. “I don’t smoke.” The faint rumble in your stomach had you feeling bold enough to take another fry from his plate, trying to hide away a smile when Matty tried to subtly scoot the plate closer to you once more. “Sadly.”
“Well, maybe you should pick up the habit.” Matty teased, glancing over at Tony once more with a scowl. “Cigarettes always make me feel more at ease.”
You snorted. “That’s a terrible habit to have.” Matty rolled his dark eyes dramatically, smiling softly at you. “Why can’t you just be normal and eat ice cream to cheer yourself up?”
You were only teasing, but Matty was quick to take the bait. “Okay, let me buy you a milkshake then.”
You tried to ignore the fluttering in your stomach, blaming it on the fact that the few fries you’ve eaten off of Matty’s plate were all that was in your stomach right now and not the fact that the gesture had you fighting off yet another blush.
You tried to deflect, shaking your head softly. “You don’t have to do that.” Folding your arms down on the table and shrugging. “I get them for free.”
Matty rolled his dark eyes. “Well, let me buy it for you anyway.”
He was already waving down Ruth before you had the chance to decline, swallowing thickly when he caught her attention. You could see the confusion on her face at the sight of Matty waving her down and not you from across the restaurant, the furrow of her brows deepening when she noticed you were sitting across from him. 
“What kind do you want?” The sound of Matty’s voice pulled your attention away from Ruth, locking eyes with the boy across from you who was holding his hand up to stop you from telling him. “Wait, I know.”
You tilted your head at him, flushing when he shot you a quick wink before turning his attention to Ruth who was now standing next to the booth you both were sitting in, you could feel her eyes burning into the side of your face yet ignored it like the plague. “Sorry, I wasn’t aware that I needed to be checking in on you.” You crossed your arms back over your chest at the way Ruth targeted her words at you. “I thought you belonged to another waitress.”
And oh, did you like the sound of that - Matty belonging to you.
“She’s taking her fifteen.” Matty answered for you with a sickly sweet smile, you fought off one of your own as you finally decided to glance up at your friend who was already staring down at you. 
When the two of you made eye contact, her eyes widened ever since slightly to convey ‘What the hell is going on?’ to which you replied with a small shrug to silently respond, ‘I have no idea.’
Ruth shook her head softly, putting a bright smile on and finally looking at Matty, you found your eyes doing the same. “What can I do for you?”
“Oh, I just need to add another milkshake to my order, if that’s alright?” Your heart hammered in your chest as Matty ordered for you, you could already hear the interrogation you’d be having with Ruth in the back corner of the kitchen as soon as you stood up from this booth. 
“Yeah, of course.” Ruth smiled, pulling out her notepad and pen to write down the addition, her foot kicking against your own softly. “What kind?”
You narrowed your eyes at the curly haired boy who’s dark eyes scanned your face with a faint smirk before responding. “Strawberry.” 
You blamed the flutters in your stomach on being hungry once more as Matty nailed the milkshake flavor all on his own. Ruth nodded her head, turning on her heels to put the order in as you narrowed your eyes further at Matty. “How did you know that?”
Matty leaned forward to rest his elbows on the table, bringing two fingers up to his temples and narrowing his eyes right back at you. You kicked him softly under the table, causing laughter to pour out of him. You quite liked the sound of that. “A magician never tells his secrets, darling.” 
You rolled your eyes, taking another french fry off of his plate and biting it with vengeance. “You think you know me so well.”
Matty nodded his head once, leaning back against the booth and throwing an arm across the top of it, fixing you with a smirk. “Well, considering I’ve seen you every single Wednesday for about six months now, I think it’s safe to say that I do.”
Six months? Had he really been coming around for that long?
Before you could challenge him, Ruth was sliding the strawberry milkshake in front of you, an action that made you blush considering Matty hadn’t explicitly ordered it for you - oh you were so in for it as soon as Ruth got you alone. Matty thanked her and soon the two of you were alone again, you sheepishly pulled the milkshake closer to yourself so you could take a sip from the bright red straw, trying to ignore Matty’s heated gaze on your lips wrapped around the plastic as you sucked the milkshake through it. 
You hummed in delight, licking the excess ice cream off of your lips before shooting Matty a smile, the boy across from you shifted in his seat with a smile that was tighter than your own. You chose to break the tension. “Really, how did you know I’d want a strawberry shake?”
Matty shrugged, taking a sip from his own chocolate milkshake to try and avoid the question, but a tap of your foot against his own under the table had him realizing you weren’t going to let it go until you had an answer. Matty sighed, holding out his finger towards you. “Okay, but you’re not allowed to laugh at me.”
You nodded in agreement, taking another sip of your milkshake and kicking your feet under the table at the excitement of seeing even a glimpse into Matty’s mind.
“I figured you’d want a strawberry milkshake because I've seen you use a strawberry flavored chapstick a few times before.” Matty admitted with pink tinted cheeks, the ice cream going down your throat suddenly giving you a brain freeze at his admission. “It was a lucky guess, thought I’d take a shot at strawberry being a flavor you enjoyed in other things as well.”
You could no longer blame the fluttering in your stomach on your hunger, really it was a piss poor excuse to begin with. You knew that wasn’t the cause of it then and you for sure knew it wasn’t the cause of it now, the butterflies swarming in your stomach spread through your veins and made you feel as though you were about to take off in flight. The fact that Matty had paid attention to, remembered a detail so small had you feeling like throwing all caution to the wind and jumping across the table and finally kissing him like you had so desperately been wanting to since the first night he strolled in here. 
But you wouldn’t, you couldn’t. You refused to fall for Matty, you knew he was just in this to prove that he could break you down. He probably wasn’t used to being rejected, so now he was determined to flirt his way into your pants. Well, it wasn’t going to work. You would allow yourself to enjoy his flirtatious jokes every Wednesday for as long as he showed up, but you would never allow yourself to catch feelings for the curly haired boy. Nope. 
“God, I’m sorry, I sound like such a creep.” Matty cringed. “Did I weird you out? I’m so sorry.”
“No.” You were quick to disagree, realizing that the silence you had met him with had definitely made him start to panic, not realizing that you were having a panic of your own inside your own head. “No, it’s not creepy.” You assured, trying to search for the right word that wouldn’t cause a butterfly from your stomach to just fly out of your mouth as you spoke it. “It’s sweet.”
The faint pink tint on Matty’s cheek darkened to a rose color as he rolled his eyes playfully, taking another sip from his chocolate milkshake. You leaned forward to take a sip of your own strawberry one to stop the smile from spreading over your face. You glanced at the clock on the wall across the diner as you sipped on your milkshake, your eyes widening at the time.
“Oh god, I need to get back to work before Tony actually fires me.” You took one last quick rushed gulp of your milkshake, wincing from the brain freeze that it caused, the sound of Matty’s laughter warmed your veins back up. “Thank you for this, really.” You smiled at him softly. “All of it. For listening to me rant, for easing my mind.” You tilted down at the milkshake before you. “For buying me this. I just-“ You paused to take a deep breath, swallowing down the butterflies that threatened to fly out of your mouth as you stared into Matty’s dark eyes. “Thanks.”
You slid out of the booth before you could be entranced by his dark orbs any longer, smoothing your hands over the skirt of your uniform as you did, not noticing how clammy your hands were until right now. “Of course, I’m happy to do it.”
You swallowed thickly, trying to stop your knees from wobbling when Matty stared up at you from his place at the booth, a sight you’ve seen more times than you could count - so why did this time feel so different? You smiled, trying your best to deflect and bring the conversation back to where it was comfortable - mindlessly, meaningless flirting. “Same time next week, yeah?”
A familiar teasing smirk fell across Matty’s lips, the familiar sight had you feeling more at ease as the two of you slipped back into your normal roles with one another. “Already planning our second date, darling?”
You snorted. “We’d actually have to have the first one for me to do that, Healy.”
You knew you had walked right into the trap as soon as you said it, but it was too late now. You were already rolling your eyes before Matty could even say, “Okay, then let’s plan our first one.” Matty’s smile was smug, like he had just won some award. “You busy Friday night?”
“I am.” You nodded tightly, smiling to match, heart pounding against your rib cage. “But you knew that.”
Matty tsked, snapping his fingers in disappointment before holding a hand over his heart dramatically. “A guy can only take so much rejection.” You couldn’t help but giggle at his antics. “We could always count this as our first date.” Matty pointed out, making your heart pound impossibly faster. “In fact, I think I will.”
You snorted, shaking your head, trying your best to not show how his words were affecting you. “Nothing about this was a date.”
Matty shrugged. “We laughed, we shared my food, I bought you a milkshake.” You watched the curly haired boy count them on his long fingers. You cursed the pink tint that creeped up your neck as he spoke. “We even played footsie under the table.” Your mouth dropped at his claim, a bright smile spreading over his face at the sight. “Sounds like a date to me, darling.” 
“We did not play footsie.” You scoffed, shaking your head in astonishment. “I kicked you, there’s a difference.”
Matty shrugged once more. “It’s all the same in the dark.”
You blushed, turning your face to the side to try and hide it and immediately locking eyes with Ruth who was watching the two of you like a hawk. You felt your stomach drop at the sight, knowing that it was time to face the music and go talk to your friend about what the fuck had just a happened - you weren’t even sure if you knew yourself. 
You smiled sweetly. “Goodbye, Matty.”
Matty’s bright smile never faltered, his dark eyes giving you one last once over before nodding his head once. “Bye, darling.”
You could feel the heat from his stare as you walked away all the way through until you were hidden behind the door of the kitchen, immediately pulled into a corner so you could spill everything to Ruth. 
You found yourself rather busy after that, running around to try and make up for lost time, thankful that Ruth had taken over for you willingly when your fifteen minute break had ended up lasting around twenty five.
When you finally found the time to make it back over to Matty’s designated booth, you were sad to see that he was already gone. You sighed as you made your way over to collect the cash that you already knew was waiting for you, frozen in place when you saw more cash than normal sitting on top of the table. You felt your eyebrows furrow as you reached down to collect it, sliding the bills between your manicured nails as you counted it up. 
Matty left his usual twenty dollar tip and then an extra forty alongside it. You could feel the confusion etched on your face as you collected his receipt off the top of the table to see if he had left a note to explain why he had left sixty dollars behind. 
Your heart felt as though it was about to burst from your rib cage as you read his sloppy yet readable handwriting along the bottom of his receipt. 
i’m sorry that table ditched on you, hope this covers their bill for you. it was a wonderful first date ;) x
p.s. fuck tony - matty 
You stared in astonishment at the words etched in front of you, clutching the cash in between your fingers tightly, the gesture overwhelming you and making the butterflies in your stomach come crashing back in full force. 
Earlier you had vowed to never fall for the curly haired boy, but now standing here and holding proof that he cared about you, you feared that you already had. 
“I believe you owe me something.” Matty was leaned back against the booth, tattooed arm thrown over the back of the red leather booth, staring up at you with gleaming eyes and a smile to match. 
“Yeah?” Shifting your weight between your feet and tilting your head to the side, trying to think of the possibility of what he was about to say. Knowing him, it could be anything. “And what would that be?”
Matty raised a brow. “You owe me my number for the month.” Reminding you that you had indeed forgotten to give him his promised digit, you couldn’t imagine how you could have forgotten, normally just as excited to give Matty the digit as he was to receive it - though you were better at hiding it than he was. Matty was quick to remind you how. “I think it must have just slipped your mind, think you were too busy giving me bedroom eyes across the table, happens to the best of us.”
Matty slipped the original receipt that started this whole exchange across the table to you, all the ink faded and discolored from the paper except for the five digits etched in your handwriting. You huff through a breathy laugh, shaking your head. “You are insufferable.” 
Yet you leaned down to write a shiny, new number next to the more dull ones, livening up the paper and causing Matty to stare at it as if it was brand new. Matty’s dark eyes focused on the three written on the receipt, mumbling to himself. “822-993. Only four more to go and then you’re all mine.”
And oh, did you like the sound of that, being all Matty’s. 
Your stomach fluttered amongst other parts of you at the idea. 
You snort to deflect from the pink tint rising on your cheeks, looking down at his plate still covered in food. “You need a to-go box?”
“Depends.” Matty leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table, dark eyes easily running along the expanse of your body with a smirk on his face. “Will you fit inside it?” Dark chocolate eyes falling in a wink. “You’re the only thing I want to take hot to go.”
The line was cheesy, but it worked. You hated that it had your stomach leaping and skin crawling, the idea of Matty taking you home and eating you for dinner, it drove you insane. 
Normally you’d turn on your heels, bidding him goodbye with a playful look in your eye, it was comfortable, normal - it was what he was expecting you to do. But you felt like rattling him for once, catch him off guard. And maybe, just maybe, you wanted to make it known that your resolve was weakening - not sure if you could wait out the last four digits, the tension already proving to be too much.
“Sorry.” You pushed your bottom lip out in a pout that his eyes immediately fell to without hesitation, bringing the tip of your tongue out the lick along the expanse of it now that his attention was already on it. “I don’t put out until the second date.”
The smirk on Matty’s face deepend, his gaze lingering on your lips for a beat more before sliding back up to lock eyes with your own. “Well, lucky for me we already had our first.”
 “What are you-” You cut yourself off to huff out a deep sigh. “That was not a date.”
Matty shrugs easily. “Whatever you say, darling.” You roll your eyes just as easy. “Come on, what’s it take to bring you home?”
You were feeling bold, blame it on the fact that he had actually taken his leather jacket off for once, black and colored ink scattered along his arms and on full display for your viewing pleasure. You batted your doe eyes.  “You’ll find out soon enough. Goodbye, Matty.”
Then you were turning on your heels with a wink of your own, leaving Matty alone in the booth with his mouth agape, eventually spreading into a smile that shined from across the diner. 
You were having a particularly long Wednesday, the minutes seemed to drag by like hours, only a few had passed by every time you checked the clock hanging on the wall of the diner. Deep down you knew that your constant attention on the clock was not due to boredom - you were counting down the minutes until the familiar head of curly hair walked through the door. 
Usually you were able to pinpoint the exact moment that Matty would step foot into the diner, never more than a minute or two past six o’ clock. You found yourself biting your lip raw as you poured a cup of coffee for an elderly man, glancing up at the clock and huffing when it displayed the time of 6:12. You turned your head over your shoulder to glance in the direction of the vacant booth that Matty should be sitting in by now, by this time he’d already be a few flirtatious comments deep with you, but it still remained empty - almost mocking you as you walked right past it to deliver the cup of coffee to the elderly man with a smile that you knew did not reach your eyes. 
You knew it was silly to be this upset over Matty being late, hell, he might not even be coming at all. But you had no reason to be. There was no law that stated that he had to share every single Wednesday night at 6pm in The City Diner with you - flirting your ear off until he had to leave, only to repeat the same cycle the next week. And the week after that. And the week after that. And the week after that. The two of you have been playing this game for seven months now so, actually, yes it almost was a law that Matty should be here by now. 
Did he finally grow tired of your rejections, had he given up on you? I mean, really, it was only a matter of time before he did. Seven months deep and all the curly headed boy had to show for it was six measly digits of your phone number, a little over halfway there. Matty more than likely had grown tired of the chase and found somebody new to play with, someone prettier and easier to break down, someone better than you. 
You felt sick at the thought, at the idea that you may never see the infectious boy ever again, kicking yourself for allowing him to infiltrate your veins in such a way that twelve fucking minutes had you on the verge of pulling your hair out. 
You found yourself back behind the counter before you could even realize how fast your feet were taking you across the checkered tile, grabbing a red frosted glass and slamming it down on the tile with a tight jaw, all but throwing the ice into the cup before holding it under the soda dispenser and glaring up at the clock as the fizzy drink filled the frosted glass up. 6:16 now. You swore you could hear the ticking of the hands on the clock even over the sound of conversations throughout the diner. Each passing second, every single tick had you gripping the cup tighter, only breaking from your daze when you felt the soda dripping onto your hands, so distracted by the hands on the clock that you let the drink overflow. You mumbled a curse, setting the cup to the side and staring down at your hands that you coated in the fizzy liquid. You huffed, wiping your hands on your apron as you searched for a stray, clean washcloth that would do the job better. 
“Hey.” You heard Ruth call out from beside you, leaning her back against the counter and crossing her arms over her chest, tilting her head in a direction you didn’t care to look at. “Who’s the girl?”
You huffed once more, you weren’t in the mood to gossip with your friend right now, not when Matty was late and your hands were growing sticky from the soda. You finally found a stray, clean washcloth to wipe the soda more efficiently from your hands with, only paying attention to Ruth when they no longer felt sticky. 
Ruth stared at you expectantly, her green eyes widening at you ever so slightly to imply that she was waiting for an answer, you sighed - shifting your weight on your feet and shaking your head softly out of annoyance. “What girl?”
You didn’t have time for this. You needed to clean up the mess you had made with the overflowing soda, you still needed to run the fizzy drink to a table who was waiting for it, Nick had just placed a hot plate that you were sure was for the booth in the back corner on the serving window and Matty still wasn’t here. You could not be bothered with whatever girl Ruth was talking about. 
Well, that was until you knew what girl Ruth was talking about. 
“The girl sitting with your boyfriend.” Ruth said with furrowed brows, her green eyes filled with confusion and desperate for answers. “I’ve never seen her around before.”
You found yourself rolling your eyes and shaking your head before you could even process what she had just said. “Matty is not my boyfr-“ You cut yourself off, finally processing what Ruth had just said. Matty was here? And he brought someone with him? A girl? “Wait, what?”
Ruth groaned, reaching out to grab the sides of your face so she could force you to look in the direction of the booth you had been sending death glares at for the past twenty minutes, blinking hard as though to make sure your eyes weren’t deceiving you. 
And sure enough, there Matty was, sitting in a leather jacket that contrasted beautifully with the red leather of the booth he was leaning back against. A sight that normally had you weak in the knees but now had you feeling as though you could burn this entire diner to the ground as you watched his curly head fall back in a loud laugh that filled the nearly vacant diner at something the girl across from him had said. The sound of his laughter normally had you feeling warm inside but as it mixed with the sound of hers your blood ran cold. 
She was - well, she was beautiful. Beautiful and perfect and amazing and you wanted her head on a platter. Her head that was full of dark, voluminous, luscious curls that fell down her back in contrast to the white shirt she was wearing. 
You pushed Ruth’s hands off of your face, staring at the two of them in bewilderment. Who was this girl? And why the fuck would Matty bring her here? 
“You have to go over there.” Ruth broke you from your daydream. 
“Are you insane?” You scoffed, not able to take your eyes off the train wreck in front of you. “You have to serve them, I can’t. I think I might throw up all over their table.”
“You have to go over there.” Ruth stressed, finally breaking your stare from Matty and the mysterious girl to stare at the brunette with pleading eyes. “Mark your territory, assert dominance, take claim of what’s yours.” 
“He doesn’t belong to me.” You argued because it was true. He didn’t. And it was all your fault. You could have had him that very first night you met him, but instead you decided to play the long game and look where it ended up. You lost your chance, he moved on and he was here to rub it in your face. 
Ruth rolled her green eyes at you, fixing you with a pointed look that had you releasing a deep sigh. She brought her manicured nails out to fix your hair, making sure you looked as perfect as could be before pushing your shoulder softly in the direction of the booth. “Go get your man.”
You huffed, rolling your own eyes while mumbling that he was not your man while you turned on your heels and made your way over to the all too familiar booth, dread seeping further and further into your veins with every step you took against the black and white checkered tile. 
Matty noticed you before you had finished making your way over to them, a smile instantly overtaking his face as he unashamedly ran his dark eyes over the expanse of your body, an action that normally had your stomach filling with butterflies but now had it swirling with nausea as you glanced over at the girl across from him just in time to catch her also giving you a quick once over. 
You swallowed the bile that threatened to creep up your throat at the sight, trying to ignore the thought that she had probably already deemed that you weren’t a threat and you couldn’t even blame her. Now that you could see her up close, you felt like a fool for ever even considering that you had a chance with the boy who was smiling up at you as you finally stopped next to their booth, not even forcing a fake smile on your face. You pulled the notepad from your apron and clicked your pen with vengeance, refraining from pulling your hair out at the idea that you hadn’t had to write Matty’s order down in months, but you needed the notepad to write down hers.
“There she is, pretty as ever.” Matty all but beamed, giving you a smile so bright and warm that you felt as though you needed to smack it right off of his face, astounded that he could be so bold to find it in himself to still flirt with you despite the fact that he had a girl sitting across from him. 
You didn’t even crack a smile, jaw ticking as you glared into his dark eyes that had steadily been growing with a mix of confusion and concern, his smile faltering and eyebrows slightly scrunching together at the energy that exuded from you - creating a thick tension in the air between the two of you. 
You counted to ten in your head, trying to calm yourself down before your head actually exploded.
“You’re late.” Mentally kicking yourself as you spoke without thinking, hating that you had just exposed yourself for knowing that he hadn’t shown up right at six o’ clock on the dot. Matty’s smile had upturned again, yet still hesitant considering you were still glaring at him with a look that he was thankful couldn’t kill. “Didn’t think you’d show.”
“Yeah, sorry, you can thank this one for that.” Matty laughed softly, tilting his head in the direction of the beautiful girl sitting across from him. And though you begged your eyes not to, they slid over to look at her anyway, stomach rolling with another wave of nausea as she smiled warmly at you and even gave you a soft wave. “We told her to start getting ready two hours before we had to leave and yet she didn’t listen.” Matty teased, the girl rolled her eyes and flipped him off with a smile. You were so wrapped up in watching them that you hadn’t even picked up on the fact that Matty had said we, lightheaded as you watched their interaction. “Imagine that.”
“Oh, fuck off.” The girl scoffed through a soft laugh, rolling her eyes at Matty before looking back at you with another warm smile, her brown eyes searching your face before holding out her left hand in an offer for you to take. “I’m Charli, since Matty forgot to introduce me.”
You could hear Matty scramble as you stared down at her hand, not moving a muscle. “Oh shit, sorry. It slipped my mind. This is Charli.”
