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#tua luther
ednshtn · 2 years
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Sparrow!Ben: I HATE ALL YOU PEOPLE! ALL OF YOU!
The others: *Doesn’t invite him to the bachelor party*
Sparrow!Ben:
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Poor baby
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Klaus is the type of person who’d show up at his own funeral, see everybody crying, start crying too, and ask who died.
and then probably Luther or Diego would be crying so much they wouldn’t realise Klaus is there and just answer “Klaus”
and then Klaus would hug them and mourn himself w them probably without even realising he’s the Klaus who died until Five realises Klaus is there and alive and start cursing him.
and Luther would be like “Five stop cursing Klaus, he’s dead”
and Klaus would be like “who, me? wait, i’m the dead Klaus? oh no, i’m here, did I forget to mention? i’m immortal, sillies”
and Five would be FUCKING PISSED at him
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humuhgod · 2 years
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hi im all for klaus jus knowin the weirdest useful shit
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mediocreomen · 2 years
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still can’t believe how Luther went from ‘I’m in charge, listen to ME !!!!!’ to ‘oh haha no one listens to me, can I have some almond butter?’ like the CHANGE
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thehargreevesfamily · 3 months
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Diego: The great thing about apologies is that you don’t have to mean them
Diego: You know, I lie and tell Luther I’m sorry all the time
Luther: *glares at him*
Diego: I’m sorry
Diego: See?
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liagazed · 2 years
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𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬 , 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬 ; 𝒇. 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒔
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summary: five and (y/n) decided to "chat" in the bathroom after coming back from the 1960s timeline.
tags: five x gn!reader. makeout session. kind of fluffy. 15+. implication of smut, but no actual sexual intercourse. takes place in the beginning of season three.
a/n: i wrote this at 5am while sleep deprived, i'm sorry if it's weird
word count: 1.4k
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April 3rd. It was the day after coming back to your designated timeline. Well, not exactly.
Either way, you and Five's dysfunctional family needed a break after trying to save the world from coming to an end twice in the span of a month. But mainly you and Five, after enduring years of torture from the spending time– forty five years–  in the apocalypse and the commision. So for the 58 year old teenagers, a break was very well deserved.
Everyone else was sleeping, so Five decided to take you to the bathroom to "chat".
He'd closed the door, locking it, and kissed you softly, and you obviously kissed back. The kiss was sweet and passionate, becoming slower and more heated as Five pressed you against the counter gently. His hands roamed your back and sides, eventually landing on your waist. You'd situated your hands on his shoulders, already moving a hand to fiddle with the hair on the nape of his neck.
Five slowly lowered his hands, positioning them on the back of your thighs as he brought your body closer to his, away from the counter.
"Jump." He mumbled against your lips, and you obliged. You wrapped either of your legs around his waist, Five gripping your thighs a little harsher to hold you tighter and sit you down on the empty space on the counter he had cleared prior to your visit from your own room.
Five pulled away from your lips the slightest bit, admiring you as he did. "Missed you." He flashed you a breathless smirk. 
"We were separated by rooms for a couple of hours, Five." You responded, a hand making its way up to Five's hair, messing with already disheveled hair at the top. 
"That's way too long." Five replied, pressing his lips against yours harsher than before, causing you to be taken aback a little bit, kissing back afterwards. 
"Fuck, you're so perfect, you know that?" Five mumbled against your lips as he tilted his head to the side a little, deepening the kiss, his hands sliding under your shirt to rest on your bare waist.
You let out a muffled moan into Five's mouth, slowly pulling away to retrieve a hand from his neck and bring it to your mouth, covering it in embarrassment. 
"Did you just–" Five asked, his eyebrows furrowing a little. "I might've" you replied, sounding muffled. Five just chuckled in response. "You're cute." Five removed your hand and replaced it with his lips, kissing your cheeks and forehead as well.
"Thanks," you mumbled with a shy smile, a roseate shade dusting your cheeks as you watched Five smile at you, a soft and endearing smile that could melt the hearts of anyone within a hundred feet from here.
Five was quick to bring his lips back to yours shortly after, but more gentle. This time, he let you lead him on, whether to carry on with your session, or to just go to sleep. You obviously wanted more, so kissed back harshly, a devilish grin now being plastered on Five's face, which you could feel against your lips.
