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#tua s2
dasloddl · 4 months
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thehandl3r · 2 years
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The umbrella academy’s slogan and life philosophy:
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itstheghostofmypast · 2 years
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*Hargreeves at Eliot's in the 60s*
Five: Care to explain?
*Y/N covered in blood*
Y/N: Uh...I started my period?
*horrified Diego pointing at the ax in her hand*
Five: As long as it was productive, I don't really care.
Y/N: I got you a briefcase~(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*。*♡
Five: I love you.
Diego:NO BAD CHILDREN, BLOODBATHS ARE BAD
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bisexuallilapitts · 1 year
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Klaus Hargreeves + text posts
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finalgowrl · 1 month
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i know i said im taking a break but !!!
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my favorite dysfunctional family is back august 8th 🖤☂️
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stephsageek · 6 months
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"I did what I had to for my family"
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Love how Five had a growth spurt and aged half a fucking decade in the 0.5 seconds between seasons. Kid's got game.
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0bl1v1on · 1 year
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PLEASE never let Five Hargreeves find out about irish coffee that man would go BALLISTIC if he does
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m4nd0l0r · 2 years
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Angelic Lips.
Description: A fixation bleeds through him: he catches himself always glancing by.
Ship: Five Hargreeves x GN! Reader
Word Count: 860+ (this is more of a drabble tbh-)
Author’s Note: writer’s block is a bitch and i fought it off with horniness so ig this is a lime (or lemon/smut?? genuinely idk)— i mean it deals with mouths, making out and what i thought oral fixation meant before taking a google search at 1am and becoming so aghast (basically i thought it was a mouth fetish or smth rather than a keen liking to biting and sucking cos of childhood shenanigans—) so it seems accurate, this also is just pure filth n’ brain rot of five, with that said i hope you enjoy reading and pls interact for a little boosting!! <33 (i’ll be posting more five content soon once i get a little more inspo/motivation!!!)
(Five’s body is aged up, and his consciousness ranges from 25 to 50 in my works for him from now on— However you decided which age you want for your experience/comfort!!)
Five Taglist: @ells-graveyard @noahspector @aelinismyqueen @sunweee @fivelegance @ne0boss @twauna00 @placidpluto @eichenhouseproperty @heartsforsuyin @ghostlywavelengths @ghostlycherryblossomwonderland @seconds-not-decades @coolcatlover4 @emotionally-unstabel @peachy-wolfhard @its-loki-bitch @raven-fandomtrash @theilliterateskankula @magicstrange @venusrambles @whereintheworldisspencerreid @honeycombdumbass @kazuive @oscarisaacsleftballsack @zenithinthebin @peachteeaaa @rchaoz @wickedmystery @wordsandnerds @umbrellatte @666abby6666 @iameddiemunsonshair @starlightinhumanform @vennythearsonist @trashmouthsahra @crinklypink @halfumbrella (if you want to be removed/added, pls tell me via pm!!)
This started all because of your damn mouth.
Five keeps, no- always finds himself watching. He feels as if he can’t turn away- that it pulls him back into this tight spot he can’t crawl out of. 
And he never tries to get out. 
Half of the time, he was sure you’ve catched him looking— it wouldn’t surprise him if you have. He feels- knows that he was too obvious, that he was becoming so perverted- that his eyes shouldn’t dare to look at you ever again. 
And yet each time he can- he dares. He feels vulgar, as if he has sinned, but when he sees your lips quirk up into a smile, your canines, molars form a smile that you think shows a little too much gum to the point you try to hide it— he likes it- he can’t help but look. 
He looks at you as if he’s seen an angel. 
His eyes travel down to the curve of your lips- noticing your cupid’s bow accentuating the shape. He takes in every smile, every frown, every time your mouth gaped open and shifted close. How it flattens as you purse your mouth out of frustration. 
He likes how red— angelic, your lips are— how soft it is when you kiss him- when you leave crimson kiss marks on his cheek- neck— even in his own mouth, he loves it. 
It always starts small- so sudden at first. A stolen moment in time, you both grasp unto it. 
His face pressed up on your cheek, and he breathes. He draws you in- the scent of laundry and other sorts of chemicals flood his senses- but it sets him a reminder- to know again that he was not dreaming. 
That he was not creative enough to imagine you and your lips right next to his.
