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monako-jinn-stories · 2 years

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Mace Windu X Fem!Reader FanFic

Indulge Me for Tonight

This was a request by the lovely @kingsoukoku I had a lot of fun exploring writing for Mace! I hope I did his character justice

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Indulge Me for Life a part 2

Warnings:

NSFW, smut, 18+, p in v sex, fingering fem receiving, mutual masturbation

Fancy clothes. Fancy drinks. Fancy food. Things you aren’t used to, and quite preferably things you don’t want to be used to. The life of a Jedi isn’t a fancy one, so you don’t think you’ll be missing out on much anyway. Besides, fancy things are for politicians, something you definitely don’t want to be.

You look around the room, taking in the oddity of the event. It wasn’t a regular occurrence for a newly Knighted Jedi to have a celebration to mark the occasion, but in the midst of a harrowing war, any cause of celebration is reason enough to throw on dresses and share a few drinks, if only to distract one’s mind for the night.

“Ah, you look lovely this evening, my Padawan.” The familiar voice of your former Jedi master, Agen Kolar, floats over to your ears over the symphonic band. You turn with a smirk and make sure the Zabrak catches the way your eyes roll.

“I’m not a Padawan anymore, Agen. That is what we’re celebrating tonight, is it not?” you ask, raising the glass he offered you to your lips. He just lets out a chuckle, taking a sip from his own glass before responding.

“Even if you pass a million more trials, you will always be my Padawan,” he says, and it’s a warm comment, one to assure you that he will always be there for you. You just smile a bit wider in response. Your master always did have a way of making you feel safe and loved, even in the darkest and loneliest of times. But he isn’t the only one who has that ability, no, there is another man who has, in recent years, shown to be there for you whenever you need him.

And as if you’ve developed a sense for him, you turn to look at the entrance the moment he walks in. Agen notices your action and glances himself, pushing away the conflicted thoughts that swirl to the front of his mind. Instead, he smirks, nudging you slightly.

“Don’t be too obvious, there’s lots of higher up Jedi here,” he says, and you give him a skeptical look.

“As if you’re not a higher up Jedi, or Mace himself.”

“True, but I’ve chosen to look the other way while he…entertains the idea of your connection. The others may not be so kind.”

“I know, but I don’t really care,” you shrug. “You already know my full dedication isn’t to the Order, it’s to what I believe is right.”

“I know, but again, others may not be as accepting of this.”

“Then all I ask is that I be the sole person punished, as Mace does not deserve to have his image dampened by me and my desires,” you reply, and your former master holds your gaze for a second before his eyes wander away.

“Enjoy your night, my Padawan. Be wary of what I have warned, I do not wish to lose you,” he says before he moves away. Your eyes follow him before they catch on another figure. Your heart skips a beat, like it always does, when your eyes lock with his. He nods towards you, something sparkling in his eyes as he raises his glass to his lips. The movement is delicate, practiced, and you wonder how often he’s had to formally take a sip of something out of courtesy. But a slight nod to the side from him, indicating to meet him outside, washes away the question.

As you step onto the balcony, the chill of wind brushes over your arms, making you shiver. The cold doesn’t last long, though, as the warmth of a Jedi robe wraps around you.

“Please, don’t give this up, I’ll survive without it,” you say, but Mace shakes his head once at your words.

“I have sleeves to protect me, you don’t. You need it more than I do.”

“If you insist,” you reply, a small smile coming to your lips, him matching the expression. He holds out his hand to you, and you set yours inside his palm before he gently leads you over to the rails overlooking the city below.

The lights of the night sparkle and glow around you, and you breathe in a breath of fresh air. In mere seconds, the world around you seems to fall away, all except Mace.

“You look quite stunning tonight,” he comments, and your face warms.

“I suppose seeing me wearing your things might elicit that thought.”

“That’s hardly what I mean. My words are of before you joined me at my side.”

“Then I give you my thanks,” you reply, seeing his smirk from the side of your eye.

