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paarthurnax59 · 11 months

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"Happy Memorial Day, bro."

Summary: It’s Memorial Day and you pay a visit to Steve Roger’s grave, your twin brother, with your husband and your kids. When facing his headstone, you are confronted with grief and guilt. Logan then decided to help you bring the closure that you needed.

Pairings: Steve Rogers x sister!Reader, Logan Howlett x Rogers!Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, abandonment, reader is depicted as being Caucasian, grief, talks of suicide.

Important note: Regardless of how you feel about American politics today, please keep the comments respectful and do not dishonor those that paid the ultimate price for sustaining peace in the world. All who leave disrespectful comments will be blocked.

Also, if you have served or have family members that served, whether be American or any other countries military that have passed on, please share!

As Logan pulled the classic car up to Arlington Cemetery, you grabbed the flowers and photos, along with an American flag that Bucky helped you fold up. Both he and Sam were going to meet you after you had visited the cemetery with your kids, Charlotte and Joey, both nestled in the back sound asleep from the long car ride. Unbuckling your seat belt, you looked to the crowd of people. Mourning families and couples standing in front of the headstones of their deceased loved ones who paid the ultimate price. You saw as many people lay solemnly on the ground of the graves. There was this one older woman that you saw brushed her fingers on the headstone in front of her, as the tears began to fall from her wrinkled cheeks.

“Baby?” You heard Logan’s voice, snapping you out of your trance, making you look into those beautiful hazel eyes you had grown to adore. “You alright?” He asked as he touched your face, gently stroking your smooth skin.

“I’m okay…just feels weird being back here again. Almost three months since the funeral.”

“Yeah, I know.” Logan replied as he got closer to you and kissed your forehead with a comforting hand on the back of your head.

It had been three months since your twin brother, Steve, had passed away. After he returned the stones, he went back to the 1940’s and had the life with Peggy. The life that you had with Logan, a home and a family. He never truly got over her. The woman that was the very first, possibly the only woman, to show him interest while he was still your scrawny, older brother. When Steve went through the platform and disappear, he didn’t come back. Instead, you all looked to the lake and saw an old man sitting on a bench. That old man was your big brother.

He told you about when you all had defeated Thanos and how he wanted to leave this time and go back. You objected at first and even got angry at him for even abandoning you once more. The first time in the ice, and now to go back to the 40’s. Leaving behind his niece and nephew, his family to chase some dream that died the moment he crashed that plane in the 40’s. You refused to talk to him after a few days after that. Bucky had to literally drag you to the site where Steve had to return the stones. Logan was at your side the entire time as Steve gave you one last look before leaving through the time machine, never to return. Looking back, you began to think differently, and it was eating away at you.

“Come on, let’s get the kids up.” Your husband interjected, making you nod your head in agreement and got out of the car and to the back seat. “Munchkins? Wake up. We’re here!” Logan gently shook your daughter while you unstrapped your son from his car seat. The little two-year-old boy began to stir from his sleep as you picked him up and into your arms. You thanked your lucky stars that he didn’t start crying.

“Daddy…” Your four-year-old girl awoke from her sleep and hugged Logan as he got her up from her own car seat. “Where are we?”

“We are at Arlington Cemetery, little munchkin. It’s where many of the brave soldiers are buried.” Logan explained to his child. Both you and Logan decided long ago that you would be honest with them when it came to grim topics, like death. Seeing the line of work, you are both in and all of the things you had seen, it made sense to let them know of the nature of the world.

“Like uncle Stevie?” She asked sadly, making the both of you look at each other with gloom.

“Yes, Like uncle Stevie, angel.” You replied.

Steve and Lottie, Steve’s nickname for her, were as close as an uncle and niece could get. As soon as she was born, like Logan, Steve was wrapped around her finger. Whenever Steve would come over, it was the best day of the week for Lottie. Playing tea parties, having sleepovers at his place, baking in the kitchen, trips all around the city. the Zoo, Coney Island and Central Park, you name it. Lottie adored Steve and he loved her just as much. It was one of the main reasons that you got so angry at Steve for leaving.