You stared at her outstretched hand for a few beats of your pounding heart, eyes glued to the diamond on her finger, feeling as though your legs had been kicked out from under you. Matty was engaged? Your throat was closing in on itself, all the blood rushing to your heart to fuel the racing pace that pounded against your ribcage, tunnel vision on the diamond that sparkled under the fluorescent light of the diner.
You could feel the tension growing thicker as her hand grew tired from hanging there. You felt awful for being so blatantly rude, it wasn’t her fault, but the thought of touching her skin had the feeling of bile rising in your throat once more. 
You shifted on your feet, clearing your throat before looking back down at your notepad, resting your pen against the paper to distract yourself from watching Charli awkwardly put her hand back down. You could feel Matty’s puzzled gaze burning a hole into the side of your head, but you ignored it in favor of asking in a tight, monotone voice. “What do you want?”
You were so hyper focused on keeping your attention on the blank page before you that you jumped ever so slightly when you felt a hand graze against your shoulder, acting as warning before a man with a blonde, shaved head slipped past you and slid into the booth next to Charli - placing a kiss to the side of her head and throwing an arm over her on the back of the booth. “Sorry, I couldn’t fucking find the bathroom.” 
Oh.
You wished the ground would open up and swallow you whole, such a simple interaction that answered so many questions that had been whirling around in your mind and eased the simmering rage bubbling inside of you - replaced with embarrassment and shame for the way you had acted, you didn’t dare to look at Matty even though you could feel the burn from his stare singeing your skin. 
“So this is her, then?” Deep voice speaking across the booth to Matty, you could see his curls nodding in confirmation in your peripheral vision. Soon the man with the shaved head was turning his attention toward you, brown eyes scanning your face almost as if he was assessing you - deeming if you were worthy of his friend or not. You held your breath, white hot shame burning under your skin as you relived how you had just acted mere moments before he interrupted, feeling as though you could finally breathe when a soft smile spread over his pale face and he gave a tight nod of approval. “Hi, I’m George.” You gave him a soft smile back, the best one you could muster up while actively trying to fight against the bile climbing your throat at the thick tension between you and the man you refused to look at. 
“It’s so nice to finally meet the girl that I have heard so much about.” You could feel your cheeks heat and you weren't sure if it was from the confirmation that Matty had talked about you or out of embarrassment from before. “I mean, seriously, so much. He’s not stopped yappin’ about you since he came in for the first time.”
Now you were more sure that the pink tint on your cheeks was due to the former.
“See this?” Matty broke his silence for the first time since introducing Charli. “This is exactly the type of shit I explicitly told you not to say before we came in here.”
George and Charli laugh easily from their side of the booth, making the tension in your shoulders feel more at ease, feeling comfortable enough to laugh along softly - feeling relieved yet still not daring to glance at the boy with curly hair.
“Oh, don’t start you two.” Charli groaned through a laugh, rolling her eyes and turning her attention to you. “I’m sorry about them, they’re a handful.”
Another wave of laughter tumbled from your lips, louder this time and more carefree, at the fact that Charli sounded like she was talking about children of her own and not her fiancé and his best friend. You quickly decided that you liked his friends, especially Charli, making that hot shame burn deeper inside of you for how you had acted towards her. Opening your mouth to apologize before you could stop yourself, the guilt consuming you. 
“I’m sorry.” You swallowed thickly, giving Charli a kind smile that she returned, George looked between the two of you with deeply furrowed brows and confusion plastered on his face. “About before.” 
Charli waved you off, diamond ring flashing beautifully in the light, the sight of it not making you sick with nausea any longer. “Don’t worry about it.” She shook her head softly, giving you a kind, reassuring smile before looking at George and Matty. “I told you guys if you left me alone with Matty that she would assume we were together.” You felt the pink on your cheeks darken as she so casually called you out, glancing back over at you. “Fucking idiots, these two.”
You felt dizzy with all three of their attention now focused on you, swallowing thickly. You could feel Matty slide his foot across the floor, knocking it against your own in hopes that it would draw your eyes over to him, desperate for you to pay attention to him, to notice him. It didn’t, you couldn’t, you were far too embarrassed - only keeping your attention on George and Charli despite the insistent pressure of his foot against your own. 
“Oh, I didn’t-” You started to try and build a defense for yourself, desperate to cover up your blind jealousy, but it died in your throat when Charli fixed you with a knowing look. “Right.” You huffed, gripping the pen between your manicured fingers tighter, white knuckled as Matty’s foot ran up the side of your ankle. You clear your throat, shifting your weight between your feet and crossing the one that Matty had been messing with behind your other, hiding it away from him. “What can I get for you guys?”
You avoided the familiar booth as much as you could for the remainder of their time there, ironic considering normally you would be avoiding all your other tables just so you could linger there with Matty. So now that you were hiding out in the kitchen after dropping their food off to them, you were getting questioning stares and side eyes from your coworkers, Nick being the only one brave enough to speak up. “Is there a specific reason you’re avoiding your boyfriend?”
You groan, bringing your hands up to your face to rub it out of frustration. “He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Okay.” Nick spoke with caution and though you couldn’t see him, you knew he had his hands raised in defense. “Did something happen?”
“Oh yeah.” Ruth’s voice carried throughout the kitchen, the brunette talking through a stack of empty dishes, shooting the bus boy, Johnny a glare for doing his job for him. 
Nick stood up a little straighter, brows coming together to show that he was more concerned now. “He didn’t cross a line did he? He didn’t hurt you, right?” Not even waiting more than a second of your silence before he was cracking his knuckles. “I’ll fucking kill him.”
Nick was already on the move, making you groan again before calling out for him to stop. “He didn’t do anything.” 
Nick stopped, looking even more confused now. “Well, what happened then? What’s got you this upset?”
You sighed, hoisting yourself up on the squeaky clean counter, swinging your legs and playing with the loose hem hanging from the skirt of your uniform. “I ruined it.”
“Oh, please.” Ruth mocked, coming to lean on the counter you were sitting on. “You did not ruin it.” Turning her head over her shoulder to face Nick. “She did not ruin it, she’s just being dramatic.”
“I showed my ass out there.” You stressed, tossing your head back against the wall with a thud. “How fucking embarrassing.” 
“You got a little jealous, everyone does.” Ruth spoke softer now, handling you with more caution now that she knew how upset you were. “Didn’t he get jealous that time he came in and some dude was flirting with you already? He was fucking fuming in the booth. It’s normal to be stupid and jealous when there’s feelings involved.” Ruth explained. “It showed him that it’s not all one sided and that you like him just as much as he likes you.” Knocking her elbow against your knee and shrugging with a faint smirk. “He probably thought it was hot.”
You snorted, shaking your head softly against the wall. “He probably thinks I’m insane.”
“Maybe.” Ruth shrugs, knocking against your knee again to tease. “Maybe he’s into that.”
You laugh through a breathy nose, pulling on the loose thread of your uniform harder, tugging it out and freeing it from the black fabric that bounded it. “I just feel silly, I don’t know why I reacted that way.”
“It was valid.”
“It wasn’t.” You sighed. “We’re not dating, I see him once a week and flirt with him for an hour, he doesn’t belong to me. He can go out and do whatever he wants.” Your lips turning up into a scowl. “Whoever he wants.” 
“Yeah.” Ruth agrees, knocking your knee for a third time. “But he only wants you.”
You shook your head, causing Ruth to roll her eyes and look over at Nick for some help. “You’re a man, will you please tell her that if he was not obsessed with her that he would have stopped coming in July.”
Nick did the math in his head, counting back the months until he knew that July was only a month in, nodding his head in agreement. “I’ve never persuaded just a hookup with a girl I didn’t want to actually be with for longer than a couple of weeks.” Nick spoke truthful and honest, he was never one to sugar coat anything with anyone. “I mean, women are everywhere, if he just wanted pussy he could go out and find it easily.” You and Ruth chuckled softly at his choice of wording. “There is no fucking way he has been coming around for seven months just to get in your pants, it’s deeper than that.”
“See.” Ruth says confidently with a smile and a pointed look. “Now I’m about to tell you for the second time today.” Grabbing your hand and tugging you off of the counter and back onto your feet, fixing your hair of any stray fly aways much like she had before, turning you and giving you a quick slap on the ass that caused laughter to pour out of you. “Go out there and get your man.”
You were walking out of the kitchen before you could talk yourself out of it, holding on to the shred of confidence Nick had given you instead of the doubt and insecurities as your converse clad feet carried you across the black and white checkered floor on a path that you knew all too well.
You stared down at your feet for most of the walk, only looking up when you knew you were about to near the booth, heart dropping at the sight of Matty sitting alone and staring at you like he could eat you alive. 
Your heart felt as though it was going to beat out of your chest at the idea of having to face Matty alone, no one else for you to stare at like you had earlier to avoid eye contact with him, it was just you and him now.
Your tongue felt like sandpaper when you swallowed, a familiar thrum buzzing through your veins at the sight of his dark eyes drinking you in. You weren’t even fully standing next to the booth yet and Matty was already leaned back against the red leather with a smirk on his face that fueled the pounding of your heart. “Hi pretty girl.” 
It made you dizzy, how quickly the two of you fell back into things now that you were alone. Matty spoke the introduction through a smirk as if he was trying to show you how things could have gone if you hadn’t acted the way you did. 
You swallow thickly. “Hi Matty.” Shifting under his gaze. “Where’d your friends go?”
Matty checks you out unashamed, lingering on your exposed thighs. “Made ‘em leave.” Dragging up the expanse of your body to linger on the way your chest rose and fell as you breathed in and out deeply. “After the way you showed out?” Eyes that seemed darker than normal locked with your own in a heated gaze. “Wanted you all to myself.”
You blink, tilting your head to the side. “The way I showed out?” 
“Oh, don’t get all shy on me now, love.” Matty cooed. Love. That was new. You quite liked the sound of that. “You practically had steam rolling out of your ears when you first came over here.” He must have noticed the panic in your eyes at the mention of how you had acted, worried about what he may think, he was quick to assure you. “It was fucking hot, you getting all possessive over me.” Crossing his arms over his chest and shooting you a wolfish smile. “Though, I never thought I’d see a day where you got jealous.”
You scoff, feeling the need to defend yourself even though you knew he could see right through you, crossing your own arms over your chest and speaking firmly. “I wasn’t jealous.”
“Oh, please.” Matty drew out dramatically, rolling his eyes with a scoff. “You wanted to jump my bones right here in this booth just to show everyone in here who I belong to.”
You shifted on your feet, hating that Matty knew you so fucking well. You could admit it, tell him that you wanted nothing more than to crawl on his lap and allow him to finally have his way with you just so you could stake your claim over the boy you had fallen head over heels for. You could deny it, roll your eyes and call him crazy for ever even thinking that you would be jealous. Instead, you decided to ignore the jealousy element all together and focus on the big elephant in the room. “You don’t belong to me.”
A beat passes, full of nothing but locked eyes in a heated gaze and held breaths, waiting to see if the line you both had been tiptoeing around for seven months was finally about to be crossed or not. 
Matty blinks, staring directly into your eyes as he leaps over the line. “I could.”
Your breath hitches in your throat, heart pounding and ears ringing. You could feel something shift in the air through the thick tension between the two of you, you knew that Matty could feel it too, shifting from his place in the booth to scoot closer to where you were standing. “Let’s get out of here.”
“I-” You clear your throat in hopes that it would contain the ringing in your ears, the way that he was looking at you had heat swirling in your stomach and simmering through your veins, spreading throughout your whole body and making you feel woozy. “I should probably go check on my other tables.”
You swallow, ready to turn on your heels so you could put some space between the two of you, needing it so the air would actually reach your lungs - the tension between you blocked it from doing so. You made it one step before a warm hand was grabbing your wrist, not tight enough to hurt you but hard enough to stop you from leaving. The warmth from his hand only fueled the fire underneath your skin further, your tongue impossibly dry as you swallowed thickly, turning your body back around to face him, his hand lingered on your wrist despite the fact it had no reason to be there any longer.
“Wait.” His voice was more breathy than normal, you quite liked the sound of it, desperate to find a reason for you to stay. “You owe me a number.” 
You had completely forgotten that you still owed him a new digit of your phone number for this month, almost forgetting about the fact again when Matty’s thumb started to rub faint circles against your wrist, the feeling of it already had you feeling lightheaded. 
With the way he was looking up at you, dark eyes full of desperation and need, hand wrapped around your wrist and rubbing a thumb along the inside of it - you couldn’t help but tease him. “Do you think you deserve it?”
Matty’s eyes grew impossibly darker, hand tightening its hold on your wrist, blunt fingernails digging into the skin. You were sure he could feel your pounding pulse in your wrist, thankful he couldn’t feel the one in between your legs. He leaned in closer, voice low and gravely. “Remember what I said about making you eat those words, darling. You’re real bold now, I’d love to see how that holds up when I get you alone.”
The memory of the promise Matty had made to you months ago when you first started giving him a number for each and every month came rushing back to you, fueling the ache in your core as Matty's thumb traced a heart so faintly on your wrist that you thought you were imagining it.
You raised an eyebrow at him in response, not trusting your voice to actually speak anything. Matty narrowed his eyes before allowing a sly grin to spread over his pale face. “I’ll earn it, then.” You felt your eyebrows come together ever so slightly in confusion, not understanding what he meant by that, but he was quick to fill you in. “I’ll stay and help you close up and clean tonight.” Dark eyes flicked down to your mouth so quickly you almost missed it. “I’ll get on my hands and knees.”
You cursed your past self for ever informing him that you closed up the diner all by yourself any night that you worked. You were shaking your head before you even had time to clear your throat and find your voice, you knew exactly what he was doing. He knew that as soon as he got you alone, without the distraction of customers or tasks that you would lean on when things got a little too tense that there was no way in hell that you would be able to turn him down. It’s why you have avoided being alone with him for all these months, you knew you didn’t stand a chance.
You tried to speak, but it came out as nothing more than a squeak, clearing your throat to try again. “No, that’s okay. That’s not necessary.” Shaking your head with wide, panicked eyes. “I’ll just give it to you now.”
Matty smirked as he watched you scramble, knowing that he had you in the palm of his hand, literally - running his middle and ring finger in circles along the inside of your wrist. Almost as if he was imitating what he would do between your legs. You felt faint at the thought, so ready to just throw caution to the wind and take him right here in the booth in front of everyone.
It was a position he had put you in more times than you could count, nearly giving in to him, only to be left disappointed when you walked away from him. Matty wasn’t going to let that happen, not this time. He could feel that this was the big moment he had so desperately been waiting for for months now and he intended on capitalizing on it, desperate to get his way this time or he might implode. 
“No, really.” Matty trails off in favor of slowing the circle his two fingers were swirling around your wrist, rubbing them up and down in a straight line before pushing down on your pulse point with them. “I insist.”
The action took your breath away, hitching in your throat with a faint gasp that was like music to Matty’s ears, a wolfish grin taking over his face at the sound. You were sure he was imitating what he would do between your legs now, you throbbed at the thought, desperate to feel his hands that you had been so obsessed with for so long running all over your body, trailing down between your legs, collecting the arousal that you know had already started to pool there before sliding in - 
“You should probably go check on those tables now.” Matty winked, releasing his hold on your wrist all together. “Don’t want to keep anyone waiting.”
You nodded slowly, feet glued to their spot on the floor, scared that if you moved that you would melt away from the fire that burned beneath your skin. “Okay.”
And then you were turning on your heels, walking away from the booth on wobbly legs, desperate to catch some air down to your lungs. 
You were so fucking screwed. 
Matty lingered in his booth for the remainder of the night, busying himself with his phone or chatting up elderly women that approached him. You tried not to focus on him and instead gave all your attention to the people that passed through the diner in the remaining hours it was open, ignoring the looks from Ruth you got anytime you passed by her, you didn’t feel like explaining to her or anyone why Matty hadn’t left yet. You weren’t even quite sure if you had an answer. 
You felt more and more nervous as the time on the clock inched closer and closer to closing time, swallowing a lump in your throat when Tony tossed you the keys. “You can lock up when he leaves.”
You nodded, glancing at Matty who was drinking a chocolate milkshake you had passed him half an hour ago, drinking it ever so slowly to try and milk an excuse to stay as everyone else filtered out. 
And then the two of you were alone. 
You were quick to get to work, knowing that if you stopped moving for even half a second that Matty would be on you and you wouldn’t be able to resist. 
You were wiping down tables, back turned to the man that you could hear drying off coffee cups and stacking them neatly on the counter up front. It was nice, not being alone here so late for once, to have help. You were surprised that Matty was actually being helpful, convinced that he had just used it as a line to get you alone and while you were still positive that that was exactly what he had done, at least he was being helpful. 
You finished wiping down the table you were working on, turning your head to glance at Matty over your shoulder. Like a moth drawn to a flame, Matty’s dark eyes immediately found home against your own from across the restaurant, both of you fighting off a smile as you turned away. 
You shook your head softly as you made your way to the booth that Matty had claimed as his own all those months ago, a pink tint on your cheeks as you sprayed over the surface, bending over the table slightly so you could wipe it down - avoiding the chocolate milkshake that Matty had left behind, the glass starting to collect condensation in a ring against the table. You huffed, picking the cup up and wiping away the mess underneath it. 
You held the forgotten milkshake between manicured fingers, standing up, ready to chastise the man for not cleaning up after himself. Turning around with a complaint on your tongue but it died on the tip of it as you were immediately met with the sight of Matty standing in front of you, so close that the tips of his shoes were brushing against your own. You gripped the glass between your fingers tighter to stop yourself from dropping the milkshake to the floor from the way his sudden presence startled you. “Sorry.”
You gulp, staring up at him. When did he get so tall? You were so used to looking down at him sitting in the booth that the height difference had you craning your neck so you could face him, a wave of heat whirling through you at the smell of the cigarette break he had taken earlier still lingering on his clothes. You whisper because that’s how loud you needed to be for him to hear you. “It’s okay.”
Matty grabbed the milkshake from your hand, fingers brushing against your own and lingering for a passing beat before they were gone so he could place the milkshake down on the table behind him. You wanted to complain about how you had just cleaned that table off, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, not when he was staring down at you like he could eat you alive. 
Matty glances over your shoulder, dark eyes glimmering with warning signs as his lips raised in the faintest of smirks. “You missed a spot.”
You gulp, positive that you hadn’t. But there was this underlying need burning inside of you to be good for him, to please. You swallowed thick and hard, staring up at him for a beat before turning around and slowly bending back over the table to wipe it down again, well aware of his burning gaze that fell to the newly exposed skin as your skirt raised from the position you were in. You wiped the surface of the table slowly, allowing him to savor the sight of you bent over in front of him before standing back up and turning around to face him again.
Matty’s eyes were blown out, dark as ever, swimming in desire - a similar feeling thrumming through your veins at the sight. You could feel your resolve getting weaker and weaker with each passing second, crumbling like the ground beneath you as Matty's dark eyes pinned you to the floor. You knew this would happen, impossible to resist him if you had no distractions or excuses to leave. But you still liked to believe that you had some sort of control over the situation, knowing the only way you could keep that control was if you put some distance between the two of you. 
You cleared your throat, stepping off to the side and avoiding eye contact. The action made Matty snort. “I thought we were done pretending.”
Your voice was meek, wavering and breathy as you took another faint step backwards. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“When are you going to give it up?” Matty took a step closer to you, you took another back, could feel the red leather of the edge of the booth grazing against your back. You brought your eyebrows together, crossing your arms over your chest as Matty narrows his dark eyes filled with desire. “This act you’ve got going on where you pretend you don’t want me just as bad as I want you.” Taking another step forward that had you backing up to be flush against the edge of the booth. “I see right through you, I know you fucking want me.” Reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You’ve got nowhere to run and hide now, darling. Just admit it.”
You use what little leverage you have with his arm up to slide underneath it, slipping into the booth and backing up into it, legs drawn up to your chest as you leaned back on both hands against the leather of the booth - sitting in it sideways so you could face the man who was staring down at you like he had you exactly where he wanted you. 
Matty took a step forward, his knees hitting the side of the booth you were sitting in, you couldn’t stop your eyes from trailing down the expanse of his body like he always did so unashamed with your own. Your tongue growing drier the further down his torso you got, gulping when your eyes landed on the bulge against the denim, eye level. If you were to scoot closer you could easily undo the button of his jeans and take him out so you could wrap your lips around - 
Matty placed one of his veiny hands against the top of the table, ready to steady himself as he raised a knee to the booth, ready to crawl into it with you. You gulped at the sight, scooting back ever so slightly as his other hand reached out to take hold of one of your calves, gently squeezing it before pulling it forward so that it was no longer bent up to your chest.
Your breath hitched in your throat as you watched him maneuver you to be exactly how he wanted you, making it so easy for him,  showing no resistance at all. Matty repeated the action with the other leg, spreading your legs out until they were no longer bent and instead straight against the booth, feet hanging off the side of it and in between his legs as you stared up at him with a pounding heart and throbbing core. 
Matty placed his knee more firmly in the booth, now that he had the room to, the denim of his jeans scratched against your ankle as he leaned forward. 
“Matty.” You warned, voice breathless and desperate. Not even bothering to scoot back, you knew you had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. 
“What, darling?” Matty’s voice was deep, gravely, spoken through a wolfish grin as he crawled into the booth with you. “I won’t bite.”
You gulped, watching him intently as he crawled over you in the cramped space of the booth, the only option to put space between the two of you was to lay back against the booth. You lowered yourself against the red leather and Matty followed, taking his hand off the table in favor of placing it down next to your head, settling above you comfortably and  staring down at you with eyes that you could deem as nothing but black as your breath mixed together in hot, breathy pants. 
Matty’s eyes flickered down to your lips, his tongue reaching out to wet his own. “Tell me you don’t want me.” His voice so deep it was barely there. “Tell me I’m wrong.”
You gulp, shifting against the booth and brushing your thigh against the bulge in his denim, Matty pulled his bottom lip between his teeth at the feeling. Matty stared down at you, allowing nothing but the sound of your breath mixing to bounce against the walls of the diner, giving you time to tell him no. When you didn’t take the bait, Matty smirked, leaning down close enough that a curl that had fallen over was brushing against your forehead. You squirmed against the booth as the silence rang in your ears, driving you insane, wishing that he would say something because you were positive that you couldn’t. 