“No need for such formalities, y/n,” he says, stepping closer to you in the light of the night. “No one is paying us any attention, nor can they hear us.”

“Yes, but we’re still in view from the door in the chance someone looks out,” you say, and with the gentlest of touches, Mace grabs your elbow and leads you further away from possible glances.

“Does this suit you better?” he asks, turning back to you once the door is no longer able to reveal your forms. You smirk, wanting to say something, but Mace knows you all too well and shuts down your snark before you have the chance to voice it.

“We cannot be overly secretive, you are still the main subject of this celebration.”

“True, but that doesn’t mean we can’t…celebrate afterwards,” you say, letting a bit of implication leak into your words. If he notices, Mace doesn’t show any acknowledgement. Instead, he slips his arm around your waist and turns you to look back out into the city.

“Do you see how peaceful it is out there? How simple life must seem, not having the fate of the galaxy resting on your shoulders?”

“Yes, I often wonder what my life might have been like, if I would be out there, had I not been brought into the Order.”

“Do you ever wish you weren’t?” The answer to this question is one you’ve thought about more than you probably should, but every day the call of a simpler life reaches your ears, and you’re tempted by its sweet allure. You resist though, knowing that it is your fate to be a Jedi.

“Do you want my honest answer, or the one I think will satisfy you more?”

“Honesty will satisfy me, even if I don’t take a liking to the answer.”

“Then, yes. I often wonder what my life would be like. I imagine it would be simpler, happier, with more meaning than just serving others.”

“Your life does have meaning,” Mace says, “more than just serving others.”

“Please, do elaborate,” you say, resting an elbow on the railing to lean on it while you look at him. He copies your position, letting his eyes search you before responding.

“Your life’s meaning is to spread your ways, teach those who are in need of guidance. Show them your heart and your kindness.”

“That’s still serving others,” you point out, and he lets out a sigh as he looks back to the city.

“I suppose it is.”

“I want to live for myself, not for the Republic. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy, proud, to help, but it’s…”

“Not all you want from life,” he finishes for you, and you nod. “I don’t suppose I could give you anything you desire, either.” As soon as his words reach your ears, you’re responding before you can stop yourself. And you say them all too casually, much to your sudden dread.

“Perhaps not for as long as I wish, but maybe just for a night you can indulge me.” Just like before, if the insinuation registered in his mind, he did not show any sign of it. Instead, he merely turns to you and motions towards the door. You worry that you may have overstepped, but his hand resting on your waist buries that fear.

“I’d hate to keep you from your own celebration for too long,” he says as he leads you back to the door. You resist the urge to snark back, to tell him how much you’d rather be out here, alone, with him. Just before the light of the room hits you, you shrug off his Jedi robe and hand it back to him, not meeting his gaze. When he notices your avoidance, he gently reaches out and lifts your chin.

“Enjoy the evening, my dear,” he says, before leaning in close to whisper in your ear, “and perhaps we can enjoy the night together afterward.” His words strike you when you’re unprepared, and when he steps back, he makes careful not to spare you more than a brief smirk before heading back inside. After taking a moment to calm your mind, you step back inside as well, immediately falling in to mingle with the guests.

The next few hours feel like they rush and drag at the same time. Your anticipation to know what exactly Mace had meant fought with your resolve to be a good host to your guests. It was no doubt that Agen caught on to your slight impatience, but he didn’t pry. Perhaps he has an idea of what it’s about, and doesn’t want to know the details.

You don’t miss a single glance that Mace gives you throughout the night, as if, once again, you have a sense for it. Your eyes never linger on each other for long, though. The moments are fleeting, which is all the more enticing to you.

“You look dreadfully bored, my Padawan,” Agen comments as you end a conversation with another newly Knighted Jedi. You scoff in response, giving him a raised brow.

“Has it taken you this long to come to that conclusion?”

“No, I suspect you were bored from the moment I left your side, but even so, it’s quite visible now.”

“That’s only because you know how to read me. You’ve spent too much time with me.”