He plants a kiss— it was almost.. sweet- unlike the bitterness of cold coffee, the same one he loves to take in- much to your disdain. It was one that lingers through your skin like a spark. His fingers hold you near, and you could feel the desperation for closeness through his palms.
You push back, returning the gentleness. And yet he strays away, making you want to chase him but he comes back for more— like a starving man- knowing the pleasure is finally in his reach— the desperation clings as his lips push in- His lips smile against yours as he takes you in, his tongue on yours, teeth clashing. 
His viridescent eyes watches you, the glint in his look could eat you alive- consume you like fire to wood- turning your vigor into smoke— it was obscene- your chest felt stuffy as you could feel his heart beat so furiously just inches away from your own. 
His fingers tracing over your hip bone up to your sides. Your hands hold on his upper arms— his again on your hips- sliding across your back, his thumb rubbing shapes, leaving feathered caresses down your spine. 
You were aflamed- burning under his touch, his skin— his lips trailing down your neck- his weight pressing onto your body, molding you both like clay risen from the earth’s mass ever so perfectly. 
You both needed to breathe— gasping unto each other- But if he were to pull away, he’d feel as if he stopped being alive— that he couldn’t be away. He wants- needs to further feel you- taste you. His hands grabbing you everywhere- his tongue briefly touching your lower lip— he breathes, takes you in like the air he lacks itself. 
“Five— Five, shit—“ Left your swelling lips. He only rasps ‘fuck’ before wrestling away, letting your blood rush somewhere else- not on your cheeks- your lips— the crimson merely pumps swiftly in your chest- adrenaline swimming in your veins. 
Silence fills the space between you. As you breathe in and out, hands on the sides of his arms— all he does is stare at your red lips- all swollen up, glistening with a vermillion glow, because of him. 
It was tantalizing.
Impulsivity floods his thinking: and he is a drowning man.
“Open your mouth.” His voice strungs you out of your daze— making you blink. It surprises him too- he shouldn’t.
And yet. 
You slowly part your lips— his thumb coaxes you, further separating them. Your pupils watch him as he finds himself staring on the inside of your mouth. All teeth and gum- supple skin— Enough of that, he tells himself.
There was no point in this- he knows how you feel— how you taste- what was the point of checking the source? But he continues- an urge sinks in deep his fingertips— it was not enough. 
“Wider.” 
His knee shifts, now resting between your thighs- he jerks his clothed thigh up, causing you to let out a small throaty gasp. He only takes this opportunity- slipping his finger in. And just as he was about to move away— He felt your tongue slide on the pad of his thumb and your lips quirk into a mischievous smile. 
He only broadens his shit grinning grin even further. 
“Atta, angel.”
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hargreeves06 · 1 year
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I’m gonna miss them a lot 🥺🖤
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c0ffeeb1ack · 1 year
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every couple of months, out of the blue, i think of the sheer euphoria i experienced the first time watching that scene in tua s2 where ben in klaus's body quotes the first couple lines of "everybody" by the backstreet boys and as soon as he runs off the song starts playing in the background
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parkersbliss · 2 years
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can you do 31 33 and 50 with five?
Bitter Half | F. Hargreeves
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pairing: five hargreeves x fem!reader
wc; 800ish
warnings: blood?
synopsis: five couldn’t be selfish even for the sake of his own life
requests: CLOSED
prompts: 031: “Just shut up and kiss me.”
033: “How much did you hear?”
050: “Need cuddles.”
Masterlist | Taglist | Prompt list 
Fear.
That’s all you could feel.
“Somebody help him!” You shouted, dropping down to his side. You pull back his shirt to find blood staining his skin and his face an unnatural pale color.
“Five!” You shout, cupping his face with your hands. “Why wouldn’t you say something? Are you insane?”
“Sorry, pretty girl, but you have to keep going… so close,” He whispers before passing out.
“Five!” You continue to shout. “We need to get help!” You said, spinning to face Allison and Diego. They both nod, helping to pick him up and take him back to the car.
You lay his head on your lap as the other two get in the front and begin to drive. You run your anxious hands through his hair, feeling them shake as he gets paler by the second. Stupid Five and his god complex, his need to save the world. For once, he could just put himself first. You swear Five stresses you out more than any other person you’ve met. And yet, in that stress, you found comfort in him. He was the one person you felt safe with, the person you trusted with your life.