“Tell me you want me.” Matty begged, bringing his hips down to roll against your own so faint that it did nothing to pleasure either of you, but the action still had you gasping regardless - clenching around nothing and arousal pooling in your underwear. “Right here in this booth and you can have me, darling.” Your core clenches at the nickname. “Or I can leave and we can act like this never happened.”  
You're breathless, still trying to find your voice as Matty’s eyes search your face, lingering on your lips so long that it had you squirming against the red leather of the booth again. Matty takes your silence as rejection, starting to move up, the cold air hitting your face from the lack of his own felt like a cold bucket of water crashing into you, waking you up and making you realize that Matty was about to leave and that simply would not do. 
You grab his face between your palms, pulling him back down over you, where he belongs, crashing your lips against his own in a frantic kiss that already had you feeling hazy minded. It took Matty all of two seconds to register what was happening, quick to match the heat behind your lips and taking control of the kiss, as he did with everything.
You moan into his mouth, Matty took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside, exploring you and nipping your own between his teeth before sucking your bottom lip back until he released it with a pop - only to dive right back in to kiss you with all the passion and desperation that had been building up for months and months. 
You threaded your manicured nails through his dark curls, scratching against his scalp softly as you tried your best to keep up with the bruising kiss, swallowing a groan that Matty spilled into your mouth. And oh, did you love the sound of that. 
Desperate to hear more from him, you raised your hips hoping that he would grind down on you again, Matty bites your bottom lip particularly hard at the feeling, licking over it to soothe the ache that shot down to your core.
You force Matty to swallow a whine, digging your nails through his curls and tugging on them, earning you another deep groan falling from Matty's mouth and flowing into yours. The sound had you kissing him with more fever, desperate and whining into his mouth, licking along his bottom lip before whispering against his lips. “Want you.”
Matty smiles into the kiss, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth and pulling back until it releases with a pop, this time he didn’t dive back in - instead choosing to stare down at you as he caught his breath. 
Your pants mixed together as you stared at one another, desperation dripping in the thick tension of the booth. Your fingers lingered in his curls, giving them a faint tug as you pulled your own bottom lip between your teeth, already raw and swollen from the searing kiss Matty had fixed you with. Matty’s eyes flickered down at the sight, licking his own as he stared before locking his eyes back with your own, a smug smirk starting to creep onto his face.
“Yeah? You want me, baby?” Matty’s voice so deep, full of need and desire. The new pet name had you tugging on his curls once more with a whine, nodding your head against the red leather of the booth, desperate for him to touch you. Matty’s smirk deepened at your reaction to the new nickname, leaning down to kiss you again, mumbling against your lips. “Want me to what?”
You whine, pitiful and desperate, digging your nails against his scalp and earning you a nip at your lip. Matty numbed your mind as he kissed you slow, full of tongue and shared groans.
“Tell me, baby.” You swallow his words that reverberated against your lips, Matty pulled away with a teasing, dangerous look in his eyes. “You want me to leave?”
You whine at the thought, tugging on his hair when he made a show of starting to sit up again, forcing him back down into a searing kiss. “I want to hear you say it.” Matty groans, nipping your bottom lip with his teeth. “Tell me how you want me.”
You couldn’t find the words, whining and squirming in hopes that that would be enough, only finding your voice when Matty pulled away from the kiss again. “Please.”
You hoped the plea would be enough to get his hands on you, you were desperate and aching, the throb between your thighs begging for attention. Matty hummed, tracing his thumb along your bottom lip, smearing some of the mixed spit along your chin. 
“I don’t know what you want unless you tell me, darling.” Matty coos through a smirk. You whine, knowing that he knew exactly what you wanted, he just wanted to hear you say it. “I can’t read your mind.”
You tugged him back down against your mouth, a shared groan mixing before you both swallowed your share of it, tongues exploring one another. Your brain felt like it was melting out of your eyes at the way Matty kissed you, so full of passion and desire. It took one last tug of your bottom lip between his teeth before you mumbled against his lips what he so desperately had been wanting to hear for seven months now. “Fuck me, Matty. Please.”
Matty groaned into your mouth one last time, biting your lip so rough that you feared that it might be bleeding before pulling away and scrambling off of you so fast that you didn’t have time to register that he was off of you until he was grabbing your hips and pulling you down to the edge of the booth. 
You yelp as he manhandled you from his place on his knees on the black and white checkered tile - running his large, warm, addicting hands up the expanse of your thighs. You leaned up on your elbows so you could watch him, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as he peppered a trail of kisses along the inside of your thighs, licking and grazing his teeth against the skin every so often just so he could hear you gasp. 
Matty’s long fingers slipped under the skirt of your uniform, tickling along the waistband of your underwear before hooking in the band of them. You gasp, nerves shooting through you. “You don’t have to.”
This wasn’t your first rodeo, you had been with a list of men prior to Matty and they were all the same, huffing when you asked them to go down on you - ridiculous that you even had to ask, always acting as though it was a chore. You didn’t want Matty to feel like he had to, you weren’t expecting him to, you’d take anything he’d give you.
Matty pulled back the band of your underwear far enough to release it against your skin with a harsh snap, making you hiss as he bit the inside of your thigh as the stunt wore off.
“Do you know how fucking long I’ve wanted to be between your legs?” Matty mumbles against the skin of your inner thigh, licking along a stripe of skin befire digging his teeth in as he hooked his fingers back into the waistband of your underwear. “Dreamed about it every single night for seven months.” Slowly starting to drag them down your thighs as you hold your breath in your throat. “Dreaming of how you’d taste.” Matty whispered, biting softly into your thigh once more before leaning back so he could drag your underwear down your legs the rest of the way, quick to dive back down and lick a long strip up your thigh, stopping right before where you wanted him most. “How you’d feel falling apart on my tongue.”
“Matty.” You whine as he settles between your thighs, hooking one of your legs over his shoulder and pushing the other one to open wider for him, giving him more space to make himself more at home on the floor between your legs. “Please. Need you so bad.”
Matty coos, blowing against your core and drinking in the sight of the way you trembled after. “You made me wait months for this and you can’t even wait five fucking minutes.” 
You whine, trying to pull him into you with the leg he had hooked over his shoulder, Matty pinched your hip meanly in return. Squirming against the red leather of the booth, you whine. “Matty.”
“Look at you.” Matty coos. “Haven’t even touched you properly yet and you already sound so pretty for me.”
You preen at his words, tightening your leg around his shoulder out of desperation. This time, however, Matty allows you to pull him into you - your head falling back against the red leather of the booth as his tongue falls out to lick a strip up the middle of your core. 
Matty groans against your folds, the vibrations intensifying the feeling as Matty swirled his tongue, exploring you and moaning at the taste. 
You couldn't lay still, heat already spreading through your veins so rapidly and lighting your skin on fire. You moan freely, breathy through pants as Matty swirls his tongue against your bundle of nerves. 
Matty pulls off long enough to whisper, “You taste,” Diving back in to lick a thick stripe through your folds, moaning against your cunt before pulling back enough to finish his sentence. “so fucking good.” Collecting your arousal with slow, flat strokes. Taking his time with you. “Better than I could have ever imagined.”
You preen at the compliment, a pretty pink blush taking over your cheeks as you squirm against the leather and moaning out. “More.”
Matty pulls off instead, chin wet with a pout, resting his head against your thigh as he catches his breath. “Let me take my time with you, baby.” You whine. “Been waiting for this for so fucking long. Gotta cherish it while I have you.” Matty explains, peppering wet kisses along the inside of your thigh, your arousal drying in the trail as he slowly made his way back to where you wanted him most - mumbling against your thigh. “What if I never get to have you like this ever again? Gotta make it last.”
You whine, squirming. You didn’t like the sound of that, of this being the only time, appalled that he could ever even assume that. “No.”
“No?”
“No.” You whine. “Only you.”
“Yeah?” You could feel Matty’s smile against your thigh. “Only me? I get you all to myself?” You nod, desperate and dripping against the booth, rolling your hips in hopes to find some form of friction only to be stopped by Matty’s hands holding you down. “That’s right, baby. All for me. Only ever me.”
You nod, a broken moan tumbling from your lips as Matty dives back in with a fire under his ass now, the idea of you belonging to him fueling the need to have you falling apart underneath him.
You reached down to take hold of one of his hands that held down your hips, he was quick to thread it with your own, holding onto it as he ate you out like a starved man. 
Matty moans against you, pushing the leg that wasn’t thrown over his shoulder more open so he’d have more room to work. “So pretty.” Matty mumbled against your cunt, pulling off with a kiss to your clit. “Pretty girl, pretty pussy.” He fits his lips around your clit and sucks, a broken moan ripped from your throat at the feeling, lifting your hips slightly and smearing more wetness across his chin. 
You could feel a familiar heat coiling in your stomach, shocked to feel it so soon. Gasping as his tongue slipped inside of you, nose brushing against your clit and causing your eyes to roll back into your skull. “Matty, fuck, I’m close.”
Matty doubled his efforts on you at your words, tongue fucking into you, sliding out so he could suck your bundle of nerves into his mouth, grazing his teeth against it ever so slightly and causing your hips to just. “Give it to me.” Matty mumbles against your cunt, the vibrations causing your eyes to roll back in your skull once more. “Cum for me, baby. Wanna feel you fall apart on my tongue.”
You whine, swallowing thickly as Matty doubled his efforts on your clit, tongue swiping across it in a pace that had you gripping his hand in your own in a tight squeeze that mirrored the squeeze of your thigh around his head. Matty sucked the bundle of nerves into his mouth one last time before you were crashing and burning against his tongue. 
Matty smiled against your cunt as you fell apart under him, body trembling and moaning his name like it was gospel as Matty continued to lick and suck his way through your high, only pulling off when your legs stopped convulsing in favor of laying slack and restless from the intensity of your orgasm. 
Matty didn’t let you bask in the glow for long, wiping his wet chin with the back of his hand before grabbing the leg that wasn’t thrown over his shoulder in his hand, slowly pushing it up and not stopping the journey until it was hooked over the back of the booth - his dark eyes drinking in the sight of you on full display for him, cunt still fluttering from the crash and burn it just endured.  
You were sure that he was going to stand up, get ready to fuck you, so you couldn’t help but allow your eyebrows to scrunch together when you felt him lean in and lick a slow, thick strip up your fluttering cunt.
“Matty.” You whine with a pout, so desperate to feel him inside of you. “Want you to fuck me.”
“I know, pretty baby.” Matty coos against your folds, swirling his tongue over your swollen clit before placing a soft kiss against it, pulling away and resting his head against your thigh. “You tasted so good, sounded so pretty for me, baby, I just want to do it one more time.” You whine, squirming against the red leather of the booth. “Will you let me do that, baby? Then I promise to give you what you want.” 
Matty trailed two fingers down from your hip, blunt nails scratching against your hot skin ever so slightly on their journey down between your thighs, running them through your folds to collect the wetness there before resting them against your entrance. You felt lightheaded at the feeling of his long, thick, calloused fingers teasing against your hole that clenched in anticipation - rolling your hips to try and force them inside of you. 
Matty grazes his teeth against the inside of your thigh, sticking his tongue out to lick his way back home to your cunt, swirling around your clit as he slowly pushes two of his fingers inside of you. You gasped at the stretch, holding the gasp in the back of your throat as Matty bottoms them out to his knuckles, slowly swirling a tongue against your swollen, sensitive clit as he allowed you to get used to the stretch. He waited until you were rolling your hips out of desperation for him to move before he pulled his fingers out of you just as slowly as he entered, your walls clenching from the emptiness as he pulled out, teeth grazing against your clit as he slowly pushed back in - halting once he pushed up to his knuckles. 
“Matty.” You groan, rolling your head against the booth and palming your breasts over your uniform, so much tension built up inside of you that you needed to find a way to release it. “More.”
Matty smiled against your folds, sucking your clit into his mouth and pulling back until it slipped from between his lips, locking eyes with you before dribbling spit from his mouth and onto your cunt, all over his fingers. You whine at the obscene sight before you, clenching around his unmoving fingers and rolling your hips, desperate to feel mind numbing pleasure like before.
Matty leaned back down to lick his spit mixed with your slick, tip of his perfect nose rubbing against your clit as he licked around his unmoving fingers. “Matty.” You whine, so desperate for him to move, the feeling of being so full with no reward was making you lightheaded. “Fuck me. Please.”
That seemed to be what Matty was waiting on, shifting on his knees on the floor beneath him before fucking into you in a pace that had you throwing your head back against the booth and whining through desperate gasps of air, none of it actually reaching your lungs as Matty fucked you hard and fast - the wet sounds that filled the diner were nothing but pornographic as your moans mixed together in a beautiful symphony of lust and desire. 
“Fuck.” You cry, eyes rolling back when Matty’s impossibly long fingers curled, hitting that heavenly spot inside of you that had you moaning his name like it was all you knew. 
Matty smiled against your cunt, swirling his tongue around your clit as your walls fluttered around his fingers, relishing in the sounds you were making for him - feeling drunk on pussy, your breathy moans and addictive whines. 
You rolled your hips down, grinding on his face and meeting some of his thrusts when your paces aligned just right. Matty doubled his efforts on you, could tell that you were close by the way you were clenching around him, sucking your clit between his lips and curling his fingers perfectly. You didn’t even have time to give him a verbal warning this time before you were crashing and burning, skin on fire as your body shook against the booth with the intensity of your orgasm.
Matty fucked you through your high, not as fast as he had been but still enough to prolong it, moaning against your cunt as your aftershocks rolled through you. You whined pitifully, sensitive and exhausted. 
Matty placed one last kiss to your clit before slowly pulling his fingers out of you, turning his head to suck a bruise into your inner thigh as he stretched his arm up to your mouth so you could suck his fingers coated in your slick into your mouth, you moan around his digits pornographically, swirling your tongue around them as Matty groaned against your thigh at the feeling.
Matty pulled off of your thigh when he was satisfied with the deep purple bruise that he had sucked into it, trailing open mouth kisses up the expanse of it as he made his way up from his knees. Kissing along your arms, the side of your neck, before slipping his fingers from your mouth in favor of gripping your jaw with them - your spit smearing against your chin as Matty pulled you in for a hungry kiss. 
You liked how you tasted on his tongue even better than his fingers, moaning into his mouth as he kissed you with fever, gripping your jaw tight as he pulled off to lick down the side of your neck - forcing it to the side so he could kiss up it with more room. Grazing his teeth against your pulse points and licking a thick strip up the side of it until he reached your ear lobe, pulling it between his teeth and breathing hotly into your ear before whispering. “You did so fucking good for me, pretty baby.” You whine at the praise, preening underneath him and clenching around nothing. “Such a good girl, you want me to fuck you?”
You thrashed against the red leather of the booth, clenching and pleading for him. Matty smiled down at you, undressing you from your uniform, tossing it behind him before hooking his arms around you and lifting you up, splaying you out on the table of the booth rather than the seat of it - a better angle for him considering the table was the same height as his hips. You gasped at the cold feeling of the table against your naked back, writhing against the table as Matty trailed his calloused fingers along your thighs, splaying his hand out on it and spreading your legs wider for him. 
“You ready for me, baby?” He dragged two of his fingers through the wetness of your folds, your body jolted at the feeling, so sensitive from already having two orgasms. Matty smiled down at you, condescending and powerful. “Think you can handle it?”
“Yes.” You whined, so desperate for it. Watching Matty undo his jeans through half lidded eyes, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as you watched his skilled fingers slide down the zipper of the denim, dragging his hand into his boxers to take hold of himself but not revealing it to you. Putting on a show as he tipped his head back in a groan, wetting his bottom lip with his tongue as he pulled strokes over himself inside of the black cotton. You weren’t sure whether to watch his face as he pumped himself or stare at the movement hidden behind the boxers, imagining what it might look like. “Yes, I can handle it. Matty, please. Fuck me, please.” 
You trailed off pleading, Matty smirked through it all, continuing to stroke himself beneath the band of his boxers for a few more strokes before pulling himself out of confinement. You moaned at the sight as Matty hissed from the cold air hitting him. Your eyes drank in the sight of his hand wrapped around himself, passing over the length and squeezing when he got close to the tip. 
You were panting, maybe you were drooling too, you weren’t sure - so desperate for him to fuck you that you couldn’t find it in you to care. “Matty, please.”
A smirk that could only be read as dangerous spread across Matty’s face as he took a step forward, running his tip through your folds once, the feeling already had your eyes rolling back into your skull and he hadn’t even started pushing in yet. Matty held his tip at your entrance, barely dipping into it before leaning over your body that writhed against the table, rolling your hips desperately to try to bring him deeper inside of you. Matty tsked, kissing up the expanse of your neck, digging his canine teeth into the side of it before whispering in your ear. “Do you think you deserve it?”
You whine, pitiful and desperate. Finally fulfilling his promise of making you eat those words that you had continuously teased him with time after time, cursing yourself for ever muttering the words now that he was throwing them back in your face. You writhed against the cool table, rolling your head to the side to capture his mouth in a dirty kiss that you hoped would convince him. 
Matty’s tongue rolled against your own in a numb numbing fashion, melting your brain out of your ears as he grinded down out of instinct, pushing his tip ever so slightly further inside of you but not near enough to give you the stretch that you needed. 
“Do you?” Matty mumbled against your lips, tugging on your bottom lip with his teeth, pulling it back and releasing it with a pop, staring down at you with dark eyes that held all the power in the world. “After turning me down for months, you want me to give you what you want the first time you ask for it?” Matty’s smile is condescending, leaning back so he could look down at you on display for him, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth as he ran his tip through your folds once more. “Greedy fucking girl.”
“Matty.” You whine, throbbing and aching for something, anything. Matty pulls away from you all together, taking a slight step backwards and back to start stroking himself again slowly, you whine at the loss. 
“I want to hear you beg for it.” Matty’s voice was rough, deep, commanding. “You made me beg for months, I want to hear you beg for my cock.” You whine, his words shot straight down to your core. “Beg for it because you could have had it this entire time.” You felt silly for ever rejecting him now that you knew he had a mouth like this on him. Matty reached down to grip your jaw between his thumb and middle finger, running his pointer along your bottom lip, pushing it past your lips that were a darker shade than normal from being kissed and bitten raw. You accepted the finger happily, humming around the digit as your tongue swirled. Matty groaned, tightening his hold on your jaw. “But you wanted to be stubborn, isn’t that right, darling?”
You nodded with his finger in your mouth, grazing your teeth against his digit before slurring your pleas around it. “Please, please, fuck me. I need you so bad. Please.”
Matty it was the way it all came out in a garbled mess, or maybe it was how pretty you looked with your bitten raw lips wrapped around his finger but it was probably the fact that Matty had been waiting for this moment for seven months now - pulling his bottom lip between his teeth before lining himself up and slowly pushing into you. His groan mixed together with your whine in a beautiful harmony as he bottomed out inside of you, hissing as he did so. “Fuck, so fucking tight around me. Shit.”
Your mouth was hanging open, eyebrows scrunched together as you adjusted to the stretch of him inside of you, already feeling so full and skin on fire. You clench around him, both of you falling into a groan at the feeling. “Fuck.”
Matty held a vice grip on your hip as he slowly pulled out of you, the drag against your walls mind numbing, not wasting any time to slide back into you in a pace just as slow. “You feel so fucking good wrapped around me, baby, fuck. So fucking good for me, you’re doing so good.” 
You preen under the praise, clenching your walls around him and begging him to go faster. Matty was quick to accommodate you, pulling out just as slow as he had before to just the tip before snapping his hip back into you. You rolled your head to the side at the feeling of him properly fucking you now, eyes fluttering shut from the overwhelming feeling of his hips slamming against your own - breathy moans mixed with the slapping of skin and filling the vacant diner. 
Matty’s hand found home back against your jaw, gripping it and forcing your head back straight. “Look at me.” You struggled to open your eyes, the lids fighting to close again as the pleasure bloomed behind them. “Want you to watch me make you fall apart on my cock.”
You whine, pitiful as ever, clenching around him and making his hips stutter in the process but he was quick to regain his footing. “Fuck, I dreamed of the day I’d get to have you like this, fucking purring underneath me and taking me so well. Just like you were made for me.”  His hips picked up in pace, mind numbing and overwhelming. “Would have laid you out on this table that very first night if you had let me, I wanted to. It’s all I thought about for the entire week, I didn’t sleep a wink. I knew I had to come back for more. Fuck.” Matty groaned, thrusting into you harder now. “Every time I saw you hike your little skirt up before walking over to me, I just wanted to bend you over this booth and take you in front of everyone in that diner to see.” 
You whine at the thought, wrapping your legs around his waist and tugging him in closer to you, making him fuck you with a new angle that was impossibly deeper - hitting that heavenly spot inside of you with each thrust and making your eyes roll back into your skull. “Oh my god.” 
“But they’ll never see you fall apart like I do, isn’t that right, sweetheart?” Blunt fingernails digging into your hip as he railed into you with a pace that took your breath away. “I’m the only one who gets to hear your pretty little moans.” The mention of them had him pulling one out of you. Matty leaned back to watched the way he fucked you, drunk on the sight of his dick disappearing inside of you. “The only one who gets to feel this pretty pussy throbbing around ‘em.”
A broken moan rips from your throat at his filthy words, writhing against the table with a gasp when his calloused fingers find home against your clit, rubbing tight circles against the swollen and sensitive bundle of nerves. You could already feel that familiar coil tightening inside of you, could tell Matty was getting close too by the way his hips faltered. 
“Fuck, baby.” Matty groans, fingers flying across your clit as his hips slammed into you. “I’m so fucking close.” You nodded in agreement, could feel your toes growing numb from how hard you were curling them as the pleasure bloomed through you and lit your skin on fire. “Where do you want me?”
“Inside.” You whine, clenching around him at the thought, wanting nothing more than to feel his cum dripping out of you when this was all over with. “Wanna feel you.”
“Fuck, yeah?” Matty hissed, fucking into you impossibly quicker now, causing your head to fall back in a groan. “You want me to fill you up, baby?” You nod, desperate and on the brink of tipping over the edge. “Yeah? Want me to make you all mine?” 
Fuck. You loved the sound of that, being all Matty’s. “Please.”