“Twelve years with someone by your side will do that to you,” he chuckles. “I still remember when you were that little thirteen year old youngling, meeting me for the first time.”

“Can we go back to when you said I was bored? I don’t think reminiscing on my teen years from your view will help with that.”

“No, I suppose not,” he sighs. “But I can’t help but try and hold onto the memory of when you were young. You’re grown, now. You have been for a few years, but your Knighting has brought a new light to that realization.”

“Well, as you said earlier,” you say, resting a hand on his arm, “I’ll always be your little Padawan.” A smile spreads over his lips before he pulls you in for a hug. You giggle in his grasp before he slowly lets go.

“I guess I should be letting you get back to your quarters for the night. People are beginning to leave, and I’d hate to bore you further.”

“You’ll never bore me,” you say reassuringly, “except for when you talk like an old man about ‘when you were younger’.”

“Good to know that you enjoy my company,” he chuckles before locking eyes with someone behind you. “Although, I think my company may be replaced quickly.”

“I don’t intend to intrude on you,” Mace says, and you turn to look at his warm smile. “I was going to ask if you were escorting her back to her room, and if not, I was going to offer to walk with her.”

“By all means, if she accepts,” Agen says, smiling one last time before heading out the doors himself. Mace extends his arm to you, and you loop yours through. You say a few final goodbyes to others before you’re alone in the hall, walking along to your quarters.

“I hope your evening was well,” he says, and you let out an amused huff.

“It was quite boring, in fact.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Are you planning on making my night better?” you ask, and Mace quirks a brow before stopping at your door. The air grows thick between the two of you, and you feel your skin tingling with anticipation for his response.

“As I said earlier, I cannot give you what you desire,” he says, reaching out to gently rest his palm against your cheek. “But as you said, perhaps just for tonight I can indulge you.”

“Is this what you want?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper.

“What I want can’t be had, but this will suffice,” he replies, and you nod. He steps back to allow you to enter your room code, and you both step quietly inside. Your quarters are simple, like all other Jedi quarters. A kitchen area and common area connected, a refresher, and a bedroom.

As though he’s been here a million times, and perhaps he has, you haven’t kept count, he removes his shoes and leaves them beside yours at the door. When you turn back to him, your nerves betray you. Having someone over for a passionate night isn’t quite your normal thing, and you don’t exactly know how to go about it.

“Would you like a glass of water to help you relax?” Mace offers, but you let out a small laugh at his question.

“These are my quarters, I should be offering you a drink,” you reply, earning a caring look from him.

“Anybody can take care of others, no matter where they are or who may be the guest.”

“I’m okay,” you say, and he nods. You turn again, and his hand comes to rest on your lower back as he leans down to your ear.

“My dear, you’re alright. I will give you what you ask for tonight.” You nod, taking in a shaky breath. “Would you like me to lead?” You nod again, and a slight pressure from his hand has you stepping forward. He walks with you to your bedroom, and once inside, he prompts you to crawl onto your bed.

“We can go however fast you wish,” he states, sitting next to you on the edge. His hand is gently rubbing against your leg, not in a sexual way, but one that’s supposed to be relaxing. And it works, you feel your shoulders and eyelids dropping slowly as the tension leaves your body.

“That’s it,” he mumbles, and you open your eyes to meet his gaze again. With heat coming to your cheeks, you reach out and grab his hand. He lets you pull it, a silent urge for him to come closer. As he said before, he abides by your wish.

You pull him up closer, and rest his hand at the side of your body so that he’s leaning over you. The beating of your heart is fast as you take a steadying breath. He waits, and when you reach up, he allows you to pull him forward, meeting him halfway to connect your lips.

They’re sweet, much to your surprise. You don’t know what you had been expecting, but it wasn’t this. You find yourself craving more, wanting to chase the rest of the night. But you know you need to ease into things, take your time. This will likely be your only night with Mace, and you want to savor it, enjoy it as if it’s your last night alive.

