Trials of Apollo incorrect quotes
part 3 :)
Apollo: I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than fuck
Arrow of Dodona: Here's some advice
Apollo: I didn't ask for any
Arrow of dodona: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who can talk to me
Will, tending to Apollos wounds: How would you rate your pain?
Apollo: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.
Meg A: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase.
Apollo: Meg, that's a coma.
Meg: Sounds festive.
Reyna, driving Meg and Apollo: So how was your day?
Apollo: We almost got surprise adopted!
Reyna: What?
Meg: We almost got kidnapped.
Reyna: Oh, okay.
Reyna: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!
Meg: You love me, right, Apollo?
Apollo: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like Apollo*
Apollo: Okay, are you like BLIND? You look nothing like me. First off, I'm way taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and I've been told I'm a constant 10.
Leo: What’s up guys? I’m back.
Literally everyone at camp halfblood: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. We literally saw you die.
Leo A: Death is a social construct
Apollo: How do I deal with my enemies?
Meg: Kill them
Apollo: That's a bit extreme, I was hoping for a more passive solution
Meg: Kill them only a little?
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Thalia: "You know what really gets my goat?"
Leo: "El chupacabra."
Thalia: "...No."
Reyna: "That reminds me, my mind was recently blown when I found out I'm older than its legend."
Will: "...Pardon?"
Leo: "The rumours about el chupacabra first started in March 1995."
Hazel: *excited to finally get a chance to use modern time terminology* "El chupacabra is a millennial?"
Nico: "..Are we sure it's not a monster in disguise?"
Piper: "...Leo, Reyna, Will, and I will start asking around. Which part of Mexico did the legend originate in?"
Leo: "Don't look at me!!"
Will: "I'm a Colombian who was born in Texas, so I know even less about it than you, Leo."
Reyna: "I'm a Puerto Rican who spent half my life either at Circe's island or Camp Jupiter. I have no idea where to start looking."
Piper: "slaps her own forehead* "Lets just look it up on the Internet!!"
Reyna, Thalia, Hazel, & Nico:: "What's the Internet?"
Will, Leo, & Piper: *gapes in horror*
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hello, a request please, from apollo x readerposeidon, how does apollo react if hermes tries to flirt with his girlfriend reader (hermes just wants to bother his older brother)
• this is a message for THAT nereid!
— apollo x daughter of poseidon!reader
warnings: none
a/n: Hi baby. here's your apollo crew being jealous there's nothing more like him than that.
✷
Apollo started biting his nails as soon as he heard your laughter echoing in his dining room, which he found stupid because it was HIS dining room and you were laughing with another guy right in his face. Well, it was not just another guy, it was his brother, which made it a million times worse.
His visits used to be enjoyable, now not so much.
— So, ¿what do you say? — Hermes asked, winking at you, and Apollo wondered about the sudden need to make his life miserable by looking you in that way.
Your lips painted another smile as you playfully shook your head, glancing sideways at your boyfriend, who was struggling not to throw the vase at his brother's face. Honestly, it amused you. “This is for all the times you let that Nereid flirt with you in front of me,” you thought, it was your perfect revenge, and with his brother willing to play along, they were hitting the nail on the head.
— Hmm. What do you say, darling? We can stay in that house for the summer. It's close to the water, and I think it would help me train while waiting for the swimming tryouts.
Apollo forced a smile and nodded silently, if he spoke, he'd surely yell. Hermes played with the crystal glass and leaned slightly towards you.
— Even if my brother can't be with you all the time, you can go on your own — he said, looking at his brother, pretending to be kind, and Apollo felt his blood boil. — I'll keep an eye on her for you, brother.
Apollo scoffed — I don't want you keeping any eye on my girlfriend, thanks.
The double entendre floated between you, and you pressed your lips together, trying not to smile.
Hermes ran his hand through his black curls while making loops with his hand, trying to find words to elaborate. That was exasperating, Apollo thought he was just trying to look dashing. For his misfortune, his brother kept talking.
— I think it'll be fine, she needs it for her training, after all, right? — He turned to you with the blue eyes that every son of Zeus seemed to possess. — Although, they should fear you from now on, doll.
Apollo choked at that word and drew both of your attention.
— Is everything alright, Apollo? — Hermes smiled maliciously, and the sun god remembered the stupid rule that whoever gets angry first loses.
— Nothing — Apollo replied, snapping his fingers to start the music. maybe breaking that stupid tension.
When “The Girl Is Mine” by Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney started, you were close to crack up. You couldn’t believe him.
— I love this song, little bro — Hermes hummed while drumming his fingers on the glass table, passing over the message on purpose.
“'Little bro'? I'm the older one,” Apollo thought, annoyed. He couldn't wait to kick that idiot out of his mansion.
The part with the ex-beatle began, and the messenger of the gods leaned closer and starting to sing to you.
— I love you more than he… — Hermes winked at you.
— Okay, enough — Apollo exclaimed, standing up and covering his brother's mouth with his hand. He kept singing even as his voice died in your boyfriend's palms.
Apollo growled and shot you a furious look before disappearing with him in a golden dust.
As you were left alone in the dining room, you burst into laughter and took a sip of water, impressed by your brother-in-law's performance.
Footsteps echoed in the hallway, and you masked your smile with a serious expression.
Apollo dusted off his hands and sat back down, his eyes fixed in the center of the table. You cleared your throat and casually propped one leg up on the chair, playing with your hair as you listened to him rant.
— And tell me, my love —your voice echoed through the palace vaults, — how does it feel? — In the midst of those emotions that had him on the edge of a psychotic episode, that question caught him off guard. You raised your eyebrows sanctimoniously and smiled smugly.
Oh.
— You! — He pointed at you accusingly, and you ran off giggling.
As he tried to catch up with you, he heard the echoes of the palace bringing the reason you played along with his brother's stupid game: “Tell that damn Nereid to screw off, you're mine!” And the brake on his heels, now fearing you'd walk back to him.
Okay, you won. Definitely, Apollo wouldn't even talk to a rock if it kept you from flirting with his brother again.
✷
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