like, listen. i know this sounds dumb cause it's literally just a character from a show but ive been having such a fucking hard time this year, i have struggled with so many things and i've lost so fucking much. this year's been hell to me and izzy was the only thing that had truly helped me through all of this. this has been the first time this year i was truly happy, excited and giddy about something. ive been struggling to find something that would cheer me up and help me as he did. being able to see him again, see him being portrayed the way i always knew him to be and to see him fit it, find love with the crew and loving them in return, seeing how well he was getting along with stede, the way i knew they would get along if he wasn't struggling so much.. i was so happy, you know? these past few weeks were the only time the whole year i could take my mind off of my own problems. the only time i could breathe a little bit and i was so thankful to be able to have him like this. he meant so fucking much to me. being able to see him get the happiness he deserved after being abused and tortured- after finally saying no to ed, after trying to kill himself when so many times throughout this past year i've been pondering on how much easier things would be for everyone, myself included, if i just wasn't here. it meant something to me, you know? it really did. all of this is just fucking unfair and dumb. everything about this is so fucking bad. i truly thought that david or whatever the fuck, saw izzy as i saw him. as someone who needed the love after being fucked over his whole life. someone who deserved happiness and kindness and being treated with love and affection after years of thinking he didn't. i do see myself in izzy on so many aspects. i've been there so many fucking times. i have been izzy and i have done things as he did and i have suffered its consequences. and i came a long way from that, although i still struggle with it. but i found love and happiness and kindness and i changed so much because of that. and i thought they could offer that to him too. that they could see him for who he is. a man who tries. a man who is stubborn, sure, but smart and so fucking good. someone who struggles with change, who tries to lock his feelings up and just deal with hell with a brave face, even if it kills him every day a little more, but someone who cares. someone who loves. someone who wants to be loved in return. even if he doesn't know how to go about it. and someone who despite all of this, deserved to be fucking happy. i really thought he meant something to them, as he means so much to so many people. this was really my last fucking straw. a good reminder that no, i do not get to feel joy, not even a tiny one, not even if through a character that i love. something as simple as that that touched me in such a beautiful way that for the first time this year, made me feel hopeful and safe and truly happy. but i guess, that's it, everyone else was right. i was on the wrong side of things. you win. good for you.
BUT IF YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH A BOY
HE'LL MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE THE WORLD IS ON YOUR SHOULDER WHEN YOU'RE HOLDING HIS HAND
THE FIRST TIME THAT YOU KISS YOU'LL SMELL LILACS ON HIS LIPS
AND WHEN YOU NEED A LITTLE SPACE YOU KNOW THAT HE'LL UNDERSTAND
i just know james freaking potter would use ANYTHING other than curse words. ducking? oh yeah! frick? you betcha! cracker barrel? better belive it! everyone would be so weirded out when “innocent” remus turned out to be a complete trashmouth and the infamous rulebreaker james was still saying H- E- double hockey sticks by 4th year
1-11 for the story asks for Cay and Trashmouth both
I WILL ALTERNATE because some are easier for Cay, some are easier for Trashmouth, and also my brain is goo.
How does your Tav advise the player character when it comes to the Dream Visitor?
Cay: I know the most obvious thing to do is blame it on tadpoles, but don't you think it's interesting that it happened right after the artifact activated? I don't think it's a coincidence, and I'm willing to trust that this Dream Visitor really is everything they claim to be. And I have to admit, I am curious to see what the tadpoles can do...
How do they advise the player character on Raphael?
Trashmouth: *sigh* Of course it had to be Raphael... Just ignore him for now, don't let him think that we're desperate. He'll string us along until the last second because he thinks it gives him the upper hand.
How do they react to Astarion biting the Player Character?
Cay: UGH, I'm so envious! Do you think he'll bite me next if I slap my neck and tell him to come get his juice? Or is that weird?
How do they react to the Player Character letting Abdirak whip them?
Cay: Ohh, I wish that was me... How come you always get to have all the fun?
Trashmouth: I'm just glad that for once, it's not me. Was it as awful as it looked?
How do they react to the Player Character taking their first tadpole power?
Cay: Well? How do you feel? What was it like? Do you have another one? You're going to share them, right?
Will they stay with the Player Character regardless of siding with the goblins or the tieflings, or is it possible for them to leave the party permanently?
Cay will stay regardless, though they will disapprove of picking the goblins. Trashmouth, being a tiefling themself, will leave the party permanently if the player sides with the goblins.
What can they be found doing at the tiefling/goblin party? Do they have comments on who the Player Character chooses to spend the night with?
Trashmouth can be found drunkenly singing and dancing with a bottle of wine in hand. If the PC comes up having chosen someone else for the night, they'll be all toothy grins and eyebrow waggles while making a lot of innuendo. If the PC insinuates they want to spend the night with Trashmouth, they will laugh nervously, make some excuse about needing to pee, then take off into the woods.
Cay hovers near Gale's tent and fidgets. If the PC is spending the night with MOST of the other companions, they congratulate them, wish them a good night, and ask for some of the PC's good luck. If the PC is spending the night with Gale, they'll sigh and give them a sad smile, then look in Gale's direction. "He really is- he's cute, isn't he? I was... I mean, I was kind of- I was hoping I could spend some time with him tonight, but... I guess not..."
If the PC expresses interest in Cay, they startle and blush. "Oh! Like- as a casual thing? Sorry- not that- I mean, you're very attractive, so it's not like I'm saying no, exactly, but I'm not really. Looking. For romance. But I would be happy to- I mean, as long as you understand that it's just casual!"
Do they have unique dialogue if the Player Character lets them die when they steal the Blood of Lathander?
Cay: Give me that mace. Give me that mace right now. I'm- You have a cleric of Lathander in your party, and you just- YOU DID NOT NEED TO DROP THE WHOLE TEMPLE ON ME, I COULD HAVE JUST- GIVE ME THE MACE-!
If you don't give them the Blood of Lathander, they will storm back to camp and refuse to rejoin the party until after one Long Rest. The disapproval hit is massive.
How do they react if the PC licks the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar?
Cay: Well.... I've put worse things in my mouth, I'm sure. Still, that's, um.... let me check you for toxins, okay?
What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?
Trashmouth: You have got to be kidding me. There's only room on that stage for one clown, and I don't like to share the spotlight.