You lay back a bit more, and he shifts over you to be more comfortable. The heat from his body radiates through both his clothing and yours, tingling your skin with every heartbeat. You’ve only ever dreamed that you would be this close to him, and now it doesn’t feel like reality.

The lack of touch between the two of you suddenly makes its way to your mind, and you find your hands moving up to brush back his robe away from his shoulders. He pulls back from you, breaking the kiss to look in your eyes. Your expression is shy, and you try to avoid meeting his gaze, but his hand on your chin doesn’t allow you to look anywhere else.

“Talk to me, y/n. I can’t read your mind and I don’t know what you want. I will not do anything unless you tell me to.”

“I want you to take your robe off,” you mumble, and he raises a brow at you.

“Is that all you would like me to take off?” You bite your lip, a heat coming to your cheeks. You feel his eyes boring into you, and once again, he grabs your chin to make you look at him.

“All of it.”

“All of what?” he asks.

“Your clothes. I want you to take them all off.”

“As you wish,” he says, pushing himself away from you completely. You sit up and watch as he stands beside your bed, stripping each piece of clothing off slowly, giving you opportunities to ask him to stop, but you don’t. When he finishes, you feel the heat burning your cheeks when you take him in.

“Am I to be the only one without my clothing, or are you going to join me?” he asks, and you purse your lips before standing as well. He sits on the edge of your bed and watches you like you had watched him. You try to hide how vulnerable you feel, but your expression betrays you.

“Are you sure you want this?” Mace questions, and you immediately meet his gaze again.

“No! I mean, yes!” you blurt out, face growing even warmer, if possible, at your sudden response. “I want this. I just…”

“I understand,” he says, “this is new for you, so I need you to communicate with me. Are you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?” he asks, raising a brow at your seemingly uncomfortable expression.

“Yes, I’m just nervous, that’s all,” you explain. He nods, a thoughtful look spreading over his features for a few seconds.

“Are you willing to tell me when something is wrong?”

“Yes.”

“Then if you wish to continue, I expect you to keep your word.”

“I will, Mace,” you say, and something flickers in his eyes. Perhaps it was caused by the same strange feeling you got when you used his name, something you rarely, if ever, do.

“Now that we are both stripped,” he says, cutting into the silence, “what would you like to do next?”

“Can we stop being so…formal?” you ask, and he tilts his head questioningly. “I don’t want this to feel like…like I’m telling you what to do. I want it to be natural, like we both want this. You do want this, right?”

“Yes, y/n,” he says, letting out a sigh. “I want this, but-”

“No, it’s a yes or no question, nothing else. No layers, no excuses or explanations.”

“Fine. Yes, I want this.”

“So let’s just let it happen, however it feels natural,” you say, and he studies you for a second before nodding again. He moves further back onto the bed, and you crawl on after him. Carefully, making sure he is okay with it, you move over to hold yourself above him. His hands move up to trail over your skin, starting at the tops of your thighs, going over your hips, and stopping at your breasts. You suck in a sharp inhale when his hands squeeze, not too harshly, but enough to send a tingle of something through you. His fingers find your nipples, and he rolls them between his digits, pulling a new sound from you.

“Beautiful,” he mutters when your eyes meet his. Your teeth find your lip again, but you don’t shy away. Instead, your palm runs down his chest, feeling the heat of his skin. Each breath he takes causes his body to rise and fall, and you subconsciously sync your breathing with his.

One of his hands trails up further, brushing over your collarbone before moving to the back of your neck. He gives a slight pull, and your lips are crashing back to his. Your mouths move together while hands roam over each others’ body.

More tingling spreads through you at his caresses, and it moves lower and lower, closer to your core. It spikes when Mace shifts under you, legs brushing against yours as he adjusts to a more comfortable position. He had knocked you wider, and it brought your attention to the wetness you suddenly became aware of.

Pulling back and taking a breath to steady yourself, you reach your hand between your legs and drag your fingers through your folds. Mace watches as the slick arousal coats your fingers, and his eyes don’t move away as you testingly plunge one inside of you. He catches every movement and observes every reaction to them, committing each to memory.