“Okay, pretty girl.” Matty promised, pressing harder against your clit. “Need you to cum for me first, though. Can you do that for me? I know you can, you’re such a good girl.”
Your mouth dropped open in a gasp that turned into a moan mixed whine of his name as you barreled closer and closer to your inevitable end. You could feel electricity coursing through your veins, igniting the coil that was tightening in your stomach.
“Show me how good you can be, darling.” Matty encourages you, fingers flying against your clit and snapping his hips into you at a mind numbing pace. “Cum for me, baby. Cum all over my cock, make a fucking mess.”
You couldn’t even make any sounds as your third orgasm crashed into you, the most intense one yet. Your walls clenching and fluttering around him as the dam snapped inside of you, immense, indescribable pleasure flooding under your overheated skin as Matty fucked you through your high. 
A breathy whine tumbled from Matty’s lips that he was biting raw from the feeling of you falling apart on him, overwhelmed and so close to the edge himself. You were panting, desperate to catch your breath as your aftershock rolled through you, mustering up what little energy you could find to reach your hands up so you could hold his face in your own, pulling it down to melt against your own. 
You both were rather useless in the kiss, but it didn’t matter, both of you needing to feel their lips against the other to feel more grounded, panting into each other's mouths as Matty’s hips stuttered as you licked lazy along his bottom lip. “Wanna feel you, please.” Matty groaned, nipping at your bottom lip as he slammed into you, chasing his release. “Come on, give me what I want. Cum in me, Matty.”
A broken whine ripped from Matty’s throat as his face broke out in pleasure, two more thrusts and he was spilling inside of you. “Shit - oh, fuck baby. Oh my god.”
A lazy smile spread over your face with a faint moan tumbling from your lips at the feeling of Matty filling you up. Making you his. Finally. 
Matty fell over you, fucking into you lazily as he rode out his high, whining into your ear and nibbling on the lobe until he was done crashing and burning. The two of you laid wrapped up in one another for what felt like hours, mixing breathy pants and sweat as you relished in the feeling of finally being able to do what should have been done that first night he walked in. 
Matty kissed behind your ear, starting a lazy trail along the side of your neck, across your jaw, around to your chin before eventually finding home against your mouth and melting against one another. 
You weren’t too sure how long the two of you were wrapped up in lazy tongues and hushed whispers, all you knew was it felt like a lifetime, never wanting the moment to come to an end but knowing it had to eventually. 
After a few more shared kisses and whispered compliments, Matty was slowly pulling out of you, an action you both hissed at. You whined at the empty feeling, eyes rolling back slightly at the feeling of him starting to drip out of you. You stared at Matty through half lidded eyes as he leaned back to watch the way his cum slowly dripped out of your core, mesmerized with a smirk playing on his lips. 
Matty couldn’t help but drag two of his fingers through the mess, making you whimper from the sensitivity as he collected his cum mixed with your juices on two of his fingers, staring into your eyes as he stuck his tongue out to clean his digits off - groaning at the taste with a roll of his dark eyes. 
You squirmed as you watched the obscenity unfold before you, swallowing thickly and wishing you knew what the mix of you tasted like. Almost as if he had read your mind, Matty hummed. “You wanna taste, darling?”
You nodded, desperate and whining. Matty nodded with a smirk. “Open up then.”
You were quick to open your jaw, sticking your tongue out, staring at him with doe eyes as he groaned at the sight - quick to collect more of his cum that had dripped out of you and mixed with your own leftover arousal. You expected Matty to bring his fingers up to your mouth so you could suck them clean, so you were confused when he brought them up to his own mouth, sticking his tongue out in a pornographic way to lick them clean. 
You watched him intently as he stared down at you with a shameless smirk, heat swirling in your stomach as he leaned down, gripping your jaw between his wet fingers and spitting the load into your mouth. You whined at the action, eyes rolling back in your skull as your tongue got coated in a mix of shared cum and Matty’s spit. “Swallow.” 
You didn’t hesitate, closing your mouth and swallowing it down in one go, you could feel it burning the entire way down. “Good girl.” Matty coos, tracing a finger along your bottom lip softly. “Now, let's get you all cleaned up.”
You were leaning against the side of your car, Matty towered over you with his hand on your hood, a playful, flirtatious smile playing on both of your lips - shy and high on shared feelings and emotions. “I guess I’ll see you in a week then.”
Matty’s smile deepens. “Yeah, I guess so.” Leaning in to kiss your forehead softly before capturing your lips next. You hummed against his warm mouth, feeling as though you were floating on cloud nine. “Thanks for the number, by the way. Only three more to go.”
You smiled wide with pink cheeks, recalling back to the number you had written next to the already existing ones. 822-993 and a bright new 1 making home amongst the others. “Yeah, well, you earned it.”
Matty snorts, shaking his head and laughing into your hair as he places a kiss to the side of your head. “I’ll see you around, love.”
You nodded your head, allowing him to open the door to your car for you so you could slide in, his hand lingering on the open door as you buckled yourself in. “Goodbye, Matty.”
“Bye, darling.”
You weren’t expecting to see Matty for another week, expecting to fall back easily into your regular routine with one another, so you were surprised to come out of the kitchen the following afternoon and see Matty sitting in his regular booth with his hand folded against the table, thrumming his fingers alongside the back of them as he waited patiently for you.
You felt your brows furrow together in confusion as your converse clad feet carried you across the black and white tile of the all too familiar booth, memories of the night before burned behind your eyelids the closer you got to it. “Are you confused?”
Matty must have been so deep in thought that he hadn’t even noticed your presence, jumping slightly at the sound of your voice but quickly recovering with an easy smile spreading over his face at the sight of you. “No, why?”
“Well,” You tilted your head to the side. “It's Thursday, you saw me yesterday, you couldn’t possibly want to eat another burger so soon.”
Matty’s smile quickly faded into a smirk as he looked you up and down, undressing you with his eyes - an action he had done more times than you could count, yet now he actually knew what was hidden underneath. “A burger? No.” Matty shook his head, locking eyes with you and raising a brow. “You on the other hand, I’d love to take another bite of.”
You blushed easily, unashamed to show how his words affected you after the events that unfolded the previous night. “What would you like to order then?” You spoke easy and unwavering, pulling your notepad and pen from your apron to take down his order for the first time in months, fixing the man with a look to stop the joke before it even had the opportunity to leave his mouth. “I’m not on the menu.”
Matty tsked, snapping his fingers together out of disappointment and causing a soft giggle to pour from you. “Well, I guess just get me some pancakes then if I can’t have what I really want.” Matty sighed, dramatic as ever, you shook your head as you continued to giggle. 
“You got it.” 
Thursdays were more busy than Wednesdays, meaning that you barely had time to listen to what new creative pick up lines Matty could come up with on the spot, apologizing with a sad smile when you came to deliver his check. 
“Don’t worry about it.” Matty waves it off, smiling and eyes gleaming. “Just happy to get to see my girl any chance I get.”
You blush hard and fast, dropping your head to hide your face as best as you could. His girl. You quite liked the sound of that and how easy it fell from his tongue, making you feel more confident about what you had written on the bottom of his receipt, sliding it over to him and  fighting off a smile as Matty read over it - his thick eyebrows coming together in the confused way that you expected them to.
“Is there a specific reason that you wrote 670 on the bottom of this?” Matty questioned, eyes still glued to the numbers you had etched in black ink before walking over here. “I mean, clearly there is because there's a heart next to them.” Matty spoke his thought process outloud, causing you to snort through a laugh. He looked up at you with soft but puzzled eyes. “What does this mean?”
You shrug, smiling innocently. “Oh, I don’t know.” You drew out, batting your eyelashes and rocking back and forth on your feet. “Maybe you should combine them with some other numbers you have sitting in your wallet.”
The grin that spread across Matty’s face split it in two, a pink tint overtaking his own cheeks as he stared down at the final three digits of your phone number in disbelief. “I can’t believe this is real.” Scratching the back of his head before raising it in the air in a fist, pumping it in celebration. “We fucking did it, boys!”
You thought that he was just being silly, but you were surprised and shocked to hear hooping and hollering from back in the kitchen, turning around to glance in the direction and laughing at the sight of Nick, Ricky and Ruth all watching through the serving window with cheerful smiles - quick to duck underneath it now that you were looking at them. You stayed turned around for a beat, processing the fact that sometime between all of his visits he had formed a friendship with the three of them, scheming behind your back and somehow you had no idea.  
You turned back around to face Matty, fighting off a smile with puzzled eyes as you opened your mouth to speak but couldn’t find the words, pointing behind you in the direction of the kitchen. 
“No time for questions, sweetheart. This is a very big moment for me.” Matty waved you off, already having his phone pulled out so he could create a contact for you, the sight of his excitement has the questions dying in your throat, watching him type your number in with a smile. “Wow.” Matty sighed, saving the contact to his phone and locking it, tossing it to the side and now facing you with a smirk that told you he was about to make an awful joke. “I fucked you so good last night that I got a digit for each time I made you cum.”
Your mouth dropped open in shock, eyes wide as you looked around to make sure nobody had overhead him. “We are in public.” You scolded, but the blush on your cheeks contradicted it. “This is a family establishment.”
Matty gave you a crooked smile, dark eyes running along the expanse of your frame and raising an eyebrow when he arrived back at your eyes. “Family establishment.” Matty mocks with a snort. “That didn’t stop you from taking my dic-”
“Alright.” You cut him off with wide, pointed eyes. Matty laughed easily, bringing his tongue out to lick along his bottom lip as he smiled, holding his bottom lip between his teeth. “Are you quite finished?”
“I don’t know.” Matty shrugged. “Are you? Don’t you still have a few more rounds left to go? Or am I remembering wrong?”
You huff a deep breath from your nose, forcing your mouth into a tight line, not giving him the satisfaction of the laugh that threatened to spill from you. You closed your eyes, counting to ten before reopening them, giving him an overly bright smile, ready to run and hide in the kitchen - feeling like nothing had changed, still that same flustered girl you were before as you tilted your head down at him. “Goodbye, Matty.”
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thornsnvultures · 9 months
Text
everything I want...
bucky barnes x plus size!avenger!reader
summary: being sent on a mission with bucky should be a piece of cake, but he's been acting strange around you for weeks now and you have no clue why.
cw: SMUT, fingering, oral sex (fem rec), shower sex, p in v sex (unprotected), creampie, breath play, breeding kink, pregnancy/lactation kink (very little), possessive pervy bucky (he gets a bit feral in this one), solo masturbation mention (m), steve rogers meddling being a great wingman, angst with a happy ending, 4.4k words
a/n: my entry for the lovely @nickfowlerrr 's seven deadly sins event 🖤 Lust is the sin I chose for this fic and really it was an excuse to write filth lol I really hope you enjoy it! (and a quick thanks to everyone who encouraged me to keep going, this fic wouldn't be here without you)
18+ MINORS DNI
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-----
"You'll be with Barnes for this mission. Get in, get out, no big deal. We've done this before and it doesn't look like it'll be much of a problem."
Steve smiles politely at you as he hands you the briefing folder with all the info on where you'll be going and why.
"If it's so easy why doesn't Barnes go alone?"
You regret opening your mouth as soon as the words come out, choosing to bite your lip and open the folder instead of looking at Steve's patented Look of Disapproval.
"Be ready and on the jet in two hours," Steve sighs.
"Yes, Captain."
Steve marches out of the room, always moving like a man on a mission even when he's not on one. No, this one's just you and Bucky. The man who's been avoiding you like the plague the last few weeks. Someone who you thought was at least a friendly acquaintance, a close colleague maybe.
He went from joking with you on the jet and bringing you coffee when he got one for himself from the canteen, to not even looking at you. Like even daring to lift his head when you walked by would get him booted from the team and sent back to Hydra.
You wouldn't say the two of you were close, but being a part of this team, working with these people; it was hard making friends with people who didn't understand, who didn't live on the compound. Sure there were SHIELD agents you saw here and there at the gym or around medical or the offices. But you saw Bucky damn near every day since you joined the team. And now out of the blue he was pretending like you didn't exist.
It didn't help that you had a not so teeny tiny crush on the man either.
Maybe this mission was a peace offering, Steve's way of getting the two of you to rebuild, reconnect. For the betterment of the team...or whatever. The sooner you got it done, the sooner you could get home and get away; from Bucky and from your own hurt feelings.
-----
Steve was right, the mission didn't take long at all. You were able to get in and get out with the information you needed with little to no fuss. Barnes was the perfect partner to watch your six with the way he was avoiding you and it totally didn't bother you that he hadn't said a word to you outside of what was strictly necessary. Totally.
When you got back to the hotel, Bucky got on the phone with Steve right away, still avoiding. He did need to call Steve to debrief, but he wasn't even saying much, just standing there with the phone to his ear, grunting every now and then.
Frustrated, you sat on the edge of the bed and pulled of your boots. Bucky was facing the window, looking over the city. The hotel room was modest, but modest for Tony Stark's standards was still luxurious and you wanted to take advantage of the shower that was practically the size of your bedroom back home before you guys left. You weren't waiting for Bucky to shower first.
"I'm taking a shower," you called out. Bucky made a noise but didn't turn around. His back muscles shifted against the tight black tshirt he wore when he shrugged at something Steve must've said over the phone. You couldn't hear what they were discussing but you could sense Bucky's tension from across the room. From the way he looked you'd think the mission was a failure, that he was reporting back with terrible news even though you know everything went well. Your fingers itched to rub soothing circles over his back, ease some of that tension away...
Shower, think of the shower. He doesn't deserve it.
Once you figured out which knobs controlled which of the four differently angled shower heads, you hopped in. Your clothes lay discarded on the sink as steam filled the room. It was heavenly. You'd have to ask Tony about installing a system like this in your apartment.
As you soaped up with the hotel body wash, your mind started to wander to the same person it always seemed to these days.
Part of why Bucky's sudden rejection was so painful was how much you'd grown to care about him. It felt silly, having a crush like this at your grown ass age, but that's what it was. Your stomach fluttering, your heart racing. You hoped he didn't know just how much he affected you every time he brought you coffee or talked to you or sat near you in a meeting.
Maybe that's why he's been avoiding you, maybe he caught on and...he doesn't feel the same way. Maybe he's trying to put distance between the two of you so you'd get the hint.
God, how embarrassing. You stand there with your hands on your chest, over your breaking heart, and try to hold it together instead of blabbering like a baby.
Of course he doesn't want you. He's a super soldier, practically a God. And he's been through so much. He's not the type to want a...girlfriend right now, especially someone on the team.
Suds drip from your breasts as you try to finish your shower, bending over to scrub your feet while you try not to cry. It's silly, silly and stupid. But you were hoping that even if he didn't like you that way, that you wouldn't lose a friend too.
The thought of him never speaking to you again makes a tear finally fight its way free and you choke out a sob as it falls down your cheek. You hope the pounding water is enough to mask your choking sobs but who knows. Your emotions are all over the place. You can't seem to stop crying and you're angry. Angry at Steve for putting you on this mission, angry at your tears and angry that Bucky might be totally lost to you.
-----
Bucky can smell you.
He stands by the hotel window, holding the bridge of his nose like that'll make it stop. It never does. You're always there, invading his senses. Not just your body wash or the shampoo you use, or the heavy floral stuff the hotel has stocked up in the bathroom. He's trying not to imagine you using the individually wrapped bars of soap to lather yourself up not twenty feet away from him, but just like his hand on his nose, nothing helps.
No, even under all the artificial stuff, it's you that drives his senses wild. Something encoded in your goddamn DNA that fries his brain.
It took him a while to figure out what it was that made it hard to be around you. He could ignore it at first, when you first joined the team. He was still fresh himself, finally coming back to be a do-gooder with Steve and the team after talking time to heal and scrape away what was left of Hydra's programming. There wasn't time to acknowledge the way his dick twitched every time you entered the room. It wasn't appropriate. And Steve would kick his ass for chatting up the newcomer anyway.
But as the weeks and months drew on, as he found himself getting more comfortable, more used to a routine that always seemed to revolve around you, he couldn't ignore it.
He felt like a dog in heat. Most of the time he could manage it, but there were days out of every month where he'd scramble for the nearest bathroom, broom closet, empty meeting room, anything after being with you for even five minutes so he could relieve himself. Biting his lip until he bled to keep from cursing your name as he worked his fist over his cock until there was nothing left.
It was maddening, the shift in your scent. He craved you constantly, but those times when his needs couldn't be ignored he felt out of control. Like he was a snap of your fingers away from becoming him again.
It wasn't until you left your phone unattended in the compound gym that things started to make sense.
You had been chatting on the treadmill with a SHIELD agent. Bucky pretended to be focused on his workout while he listened in to your conversation. Your agent friend was talking about her and her partner trying for a baby so you recommended a period tracker app that you had been using for a while.
"It's great! After you've been using it for a few months it can predict when you'll be ovulating for max baby making potential."
Your friend laughed at the saucy tone in your voice, Bucky nearly dropped the massive dumbell he was curling on his foot. Images of you, breasts heavy and leaking, swollen and pregnant with his child was all he could see. And fuck him, he wanted it, needed it, craved it.
So when your friend was gone and you hopped off the treadmill momentarily in search of your water bottle, leaving your phone behind, Bucky took his chance to sneak a quick look.
It was all right there. He remembers the last day he could smell you so strongly he could barely stand it. He almost got caught in the gym showers, slamming a crack into the tile wall when he came so hard his vision went black with the scent of you burned in his brain. He didn't see you for two days after that but when he did there was a coppery edge to your scent. And the app on your phone proved it.
You were ovulating. Your body was practically screaming for him, demanding that he do what he was made to do and breed your sweet cunt. His need to rut into you, to bury himself deep and pump you full of his cum over and over, no matter how long it took until it sticks, finally made sense.
Bucky already knew he cared for you, but he didn't want to scare you, overwhelm you. He wanted to do right by you, take you on dates, show you how special you are to him. But this feral need to claim you wasn't stopping any time soon either. Maybe, he thought, he should give you some space. Give whatever this feeling was done distance and it would calm down. Then...then he could tell you how he felt. He needed to clear your scent from his mind before he was trapped in a constant state of relieving himself by his own hand month after month, wasting what belonged to you in tissues and shower drains.
-----
So he stayed away, for an entire month at that, before Steve got sick of his shit excuses and put the two of you on this mission together.
"Whatever's going on with you two, you need to work it out. We're not in forth grade any more, Buck, you can't pretend a girl has cooties just cause you feel weird about liking her."
Bucky tensed as he heard her boots fall to the floor behind him.
"I don't-"
"Don't bullshit me, Bucky."
"Language," Bucky's lip quirked, almost a smile.
"I'm taking a shower," you called from the other side of the room. Bucky grunted, not trusting himself to say anything more. He could feel your eyes on him.
"Just talk to her. I know what you're gonna say, she deserves better than a jerk like you. But she doesn't deserve the cold shoulder."
Bucky shrugged, forgetting that Steve couldn't see him. He heard the bathroom door click shut and his forehead dropped against the window.
"You don't get it, Steve. She's different. I can't control myself around her. I'm hanging on by a thread here."
Steve sighs and says something else but Bucky barely hears it over the sound of running water and your clothes hitting the floor. 
"Bucky, you there?"
Shit.
"Sorry, I should...I gotta go."
"She likes you too, idiot." A part of him knew but hearing it out loud felt surreal. "I got the same senses you do. Better even," Bucky shakes his head at Steve's teasing, "I can hear her pulse pick up when she looks at you, how her breathing changes. How she sits close to you, touches you whenever she can."
Bucky shivers thinking of your hands on him, pulling him into your shower with you, letting him get close enough to touch you the way he's dying to touch you.
"And you know I can smell how wet she gets when y-"
"Watch it, Rogers," Bucky snaps with a growl in his throat.
"Then get your shit together, Barnes! She wants you too, you're not gonna scare her off."
Bucky wants to tell Steve he doesn't have any idea what he's talking about when he hears what sounds like crying coming from the bathroom. 
"Alright, if you're done playing matchmaker I gotta go."
Bucky hangs up before Steve can say another word and tosses his phone on the bed. Before he can think better of it his boots are off and he's pulling his shirt up and over his head. His heart is being torn to shreds with every sob that shudders through thin walls and he has the sinking feeling that it's all his fault.
-----
You don't hear the bathroom door open, but you feel the rush of cool air hitting your back. Before you can wipe away your tears and yell at Bucky for coming in before you were finished, he's right there. His hands grip your waist and turn you around.
"Bucky.
"Shh, I've got you."
He pulls you in, crushing you to his bare chest in a fierce hug. You don't know what's happening or why but he's here. Finally he's here and you're not gonna do a thing to stop it.
Your face is still wet with tears when he kisses you, consumes you, more like. His lips, teeth, tongue invading your mouth and begging you to open up and let him take all of you. You're shaking when he lets you go long enough to breathe, but his hands don't let you go, only wrapping around tighter and lifting you up against his broad chest when he feels your legs go weak.
It's everything you've every dreamed of, there's no way it's real. He's naked for fuck's sake. You can see his discarded jeans on the floor by the door, feel the evidence of his nudity pressing long and thick against your thigh.
His lips work down the length of your neck, down your chest, to suck a puckered, soapy nipple into his mouth. He's looking up at you with those murky blue eyes and your mind goes blank. You don't care why he chose now of all times to see you, to touch you, as long as he doesn't stop, as long as he keeps sucking and licking and biting you just like that. And you really must've hit your head because, fuck, you're already this close to coming and that's never happened before.
Your thighs press together, searching for any kind of friction, as you tug on Bucky's hair. When you pull, his eyes roll back. He groans, the noise shooting straight to your pussy.
Still holding you up with one hand, Bucky bullies your thighs apart with the other, spreading you open and on your tip toes so he can slide his fingers over your cunt. Two thick digits slip between your folds and shove into your cunt. You gasp, writhing around his fingers. It's too much, you feel so fucking full you can barely stand it. But Bucky keeps working his fingers, scissoring them, spreading them deep as he pumps them in and out. Your nails scrape against his skin, scrambling across his broad shoulders to find purchase as he brings you careening fast over the edge until you're plummeting, screaming his name as you spasm around his fingers.
He pulls his fingers away and you watch, dazed and panting as he sucks them clean. The way he moans around his fingers nearly has you coming again.