Five got carried away, letting his tongue slip into your mouth, causing you to grip onto his hair tighter. He pulled away for a second, catching his breath as he did.
Five didn't hesitate to pull you back in for a kiss as soon as he could. You kissed back with the same amount of pressure he did, causing him to grip your waist tighter and pull himself closer to you. He placed a hand flat on your back under your shirt, rubbing small circles onto your back gently. 
"My pretty baby." He murmured against your lips, your stomach tossing and turning as if it were a gymnast.
Five moved his free hand to rest on your thigh, gripping it slightly as he hovered over you a little. 
Five pulled away slightly and admired you. He watched your every move as you pant in an attempt to catch your breath. 
Five's lips find their way to your jaw, leaving a trail of kisses from there to behind your ear, which he knew was one of your weak spots. "Oh, God, Five." You let out a quiet moan as he smirked against your skin, trailing kisses down your neck, marking the territory as his.
"Y-you're gonna leave marks," you whimpered under him, your hand massaging his scalp as you did, causing him to groan slightly.
"Good. You'd look so pretty with my marks on your neck, sweetheart." Five mumbled into your skin, leaving a deep, crimson bruise on your neck that he soothed with his tongue. He admired his work with a grin, continuing to leave a trail of sloppy kisses down your neck.
You fumbled with the hem of his button-up pyjama shirt as he kissed his way back up your neck, eyes meeting with yours once he was done. 
He placed a hand on your cheek, the other on your waist as he flashed a soft grin again. That damned grin. "I'm glad that since we're officially retired, we can do this now." He said as he leaned forward and planted a kiss on your forehead. "Yeah, me too." You replied, glancing at his lips when you did. Five smirked at that and began to kiss you once more.
Jeez, do you ever get tired?
You kissed Five hard, grabbing his collar to pull him closer. He grabbed your hips and pulled them closer to his own, shifting a little in front of you.
You fumbled with the first button on his shirt, undoing it, along with the second one. Five messed with the waistband of your pants, slightly moving it down. You grinned into Five's mouth, thinking you were about to have the time of your life, until–-
"HEY!" you and Five both got startled with the machine gun knocking at the door. "FIVE, GET OUT, I HAVE TO TAKE A SHIT!" someone yelled. It was Diego. "AND I AIN'T USING NATURE'S BATHROOM!"
"WE'RE BUSY, COME BACK LATER," Five responded as he continued to kiss you slowly, a low, delighted hum being released against your lips.
"We're– IS (Y/N) IN THERE?" Diego asked loudly once again, but this time, you heard groans coming from Klaus and Luther, so you chuckled to yourself as you pulled away from Five's lips. "Yeah, I am." You smiled as you turned your head to face the door, causing Five to pout at you.
"STOP SCREWING, AND GET OUT SO I CAN PISS!" Diego yelled, knocking at the door maniacally again.
"We AREN'T SCREWING!" Five replied. "We were about to," Five smirked at you, "But you interrupted us!" 
"Ew, gross, just get out." Diego retorted in disgust, rattling the door knob.
"Why must you be so loud? It's two am!" you heard Luther let out a muffled groan.
"Let them fuck in the bathroom, use the outside one, it's not all that bad" Klaus replied. "Let them be horndogs!"
"No! They can be horndogs later, I have to shit!" Diego rattled the door knob harder then before.
"Okay, okay, fine, we're going." You aforementioned rapidly, looking Five in the eyes, then his lips, and back to his eyes.
Five's annoyed expression softened once he looked at you. "We can continue this later, my love," he spoke softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips.
Five helped you off of the counter, readjusting your clothes after and fixing your hair, along with Five's. You both stood in front of the mirror as you fixed yourselves, Five buttoning his shirt again as you straightened out your clothes, Five sending you a wink as you got composed, causing you to smile and blush.
You unlocked the door and opened it, eyes being met with an unhappy Wish™ version of batman, Diego fuckin' Hargreeves, who had interrupted your time with Five Hargreeves.
"Good morning, pendejo." You said, standing in the doorway as Five stood behind you, wrapping an arm around your waist.