You rock back onto your fingers, pulling a soft moan from your lips. The sounds coming from you are the only ones to fill the room, which is otherwise silent as Mace watches you. With each slip of your fingers inside, they go deeper and deeper until you’re down to your knuckles.

Your eyes catch the movement of Mace’s own hand snaking down to his core, and you see his arm flex slightly as it begins to rise and fall. You feel a sense of pride boil in you at the thought of him getting aroused by the sight of you pleasuring yourself.

“Is this what you’ve imagined me doing to you when you’re alone at night?” he asks, and you look up at him innocently. You bat your lashes while rocking back onto your fingers, pulling a soft moan from yourself.

“I’ve imagined quite a lot more than this,” you admit, quickening your pace slightly. You glance down, watching him pump his cock in his hand. You can’t help but imagine what it feels like, and how it will feel when he’s inside you. A low groan falls from his lips as he relaxes further into your bed, eyes focused on where your fingers disappear inside you. His pace matches your own, and despite not touching each other, the moment is a special shared intimacy. Each of you wants to feel the other, but neither of you dares to make the move. That is, until a thought crosses your mind.

You slip your fingers from inside of you and meet Mace’s gaze. He watches as you move your hand and slowly wrap around his length. His own hand leaves, and he waits for your next move. You bite your lip, eyes lowering to watch as you spread your slick covered fingers over him.

“Can I?” you ask, and he nods. You slowly begin to work your grip up, brushing your thumb over the tip when you reach it. A quiet but sharp inhale is all the confirmation you need to know that that had felt good.

You drag your hand down, spreading the slick even more. Releasing your grip on him briefly, you gather more of your arousal on your fingers before taking hold of him again, making sure to cover his length in it. Once you do, you quicken your pace slightly, testing different things to see what he likes. At one point, he bucks his hips up, trying to chase your touch. You smirk down at him, and he returns your look with one that is almost neutral, but you know him well enough to decipher what he’s trying to hide.

He wants more, not just from you, but of you. He wants more than just this night, and in his eyes you can see the life he’s imagining. You can see all the possibilities that could happen if you both were to take this and run with it, if you were to leave the Order and find a new life. But you could also see the resolve that these are hopeless wishes, and that this night is all either of you can afford to have.

You feel him starting to tense more in your hand, so you slow down on his length, and something lingers in your gaze as you stare at each other. A silent question sits on your tongue, and you want to ask, but fear stops you. Fear of rejection, fear that this is all the farther Mace wants to go with you tonight, or ever.

“Just for tonight?” you ask quietly, not the question you’d wanted, but the one that covers any you may have.

“Just for tonight,” he agrees, and you nod. You shift then, moving your body up until your core is hovering above his length. You lick your lips, and his hands find their way to your waist. Gently, he urges you down, and you bite back the gasp that wants to escape as you start to take him.

His cock stretches you, and you do your best to keep in the whimpers that threaten to escape. Though it isn’t your first time being stretched, it is your first time having something other than your own fingers or toys inside you. You sink down slowly, letting yourself adjust as you do. His fingers trail over you soothingly, a silent assurance that you can take all the time you need, and that you can stop any time you want.

When he’s fully inside you, you take a few moments to just sit on him and adjust to the feeling of his cock inside. His hands still rest on you, and he has a patient expression on his face, eyes roaming over you as he waits. He wants this to last, you can see it in the way he holds himself and how he looks at you. You can even feel it in his gentle touches, fingers caressing over your skin as though you’re the most fragile thing he’s ever held. And perhaps you are. Perhaps tonight you’re more at risk of being broken than you ever have been before.

Once you feel as though you’re ready, you begin to move on him. You slowly ease yourself up, pulling halfway off of him before sinking back down. The movement is slow, and you repeat it a couple of times before Mace’s hand slides from your hip to your back before he gently pushes your body down closer to his. He lets out a pleased groan at the new angle your bodies created, and your mouth falls open silently as he begins to work his own hips.