He was like your better (maybe bitter) half.
“You’re gonna be okay, Five,” You whisper, though you’re not sure who you’re trying to convince more, him or yourself.
When you get back to the Academy, Allison and Diego carry him in as you look for Grace.
“We should’ve taken him to the hospital,” Allison said.
“A kid with a shrapnel wound might raise some questions.”
“Yeah, well, so does the shrine in Harold Jenkins's attic,” Allison quips back.
“Guys!” You scream, waving at the boy. “Five?”
“Grace!” Diego calls out, searching for his mom. She rounds a corner smiling at Diego, who points towards Five, she nods, taking him from Allison, and you follow her upstairs.
Grace sets the boy down on the bed softly as you grab a chair and sit in the corner, trying not to disturb her work. The whole time your knee bounces with fear as you stare at him.
He actually looks peaceful when he sleeps.
When Grace finishes up, she smiles at you, squeezing your shoulder and reassuring you before stepping out and offering you some privacy.
You’re grateful for that because you had a lot to say to the unconscious boy.
You pull your seat closer to him, grabbing his hand and softly kissing it. “You’re an idiot, you know,” You start. “Would it kill you to be selfish just once? You’re just so… annoying! You run around trying to save everyone but yourself. What happens if that gets you killed? Then what? And I don’t want to hear that ‘I’ve lived a long life’ bullshit. I think… I think we deserve a long life together. I deserve to get to wake up with you every morning and make fun of your coffee addiction and… and love you.”
You sigh, squeezing his hand and blinking away the tears. It was weird admitting how you felt towards the bitter old man. You were sure the only person he loved was Delores anyway. Which was why it’s good he passed out.
“I guess what I’m trying to say is if I’m going to keep having these stupid feelings for you, you gotta stop getting yourself shot at. Or I’ll shoot you myself.”
“You go on about me not dying and then threaten to kill me?” A voice chuckles. “Kind of thrown for a loop here. Which one do you want?”
Your breath hitches in your throat when you see a pair of green eyes set on yours. “You’re awake!”
You wrap your arms around the boy, careful of his wound, while also trying to pull him as close to you as possible. He responds just the same, wrapping an arm around you.
But then you pull back with wide eyes. “How much did you hear?”
Five just shrugs with a mischievous grin. “Oh, I don’t know. I really liked the part about living a long life together and coffee addiction, oh, and—”
You cut him off with a flushed face. “I get it! Just… shut up and kiss me.”
Five’s hand is quick to find the back of your neck, pulling you closer as your lips meet in a tender kiss. Your hands cup his cheek as you press against him. He tastes like coffee, which you expected, but you could grow to like coffee if it’s like this.
He pulls back before going in for one more sweet peck and then lays back on the bed. His green eyes trace your face, and you feel embarrassed under his gaze.
“What?” You ask with a light scoff.
“Nothing,” He says. “Need cuddles.”
His hand finds yours, bringing you back towards him, and you let him pull you into his chest. His arm wraps around your shoulder as you lean your head on him with a content sigh.
“I promise to stop almost getting shot at,” Five says.
“Go—”
“After the apocalypse.”
You don’t bother arguing with him, considering you’d be dead whether he did this or not. Instead, you press a kiss to his neck. “Okay.”
He hums, pressing his own kiss to your forehead. “And then you can shoot at me all you want.”
“Even better deal.”
“Yeah, I figured you’d like that one, pretty girl.”
“Only when it comes to you, pretty boy.”
— END —
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thehandl3r · 2 years
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The Handler: I’m writing my autobiography. Any tips?
Five: Kill off the main character.
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itstheghostofmypast · 2 years
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*Eliot's place*
Y/N: and that is why we should get a pet.
Five sighing: for the 10th time, we are not using a dog to fuel your fantasy of a time traveling couple with their pet.
Y/N points at Luther: BUT WE TAKE HIM ALONG!
Five: Isn't a choice though, now is it, darlin?
Y/N grumbling and walking away: can't believe the ape stays and not a puppy.
Five smiling to himself: cute
Luther: 👁️👁️ CuTe? i fEeL violated!
Five: Well, that sounds like a you problem- have a banana or somethin' *blinks away*.
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bisexuallilapitts · 2 years
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Klaus + Lila parallels
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The Umbrella Academy as textposts 3/?
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