Lottie was devastated when she found out her uncle Steve wasn’t coming back. At least, not how she remembered him anyway. You tried you best to explain to her that he wanted to go back to the 40’s, so he can have his own life. She still didn’t understand, which you were sympathetic. She was only a child and trying to explain quantum time travel were complicated to her already. All she thought was that her Uncle Steve had abandoned her. She didn’t eat or sleep for days after she was told Steve wasn’t going to return. You took her to the hospital when Steve was struck ill. She eventually was able to warm up to him again and Steve had shown her all the pictures of his own family. Of her aunt Peggy, and his son and daughter. Tony and (Name), naming both after the most important people in his life. You were happy for him, but at the same time had wished he would have found his happiness here in this time.

After the funeral, Lottie had stayed in her room. Barely speaking a word to anyone, even her own parents. It took a long time for her to cope with her beloved uncle’s death. You even had Morgan visit her, seeing as they were also very close one another. Time was the only thing that was going to heal her, just like you.

“Let’s go, you got everything? You need me to grab anything?” Your husband asked and you shook your head.

“No, just take Joey. I got everything.” You answered and handed him your son, who was very happy to in his father’s arms. Grabbing all the stuff, your family strolled into the crowded cemetery.

As you walked into the cemetery with your family, you watched all the many people swarming the place, paying their respects to the honored dead. A few crying widows, children standing with their parents in front of headstones and parents mourning for their deceased child. Even fellow veterans kneeling in front of their fallen comrades’ final resting place, the lucky ones that made it back. It would make one wonder how many times you had come here before Steve was found in the ice. Kneeling in front of the graves of both Steve and Bucky, talking to them both like they could hear you. How you considered yourself lucky that you were the one Rogers that made it home. You were a nurse, like your mom, serving for the US Army, but still fought with your fellow commandos. There was never a guarantee of coming home from war. Once you had met some cooks that had to take up arms in the heart of battle. Back in the day, it didn’t matter what your station was or rank. You fight in the most dire situations. It what it meant to be a part of the military. Everyone is counting on you for something.

“More crowded than I thought.” Logan interjected as he carried to two tired children across the hallow grounds, staring at all the people as they come by.

“Yeah, it is.” You agreed as you continued to walk the historic cemetery. A few people recognized you and walked up to both you and Logan and thanked your for saving the world. As you continued your forlorn march through the grounds, you reached yours and Logan’s destination. Steve’s grave, lying next to your father’s grave, who died back in the first World War.

“Here we are.” Logan said as he placed down both his children. “Let me get those, sweetie. You can place the flowers down.” He turned to you and grabbed the flag and pictures. Logan stood back a little with your kids, allowing you to place the flowers by his grave. Taking a deep breath, you stepped forward and placed the flowers on your beloved brother’s grave. Red poppies, that symbolized remembrance and hope for a peaceful future. A flower used commonly for occasions such as days like today. Memorial Day. Logan then placed the flag which was encased in glass and some of the pictures of Steve form both the forties and the modern era. You all stepped away and as you did, your little girl stood by you, clinging onto your leg, sniffling as she looked at her uncle’s gravestone. Your son soon joined in with you as he stood by his older sister, despite no knowing what was going on. Logan walked toward you, placed his arm around and sighed.

“I feel guilty, you know.” Your voice cracked as you look at Logan with the saddest expression that he had ever seen you make. Tears started to seep from your eyes.

“Why? You have done nothing wrong.” He asked truly growing confused as to why you, his wife, felt like you had to say such a thing. Logan and Steve may not have always gotten along, but one thing he knew for certain was that your brother knew Logan loved you.

You two had met back when you were serving as an Army nurse in the 40’s. He was serving with your brother as part of the Hollowing Commandos. Your eyes met and the both of you could not look away when you were both in the same area. You had dated for a time, but when you lost Steve in the ice, you broke up after due to not getting over your supposed brother’s death. You traveled around the world when you found yourself meeting the Ancient One, sorceress supreme. She had revealed to you of the great potential to become a powerful sorceress. You accepted her training and through the decades severed her and the Masters of the Mystic Arts. Never aging or growing ill. Throughout the years, you grew close with the ancient one. Sharing with her about your grief and loss, of both Logan and Steve.