“Are you feeling okay?” he asks, pausing briefly when you let out a quiet sound. A shy smile covers your lips, and you nod, reaching up to brush your palm over his cheek. He doesn’t lean into it like you want, but you also know he’s holding back just slightly, not wanting himself to give fully into his desires because he wouldn’t be able to stop himself after tonight if he did.

“I’m okay. Just not used to…another person,” you admit.

“I wish I could help with that more,” he responds, and your cheeks warm at the comment. “Unfortunately, though, one night can’t achieve that.”

“It’s alright. This feels…natural. Like it was supposed to be.” His hips pause then, as he had resumed his movements. His eyes study you closely as he chooses his next words carefully.

“Please, y/n,” he says after a moment of silence, “I will give you this night, but you cannot talk of what more you want, because I am unable to give it to you. I may want to, but my wants do not compare to the needs of others and the life I have sworn to live. After this, I do not want to think about what I cannot have. I want to be able to accept what happened and move on.”

“So you just want to do this so it’s over with?” The question falls from your lips before you can even think about it, and instantly you feel guilty. But with how he’s talking, this is what he’s making you feel.

“No, that is not what I mean, y/n,” he says, reaching up and moving you to face him again. “What I mean, is that I don’t need this to be harder than it already is, not being able to give you my entire love. I want to give you so much more, but the danger of attachment is too much. I want to savor this night, and memorize it, so that no matter what, I will always know that I got to have you as mine, even if it was just for tonight.”

“But you know I’ll always be yours, even if you can’t have me,” you say quietly, and his expression softens slightly at your words, almost as if pain was trying to break through. Instead of responding, he pulls you down again and brings your lips to his, and you share a deep kiss as your bodies start moving again.

You let soft moans slip from your lips to vibrate against his own. A hand on his chest feels his groans as they rumble through him. Your body burns where he touches, and yearns for more every time you feel him slip out of you, only for him to push himself deep again.

The rhythm you create is one you don’t think you could ever forget. It’s a melody that only two bodies moving as one can produce. It’s unlearnable, only a song that happens once, and then it’s lost forever, except in distant memories. You fear you’ll forget it one day, or that it will turn sour. But when you look into Mace’s eyes again, those fears melt away.

You move your hips faster, beginning to chase the sweet release that you know his body will bring yours. He follows your lead and quickens his own pace, and it feels as though he’s reaching deeper than before. You push yourself up and away from his chest, positioning so that you can look down on him as you bounce on his lap. His hands hold your waist steady, one hand slipping to grip your ass slightly as he watches you take him. Groans leave his mouth in quiet bursts, almost as though he’s trying to resist letting them out. You smirk at that, and gently drag your nails down his chest, taking in his reaction.

He lets out another lengthy groan, and his muscles ripple under your touch. You drag your hand back up, palm rubbing smoothly over him. His grip on your tightens again, and he reaches up to pull you back down to him. When you fall forward, you barely have enough time to adjust to the position before he’s moving you into another.

You find your back hitting the bed, and you open your eyes to see Mace above you now. Something flickers in his eyes, you can’t tell quite what it is, but it reminds you of passion and lust. You open your mouth to say something, but your words turn into moans as he thrusts into you, having better leverage in this position.

You let your eyes fall closed again, and gasp when you feel the pinch of teeth grazing your collar bone. It’s followed by the smooth, wet feeling of his tongue easing the brief pain. A trail of kisses then crawls over your neck, each one being placed in time with his thrusts. Your hand finds its way to his back, and when he starts snapping his hips into you more harshly, your nails find themselves digging in.

A groan vibrating across your chest from where Mace’s mouth was sucking shoots heat through your body. It travels deep into your core, and you feel yourself tighten around him. Another groan in a different spot does the same, and you tighten once more. He chuckles to himself, and you can only assume he’s found amusement in this little trick.