"Bucky, please," you don't know what you're asking for but you don't care. You'll gladly take anything he gives you.
"Need more," he groans, his eyes glazed. "Can I have more, angel?"
You're nodding wildly as he sits you down on the shower bench. Hot water rains down on his back and he's lifting your feet up on the bench so he can keep you spread wide open. His big hands clamp down on your thighs and it would be almost painful if you weren't distracted by the way his mouth latched onto your clit.
"Fuck! Bucky, oh my god," there wasn't any stopping your rambling, begging, pleading. It was too much, too good. Bucky's moans vibrated to your core. He feasted on you like you were his last meal, licking every drop of your juices, sucking each fold before fucking into you with his tongue.
You could think, talk, breathe. All you knew was Bucky's touch as he made you come again. Your legs shook and your back arched and it went on for what felt like forever, this mind blowing pleasure that you almost didn't feel worthy of. That he looked up at you as he cleaned you up with his tongue like you were everything to him in this moment made your eyes well up again for being so emotional.
A look of worry wrinkles Bucky's brow. 
"Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"
With a shaky hand you brushed back an errant hair from his forehead and caressed his cheek. "No, I'm fine. Sorry, I just get emotional like this before, y'know..." You didn't want say it, especially not to a guy you liked right after he ate you out. It was hard to look at him still sitting there between your legs, your face feeling hotter by the second.
"You mean before your period?"
You sputtered and tried to close your legs. No way, there's no way you're talking about your period with your dream man with your legs spread open like he's your gyno.
"Don't hide from me," Bucky growled. You watched, your jaw dropping, as he nuzzled his nose into your mound at the apex of your sex and breathed in deep, filling his lungs with your scent.
"How did you know?"
"Your phone, you left it open at the gym." Bucky doesn't stop kissing your mound, your belly. It's like he's a cat and you're the catnip. "And I can smell it on you. Your scent changes, gets...deeper somehow. Like you're calling to me."
Suddenly he's lifting you up and you quickly wrap your legs around his waist with a shout of surprise. Bucky grabs one of the giant hotel towels on his way out of the bathroom, carrying you like it's nothing. It is for him, but it's jarring. You always forget that he's not just some guy. Like the fact that his enhanced senses don't just include hearing and sight. Of fucking course he can scent you like a bloodhound.
Bucky lays out the big, fluffy towel and drops you on it, watching with hunger in his eyes as you jiggle when your body bounces on the mattress. You want to cover yourself with your arms and squeeze your legs shut, but you hear his voice in your head. 
"Don't hide from me."
Bucky crawls on top of you, his thick arms and broad shoulders blocking out the rest of the room. It's just him and you and this bed. And between you his cock pushes thick and needy against your weeping cunt. His hips twitch as he kisses you, lightly rubbing the thick vein running down his cock through your folds.
"Please, Bucky," you whine against his lips.
His forehead rests against yours briefly before he sits back on his heels. Bucky's heavy-lidded gaze is hungry, staring at the way your cream coats his cock.
"Please don't tease me, Bucky," your plea comes out shaky and unsure. "I can't take it."
Bucky caresses your cheek, tugs at your bottom lip with his thumb.
"If you let me in, I don't think I'll ever leave."
Your brows pinch, your heart hammers away in your throat. You get the feeling he doesn't just mean in the physical sense.
"I don't want you to leave."
Bucky's eyes shut and his jaw clenches and you reach for him. To take his face in your hands so you can pull him close and look into those beautiful blue eyes when he finally thrusts inside. And he lets you.
You hold him in your hands as his whole body shakes. You've never felt so full, so complete, but you need more. If only he'd move, you need him to move.
"Bucky-"
The growl that explodes from deep in Bucky's chest is the only warning you get before he pulls back, nearly all the way out, and slams back in. The force of it shoves the air from your lungs and you can scarcely catch your breath before he does it again and again, picking up pace until he's hammering into you, pounding you into the mattress. His groin grinds against your pelvis with every deep thrust, the thatch of hair there teasing your clit.
Bucky takes you by the throat, tenderly at first, saying, "Look at me. Don't look away, beautiful, keep those eyes open."
It's a struggle but those blue eyes ground you as your mind tries to float away. You don't know what sounds you're making, what you're even saying but Bucky shushes you, tells you he's got you, you're his.
"My pussy. Mine to fill up, right, beautiful? All mine."
You nod your head as best you can with his fingers on your jaw, babbling nonsense. He doesn't slow or stop, that super-soldier stamina helping him keep a brutal pace.
Bucky grabs your right thigh, turning it over so it's on top of your left and holding it there with the hand not on your throat. Your eyes roll back at the way the new position has him grinding against your inner walls. You thought you felt full before, but this is something else entirely.
Your hands fly up to Bucky's forearm, desperate for a part of him to hold on to as he looms over you, taking what belongs to him. His hand on the meat of your thigh tightens as he grunts and groans and you grip at the hand on your throat, silently begging for his gentle hold to tighten too.
His eyes soften, as he shifts his hand and squeezes. This man could end you right here, right now, with a twitch of his finger but he's looking at you like you're delicate, so fucking delicate and it doesn't make any sense. Your brain is fried, everything feels like too much and just right at the same time. Like you're meant to be here under him, full of him, taking everything he gives you.
"God, you're so beautiful."
Your legs shake under his grip and you feel yourself implode. His words ricochet around your head as you come, coating his cock, and the sheets, with your release.
Bucky's grip on your throat loosens and he collapses on top of you, capturing your lips with his, cradling his arms around you. His full weight on top of your twisted, bent body is a welcome pressure. You never want him to leave.
"Mine," he growls again. "Gotta fill you up, breed this sweet little cunt so everyone knows you're mine. I can't hold back anymore. Say it. Say you're mine."
"I'm yours, Bucky," you cry, "all yours. Only yours."
Bucky lifts your right leg up over his shoulder, spreading you wide open. He brings his thick fingers down on your messy cunt with a wet slap and you cry out, shaking as you come again.
"That's it, beautiful. Milk me fucking dry."
Bucky's hips stutter and go still and he shouts, spilling inside you, filling you to the brim.
Bucky lets your leg fall from his shoulder and collapses on top of you. Before he can suffocate you, not that you'd mind, he rolls the two of you onto your side and holds you tight to his chest. You can feel his release slipping out, oozing down your thigh. There's so much, you don't even want to think about the clean up. Not now, not when it's so much easier to think about how good it feels to be here, in his arms.
"You're mine," Bucky whispers into your hair, taking a heavy breath, filling his lungs with your scent. 
"All yours," you smile, your cheek pressing against his solid chest.
"I mean it. Not just here, not just tonight. I want to make you mine, angel."
Bucky sounds so serious it almost worries you. You turn your head where it rests on his bicep, trying to not get distracted by how big it is. Those blue eyes of his are soft but searching your face, like he needs you to understand, to know that he means it.
"I want that, Bucky. I want it so bad."
Your voice is quiet but you know he can hear you loud and clear, can hear the desperation in his voice mirrored back in yours.
His big hands roam your body, caressing your breast, your hips, like he wants to touch you everywhere all at once. You help him settle on a place by lifting your leg and curling it over his hip. You can see it on Bucky's face, how much he needs you. The way your combined scents make his nostrils flare, the tightening of his jaw. His fingers leave your hip and delve between the juncture of your thighs, a groan rumbling through his chest.
"Bucky," you pant as his fingers play in the mess he made, slipping in and out of your cunt.
He kisses your forehead, continuing to work you open once again.
"Need to have you again, angel." Bucky doesn't wait for you to respond before he's guiding himself in til you're full to bursting. "Gotta keep you stuffed full, baby."
You shudder at his words, his hands roaming your body.
"I'm yours, Bucky. All yours."
---
--
-
🖤
3K notes · View notes
rxmqnova · 4 months
Note
Hello!
How about Wanda x Reader, where yn has golden retriever energy.
Wanda and Vision broke up a few months ago, he cheated on her and she was like not believe in love anymore, until she met yn thanks to Yelena, yn is kate's older sister, and has the same energy or more than her.
The Bishop girl
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Y/N: 26 years old ——————————————————
NO ONE'S POV "Y/N Bishop, why in the world do you have just one fork? Now I know where Kate gets that from" Yelena sighs, shaking her head while carrying a pot full of mac and cheese she made.
"I'm just one person, Yelena. Besides, you kinda invited yourself over, I wasn't expecting you at all today" Y/N tells her back. The girl was just enjoying her coffee when her sister and Yelena suddenly bursted through the door of her apartment.
"Once you hear why Kate and I came, you'll be glad we did" Yelena says, sitting down at the table and opening her mouth to say more. "We-"
"You'll be so happy! I can't wait to tell you!" Kate squeals, cutting Yelena off and actually making her older sister curious.
"Can you guys just tell me what's going on already?" Y/N asks them impatiently, her leg bouncing up and down from how curious she is right now.
"The three of us are going to Tony Stark's party tonight!" Kate squeals.
"Oh my god! Really?!" This time is Y/N the one to squeal, her eyes shining.
The sisters, Y/N and Kate, have had this dream to become ones of the Avengers ever since they saw Clint and Natasha fighting for New York. Kate's role model has always been Clint and that's actually why she got into her Archery thing while Y/N's has been Natasha, so she got more into fighting. And now the younger sister is actually about to become an Avenger which is the coolest thing ever for the older sister.
"I need to get ready!" Y/N rushes to her room, immidiately opening her closet and throwing her best suits and dresses on her bed.
"We'll pick you up later!" Yelena calls from the kitchen, so Y/N calls 'okay' back and get back into choosing what to wear.
After trying on everything the girl decides for her favorite black suit as she doesn't feel like wearing dress tonight. But of course she needs to do her make-up and hair first, so that's what she does before actually dressing up. She does wear heels to her suit though and then just sits on the couch and waits until Yelena and Kate pick her up.
———
The three arrive to the party… finally, and Yelena with Kate immediately drag Y/N to where the Avengers are standing and talking.
"Guys! This is my older sister Y/N" Kate blurts out immediately on which everyone stops talking and looks at the older sister, making her nervous.
"Nice to meet you, Y/N. I'm Steve. Kate has told us a lot about you" Steve breaks the akward silence, giving Y/N a smile and stretching his hand for a handshake.
"Nice to meet you too!" The girl smiles back, shaking his hand. Y/N repeats this with most of them and they immediately include her in their conversation which finally makes the girl relax.
Her eyes land on the only present Avenger she hasn't met yet though… Wanda Maximoff. She's sitting at the bar alone, sipping her drink and she definitely looks like she needs some cheering up.
"I'll be right back, I'll just go for a drink real quick" Y/N tells her sister, earning a nod, so she heads to the bar. A simple "Hey" Is how she greets Wanda, giving her a smile as an attempt to start a conversation.
"Hi… Sorry, I'm not really in the mood for a conversation" Wanda sighs, making Y/N furrow her brows.
"Yeah. I've noticed. That's why I came here… for a drink and to cheer you up" Y/N gives the witch another smile before telling the guy behind the bar her order.
"Sorry, who are you?" Wanda asks, scanning the unknown girl with her eyes which makes Y/N shift uncomfortably a little bit.
"I'm Y/N Bishop, Kate's older sister" She introduces herself.
"Right, she speaks about you a lot. I'm Wanda" Wanda says, finally giving Y/N a small smile.
Of course Y/N knows why is Wanda sad… what happened between the famous pair… that Vision cheated on Wanda a few months ago and they broke up. Kate's been telling her older sister everything that's been happening on the compound.
That's the reason behind Wanda's not so cheerful behavior. Y/N isn't even surprised when Wanda's ex-boyfriend is currently on the dance floor with a few ladies.
"Well, it's nice to meet you, Wanda… Hey, don't you think it's too loud here? Don't you maybe wanna go for a walk or something?" Y/N asks the Avenger to try to get her away from here, so she'd stop staring at her ex-boyfriend. It might be too fast, but it's worth a try, right?
"… Okay" Wanda sighs and stands up, starting to walk away, so Y/N is quick to follow behind.
The pair ends up on a balcony with the most beautiful view on the entire city which leaves Y/N breathless. She walks closer to the edge, her mouth opened at the sight.
"Wow"
"I know, right? I always come here when I need a moment alone" Wanda confused, a smile visible on her lips.
"I like your smile, you should smile more" Y/N says on which Wanda's cheeks turn a bit red.
Wanda shakes her head, trying to get rid off the nice feeling she's currently having. Ever since Vision cheated on her, Wanda just decided that she'd never fall in love again. She truly loved him and he betrayed her.
Vision was supposed to be her soulmate, the person she'll grow old with, but he just had to do this to her. Thanks to that, the witch slowly stopped believing in love, thinking that maybe she's just destined to stay alone after what happened to her parents, then her twin brother and now to her relationship with Vision.
"You're shivering… Here, take this" Y/N smiles warmly, taking off her suit and putting it over Wanda's shoulders.
"Thank you" Wanda smiles, a blush spreading across her cheeks as she locks eyes with the Bishop girl.
The nice feeling appears again, making Wanda wonder if love really doesn't exist. Maybe it's not how she thought? Maybe it was supposed to happen like this and someone else… maybe even the girl in front of her… is the one she's supposed to spend her life with…
----------------------
I'm still confused about what golden retriever energy actually is, but I hope I'm at least close😅
Wanda Maximoff masterlist
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muddyorbsblr · 2 months
Text
would've could've should've pt1
See my full list of works here!
Part of the 500 Follower Celebration Requested by: Anonymous
Summary: A careless comment from Thor calls into question the stability of your relationship with Loki
Pairing: Loki x Reader
Word Count: 3.5k
Warnings: 18+ | mature themes; the slightest bit of steam toward the beginning; angst; Tony and Thor having a very much "bro" type attitude and not in the good way; hinting at Reader's emotional baggage; the slightest mention of human experimentation [let me know if I missed anything!]
Things to be aware of: established but private/secret relationship; Reader's baggage will be explained further in part 2
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There was something rather peaceful in the routine you and Loki had settled into when either of you came back from a mission. Decompressing the night before the debriefing care of Rogers that you took bets on how long this one would last. And whoever won would get to pick where to get takeout from on your next indoor date night.
Your last mission was particularly stressful, nearly losing a limb from triggering a booby trap while retrieving intel about potential human experimentation from a HYDRA base. The second Nat mentioned that little tidbit in passing while you were unpacking your equipment from the mission, the god left the common area, raiding the pantry for a selection of your favorite snacks, and queueing up one of your comfort movies.
The one about a woman that hit her head and found herself stranded in a romantic comedy only to realize that her best friend, the one that had been in front of her all this time, was her great love all along.
When you got to your apartment, Loki was already there with the movie ready to play on the screen, and he even went the extra step to open and plate the snacks on the coffee table in your living room for easier access. And the cherry on top of it all was that he brought over one of his sweaters for you to change into, something he'd been doing more and more ever since you mentioned how comfortable they were during one of your missions together where you'd shared a suite.
"You know, I'm pretty sure they're watching the same movie outside," you mentioned, speaking around the wafer stick you were munching on. "Nat just texted me that she has Netflix power considering how this mission got us stressed out to hell and back. Wanna just watch it outside with the rest of the guys?"
The god shook his head, pulling you closer to him. "If we join them outside, then I would be unable to do this." He tilted your chin up and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. "And this is my favorite part," he mumbled against your skin before proceeding to give you a series of kisses, increasing with passion in each one.
Suddenly whatever was happening in the movie didn't matter to you anymore, an army of butterflies fluttering near violently at your stomach as he wrapped his arm around you and maneuvered your positions until you were straddling him on the couch, your knees on either side of his hips. He kept his hand on your waist, holding you steady while his other hand buried itself in your hair before he licked into your mouth, letting out a decadent sounding moan when your tongues met.
He moved his hand to your lower back, changing your positions once again so that your back was flat on the couch, and he hovered over you and between your legs. You leaned into his touch, losing yourself in his attentions, until his hand moved upward, cupping your breast. That was when you broke the kiss.
"I'm sorry," he panted, immediately moving his hand away once he saw the frantic, panicked look in your eyes. "I got carried away--"
"No, sweetie, I'm sorry," you insisted, placing your hands on his shoulders, and pulling yourself up slightly to kiss him, trying to reassure your boyfriend he did nothing wrong. "It's just…I want to be ready, really, I do. And I know it's frustrating for you it's just that…every time we take a step  in that direction something in me starts running and cowering in a corner, it's not fair to you that--"
"Please don't apologize, darling, you have nothing to be sorry for." He righted your positions on the couch, delicately stroking your hair and giving you a soft peck on your lips before he stood, offering you his hand. "I think we could both benefit from cooling off a bit. Would you like to join the others outside?"
Despite having offered it yourself just a few minutes earlier, your stomach dropped when the tables had turned, knowing that you'd put a stop to something that could have turned out completely mind-blowing and possibly even life changing. Only thing was, when you reached the peak of a relationship, that was it.
The only way forward was down.
"You go ahead," you told him, walking toward your bedroom. "I'll just change into my sweats first…so no one asks questions."
By some miracle, no one on the team had caught on yet that you two had started seeing each other and had been in a relationship for the better part of the year. And neither of you seemed to be itching to burst your little bubble of privacy quite yet, knowing that the second the team knew, Wanda and Nat would be down your throat with questions practically begging for every detail. And Thor would be doing much of the same for his brother.
At least that was the story you tried to tell yourself. It was better than what that little voice in your head tried to scream at you every time he didn't take the seat next to you. Or when he'd drop your hand and take a few steps back the second he heard someone rounding the corner.
Loki gave you a strained smile, starting to walk toward your front door. "I'll see you outside then." Before you could reach your bedroom, he called out to you. "I love you, little mortal."
You blinked back the tears that were threatening to come out, looking back at him with a contrived smile of your own. "I love you, too, Mischief."
A good few minutes passed before you exited your apartment, the movie paused on the TV and a rather lively discussion being had among your teammates. Something about Barnes' new girlfriend.
"Oh good you're here, jellybean, welcome to the circus," Tony greeted you, jutting his chin toward the empty seat next to Wanda. "Need your input on something."
Instead of taking the seat, you walked over to the bar to pour yourself a glass of wine. You had a feeling you were gonna need it. On your way there, you spotted Loki seated near his brother, giving you a minuscule smile and a tiny wave of his hand.
"Go ahead, I'm listening," you called out.
"Stark's trying to tell me the woman I'm seeing isn't all that interested in me because she doesn't want to spend the night," Bucky started. "Said she's just with me for the aesthetic of dating me, whatever backwards 21st Century nonsense that is. I'm trying to tell the rest of these horn dogs that maybe she's just not ready yet. Good things take time. Flowers need to blossom--"
"Sarge, don't ever say that line again, it's so cheesy you'll attract rats in here," you shot back, pointing your finger at the soldier before turning toward Stark. "That said though…I'm with Bucky on this one, Stark. Maybe she's just not ready yet I mean…not everyone's ready to drop trou and put out so easily, you know. How long have you been dating this girl anyways?" You turned back to Bucky as you asked the question.
"Three weeks? Give or take?"
"Dammit Stark, it's only been three weeks, give our boy some time." You made a show of facepalming before you picked up your glass, plopping down next to Wanda who immediately rested her head on your shoulder.
"They've been at this for the last ten minutes," she groaned. "Wake me when they put the movie back on." Meanwhile, you clocked Nat next to her, not so subtly massaging her temples in an attempt to calm herself down. You shared the feeling; this was such a common sense discussion it shouldn't have lasted thirty seconds.
"Well then perhaps you could provide some insight for another situation, Lady Y/N," Thor boomed from across the floor, swatting his brother's hand away when he tried to get the blond Asgardian to stop.
"Brother you really need not--"
"Nonsense. Lady Y/N seems knowledgeable on how timetables and relations between mortals work, perhaps she'll finally give the perspective I have been seeking."
Your boyfriend shot you a look, as if he was already embarrassed by what his brother was about to say, piquing your curiosity even more. "I'm all ears, Thunder. Ask away."
"My brother has been seeing a mortal woman for the better part of the last Midgardian year. My best estimate…eight moons," he began, your stomach once again dropping at the realization that he was about to ask your insight about…yourself. You gave him a motion to go on, placing your glass on the table to hide the way your hand had begun to shake. "And while it has been as you here on Midgard would say 'like pulling teeth' trying to get him to divulge any detail about her, something I have surmised is that she also seems unwilling to spend the night with him. Yet he claims they love each other."
"Yikes, tough break, Reindeer Games!" Tony winced. "My two cents? You're not just on the same boat with Barnes over here, you're the goddamn captain of the ship. Go on, jellybean, tell him."
"I-I…" you stuttered, your heart thundering in your chest from unwittingly having been placed on the proverbial hot seat. "Maybe she just…wants to be sure, you know? I mean…I don't know how y'all do it in Asgard but here, with some people, being intimate is…something m-more than physical."
You could see from where you sat that the raven-haired god's fingers were twitching, his leg bouncing as if he wanted to stand up and leave the room. You pretty much wanted out of this, too.
Thor waved off your explanation. "I completely disagree. That amount of time passed, I believe one should be sure lest she be wasting both of their time. Brother, much as I can tell you love this mortal, it is my expert opinion, which I believe will be backed by the men in this room, that your mortal woman does not love you. This is, as our genius friend Stark has stated earlier, all for the optics of having you at her arm."
It was getting impossible to breathe. How dare he say that about you right in your face like this? Thinking he knew everything there was to know about your relationship just because he was in one of his own?
"You know not the first thing about her, Brother," Loki hissed, speaking through his teeth as if he was readying himself to strike.
"I know enough," the blond Asgardian shot back dismissively. "You know I think the world of you, Brother, and after everything you've endured, you deserve every bit of happiness this universe will grant you." He clapped his hand on Loki's shoulder. "If this mortal shares not this sentiment, then perhaps your time is better spent elsewhere."
"He's right, Mischief," you choked out, your voice so small you were surprised it even traveled that far that it had everyone looking to you. "Maybe you are wasting your time with this one…you know, if she's making you wait so long." You stood up abruptly, making Wanda groan in protest when she nearly fell over to the spot you'd just vacated.