“All things that are meant to be… will come to pass in its own time.”

She told you at one point about the pain you had endured. That whatever is meant to be, will happen. You trusted her words, believing and hoping things will work out like they are meant to. When word broke out that Captain America had been freed from the ice, and was alive, you left for the States as quickly as possible. You arrived by portal at SHIELD headquarters, ready to welcome your brother back home.

When he first saw you, he was in shock of how you remained young and spry as you were. You told him that you had become a sorceress of the mystic arts. Over the years, you fought together, against Loki, aliens, genocidal robots, dark warlocks, and the Brotherhood of Mutants. He stayed with you through the good and the bad times you had in this time, just like when you were kids fighting off bullies in Brooklyn.

After finding your ex, Steve helped you through Logan had no memory of who you were. After you helped Logan gain back his memories, you started relationship from square one. Overtime, your love for each other had restored and blossomed. The two of you wedded within a year, with Steve as Logan’s best man and Natasha as your maid of honor, with Charles conducting the ceremony. Thus, your married life with Logan began. Soon, after you both had two children together, Charlotte Stephanie Howlett and Joseph Logan Howlett. Named after the most important people in your life.

Even though Steve had said he was happy for you, you could help but noticed the Longing gaze he had when he watched you and your family. Looking as though he was missing out on something, or someone. While in this era, his entire life was dedicated to duty and keeping the world safe. Barely even had time to rest or even start a life of his own. You finally were starting to realize, he needed to leave in order to live the lie he wanted. He needed to go back to a time where everyone believed him to be dead. To be with the one whom he never stopped loving, like you with Logan. Suppose that runs in the family.

“I should have been more supportive of him, you know. Of him wanting to go back to the forties.” You admitted sadly as the guilt started to take hold of you while you looked deep into Logan’s eyes and then the tears started to fall. Logan held onto your hands tightly as you started to sob. “Ever since he was rescued from the ice, Steve always felt like he was out of place. He was like a ghost, trapped in a world where he no longer belonged.” You continued as you cried, leaning into Logan all the while he rubbed your shoulders tenderly. “He wanted it, the life you and I got. Marriage, family, a much quieter existence and not be forced to go off and fight all the time. He was never going to have peace unless he left. I feel so selfish for trying to make him stay.” You cried harder as Logan wrapped his arms around you and held you as close as humanly possible. “All because I didn’t want to lose my brother again. I have lived for nearly seventy years without him. I lost my father, my mother and now I lost Steve. My twin brother.” Your two children looked up at you, knowing that you were in serious distress. They both surround you with tiny arms trying to engulf you in a hug to calm you down.

“Don’t cry, mama. We wuv you.” Your daughter mumbled as she too sounded like she was about to cry.

“Ma!” babbled your young son as he reached up and pulled at the hem of your dress, who was feeling exactly what his sister was feeling. You looked down and smiled as your son’s brown eyes widened with some tears in his eyes. The sorrow from your being so strong that it was affecting your own children.

“Joey, my sweet boy.” You said as you picked him up and kissed his sweet face fiercely and he cuddled close to your head. Logan had his little girl right in front of him and placed a warm comforting hand on her beautiful, blonde covered head.

“Sweetheart, if there’s anything in this world you are not, it’s selfish.” He calmed you down as you snuggled closer to your boy. “When I first met you, all those years ago, I couldn’t believe on how a beautiful woman like you could be so compassionate, caring and brave all in one.” He continued. “I saw on how much you cared for the injured and the wounded during the war. Even the enemies that had surrendered, you still gave them medical treatment even when others refused to help them. Not once, did you stop until every person had gotten aid. Steve and Bucky basically had to pull you away from the infirmary tent because you nearly burnt out from treating people.” A small smile creeped on your lips while the tars still fell down your pale cheek. “I wanted to ask you out so badly that I felt like the stars aligned perfectly when you said yes. I was so in love with you then that I wanted to ask you to marry me after the war had ended.” You chuckled at the memory of the short courtship that you and Logan had during the war. “Then…Steve went into the ice, and you were devasted. You were a shell of your once bubbly and loving self. I yelled and screamed at you to get over him. That he was dead and never coming back.” He sighed with a remorseful huff making him think back to the day of when you two breaking up. “Then you left. I regret it every day of my life for letting you walk away after that fight. However my stubborn ass-“

“Language, James. We have the kids here with us.” You interrupted him.