“If the way your walls choke my cock when I do that are any indication of how you feel, I think I can confidently say that you enjoyed that,” he says. Before you can get the chance to respond to his comment, he tries another new thing. His fingers sneak between your bodies and find your clit, immediately beginning to toy with it. You squirm at the new stimulation, a less sophisticated sound being pulled from deep within you. Your legs move up to wrap around his hips, and he lets out a grunt when you start using them to pull him deeper.

“Kriff, you’re eager for me,” he huffs out, looking down at your eyes squeezed shut. You open them then, meeting his gaze as he holds a smirk.

“You’re just trying to get me to cum on your cock,” you snark back, and his expression turns slightly more intrigued.

“Perhaps,” he says before leaning down to your ear. “Or perhaps I want to feel you spasm around me. Maybe I want your walls to squeeze my cock as you fall over the sweet edge of orgasm. Maybe I want to make you mine, even if I can’t have you ever again.” Words fail you as you attempt to come up with a response to him. Even here, in bed with you, he can be indirect and still have you craving to give him anything and everything he wishes.

Mace sits back, still letting you pull his hips into you, but in a position where he can see all of you sprawled beneath him. The sight is one he commits to memory, ingraining it in every way possible. His fingers still dance on your clit, rubbing at the nub and trying to pull your orgasm from you. His other hand reaches forwards to massage a breast again, fingers twisting and pulling around the nipple.

The mixing of all his movements almost overwhelm you, your mind not knowing where to focus. You can no longer hold back any sounds that leave you, and the way you tighten around Mace tells him that you’re nearing your end. His movements become more meaningful, more determined, and before you know it, you’re falling over the edge that you’ve wanted to jump from for so long.

Mace keeps up his pace as you ride out your orgasm, and soon enough his own follows. He falls forward and grips the sheets beside your head as he releases deep within you, and his quiet groan is all the more your hear from him, other than his ragged breaths when your bodies calm down.

You lay there for a few minutes, each of you regaining yourselves. When Mace pushes himself up, he looks deep into your eyes for a second, reaching out to carefully caress your cheek. You try to grab it to hold his hand there, but he pulls away. You can see in your eyes why, and the weight of reality falls on you again.

He slides himself from you, leaving to grab a cloth to clean you up. As you lay there and wait, you wonder whether or not if you have made a mistake. If giving into your desires for just one night would be worth it. But when he returns and gives you his typical look, the one that shows neutrality to anyone else, but confesses his lust for you, you know that this was worth it.

“I’ll be going back to my quarters when we have cleaned up,” he states, slowly dragging the cloth over you. “I’m afraid our night is coming to an end.”

“Does it have to right away?” you ask, your hand loosely gripping his wrist. He meets your pleading gaze, and gently removes your hand from him with a small nod.

“Yes, unfortunately I must leave.”

“Does this change things?” He pauses when you ask this, and then stands from where he had been sitting beside you. He redresses silently, back facing towards you. When he finishes, he heads to the door of your bedroom but pauses again. He lets out a sigh and looks back at you, showing you the most raw emotion he’s ever shown before.

“Yes, it does. Because now I know that I could have everything I’ve ever dreamed of with you, if I just left the Order. It has become more tempting, and I will have to be stronger to resist. Things will change, not between us, but within me.”

“I’m sorry,” you say quietly, looking down at your bare form. Silence follows, but after a few seconds, a gentle touch on your chin lifts it to meet Mace’s gaze. It’s firm, almost serious, as he looks down at you.

“Do not be sorry, y/n. Tonight was perfect, everything I could have wanted, and I can only hope it was the same for you.”

“It was,” you sigh. “It was.” The hand on your chin moves to your cheek and he holds it softly as he leans down, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. He doesn’t linger, though, and when he breaks away, you let out another sigh.

“Goodnight, my love,” he says quietly, letting his hand fall as he steps back and once again heads to the door. This time, he doesn’t pause, and he silently steps out and makes his way to leave your quarters, leaving you to replay the night over in your mind, searching for something more.

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