Diego *discussing with Five the different messages behind Disney movies*: Bambi?
Five: Men is dangerous.
Diego *getting more frustrated*: Pocahontas?
Five: White men is dangerous.
Diego: SLEEPING BEAUTY????
Five: Well, now we’re back to the lack of consent with sleeping women.
Diego: IT WAS TO LIFT THE CURSE!!!
Police Officer: Turn around
Klaus: Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you’re never comin’ round
Police Officer: TURN AROUND
Klaus: Every now an-
dave: are you asking me on a date
klaus: I AM NOT YOUR WHORE!
klaus: BUT yes i am asking you on a date
need i say more?
klaus: *pushing ben into the road*
klaus: dont get run over STUPID
grace: so what would you want to eat, dearest children?
young klaus: waffles please
young ben: eggs would be nice!
five: maybe we can get some donuts and coffee?
young diego: i just want to serve some justice
grace: i‘ll just make waffles then!
i haven’t seen anyone do this yet but as popularity grows with the umbrella academy i feel like it should be said.
please don’t sexualize five until he is physically over 18 thank you goodnight.
Klaus energy be like:
someone: damn who hurt you???
the hargreeves kids:
Diego: I only have one policy: talk shit, get hit. Understood?
Diego: [punches Luther square in the face]
Allison: Oh my god, Diego! What the hell?
Luther: [holding his bloody nose] Jesus, how was I talking shit when I was just going to agree with you?!
Diego: I just added a second policy, [points at Luther] you exist, you get the fist.
Ben: when I said “bring me back something from the beach” I meant, like, a shell
Klaus, struggling to hold a seagull: well, you didn’t specify that
Diego trying to convince Patch to try things his way:
Literally all of the Hargreeves children:
Diego : guys, what colour is Luther’s coat?
Everyone : gray
Diego : now tell them what colour YOU think it is
Klaus : *quietly* dark white