“God, you really are his sister.” He joked and you giggled despite the serious and heartbreaking conversation you both were having. “Anyway, I was just too stubborn to go back and help you through your loss. So, I went back into the army and fought like hell until I met Stryker. I got these,” He held out his fist and the adamantium claws came out. You weren’t sacred of them and reached out your free hand and touched them carefully so that you would not get cut. Logan then retracted them and went on with his story. “Then I lost my memory. For over twenty-five years, I had no idea of who I was or where I was going. I had no purpose or self-worth even. I was just going through the motions as I fought cage match after cage match, trying to make petty cash so I could eat. I was miserable and was alone with no one by my side. Every time…I looked at my claws…I wanted to just…end it.” He admitted making you cry again. You knew of Logan’s attempt at taking his own life, but you only heard it from Charles and Rouge. Never had you heard it through his own lips, like he was confessing an unpardonable sin. It truly made you hate yourself for ever leaving him in the first place.

“Logan, I’m sorry. I should have been there. I never should have-“

“Let me finish, honey. Please.” Logan softly interrupted you, making to you listen to his story. “However, I odiously couldn’t. I would heal after every attempt. Every cut and wound, I would just heal. Leaving no scare, scrape, or mark on my skin. There was nothing, like the void that I was so desperate to fill.” He looked down and saw that Charlotte was now the one hugging him, obviously feeling her father’s suffering. How you got so lucky with wonderful children like these two munchkins was beyond you. “Then I met Rouge, Charles and the X-men. They helped me to find answers of who I was. I helped protect and train the kids at the school. They gave me a purpose, one that I was satisfied with.” He alleged as he stroked his daughter’s hair. “But…every night…along with the nightmares…someone was there…calling out to me…telling me to hold onto her hand…saying that everything was going to be okay.” He whispered intensely, like it was deep, dark secret kept hidden deep, buried underneath all of the malice and hardship. “That voice…reaching out for me…was you.” He said in your ear, making your gasp and your heart race like a comet. “Somewhere out there, even though I had no idea of who or where you were, I knew you held the missing piece of me. I asked Professor Xavier once, but he said that he was not abled to see your face. Only able to hear the sweet sound of your voice.” Logan whispered in your ear, which made you blush. It’s amazing that after all these years, Logan still had this effect on you that made you so weak in the knees. “So, I ignored them, no matter how many times my dream image of you came back to me in my mind. Then the day came that the Avengers came…then… I heard you. Yelling at something your brother did as you came walking down that jet, cute as a button and fierce as a mountain lion.” You felt the smile form on his lips as he confessed his thoughts from the past. “I felt like I strayed into a daydream. Like my mind was playing tricks on me. Then I had the professor tell me in my head saying that he heard your voice as well and it wasn’t a mind games. When you saw me…you stopped in your tracks and tears began to well in your eyes. At that moment, I knew you knew me from somewhere. You came running to me, trying to embrace me like your life depended on it.” He picked up his pace in his tone, he sounded almost excited with the prospect of meeting you again like it was the first time he met you. “However, something deep inside of me, a much darker part of me, wanted to reject you. Shove you aside and stay as far away from you as humanly possible. So, I pushed you away, distrusting you in an instant and denied any interaction with you.” He said as you think back to you’re your experience meeting him again after all this time. You believed that because you broke up with him that he didn’t want anything to do with you and even hated you after that. When you talked with Charles about it, he said it was because his mind was at war with him. Fighting for who gets to be in control, Logan or the demons that were plaguing his mind. You wanted to help, you wanted Logan to end his suffering and bring his memories back. “Looking back, I hated myself for it, even then, I believed that you didn’t deserve it. I was too damaged and broken, so pushed you away so you didn’t get drag into my mess. A few days later I overheard you and Steve talking to Charles. About the possibility of getting my memories back.” That information surprised you. You didn’t think Logan was listening to your conversation with Charles.

