trying-not-to-fade

[trying-not-to-fade]

i just blew it. i just binged. and now i’m sobbing. why am i a failure. i was meant to be fucking fat my whole life why do i even try

#ana bllog #ana #tw ana fast #ana dairy #ana rant #ana trigger #ana meal #tw ana shit #tw ana diary #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #ed bllog #i wanna be weightless #i want to be weightless

[trying-not-to-fade]

after a week i have officially lost 10 pounds 😁😁😁

#ana bllog #ana #tw ana fast #tw ana shit #tw ana diary #ana dairy #ana rant #ana trigger #ana meal #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #ed bllog #i want to be weightless #i wanna be weightless

[trying-not-to-fade]

ditched myfitnesspal and am now using lose it. they don’t care how little i eat. they tell me my projection to my goal weight after i put im done logging for the day. i keep seeing the projection day get closer and closer when i barely eat 🥰🥰

#ana #ana bllog #tw ana fast #tw ana shit #tw ana diary #ana dairy #ana rant #ana trigger #ana meal #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #ed bllog #i want to be weightless #i wanna be weightless

[trying-not-to-fade]

i don’t deserve to be hungry

#ana #ana rant #ana dairy #tw ana diary #tw ana shit #ana trigger #tw ana fast #ana meal #ana bllog #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #i want to be weightless #i wanna be weightless

[trying-not-to-fade]

id rather drink my calories than eat them tbh

#ana #ana rant #ana dairy #tw ana diary #tw ana shit #ana trigger #tw ana fast #ana meal #ana bllog #ed not sherran #ed no sheeran #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw ed rant #tw ed diet #ed bllog #i wanna be weightless #i want to be weightless

[trying-not-to-fade]

i’m back. i’ve been back to restricting and exercising for the last week. so far have lost 8 pounds. today, i messed up. i had a these cinnamon buns coated in caramel and pecans and i have been feeling terrible about it ever since. my husband saw the box with the missing pieces and looked at me and said “better add an extra hour to your workout tonight” kind of surprised me. i don’t blame him. i had a baby a year ago and gained about 90-100 pounds. before then i had lost 70 pounds and was looking amazing. i took “eating for two” way too literal. that’s my problem. i either binge binge binge or don’t eat at all. there is no in between. i have a terrible relationship with food. but for now, not eating is definitely something i can benefit from. i don’t even want to post my weight. but here i am again. i lost a lot of weight before not eating and exercising a lot so i’m gonna do it again.

#tw ana shit #tw ana diary #ana dairy #ana rant #ed not sheeren #ed not ed sheeran #ed no sheeran #ed not sherran #ed bllog

[trying-not-to-fade]

it’s been so long since i’ve used this account. i got pregnant, gave birth and now i have a son!!!!! but now my mental health is shit. i gained back all the 60 pounds that i lost from before i was pregnant. and none of my clothes fit me anymore that i had bought from when i lost weight. so it’s time to get back to it. i’m tired of being a whale

#ana #fast #fasting #fat #gross #restrict #restricting #thinspo #ugly #weightlog #weightloss #depressed #depression #sad #skinny #thin

[trying-not-to-fade]

hey everyone. i’ve been doing really well!!!! restricting and counting calories once again. i have lost about 7 pounds. i’ve been playing my kinect from my xbox 360 lmao. and i’ve been doing a lot of dancing. and there’s also a sports game and i play baseball and football on there which requires a lot of running in place. been sticking to my goals for almost a week now, not going over my limit and i’m really proud of that. i just ordered my favorite ONE protein bars which are fucking amazing. i mainly eat those for my “dessert” or a fiber one 70 cal brownie. been eating a lot of veggies and fruits. let’s hope i don’t jinx myself again for the 80,000th time on getting back on track. but i’m feeling pretty motivated. i used to be a size small now i’m medium-large which makes me feel like absolute shit!!!! i ordered size large clothes from romwe a couples week ago and was so excited and when i tried them on.... let’s say it ruined my entire day and i started sobbing. also, my wedding is in 3 months!!!!!!!!!! so i need to look incredible for that. anyways..... so far off to a good start. please give me all the good juju so i continue losing weight once again haha

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #weightlog #weight log #weightloss #weight loss #sad #depressed #depression #work out #working out

[trying-not-to-fade]

i have been on the verge of passing out all morning at work and my heart rate has been a steady 130 when i’m just walking around

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #weightlog #weight log #weightloss #weight loss #binging #binge #sad #depressed #depression

[trying-not-to-fade]

ah yes, we love a loud grumbling stomach in the morning 🤩

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss #sad #depressed #depression #thin #skinny

[trying-not-to-fade]

just went through my old phone and looked at pics of when i was at my lowest weight. 29 pounds ago..... AND I WAS SO FUCKING SKINNY!!!!!!!! and i THOUGHT I WAS FAT AT THE TIME!!! ARE YOU KIDDING!?!?! i am my own thinspo atm..time to get back down to that weight and even lower. i feel so gross now. and to think i used to look like THAT!!!!! god i am disgusting

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #sad #depressed #depression #skinny #thin #binging #binge #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss

[trying-not-to-fade]

hey all. i know it’s been a while once again lmao. buuuuuut i NEED NEED NEED to get back on track. my wedding is in 134 days and i need to be looking SKINNNNNYY!!!!! the last several days i have been cutting my cals. i felt skinnier this morning and stepped on the scale and have lost 5 pounds since the last time i weighed myself so yay! but need to keep going. i need to hold myself accountable. no more binges. no more snacking at 2 am. low cal low cal L O W C A L

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #weightlog #weight log #weightloss #weight loss #skinny #sad #depressed #depression

[trying-not-to-fade]

Okay here’s what I ate

-2 dill pickles both wrapped in a slice of turkey: 18 cals

-1 snack baggy of cheddar rice chips: 90 cals

-3 bread and butter pickle chips: 10 cals

-1 pear: 103 cals

=221 calories

And I burned 265 calories working out today

So -44 calories today 😏😏😏

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #skinny #binging #binge #bodycheck #body check #sad #depressed #depression #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss #work out #working out

[trying-not-to-fade]

Okay I stopped crying and actually danced for about 30 minutes so now I feel better. I burned some calories and had fun so hell yeah

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #binging #binge #bodycheck #body check #skinny #sad #depressed #depression #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss #working out #work out

[trying-not-to-fade]

I really need to find workouts I enjoy bc if I don’t, I know I won’t do well during the workout. I feel like such a failure dude. This is pathetic and absolutely embarrassing

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #binging #binge #bodycheck #body check #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss #work out #working out #sad #depression #depressed

[trying-not-to-fade]

Haven’t eaten in 22 hours. Just failed miserably at a workout I had to stop so now that made me feel like shit. Wonderful. I suck at everything 🤙🏻🤙🏻🤙🏻

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #binging #binge #work out #working out #sad #depressed #depression #weightlog #weight log #weightloss #weight loss

[trying-not-to-fade]

Lmao heyyyyy. Once again for the 80th time gonna be back on my bullshit. I’ve been depressed lately and then decided to step on the scale today and that just made it worse so here I am once again for the millionth time to not be fat 🤪🤪🤪

#ugly #fat #gross #thinspo #ana #fasting #fast #restricting #restrict #skinny #binging #binge #sad #depressed #depression #weightlog #weight log #weight loss #weightloss