In what was probably your most poorly miscalculated decision for the night, you downed your wine in a single gulp, starting to walk back to your apartment.
"Hey where you going, jellybean, you just got here," Tony hollered from his seat. "Come on, I know talking about Frosty the Snowman's nonexistent sex life was a drag, how about we all drop it for now, I'll order some tacos and we can go back to grilling Manchie here."
"Or we could lay off either of us and grill someone else for a change?" Bucky groaned, throwing his human arm over his eyes as he turned his face to the ceiling.
"You know what, you are so right, let's talk about the big guy who has a lot to say about being the resident relationship expert." Stark turned to face Thor. "How is Lady Thunder lately? And how are you with the whole your old hammer chooses her over you thing?"
The conversation faded into a dulled roar in your ears as the wine begun to take what fleeting effect it would have on you, your pulse faintly thumping in your ears as you made your way back to your apartment.
You hadn't even been back two minutes before your door swung open again, the God of Mischief standing at your entryway looking a mix of concerned and distraught. "Darling, I completely apologize for my oaf of a brother, I had no idea he would--"
"It's okay, Loki," you cut him off, throwing your hands up as if to push away the conversation. "Maybe he's on to something, I mean you should be with someone who doesn't take forever and a day to be ready for something like this, maybe we should--"
In an instant, he stood inches away from you, placing his hands on your shoulders in a gentle but firm grasp. "Don't say another word, my love, please." He rubbed his hands up and down your arms in a soothing gesture; whether it was to soothe you or him was beyond you.
"You want more, I get that," you pressed on. "And I can't give that to you--"
"You are all that I want, precious mortal." He leaned in, pressing a desperate kiss to your lips before wrapping his arms around you. "I am already more than content that you've even granted me the honor to know who you are outside of our duties. This is all I need, to be able to love you as I have these past moons."
Tears began to fall from your eyes as your words weighed heavy on your tongue. "I'm sure there's someone out there more than willing to give you what I can't, it's selfish of me to keep you--"
"Stop, little mortal, I beg of you," he pleaded, repeatedly pressing his lips to your forehead. "Don't rid yourself of me like this. I don't care if there's someone else out there, they aren't you." He sat you both down back on the couch, cradling you against his chest as his hand rubbed up and down your back in soothing motions. "Please just try to put what my oaf of a brother said out of your mind. His opinion is entirely his own and it is one I do not share."
Your next question blurted out without much resistance. "Loki what if I never become ready? What if you really are wasting your time with me, you shouldn't--"
"Any time I spend with you, regardless of how it is spent, is never a waste," he whispered, stroking your face as he held your gaze. "If ever you decide to share that part of yourself with me, it will be an honor that I will cherish for the rest of my days, but I will never be the one to place pressure on you to move yourself at a pace you're uncomfortable with."
You nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck, prompting him to press a kiss to your temple when you sniffled from the tears you were trying and failing to hold back. "I do love you," you mumbled against him. "You know that, right?"
"Of course I do, my darling mortal." He pressed his cheek against yours, taking deep breaths to calm himself after the scare your words from earlier gave him. He wanted to punch his brother clean across the jaw for jeopardizing his happiness with his careless words, and the stabbing pain it put him through seeing how deeply that opinion had cut you.
He started moving toward your bedroom, carrying you in his arms bridal style. Mostly in refusal to let you go even for a fraction of a moment.
"What're you doing?" you mumbled, making a motion to move out of his arms.
"We're going to bed, darling. Just to sleep, nothing more, I swear."
"Hmph…" you shook your head, the motion making the tip of your nose nuzzle his neck in a slight tickling sensation. "Maybe…maybe you should stay at your place tonight." Your voice was so small, so unsure of what you'd just said. The god stopped in his tracks, his body going rigid and making you immediately regret your words.
"Do you want me to leave, dear heart?" he choked out, his heart at war with himself as it protested against him putting you back down on your feet.
"No," you admitted, lifting your head from his shoulder and showing him the tears that had begun to redden your eyes. "I want you to stay, I'll always want you to stay, I just don't…" Your breath hitched in the back of your throat, almost sounding like a hiccup. "I don't want you to be frustrated because of me--"
"I'm not," he reassured you, resting his forehead on yours. "Being with you like this is more than enough for me. I need you to know this, my darling."
He laid you down on your bed before his clothes changed into his own loungewear set with a wash of his green magic, settling under the covers next to you and pulling you into his arms.
"Promise me something, Mischief?"
"Anything."
"If…and when…the time comes that you get tired of waiting? And you want to be with someone else--"
"Little mortal, not another word." He tightened his hold on you, as if he couldn't hold you close enough. "Please, my love, let's just retire for the night."
"Just let me get this out," you insisted. "Let me say my piece and I'll never mention it again. Okay?"
He sighed, pressing a lingering kiss to your forehead. "Okay."
"If you want to be with someone else, just promise you'll tell me and leave me first? I don't wanna find out waking up one morning and seeing someone else with her arms around you and just waving it around for everyone to see." Your voice dwindled and wavered into barely a whisper, your arm tightening around his midsection, a part of you already refusing to give him up even if the day were to come.
"That will never happen," he told you. "Why would I ever wish to leave you?"
"Just--Just promise me anyway. Please?"
"Look at me, little mortal." He traced along your jaw with his finger, tilting your chin up so he could see your eyes. The sight of the genuine fear of that precise outcome reflected in your expression knocked nearly all of the air from the god's lungs. "On the remotest chance of that happening, I promise I will never do wrong by you. But I want nothing more than for you rest assured that I will never wish to be with another.
"Perhaps one day you'll believe it. But I will gladly spend my days proving my devotion to you. This…This I will gladly swear to you. On whatever semblance of a soul I have left." He brushed the tip of his nose against yours before pressing a tender kiss to the same spot. "I love you, my darling Y/N."
You finally settled in his embrace, resting your head on his chest as you began to let your breathing even out. "I love you, too, Loki."
Just the thought of history repeating itself one day had your blood going cold, feeling as if your very bones were shaking from the images your mind conjured of the inevitable day that Loki would leave you. Somewhere deep inside you knew it was ridiculous for you to even think that your boyfriend was anywhere even near capable of putting you through what he had all those years ago.
But that was the thing about fear. Sometimes it was rational, like jumping out of the Quinjet and having a passing scare that your parachute had a hole in it. And other times it was outright absurd. Like now. Thinking that in the morning after you first had sex, the god would have realized there wasn't anything worth spending more time with. That he'd have had his fill of you and now it was time to move on to better prospects.
It didn't help, either, that your overly cautious mind was yelling that the signs were all there. That it could tell you exactly where this was headed because of the dropped hands. The refusal to even sit near each other. The barely there acknowledgement when you were even in the same room together. Everything that had happened before with him…felt like a mirror image of what was happening now. With Loki.
And you didn't have it in you to tell him that his desire for privacy was slowly and quite surely crushing you.
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A/N: Starting off another story from the request pile! This is going to have 3 parts, where both parts 1 and 2 will deliver on the more angsty part and part 3 will be the comfort/fluff. I know you asked for "90% angst", Anon, but hopefully 10k words worth of angst will do it…because part 2 is 6.5k words long 😳👀
everything taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @peaches1958 @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @lunarnights95 @superficialdomina @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @tom-hlover
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softgreengrass · 2 months
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The Gold
Natasha Romanoff x Reader
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Summary: angst, au where clint dies on vormir instead of natasha, set a few months after endgame, relationship troubles😬
Word Count: 1.3k
Warnings: survivor’s guilt, breakup
Author’s Note: based on “the gold” by manchester orchestra and phoebe bridgers
You wake to birds chirping. Natasha has opened the window. She’s nowhere to be seen, probably in the kitchen or out for a run. All at once, a crushing melancholy falls onto your chest, the one that’s been appearing with increasing frequency ever since she returned.
She hadn’t wanted to come back; anyone could see that. She wished she was dead instead of Clint, instead of Tony. And she meant it. She wanted to be dead.
Because of that, it had never felt like a victory to you. You knew the others agreed —Wanda, Peter, Bucky— but that didn’t make it much easier.
Even the things Thanos hadn’t taken, he had changed.
You get up slowly, all too aware of the lump in your throat and the fragility of your heart. If Natasha so much as looks at you wrong this morning, you’ll lose it. Again.
You know she’s tired of it, of your mood swings and sensitivity, but it all stems from her and she knows that too. Those first few weeks after her return had set a certain tone.
Natasha is standing at the kitchen counter, staring at the coffee pot. You know why instantly. You always do.
“I forgot how he used to drink straight from this,” she murmurs.
“I know.”
You’ve grown used to Natasha’s blank stare: it doesn’t twist your heart the way it used to. Some days you think she found your biggest store of sympathy and dried it all up. You shuffle past her, open the freezer, and pull out hash browns.
“I was going to visit Laura today,” she says numbly.
“You visited her yesterday, baby,” you say, glancing up at her as you dump the hash browns onto a pan. “I think she’s okay for today.”
Natasha swallows. You can see the pain in her eyes, the sinkhole of regret. “I don’t have any other plans.”
“You could stay home with me.”
Your tone is neutral, but you know she picks up on the hope in it. And you can feel the distance that grows between you the longer she takes to answer.
“Come on, Nat,” you smile, like your eyes aren’t already stinging with tears.
“I want to be useful,” she pleads. “I… you’re too good to me here. I can’t be useful.”
It takes you a second to process what on earth she could possibly mean. Natasha stands quietly.
In another life, you could’ve said the words on your tongue. Could’ve told her that you need her like water, that the most useful thing she could possibly do is just be with you. But you know you can survive without her. At this point she must know that too.
And yet, there’s something yearning in her eyes, like she has faith in you.
The hash browns crackle and give you an excuse to look at them instead of her.
Somewhere deep inside of you, you know Natasha has always been fine without you. She doesn’t love you in the way you love her, in the way that would summon sympathy and energy out of thin air. She used to, maybe. It’s all bitter on your tongue.
She clears her throat. “I got an email. Apparently they want to give us medals.“
“You brought back half the universe. The least you deserve is a medal.”
You know what she wants to say to that. The silence is frustrated and thick, the lump in your throat quickly returning. You hate that nothing is easy anymore.
“I’m going to Laura’s,” she says eventually.
You can’t find it in you to respond; you can barely make yourself nod. The oil on the pan bubbles and spatters violently, and you realize that’s how your blood feels, singing your arteries and your veins and your heart.
When the door closes behind her, you close your eyes.
Your dad’s face comes to mind. “Don’t open your eyes for a while,” he used to say, his voice gravelly but gentle. “Just breathe that moment down.”
It had helped, especially in your teenage years when you were quick to anger and quicker to hurt. Regret used to swallow you whole. You had told Natasha that once, years ago, when you visited his grave together for the first time. She had been polite.
You don’t want to resent her. God, how you don’t. But the past couple of months have worn you down to the bone, and it would be one thing if she was fighting too, but she gave up on that cliff. You don’t know how much longer you can do all the caring for.
And it’s not like your relationship was perfect before, either. You had met her at a high point. It had always been a steady decline.
A hard wave of guilt nearly knocks the breath out of you, and you have to grip the counter to keep your balance. You love her. You’ll fight for as long as you can.
You eat the burnt hash browns right out of the pan, even though you don’t feel hungry.
By ten, Natasha still hasn’t come home, and you’re back in bed, blinking back more tears, since that feels like all you do nowadays. Now accompanying the gloom and guilt in your ribcage is an unrelenting discomfort. It’s that same old helpless feeling, the one that knows things are going to change and there’s nothing you can do about it.
The vertigo of it all rocks you to sleep.
You make it another week before one of Natasha’s nightmares wakes you up and you’re so full of discontent you can’t breathe. Still, you swallow it down and find her hand in the dark.
“Nat, you’re right here,” you whisper.
A squeeze of her hand and she opens her eyes, frantically looking around.
“It was just a dream.”
Wild eyes find your own; a sheen of sweat coats her face. Her breath heaves. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.” The words burn in your throat. How many times will you have to tell her that?
Her head falls back against the pillow with a sigh.
Your eyes ache for sleep, but then there it is again, that realization that soon you might never be in bed with her again. You’re not sure how to appreciate it fully.
“Are you hungry?” she asks coarsely, staring up at the ceiling.
You’re not. “I could eat.”
She smears peanut butter onto toast into the kitchen, gives the first one to you. It must be the millionth time the two of you have been in the kitchen together, dark circles under your eyes and hair frizzy.
“You know I wish none of that ever happened,” Natasha says softly.
“Of course,” you furrow your brow. “I wish it didn’t either.”
“No, I mean,” she huffs. “I wish we didn’t change. I wish I didn’t change.”
It’s like something has pierced your heart. You can’t find anything to say to comfort her, because you wish that just as much as she does.
“I don’t want you to go,” she admits, her bottom lip quivering. “But I don’t want to hold you back just because I’m stuck.”
“Nat…”
She swallows thickly. “It’s your choice.”
You hate that you already know your answer, that you’ve known it for so long. You hate it.
Your arms wrap around her tightly as you take in her softness and her scent again. Her cheek is damp against your shoulder, your own eyes welling with relentless tears.
It feels like stiff fingers prodding at your throat and your chest: it makes you want to curl into a ball. You’re horrified at the idea of a life without her, especially one where you know she’s still walking around. But it’s either drown or freefall, and you need to give yourself a chance.
“I’m sorry, baby,” you mutter into her neck.
“It’s okay,” she whispers. “I’m sorry too.”
She holds you as wave after wave of bittersweet relief and regret crash over you, and you fall asleep in each other’s arms once more. The next morning she helps you gather your things.
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buckyalpine · 2 months
Text
Bucky in blue pjs who is soft and shy and so cute but sometimes sleeps naked when it gets too hot - I really love a happy, cuddly, shy Bucky. I thought this was adorable, I refuse to not make you all think about it too:
Bucky who got the softest pair of baby blue pj's for his birthday and it's all he wears to sleep. It's his favorite thing ever. He blushed when he saw the letters JBB sewed on the inside; he has no idea who got it for him and he's happy to let it remain a mystery though he secretly hopes they're from you. He saw you sneaking a peek at the size label of his t shirt before scurrying off out the door.
He looks so cozy when he's lounging in them, usually tucked in some corner with a book, a glass of milk and some chocolate chip cookies. He was also given a new pillow; a firm one that wasn't too soft. At first he was reluctant to use it but now he can't go anywhere without it. Imagine how precious he'd look trudging around with it on a moving night because he's sleepy but he doesn't want to miss out either. He starts off awake but seconds later, his face is smushed into the pillow and he's softly snoring. You always make sure to tuck him in with the throw blanket and it never fails to make him let out a content little sigh. Him being a soft, shy little cutie is exactly why the next part is everything.
Him sleeping naked.
As the weather warms up, the AC is on full blast and thank god for Stark technology because it can get as cold as winter if needed.
However.
It wasn't perfect.
It conked out and it leaves everyone as grumpy as ever because no one can sleep and Tony keeps insisting he'll figure it out any day now. Everyone looks miserable except Bucky. He looks as happy as a clam coming down for breakfast in his favorite pj's.
"How on earth did you get any sleep Bucky?" You can't believe he looks so well rested, especially when he has the serum that keeps him extra warm.
"And you're in full on pajamas, you slept in that?!" Steve gawks from the side while you also continue to look at him curiously, his cheeks tinting pink.
"I-
What no one knows is Bucky sleeps naked as the day he was born when it gets too hot. His body did a decent job of regulating heat on its own but throwing off the extra layers didn't hurt.
Of course, he didn't want to tell anyone that part.
The part where when it gets too warm, he starts off by shucking off his shirt. Then eventually his pants. He could keep his boxers on but his door was locked and it just feel so freeing-
"Buck?"
"I slept fine!" He blurts out hoping you wouldn't pry anymore while his best friend stares at him suspiciously. He races out of the kitchen as soon as he has his coffee and he hopes to drop the subject.
But he isn't so lucky.
Because on a particularly exhausting night, he doesn't realize he didn't fully shut his door. You were on your way to your room, peeking in to say goodnight seeing as he hadn't closed the door yet but-
You squeaked seeing his perfectly toned ass, thighs spread apart, back muscles relaxed, all on full display, blinking frozen on the spot before quickly slipping out of his room and shutting the door behind you.
You're beyond giddy for the rest night, unable to shake the image of a very naked, sleeping Bucky out of your mind; his pretty face relaxed, the gentle snores, his meaty legs, his cute butt-
stop.
You will yourself to think of something else but how could you when he looked so perfect. The next day Bucky notices you acting jumpy around him while making breakfast which is unusual for you...
"Everything okay, y/n?" He asks so gently and you nearly melt on the spot, biting back a smile.
"I-I came by your room to say good night, thought you were still awake" You shrug, eyes flicking to his before looking back down at your feet, letting him piece together what you were hinting at. His brows furrow before his eyes grow wide, cheeks flushed down to his neck and up to his ears. You could have sworn you heard him squeak when he stammers out a response. Barely.
"Oh-I-when-what time did you come" He has no idea what you saw or didn't see but either way he knows you know. He hadn't even bothered with clothes the night before going right from the shower straight to bed, fuck what if you didn't want to speak to him again-
"I see why you're able to sleep so well now. It's our secret" You throw him a wink, giggling before running off and Bucky nearly faints himself, he thought he couldn't possibly fall in love more but-
Anyway idk what's wrong with me, my mind has been off the deep end somewhere.
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talesofesther · 5 months
Text
make it taste like love
Loki x Reader
Summary: You felt him before you even met him. And despite the pain he carried around, his soul was one of the most beautiful you'd ever seen.
A/N: A spur-of-the-moment idea that I simply couldn't ignore. I really hope you guys enjoy it, and yes I'm working on part two of my series with Loki as well. <3
Word count: 6k
Masterlist
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The battle had left its mark on everyone, both physically and mentally. All the lives that were lost wouldn't be brought back. But everyone took solace in the fact that Thanos and his army were no longer a threat. And now, it was a time for rebuilding.
Wakanda's grassland was a battlefield. Bodies of both friend and foe lay scattered on the ground. The mourning loomed heavy in the air, you could feel it weighing down on your chest, your throat, and lungs. It was suffocating, prickling into your skin like needles. Yet you still walked, your boots crushing the grass underneath while you avoided stepping on stretched arms and legs, you needed to make sure no one else remained left behind.
A few feet away, the mad titan who once threatened the entire universe lay lifeless on the ground, his head disconnected from his body. For him, you felt no pity.
King T'Challa was both happy and sad to see you and the others leave. Happy, because it meant the end of a war; sad, because of having to say farewell to dear friends. But you, Steve, Natasha, and Banner were needed back in town, back at the Avengers compound; to welcome Tony back on earth, and because Thanos' attack had reverberated in many other places. It seemed like the Avengers were back in the game.
─── ·❆· ───
This morning was a gloomy one. Grey skies peeked behind your curtains in the early hours of the day, maybe it would rain soon. It's been two weeks since the battle, and you were glad to see that most people were recovering; each in their own way, but recovering nonetheless.
You were already up when the clock hit 7:30 AM, holding a warm cup of coffee between your hands, and staring out into the compound's driveway and past the treeline through the big windows of the kitchen. Today would be the day that Thor came back, he'd been helping with the settling of his people in New Asgard until now, but you've heard about him not wanting to be king anymore. You were happy for him, you never did think that a ruler's life suited him anyway—and you missed your friend.
"He gets one chance, Rogers. One chance and that's it." Tony's voice suddenly caught your attention as he stepped into the kitchen, you turned your back to the window so you could watch as your resident Iron Man poured himself a cup of coffee without looking at his mug. Steve was right beside him, his hands on his hips as he sighed quietly, already all too used to Tony's moods.
"Yes, one chance, he proved himself enough by helping us fight against Thanos, I suppose we owe him the benefit of the doubt," Steve agreed, still holding his voice calm.
With a smirk on your lips, you approached your teammates. "What's going on, guys?" You leaned on the kitchen island, taking a sip of your coffee.
Tony ran his tongue over his bottom lip, his expression less than pleased as he took a sip of his own coffee before saying; "point break is bringing his beloved brother to our home." He shrugged, and said in a quieter tone, "Says he changed or something."
"Loki will be staying with us?" You raised an eyebrow. The attack on New York happened before you joined the team, but you were familiar enough with it to be wary of Thor's brother, even if Thor did speak more nicely of him recently. Still, you had never actually met Loki to form your own opinion.
"That's… to be decided," Tony grumbled, shooting a glance toward Steve. "But yes, pretty much. And, by the way, Strange wasn't happy about having reindeer games back in the city either."
"Wow, you guys finally agree on something," you snickered.
Tony mouthed a 'don't' to you, before Steve said; "Strange knows we'll handle it if anything happens, but Thor vouches for him, so…"
You gave Steve a soft smile, and as much as you understood Tony's wariness, you agreed with the Captain. Loki didn't have the best of pasts with the City, but his help in the recent battle was one of many game-changers. He deserved a second chance.
Strangely enough, you found yourself excited to meet the God of Mischief. It was in your nature to analyze people, watch them from afar, and learn about the things they'd rather not say out loud. And someone like Loki, who had both once tried to take over your planet and now helped in saving it, was bound to raise some curiosity.
No more than an hour passed before you heard Thor's strong voice all the way from the living room. A small smile instantly came to your lips as you discarded your book, got up from the couch, and put on your slippers, rushing to the main doors to greet him.
Before you could turn the last corner, however, you came to an abrupt halt. Your breath got caught up in your throat and you had to lean back on the wall for support. Clutching the fabric of your shirt right above your heart, you were glad that this particular hallway was currently empty.
You could hear Thor's voice just around the corner, Tony was there too, but their words were faint and far away. Your vision was suddenly a little blurry, and underneath your palm you could feel your heart beating frantically.
See, this was nothing that hadn't happened before, after all, you are an empath. But a feeling this heavy rarely comes unannounced, unwanted. It briefly reminded you of when you first discovered your power, when you had no control and could pick up on pain, anger, joy, and pleasure that were not your own even if you didn't want to. Yet now, after years of living with it, you had learned to dose your perception of the feelings around you; now, when you weren't willingly focusing, other people's emotions felt more like a gentle whisper, a gush of chilly wind on your skin—something you were able to ignore if you wanted to.