“Charles told me that it might be too dangerous, but I refused to give up. I didn’t want to give up on you again, Logan. Walking away from you in the forties was the biggest mistake of my life.” You confessed to him, feeling like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders.

“I know, and I couldn’t be more grateful that you did.” He replied. “I told Charles that I agreed and would do my part as well to get back my memories. When you came to me with the spell, I was apprehensive, but I was more than willing to trust you, despite the battle that was going on in my head.” He acknowledged, thinking how risky it was to help him. “I was told of the risks…the risks of you being braindead.”

“It was worth the risk, Logan. You were worth the risk. Always were.” You sweetly talked to the love of your life. Logan truly didn’t know what else to say to that. You were willing to risk being a vegetable for the rest of your life it meant getting him back.

“And you succeeded.” He remarked with a kiss to your head. “What I’m trying to say, (Name), is that you are not selfish. Not even close to such accusations. Steve was your brother and you wanted him to stay. Nothing more.” Logan held you close as your entire family looked at Steve’s name that was scribed into the marble stone. “You were the best sister and the best wife and mother that anyone could ask for.”

“Best mama eva!” Lottie shouted and hugged you by your legs. You chuckled and bent down to kiss your daughter’s head.

“And you are the best daughter ever.” You claimed as she looked up at you. You looked to both family as you stood there looking at Steve’s grave for a little while longer. Soon, Buck and Sam came along to pay their respects to their best friend ns see you, Logan and the kids. You all stayed there for a while longer before heading to Sam’s place for a Barbeque. You packed up all the pictures and flag before heading out, leaving the flowers behind. One last time, you look back at the headstone and smiled before leaving with your family.

“Happy Memorial Day, Bro.”

#steve x reader #marvel #the avengers #angst #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers angst #captain america fluff #x men comics #x men movies #xmen rp #xmen x reader #wolverine #logan howlett #sister reader #wife reader #rogers reader

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submissiveking99 · 2 months

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X-MEN

Emma Frost/ White Queen (Anti-Heroine/former Villainess)

Emma Frost is the White Queen. Originally a villain for the Hellfire club, eventually joining the X-Men. She is sexy, she knows it, she flaunts it. A confident smirk on at all times as her telepathy, telekenisis and the ability to turn her body to diamonds makes her a rather tough boss bitch

X-23/ Wolverine/ Laura Kinney (Heroine)

Laura Kinney. X-23. Talon. Wolverine. This young lady has gone by so many names. A clone of Logan, being grown inside the womb of a scientist known as Sarah Kinney. So yeah, she's the Wolverine's daughter. Raised as an assassin, she eventually escaped. For a while she was emotionally dead, very dead on and quiet. She's slowly grown into her own person, and she is is a badass with a cocky smirk

Jean Grey/ Marvel Girl/ Black Queen/ Phoenix/ Dark Phoenix (Heroine)

Jean Grey has had several names. Marvel Girl, Black Queen, Phoenix, Dark Phoenix and more. One of the original five X-Men, Jean was the first 'mother' of the team, constantly in romantic drama because of Logan and Scott Summers. She is simple, calm and caring with some clear confidence

Goblin Queen/ Madelyn Pryor (Villainess/Anti-Heroine)

A clone of Jean Grey made by Mr Sinister. With all of Jean's powers, not knowing her origin, she got married to Cyclops and had a child with him... until Jean came back to life. Pushed away, Madelyn had her emotional weakness and instabilities used and abused by Mr Sinister and hell itself, giving her even more powers and turning her into the Goblin Queen to lead an invasion of Earth.

She has since become the Queen of Limbo and found a form of peace in her life, herself and the X-Men coming to an understanding.

Rachel 'Ray' Anne Summers/ Marvel Girl/ Phoenix (Heroine)

Rachel is the daughter of Scott and jean from the Days of Future's Past comic universe. When the Mutant Kind round up and extermination began Rachel, an already powerful telepath and teleknetic, was handed off to a mad scientist who turned her into one of his 'Hounds'. Tortured and brainwashed, reduced to nothing but an animal and attack dog. Literally dragged around on a chain leash to locate other mutants. Identification scars literally branded into her flesh.