"Yeah, yeah, get out– is that a hickey?" He asked as he pointed to the mark on your neck Five had made. You were quick to cover the mark, Five smirking as you did. 
"Nope, go take your shit." you walked off as you pushed Diego into the bathroom. "It is a hickey." Five whispered with a devilish grin as Diego walked in, shaking his head as he shut the door and locked it.
You and Five walked away from the door frame and stood elsewhere in the room, Five wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his head on your shoulder. "Let's go to sleep, shall we?" He murmured softly against your skin, placing a gentle kiss on your hickey. "We can continue that later, sweetheart." Five whispered into your ear, kissing the shell of it gently, sending shivers down your spine.
"O-okay." You chuckled nervously. ❦︎
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a/n pt. 2:
Have a good day idiots, ily <3
- vee ☕
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im3x80 · 7 months
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"Luther's got a point, you should get out"
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Diego: alright, emergency family meeting, Five "went to get ice cream"
Allison: and why is this an emergency
Diego: last time he just "went to go do something" the donut shop got shot up!
Klaus: he has a good point
Luther: do you really think he's going to kill somebody?
Diego: that's what I'm trying to figure out
Five, blinking in: alright what's going on why are you all standing in a circle
Diego: ... Is that ice cream?
Five: congratulations Diego, you have the object recognition skills of a child
Luther: so you didn't kill anyone
Five: for the love of God- why do you think I was going out to kill someone??
Klaus: you were an assassin
Allison: and you did kill all those people at the donut shop
Diego: and the board of directors
Five: I didn't kill anyone!
Diego: Okay okay...
Diego: hey, can I have some-
Five: eat shit and die
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eddies-guitar13 · 1 year
Conversation
Five: *Accidentally hits Klaus in the face*
Five: *Trying to decide between saying 'I’m fucking sorry' and 'Are you okay'*
Five: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!
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bitchout · 2 years
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Ok yeah everyone in TUA is traumatised beyond recovery but I guess everyone is still underestimating the fact that Five has a literal imaginary girlfriend he’s desperately in love with and might never get over from…
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neverkhushionlygham · 2 years
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Viktor Hargreeves experiencing gender euphoria and brotherly love while the world is ending (again) :
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veliana7 · 1 year
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Viktor: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.
Viktor: Violently practices.
Ben: Violently studies.
Klaus: Violently sleeps.
Allison: Violently shoots pictures.
Diego: Violently boxes.
Five: Violently murders people.
Luther: Violently worries about the previous statement.
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cantpickafandomtbh · 10 months
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So my parents and one of my friends were like “well the umbrella academy is kind of repetitive” but like… that’s the point???
Like the show is supposed to be apocalypse after apocalypse, or we wouldn’t have Five running around screaming “I CANT CATCH A BREAK WHYYY” and all the other siblings being like “yeah, whatever, oh well, guess we’ll die then”
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dazed-poltergeist · 6 months
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Wanted to practice drawing the Hargreeves siblings from the Umbrella Academy and this was the first thing I ended up drawing-- I couldn't get the scene (the quote more specifically) out of my head
I'm proud of how this one came out because I didn't make the head round as fuck for once!! v
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thehargreevesfamily · 2 months
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Klaus: If you water water, it grows. Luther: ...What. Diego: They've got a point.
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starryeyedspaceboy · 2 years
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as a Luther stannie since the beginning, here's a list of things we learnt about him in season 3 that I like
fell for a scam email at some point
used to play with Viktor's action figures and hold weddings for them
makes mixtapes
confirmation that he just straight up lost his mind on the moon
that he took a small bit of moon rock and made it into a ring (and kept on his person this entire time???)
maybe this is just a me thing, but the moon flashback also showed that he is hairy...all over his body down to his ankles (I haven't watched s1 in ages so maybe that was shown before but eh)
writing 'love Luther' on his packages back to earth and scribbling out 'love'
kept a little photo of him + his siblings on the moon base!!
Klaus calls him Lulu!!!
apparently really likes nut (cashew?) butter
not something we learnt but basically every interaction he had with Viktor the whole season, including arguing with him that his ass looked good in his suit
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