But this overwhelming sadness; this emptiness, and loss, and pain; it came to you with such force that you were not able to block out. Seconds felt like hours, until the surprise of the new feeling passed and you took back control. Whispers of it remained, lurking in your stomach and in the back of your throat, but with a bit of extra focus, you were able to handle it.
And once your mind was finally clear again, it hit you. Who did you catch these feelings from?
You took a step around the corner cautiously, hands buried in your pockets as your eyes roamed your surroundings. There was no one around besides Tony, Thor, and Loki.
You knew it right away. You were familiar with the emotions radiating from Tony and Thor; but him, the raven-haired trickster, he was new, and if you didn't feel empathy for him before, you did now.
Loki held himself immaculately, a straight posture and a serene expression on his face. You had no idea how he did it, how he was able to hold all of those feelings in and still look so well put together; because one glance into his soul and you already felt like crying.
There was a light drizzle falling outside, maybe that's why Loki's black blazer seemed to be shining under the bright lights of the entrance hall. His eyes—bright and ocean-green—were settled on you; the realization got you feeling hyperaware of each movement you made. Even his gaze was heavy.
Thor's booming voice calling your name captured your attention then, he had a big smile on his face and before you knew it he already had your feet off the floor as he held you in a hug.
You laughed against his shoulder, hugging him back just as tight and telling him all about how much you missed him. Still, when you let go, your eyes found Loki's again, he hadn't stopped looking at you once.
─── ·❆· ───
The opinions about Loki's presence in the compound were mixed, but most of your teammates seemed fine with it; truth be told, no one paid much attention to him. As you'd expected, Loki's room was on your floor, because that's where Thor stayed too; as well as Tony, Natasha, and Yelena.
It's been a few days since his arrival, yet you haven't had the opportunity to properly speak with him, alone. But you've been feeling him a lot. Whether it was you subconsciously focusing on him more, or something else, it seemed like your body was more in tune and connected with his than you've ever been with anyone else. You picked up on a few of his emotions even if you weren't actively trying to; you felt his bouts of uneasiness when someone would stare at him for too long, you felt his gentle serenity whenever he'd sit near the windows to read a book, you felt his sparks of joy when people greeted him with a good morning or asked if he'd want coffee; but most of all, you still felt that lingering sadness that followed him everywhere he went, a weight he seemed to be all too used to having around.
In some ways, you felt as if you were invading his privacy, and that bothered you. During the day you tried to keep your mind as busy as you could to keep yourself from feeling him; in the late hours of the night though, when you were trying to sleep, there wasn't much you could do.
You have been tossing and turning in bed for probably about two hours now, drifting in and out of sleep. The crescent moon just outside your window seemed to be taunting you, amused with your misfortune. You scoffed as you glared at the natural satellite—great, now you were arguing with the cosmos.
Loki was having a nightmare. You could tell by the rapid beating of his heart and the cold sweat running down his forehead—your abilities went way beyond simply feeling other people's emotions, but sometimes you wished they wouldn't. It's not the first time that you've felt Loki's restless sleep in the short time he's been here. Your heart ached for him; it got you wanting to alleviate his pain.
But you couldn't do that, so you got up from your bed, put on your fluffy slippers, and made a beeline for the kitchen. The air outside was chilly, biting at your warm skin and making you shiver. At this hour of the night, the compound was completely dark and quiet, a big contrast to how it was when the sun was up. You asked Friday to turn on one of the lights in the kitchen, giving the space a dim-lit look as the single light bled into the adjacent living room.
You rubbed the sleep from your eyes, humming the lyrics of the song stuck in your head as you reached for the upper cabinet to grab a mug so you could make yourself some tea. When you turned around again though, a gasp escaped your mouth and you nearly dropped the mug you were holding. You cursed quietly under your breath, placing a hand over your heart; if you weren't fully awake before, you sure were now. "You scared me," you muttered, trying a small smile.
The reason for your lack of sleep stood before you, with dark green slippers that matched his button-up pajama shirt, and his hair the messier you've ever seen it be. "Sorry, it was not my intention," Loki smirked back at you.
It hit you that this was finally the first time you were alone with him, and you'd been caught off guard. You tapped your mug, opening your lips but no words came out. Loki's eyes remained on you, unwavering, yet his gaze was so… soft, gentle even; his eyebrows weren't creased and he patiently waited for you with his hands in the pockets of his checkered pajama pants. He didn't look like the god you usually saw roaming the halls during the day.
"It's alright. I was just making tea," you said finally, gesturing to your mug, "would you like me to make one for you too?"
Loki's surprise at your offer was so great that you felt it in your bones. What was he expecting you to do?
His lips parted only slightly and he straightened his posture before saying; "I would- yes, I would like that."
You couldn't help the full smile that came to your lips and crinkled the side of your eyes, "great, sit down, it'll be ready in just a moment."
The warm mug between your hands warmed up your skin. It felt nice, sitting like this with Loki; in a quiet kitchen with only you and him, and just the lonely light to your left softly highlighting his features in front of you. It was a peaceful silence, and you couldn't help but check if he felt it too.
The rhythm of his heart was calm, his soul felt light and at ease; not completely, but the most you've ever felt from him.
"Why are you here?" His sultry voice snapped you back to reality.
"Uh- I'm sorry?" You frowned.
"Why are you here, if I may ask?" Loki tilted his head amusedly, his fingers tracing the brim of his mug. "Thor mentioned you had… abilities, but he never specified what they are."
Now it was your turn to be surprised by his curiosity for you. "Well, to put it simply, I'm an empath," you told him.
Loki blinked, once, twice, at your response. He looked at you for a moment before inquiring further; "and to put it completely?"
You smirked then, folding your arms over the table. "I can feel people's emotions, if I want to; their anger, happiness, hesitation, fear. But I can also feel their heartbeats, the blood cursing through their bodies. I can tell when they're lying or telling the truth, if they're tired or hurt. And sometimes, I can influence those emotions," you paused, hesitating for a beat, "bring fear, or… take away pain."
Loki grew tense after learning of what you could do. To be fair, most people did at first, you were used to it. Be he felt different, his heartbeat sped up and stayed that way. He'd put his guard up, and it brought a pang of hurt to your chest.
"Are you always feeling everything then?" He narrowed his eyes.
"Gods, no," you breathed, "at first I did, and it was awful. But with time, I learned to control it." You tried smiling at him, but his eyes were downcast, focused on his mug.
You bit your lower lip in nervousness. Looking past Loki and out the window, you could see the first signs of the sunrise peeking over the horizon, dark skies turning a soft lilac and blue; you'd been here longer than you realized.
When Loki glanced up at you again, his bright eyes still held sparks of that same softness from earlier. He pursed his lips in a smile; "thank you for the tea." And with that, he got up and left, leaving you in the company of the first birds who always sang in the mornings.
─── ·❆· ───
You made Loki nervous. It wasn't a bad kind of nervous, it was the kind that sped up his heart and made his cold hands feel clammy.
Out of everyone in the compound, you were the kindest. You'd always shoot him a smile whenever you'd pass by each other in the hallways; you'd always save a seat for him at the table; you always respected his silence whenever you came into the library and caught him reading his book, saying a quiet hello and nothing more, just sitting on one of the armchairs with your own book and allowing him to enjoy his moment, and more recently, your presence too.
When he'd finally learned of your abilities, he got apprehensive, worried even; that you'd pick up on whatever it was that he felt when he was near you, and it would drive you away.
So far, it hasn't happened yet.
The sun was out today, and with it, so was everyone else. In the spacious backyard of the compound, Steve was in charge of the barbecue, and Tony was in charge of the drinks. Natasha had sunglasses covering her eyes while she and Clint bickered over a game of cards; Yelena was sitting beside her sister at the lunch table, however, she seemed to be on Clint's side of the argument. Thor and Banner were laughing together as they made fun of Steve's cooking skills, who tried to defend himself by saying he wasn't actually done yet. Tony looked like he was trying to convince Bucky to drink a dubious-looking beverage, the latter didn't seem too keen on it.
And Loki watched them from afar, from the living room window of his floor. Thor had asked that he join them downstairs, saying something about how he should start trying to fit in and mingle, instead of just existing in the others' presence. Making friends wasn't Loki's forte; as much as he'd fight not to admit it, he was still working up the courage.
With a long sigh, Loki turned around and made his way to the place where he'd been spending most of his free time.
The compound's library was quite huge. One of the few rooms in the whole facility that had warm colors painting the walls and lacked the modern look; tall wooden shelves held thousands of books, a soft beige carpet covered the floor, and there were armchairs and sofas scattered in corners and in-between shelves creating comfortable, isolated nooks for reading. Loki's favorite spot was a worn armchair that stood near one of the big windows, it was surrounded by books that most people didn't read anymore, and the window itself overlooked the treeline in which the sun hid behind at the end of every day; sometimes as he sat there to read, it reminded him of his room back in Asgard.
Loki walked brushing his fingers over the spine of the old books, watching as dust particles danced in the sunlight. But as he rounded the shelf that led to his spot, he abruptly stopped in his tracks, feet glued to the carpet.
You sat cross-legged on the worn armchair, with a thick book lying in your lap that held all of your attention; the sun was shining right behind you, creating a halo above your head and bathing the strands of your hair in golden. You looked like something out of his favorite tale, more enchanting than all of the Midgard poetry books he's ever read.
It seemed like you two were making a habit of bumping into each other unexpectedly.
Loki gulped, squaring his shoulders. A beat passed, and then two, until you finally noticed him from the corner of your eyes. You looked up at him with your eyebrows softly raised in surprise, a gentle smile lifted the sides of your mouth; "Loki, hi."
"Hello," Loki greeted you slowly, his eyes shifting from the book in your lap to your eyes, "shouldn't you be out with the others, enjoying the sun?"
"Should I?" You narrowed your eyes, lazily closing your book and getting up from the armchair. "Shouldn't you?" You asked then, smirking as you raised an eyebrow and took a step towards him.
Loki's heart stumbled inside his chest, he breathed out a laugh. "I'm not big on hangouts."
You hummed, burying your hands in the pockets of your jeans. "Why is that?"
For a moment, Loki dwelled on whether to be honest or come up with an easy lie. But you were looking up at him with such delicacy, such attention, not a trace of hatred or judgment in your warm eyes. It almost looked as if you cared... about him.
Loki breathed in sharply through his nose, the words rolled off his tongue on their own; "I doubt many of your friends would enjoy my presence there."
You blinked up at him, lips parting before you told him quietly; "I would."
There was a distant burning behind Loki's eyes, his mouth felt dry. No one had ever rendered him completely speechless before, yet now, you had done just that. With his silence, you avoided his eyes and ran your tongue over your bottom lip in a motion that he couldn't help but follow.
"And..." You continued, voice sweet as honey, traveling between the bookshelves in the secluded library, "We'll never know if we don't try, right?"
The way you referred to you and him as 'we' got a foreign feeling blossoming inside Loki's chest, all warm and tingly. When you offered him your hand, so you could guide him downstairs to meet the others, he took it.
─── ·❆· ───
After a full week of taking care of the whole city, Saturday nights were a time for having fun and relaxing; aka movie nights with the team. Everyone sat together in the main living room of the compound, Tony had labeled it 'mandatory bonding day'. The room itself was pretty spacious, dimly lit, with two big comfortable couches and a TV that almost covered the whole wall, and a small kitchen right beside it for easy snacks and drinks.
"Right, I'm thinking... Terminator." Tony suggested as he came from the kitchen with an extra large bowl of popcorn in his arms.
"We saw that one already," Steve complained as he fumbled with the remote.
"There are multiple ones," Tony said, smugly, as he plopped himself on the couch and threw popcorn in his mouth.
Thor, who sat beside you, suddenly perked up with a giddy smile on his face; "oh I've always enjoyed that one who has the girl with the long, magic hair." The god gestured to his own hair.
Tony gaped at him, his fingers holding the popcorn were frozen midair. "Tangled?" He exclaimed then, eyebrows raised, "You wanna watch Tangled? in my house?"
You fought to hide a smile. "Technically it's our house," you quipped, after all, you were to blame for Thor's love for the Disney movie.
"Why don't we just watch both? The night is still young," Yelena finally suggested from her spot by the corner of the couch.
As they continued bickering, your eyes finally caught sight of the one you'd been waiting for.
Loki walked into the living room quietly, his socked feet barely making any noise on the expensive flooring. His gaze found yours before he saw anything else in the room, and a gentle, shy smile appeared on his lips.
You'd grown very close, very fast. Loki had started seeking your presence more and more each passing day; during the mornings he'd wait for you with an extra cup of coffee in hand, during the missions it was already routine that you two were a pair, and during the night you never parted ways without him planting a kiss on your forehead first.
Never in your life had you met someone quite like him, who carried such a bruised heart and still managed to be so loving. It made you wonder if anyone had ever bothered to see how beautiful his soul was, for you had fallen in love with it before you even touched his skin.
You gently patted the vacant seat on your left side, lifting the thin blanket covering your legs so Loki could sit down, and once he did you draped part of it over his legs as well.
"What's today's punishment?" Loki smirked, making himself comfortable beside you. His shoulder flush with yours.
"Stop it, movie nights are nice. I know you secretly enjoy them too," you chuckled, bumping his knee with yours. His proximity raised goosebumps all over your skin, and if you weren't so focused on your own feelings, you would've felt how much Loki's heart was racing as well.
"I only come to these because you do too," Loki mumbled, his eyes focused on the TV and a frown appearing on his eyebrows as the first scenes from Tangled played on the screen.
Your breath caught on your throat. He had said it so casually, so easily. You wondered if he had even realized the weight of his own words. "Right," you whispered, a little breathless.
It didn't take long for the only light in the room to be the one coming from the TV. When Tangled hit the 45-minute mark, Tony was already snoring and Thor had finished two bowls of popcorn. You, however, were wide awake and fully aware of Loki's arm resting on the back of the couch. What a cliche move, you thought to yourself, your cheeks burning hot and biting back a smile.
Loki's face as he watched the movie was nothing short of comical, one would think he was watching a period drama; his lips hovering ever so slightly before he'd scoff at a musical scene, his eyes softening as the romance between Rapunzel and Flynn blossomed, the way he mindlessly played with the ends of your hair. You watched him more than you watched the movie, and you didn't miss the way he froze and gulped when you finally rested your head on his shoulder.
─── ·❆· ───
The day had started out fine; a cold yet sunny morning, your fingers brushing Loki's when he handed you your cup of coffee, no eminent trouble in the city, everything was normal and fine; until it took a turn for the worse.
You didn't hear the fight, you didn't know exactly what caused it, but you felt it immediately. Anger, hurt, and pain were suddenly heavy in the air even through the closed door of your bedroom. As soon as a shiver ran up and down your spine you got up and all but ran outside to chase the somber feeling.
The elevator doors of your floor weren't even fully open yet when Loki busted his way through them, Thor hot on his heels.
"I knew it was a mistake coming here," Loki snapped, his steps fast as he put as much distance between himself and Thor as he could, nearly running straight into you in the process.
"You know what, brother," Thor began, he had stopped walking, standing in the middle of the living room, "Maybe it really was a mistake to bring you here, you don't care about anyone but yourself, it's almost as if you enjoy hurting people, you can't help it. It'll always be like this, that's why you're better off on your own." Thor wasn't shouting, but his words rang loudly in the room; his chest heaving when he stopped speaking.
You had held your breath the entire time, gripping the back of a kitchen stool until your knuckles turned white. Thor was angry, you could feel it even without being near him, but he didn't mean what he had said, not entirely. Thor's emotions were a passing wind on your skin though, for who you really felt, stood just a few feet behind you.
Loki had his back turned to his brother when he spoke, and he didn't turn around after. Even without looking at him, you could feel the way he trembled, unsteady hands closed into tight fists to mask his hurt; he gulped back a sob, and kept on walking to his bedroom without a word.
You could choke with the amount of pain radiating off of Loki; heavy, sickening, all-encompassing pain that you felt so vividly in your skin and bones. You only shot Thor an angry glance and muttered; "Damnit Thor," before turning around hastily. You thought you heard Thor calling after you, but you decided to ignore him, your priorities already set.
You ran after Loki, catching up just before his door slammed shut. Taking a deep breath, you walked into his bedroom and softly closed the door behind you with a click.
You'd never actually been in Loki's room before, so you took a single moment to glance around. The room itself was a little bare, with only the necessities such as a double bed, a dresser, a desk, a small bookshelf, and the door that led to his bathroom. You made a mental note to gift him something to liven up his space; maybe a plant.
Loki had his back turned to you still, both his hands resting on his waist as his head hung low. But you knew he knew it was you there with him, by the simple fact that he was allowing you to stay.
The silence was a heavy one, packed with the electricity of two souls tightly holding onto each other. Loki was trying so hard to keep all his pain in control, his shoulders shaking with each breath he took; but you could feel it as if it was your own.
"Loki," you said his name in nothing but breath, testing the waters. You took half a step toward him as you fidgeted with your hands.
He didn't answer. You weren't expecting him to.
You pursed your lips before saying; "he didn't mean it," your voice was choked and took effort to come out, the back of your eyes already burning, "what Thor said. He- he didn't mean it."
A few beats passed, and then; "doesn't matter if he did." Loki's words cracked in the middle, it was the most broken you'd ever heard him sound. "He's right."
"He's not," you told him in the same heartbeat, not a tint of hesitation in your tone.
Loki turned around, his gaze finally finding yours and there were tears pooling at the bottom lid of his bright eyes. "Yes, he is," he took a single big step toward you, nearly closing the distance between you and him. Loki's lips trembled as he struggled to keep talking; "and why is it that you care? What's in it for you?"
He was hurt, and he was frustrated, and he was angry; you knew that. Still, you couldn't help but be taken aback by his question. What could he even mean by that? Did he really believe that all this time that you'd been dancing around each other's feelings, it wasn't real?
"Loki, I-" you stuttered, not knowing how to say it without baring your heart in the process. Your hesitation got Loki avoiding his eyes from yours, and you forced yourself to go on. "There's nothing 'in it for me' I just... care about you."
Still waiting for the other shoe to drop, Loki softly shook his head, scoffing. His tears were a blink away from spilling, he felt as if barbed wire was wrapped around his throat, and his heart threatened to jump from his chest and straight into your hands.
It scared him. How easily you could make his walls crumble like paper in the rain. He flinched slightly when he felt the ghost of your touch on his cheek, blinking multiple times when your thumb brushed away a single tear rolling down his cheek. You touched him as if he were porcelain, and yet it still broke him.
"Is it that hard to believe that you're important to me?" You asked then, voice nothing but a whisper in the short space separating your bodies. With your hand still holding his cheek, you forced his eyes back on yours. "You have a good heart, Loki. I just wish you could see it the way I do. I wish everyone could see it."
The crooked smile he gave you nearly made your own tears fall. "You don't know what you're talking about, you don't know what I've done," he told you quietly, more than anything, he sounded utterly defeated.
"But I do know," your free hand found one of his then, and you tangled your fingers together loosely, "I might not have been with the Avengers when you attacked New York, but I was still in New York. And I still mean it, you could tell me every single bad thing you've ever done and I'd still tell you how good you are, because I see it. Every single day, Loki. I feel you every single day, and I can feel all this-" Your words caught in your throat and you tasted your tears on your lips. "-All this pain that you carry around and you still choose to be good."
Too many emotions swam behind his eyes for you to put a finger in any of them. But tears were running freely down Loki's cheeks now, pooling against your hand resting on his cheek.
"What did you-" he tried, gasping for air as if he was underwater. This was foreign territory. You had a place in his heart no one else could ever have, he realized, and his heart was beating faster than his mind knew what to do with. "You've been prying into my emotions without me knowing?" He sounded more desperate than annoyed.
"I didn't want to," You explained quickly, "I- I never meant to, but for some reason, I can't block you out." Shrugging weakly, you slowly dropped the hand resting on his cheek, missing the way he glanced down in search of your warmth. "I tried. I really tried."
There was a vulnerability in Loki's eyes you'd never seen before. He looked at you as if he'd just realized what love is. You wondered if you mimicked the same gaze—you sure felt it.
Loki shuffled in his stance. His hand, still holding onto yours, tightened its grip. "I'm-" He avoided your eyes, looking somewhere past your shoulder, "I'm sorry you had to feel all that."
You softened at his words, shaking your head and taking another step forward until your sneakers bumped his shoes. "Wasn't your fault," you whispered.
Loki gulped back a sob after you spoke, and that was the last straw for you to let go of his hand and pull his body to yours in an embrace.
He melted into you.
Loki's fingers dug into the fabric of your shirt and he buried his head against your shoulder—you soon felt it becoming damp, yet you only hugged him tighter. With the desperation he was holding you with, you wondered when was the last time someone had held him.
The soft sobs escaping him were muffled against you. And you couldn't help but stroke his back, the tips of your fingers burying into his very soul. "I'm sorry you had to go through all of this alone." You spoke near his ear, feeling the goosebumps that raised on his skin. "You never deserved it," you promised.
You weren't sure how much time passed, you stayed there for as long as Loki needed you to. When he eventually pulled away, he didn't go far, his hands kept holding your body close to him as if he was afraid you'd leave if he let go.
His bright eyes didn't hold a storm anymore, they were more like a calm sea. A soft frown etched itself into his eyebrows, "did you… take away my pain?"
You chuckled quietly, "No, I can't take away people's emotions." You lifted a hand until your fingertips could brush the skin on his forehead, "But I can make them lighter." You traced an invisible line over his eyebrow and until you reached his cheekbone, "Make the weight just a little bit easier to carry."
Loki leaned into your touch, almost closing his eyes. His hands that rested on your back traced your spine and pulled you closer. "Darling, you've been making it easier ever since the first day I met you."
⋆* ☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚
Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are literally what keeps me motivated to continue posting here, so I’d appreciate it if you could take some time to reblog and comment. <3
You do not have permission to repost, copy, or translate my works on any platforms (even with credit), please respect.
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sergeantbarnessdoll · 5 months
Text
Best Friends » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier
Pairings: Avenger!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: Bucky and the reader have a close friendship.