She was conviced and birthed from a Jean who HAD merged with the Phoenix Force, making her almost more powerful than the force itself when trained properly and able to have the self belief to utilise said power. Strong enough that she can literally travel through time with said psionic powers.

She is a confident and playful person. Sassy but knows when to be serious

Storm/ Ororo Munroe (Heroine)

Storm, Ororo Monroe, one very powerful mutant. Seen as a goddess when her weather manipulation powers, she is a valuable leader and friend. The ebony beauty being the shining example of kindness and caring to a fault, almost

Psylocke (Heroine)

Read here

Rogue (either the classic Southern Bell version, or the goth version) (Heroine) (Heroine)

Rogue is one tough bitch. Her powers let her copy people's powers through touch, doing so also 'downloading' their memories because her powers absorb people's souls/life energy through touch. It is all a mental issue, however. One that has been over come a few times over the years. Sassy, fun and confident. I play both the classic comic version and the X-Men Evolution version

Jubilee/ Jubilation Lee (Heroine)

Jubilee is basically Wolverine's side kick, when she was younger especially. A 'mall rat', Jubilee's powers of releasing raw plasma energy almost appears like fire works to the naked eye

After the events of M-Day, Jubilee lost her powers and soon after became a vampire.

Now she is the best of both worlds with no weaknesses

Shadowcat/ Kitty Pryde (either the classic comic nerdy adventurer version, or the X-Men Evolution party girl version) (Heroine) (Heroine)

Wolverine's first sidekick, Kitty Pryde is able to phase her molocules through any solid object. Trained by oh so many people, she has mastered so many skills from sword fighting to being the captain of a pirate ship to hacking super computers without a worry

Magik/ Illyana Rasputin (Heroine)

Illyana is the younger sister of Colossus, she was tragically abducted to Limbo by the malignant Belasco when she was under the X-Men's custody. In the few seconds that passed on Earth, Illyana aged years in Limbo, a process which caused her to master different dark arts. Mentally and physically tortured. Many things happened through her life that ended up with Illyana becoming Queen of Limbo before then ascending even further and becoming their Sorcerer Supreme.

With deep and dark magic, she also has a sword made of her very soul and can teleport through dimensions

Scarlet Witch/ Wanda Maxamoff (Heroine)

Wanda Maxamoff has had a complicated history. A mutant, not a mutant. Related to Magneto, not. Her POWER SOURCE existing, then not. So... here is the super simple way I am playing her. A confident MILF of a woman, and a skilled heroine

Polaris/ Lorna Dane (Heroine)

Lorna Dane is the daughter of Magneto, and inherited his powers of magnetism. Despite seeming very calm and gentle, she is fearless and action focused. Ready to charge in at a moments notice.

Mystique (Neutral)

The mother of Rogue and Nightcrawler, her shape shifting abilities letting her change her appearance to ANY sort of humanoid. She can be very amoral and can be an assassin.

Domino (Anti-Heroine)

Domino is a hero who does not care about what she has to do to get the job done. Bang bang bang. Her powers let her manipulate her own luck. No matter how unlikely, or weird, everything turns out perfectly for her

GwenPool/ Gwen Poole (Heroine)

The info for the hero fangirl is right here

Lady Deadpool/ Wanda Wilson (Assassin/Anti-Heroine)

Look, she is a female Deadpool. And a canon character.

All I am going to say.

If I do this for too long she's gonna start breaking the 4th wall and I DO NOT want to deal with that shit in my bios.

Lady Death (neutral)

Death herself, the embodiment of Death. The one Deadpool loves, the being Thanos obsesses over. She is a friend, a lover, and an upcoming inevitability. A gentle hand to lead you to the next adventure, or a violent blade to force your story to reach its avoided conclusion.

I am using Lady Death from Coffin Comics as a stand in/face claim. Makes it easier.

Total Muses: 18/20

#open smut rp #open to all #open rp #marvel #read rules before interacting #xmen rp #comic rp

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