Warnings: Fluff, language, flirting, hugs and kisses, cuddling, pet names (doll)
Written on my phone so sorry if there’s any mistakes or typos.
GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators.
🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵
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You quietly opened Bucky’s bedroom door, closing it behind you. You smiled when you seen Alpine sleeping on her cat tree. You quietly tip toed past the sleeping cat to Bucky’s bed.
“Good morning, Jamie! It’s morning!” You say happily as you threw yourself on his bed.
Bucky groaned, putting a pillow over his head and continued sleeping. You pouted and poked his side making his body jerk.
“What if I was sleeping naked?” Bucky asks.
“I don’t think that would stop me.” You say.
Bucky took the pillow off of his head and looked at you with a weird look on his face.
“You’re fucking weird.” He says.
“You love me!” You grinned.
“You’re right. I do.” He says.
Bucky wrapped his arms around you, pulling you on top of him and attacking you with kisses making laugh and squirm. Alpine jumped off of her cat tree and jumped on the bed to get some morning kisses. She let out a squeaky meow to get yours and Bucky’s attention.
“Aww, Alpine wants morning kisses from her daddy.” You smiled, petting her head.
Bucky leaned down to give Alpine kisses and petted her. She started purring with satisfaction.
“Let’s go get coffee!” You say.
Bucky laughed at your cuteness and got out of bed to get dressed. As he was getting dressed, you noticed one of his sweatshirts on the floor. You grabbed it and put it on without him noticing.
“Ok, doll. Are you- is that my sweatshirt?” He asks, looking at the sweatshirt of his that you’re wearing.
“Umm… no.” You lied, trying not to laugh.
“It looks better on you anyways.” He smiles.
Bucky held out his metal hand for you to hold, knowing how much you love his metal arm. You smiled and happily put your hand in his, intertwining your fingers with his metal ones. You and Bucky walked into the kitchen hand in hand.
“Morning guys!” You smiled.
“Morning, Y/N!” The Avengers say.
You sat down at the table while Bucky got you two coffee.
“Weren’t you here like 12 hours ago?” Tony asks.
“Yes.” You answered.
“Why are you here again? Don’t you ever go home?” He asks.
“Why would I go home when Bucky is here?” You smiled.
Bucky put a cup of coffee in front of you and sat down in the chair next to you, wrapping his metal arm around your shoulders.
“How the hell are you two not fucking?” Tony asks.
“Stevie! Tony said a bad word!” You say like a child while pointing at Tony.
“You’re weird.” Tony says.
You squinted your eyes at him, giving him the death glare.
“If looks could kill, you’d be dead right now.” Clint says to Tony.
“That stare is kinda creepy.” Tony says, getting up and walking away.
You giggled to yourself and took a sip of your coffee.
“I think you just scared the shit out of Stark.” Bucky laughs.
“It’s what he gets for calling me weird.” You say.
Soon after that, Bucky had to train recruits with Steve. You just hung out around the Compound while he worked. You were currently in the lounge room on your phone.
“Hey Y/N.” Peter says, walking in the room.
“Hey Peter. What’s up?” You say.
“I was wondering if you wanted to check out the new features on my web shooters.” He says.
“Hell yea!” You say excitedly.
Peter sat down next to you and showed and explained to you what his web shooter can do.
“So what you’re saying is that if I push this button, webs come out?” You asked.
“Yes. Give it a try.” Peter says.
You pushed the button and a web shot out of it. Bucky walked in the room and almost got hit by the web. You and Peter went silent.
“Sorry, Mr. Barnes.” Peter says.
Bucky didn’t say anything. He just walked up to you and picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder.
“She’s my best friend. Get your own.” Bucky says.
“Don’t be mean.” You say, playfully punching his back.
“I’ll text you later, Peter.” You say.
“No she won’t.” Bucky says, walking out of the room.
You punched him again. Bucky put you on your feet when you guys got to the hallway.
“What was all of that about, Buck?” You asked.
“Nothing.” He says.
“Wait, are you jealous that I was hanging out with someone who’s not you?” You asked with a playful smirk.
“I don’t get jealous.” Bucky says.
“Aww, you’re so jealous! The Winter Soldier is jealous!” You teased, playfully poking his stomach.
Bucky’s face turned red and he swatted your hand away making you laugh.
“I’ll stop teasing you now.” You say.
“Give me a hug and I’ll forgive you.” Bucky says.
You hugged him and kissed his stubbly cheek.
“Forgive me?” You asked.
“Yes.” He says.
“Good. Now, last one to the gym has to pay for the winner’s lunch!” You say, running towards the gym.
“Oh you’re on!” He says, running after you.
You completely forgot that he’s a Super Soldier and the serum made him run faster cause within seconds he past you and got to the gym before you. Once you got to the gym, you playfully pouted at him.
“I win!” Bucky says triumphantly 
“No fair! You have Super Soldier serum running through your veins to help you! I don’t!” You pouted, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Aww, come here.” He says, opening his arms.
You walked to him and he wrapped his around you, kissing the top of your head.
“Even though I won, I’ll still pay for your lunch.” Bucky says softly.
“Thank you, Buck.” You smiled.
“Anytime, doll.” He smiles.
🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵
-Bucky’s Doll
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natsaffection · 6 months
Note
hey love 👋👋
could you right some nsfw were r is like a ray of sunshine, always nice, kind, joyfull and a little shy, so nat is aurorised how >>loud<< they are and what they like in bed, please 🥺🥺 also, mommy nat being very teasing.
i'd really appreciate it, thank you sm sweetie 😻💖💖
Hidden | N.R
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MINORS DNI!! (18+)!
Summary: Natasha gets to know the real you.
warnings: Mommy Kink, fingering (r receiving), Strap on use (r receiving) Rough (?) sex,
Word count: 1305 k
A/N: Thank you so much for this one <3.
How grateful Natasha was. Not the fact that she got a second chance or found a new family. No, she was grateful for you.
If someone had told her that some fire in a coffee would lead to her meeting a sweet little someone like you, she would have given that person the darkest look ever.
You talked one night about how Natasha approached you, and you were so happy because you never dared to approach her yourself.
Not only did you bring a smile to Natasha's face every time, but also to her comrades. After seven months of dating, you decided to make your relationship public, and it was time to involve your friends. Since then, the Tower has been surrounded only by laughter and joy.
Someone drops their drink? No big deal, you laugh at how Steve's face was when he could feel his cup sliding out of his hand.
The power goes out again because Tony overdid it again? Don't worry, you'll be the first one in every room with candles ready to light.
Someone is sick? You're at their sides. Someone is sad? You've got tissues and Disney movies in hand.
Natasha was really lucky...Especially behind closed doors.
Damn, you have some vocal cords. And how Natasha loved it, "Gosh Detka..Now I have to ask Tony about the soundproof walls.." she said as she shoved her knuckles deep in you pussy. "I-I'm sorry..."
God, how Horny Natasha is for you..How fragile you are, how sweetly you try to escape her pleasures.
So she never would have expected the way you try to hide that you are discreetly excited by the scenes in front of you. It was Natasha's idea to watch a certain documentary for the night.
In fact, it was, but Natasha wanted to find out how far she could take you, and so now a documentary on the background of the female orgasm is playing before you.
"What's going on, Detka?" She knows what state you are in right now and wants to take it further. Only you don't like it at all. How embarrassing. Why are you..aroused?
"N-Nothing! I'm just sitting very uncomfortable..." Oh god, you have to get out of here- "Are you sure about that Y/n? It looks to me like you're enjoying yourself here..." Was she right? Do you get off on it? No, it can't-
"N-Nat?"
"Yeah, baby?" Natasha eyes widen..That look you have, she already knows from others Natasha has been with. That's why it surprises her that you, of all people, have it right now, "Um..you always said that I could..come to you, and so I wanted to ask if..you- if we-"
"You want me to be rough with you? Is that it, Malysh?" You couldn't bring yourself to say anything, so you nod frantically. You need her. Now.
And Natasha knew that too. She's on you like a gazelle, that haven't had anything to eat in a long time. With one hand she pushes you further into the bed and with the other she moves to your pants, "You don't know how much this is turning me on right now..." Fuck. You thought to yourself. Why didn't you open your mouth sooner?
As quickly as Natasha was on top of you, your clothes were on the floor and her fingers were already inside you. You groaned out and at that exact moment a groan also came from the TV you forgot to turn off, and it was followed directly by a "Mommy.."
"F-Fuck, Y/n!" You had also forgotten that Natasha's fingers were inside you and this..word tightened all your nerves in your pussy. "Mommy, huh? Do you want to call me mommy?"
"S-Stop..." You put your hands over your mouth to keep it from being more embarrassing for you, but Natasha was quick to respond and stopped you, "No, no, let me hear you. Come on, I won't hold it against you..."
Come on.. Natasha thought..She wants- no needs, to hear it. She made it her task and thus no longer held back. She rams into you full force and curled her fingers perfectly, "A-Aah, M-Moommy!!!" You both had the same reaction. Natasha had to moan out now too, "There it is..Fuck, who thought you were so dirty for me, hm?"
"Please, stop talking like that..." embarrassing, embarrassing, emb-- "N-No!!!" You were so close, so close! But Natasha pulled her fingers out and took them in her mouth. You watched her enjoy the taste of you, and when she looked back, you knew immediately that you were in for a long night.
But the spark faded when Natasha got up and went into the next room. You were puzzled and scared...Was it too much, after all? Crap, you shouldn't have-.
"I ordered this two months ago and was hoping we could use it at some point. What do you say?" She was leaning against the door with a bright pink- 9inch strap-on in her hand. You had to swallow and nodded again. "Would you turn around?" she asked and you do as she said. You now look at the wall in front of you, confused, trying to catch everything that is going on behind you.
Suddenly, you notice the bed buckling behind you and feel your lover's hands on your hips. "Tell me what you want, baby..." Natasha wants to hear you.
"Just..Fu— I-Im not gonna say this..." Natasha was already expecting an answer like that, "Okay."
You sigh out, glad that she's satisfied with that.
You take a deep breath as you suddenly feel the tip of her dildo against your folds and brace yourself, but the thrust never came. Instead, she just nudges it back and forth.
"Nat.." Natasha had to smirk. She had you where she wanted you, "What? Tell me what you want.."
"P-Put it in..." God, how sweet you sound..That's why she had to thrust in, but no more, "God, Natasha, please!!”
"You know what to do, Y/n.." she sang. Her most important person lying squirming under her and thirsty for pleasure.
And how you needed it, "Please fuck me already! Please, just- O-Ohh, yess!" Natasha was now desperate too, thrusting back and back into you with tremendous force. In, out, in, out it goes all the time and you and Natasha forgot everything. You had absolutely no backbone, "Pl-Please slow..d-down, I-" She rocks into you so hard that if she wasn't holding you by the hips, you would be constantly sliding forward,
"No..you take it, fuck..baby!"
You were starting to run out of strength in your arms, and before you fell into the pillow you suddenly noticed Natasha suddenly pull out, turn you around and fill you right back up. Her pace picked up directly, "You look so good when you're taken through..."
"PLEASE! I'm so close..so close..." You were in heaven and Natasha was close too as her thrusts become more erratic, "Look at me Y/n..I want to see you.."
You almost couldn't hear her, so fucked are you. Look at Natasha, look at Natasha, look-
"Natasha! I'm c-cumming!" She was already grunting too, "That's not my name, sweetheart.." You feel her thrusts slow down, "M-Mommy! No, don't stop, please!!"
"Then try again." She had to grit her teeth as she was about to finish as well, "Mommyyy, please let me come, please, please, please!!"
She picked up the pace again and shortly after, you both lapsed into endless release. Natasha fucked you through your orgasm, and you were sure you saw Jesus. As you both came down, Natasha laid on your chest, "That was fantastic..Who would have thought you would be so-"
"Please don't say it.." You put your hands back on your face and Natasha had to laugh,
"Oh Detka, I'm so grateful to have you.."
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Text
Life in the City 4
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Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bad friends, creep behaviour, abuse of power dynamics, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You move to the big city and find yourself swallowed up by its chaos.
Characters: Clark Kent, Thor Odinson, short!reader
Note: I think I'm addicted to thick men.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you. No tag list, do not ask for updates.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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Tuesday sees a new block in your calendar. The three hour meeting stands out in the internal calendar as its highlighted bright yellow. You don’t know where it’s come from. You’re nervous.
Have you done something wrong? Is this a firing? Does that really take three hours?
You try not to let your innate insecurity get the best of you. You click on it but the new window offers little more than the time. All participants are hidden and there’s no description aside from ‘meeting’. The only other information is the conference room number. Right, so you’re going to implode in the hour leading up to it.
You try to focus but the Excel lines are much tighter than usual. They seem to blur together as you file through a thousand different possibilities and none of them are good. What do you do if you are in trouble? If you do lose your job? You have nothing to fall back on.
You get up ten minutes from the start of the meeting. The building is still new to you and you have to check the placards on the wall to make sure you’re at the right conference room. The door is already open and you slow down as you see Tony strut through ahead of you. This definitely seems off. He’s one of the top execs…
What if it’s a mistake? What if you were added by accident? Maybe you misunderstood it. Maybe it was a notice to stay away. Oh, you’re so confused.
You enter the room and hug your notebook to your chest. The table against the far wall is arranged with trays of catering; pastries, fruits, veggies, quiche, all sorts of delights. Alongside the treats are coffee and tea and a frosty jug of water.
Tony helps himself to a cup of coffee and several tarts. Several other seats are already filled. You vaguely recognise them, not all by name, but you know they’re from various departments. You sit at the table and lay your notebook down, nervously gripping the spiral as you flick your thumb against the tip of the pen slid within.
No one else seems to notice you. They all know each other and chatter among themselves. Five including you. Not very many at all. You wait, wondering who called the meeting as no one seems in a hurry to begin.
The door clicks but you’re the only one who hears it as they rest or deep in conversation. You peek over as Thor strides to the head of the table, stopping behind the high-backed chair.
“I hope you all helped yourselves to the wonderful treats,” he smiles, “don’t mind me as I grab a few before we begin.”
He carries on to the trays and you look down at your notebook. You open it to the first blank page and slide your pen free of the coil. You wiggle it between your fingers as you wait. Surely, it can’t be disciplinary. There’s food and Tony is one of the top guys.
Thor returns, a healthy mound of sweets and fruits on his plate and a steaming cup in the other. He sits and pushes his shoulders wide, sighing as he peers up and down the table. You shrink down as you sit at the opposite end.
“Well, we are all here,” he declares, drawing the silence of the rest. They all turn their attention on him. “I think some of you already know why I’ve brought you here but we have lots of time to get filled in. We’ll be taking breaks of course but we won’t waste time, yes?”
“Yes, sir,” your voices reply out of turn.
“We will be working on a very special project. It’s big news that we’ve acquired Onyx Row and it’s all well and good to put a pretty bow on it and send out a release, but we have to handle all that background noise. We have to figure out how that works,” he explains. 
You’re almost hypnotised by his voice and the way he moves his hands as he speaks. He’s so confident and carefree. You envy him as much as you admire him.
“You have all been handpicked to take this on,” he pauses to look at each and every one of you. “We need a strong team. We’ll have new clients to take it and to retain, we’ll have new profits but new expenses as well, and we have a lot to learn about OR. We all know things are not always transparent in acquisitions.”
There’s a murmur of agreement as you stay silent. You’re still not sure you’re supposed to be here. You don’t have very much experience, just a certificate you got at the end of your degree. You chew your lip as you stare down the table, suddenly caught in the sights of another.
Thor’s blue eyes meet yours and his cheek dimples. You blanch and make yourself sit straight. You uncap your pen and quickly scribble in your notebook; Onyx Row. 
“Today’s strategy planning,” Thor says, “we’ll toss some ideas around until the first break, then after that, we’ll come up with a ladder.” He stacks his hands over and over as he talks, “figure out how we climb it. Step by step.”
There’s typing on keyboards. You regret not unhooking your laptop but your notebook’s just as good for notes. Tony leans backs as he chews a quiche, crumbs dusting down his jacket.
“Stark, why don’t you write something down, eh? You’re not here for a free meal.”
“That’s what you think,” Tony scoffs playfully but lets his chair snap straight and taps on his touch pad to wake up the laptop.
“Right then,” Thor stands, “I’ve a brief presentation to get us started before we start brainstorming.”
Your stomach swims. The displacement remains but at least you’re supposed to be there. Even if you’re not sure you’re the right choice. Everyone else in the room is a veteran and you’re just you. That’ll have to do.
Or maybe you’ll just show yourself to be a total noob.
🏙️
At the midpoint of the meeting, several new trays are added to the spread. It’s a lot for six people. You finally get up to grab a tea, steeping a bag of green in hot water, then take a small triangle of a tuna sandwich and a few pieces of fruit back to your seat. Despite the ice breakers round, you’re still shut out of the clique-like conversation of the others.
You don’t mind so much. Talk for business, nothing else. This is work. Besides, you’re so anxious you don’t know what you would say. You chalk it up as much to your own inaction as to their blatant exclusion.
The empty chair to your other side rolls back, frightening you as Thor sets down another plate of goodies and sits. You gulp and look at him as you quit your nibbling of the sandwich crust. You clear your throat and wipe your fingers on a napkin.
“Sir,” you greet with a cringing smile, “hi, er.”
“Thor will do,” he assures coolly, “are you enjoying the food?”
“Um, yeah,” you answer, trying to brighten up out of your cocoon, “it’s good.”
“Feel free to have more. There’s plenty to go around.”
“Thank you, that’s… I’m good,” you press your thumb to your index and bend and unbend your knuckle nervously.
“Tea?” He muses as he reaches to flick the small tap dangling from your cup.
“Mhm,” you nod awkwardly, “coffee burns my tum–stomach.”
He smiles broadly, “ah, mine too, but I’m stubborn.” He leans his elbow on the table, his chair turned to face you entirely, “are you nervous?”
Your eyes give you away as they widen at his blunt question. You dip your chin again, “a little. I… you know I only just started, right?”
“Yes, but you have your qualifications,” he insists.
“Yeah, uh, but…” you glance around at the others.
“But, I have faith in you. As I said, I picked every person in this room. You included. I know that new minds are as valuable as more experienced ones.”
“Well, er, thank you for taking a chance on me,” you bit your cheek and force a smile.
“You know, if no one had ever taken a chance on me, I might not be sat here with you right now,” he leans in just slightly, “everyone deserves their chance to prove themselves. I have faith in you, and what about you?”
“What about me?” Your cheeks wobble.
“Do you have faith in me?” He rests his chin in his hand, watching you intently.
“Y-yes, sir, uh, Thor,” you crackle out, “thanks, I…”
“Good,” he praises and sits up, “I’ll let you finish your food, if you don’t mind that I stay and do the same.”
He swivels the chair and picks up a cracker from his plate. You hum in acquiescence, barely able to muster words. The only permission he needs is your nervous reach for your tea. As if you would tell him to go. He’s the boss.
🏙️
You’re finally let free but you don’t feel as much. You have so much more to do now. You carry with you the folder handed out to each member of the room with an exhaustive overview of your session and the Onyx Road contract. 
You sit at your desk and take a moment to situate yourself. This is your priority. Everything else is second tier. That’s as much as Thor said but what are you going to do about Dawn breathing down your neck?
You fix the loose button on your cardigan that comes undone now and again, right at the worst spot; the middle. You pull the bottom straight and clear your throat, signing into your computer as you rejig back to work mode. 
As you shuffle through the emails you received in your absence, a figure approaches. You delete a redundant communication before you face them. You expect Dawn but instead, an all too familiar face looks down at you. Sitting, Thor seems to tower over you even more than usual. You feel like you should stand as he bends his neck to talk to you.
“I did forget to mention some things early. As you can expect, some details slip through the cracks in such a big project,” he spreads his hand on the corner of your desk.
“Oh, okay,” you grip the arms of your chair as you peer up at him.
“IT will be around to help connect to the shared drives required for the project,” Thor explains as he leans on one foot, hooking the other over it. “You will be dealing with some very important documents. Confidential so you will also need to relocate…” he looks around briefly, “you will be moved to a private office.”
“Uh, wow, that’s… okay,” you nod with a flutter of lashes.
“It’s a lot, I know, but you will be compensated. At special projects rate, no less,” he intones as he drags his hand up his suit jacket and curls his fingers around his lapel. His fingers are so thick. All of him is. And big. You’re getting vertigo just looking up at him. “You be in your new home by the end of the day.”
“Today?” You ask, almost breathless.
“Yes, we move fast around here,” he grins, “but I also wished to tell you that should you require any support, you will come to me. Your supervisor has been informed of your reassignment and your daily duties will be handed out to your colleagues for the duration of this project.”
“Uh huh,” you croak out, “that makes sense.”
“You understand, this is a big assignment. It could require late nights and… business trips.”
“Yes,” you lie. You really hadn’t considered that. In the contract you signed, it was for a desk, there was no travel, no overtime.
“Another matter for us to deal with. Travel pay, extra hours…” he drones as if bored.
“I understand,” you murmur.
He drops his hand to frame his hip, pushing back his jacket as he stays leaned against your desk. His eyes stick to you as they storm in mystery, “I like that sweater. It’s cute.”
You look down at the flower embroidery and your cheeks singe. Compared to him and the other execs, you were a touch underdressed. That’ll probably need to change too.
“Uh, yeah, I…” you fix the loose button again, “sorry, I’ll… I’ll buy a blazer.”
“I mean it,” he drags his hand from the desk and stands straight, “don’t buy the blazer, that suits you better.”
You crane your neck to look up at him again, “thanks, sir,” you fold your hands in your lap, “I… like your tie.”
You immediately want to disappear as the words trickle out. You sound so stupid. He touches his blue grey tie patterned with white paisley and examines it.
“Not one of my favourites, but thank you,” he chuckles. “Right,” he snaps his fingers, “much work to do. For both of us.” He shifts back on his sole, “don’t forget what I said, if you need anything, I’m your man.”
He winks and spins on his heel. You watch him go as tension raises your shoulders. That was awkward and painful. You’re already doubting your place in this whole thing. Before you can turn your chair back to your desk, you don’t miss the errant gazes in your direction. You ignore them as best you can but they sear into your back. You have witnesses to your humiliation, great.
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